craftymama Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 when they find out I am a SAHM. when they find out I homeschool. when they find out I like to do crafts. when it comes out that I do not have any desire to go back to school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Because they don't know what to say. You are outside the box they are in and they don't know what box to put you in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Because they aren't creative enough to come up with a question or positive, "interested" comment. Your turn to continue the conversation by bringing it back to something all moms / women can relate to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aiden Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Kewb is right. Also, while some people will look down on you because they don't value the choices you've made, many will feel intimidated by you because what you are able to do makes them feel inadequate. (They don't really like being with their dc all day and worry they are poor parents, they don't feel smart enough to teach their dc themselves, and the extent of their crafting ability involves helping their dc put glue on popsicle sticks to make school projects.) I've found that the conversation doesn't have to end if I jump in with questions about what they do for a living, what they like about their dc's schools, or what they do for relaxation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Kewb is right. Also, while some people will look down on you because they don't value the choices you've made, many will feel intimidated by you because what you are able to do makes them feel inadequate. (They don't really like being with their dc all day and worry they are poor parents, they don't feel smart enough to teach their dc themselves, and the extent of their crafting ability involves helping their dc put glue on popsicle sticks to make school projects.) I've found that the conversation doesn't have to end if I jump in with questions about what they do for a living, what they like about their dc's schools, or what they do for relaxation. All that is to be gathered from...silence? Really? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momof3littles Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I understand. Once my kids were obviously school age, it became an issue. I'd meet new people at the pool, extracurriculars, etc. and we'd be chatting it up. As soon as HSing came up, the conversation would turn to crickets chirping. I wouldn't bring it up, but once your kids are of a certain age, people ask where they attend school, and well, it is unavoidable. I always keep it breezy and light (when asked why I just say it is a good fit for our family or something very non controversial!) but then the conversation would shut down. I think people automatically make assumptions about whether I am religious, what my political affiliation is, or that I hate public schools, or secretly wear my denim jumper at home because I HS. It has gotten easier for me over time, but I definitely have had conversations that were going really well until someone asks where my kid goes to school and then all of the sudden I am assigned a set of values that probably has nothing to do with my personal beliefs. And I definitely keep it totally light, breezy, and noncontroversial when I reply. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SproutMamaK Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Because they don't know what to say. You are outside the box they are in and they don't know what box to put you in. I think exactly the opposite, actually. She fits very neatly in a "stereotypical homeschooler" box (no offense intended as I have all those traits as well), and therefore people think they know everything about her already. They've put the check marks down for those facts, determined that they can fit you into one particular frame of reference, and that you hold no further interest for them. I REALLY hope that doesn't sound like I'm insulting you because I'm not; I think it's scummy of people to assume that they know everything about someone just because you happen to line up with a few of their untested presumptions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laughing lioness Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I have been a stay at homeschooling Mom for 20 yrs with 2 master's degrees. In that time I blogged, did reviews, read a book a week, organized and started events and programs. Yet not having a place of employment in answer to the inevitable question, "Where do you work?" always left me feeling rather non-existent because blank stares and zero response were de rigeur. I went back to work last fall, as a professional in Jan. Having a professional title/ position as a response garners far more interest than having a white trash job, but still, I've received FAR more responses and seeming respect just having a PLACE of employment. Since I've been at work I have been told on more than one occasion that because I could afford to stay home I was "rich" (I totally missed that memo!)and at least some of the women whom I've worked wtih are "jealous" because I had that option. Just mentioning I work, when I turned in my homeschool exemption at the local public school caused the school secretary to launch into a confidential conversation with me, whereas in years past she has been ice cold. Being a stay at home mom/homeschooler is a weird combo of luxery and out there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Here's a crib sheet to pass out: I love my job! I could never do that! What about socialization? What about college? Don't you need a teaching degree? I hate crafts, especially scrap booking. Such a waste of trees. Oh, can you make me one? Wow! That's too expensive. I can get those in the dollar bins at Target. That's so sad! I've failed the bar exam twice, but third time's the charm! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimson Wife Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Ditto except that I'm currently in the process of preparing to apply to grad school. Oh, people LOVE to talk about that! I guess getting a degree for essentially what I'm doing now for my own child suddenly makes that activity "legitimate" (I'm looking into educational therapy/academic language therapy). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 when they find out I am a SAHM. when they find out I homeschool. when they find out I like to do crafts. when it comes out that I do not have any desire to go back to school. Because they are not as smart as you and don't have anything to contribute? because they are jealous? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I think that some people may feel judged (instead of judging) just by your presence. I used to have a vegetarian roommate, and I felt judged by eating meat around her. I was 24, young and self-conscious, what can I say. She was not judgmental, but that didn't matter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Tick Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I think they just don't have a "next question" ready. Try shifting the topic to something they know about (them, usually). Then the conversation can continue while they process this unusual information. If I am successful then sometimes they come back later with a relevant question. I'm a SAHM and I don't always have a good "next question" either. What I want to ask is "Yes, but what do you do all day -hobbies, chores, read, shopping, t.v., teach, train for a sporting event, other...?" But we all know how well that question goes over. :-) Instead I tend to wait and see if they offer me a hint. Some days I handle it all better than others, I assume that is the same for everybody. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneStepAtATime Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Yes to it all. And yes, sometimes they are putting you into a preconceived box and sometimes homeschooling is so foreign to them they don't even know what box to put you in. I have run into both scenarios. I try hard to keep it light, turn the topic back to something they can relate to, etc. unless they genuinely seem interested in learning more about homeschooling. And yes, my worthiness seemed to drop off the map for MANY people we know when I became a SAHM. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Wow, what a lot of negativity against non-homeschoolers I see above! Really? Working moms dislike their kids and are afraid to try to teach them? And too stupid to find something to say? Or maybe we just think you people are losers? Come on. The art of conversation, lesson 101, ask the other person about herself. The other person never fails to have something to say about his/her own interests. People ask me what I do (for work), and I hesitate. Because what I do is hard to capsulize in a short answer. It too is a conversation stopper. Nobody I talk to (outside of my business colleagues) has any experience in what I do for a living. It is not because other women are stupid, it's because my job doesn't lend itself well to lay conversation. Maybe yours doesn't either. Find something else to talk about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Because they aren't creative enough to come up with a question or positive, "interested" comment. Your turn to continue the conversation by bringing it back to something all moms / women can relate to. This. They often just don't know what to say. I've found that asking questions and being interested in what they do tends to (eventually) lead to questions on their part about homeschooling, in particular. I think sometimes, to give the benefit of the doubt, people have so little information or experience that they just don't know what to ask and are afraid of asking dumb questions, so they don't say anything. Like "What about socialization?" :P Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gaillardia Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I can relate to what several of you have posted, or I agree with you. Funny how we can group a lot of people together in a box that seem aghast to home schooling. I say aghast as opposed to against, not sure which works better. Lately I've had more of a positive response when I answer that we home school. I guess the "older" people are talking to me more than the young moms. I've learned how to not respond to some questions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaqui Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 People often talk about the things they have in common. They might hear all those things and, since they don't have those areas in common with you, run out of new things to say. They might also be concerned, if all this comes out at once, that they're making you uncomfortable by continuing to accidentally bring up things that make you different and worried that they don't know how to unawkwardly move to a subject where you fit in. Or they might assume you're judging them, or think they're judging you. People can be so strange about differences! They might hear "I homeschool" and translate that to "because I love my kids more than you love yours", or turn "I do crafts" into "I'm more creative than you!" or, on the other hand, hear "I'm not interested into going back to school" as "please don't think I'm stupid!" Or they might just be mannerless nitwits. No way to tell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I have an acquaintance who is a coroner by trade. I wonder how she gets through social gatherings. LOL. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChocolateReignRemix Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 when they find out I am a SAHM. when they find out I homeschool. when they find out I like to do crafts. when it comes out that I do not have any desire to go back to school. Because they don't have a lot in common with you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiana Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I have an acquaintance who is a coroner by trade. I wonder how she gets through social gatherings. LOL. She probably hears a lot of "well, I hope I don't need YOUR services soon!