Things I am NOT doing this year

[Moxie]

I am not sending Christmas cards. Want to see my kids? Find me on FB! I'm done spending time and money on things people will throw away.

 

I'm not doing homemade gifts. I don't have time and most people would rather have a $10 Panera card anyway.

 

I'm not giving as many gifts. I'll still do end of the school year gifts but I'm not getting a Christmas gift for all the teachers, coaches, etc. that my 5 kids have.

 

All those little touches my kids never notice? Nope, done. One year the kids each got special wrapping paper. Not one of them noticed and it was a pain in the behind for me. No themes, no stressing about things matching. Done.

 

I'm done spending 6 weeks or more of my life trying to make this one day perfect. A week after it happens, I'm the only one that remembers.

 

Feel free to add yours.

[mommyoffive]

Love it!!

 

I am right there with you. 

 

No cards

 

No homemade gifts

 

No gifts to anyone but the kids.  And I have gone into giving them experiences more than physical gifts.  Trips.  Memberships.  Classes. 

 

I am this close to going to a hotel this year.  I always said I wouldn't.  But someone else doing the cooking, decorating, planning, cleaning.  Sounds like a dream to me.

[bethben]

I'm only sending Christmas cards to my family.  I am buying teacher Christmas gift cards, but I only have one child in school and it's his last  year (special ed).  Christmas cards stress my husband out each year because he wants to "do it himself" for people he knows and doesn't have the time.

[Julie Smith]

Well I'm the opposite. 

 

This is the first Christmas we aren't going to my parents. I have also found my kids ask for so little that we rarely get them much of anything. My parents and their aunts and uncles usually cover everything. 

 

So this year I will be doing some decorating.

 

I will be buying my kids Christmas presents. (Eldest and Dh really want Dance pads for PC, but that is impossible to get where I live. Since we have bad experiences with them in the past I want to buy from a physical store where we can return them to if they don't work)

 

I will have to think about food, of some kind for the holidays.

 

I will think about stocking stuffers, and all that sort of stuff. 

 

 

The one think I'm not doing is making a family edition of a board game. In the past I would take a popular board game and remake it featuring our extended family in some way, then give the game to various members of extended family. (ie. Love letter, One Night Werewolf... )

 

[Penguin]

I am also dropping the little touches that do not get noticed. Especially agonizing over stocking stuffers. Nope.

 

I dropped Christmas cards when we moved overseas, and now that we are back I see no need to start up again. I like sending snail mail during the year but cannot get behind Christmas cards any longer.

[snowbeltmom]

I simplified years ago when my kids were small.

 

1. Stopped sending out Christmas cards

 

2. Did 99.9% of shopping online

 

3. Not cooking Christmas dinner - We order in Chinese, which my kids would much rather have than my cooking any day of the year!

 

 

[BarbecueMom]

I'm not doing Christmas cards (haven't in several years). What's new is that I stopped doing Facebook this year as well, and DH never has used it. No one has seemed to notice.

 

I'm also not buying in-law family gifts. I passed that task to DH. We might end up stopping at Walgreens on Christmas for gift cards as we head out there, but I am not putting it on my plate this year.

[teachermom2834]

The new thing I am not doing this year involves shopping for my three teen boys. In the past I would take requests but also try to surprise them and find other things they would like that they didn't ask for. Not this year. I told them I wanted very specific lists and if they want something they better ask for it.

 

They hesitate to ask for anything but I do not want to spend time, energy, and money on gifts that may or may not be useful to them or suit their tastes. Once I got lists from them it got my shopping done for them in about 30 minutes online🙂

[displace]

We haven't done cards for a while. I feel pretty guilty but it is a big time saver.

 

I buy gift cards for most everyone. I am getting a few more physical gifts this year for relatives because I feel I have the time. Otherwise they usually get gift cards too.

[Spryte]

No Christmas cards.

 

No over-booking our family - we are NOT spending Xmas Eve and Xmas Day in the car driving 2 hours each way to see various relatives.  

