Why is our generation so stressed out???

[Mommyfaithe]

I realize we are all under a lot of stress, but weren't our grandparents and other ancestors also under tons of stress?? I think about plague and fuedal systems and slavery and no vaccines etc....and I think those generations had to be under much more stress than us...but here we are with all sorts of stress related illnesses...In my own family we are stressed over health issues, financial issues, raising a large family issues etc. and now my older kids are having stress related illnesses such as anxiety and fibromyalgia etc.

 

How does one go about getting past the stress and back into enjoying life as it comes. I am a pretty fly by the seat, take it as it comes kinda gal, and I have to be honest....I am beyond stressed out right now.

 

We have had so much to deal with this year, as has so many of us around here, and I am so desiring a calm normal...or at least not to be in panic mode for a while.

 

So, why is our generation FEELING and physically reacting to stress so much more than past generations? What did they have that we lack??

 

Whatcha think?

Faithe

[Gratia271]

I have been pondering these same things recently. I would love to know the answers to these questions. Lately, I have been so angry with myself for not being able to enjoy what is mine today notwithstanding all of our family's troubles. I want to get beyond stress and anxiety yet have no idea how to combat it. I would love to know what their secret was.... they clearly faced more troubles than I have.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I think our parents and grandparents just kept their stress to themselves. My mom (who is in her mid 80's) had a nervous breakdown due to stress. She told me that her mom had trouble with stress. . .

[Melissa in Australia]

I don't think we are under any less stress. I know my in-laws went through the WW2 in Europe, it has completely stressed out their life, my grandmother went through the depression, she still has scars from the stress, and she was only a child.

 

Just because you are living very stressful, doesn't mean that people in the past weren't. History books don't tell you how stressed people were.

Edited December 2, 2010 by melissaL

[JoyfulMama]

I think one part of it is the decrease in daily physical activity. Physical activity = exercise, which decreases stress.

[Julie in Austin]

I may be wrong about this, but I think we face a lot more decisions--both small and large--and that that leads to stress.

[joannqn]

Two weeks ago, I had my first classic migraine in 13 years. I know they are triggered by extreme levels of stress; and life here as been at extreme levels of stress for the last 6 months or so.

 

I think the answer is simple...do what you can do today and let the rest wait until tomorrow. Don't worry about more than you can realistically handle/solve today. Take one day at a time. And all those other cliches that are easier said than done.

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

Physical inactivity, Standard American Diet...and the Information Age.

 

We are all on TMI overload in our every waking moment.

 

I de-fuzz a little when I go to bed early, take long walks in nature (no signs or billboards), and ration my news intake.

[Kirch]

I think our parents and grandparents just kept their stress to themselves. My mom (who is in her mid 80's) had a nervous breakdown due to stress. She told me that her mom had trouble with stress. . .

 

I think that's true for the previous several generations in the US at least. As far as earlier times, I think most people had so much to do just to survive that they didn't have time to think much about it. But I also don't think there was much "enjoying life as it comes," either. At least not for the common people. You got up, you slogged through a full day of heavy labor, you ate what you could get, and you went to bed. We're so conditioned to feel like life should be mostly pleasant with hopefully few rough spots that it's easy to forget that for hundreds or even thousands of years, it was exactly the opposite for many, many people. The relatively prosperous, healthy, large middle class in America is a very recent phenomenon, historically speaking.

 

And I think that if they *did* have stress-related issues, they would have been understood differently. Something physical, like fibromyalgia, high blood pressure/heart issues--those things would have just been a couple more unexplainable physical illnesses, you know? Or they may have come up with another explanation.

 

As far as the mental issues (i.e., anxiety, mental breakdowns, etc.), I'm sure those were present as well, just not necessarily described the same way or ascribed to the same reasons we give today. Mental illness was certainly present in many forms, and I'd guess that at least in some cases the root cause was stress. Those people might have been described in many different ways--possessed, mad/insane, "not quite right" (as in, "She hasn't been quite right ever since she lost her baby"), the town drunk . . .

[Tutor]

As a soceity, compared to soceities of the past:

 

physically inactive, overweight, lacking in a close knit family - or any support network, bad role models, "Keeping up with the Jones", isolation brought on by tv and computers, desire for things that use to not exist, easier access to 'problems' (porn, online cheating, video game addiction, gambling).

