Undergarments as gifts...do you like this sort of thing?

[SparklyUnicorn]

I have been seeing these commercials for services that sell undergarment sets (bra/underwear) and it claims that the female in your life will "love it"....they "promise".  This is a gift that is absolutely unappealing to me.  Now I know, different strokes for different folks, but I have zero desire to receive this as a gift and can't think of any time in my life when I would have wanted such a gift.  So am I weird?  Is this really something that women in general want as a gift and are thrilled by?

 

 

[chocolatechip]

I agree with you. I have never once desired undergarments for a gift! I want to pick what I want!!

[SparklyUnicorn]

Although, to add to the above, I've always liked the idea of a pajama gram or whatever it's called, where they send you snuggly pjs. I can definitely get behind cuddly pajamas!

 

Yes, PJs I'd go for.  That's one thing I'm always too cheap to buy so it's a good gift. 

[Rachel]

Um no. Pjs or a nightgown from my husband would be ok.

[Guest]

Pj s maybe. Undies nope.

 

This was a very hard email to type because every time I wrote p and then j it came up Patty Joanna. Haha

[OneStepAtATime]

PJs or a nightgown, you bet.  Undies?  Heck no.  Especially a bra 'cause there is no way in he** they would get the size right.  I want to pick out my own undies.  

 

 

[Tap]

I had a friend who loved it when her hubby bought her lingerie.  I know it is a trend with older teens/college students to buy each other intimates, so maybe it is becoming more common. 

[happi duck]

Nope. Never. Ever.

 

When I married my sister's knew better than to have any sort of bachelorette type thing. They did feel the need though to give me two fancy nightgowns after the wedding rehearsal. I never ever wore them.

[regentrude]

No way.

[rebcoola]

Nope

[MercyA]

They did feel the need though to give me two fancy nightgowns after the wedding rehearsal. I never ever wore them.

 

Most of that stuff is just too darn cold to wear to bed. Brrrr.

Edited January 29, 2017 by MercyA

[happypamama]

I'd rather pick out my own undies.  Now, if DH wanted to pick out something that he'd like to see me wear, that would be okay, but not if it were my gift.  And MIL buys me comfy pjs fairly regularly for Christmas, which I very much appreciate because she buys nicer ones than I'd buy for myself, and I don't mind that at all.  But nobody else needs to pick out undergarments for me.

Edited January 29, 2017 by happypamama

[foxbridgeacademy]

No thank you.  I was married before and was given that kind of stuff for presents, I remember thinking "this is more for you then me".  

 

DH would never think to give me something like that for a present. A robe/pjs yes but even then he knows I'd rather have art supplies or a new kitchen gadget (or even better is when he builds me something!). 

[SparklyUnicorn]

I'd rather pick out my own undies.  Now, if DH wanted to pick out something that he'd like to see me wear, that would be okay, but not if it were my gift.  And MIL buys me comfy pjs fairly regularly for Christmas, which I very much appreciate because she buys nicer ones than I'd buy for myself, and I don't mind that at all.  But nobody else needs to pick out undergarments for me.

 

Well yeah that would be HIS gift maybe.

[laundrycrisis]

No !!!!!

[Guest]

I don't even understand buying a bra on-line rather than in person. Maybe I'm very picky. Don't they have one that is a subscription service, where they keep sending you sets of bras and panties? I find that baffling.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I don't even understand buying a bra on-line rather than in person. Maybe I'm very picky. Don't they have one that is a subscription service, where they keep sending you sets of bras and panties? I find that baffling.

 

I find it baffling too.

 

I think these companies were invented by men or something.  Seriously...

 

I mean if you get a t-shirt that doesn't fit perfectly...whatever.  But who wants a dang bra/underwear set that doesn't fit right or is completely not practical (unless that was what you were going for)?

[marbel]

I'll join the "no way" chorus.  I wear a size that is readily available in any store, but the style makes a huge difference in the fit.   There is just no way, other than dumb luck, that someone could pick something out for me and have it work.   

 

And, I don't know, but I don't find underwear gift-worthy even if it's nicer stuff than I would buy.  Everyone pretty much needs underwear in some form.  It's a utility item.  (Yeah, I know, it can also be pretty and s*xy.)   I don't give my husband or kids underwear as gifts.

 

 

[TravelingChris]

Well, one of the online services offers a different way to size up bras and they send you lots of measuring items so that you get the right fit.  Except it didn't work for me but I think I did order one for one of my dd's who at the time was having a hard time finding a bra.  

