What's your personal "What About Socialization?"

[Forget-Me-Not]

And I know this one sounds really harsh, but it is the context:

"Can I Pray with You?"

 

I am not talking close friends, family, etc., but random people. I swear people will come up a grocery store aisle, see me shopping and stop dead. We have lots of kids at the Uni here (private Baptist) that will go into public places and look around to see who they can pray for. Why, oh why, is it always me?!! In the frozen food section to boot?!

 

I've had this happen a couple of times too. Both times it was a young guy (different cities, different guys) in his twenties claiming to know something about me and wanting to pray for me. I'm religious and I believe in prayer, but this approach just completely repelled me and set my radar off big time. Both times I declined the offer.

[Kerileanne99]

Exactly. I always tell them my kids don't think prom is worth sitting through 4 years of high school.

Ah, but maybe they might change their minds if they knew they were missing out on the KFC corsage for prom from the other threadðŸ˜

[KrissiK]

"You homeschool? I could never do that!" (You could if it's something you really wanted to do!)

"You have five kids? How do you manage?" (I don't have a choice. They all must be fed and clothed. I can't hide under the bed all day)

"Where are your kids from?" (They're all adopted. But that doesn't mean they're all from a different country.)

[Soapy]

My s-i-l would probably say hers is "are they identical"~~ asked about her boy/girl twins. I would have never believed her if I didn't hear two people ask her in one shopping trip...

 

I can't believe how often I've been asked this.  I never know what to say... I want to say except for the penis, but I never do. :)

[MysteryJen]

We have gotten "what about prom?" many, many times. Actually my dd2 went to prom last weekend with a friend and had a blast. Another friend from swim team didn't get an invitation and said, "I can't believe I am going to be sitting at home for prom. Even the homeschooled girl is going!"  :lol:

 

The one I no longer have patience for is "don't you need permission from the school district to homeschool?" Nope, it is still, shockingly a free country.

[Soror]

"Are you having any more?" "How many kids are you going to have?"

 

Really wonderful when you are having a stressed out day. I don't mind, "Your hands are full!," even though I hear it all the time. 

[Chelli]

"Did you play basketball/volleyball in high school?"

 

Because I'm 5'10" and obviously if you are tall, then you MUST have played sports in high school. I politely inform them that I was on the golf team my junior and senior year, which usually shocks them even more. 

 

"What does your husband do?" 

 

I dread this question because dh is a minister. It's not that I mind his being a preacher, but the minute I tell someone his job they suddenly feel the need to tell me all of the wonderful holy and religious things they've been doing. "Well, I go to church every Sunday." "I really enjoyed the Beth Moore Bible study I did three years ago." The best is if we've been carrying the conversation for a while before they ask the question. Then you can actually see the wheels turning in their head trying to remember everything they've said (did I curse? did I say OMG? did I gossip? did I confess to drunkenness, fornication, etc.) as if I have some special line to God since I'm a preacher's wife and will call down fire upon their heads. It makes it very difficult to make friends, but I'm not the God police. Some people just don't get it.

 

"Well, you finally got  your boy!" 

 

Not a question, but it makes me want to scream since it's usually said right in front of my daughters as if they were just mistakes until we could get what we really wanted. I've told dh more than once that I want to have one more kid just so people will not assume we stopped having children because we had a son.

 

"Do you dye his hair?"

 

EVERY time I take my son in for a haircut the person who cuts his hair asks if we dye it. It is a very unusual shade of strawberry blond, but it's in patches on his head. I call him my calico cat because he'll have a patch of red hair, then a patch of blonde, then a patch that's mixed. The question just makes me wonder if hair dressers encounter a lot of four year olds with dyed hair. 

[shawthorne44]

Oh that reminds me of one -- "Where did his red hair come from?" How on earth am I supposed to know? Is that even an answerable question? The genes don't come labelled with provenance, as far as I know. I mean, I'm polite and say the right things, and I've probably even asked other people the same question in the past. But after hearing the same question over and over for 13 years, it eventually dawned on me how stupid it was.

 

ETA: I guess I've probably only heard the question for 11 years. He was bald for the first two years!