 

In theory, in the past a person would have to actually be:

- physically active and walk down to the salon (Being physically active is a stress relive)

- walk past everyone in the community (Accountability to community - can't hide your problems - your 'support' network knows you 'problem')

 

This... and I also think that with scientific and technological advances that we have deluded ourselves (as a society/ race) that we can and should be able to handle anything... aging, illness, time management, long-distance transportation, communication - we have "answers" for all of these (pills, vitamins, surgeries, calendars, clocks, cars, planes, telephones, email, radio, television) so we should be able to handle whatever life throws at us, right?

 

I think past generations may have been more accepting of their lack of ability to control so learned better coping skills.

 

They did have stresses, however... many. We have to be careful (I am speaking to myself here) not to hold up the past as "the good old days." There are pros and cons to every age.

[Littlemother]

Well, one reason is because back then there weren't any computors or vaccums to stop working.

[Gratia271]

I think past generations may have been more accepting of their lack of ability to control so learned better coping skills.

 

 

Excellent point.

[Jenny in GA]

Physical inactivity, Standard American Diet...and the Information Age.

 

We are all on TMI overload in our every waking moment.

 

I de-fuzz a little when I go to bed early, take long walks in nature (no signs or billboards), and ration my news intake.

 

:iagree:

Yup. I agree completely.

[catalinakel]

Physical inactivity, Standard American Diet...and the Information Age.

 

We are all on TMI overload in our every waking moment.

 

I de-fuzz a little when I go to bed early, take long walks in nature (no signs or billboards), and ration my news intake.

 

This. And perhaps our forebearers had a stronger faith in God than many today. All of our gadgtry and successes give a false sense of independence, and invincibility. Faith in ourselves for rescue leads to much stress. My hope is in God alone. Only as I rest in this am I at peace.

[KidsHappen]

IMO it is because we have not evolved to live in our current civilization. One small example, people two or three hundred years ago didn't have ADD because they were never put into a situation that required them to sit still and pay attention for long periods of time. Children were pretty much free to run about outdoors all day. People weren't depressed because they were up to the demands of their lives, etc.

[MamaBearTeacher]

I agree with everything everyone said. I think a lot of our modern life is extremely stressful: driving a car on a highway, using a computer, noise from machines in the house and outside. I think also that we pressure ourselves to use time wisely and we are judged for how we use our time and that makes it hard to just be. Everything is so much more complicated. Anything you do requires so many steps, so much planning nowadays. We use our brains a lot more than our bodies! For the most part, we have way more control over our lives today and it leaves us with a greater feeling of responsibility. People were more spiritual and closer to God in the past too.

 

I think there was stress in the past - long days of physical labor, np modern conveniences, difficult living conditions, death more likely. Maybe people felt their problems were less in their control and just accepted them.

[Peela]

The thing with modern stress is that it is so nepharious and ubiquitous...how many of us wake up with clenched guts in the mornings and don't even know why? Our stress is not the stress of being chased by a tiger...and when we escape safely, the stress relaxes. We are built to handle that sort of stess. Our stress is so habitual, and never really goes away...we are in constant stress- so when we meet other people, they are in constant stress, so it is somewhat normal and people barely even realise we are not meant to live like this.

 

All the modern conveniences we have are meant to give us more time but we fill up all our empty time with more busy-ness. Our grandparents could sit on the porch for a couple of hours in the evening and talk. They had social networks. They would talk to the neighbours. People werent expected to be busy all the time, to be productive all the time. Time was not so sped up...it was slower. Partly because it took longer to do things because there werent the modern "conveniences". We expect ourselves to do so much, to pack so much into our days. We value ourselves through our productivity, through what we do, rather than inherently.

 

We have filled in all the empty spaces in our lives. The spaces where people used to connect, celebrate, hang out, chat, relax.

Also...we are trained to worship consumerism. Shopping is considered leisure now. We fill our empty times, the times when we could stop and smell the roses, with consumerism.