 

I don't want bras or underwear for presents since those are opened up in front of family members I don't want to be opening up underwear.  I think I might have gotten some really nice silk long underwear for a present (or maybe it was just ordered for me anyway not as a present) but I consider long underwear to be much closer to pjs or nightgowns.  I do like getting pjs or nightgowns.

 

My other daughter does get underwear from her husband and she likes that.  I think it is mostly that she wants more expensive items and would prefer to have him spend the money on practical items (the underwear is a regular type of underwear, just more expensive than a bargain brand) than on even more jewelry.  Her husband tends to buy jewelry that is very similar to ones he already bought and I know her jewelry style is more like mine than what he keeps buying her.

[fairfarmhand]

No

 

 

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[kiana]

I don't even understand buying a bra on-line rather than in person. Maybe I'm very picky. Don't they have one that is a subscription service, where they keep sending you sets of bras and panties? I find that baffling.

 

I have a terrible time finding anything that's actually supportive in my size when shopping in person. I shop online at places that have free returns if it doesn't fit. 

[hjffkj]

I wouldn't mind if dh bought me a matching bra and underwear set but when he buys me gifts he buys me many so it wouldn't be the only thing.y favorite nursing bras cost $80 and I wish they were the only bras I owned. I can't justify spending that much so I'm not only wearing those. If he surprised me with a new nursing bra I'd be delighted.

 

But in reality I'm more likely to buy new lingerie for myself as one of dh's gifts. I've done it multiple times.

Edited January 29, 2017 by hjffkj

[RoughCollie]

No. Absolutely not. Although I suppose it would tell me a lot about the giver. Granny pants, they think I'm old. Thong, they think I'm ultra hip. With bra, they think I am floppy. Without it, I still look young and firm. Lingerie, they think I look sexy. Pajamas, they think my primary concerns are warmth and being comfortable. Too large, they think I'm fat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Seasider]

A gift? But for who, really?

 

I think a gift of lingerie comes with a lot of expectations and not what I personally think of as a gift that conveys honor and respect. As a honeymooner, maybe that was okay. But now as a life partner of many years and shepherding mother of all his children? I would be gravely disappointed to receive racy lingerie as a gift from my husband.

 

Underwear from anyone else but my husband, that's just icky.

 

Relationships are complicated. People will feel differently about this. But personally, no.

[Raifta]

Having never owned a 'set' of underwear and having no desire to do so, I would absolutely not want to get this as a gift. 

 

I like boring underwear and one specific type of bra that has been discontinued.  Actually if someone wanted to search for that particular bra and buy me some from wherever it might still be sold, I would love to get that.  But I'm pretty sure that it's not being sold by the companies the OP is discussing.

[Lizzie in Ma]

Umm, no.  Not now, not ever.

[gardenmom5]

no.  the only person I would be comfortable giving that as a gift as dh - and that is so NOT his 'thing'.

 

several people gave 2dd s3xy underwear/lingerie as a shower gift.  she turned beet red when she opened them - and it only made things worse when sil grabbed it and put it on full display for all to see.

[mellifera33]

My mom (!) gave me a sexy lingerie set at my bridal shower. I was so embarrassed opening it in front of all of my elderly relatives. Then all the elderly relatives teased me about my red face, saying, "Oh, it's not even that revealing!" Yes, at 25 I was a bigger fuddy-duddy than my 70-80 y/o relatives.  :laugh:

[slackermom]

The first Christmas after I got married, MIL got matching silky panty&shawl sets for me and her other DIL. Major cringe moment when we opened them.

 

No thanks. To any more underwear. Ever.

[Greta]

No.  Not because I do not appreciate good lingerie.  In fact, I adore nice lingerie.  But what's "nice" is entirely subjective, and I wouldn't really want anyone else picking it out for me.  Not to mention the issue of fit.  

[Crimson Wife]

 

I think a gift of lingerie comes with a lot of expectations and not what I personally think of as a gift that conveys honor and respect. As a honeymooner, maybe that was okay. But now as a life partner of many years and shepherding mother of all his children? I would be gravely disappointed to receive racy lingerie as a gift from my husband.

 

Really? You think lingerie from your husband is disrespectful? I would personally take it as a compliment, that he still finds me attractive after all these years together (we've been married 18 and together for 21).