 

Minimal homemade gifts - last year's painstakingly planned and crafted gifts (that were expensive, to boot!) were not appreciated.  At all.  So I'm done.  For a few special people, who have requested it, we are making kahlua again, and some salt scrub, but no one else.  

 

Not going overboard on holiday baking.  I've been losing weight, I don't want to sabotage it, and I don't want the hassle.  We'll make cookies one day only, and live with that.  

 

I love stockings, so can't give that up.  :)  We'll keep the beloved traditions (we do the golden ticket under the pillow, and then do this whole polar express thing to go look at lights with the kids in pjs.  They were just wondering what night they'd find their golden tickets and get to stay up late - so it looks like that one's a keeper!).

[trulycrabby]

No Elf on the Shelf. He kept eating the cupcakes and guzzling the kombucha.

 

This is also our first Christmas without Legos or Nerf in about fifteen years. :(

[kewb]

I haven't done holiday cards in years.  We have mostly dropped off everyone's card list or they stopped sending too.  We still get a few.  

 

I bake a special treat for my teens.  Everyone else gets a gift card or cash.  A few years ago money was tighter then usual so I gave all the teens in the family a giant mug from the dollar store, a packet of hot cocoa mix, and homemade fudge.  The younger teens loved it. The older teens put on their game face.   They wanted cash.

 

 

[Dmmetler]

This year DD is buying gifts instead of making them. Which means that, yes, I'm really buying them, since we agreed to temporarily double her earned money for October and November so she could buy gifts-but it definitely reduces my stress. And, honestly, since I was the one buying ingredients and supplies, I'm not sure it really costs any more.

 

 

 

 

[happypamama]

I'm not making a fancy Christmas dinner. I haven't in years. We like having the big traditional meal for Thanksgiving, but for Christmas, the children would rather have an informal meal that they can eat when they're hungry or grab while playing. So I tend to make a big pot of chili, and we will have tortilla chips, cheeses, and other snacky sort of stuff. We might get out of our pajamas, and we might not. We won't have family here for Christmas, just the 7.5 of us.

 

I am thinking about making Quiver's cinnamon rolls. My people liked the sound of that.

 

ETA: And cookies. We have a list of about seven types of cookies that the children consider to be essential. And everyone likes having cookies for Christmas.

Edited December 6, 2016 by happypamama

[barnwife]

Well, my due date is about 3 weeks away. So, I am doing more or less nothing that isn't already done. 

No Christmas cards. (My mom is horrified.)
No presents for anyone but our kids. (Again, my family is horrified. Although, to be fair, our oldest said "we should get Grandpa this (a treat he likes)" when we were at the store. So, since it's shelf stable, I bought it. But I am not thinking about anybody else.)
No fancy Christmas Eve or Christmas day meals.
Not making a million cookies. (Normally I make 6 or more kinds, dozens each. We've done 3 kinds, maybe 2 dozen each. And I think I am baked out.)

I feel like the Grinch. But this year, Christmas-wise is so much less stressful, that I think I may keep the above going in future years.

[Tess in the Burbs]

I decided to stop sending the in-laws gifts they don't like.  I'm tired of swapping gift cards.  I sent them a live wreath for their front door(including hanger).  The grandma loves it.  No word from MIL/FIL.  I know it's beautiful, and they can enjoy or give away to someone else, I don't care.  I sent a thoughtful item.  Done.  

 

And I'm pretty much deciding to send Christmas cards in the future only to those not on FB...  I think I got 5 cards last year.  I did send some this year. I found 3 boxes in the decorations, so I have enough for those non FB people for years to come...they won't notice it's the same card since they throw them away!  HAHAHA

 

 

[emzhengjiu]

We ordered Chinese food last year for Christmas; it was wonderful!  I'm thinking of a roast in the crock pot this year.  Easy!

 

I don't do Christmas cards but my older teen does.  She enjoys sending and receiving them, but they stress me!

 

My daughters select exactly what they want as gifts and usually order them online.  I pay for them.

