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bolt.

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bolt. last won the day on July 7 2013

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About bolt.

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  1. I also suggest that you develop a phrase that you can (honestly) say about your views on the situation that would be as inoffensive as possible. (Because she may ask for you to confirm that you believe her in black-and-white terms before she decides what to do.) I know that you just actually don't believe her. It's hard for that not to sound harsh. Maybe something like, "I don't know what happened (that day). I find this whole thing so confusing." -- so you sound open, unsure (nothing's certain, after all) and warm. Think of it as technically being honest while letting her feel more supported than she is. It's like a press conference. (I know you think you know for sure. Can you just find that tiny sliver of hypothetical theoretical doubt -- that nobody could really know the whole truth, because omniscience is impossible for humans -- and leverage that to sound (in your tone) more unsure than you really are?)
  2. Since you can't contact her except through amazon, I suggest you reach out to her that way. Send *her* a small trinket with a gift message like, "Hey, I know we aren't okay, but I saw your address on amazon and wanted to let you know I'm thinking about you. I was also hoping it might be okay for me to use amazon to send a small gift to each of the kids on their birthdays this year? If that's not a good idea, just let me know. I want to respect your wishes. Love, MedicMom."
  3. I have also made "double sweet" simple syrup by adding liquid stevia into simple syrup.
  4. I've transitioned to mostly stevia. I found that I couldn't really "switch" to stevia, but what I could do is use a small amount of sugar in combination with stevia. I currently use about 10 percent of the normal amount of sugar to sweeten anything. This creates that ephemeral impression of sugar (whatever it is!) and I can calculate how much stevia I want to use to make up the rest of the sweetness. At first, I could really tell if the stevia was providing more than 50% of the sweetness, so I created "double sweet sugar" by mixing cane sugar and stevia powder and putting it in my sugar bowl for hot drinks. Eventually, I tilted the proportions so far that I stopped bothering making custom blends and switched to liquid stevia. I can use stevia straight in my drinks, but I sometimes look for a pinch of sugar anyhow.
  5. Is "Boots" a place that sells personal care products?
  6. In college, the expressions "C's get degrees" really addresses this issue. Would be "good enough" to simply scrape a pass in these courses and still obtain enough credits to graduate? Because, honestly, he could probably turn in half of his assignments, each of them half done, and still come out with a pair of C-minuses in these classes that will allow him to call himself a graduate. GIving a few assignments a half-effort for a couple of months is not a "major change". It's taking a deep breath and dedicating maybe 10 evenings towards knocking off the minimum requirements, and it will save him from being registered in summer school. Together the kid and his parents should be able to pull that off.
  7. So, I'm traveling to UK and other parts of Europe, and I have serious skin allergies. Normally I would take my known-safe shampoo and other body products with me, but we are trying to go carry-on-only, which means there is a limit on liquids. I'm hoping someone with feet on the ground in the UK could maybe... (a) tell me if my usual brands are probably available for purchase in London, (b) or, let me know the names of the types of stores that sell such things so I can look for myself when I get there, but at least I'm looking somewhere promising, (c) or, make suggestions for hopefully-safe replacement products that are available locally. My known-safe products are... Aveeno body wash: with "Fragrance-Free" on the label Dove "Derma Care" "For Dry Scalp and Itch Relief" shampoo and conditioner Neutrogena "Dry Touch" or "Ultra Sheer" sunscreen "for the face" For other product suggestions, usually, if something is labeled with both "hypoallergenic" and "fragrance-free" it can work for me -- but it can be hit-and-miss. I'd feel less nervous if I knew I wouldn't be experimenting. Thanks, I know that's a bit of a chore. I'd consider it a big favour.
  8. It sounds like you need an accountant to compare scenarios for you... darn.
  9. It'll be the lead. 250lbs of lead, in the spire. "...the wood and lead spire was built during a restoration in the mid-19th century...." I wonder if the lead is airborne and making the smoke particularly toxic?
  10. Apparently some few of the meaningful pieces had been removed temporarily during the refurbishing that was happening. Therefore, anything that was off site for that reason will have survived... I wonder which ones.
  11. I was going to see it, in Paris, in just 3 weeks. I’m so sad!
  12. I’ve lived with unrelated young adults (rent free, no contributions expected) multiple times for periods greater than a year. In all that time, it never occurred to me to consider a curfew or the idea that communication about arrival time was ‘courteous’. It’s not really a ‘courtesy’ that unrelated house-sharing people adopt — even if one is a homeowner and the other is a non-launched uncontributor, The reason I didn’t need or want these things is because — as a non parent — I was very much less invested in whether or not my young friends were ‘safe’ or whether they were making good life choices. I cared, generally, and hoped for good things for them: but on a friendly level, not a parenty level. I think you need to acknowledge a difference between the things you want for ‘sensible house sharing’ reasons, and the things you want for parenty reasons. You can still want both things... but it would be good to know the diffference.
  13. It happened to me once. Just a super weird cycle, nothing was going on. (Could have been stress.)
  14. I’m not sure why you were apologetic, unless it was just to be extra tactful? Its the plain truth that enough chores exist that some of them need to be done after supper. It’s weird that you not only do them all yourself (when both of you are available and cabable) but also apologize for doing it. Its more logical to say, “Since there are chores to be done, we can’t watch tv right now. Would you rather do x or y tonight?” Try really hard to believe, “It’s not my work, it’s just work. Whoever is nearby should be pitching in.” — the more you believe it, the more you will be able to communicate it. It’s not your fault that you both work all day in separate places, and yet work remains in the evening when you are both in the same place. It just needs to get done.
  15. It sounds like you are doing a great job of that tactful approach. You’re nailing both clarity and kindness.
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