 

I have just come back from Bali. If you have ever been to Bali, you would know that the Balinese are an inherently happy culture. As they say themselves...often they dont know where their next meal is coming from- there is a lot of poverty there- but they are happy anyway. That is part of the attraction of going to Bali...they are infectiously happy- they laugh easily. It's funny...a days work to a Balinese will generally involve a lot of not doing much. A lot of patiently waiting. We in the West are not so happy yet we have so much and are so busy all the time, chasing happiness around the next corner but never quite getting there. We forget we are human Beings, not human Doings.

 

We just lost the balance. We are capable of finding it again, though, but we have to drop out of mainstream culture to do so.

[Night Elf]

My mom told me that people, at least in her family, just didn't talk about bad things. She always told me while I was growing up that I should never discuss problems with other people because they have their own to deal with.

[Margaret in GA]

Guilt. I think that because we have too much information at our disposal, we also guilt ridden about our circumstances, our kids' performance, our health... you name it. We believe ourselves to be in control in a way that is unique to our generation. My mom wasn't nearly as worried as I am about my kids. I agree with the poster that said it's a technological thing- driving is way scarier than it was for my grandparents, drugs are more dangerous. It can drive a person crazy feeling guilty about not doing the things they think they should do to control the various situations life throws at them.

Diet or you'll have excess belly fat and get cancer. Turn off the TV or your kids will have ADHD. Don't work outside the home or your latch key kids will do drugs. Don't vaccinate or your kids will get Autism. Buy organic or you will be needlessly exposing your family to harmful chemicals. Attend church faithfully every week or your family will disintegrate. Don't let your teens drive or they will die. The list goes on and on

[jld]

My mom told me that people, at least in her family, just didn't talk about bad things. She always told me while I was growing up that I should never discuss problems with other people because they have their own to deal with.

 

I think this is true in a lot of families. People were, and are, very concerned about their image, and would rather look good than actually feel good.

[UmMusa]

Haven't read replies, but I think it's a detachment from the natural flow of life. Being more in nature, raising some of your own food, having low lights at night, not having internet at 2am if you wake up and can't sleep.

[Mejane]

:iagree:w/ this:

 

I think our parents and grandparents just kept their stress to themselves.

 

this:

 

...and the Information Age.

 

 

 

and this:

 

I think it's a detachment from the natural flow of life.

 

as well as all of Peela's post.

[Sophia]

I think it's because we aren't made of "tough stuff" anymore. We're, essentially, a bunch of whimps. Truly. We whine and complain about EVERYTHING instead of just bucking up and dealing with it. Somewhere along the line we forgot how to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps and get on with things. We think someone should be pampering us and making life easy for us. Why we think this, I don't know. Have you ever seen the Geico "drill sergeant therapist" commercial? I think there's something to be learned from that commercial. (It's my all-time favorite commercial!) :lol:

 

 

 

So there's my two cents.

 

I'm going to go with this.

When I think of my grandmother and my mil, who were both the same age (b. 1924), I remember how incredibly strong they were, and how quiet they were about it, too.

Although they both faced so many trials, it always impressed me how matter of fact they were about it.

 

They moved on, but weren't bitter (how did they manage that?)

 

When each one faced her impending death, they were both so ...stoic.

How ironic that some of their children go into mini breakdowns over routine tests. In fact, my grandma was one of the few who didn't flip when she found out about my homebirths~ she just shrugged and said that's where she had

hers, lol.

They were sweet ladies, so I think they would try to understand what I would call a stressful day, but I think they would be muttering, "Oh honey, you have no idea."

Edited December 3, 2010 by Sophia
sp

[source of joy]

I don't think we are under any less stress. I know my in-laws went through the WW2 in Europe, it has completely stressed out their life, my grandmother went through the depression, she still has scars from the stress, and she was only a child.

 

Just because you are living very stressful, doesn't mean that people in the past weren't. History books don't tell you how stressed people were.

 

WSS.

 

I also suffer from fibromyalgia...I'm still mourning my losses(including exercise...it takes 24-36 hr. longer for people with fibromyalgia to recuperate from severe exertion. I didn't know this so I overdid it and now I have one more loss...at least for now, to deal with). My specialist mentioned to us that during the fighting in the trenches, a lot of soldiers became useless due to their stress levels and he says that now they know that a lot of them were suffering from fibromyalgia. There seemed nothing wrong with them(although today at least there are blood markers for it) but they had the symptoms of fibromyalgia...I guess we didn't know all the suffering that happened...maybe a lot of it happened in silence.