 

If I'm working close to Christmas day, the girls wrap their own presents.  That's awful, isn't it?

 

My girls, also, put up our Christmas tree each year.  We only put on lights.  We stopped decorating the tree with ornaments a few years ago because of long it took and because the ornaments became cat toys very quickly.

 

I love Christmas and want to enjoy the loveliness of the season, not be stressed by the unimportant!

[LJPPKGFGSC]

 

 

The one think I'm not doing is making a family edition of a board game. In the past I would take a popular board game and remake it featuring our extended family in some way, then give the game to various members of extended family. (ie. Love letter, One Night Werewolf... )

 

This sounds fun! Can you explain a little better how you accomplish this?  Thanks in advance.

[Critterfixer]

No Christmas tree this year. 

[Ali in OR]

I actually like doing the Christmas cards, and that's one thing that won't get dropped. We do a photo card and a newsletter that's a bit humorous and captures our life for the past year. The photo and letter go in our Christmas scrapbook and we all love to read the 25 years we now have. It's family history. And I get lots of positive feedback that I think it brightens others' lives too.

 

But dropping homemade gifts. Dropping the idea that Christmas cookie gifts (mostly to the aides in disabled dd's class) need to all be the same flavor. Dropping math next week so I have more time for the Christmas stuff that I actually like but don't have enough time for.

[regentrude]

Reading through the thread, I am beginning to understand why I no longer receive cards. It's a bit sad to be on the receiving end of other people's simplifications, sigh.

Do those of you who cut out cards also not enjoy receiving them? Am I kidding myself when I think that me writing letters brings joy to the recipients? 

Edited December 6, 2016 by regentrude

[Critterfixer]

I haven't sent Christmas cards in a while unless I'm sending a gift with them. But no, I don't particularly enjoy getting Christmas cards. I used to write quite a few letters, but I haven't written letters in years now. So few of my friends ever wrote back. So I just stopped. 

 

 

Do those of you who cut out cards also not enjoy receiving them? Am I kidding myself when I think that me writing letters brings joy to the recipients? 

 

 

[gingersmom]

I'm buying gift bags at dollar store, no wrapping paper.

 

I hate wrapping gifts plus I'm awful at it.

[Critterfixer]

Not having a tree this year is a family decision. We all elected to forgo the tree in favor of treating our wildlife to some special birdseed treats. And we have a young cat who would spend most of her time trying to perch in the tree. :glare:

[Reefgazer]

I refuse to buy gift cards anymore.  If I can't find a gift that is special for the people on my list, I'll give cash in a card so that they can use it in any store, I have it handy, and it never expires.

[HS Mom in NC]

You go, girl!  That's fantastic! 
 
I'm not buying for anyone other than my dad, my spouse, my kids and their SOs. Everyone but my dad has an online wish list and will give me a list of treats they'd like for stocking stuffers. No more gifts for the children of my 4 siblings and my husband's sister. We've cut down from 20 to 8. Instead I'm bringing a big box of fireworks for the kids to share and enjoy.

I am cooking a meal for Christmas Eve lunch but I didn't host my usual Thanksgiving this year for my 20-30 relatives and friends and I don't mind cooking.

[Guest]

Reading through the thread, I am beginning to understand why I no longer receive cards. It's a bit sad to be on the receiving end of other people's simplifications, sigh.

Do those of you who cut out cards also not enjoy receiving them? Am I kidding myself when I think that me writing letters brings joy to the recipients?

I receive no letters, only photo cards. I used to tape the up but now I just pitch them as soon as I open them.

[Valley Girl]

I'm not baking cookies. I enjoy baking generally. I have good memories of baking Christmas cookies. But it's been a rough few months and I'm feeling pretty unappreciated due to general attitudes and lack of cooperation, so I decided that this is one area in which Mom doesn't have to put herself out for everyone.  I sort of feel bad about it. But not bad enough to do it.

