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Bev in B'ville

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  1. I agree that it's a good time to do a family visit as long as the parent does not go with their child into the interview or wait outside of the interview. Spending time on the campus is great! However, not one of my dd's interviews thus far has been on a campus. They've all taken place away from the campus and are usually in the evening.
  2. That's fantastic Jean. Does he know which one he'll accept?
  3. Between you and Jane you've managed to put very succinctly what I've been floundering around with here.
  4. Yes, I've made sure that I stayed out of the college application process as much as possible. Dd picked the colleges she wanted to apply to, completed the applications (and accompanying essays). I did my part with transcripts and school counselor letters and such, but I really feel this is her journey to make. Thanks for helping me solidify my decision on whether to go or not. Edited: I just informed my dd that I wouldn't be going with her to the interview. She actually thanked me for not being "one of those helicopter moms." LOL!
  5. I can see where if dd's interview was on a campus I haven't seen, then I probably would go with her. However, none of her previous interviews have yet to be held at the actual school. One was in a private meeting room in an emergency room (the interviewer was a doctor), the second interview was in a restaurant and now the third will be at person's house (where there will be multiple interviewers and multiple kids present). I drove dd to the first interview and sat in the ER waiting room, but I have to say I felt really stupid being there and the doctor was somewhat surprised, too. The interview at the restaurant I did not drive dd to. I think I might have felt like a stalker sitting at a nearby table. I definitely don't feel comfortable going into someone's private home uninvited so I'm leaning towards letting dd drive herself for the third interview. There should be several cars parked out front as there will be five interviewers and several interviewees. The interview is only scheduled to last fifteen minutes. I'll just have dd text me when she arrives and when she leaves, I think. Next month, we do have a scholarship interview full weekend with another school and the invitation specifically invites parents, so that one I'll definitely attend. However, if the invitation didn't specifically include my dh and I, I would be more wary and look at it more closely before deciding to attend. :confused:
  6. My dd has a scholarship intervew Tuesday and I plan on letting her drive herself. My understanding is that they don't want to talk to me, just my dd. I'm not trying to cut the apron strings and run or anything, but I also don't want to be a mom who's hanging out with no real purpose. If my dd didn't have a driver's license already then of course I would drive her, but I don't want to be perceived as "one of those moms" who can't let go and let the young adult handle something like this on their own or seem over eager. Will my presence make a difference (good or bad)? Advice from BT/DT parents? Did you go and if so, why? Why not?
  7. Thank you very, very much for your kind words in the Public Assistance thread. It means so much to me that people like you and a few others don't mind putting themselves out there in a hostile environment (i.e. this very liberal board).

  8. Thank you for your support on the Public Assistance thread. It means a lot, especially on this very liberal leaning board.