[mcconnellboys]

I think a lot of the same sorts of things still happened, but news of it didn't carry as fast - at least to more rural, isolated areas. People could stay away from news by staying away from neighbors or town, too, LOL.... Information was not via satellite and instantaneous, even for the most gruesome of occurrences.

 

I think our fast paced, have it all now, drive-through lifestyles also contribute greatly to our stress levels.

 

And I think our overall poor nutrition also contributes to stress on our bodies....

[Carol in Cal.]

I think that part of it is just keeping up appearances.

 

In the 30's there were a lot of broken homes and a lot of intact miserable ones, and people covered up for family members a great deal. That is far less true now, what with the 'don't enable him' mentality that has caught on so strongly.

 

I also think that although we don't have the stress of relentless pressure toward conformity, there is an opposing stress that is also quite significant--the stress of having many, many choices all the darn time. It seems like there is so little to count on from a societal standpoint, and that means that people are always questioning themselves right and left.

 

I am not very stress prone anymore, and I think it's because of my Faith. Not that I didn't have faith in my 20's, but I had not had the practice in exercising it toward stressful situations then.

[Hillary in KS]

I think it's because we aren't made of "tough stuff" anymore. We're, essentially, a bunch of whimps. Truly. We whine and complain about EVERYTHING instead of just bucking up and dealing with it. Somewhere along the line we forgot how to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps and get on with things. We think someone should be pampering us and making life easy for us. Why we think this, I don't know. Have you ever seen the Geico "drill sergeant therapist" commercial? I think there's something to be learned from that commercial. (It's my all-time favorite commercial!) :lol:

 

 

So there's my two cents.

 

:iagree:

[Liz CA]

 

All the modern conveniences we have are meant to give us more time but we fill up all our empty time with more busy-ness. Our grandparents could sit on the porch for a couple of hours in the evening and talk. They had social networks. They would talk to the neighbours. People werent expected to be busy all the time, to be productive all the time. Time was not so sped up...it was slower. Partly because it took longer to do things because there werent the modern "conveniences". We expect ourselves to do so much, to pack so much into our days. We value ourselves through our productivity, through what we do, rather than inherently.

 

 

 

So true! My grandmother never sat in a car eating lunch and swilling coffee. She took her lunch at home, sitting at a nicely set table. Food was prepared at home and not purchased.

I am one of the lucky ones who does not have a stressful job at least. I usually can eat at my desk whatever I brought from home if I did not eat lunch at home.

Many of us are not establishing healthy routines anymore. Taking meals together and sharing our lives, talking to one another.

We are too busy checking voicemail on the landline, voicemail on the cell, e-mail, fax machines and who knows what else. What for? Some piece of information that brings us what exactly?

 

Edited December 3, 2010 by Liz CA

[Liz CA]

Living life for a while has a way of teaching us what is important.

[Laura Corin]

I think that we have excessively high expectations for happiness and ease. Then we get stressed when real life doesn't live up to that. 'Pursuit of happiness....?' Give me uneventful, good enough, not too bad, okay....

 

Laura

[Joyofsixreboot]

According to my father (83 yo) people today:

 

worry too much about what others think.

believe life isn't supposed to be hard/sad/unexpected and it is.

 

I would add people believe what they see on TV and in movies is real life (or at least how it's supposed to be.)

[Ibbygirl]

I think our parents and grandparents just kept their stress to themselves. My mom (who is in her mid 80's) had a nervous breakdown due to stress. She told me that her mom had trouble with stress. . .

 

I always think of the character of Dame Van Winkle in Washington Irving's story and how the author paints her as a shrew, but when you read the details of her life with Rip and how her house was dilapidated, how he wouldn't tend to the farm, how the kids were all wild and she would scream at Rip trying to get him to work on the farm and he wouldn't. I think she is unjustly demonized. She is a portrait of a stressed out woman who is stuck in a situation that has her completely overwhelmed and she has no help from her mate. She ultimately dies from a burst blood vessel! I know that her character is fictitious, but I wouldn't be surprised if Washington Irving had met some women like that in his time. Stuck in a life with no recourse for any way out and wondering what will become of her and her children. I honestly feel sorry for Dame Van Winkle. I'm sure under that kind of stress any woman would become a shrew. And everyone hated her because her husband was a friendly guy so they figured that she was to blame somehow. Sucks to be her.