 

I am a redhead with brown haired parents.  They said sometimes it was said with a tone of "someone must have had an affair" tone.  From a young age I piped up, "From my Grandfather.  He hardly has any anymore".  Both of which were true.  

[Home'scool]

When I used to get the question "But how do they get into college without a high school diploma?" I would looked startled, then panicky, then say "Oh my God! I have to call my husband right away!! We have so screwed over our kids!!"
 

Do people really think I hadn't looked into getting into college without the traditional high school diploma?!?! D'oh!

[Jenny in Florida]

As a long-time vegetarian/vegan, I'm very tired of being asked where I get my protein.

 

The answer is, "from food."

[inmyopinion]

"I could never do that."  - Yes, that's probably true.  Don't try, really.  It's not for everyone.   :)

 

And the one I get every. single. time. it's mentioned that we homeschool: "Where do you go to church?"  Really? Homeschooling = church?  Apparently in our area it does.  We don't attend a church, and the moment that I mention that there is a stunned silence as people process the fact that we don't homeschool for religious reasons.  I never could have imagined that this would be our most common question.  

I have to say I am guilty of this.  Our local homeschool group has pockets of homeschoolers in quite a few of the local churches so many times I will ask a newer member where they go to church and most times can say "so-and-so goes there and homeschools."  I never thought it would be offensive but I also ask where in town they live and where they work.  I guess I see it as a way to link them with fellow homeschoolers.  

[inmyopinion]

Someone asked if I put highlights in dd1's hair as a toddler.

 

I have also been asked "how will you still be their mom if you are their teacher" (I think it was supposed to be how will you balance things, but still) this was from my mom.

I got the highlights question with my daughter as her hair changed from black to blonde she had some amazing color.   Of course, with three under 4 at the time, I was lucky I bathed them, never mind coloring anyone's hair.  

[Spryte]

I have to say I am guilty of this. Our local homeschool group has pockets of homeschoolers in quite a few of the local churches so many times I will ask a newer member where they go to church and most times can say "so-and-so goes there and homeschools." I never thought it would be offensive but I also ask where in town they live and where they work. I guess I see it as a way to link them with fellow homeschoolers.

Not offensive. :) I'm hard to offend anyway. Don't worry if you've done it. It just shocked me that the two must go hand in hand. And I get asked it every time we're out. So it gets old.

 

It's not offensive usually, but it depends where the conversation goes after that. If the conversation suddenly stops, parent turns away from us & calls kids away... Which does happen ... That isn't nice. It's hurtful to DS, and makes me sad. We once had a kid at the playground tell DS he's going to hell. DS handled it well. Another time, a mom and I had made plans to meet up again at the pool for a first time play date. After that, the church question came up, it wandered into "my pastor called us to homeschool" and then somehow to my (orthodox) Jewish family... And they never showed up for our play date, nor did they respond to emails. That was the worst, because it hurt DS's feelings.

 

Mostly though, I just countdown till the question is asked when we meet people.

[a27mom]

Comments/questions where people assume I only wanted to have 2 kids and am done having children because I have the magic number 2. Yes I only have 2 kids, no it doesn't appear likely that I will have more, but that isn't my choice.

 

Oh, I hate "what about prom"!

 

Because we all know that people who don't go to prom are irreparably harmed for life due to the profound disappointment of NOT going to prom! :glare:

Honestly the first time someone asked me about "prom". I thought I was agreeing with them saying how no prom was just one of the benefits of homeschooling ;). The inane drama surrounding prom annoyed me in high school, so I am glad my girls won't have to deal with it. I didn't go to prom, and I had no idea people seemed to think it so essential. ( BTW I was/am not opposed to prom for religious reasons, I just don't see the point. )

[umsami]

"Where are you from??"  (Because I wear hijab.)

 

So, I answer, "Michigan."

 

Then I usually get,  "No I mean, really from???"

 

So then I say, "Well, really Michigan, I was born in Detroit."

 

Then possibly….I'll get "What about your parents??"