 

[happypamama]

The first Christmas after I got married, MIL got matching silky panty&shawl sets for me and her other DIL. Major cringe moment when we opened them.

 

No thanks. To any more underwear. Ever.

Note to self (who will likely have a lot of DILs someday): don't do this. Haha.

 

Otoh, MIL got me a nursing bra the Christmas I was pregnant with her first grandchild. She did warn me that I might not want to open it in front of everyone. In her case, it was her way of being supportive of breastfeeding because those things are expensive. Knowing her and thus knowing her intent, I didn't think it was icky at all but sweet. Lingerie, otoh? No. That's weird, although I suppose I'd be glad she likes me enough to be supportive of me sleeping with her son.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Really? You think lingerie from your husband is disrespectful? I would personally take it as a compliment, that he still finds me attractive after all these years together (we've been married 18 and together for 21).

 

 

The way I took what she said is it's not her thing and if her husband paid attention ever he wouldn't buy a gift she wouldn't appreciate/want.  Who wants to feel pressured to have sex as a gift to them?  I don't.  That's a gift for him.  Maybe he can buy it for himself on his birthday.  It's not a gift for me. 

 

That's my take anyway and I feel similarly. 

[Crimson Wife]

I guess I'm the odd one out, because I love it when DH gives me lingerie. These days it's typically a gift card as he doesn't have a lot of free time to shop.

 

One of the sweetest gifts he gave me was a sexy nightgown during my third pregnancy when I was feeling as huge as a cow. I was self-conscious during TeA and wanted to have the lights off. DH went out and got me the lingerie to cheer me up and show that he still found me attractive, bump and all. :001_tt1:

[Crimson Wife]

The way I took what she said is it's not her thing and if her husband paid attention ever he wouldn't buy a gift she wouldn't appreciate/want.  Who wants to feel pressured to have sex as a gift to them?  I don't.  That's a gift for him.  Maybe he can buy it for himself on his birthday.  It's not a gift for me. 

 

That's my take anyway and I feel similarly. 

 

I guess it would depend on the relationship. Enjoying a good cup of TeA is a gift to both spouses in my book. ;)

[sheryl]

I would not like it!  Now, if my dh bought me a pretty undergarment then fine.  But, I certainly wouldn't accept/wear such a gift given to me by my sister, brother, etc.

 

On that note, when dd was around 12 (she's turning 18 in a few months) my brother and his wife sent dd a cheap bracelet which ended up breaking and a flimsy sports bra (she's endowed) for Christmas one year.

 

I didn't let her keep/wear the bra b/c that's TOOOOOOOOOO weird for me so I pitched it! :thumbup:

[SparklyUnicorn]

I guess it would depend on the relationship. Enjoying a good cup of TeA is a gift to both spouses in my book. ;)

 

I don't know if it would depend on the relationship.  I think it depends on my mood.  If I'm not in the mood, back off.  Buying me underwear will not put me in the mood.  LOL

 

But that circles back to my point about a spouse knowing you or not.  I know it was just a dumb commercial, but the message was of course women love this stuff.  Not all women love this stuff. 

[TranquilMind]

I have been seeing these commercials for services that sell undergarment sets (bra/underwear) and it claims that the female in your life will "love it"....they "promise".  This is a gift that is absolutely unappealing to me.  Now I know, different strokes for different folks, but I have zero desire to receive this as a gift and can't think of any time in my life when I would have wanted such a gift.  So am I weird?  Is this really something that women in general want as a gift and are thrilled by?

 

Ew.  No.  I buy my own underwear, thanks.  I've seen those too on TV.  They are ridiculously overpriced. 

 

[LucyStoner]

My husband can buy me underwear. And that's only because he sees my underwear often enough that he knows what I like to wear. That said, he doesn't buy me underwear especially often.

 

That's it. Just him.

 

If anyone else bought me underwear I would me flabbergasted. Nor would I ever buy underwear as a gift for someone else. I buy it for my kids but I am not someone who calls that "a gift".

[Greta]

I guess I'm the odd one out, because I love it when DH gives me lingerie. These days it's typically a gift card as he doesn't have a lot of free time to shop.