[Laurie4b]

I think there are a lot of things that contribute to stress for us. I've read some but not all of the posts. Here are my thoughts:

 

1. Easier connection over long distances through easy travel and the computer tear at our deep connections at home. When I was growing up, I knew no one who flew as part of his job. The back-and-forth nature of this is stressful on a family due to the interruption of routine. The internet gives us the opportunity to work where we don't live--or simply to work at home. That has its plus side, but a huge minus side is the computer blurs the boundaries between work and home. We get no "rest" from work.

 

2. We are overwhelmed with information. Some of that info is scary. We know of every kidnapping, etc. that happens in the country. That impacts our perception of our safety.

 

3. Technological developments give us more to do at night, tempting us to stay up late. I'm old enough to remember when the TV pretty much cut off from midnight to 7:00 am. So if you were tempted to stay up too late, it was not to watch something or surf the net. In addition, all the lights in our homes (the little dot of light on our computers, the lights on our alarms, etc.) affect our sleep.

 

4. Cell phones keep us in constant contact with people. We can't get away really. There are no spaces of rest from the demands of others.

 

5. Credit cards: our parents did not start out their lives with credit cards. They paid for everything in cash. Much harder to get into debt that way.

 

6. Home mortgages used to be able to be paid on one income. Sometime in the late 60's or 70's maybe, a wife's income was able to be counted in a couple's ability to pay a mortgage. Prior to that, it wasn't counted in case she got pregnant and that income stopped. While that is a step forward for equality for women, it also led to consumers having more income to pay for a house and I believe the market then reacted to that extra income and housing went up. Now it is very difficult to live on one income. Then, it was commonplace.

 

7. Physical exercise was part of the jobs of many; they didn't have to " artificially" exercise.

 

8. There was more face-to-face contact. Moms didn't interact over the internet; they interacted over coffee. In our neighborhood growing up, most of the moms were at home and so were their kids. We played baseball, football, etc. *in the neighborhood* instead of needing to be hauled around for a bunch of extra-curricular activities. Life was more integrated as a result.

[justamouse]

The thing with modern stress is that it is so nepharious and ubiquitous...how many of us wake up with clenched guts in the mornings and don't even know why? Our stress is not the stress of being chased by a tiger...and when we escape safely, the stress relaxes. We are built to handle that sort of stess. Our stress is so habitual, and never really goes away...we are in constant stress- so when we meet other people, they are in constant stress, so it is somewhat normal and people barely even realise we are not meant to live like this.

 

All the modern conveniences we have are meant to give us more time but we fill up all our empty time with more busy-ness. Our grandparents could sit on the porch for a couple of hours in the evening and talk. They had social networks. They would talk to the neighbours. People werent expected to be busy all the time, to be productive all the time. Time was not so sped up...it was slower. Partly because it took longer to do things because there werent the modern "conveniences". We expect ourselves to do so much, to pack so much into our days. We value ourselves through our productivity, through what we do, rather than inherently.

 

We have filled in all the empty spaces in our lives. The spaces where people used to connect, celebrate, hang out, chat, relax.

Also...we are trained to worship consumerism. Shopping is considered leisure now. We fill our empty times, the times when we could stop and smell the roses, with consumerism.

 

I have just come back from Bali. If you have ever been to Bali, you would know that the Balinese are an inherently happy culture. As they say themselves...often they dont know where their next meal is coming from- there is a lot of poverty there- but they are happy anyway. That is part of the attraction of going to Bali...they are infectiously happy- they laugh easily. It's funny...a days work to a Balinese will generally involve a lot of not doing much. A lot of patiently waiting. We in the West are not so happy yet we have so much and are so busy all the time, chasing happiness around the next corner but never quite getting there. We forget we are human Beings, not human Doings.

 

We just lost the balance. We are capable of finding it again, though, but we have to drop out of mainstream culture to do so.

 

What Peela said, 1000%

 

Let me tell you, I am not a whiner, neither is my DH. But we *never* have time off. never. It would take me weeks to decompress. Dh probably more.