 

And then I usually say, "Well, on my Dad's side, we go back to the Mayflower. On my Mom's side, she's French, Italian and German…her family came over in the 19th century….but I think the answer you're looking for is I converted. "

 

 

[Laura Corin]

 

"Do they speak the local language?" (Even after hearing the kids do so! People are weird!)

 

 

I several times had people in China ask me if I spoke Chinese, even when I had already been talking to them for a bit and they had understood me and replied.  I honestly don't know where that came from.

 

L

[Barb_]

I have to say I am guilty of this. Our local homeschool group has pockets of homeschoolers in quite a few of the local churches so many times I will ask a newer member where they go to church and most times can say "so-and-so goes there and homeschools." I never thought it would be offensive but I also ask where in town they live and where they work. I guess I see it as a way to link them with fellow homeschoolers.

I'm not the OP on this remark, but I don't find the question offensive so much as awkward. I can always tell when the reply, "We don't attend church" has flown like a lead balloon. Either the person in question misunderstands and invites me to her church (all the more awkward, because now I have to explain that I'm really not interested in church shopping), suddenly grows cold and remembers she has other things to do, or feels awkward herself because she thinks maybe she had offended me. It's sort of the reverse of the preacher's wife thing upthread. Rarely, someone will quickly recover and our lovely conversation will continue. Most of the time it just stays weird after that.

[Barb_]

I'm short too. Maybe not as short, I don't know. But it's funny that I really don't notice it until I see someone very short. And then I think ....oh my...am I REALLY THAT short? LOL

I'll bet you're bigger on the inside :D

[regentrude]

 

"What does your husband do?" 

 

I dread this question because dh is a minister. It's not that I mind his being a preacher, but the minute I tell someone his job they suddenly feel the need to tell me all of the wonderful holy and religious things they've been doing. "Well, I go to church every Sunday." "I really enjoyed the Beth Moore Bible study I did three years ago." The best is if we've been carrying the conversation for a while before they ask the question. Then you can actually see the wheels turning in their head trying to remember everything they've said (did I curse? did I say OMG? did I gossip? did I confess to drunkenness, fornication, etc.) as if I have some special line to God since I'm a preacher's wife and will call down fire upon their heads. It makes it very difficult to make friends, but I'm not the God police. Some people just don't get it.

 

Oh the reactions I get when somebody asks me "What do you do?" ... My reply "I teach physics" is almost always answered with a groan and a remark along the lines of "I was so bad at/never understood/ hated... physics in high school".

Or "you must be so smart" , which is probably meant as a compliment, but there is no gracious way to accept that  - you don't say "thanks, I know".

 

Very very occasionally somebody responds "wow. How cool!". I'd like to hug those people.

[Runningmom80]

I have more! The twin thing really brings out cliches. ;)

 

"You must be busy."

"You have your hands full."

"I couldn't handle twins." (News flash, no one thinks they can!)

 

"Are they identical?" (THEY ARE A BOY AND A GIRL.)

[Alice]

Last time that happened, my mom happened to be visiting, so I gave her the phone. :) Other than that, I tell them they have the wrong number and hang up on them. It happens much less now that we're on the Do Not Call list.

 

 

Fortunately, as DS gets older, people are less inclined to ask whether we're going to have more. Now I only have the "he's tall" comments.

 

I also must have a young sounding voice. I either get people who know me and mistake me for my 10 year old son or sales calls who "if my mother is home". If they ask for my mother I tell them she isn't home. Technically, it's true. :)

 

"Well, you finally got  your boy!" 

 

Not a question, but it makes me want to scream since it's usually said right in front of my daughters as if they were just mistakes until we could get what we really wanted. I've told dh more than once that I want to have one more kid just so people will not assume we stopped having children because we had a son.

 

 

 

Exact same thing, but with two boys and a girl. We didn't find out for any of the pregnancies and with the third I got so sick of the "trying for a girl!" comments. We knew that the third would be our last and I kind of wanted a boy just to avoid all the assumptions that we were stopping because we "finally got a girl". 

 

"Where are you from??"  (Because I wear hijab.)

 

So, I answer, "Michigan."

