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Tracey in TX

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  1. For every common sense parent who pulls their daughter out of a group of provocative dancers, there are a dozen parents waiting to get into the winning-est group. One of my daughters does competitive cheer. The little girls (under 15-ish) use music which I would readily listen to, not "sexing" up the girls in order to win at all costs. I've seen some itty bitty girls (7 and under) from other clubs dance/cheer to very suggestive tunes and pat each other's bottoms in a not-so-innocent fashion.
  2. Sara O'Mara Rhonda Maronda Emile (boy) Barton (girl) Pajama (pronounced "Paj-uh-muh) Sparkles Princess Sam Hill (remember southern expression, "What in the Sam Hill...?) Father Church--priest Dr. Anger--therapist/anger management
  3. DH was supportive for the first 2-3 months. I stopped at 2 months with #1, and 7 months at #2 (much longer than DH could tolerate), and didn't nurse our triplets.
  4. Mean Girls happen. Often times it is a reflection on the mom, but part of it is truly their nature. Not all girls are mean. Not all means girls have mean moms, and some mean moms have sweet girls. The best you can do is to prepare your DD to handle nasty behavior and know it isn't a reflection on who SHE is, but the over-inflated sense of self-importance for the other girl. Having three daughters, we've seen a lot of girl garbage. The most sensitive DDs will be hurt. At the risk of sounding harsh, you either teach DD to let the comments/behavior roll off her back or she will be hurt. You can't control other kids' actions, but you can help navigate through a lifetime of girl garbage. (Let's be honest, we've probably all dealt with grown women who are, um, less than desirable to be around..) My oldest DD, 12, has had more than her share of mean girl experiences. It was a result of *twelve moms* who wanted their dds to be popular. They created a fifedom to ensure both daughters and moms were popular (seriously! LOL), and wouldn't allow girls to associate with others outside of their group. This lasted from kindergarten-6th grade. We left school in 4th grade and have been told it's only gotten worse as puberty has kicked in. The point of this story is that we've used examples of this behavior to discuss what friends are, and what they aren't. Being popular is really fun, but it can be fleeting. A true friend will stay with you through mean comments, zits, boyfriends, and bad outfits. A fair-weather friend will ditch you when it's not convenient or self-serving any longer. Mean girl is practically a syndrome now, and isn't going away anytime soon. Best we can do is take a negative and make it a learning experience and give our daughters the tools to combat future situations.
  5. We have several laptops in addition to desktops. There are some advantages to both. Biggest negative to a laptop is the greater likelihood of breaking because it is mobile. I was very concerned about my kids having computer access, so we put them away at the end of the day. No computers in room without explicit permission. They are 'checked out' like a library book and returned at specific time. It gives kids feeling of being in control while still allowing us to actually keep control of what's going on. I will peruse the history to see what sites they've visited. Also have passwords to all their accounts. I will only use that in case of emergency--a 'just in case' scenerio.
  6. Every person is the US should have access to internet. The problem lies in that we still need people to design, develop, problem solve, and articulate in multi-sylabic text using one's own intellect. To rely solely on the great grey box has allowed our children's generation to become a-literate. Certainly unschooling has a place in the teaching/learning realm, but to encourage day-long video games is irresponsible parenting. (My boys and DH are die-hard video gamers, so this is in my area of reality.) Learning should be multi-faceted. Tactile manipulatives, old fashioned books, rote memorization, and technology should all be utilized to prepare the kids for what lies ahead. There are so many options available to teach. Why sit the kid in front of the tv all day, every day under the auspices of education?
  7. Our boys want long hair--at least much longer than dad prefers. We came up with a compromise between military "white wall" buzz cut over the ears and the European soccer shaggy cut. The boys must have hair out of eyes, preferably above eyebrows or brushed to side. Back of hair no longer than bottom of shirt collar. Nothing intrinsically wrong with long hair, but it goes against DH's wishes and we get the wrath of the in-laws when they see photos of boys sans the 1950's haircuts. LOL Boys are happy to compromise in lieu of the alternative.
  8. My girls gel back their hair--LOTS of gel!--and put in a pony tail for gymnastics. They can wear metal clips, but prefer not.
  9. One friend was sending vulgar messages, completely out of character for her. After the second I notified her. Her account had been compromised, but was fixed pretty quickly.
  10. We renewed our vows at 5 years. It was card-only. We're considering renewing at 20 years. Only thing we request is the presence (not presents :)) of our family and friends.
  11. I suspect the best thing to happen for this family is to continue the TV program. If art imitates reality, their marriage is far gone. Maybe the money will keep them together for awhile longer. Either way I can't stomach the show. It's like fingernails on a chalkboard.
  12. I find the school's threat to be petty. While said student and parents did agree to follow their regulations, they should have no say over behavior which is legal. Expulsion or suspension is an awful way to end a school year, for both the student and his classmates. If nothing else, the kid should be praised for being honest with his intentions instead of forcing him to lie to get what is rightfully his: the graduation ceremony.
  13. We spend $1700/mo for all groceries, household/beauty items for a family of 7 and two large dogs.
  14. I'm a relaxed parent, and am aware that something 'could' happen...but statistically speaking, probably won't. DDd is more likely to break her arm (again) biking than doing high level gymnastics. DS is more likely to be hit by a car in our alley than abducted by a stranger. I teach them to be cognizant of their surroundings and practice safety, but can't encourage paranoid behavior. Too many children are sheltered from the wonderful things in life because of the fear of something bad happening. If we don't allow our children to grow and make small mistakes while living with us, what will the ramifications be when out on their own and making big decisions for the first time?
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