 

One of the sweetest gifts he gave me was a sexy nightgown during my third pregnancy when I was feeling as huge as a cow. I was self-conscious during TeA and wanted to have the lights off. DH went out and got me the lingerie to cheer me up and show that he still found me attractive, bump and all. :001_tt1:

 

 

What a sweet hubby you have there!  I think I would also like it if my dh bought me a sexy nightgown or something like that -- something purely for fun, because I do prefer to choose the everyday stuff myself.  He just doesn't do that sort of thing, and I'm not sure why.  He does make me feel attractive and desirable!  He's just never done it with lingerie.   :001_smile:

[Katy]

If I had tiny boobs and it was easy to buy a bra off the rack, I'd probably love it.

[theelfqueen]

Probably over sharing but I had a splendies subscription for a while and it was fun... I picked it for myself I made the call on size and I enjoyed it for a while... and my teenager stopped trying to open my packages lol

 

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[Greta]

If I had tiny boobs and it was easy to buy a bra off the rack, I'd probably love it.

 

 

Oh, let me assure you, having tiny boobs does NOT make it easy to buy a bra off the rack!  :lol:

[Seasider]

Really? You think lingerie from your husband is disrespectful? I would personally take it as a compliment, that he still finds me attractive after all these years together (we've been married 18 and together for 21).

 

Um, yes, I said what I meant. And I added that I understood opinions would vary. If my dh wants to pay me a compliment, he knows and respects the fact that gifts of lacy underwear isn't the way to do it. A lively discussion of a book or film over a nice dinner and glass of wine is a much bigger turn on for me. There are many other ways for him to convey that he still finds me attractive.

[Seasider]

I guess it would depend on the relationship. Enjoying a good cup of TeA is a gift to both spouses in my book. ;)

Truly, sparkly hit the nail on the head. Many thoughts come to mind as I've attempted to reply to your comment here, but suffice it to say our marital relationship is just fine, thank you very much.

[SparklyUnicorn]

The way to my heart is doing dishes.  Really...

 

LMAO

 

Don't buy me stupid underwear. 

[Spryte]

I'm out of likes here, but I'm with the few who say that I would have no problem with DH buying me lingerie, in fact I'd think it's pretty cool that we've been married 18 years, together for more than 30, and he still thinks of me that way. That would make me happy. He'd have zero delusions that it's a "gift" for me, it'd more of a "hey, this looks like fun for both of us" thing and if I nix it - no stress. So, no, he wouldn't give it as an occasion gift, more like an extra surprise. And he knows I like it. If I didn't - he'd respect that. All that said, any lingerie purchased in this house is usually by the person planning to wear it, as a surprise for the other party.

 

Now everyday undies and bras - those are all mine. Well, DH could buy undies because he knows what I like, but it would be like, hey I picked these up for you, not as a gift. He'd never in a thousand years call that a gift. And bras - nope. Gotta try those on.

 

And undies and bras from anyone else? Ick!

[KungFuPanda]

I wouldn't mind from DH. I'm not hard to fit, but if they're not absolutely comfortable they'd just be what I call "stunt panties." You switch into them for the exciting stuff but you don't walk around in them all day. I don't really 'need' support so it's not hard to find a bra that fits, but if it has a wire I might not choose it too often.

[Spryte]

I wouldn't mind from DH. I'm not hard to fit, but if they're not absolutely comfortable they'd just be what I call "stunt panties." You switch into them for the exciting stuff but you don't walk around in them all day. I don't really 'need' support so it's not hard to find a bra that fits, but if it has a wire I might not choose it too often.

 

Stunt panties.  

 

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:

[dirty ethel rackham]

I wouldn't mind from DH. I'm not hard to fit, but if they're not absolutely comfortable they'd just be what I call "stunt panties." You switch into them for the exciting stuff but you don't walk around in them all day. I don't really 'need' support so it's not hard to find a bra that fits, but if it has a wire I might not choose it too often.

Stunt panties.  You win the interwebs today!  :lol: :lol:

 

Back to the original question ... dh and I have this running joke of buying each other underwear and socks for birthdays/Christmas.  I got him his regular underwear for our first Christmas (he's picky about the brand/style - a quality/fit thing.)  I joked that it was my duty as a wife.  I of course, got him other stuff as well.  Hubby soon figured out that, after our first kid was born, the undies for me thing wasn't going to work because fit/style/comfort was a difficult puzzle to solve with my new shape.  So he gets me socks (I love good quality socks) and pajamas instead.  From anyone else ... no way. 

 

ETA: I still get him underwear because his favorite brand only goes on sale once or twice a year so I stock up.  I have a stash awaiting his birthday next month. 

Edited January 30, 2017 by dirty ethel rackham