 

Then I usually get,  "No I mean, really from???"

 

So then I say, "Well, really Michigan, I was born in Detroit."

 

Then possibly….I'll get "What about your parents??"

 

And then I usually say, "Well, on my Dad's side, we go back to the Mayflower. On my Mom's side, she's French, Italian and German…her family came over in the 19th century….but I think the answer you're looking for is I converted. "

 

Dh is Chinese-American. He was born and raised in Indiana. He gets asked a lot where he is from. He answers Indiana. Sometimes he takes pity on the person and says "but my ethnicity is Chinese if that's what you mean." 

 

A few months ago someone here posted this video which he and I both got a huge kick out of: 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWynJkN5HbQ

 

Oh the reactions I get when somebody asks me "What do you do?" ... My reply "I teach physics" is almost always answered with a groan and a remark along the lines of "I was so bad at/never understood/ hated... physics in high school".

Or "you must be so smart" , which is probably meant as a compliment, but there is no gracious way to accept that  - you don't say "thanks, I know".

 

Very very occasionally somebody responds "wow. How cool!". I'd like to hug those people.

 

 I get "Oh, I thought about being a doctor except for all the science." all the time when people find out what I do. I'm likewise not sure how to answer that. 

[trulycrabby]

Gee, I must be very mean and scary-looking, because no one ever asks me any questions. :o

[Χά�ων]

I get "He doesn't look sick." Umm yeah there is a reason for the term invisable illness.

 

And

 

But he seemed fine when he was here yesterday for two hours so he must be fine." Uhh yeah, sitting around talking more than doing anything physical and really two hours ia not an accurate sample.

 

And

 

"How can he play sports if he has that?" I want to say 'How can you be so stupid and still breathe?' I mean good god you would think I said he was on thr professional level. Sheesh.

[Kerileanne99]

As a long-time vegetarian/vegan, I'm very tired of being asked where I get my protein.

 

The answer is, "from food."

I get this all the time too! I have been veggie all my life (or rather, from age 5).

If someone seems really interested I might have a brief conversation about it...but here in Texas it seems to be almost a sin, lol.

Sometimes I will admit to just waving a hand dismissively and saying something like, "oh, I never worry about it. We just eat cheese pizza and junk food."

 

And now it is worse with a child...for some, raising a child as a vegetarian is akin to child abuse. Never mind the months of research we did, the food journal we keep (in no small part to worries about outside opinions), the semi-annual bloodwork we have done for her 'just to be sure', and the pediatric nutritionist we see every 3 months for the same reasons:)

Our child is 4, but knows even now it will always be her choice.

But wow, the QUESTIONS people think up!

[Joanne]

"Oh, I would love to have your curly hair." Said with a certain look in their eye. 

 

I'm almost 47, it took until I was about 42 to not vehemently hate it, so yes, if I could give you my curly hair I would, in a heartbeat. Poor ds inherited some of my curl, so you could pick us out as mother and son in a group after a windstorm. We went to a family wedding on dh's side a few years ago. They all have beautiful straight flat hair, it was windy. Ds and my hair looked horrid. It had been styled when we left home.  :glare:

 

 

Yet another way we are alike. I fought my curly hair during the 70's, 80's, 90's and up until about 2007! Two things happened: my second husband noticed the curl when I came out of the shower and asked me to consider growing it out, and they finally have products and process for Caucasian curly hair.

 

[SproutMamaK]

You know, it never occurred to me until I read this thread that DH and I get such different reactions when we go out with the kids, and we only have three right now (next week hopefully we'll have four, lol). Our oldest two have autism; in the oldest it is noticeable almost immediately that he's different, so I imagine that affects the comments Like many of you, I get "Wow, you must have your hands full!" "You're having ANOTHER?" "You must be so busy!" "I don't know how you do it." "You must be dying for some peace and quiet!"

Hubby on the other hand comes home with stories of people telling him how great of a Dad he is, how sweet it is to see him with the boys, getting hit on by random women (he doesn't tell me about this one because he knows I'd tease him mercilessly, lol, but I've seen it a couple times when I go over to grab something from anotehr section of the store and then meet up with them again), etc.