  9. Everytime someone does something utterly stupid, someone, somewhere utters "There should be a law against that..." The reality is that stupidity cannot be legislated. New laws simply mean people find new ways to get around them, sometimes to their own (or others) detriment. Darwin at work.....
  10. There were citizens of our great country who, after Obama was elected, stated that they could now quit their jobs because Obama and the gov't would take care of them. :001_huh: Out of coffee! National crisis for sure (at least in my house). :lol:
  11. The bottom line in this whole discussion is accountability. We raise our children (at least, most of us do) holding them accountable for their choices and actions. Good choices/actions (e.g. an 'A' on a test) ---> Good consequences (e.g. more playtime or a special dessert, etc.) Bad choices/actions (e.g. an 'F' on a test) ---> Bad consequences (e.g. less play time, no dessert, no video grames, etc.) However, adults seem to get a pass on this and the logic fails. Adults make bad decisions, but they're not held accountable. For example, people who bought homes they couldn't afford and then the gov't bailed them out. People who refuse to better themselves so they can get a decent job and be contributing members of society; gov't gives them money to live on. Where's the logic? Since when do we not hold adults accountable for their actions? Since when did we say "It's okay that you made bad choices in your life, here's some money." I don't lament having public assistance. However, it should be temporary, it should have more oversight so that the people receiving it spend it wisely (not on flat screen TV's or iPhones, etc.) and continued assistance should be contingent on receiving job training of some sorts (college, tech school or OJT) not necessarily provided by the gov't.
  12. You should take care not to label an entire group based on a few instances. My dh and I have never cheated on our taxes, ever. We don't know anyone who has cheated. Most pay their taxes.
  13. If you're worried about people cheating the tax system (and people of all income levels do this), then it's the tax system in this country that needs revamped, not income redistribution. The Fair Tax method, for example, would tax people only on what they spend with tax credits going towards people in certain groups. The wealthy, by definition, would end up being taxed more because they spend more. Business people and entrepreneurs drive the economy because their businesses provide the jobs (duh!). If they don't have the income resources to support their businesses and/or expand (in order to hire more people), then they go out of business or move their businesses to a country that's more tax friendly to them. So, without those businesses there would be no jobs for low-wage workers. Watch Illinois this next year. Because of the tax hike implemented you will see businesses leaving that state to go to states that are more tax friendly and those jobs will also leave Illinois. It's going to be a perfect case-study of what happens when taxes are raised too high.
  14. Only .001% of people in the upper income class inheritied their wealth. As to your second assertion that people just got "lucky" with their investments. First, they had to have worked to get the money to invest in the first place. Second, they didn't just haphazardly or blindly invest their money. They did their research. In other words, they spent time and energy looking into the investment and decided it was worth the risk. As to your third point, that people can't afford college, both my dh and I were in that class of people. Without hard work on both our parts neither of us would have gone to college (see my reply above for more details on our backgrounds). Both my dh and I give back to our community. However, I would very much prefer that the gov't not take my money and give it indiscriminantly to people. I would like to have a say so in how it's spent. That's one of the reasons I think private charity is a much better option. All communities do not have the same needs and only the people in the community know what they need and how best to help. I don't think one approach to all problems (i.e. giving money willy-nilly) is helpful in the least.
  15. I get so tired of hearing people use their socio-economic status to perpetuate their state of living. The whole 'woe is me, I was born poor...never had the opportunities that others had to go to college because no one would pay for it' just doesn't fly with me. I call BS on that attitude. Both my dh and I were poor growing up. My dh was the oldest of three and was babysitting his siblings overnight when he was just six years old while his mother went to one of her three jobs. She was on welfare at some points in their lives. His mother made sure education was a priority in their lives, though. My dh worked hard in school, ended up the valedictorian and won a scholarship to college because he worked hard. He didn't sit back and wait for gov't or anyone else to hand him something. I was in the same boat with my family. I chose the military option. I was in the reserve for eight years and they paid for my college while I was in the reserve. I worked full-time to pay my living expenses while going to college. At Christmas time I worked more than one job so I could have a bit more money (for things like textbooks). It took me longer than the standard four years to graduate because I couldn't always take a full load of classes, but I did it. Was it easy? Absolutely not. Too many people in gov't programs expect someone else to get them out of it. They need to put on their big girl panties and do it themselves. Problem is, too often it involves hard work beyond what a person is willing to do. And, as far as income equalization. I worked very, very hard to be where I am today as has my husband. I absolutely abhore the idea that someone would take my paycheck and give it to someone sitting on their a$$ at home because it's only "fair." When income equalization occurs what you'll see is that those who previously worked hard to earn their incomes and enjoy the benefits will simply stop working hard. Why should a person work hard when their neighbor gets the same amount of money for flipping burgers? Productivity and ingenuity will disintegrate. Those who are willing to work hard and make sacrifices to get ahead shouldn't be punished for their effort. If a person is unhappy with their standard of living, then they should get off their a$$ and do something about it rather than waiting for someone to hand it to them on a silver platter. Yes, I know...getting on my own flame retardant suit.
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