[HS Mom in NC]

Reading through the thread, I am beginning to understand why I no longer receive cards. It's a bit sad to be on the receiving end of other people's simplifications, sigh.

Do those of you who cut out cards also not enjoy receiving them? Am I kidding myself when I think that me writing letters brings joy to the recipients? 

 

Yes, I do enjoy reading letters in Christmas cards, however, it was extremely rare that the people who have ever sent me Christmas cards wrote a letter in them.  Usually it's a Merry Christmas and some signatures. Two aunts usually wrote a few short paragraphs but one no longer does and the other doesn't send cards anymore. I'm FB friends with my cousins so I don't need the annual update from their mothers about what's going on with them which is mostly what they wrote on the Christmas cards.

 

I only get a few Christmas cards from people these days.  I get them from organizations and businesses like the dentist and our adoption agency.

[SamanthaCarter]

I've never managed to get my act together well enough to really have stuff to cut! LOL!

 

I don't do Christmas cards, I don't buy multiple gifts for the kids, I just put standard stuff in the stockings: candy, boxed cookies and pop tarts, oranges, dollar store trinkets. I don't often do outside decorations, it's usually a Christmas tree, mantle and front door wreath. We're pretty lame, and I'm still overwhelmed! (I suppose I did a little more before kiddos.)

[regentrude]

I receive no letters, only photo cards. I used to tape the up but now I just pitch them as soon as I open them.

 

I would love to receive photos from my friends whom I see only once a year, sometimes only every few years. And I thought they might like that too... apparently not?

[SparklyUnicorn]

Nobody in my family does letters.  They just sign the card.  My husband's family, they generally do write something (it's all in German though). 

 

I do like getting cards I guess because it feels like someone thought of me.  That said, I haven't really done cards in some time.  I guess I'm just not feeling it. 

 

I do my husband's cards.  He writes something out in German and I copy it into the cards.  His handwriting is very bad so he appreciates me doing it. 

[regentrude]

I do like getting cards I guess because it feels like someone thought of me.  

 

yes, I guess that's what it is. Not even getting cards at least at Christmas feels like nobody cares that we exist.

Sometimes being an immigrant sucks. Christmas is one of those times.

Edited December 6, 2016 by regentrude

[SamanthaCarter]

I receive no letters, only photo cards. I used to tape the up but now I just pitch them as soon as I open them.

 

 

I throw them away too. It's a ME problem though. I think my kiddos are beautiful, but there's never anything in the budget for professional photography (or a good camera). I throw them away out of sheer jealousy for not having my own nice pictures. <blush>

[regentrude]

I scaled Christmas down a few years ago. I bake only three kinds of cookies, not six. I only decorate with a few traditional wood carved items - two nutcrackers, my Grandma's nativity, a pyramid. We stopped doing christmassy activities when the kids got older because they stopped caring.

I still cook a special meal (we have to eat anyway, might was well cook something nice), but that might be postponed or preponed depending on weather; we have gone hiking on CHristmas day in the past when it was nice and eaten the festive meal another day.

Edited December 6, 2016 by regentrude

[regentrude]

I throw them away too. It's a ME problem though. I think my kiddos are beautiful, but there's never anything in the budget for professional photography (or a good camera). I throw them away out of sheer jealousy for not having my own nice pictures. <blush>

 

you can do pretty nice pictures with a cell phone or a simple camera. I have never done professional pics.

[klmama]

Regentrude, I love receiving letters at Christmas.  I also like photo cards that have pictures of my friends on them, not just pictures of their children. 

[SparklyUnicorn]

yes, I guess that's what it is. Not even getting cards at least at Christmas feels like nobody cares that we exist.

Sometimes being an immigrant sucks. Christmas is one of those times.

 

I do understand.  My family is far and either way I don't have very many family members.  I have my dad who does come for xmas.  I haven't spoken to my sister in about 10 years.  My grandmother probably wouldn't know who I was (she had dementia).  Other family members have passed away.  A few more distantly related people I couldn't tell you where they are.  Then my husband's family all live in Germany.  So it's just him and our two and my dad.  Some years I feel motivated to make it feel special and some years I'd rather xmas just pass on by. 