 

The disparity is such a sad commentary on society. :/

[eternalsummer]

"….but I think the answer you're looking for is I converted. "

 

hah, I bet that gets them :)

[Amber in SJ]

The comments I would love to hear less of I could take as a compliment so I shouldn't complain.  I look younger than my age, particularly if I am not wearing make-up, which I rarely bother with, so I get my share of comments.  

 

When I mention my oldest is turning 20 and in college I hear;

 

"Were you a teenage mom?" (I wasn't)

"Why didn't you just let your mom raise her?" (Because I was 24 and married for four years when she was born)

"You do not have a child that old."  (You're right, I am just kidding)

"Are you sure she isn't your little sister?"  (Yep, I am sure)

"That can't be true.  You look like you are 30."  (Yes, I had a baby at 10 years old.  I am precocious that way.)

"Did you adopt a teenager when you were like 25?" ( ummmm...what?)

 

When it comes up in conversation that I have been married for 24 years:

 

"Were you a child bride?"  (No.  I was 20)

"Was it an arranged marriage?"  (No.  I picked him out all by myself, and did a great job, if I do say so myself)

"Is your husband much older than you?"  (I get this one often and I can't quite figure it out.  Are they assuming I was a child bride & my dh is some kind of pedophile?)

"Do you belong to one of those cults that marries little girls to old men?"  (No.  Dh is one year older than I am.)

"Are you the younger 2nd or 3rd wife?" (if they also know I am Mormon)

"Did your parents have to sign you away when you got married?"  (No.  I was a legal adult when I got married)

"Did they let you finish high school after you got married?"  (I was in college when I got married, thank you.)

 

I thought the rule was never ask a lady her age, but I guess no one teaches that rule any more,

 

Amber in SJ

[JumpyTheFrog]

Wow, I wonder if I lead a boring life or don't get out much. I can't even imagine people actually asking many of these questions.

[kewb]

Yet another way we are alike. I fought my curly hair during the 70's, 80's, 90's and up until about 2007! Two things happened: my second husband noticed the curl when I came out of the shower and asked me to consider growing it out, and they finally have products and process for Caucasian curly hair.

 

I am guilty of the curly hair comments. I have incredible curly hair envy.  My hair is fine and straight and if i wear it any length other then really short it just looks stringy.  Oh, how I used to pretend to have long, luxurious curls when I was a girl.  In the 80's I sported total poodle head as I tried to perm my way to the hair I should have been born with.

 

I apologize for adding to your curly hair angst.  No one ever is envious of my hair.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Dh (Filipino) was asked once where "his people" came from.  He said he was tempted to say something like "Oh, I'm from the Manhattan Barrington-Smythes."    They were asking about his ethnicity but I've never heard a clumsier (and I thought offensive) way of asking.  

[Forget-Me-Not]

You know, it never occurred to me until I read this thread that DH and I get such different reactions when we go out with the kids, and we only have three right now (next week hopefully we'll have four, lol).

My husband took all four of our kids (oldest was 10, youngest was <1) out to dinner by himself one night. I can't even remember the circumstances about why, but he did. The next time we went in as a family, the waitress who served them that night *remembered* him and commented on it, lol.

[sassenach]

I get "He doesn't look sick." Umm yeah there is a reason for the term invisable illness.

 

And

 

But he seemed fine when he was here yesterday for two hours so he must be fine." Uhh yeah, sitting around talking more than doing anything physical and really two hours ia not an accurate sample.

 

And

 

"How can he play sports if he has that?" I want to say 'How can you be so stupid and still breathe?' I mean good god you would think I said he was on thr professional level. Sheesh.

I wonder if I'm the only one who flipped my laptop upside down to read your siggy....

[*Inna*]

"So, you finally got your boy, huh?!" and variations of such when our son was born. We have TWO girls. c'mon!

 

"When are you going back to work?" - from my career friends. Educating and taking care of my children is my work. :glare:

[sassenach]

The comments I would love to hear less of I could take as a compliment so I shouldn't complain.  I look younger than my age, particularly if I am not wearing make-up, which I rarely bother with, so I get my share of comments.  