 

And to be made to feel guilty BECAUSE we feel this way? Fugheddaboutit. THAT is WHY people are stressed. Because they can't have an unproductive moment without being judged.

 

What Laurie4b said, too, those things are real.

 

And, something I've learned since living in a really old house (200 years) I walk a LOT in this house. Up and down stairs, forward to back all day long. It's something you just have to suck up-going up and down stars a gazillion times a day. What I'm saying is that we live differently now. Houses are built for ease of living, not practicality (this house is so practical it's glorious-small things you never thought about, the old timers did). I think physical activity was just more a part of everyone's life-even in their houses. Walking to town to get what you want, to go shopping, to visit.

Edited December 3, 2010 by justamouse

[Jean in Wisc]

I often think of my parents and grandparents generation.

 

When it snowed, they shoveled--mom in her rubber overshoes and wool (read non-windproof) coat, nothing on her legs...nothing.

 

They woke up and stoked the stove. No electricity. There was no furnace to kick in when the temps dipped too low like I have.

 

When mom's grandpa had heat stroke, he lived the rest of his life in bed. Grandma worked (did she do laundry? can't recall) to keep the kids fed and clothed (not too many pairs of anything). People got sick and lived with it if it didn't kill them. Lots of families lived with a small family cemetery on their land.

 

Farming was grunt-labor.

 

Raising children was just as exhausting as it is today--only they had more physical labor to go with it and fewer medical aids to get them through. Some parents treated their children with kindness; some were brutal.

 

When they finally replaced the horses for a car, they still had to bundle up and try to keep warm--or try to keep cool depending on the season.

 

Life was tough--perhaps in a different way than our computer, cell phone, hot showers world, but reality was that they were not going to be able to "have it all"...but then they all saw other folks living it up with money and maids...so they, too, had a wish list they would never fill--not so different from us.

 

Some people worked hard. Some didn't.

 

For my grandpa, he thought it was a better life here in the U.S. than he would have had in the old country...but then he lost his farm in the depression. He visited his parents before the war, returned just in time to get out of Germany before Hitler began to march, and didn't hear that his parents had died until after the war. His son went off to war and got 2 purple hearts. Grandma's hair went from black to gray during the war years.

 

They had stress. They didn't always cope. Some celebrated life, found meaning in their faith, and loved. Others were bitter and angry. Some kept their faith and found some peace. Others went crazy and fell apart. Some remained kind. Others became mean.

 

Have you ever read Rolvaag's Giants in the Earth? A worthy read.

 

I think people are people. We are not so much different from our ancestors as we think.

 

So then the next question is, how do we find serenity? I do think there is another thread discussing that, right? IMO, it is a path we take made up of choices. Sometimes the path is dark; other times not so much. We learn to live, love, and celebrate as we grow and mature.

 

Ah...no time to continue. Good conversation--

 

Jean

[UnsinkableKristen]

 

Some people worked hard. Some didn't.

 

They had stress. They didn't always cope. Some celebrated life, found meaning in their faith, and loved. Others were bitter and angry. Some kept their faith and found some peace. Others went crazy and fell apart. Some remained kind. Others became mean.

 

Jean

 

 

This exactly. I think that this applies to today as well. The stressors of every generation will be different. We have an overload of technology in our generation, but we don't have to spend every pregnancy with the knowledge that that we may very likely die.

 

You deal with what your lot in life is no matter what. Sometimes you deal with it well, sometimes you don't and I think it matters less what you have to deal with than what kind of person you are at your core.

[LibraryLover]

I think that we have excessively high expectations for happiness and ease. Then we get stressed when real life doesn't live up to that. 'Pursuit of happiness....?' Give me uneventful, good enough, not too bad, okay....

 

Laura

 

 

Bingo.

 

This is what I think.

 

People have far greater expectations than one nervous system can handle.

[Stacia]

I think many of the answers are on target.

 

Stressors for today's world, imo, include:

* media overload (electronics obsessions from too much computer time to watching too much tv, always having an iPod plugged in or the radio/cd on in the car, etc...; media outlets have devolved to sensationalistic stories rather than actual news much of the time; everthing from self-psychoanalysis to home medical diagnosis available w/ a quick google search, etc...)