 

That's one thing I do sorely wish we had.  Just more family and people we knew. 

[SparklyUnicorn]

Although I guess the tradition is my kids have been in one xmas themed show or another over the years.  They've done the Nutracker a few times.  One has been in a choir for three years and they always do a really nice show.  We went on Sunday and I really enjoyed that.

 

 

[El...]

I'm not doing cards.  I'm making a list of the people to whom I would have sent cards, and calling them as the month goes by.  It think this is better, because I actually hear how they are, rather than just showing off our good-lookin' family photo. 

 

I'm only making MY favorite treats (the kids are happy with what I like).  That means glog/spiced juice, cranberry apple pie with ice cream, and gingersnaps.  I might also make a very easy batch of fudge; actually, Dd will do that.

 

I'm helping the kids make little presents for the relatives we are going to see.

 

I ordered pretty much all gifts online.  I always do an Angel Tree gift card, and I even ordered those gifts online.  I did not overdo kid stuff, because frankly, they do not need a ton more stuff.  I had them help me with the Angel Tree stuff, because they need that experience.

 

I'm not sending presents to extended relatives.  I may change my mind at the last minute...  I just don't want to, and they don't acknowledge the gifts, so I'm never sure if they received them.  That does not give me a holiday-appropriate feeling.   

 

I'm traveling.  I'm just not going to decorate.  I'll get out the Christmas music, and I'll do something Christmas-y on our chalkboard. 

 

I'm watching all my favorite holiday movies, starting with Die Hard.  :hat:

 

Let's hear it for doing Christmas the way we want!!!

[Tess in the Burbs]

Reading through the thread, I am beginning to understand why I no longer receive cards. It's a bit sad to be on the receiving end of other people's simplifications, sigh.

Do those of you who cut out cards also not enjoy receiving them? Am I kidding myself when I think that me writing letters brings joy to the recipients? 

 

we have moved over the years, and I do enjoy receiving Christmas cards and reading about people.  These people are often on FB, but the whole story of the year is so nice to read through b/c I often don't know it all if I don't live near them.  But I've had friends tell me they don't read letters and such, so I'm down to sending cards but no long story in them anymore.  I feel ok letting people know I am thinking about them.  And I hope I get a card, but don't expect them anymore.  

[Sherry in OH]

I would love to receive photos from my friends whom I see only once a year, sometimes only every few years. And I thought they might like that too... apparently not?

 

I love the photo cards and save them.  I like the regular cards too but they get tossed in January.  We display the handful of cards we receive.  

 

We send fewer and fewer cards each year.  Most go to older relatives. A few of them will send us cards in return.  

[SKL]

I was just telling my younger sister - just do what you can *enjoy* doing each year.  It doesn't have to be the same "traditions" every year.

 

This year I hope to do Christmas cards, but some years they don't happen.  This year my kids did a gingerbread house and rode horses in the Christmas parade.  Last year they didn't.

 

This year we missed Operation Christmas Child and opted not to sell nuts for scouts.

 

This year I am skipping some community holiday events.  The one we usually go to conflicts with my kids' band concert.  I haven't looked into what other things are out there this year.  Maybe I still will, maybe not.

 

This year we are not traveling out of the country on Christmas, unlike the last 2 years.  We do plan to visit my folks on Christmas afternoon, and then we fly out a day or two later.  We're only going to one country this year, which is a first.  I won't be working like a maniac on New Year's Eve, because thankfully the 30th is the last business day this year.  :)

 

If we bake cookies, it will be because my kids take the initiative.

 

When my kids were little, I thought it would be fun to do St. Nicholas Day, advent calendars, "elf on the shelf," and/or Little Christmas.  But now I'm glad I never started any of those, because it would have made me crazy trying to keep up with that along with everything else.