 

When I mention my oldest is turning 20 and in college I hear;

 

"Were you a teenage mom?" (I wasn't)

"Why didn't you just let your mom raise her?" (Because I was 24 and married for four years when she was born)

"You do not have a child that old."  (You're right, I am just kidding)

"Are you sure she isn't your little sister?"  (Yep, I am sure)

"That can't be true.  You look like you are 30."  (Yes, I had a baby at 10 years old.  I am precocious that way.)

"Did you adopt a teenager when you were like 25?" ( ummmm...what?)

 

When it comes up in conversation that I have been married for 24 years:

 

"Were you a child bride?"  (No.  I was 20)

"Was it an arranged marriage?"  (No.  I picked him out all by myself, and did a great job, if I do say so myself)

"Is your husband much older than you?"  (I get this one often and I can't quite figure it out.  Are they assuming I was a child bride & my dh is some kind of pedophile?)

"Do you belong to one of those cults that marries little girls to old men?"  (No.  Dh is one year older than I am.)

"Are you the younger 2nd or 3rd wife?" (if they also know I am Mormon)

"Did your parents have to sign you away when you got married?"  (No.  I was a legal adult when I got married)

"Did they let you finish high school after you got married?"  (I was in college when I got married, thank you.)

 

I thought the rule was never ask a lady her age, but I guess no one teaches that rule any more,

 

Amber in SJ

Weird.  The only thing I've heard repeatedly about being a young mom is, "You look too young to have a 17yo." To which I answer, "I am."

 

I had her and married at 17.  I haven't gotten any of the crazy that you have.  Maybe you've aged better than I have!

[Denise in Florida]

"I could never do that." 

 

I hate that. Especially because this is after I tell them that we had a horrible year in public school and I left my teaching career to homeschool a child with special needs. 

 

I didn't think I could ever do this, either!!! We do what we need to! 

 

 

this! - right there! - the bolded part!!!  yes, yes, yes

 

not just for homeschooling either

 

When they say "I can't imagine xxx" I want to ask if this is a lack of concentration or just a lack of empathy. ha

[mmeblue]

Oh the reactions I get when somebody asks me "What do you do?" ... My reply "I teach physics" is almost always answered with a groan and a remark along the lines of "I was so bad at/never understood/ hated... physics in high school".

Or "you must be so smart" , which is probably meant as a compliment, but there is no gracious way to accept that  - you don't say "thanks, I know".

 

Very very occasionally somebody responds "wow. How cool!". I'd like to hug those people.

I used to teach math, and I got the same sorts of things.  Depending on how quickly I wanted to get out of the conversation, my responses ranged from "mmm" to waxing poetic about how beautiful I find mathematics. ;)

 

When we're out with DD#2, we get asked how old she is (with incredulous looks), almost invariably followed by, "Wow.  She talks REALLY well."  Yep.  And she never, ever stops.  She even talks about her plans for what she's about to talk about, lol.  Actually, DH had her somewhere the other day, and after that exchange, the person told him that she homeschools and really thinks Reading Eggs would be great for DD!

[Runningmom80]

Are they twins? Are you sure? They really look like twins.

 

 

....like, where is that conversation supposed to go? If I said yeah, what would people say? What is the point of asking this question???

 

People are intrigued by twins. As a parent of twins, I ask if I think they are, especially if the twins look younger than mine, so I can offer words of encouragement.  We always loved when twin parents came up to us and told us "It gets easier!" :laugh:

[dollhouse]

"Are you done yet?" or "So how many are you planning to have?" with regards to family size. This seems like such a deeply personal question for random people to ask. 

 

"Oh, you poor thing!" to my oldest and only daughter when people find out we're having a fourth boy. Even if the fourth was a girl, she'd be 10 years older than her. My dd is close with her brothers and definitely not deprived by being the only girl!

[dollhouse]

"Are you done yet?" or "So how many are you planning to have?" with regards to family size. This seems like such a deeply personal question for random people to ask. 