* noise (I strongly believe the unending noise we endure is not good for us, from the constant hum of all our electrical appliances to traffic, sirens, airplanes, loudspeakers/music in stores, etc...; most of us rarely experience an extended [or any] period of time w/out noise or w/ just natural noises [birds, wind, ...])

* too many activities

* trying to do more things in less time (rather than doing fewer things in more time)/multi-tasking

* consumeristic culture (must have more to be more; your child needs ortho work to have a Hollywood-perfect smile vs. for practical reasons like fixing an overbite; buying homes/cars/electronics that provide more than we 'need' & result in more choices/responsibilites/decisions needed from us; etc...)

* often having few or no deep relationships w/ others or fractured relationships because many are too busy to invest time in friendship

* throw-away culture (own more cheaply-made items that are easy/cheap to replace vs. fewer well-made items that you would take care of/repair if needed)

* fast food/convenience overload (kind of goes back to the doing more things in less time, but perhaps eating shouldn't be something you do like that...)

[LibraryLover]

I also think each new generation tries to figure out ways they have it worse than the previous generation. "Oh, yeah, you had a cold? Well, *I* alomst died when I had a cold" Or, "When my mother had a cold, she took to her bed. When I have a cold, I suck it up and go about my day. I am too busy to take a day off and baby myself the way she did."

 

Honestly, a human nervous system is going to respond on some level, and it doesn't know geological time from bupkis. It might be sabertooths at the mouth of the cave at midnight, or it might be Salon.com at 2 am. It might be the fight you had with your partner, or it might be that the nuts and berries are running low and you have to move again.

Edited December 3, 2010 by LibraryLover

[cin]

I read somewhere, don't remember where, of course, but they were working on a study that essentially said that technology has advanced at such a rate that we, as humans, have not had time to evolve or adapt to it.

 

Technology has come so far in the past 50 years, which is really only 1-2 generations. As opposed to the previous 1,000 years of technological advances and the generations it covered. People had time to adjust to the 'stuff' of their generation, with few changes. I know myself, transistor radios to cassette tapes, to CD's and now MP3s. B&W portable TVs, color large TVs, Big Screen TVs, Plasma, and now HD. Lots of changes, which include spending $$$$ (cuz nobody has parts to fix the older stuff!).

 

And while I don't think technology is the ONLY reason for our stress, I'm sure it's a strong contributor, as we, ourselves, try to adapt to the changes that are CONSTANTLY occuring around us.

 

I somemtimes wish my only concern was whether or not to try a different type of bean seed. And which fabric would DD like best for her dress, the pink calico or the red one?

[LibraryLover]

I somemtimes wish my only concern was whether or not to try a different type of bean seed. And which fabric would DD like best for her dress, the pink calico or the red one?

 

In between worrying about crop failure and First Nation unrest, right?

[Tammyla]

Stress has been around forever, but today there is almost no down time. I've grown to detest the word multitasking.

[JumpedIntoTheDeepEndFirst]

As many here have mentioned in previous posts...the information age.

 

I've read many articles about how we are bombarded by so much information in so many forms daily. As a result, we feel to have to make constant decisions related to this information which leads to a lack of mental rest.

[pqr]

Why is our generation so stressed out??? ------because we exchanged a stiff upper lip for a quivering font or excuses and complaints. The more one whines the more stressed one becomes. We need to grow up, change those things we can and live with those we cannot.

 

The explosion in therapists, counselors and others who "will help you" has resulted in the mental equivalent of the litigious society caused by too many lawyers. I do not say that some are not helped by therapists but they are certainly not needed on the scale we now see. If you expect a person or a people to be overly stressed or that they will have psychological issues resulting from living in today’s society…then…. voila you will see it. People will generally rise or FALL to expectations and our society today seems to expect people to be overly stressed and “fragile.” If you offer a swift kick in the rear and the expectation that people grow up you will also see that, at least in the case of the majority of people (There are some who genuinely can not cut it and need help).

 

In short as a society we need to stop coddling people.