 

I think we do plenty though.  The kids have 3 church/school programs that they've been practicing for over the past month.  We have lovely Christmas books and movies to get us into the mood.  We will decorate modestly.  I have a few other ideas, but as long as we get the tree up and gifts under it, I'm not going to get hung up on anything else.

[SKL]

I like getting Christmas cards.  I don't keep the cards forever, but I do enjoy decorating with them over the Christmas season.

 

I do try to send Christmas cards with photos of my kids.  Sometimes it doesn't happen because it's such a crazy season.  I missed it last year, so I really want to do it this year - the sooner the better.  :)

[Cinder]

We haven't done cards or gifts for extended family in ages--since that time dh was unemployed for over a year. At that time, SIL suggested we all forgo exchanging gifts; I think it was probably a relief for all and being unemployed was a good excuse to bring it up without being awkward.

 

I still do a few handmade gifts, but just for immediate family and my MIL & SILs who are also knit-worthy.

 

We will still do Christmas cookies but we only do one kind--triple batch, though.

 

Dd's small private school has come up with an alternative to the teacher gift where they ask those who want to give a gift to just give cash. There's a form to designate which teachers you're giving to. The PTF collects and disburses it as a "stocking stuffer/Christmas bonus".  Saves parents time and effort; gives teachers something they can all easily and gladly use.

[littlebug42]

I had to give up Christmas cards when I went from working part time to full time.  Just not enough time. 

 

My family decided to simplify our get together this year.  We are focusing on being together and not what we eat while we are together.  So, it is pizza for Christmas eve for us this year.  We will make a dessert or two and throw in a salad and we are done.  We draw names for Christmas so it limits our  gift purchasing.  

 

We are hosting dh's family on Christmas day but I am just doing appetizer type food.  Maybe a ham and some buns for sandwiches.  Nothing overly taxing.  My BIL, his wife, DH and I are forgoing getting each other gifts for a double date some evening where we can spend time together.  

 

I did get my real tree this year for the first time since I was a kid.  I love it.  Makes me happy.  Focusing on the people more than the details makes me feel a lot better about Christmas.  My kids love it so I want to do what makes us all happy. 

[MysteryJen]

After a late term miscarriage (with the baby's due date of Christmas) 10 years ago, I just stopped doing most of Christmas. No cards, no cookies, no parties, no pressure. The kids open up the small box of decorations, do the tree, creche, stockings, etc. Mostly Christmas is relaxing and we have whittled down gift giving as well. Stocking happen on St. Nicholas Day and usually the kids get one or two small things under the tree and one big gift that can come anytime. Like a bike or special meet trip.

 

I used to love Christmas, and now, well, it is sadder. 

[Kassia]

I would love to receive photos from my friends whom I see only once a year, sometimes only every few years. And I thought they might like that too... apparently not?

 

I love receiving photos from friends!  I hang them up during the holidays and then I keep them forever.

 

Before facebook, I sent out a lot of cards with photos, but now I just send cards/photos to people I'm not facebook friends with.  But I am delighted to receive pictures!  They really make me happy.  

 

ETA:  I am very sorry for those of you who associate Christmas with sad things.   :grouphug:  :grouphug:

Edited December 6, 2016 by Erica H

[HS Mom in NC]

I think the annual letter can get different reactions depending on content and tone.  I know people who hate them and call them "brag sheets" because it's a list of accomplishments of each family member.  I know people who love them because they're nice updates on what's going on with them.

[SKL]

I've never done a Christmas letter, though I've thought about it.  When it comes time to sit down and write, it seems my information is either too boring, too personal, or too braggy to share that way.  A picture is worth 1000 words, so I figure if I enclose one or two of those, we're good.  Facebook is good for keeping interested people up to date on what we're doing, without being "in your face."  If you were my fb friend, you would see my kids' major accomplishments / milestones, our travels, and occasional posts that show where my mind is these days.  That's probably all I'd put in an annual letter anyway.

 

This year we've done a few things I'm excited about, but they are not things to share with the whole world.