 

"Oh, you poor thing!" to my oldest and only daughter when people find out we're having a fourth boy. Even if the fourth was a girl, she'd be 10 years older than her. My dd is close with her brothers and definitely not deprived by being the only girl!

[SKL]

Another thing people assume is that because I have 2 kids, I "need" a minivan.  Now my kids are 7 and soon won't even need car seats, but I still get the "when are you going to buy a minivan."  I have no desire and have never been at any kind of disadvantage / inconvenience over not having a gas guzzler.....

[The Girls' Mom]

My dh has chronic nerve pain that can affect various parts of his body. Having people say things like "yeah, I over do it sometimes and my feet/shoulder/back, whatever hurts too". Or " it stinks getting old" ( he is only 40!). That gets old.

 

I also hate getting asked, repeatedly, "do you like being back home?" One, we moved back two years ago. Two, no I don't really enjoy being back. I liked where we lived. So stop asking!

[TeachingTwins]

My s-i-l would probably say hers is "are they identical"~~ asked about her boy/girl twins. I would have never believed her if I didn't hear two people ask her in one shopping trip...

I get this one a lot, too, for my boy/girl twins. Someone actually argued with me about it one time after I told him that boy/girl twins can't be identical.

[LibraryLover]

Small talk has never bothered me, I am thinking, because I can't come up with anything.  Someone once called one of my kids a 'chink' and I almost punched her in the face...but that is all I got.

 

ETA: Wait!! I got something. I am volunteering in the local public school system right now, and a couple of folks from dh's work have said, "How can you stand being around kids!?" 

 

I usually reply, "I like other people's children and I feel an obligation to give something to my community." It mostly shuts them up, but it's true many people really don't care what happens to kids.  They can't see that we are all in this together.

[The Girls' Mom]

Oh, I forgot one because I blocked it out I've heard it so much. "Are they triplets?" I have identical twins and a dd 3.5 years older. Yes, they look similar, but it was kind of ridiculous when they were 1 and 4...lol. At least it makes a little sense now that they are all about the same height.

[ScoutTN]

The one I no longer have patience for is "don't you need permission from the school district to homeschool?" Nope, it is still, shockingly a free country.

This or some version of it, expressing concern over lack of government supervision of our homeschool.

[ScoutTN]

"When are you going back to work?"

Educating and taking care of my children is my work. :glare:

This too!

 

And also, "Are you going to homeschool them all the way through high school?" In a tone which expects a "No!" Answer.

 

How do I know what we will do five years from now?! I am doing well right now to know what we are doing next week and have a general plan for next year! Never mind knowing where my keys are, if I remembered the grocery list and how long it will take me to finish the laundry!

[SweetandSimple]

When are you due?  (I am not pregnant; I just have a fat tummy!)

 

This happens to me fairly often, and it makes me sad every time, even when I know that I shouldn't let it bother me... the first time I was 13 and fairly thin, so it was rather shocking to me.

 

The worst was when someone at church asked me this in front of a group of people, as I was holding my 2-month-old baby. I had to reply in front of everyone-- "I already had the baby! See?"

[Jean in Newcastle]

Oh, I forgot one because I blocked it out I've heard it so much. "Are they triplets?" I have identical twins and a dd 3.5 years older. Yes, they look similar, but it was kind of ridiculous when they were 1 and 4...lol. At least it makes a little sense now that they are all about the same height.

My sisters and I had this happen.  I'm 12 years younger than one sister and 9 years younger than the other one!  We look like sisters but not that much alike!  

[eternalsummer]

When are you due?  (I am not pregnant; I just have a fat tummy!)

 

This happens to me fairly often, and it makes me sad every time, even when I know that I shouldn't let it bother me... the first time I was 13 and fairly thin, so it was rather shocking to me.

 

The worst was when someone at church asked me this in front of a group of people, as I was holding my 2-month-old baby. I had to reply in front of everyone-- "I already had the baby! See?"

 

I have one similar, though I was mostly amused instead of offended; after I had my first, my dad (followed by assent from my husband) asked when I would stop looking pregnant.  Humph!