Liz CA Posted May 6, 2017 Share Posted May 6, 2017 What a difficult road to travel. Once he is stabilized and you can breathe again, you may become angry or acknowledge the fear and pain he caused with this. You mentioned before you have nobody IRL to talk to because nobody knows. I hope you have found someone to confide in, a safe and supportive person. If not, I'd consider a few counseling sessions. Don't stuff it too deep. You have a right to your own emotions as well for your own mental health and in order to help the kids through this. Glad to hear he did a 180 and things are looking better. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plink Posted May 6, 2017 Share Posted May 6, 2017 Might it be a good time to get him to sign some documents, consent forms, or various things? (Such as something that will allow you to have access to more information on his health, or dividing up money access and limiting his scope for damage, or anything.) This bears repeating. You need to be able to: Speak with his doctors including the local hospital Interact with his psychiatrist and other specialists Have your name on house and car titles Have full access to bank accounts Set up yourself as his Power of Attorney Consider removing his name from anything fully paid off so that future debts (may) not endanger your vehicles etc. Place important documents in a safe deposit box so that he won't have easy access to them and you can reach them even if things take another turn. Make sure you have full access to insurance, utilities, passwords to online accounts, etc. 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matrips Posted May 6, 2017 Share Posted May 6, 2017 Still praying for you Moonhawk, and glad to hear things are moving in a forward direction. You must be exhausted with the strain. This link is about bipolar treatment contracts, written when a loved one is stable. It appears to be written by a women with bipolar and it sounds like these contracts are not uncommon. They have some samples. http://www.bipolar-lives.com/bipolar-treatment-contract.html 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IfIOnly Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 Still praying for you Moonhawk, and glad to hear things are moving in a forward direction. You must be exhausted with the strain. This link is about bipolar treatment contracts, written when a loved one is stable. It appears to be written by a women with bipolar and it sounds like these contracts are not uncommon. They have some samples. http://www.bipolar-lives.com/bipolar-treatment-contract.html This sounds like a great resource for the OP. The sample contract seems overly detailed and surprising, but I know next to nothing about bipolar. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 Continuing to pray for your family! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonhawk Posted May 8, 2017 Share Posted May 8, 2017 Continuing to pray for your family! Thank you! Much appreciated, much needed. The roller coaster is still...roller coaster-y. Nothing really new, though: same cartoons, different days. 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted May 8, 2017 Share Posted May 8, 2017 Thanks for checking in Moonhawk, I've been thinking about you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneStepAtATime Posted May 8, 2017 Share Posted May 8, 2017 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Still hoping and praying for better days for you and your family. Sending prayers and good vibes and positive thoughts your way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers this morning! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonhawk Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers this morning! Thank you, so so much. The light switch has flipped again, texting has resumed. We made some progress last night, in that it was the first time he acknowledged he's bipolar and actually needs medical help. But, still the texting. I caught him making plans for tonight, when confronted on it (iow, when I blew up, not usually my MO) he seemed to cow to me, but still hasn't officially cancelled. And even if he does, I don't want to monitor him every second and prevent him from going out later. It's hopeless, the change can't be from me. If anything, my catching him makes him more determined. He's going between super depressed and the manic giddy thing when texting (that's how I can tell literally within 15 minutes of him contacting someone). Sometimes he wants to stop, but sometimes he doesn't again. We had a week without this part, it was so much easier to deal with the rest of the symptoms. The 'relapse' or whatever you want to call it is much harder for me for some reason, even though I knew it was very much a possibility. He has a real psychologist appointment tomorrow, which obviously won't solve everything but hope it will start to right the ship; he doesn't want me to come, but I've already called ahead and gave my spiel. Have continued to talk with Stephen Ministry and pastor. School with kids has slowed, I've told them we are focusing on home ec and just cleaning the house when they are here. It's been the crunch time for the end-of-year performances, etc., so we haven't been in the house as much anyway. Have spoken with 2 oldest about mental illness and their dad. 8yo seemed to get it, 6yo asked if I had ever seen a real velociraptor. lol lol, I hope the next update has better news; if things stay much as they are, I probably won't update past a "no change" post. Thanks for sticking with me. 30 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Hugs and more hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneStepAtATime Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: So sorry. Still keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 (edited) We are so very with you. It's a strange techy world where that's true, but it is true. We live in your pocket, and yet we are real! Reach out any time. Edited May 10, 2017 by bolt. 14 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LMD Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 you are wonderful moonhawk, you're doing a great job. Lol @ your 6 year old! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 :grouphug: Praying for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scholastica Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Continuing to pray for all of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Hugs and more hugs. Ditto. I am sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 More (hugs) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Sending hugs and prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 Thank you for the update -- I'm sorry things aren't going well. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corraleno Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cintinative Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 Praying for you and for the appointment tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bzymom Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 I am sorry :grouphug: :grouphug: . Please take care of yourself and your little ones. Would he consider living with his parents while seeking help? Removing yourself from the every day (every hour, every 4 minutes) ups and downs is important. He may not love it, they may not love it, but until he has meaningful medical intervention, all you can do is protect yourself and your kids and stay out of the way of the train. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink and Green Mom Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 Many, many hugs to you and your children. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnnE-girl Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 Continuing to pray for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
idnib Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasider Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 So sorry, moonhawk. You must be exhausted. My prayers are with you and your children. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 ((((((Hugs))))))) Bless your sweet heart! I am sorry things are escalating again. Continuing to pray for you and your family! Praying for strength in the midst and for the help your dh needs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
displace Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 Hugs and prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 ((((((Hug & Prayers)))))) Continuing to lift you and your family up in prayer! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne in CA Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I'm sorry how all this is playing out. I'm still praying for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 What a roller coaster this has been for you and your children. Please get some IRL support. Nobody should carry this alone. I hope the psych appointment brought some clarity for him, something, anything. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mominco Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I hope the appointment went well and the psych prescribed some meds for him. :grouphug: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica_in_Switzerland Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 Have spoken with 2 oldest about mental illness and their dad. 8yo seemed to get it, 6yo asked if I had ever seen a real velociraptor. lol You know in movies, at the most tense moments, they always write in a bit of "comic relief". It sounds like your 6yo is a natural-born script writer. :-) My thoughts and prayers are with you. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I will pray. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ksr5377 Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I wanted to let you know you and your family have been on my mind and in my prayers these past few weeks and will continue to be in the future. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 Hugs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 You are in my thoughts and prayers this evening! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasider Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 Thinking of you tonight, moonhawk, may the Lord bring peace to your rolling seas. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonhawk Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 (edited) Small progress, not really. eta: taking out my problem and advice request. I keep reading it over and I got my answer. sorry for confusing anyone ! Edited May 13, 2017 by Moonhawk 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 Moonhawk, many hugs from me. Prayers for peace, courage, strength, grace, and rest. Keep talking here, letting it out. The hive wants to support you. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matrips Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 We're still praying for the both of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted May 14, 2017 Share Posted May 14, 2017 ((((((Hugs Moonhawk)))))) Praying you have the strength and the wisdom you need in the midst of this very challenging time! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted May 14, 2017 Share Posted May 14, 2017 Hugs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted May 14, 2017 Share Posted May 14, 2017 Hey, just a reminder that Mr. Halmark had no idea that this would be your life today. Don't let the sentimental claptrap about mothers' day get you down. You are taking care of life, marriage and parenting "like a boss" -- and you don't need anybody to spoil you or give you one random perfect day to prove it. 20 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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