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momof3littles Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I've had situations where I guess people don't know what to say or have clearly categorized me into a box immediately. But I've also had the times when they start interrogating. "Do you have a teaching degree?" "Who do you report to?" "Socialization?" or just a flat out, "I don't agree with HSing." Sometimes I'm baffled, because it is very aggressive at times! Fortunately this hasn't happened often, but then when I have the more benign crickets-chirping conversations, I wonder if the "aggressive" string of things is running through their head, kwim? I think some people just don't know what to say, but I definitely have been in situations where I clearly think I've been put into a box immediately with respect to what people assume about my religious beliefs, politics, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I've never experienced this. The conversation shouldn't just end. If the other person knows nothing about homeschooling, it's on you to elaborate on that topic. After that, you ask them about their work and they talk for a while. Then you move on to kids, family, weather, hobbies, news, etc . . . I can't imagine a conversation just stopping abruptly because I told someone I homeschool. I really can't imagine this happening regularly. Something is off here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snow Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Do you try to continue the conversation by telling them more about these things after you've said it? If I sense they don't know what to say or are oddly quiet (provided they are someone I'm interested in talking to, I start telling them about it more. What's fun or hard about it, an interesting thing I've learned or a project I'm working and then turn back to them with a question. Are you trying to be conversational? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mango Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 ...or that you don't have any credentials or title except for "Mom." :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strange_girl Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Because they don't have a lot in common with you? This. Plain and simple. It's no good wondering if they are judging you or are envious of you...the point is they have no practical experience with your lifestyle and therefore cannot comment on it. Just as I can't comment on public school...I've never been in one and neither have my kids. I simply don't know what it's like in reality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemiSweet Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 This hasn't been my experience either. I think a conversation relies on all parties involved to keep it going. So if the conversation wanes and you want to continue it, you must make that effort. The box thing could be true, but isn't necessarily. It's hard to say without knowing you personally. Maybe I haven't experienced it because I don't look like I belong in that box with my tattoos and piercings. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 This hasn't been my experience either. I think a conversation relies on all parties involved to keep it going. So if the conversation wanes and you want to continue it, you must make that effort. Never assume negative intent. They may just be mentally searching for some common ground about which to talk. So you say, "What about you? Where do your kids go to school? Where do you work? Is that interesting? I love your purse. That's so cute! How old are your kids? ooo, that's a fun age! What are they into? Are they looking forward to going back to school? Do you have a hobby? ....." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 When they find out I'm a SAHM, and homeschooling, I just laugh and point out the "boxes." Most people we meet can tell from our prior conversation up to that point, what we're doing, who we're with, etc. that I don't fit the boxes. I guess, maybe, just don't let the conversation stop. We have new-ish friends who are PS teachers, and are not fans of homeschool. At all. But they get why we homeschool, and now they see we're real people, and I think they're okay with it. Either that or they are trying to save our educational souls with their presence. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momof3littles Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I feel like I assume positive intent. I can keep a conversation going. But there are times to me it feels like sometimes the conversation takes a very chilly turn after HSing is mentioned. I mean, I'm not the world's most brilliant conversationalist, but I'm an introvert who isn't shy and doesn't mind talking one on one at all. I definitely talk to people about their lives, interests, look for common ground, talk about things common to most parents. Most of the time I don't get that chilly reception, but I have definitely been in conversations where it is apparent the person is no longer super interested in chatting with me if I'm a HSer. It isn't the majority of the time, but I've definitely experienced it. One woman at the pool literally grilled me and then basically turned her body away from me. I mean, i stick to pretty bland and boring on the whys and hows when people press, and keep it light and non offensive, but I recall getting grilled and then having her literally turn her body away from me while we were sitting at the same table. At that point I didn't have an interest in trying to reel her back into the conversation. I am just saying that while OP may need to practice keeping the conversation going or keeping it light about HSing, I can relate to it sometimes shutting down a conversation or things taking a chillier turn after it is mentioned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momof3littles Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 When they find out I'm a SAHM, and homeschooling, I just laugh and point out the "boxes." Most people we meet can tell from our prior conversation up to that point, what we're doing, who we're with, etc. that I don't fit the boxes. I guess, maybe, just don't let the conversation stop. We have new-ish friends who are PS teachers, and are not fans of homeschool. At all. But they get why we homeschool, and now they see we're real people, and I think they're okay with it. Either that or they are trying to save our educational souls with their presence. :lol: I've found proactively joking about this to be helpful as well. I think it has helped. And yes, once people know you are more than one dimension it helps tremendously. For us it has mostly just occasionally been an issue with the first time we meet people at extracurriculars or the pool or something. If we get past that point, things are usually fine and we form a friendship or are congenial. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momacacia Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Because you mentioned crafts. The crafts are what did it. :sleep: I'd turn you over to my 9yo and the two of you could chat crafts and knitting and . . . I don't know what. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 BTW, OP, I bet we could all find lots to talk about with you. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momacacia Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Really, you should continue on with the most interesting book you're currently reading or have read recently. "Oh, have you read <insert title of classic tome>? It's excellent! I love the part where . . . . and how the author . . . ." If they haven't read it, then they can feel dumb. If people don't want to hold a conversation with me, I just quit. I'm just too old and tired for this anymore. I'm a very conversationalist and am genuinely interested in people. I have a law degree, practiced in an interesting albeit politically heated (which makes it even more interesting) area of law in Washington, DC and traveled extensively in my 20s. I'm a really interesting person, but you know what--other people don't know how to ask questions, or make conversation or be interested in other people. So . . . . it ends. And, I'm done carrying the load of the conversation and being all interested in them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustEm Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Sometimes I prefer the conversation ending over hearing the dumb comments like "oh I could never do that" "staying home is so much harder than working" "I assume you won't home school high school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftymama Posted August 14, 2014 Author Share Posted August 14, 2014 Thank you all for the varying points of view. These things are not being given as a laundry list they are coming up in regular conversation... they ask what school my kids go to...I say we homeschool. I say what about yours, which school district are you in, or something like that - homeschooling isn't for everyone, I'm not trying to convince anyone they need to do it. The question I most often get (one the rare occasion I get one) is actually about how I find curriculum. they ask what my hobbies are...I say I do a lot of crafts; I take a lot of pictures; I travel when I can and then ask about theirs (unless, of course, we started there) - I know a lot of people are not into crafts and the conversation could end there. Unless they ask more questions I just leave it and try to go back to them or something more universal. Traveling was much more interesting before the move; here everyone travels. they ask about my job...I tell them I'm a SAHM because I am...Often on this one I don't get the chance to continue... And the school thing, I really don't know...why does it matter to anyone else? Though I find that if someone is in the process of going back to get their degree it is a bigger conversation ender. I have had people walk away from me, turn their body, close the gap so I'm not longer in the group It used to be I could talk to anyone, but now I feel like it is always a fight to stay in the conversation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I have had people walk away from me, turn their body, close the gap so I'm not longer in the group It used to be I could talk to anyone, but now I feel like it is always a fight to stay in the conversation. Do you think this is community specific? In our community, homeschooling is fairly common. The usual response I get to telling people we homeschool is something along the lines of, "That's great. My niece/neighbor/friend/cousin's hairdresser homeschools." They still treat me just like a regular person. ;) It makes me wonder what negative stereotype they must be thinking of to feel so negative about someone else's schooling choices. :( You know, once a long time ago, I was at a birthday party with my young daughter, sitting in a semicircle of chairs with the other parents, and the hostess turned her chair so that the circle was closed and her back was to me. Then after the party, she said something to me about how I hadn't really joined in with the group. Um, duh. What was I supposed to do, make a big stink about her shutting me out? But I don't think she was even aware that she'd done that, and believed that I was sitting outside the now closed circle by choice. (She was a piece of work, so it wasn't like I wanted to be bff's 4ever anyway.) My point being (there is one!) I wonder if people are uncomfortable for whatever reasons of their own, and don't mean to consciously exclude you but they do it anyway. Which still stinks. :( Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigMamaBird Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 A friend posted this on FB today. "What do you do?" is just so easy and pre-packaged. http://storylineblog.com/2014/08/12/a-better-way-to-introduce-your-friends-at-parties/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 How do you feel about vegetarians? Atheists ? These are topics I've learned to deftly elude among casual acquaintances. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Sounds like you just need to find out what folks like to talk about in your new community, from listening in. That's pretty much what I do. In any mom group, I am always the outsider. I was past 40 when I became a mom and before that, I was basically a workaholic. Even my hobbies were weird. I don't have a husband or in-laws to talk about. Never been pregnant and my kids' experience is unusual too. So does that make me interesting or boring? Usually boring. But if I want to talk, I listen to figure out what they want to talk about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momacacia Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I think the SAHM thing is hard. What are they supposed to say to that? "What did you cook for dinner last night? Ooh, show me your cleanng schedule?!" Where is a discussion of that job title supposed to lead? And I think SAHMs ahve to be ok with it going nowhere. Because after all, it is a dead end job unless you want to babysit or be a nanny. No one asks," Oh what type of SAHM are you? (Like a doctor might get asked) or What projects do you manage? (If they're a "project manager)" It's very rude of people to shut you out of a conversation or physically edge you out of a circle. I wouldn't want to hold a conversation or develop a relationship with people like that anyway. A 4th grader should know to behave better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I have never had the conversation stop when I say I homeschool or because I am a SAHM. The other two topics I can't comment on because I don't do crafts and I have all the schooling I need (2 MAs). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wintermom Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I'm not sure how your conversations develop, but it would take a lot of questions to discover all those things about you. So, perhaps they've asked enough and are ready for you to find some commonality between you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KrissiK Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 It doesn't have to end. Like so many other have mentioned, shift the conversation back to the other person. I hate talking about myself anyhow, so I try to have a bunch of questions up my sleeve. Although I will admit, sometimes it is hard. Really hard when you don't have anything in common. We had a young woman come to our church a while back. She was a single mom, had 3 daughters and was pregnant with the 4th, she was about 20 years younger than me. I really tried. I racked my brains every Sunday to think of something to say to her, to try to strike up a conversation... but things were really awkward. Sh had to leave town so she doesn't go to our church any more, but I always kind of look back at that and wonder what I could have done differently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alicia64 Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I understand. Once my kids were obviously school age, it became an issue. I'd meet new people at the pool, extracurriculars, etc. and we'd be chatting it up. As soon as HSing came up, the conversation would turn to crickets chirping. Yep. I hate to say it and I didn't want to think it, but people "turn off" when I casually -- because I don't think it's a big deal -- say we homeschool. By "people" I generally mean neighbors. We're in a "really good school district" so hs friends have said that they take it badly that we're not in their "really good school." I often fight within myself thinking this can't be true, but I think I'm being Pollyanna not to acknowledge some of this prejudice. We're all so used to homeschooling, talking about homeschooling, living, eating, breathing homeschooling that it's not a big deal to us. It is a big deal to others. Alley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 Wow, what a lot of negativity against non-homeschoolers I see above! Really? Working moms dislike their kids and are afraid to try to teach them? And too stupid to find something to say? Or maybe we just think you people are losers? Come on. I don't think working moms dislike their kids at all. However, I do know many who have clearly stated to me they couldn't homeschool because they couldn't spend all day with their kids or that they aren't smart enough to do it. I think most of them could handle it, but they don't think they could or just don't want to. It isn't negativity against non-homeschoolers to acknowledge things they say about themselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I have never once had a parent say she didn't think she was smart enough to homeschool her children. I HAVE heard the no patience comment, but not the intelligence one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I don't think working moms dislike their kids at all. However, I do know many who have clearly stated to me they couldn't homeschool because they couldn't spend all day with their kids or that they aren't smart enough to do it. I think most of them could handle it, but they don't think they could or just don't want to. It isn't negativity against non-homeschoolers to acknowledge things they say about themselves. Most likely these people are trying unsuccessfully to find something polite to say in response to "I homeschool." They don't know enough about the topic to say "so how do you decide what curriculum to use" or "what part of your house to you use as a schoolroom." They are awkward for the same reason people are awkward trying to talk about my job. (So I don't leave them struggling, I change the subject.) Though there are times it is trying to have no break from our kids, and times when we're not sure we're doing the right thing by them. Some homeschoolers have said these things also. I just thought the tone of many comments was ironic considering the OP was apparently about feeling judged or undervalued. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted August 14, 2014 Share Posted August 14, 2014 I have never once had a parent say she didn't think she was smart enough to homeschool her children. I HAVE heard the no patience comment, but not the intelligence one. I have heard this a couple of times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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