 

That being said there are, in times of economic hardship great stresses on people, supporting a family etc, but high levels of stress in today’s society predate the current crisis. I remember the high school I attended having a counselor (in high school!!! Where my only real concerns were if %%%% would go out with me and keeping my grades up), She did have a nice jar of sweets on her desk and while she was very pleasant but really taxpayer $$ on a counselor (mental not guidance) in an upper middle class high school---self licking ice cream cone and one that taught students that they were “fragile.” Is it any wonder that these same students and their generation are now “stressed”?

 

 

Strongly agreeing with Kinsa and she is correct this is a great commercial:

 

 

Edited December 3, 2010 by pqr

[LidiyaDawn]

So true! My grandmother never sat in a car eating lunch and swilling coffee. She took her lunch at home, sitting at a nicely set table. Food was prepared at home and not purchased.

 

It's not just the adults either - I remember walking home for lunch when I was in elementary school... we had an hour. Soup, stew, supper leftovers, etc. Walking back again after.

 

The elementary school behind our house gives the kids 20 minutes. :001_huh:

[Elaine]

I think it's because we aren't made of "tough stuff" anymore. We're, essentially, a bunch of whimps. Truly. We whine and complain about EVERYTHING instead of just bucking up and dealing with it. Somewhere along the line we forgot how to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps and get on with things. We think someone should be pampering us and making life easy for us. Why we think this, I don't know. Have you ever seen the Geico "drill sergeant therapist" commercial? I think there's something to be learned from that commercial. (It's my all-time favorite commercial!) :lol:

 

 

 

So there's my two cents.

 

Love ya, girl!:iagree:

 

 

 

*snicker* jackwagon *snicker*

[cathmom]

It's not just the adults either - I remember walking home for lunch when I was in elementary school... we had an hour. Soup, stew, supper leftovers, etc. Walking back again after.

 

The elementary school behind our house gives the kids 20 minutes. :001_huh:

 

I had an hour in elementary school too. 30 minutes to eat, 30 minutes on the playground. The teachers would go out to lunch together because the school had lunch aides.

 

When my oldest was in school in 1st grade, they got 20 minutes, and in that time, they had to walk to the cafeteria, get their lunches, and walk back to their room to eat, and the teacher had to stay with them, so she didn't get a break. He would have like 2 minutes to actually eat his lunch! Even if a kid brought his lunch, he still had to walk to the cafeteria, so it didn't help any.

[Garga]

Not being snarky, but how do we know we have more stress now?

 

It sort of reminds me of that old gem about the person complaining about the youth of today and how they're all lazy and whiny, blah, blah, blah, and as you read the quote you're thinking, "Hey this guy is right!" but then you find out that the quote is from Socrates or Plato or whomever (apparently, historians aren't sure who really said it.) And then you realize that each generation thinks the next one is lazy and whiny, etc, and have been thinking so for thousands of years.

 

We assume things about the past generations or the current younger generation that might not be true.

 

For example, when you think of life of the prairie, you know it was hard, but you figure that the people were strong and worked through it. But it turns out that the divorce rate on the prairie was astronomically high because it was just so tough on the women. Instead of the woman happily humming to themselves in their peaceful homes by the fireplace sewing shirts, they were miserable and ended up divorcing their husbands and going back east. Sounds like they were pretty stressed, but we picture them all being stoic and sturdy.

 

 

So I think it's valuable to talk about the very real stress that we have that is different from the past (info overload, people move away from each other, technology, etc), but I think we might be inaccurate to say we have more stress than previous generations. I think it's just different causes of stress.

Edited December 4, 2010 by Garga

[Bev in B'ville]

Agreeing with you, PQR. As a psychologist, I think we are living in the most narcissistic society ever. One has only to turn on their television to see the numerous reality shows to get an example of this. Celebrities are created out of nothing (no discernible talent whatsoever - cough, cough, Paris Hilton, Khardasians, Jersey shore, etc. - cough cough).

 

Does anyone seriously believe we have it worse than our ancestors? We haven't lived through a World War (yet) or a Great Depression, or the Spanish Flu of 1918 (and those are just the recent things). Holy cow. Put on your big girl panties and buck up (As a psychologist, I've always wanted to say that). Love the drill sergeant commercial. It's every psychologists fantasy to say that to a client.

 

Since when did we become a nation (or world) of "it's all about me"?

[Karenciavo]

Since when did we become a nation (or world) of "it's all about me"?

 

I blame Marlo Thomas :lol: