Brilliant Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 OK, I'll keep praying. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Still sending good thoughts your way. Feel better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oneddmanybooks Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Julie, I am so sorry to hear about the flu. Will keep praying! Hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Praying for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnitWit Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Bless your heart!! I'm so sorry! Â You will remain in my prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Limbo sucks. :grouphug: So does the flu. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Yuck! Still praying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasider Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Bad news here...we have the flu to such a severe degree that the 5:30 deciding factor had to be postponed. Thank you for your prayers. I'm not looking forward to the next couple of days in limbo. Â You and your family will remain in my prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Limbo is torture. Continuing in prayer, dear Julie. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
besroma Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 I am so sorry about the flu and about being in limbo. Â I will continue to pray for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Aww! I hope you all feel better soon. Having to wait more stinks. :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Praying also. Also throwing my hat -- or needle, as the case may be -- in the ring for a quilt square. I will need remedial instructions, as I wasn't involved last time. Â me too! Â Julie, I hope you all get to feeling better and things are finalized one way or the other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Kate Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Praying for you now! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celticmom Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chelle in MO Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 How's everyone feeling this morning, Julie? I hope all of you slept well. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted January 2, 2013 Author Share Posted January 2, 2013 We are all really sick still, and tonight we appear before the spiritual council at church, during which time dh is to answer for his actions. Still in limbo for a couple more days. Â I'm having a really hard time doing the things that I know intellectually would be positive. Right now I should go do the dishes, plan a decent dinner, and tidy my room. I know I'd feel better if I did, but.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 We are all really sick still, and tonight we appear before the spiritual council at church, during which time dh is to answer for his actions. Still in limbo for a couple more days. Â I'm having a really hard time doing the things that I know intellectually would be positive. Right now I should go do the dishes, plan a decent dinner, and tidy my room. I know I'd feel better if I did, but.... Â Â :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenL Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Â I'm having a really hard time doing the things that I know intellectually would be positive. Right now I should go do the dishes, plan a decent dinner, and tidy my room. I know I'd feel better if I did, but.... Â Give yourself grace, Julie. There is so much going on, and your health is compromised on top of it. Just love yourself, rest, and know that God is carrying you through this. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Â Still praying for you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 What is a spiritual council at church? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chelle in MO Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 We are all really sick still, and tonight we appear before the spiritual council at church, during which time dh is to answer for his actions. Still in limbo for a couple more days. Â I'm having a really hard time doing the things that I know intellectually would be positive. Right now I should go do the dishes, plan a decent dinner, and tidy my room. I know I'd feel better if I did, but.... Â Â I'm sorry you have to go when you're sick, but it will probably feel great to get that behind you. Hang in there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 We are all really sick still, and tonight we appear before the spiritual council at church, during which time dh is to answer for his actions. Still in limbo for a couple more days. Â I'm having a really hard time doing the things that I know intellectually would be positive. Right now I should go do the dishes, plan a decent dinner, and tidy my room. I know I'd feel better if I did, but.... Â Okay wait, I am so confused. You BOTH have to go before the council? Why do YOU need to be there when he is the idiot that has done this and not repented? Is this a closed meeting of some sort or before the congregation? :grouphug: I am so sorry you are going through this (though truth be told I am furious for you both towards the brothers who didn't tell you sooner and towards you dh -the d in this case stand for d*ckhead not dear). Skip the dishes, order in dinner, ignore your room. Put on your favorite pick me up song. Crank it as loud as you can, make those windows rattle and sing it out at the top of your lungs. Let out it out. (and then go puke since you are so sick). My go to pick me up song through dealing with the ex, and other crisis situation is "Trading my sorrows (Yes Lord)" song by women of faith. I can not start feeling empowered after singing it a few times. Â :grouphug: hang in there. You are strong, you are smart and you will survive through anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggieamy Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Okay wait, I am so confused. You BOTH have to go before the council? Why do YOU need to be there when he is the idiot that has done this and not repented? Is this a closed meeting of some sort or before the congregation? :grouphug: I am so sorry you are going through this (though truth be told I am furious for you both towards the brothers who didn't tell you sooner and towards you dh -the d in this case stand for d*ckhead not dear). Skip the dishes, order in dinner, ignore your room. Put on your favorite pick me up song. Crank it as loud as you can, make those windows rattle and sing it out at the top of your lungs. Let out it out. (and then go puke since you are so sick). My go to pick me up song through dealing with the ex, and other crisis situation is "Yes Lord" song by women of worship. I can not start feeling empowered after singing it a few times. Â :grouphug: hang in there. You are strong, you are smart and you will survive through anything. Â Might I suggest this song: Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted January 2, 2013 Share Posted January 2, 2013 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moxie Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I'm Catholic so I'm not sure what a spiritual council does. I hope that is code for a good old fashioned @ss kickin. Â Still praying for you to have peace! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 How did the council go tonight? Â I have been thinking about you tonight, and I hate to say this but you need to contact your dr and have a full STD screening done. You have no idea what kind of a hosebag he was with and it is better to be safe than sorry kwim. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucy in Australia Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Just got caught up on everything happening :crying: Praying for you :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted January 3, 2013 Author Share Posted January 3, 2013 I'm Catholic so I'm not sure what a spiritual council does. I hope that is code for a good old fashioned @ss kickin. Â Still praying for you to have peace! Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted January 3, 2013 Author Share Posted January 3, 2013 Generally speaking, it is indeed code for a spiritual @ss kicking. It went pretty much as expected. Dh will be recalled from his position as deacon, will be barred from communion for a period of 6 months, during which time they will counsel with him on a regular basis in order to help him overcome his sin and avoid excommunication. There will be an announcement to the congregation about the content of the meeting next Sunday, so that will be difficult for us all. Â Dh seems repentant, but still will not admit to some of the things that seem obviously to have taken place. More limbo, for another week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Not to be too nosy, but isn't he leaving? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reya Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 "If I don't admit it, it didn't really happen?" That's what a 3-year-old does. Â :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Julie, Â :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Â Praying for you. Â I hope he's leaving. I really, truly hope he's leaving. I do not believe for one instant that it is healthy for you or the children to have him there. You have a lot of processing to do and it needs to be done without his interference. Â I am also concerned about this "announcement" to the congregation. Frankly, it is only the business of church leadership because your dh, the moron, was a deacon. It is NOT the business of every other congregant to know what is happening. It is your news to tell should you choose to tell it. I consider this unhealthy. He can be held accountable without you enduring the embarassment of everyone knowing your business. This REALLY worries me. Since it sounds like he may continue to attend worship there or continue in some sort of disciplinary relationship with this body of believers, would you consider finding another church so you and the children can have privacy? I've seen this kind of thing really blow up in churches before and unfortunately, not in one single instance, did I see that the grieving, innocent parties were protected. I am anxious for you that you not endure more pain than you have to or that the children have to put up with gossip about their family. Â Also, I do want to echo Swellmamma's suggestion about seeing your doctor. Please be proactive about health issues. You don't know where the other woman has been, so to speak, and it is not uncommon for offenders to have had more than one partner by the time their unfaithfulness comes to light. I know that's an awful thing to contemplate. However, my sister went through this and her divorce lawyer had some startling statistics to back up her assertions. Sis did indeed need some medical treatment, but bless God, not for the worst that one can contract. Because she listened to her attorney and went to the doctor right away, MANY complications were avoided. Please, please, please, take care of yourself in this manner. Â Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 A few thoughts Julie. I am unclear how you are making your decision on whether to make him go or not. Is that based upon the discipline of the church? On whether you believe he is telling the truth to all who need to know (mainly you of course)? On how you gauge his level of remorse/repentance? Â You aren't required to tell us anything.....but these are issues that get really confusing. It is difficult to think clearly when all you really want is your life back to normal. That is never going to happen. Te marriage you had is forever gone. If you decide to remain with him new ground will have to be forged. A new marriage. That, if that is what YOU want, is down the road a bit. For now you need processing time WITHOUT him there in your space. Â I will tell you that what happened to me is that I was told my now xh had cheated on me. The person who told me had no reason to lie, but both my then husband and the girl he was suppose to have cheated with both denied it vehemently. I felt that because I had no proof I had to believe him. For SEVEN years I wondered what the truth was. Then as if from God himself the Truth, Proof, was dropped into my lap. I divorced him. My greatest regret is that I didn't divorce him 7 years earlier. Â If your decision to stay married or not lies in the details that you do not feel like he is providing, then you need the Truth. If I were you I would arrange for him to take a polygraph. You might be surprised at how his memory improves in the days before the test. Even then do not let him out of it. Â (Julie))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8circles Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Generally speaking, it is indeed code for a spiritual @ss kicking. It went pretty much as expected. Dh will be recalled from his position as deacon, will be barred from communion for a period of 6 months, during which time they will counsel with him on a regular basis in order to help him overcome his sin and avoid excommunication. There will be an announcement to the congregation about the content of the meeting next Sunday, so that will be difficult for us all. Â Dh seems repentant, but still will not admit to some of the things that seem obviously to have taken place. More limbo, for another week. Â Â Julie :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Â I'm concerned about this congregational announcement. You don't need everyone at church knowing your intimate business while you're dealing with this. Can this be avoided? It just isn't healthy. Â Still praying for you. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Â Â Â I am also concerned about this "announcement" to the congregation. Frankly, it is only the business of church leadership because your dh, the moron, was a deacon. It is NOT the business of every other congregant to know what is happening. It is your news to tell should you choose to tell it. I consider this unhealthy. He can be held accountable without you enduring the embarassment of everyone knowing your business. This REALLY worries me. Since it sounds like he may continue to attend worship there or continue in some sort of disciplinary relationship with this body of believers, would you consider finding another church so you and the children can have privacy? I've seen this kind of thing really blow up in churches before and unfortunately, not in one single instance, did I see that the grieving, innocent parties were protected. I am anxious for you that you not endure more pain than you have to or that the children have to put up with gossip about their family. Â Â I don't understand this at all. This is going to add another layer of complication and embarrassment to an already sensitive situation. I've never seen this type of thing go well. The tongue waggers just get one more thing to blab about, hurting the innocent. Â I really really hope this is not full disclosure. Simply a "Mr. and Mrs. Julie in CA need special prayers for a sensitive situation." is more than adequate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Â I am also concerned about this "announcement" to the congregation. Frankly, it is only the business of church leadership because your dh, the moron, was a deacon. It is NOT the business of every other congregant to know what is happening. It is your news to tell should you choose to tell it. I consider this unhealthy. He can be held accountable without you enduring the embarassment of everyone knowing your business. This REALLY worries me. Since it sounds like he may continue to attend worship there or continue in some sort of disciplinary relationship with this body of believers, would you consider finding another church so you and the children can have privacy? I've seen this kind of thing really blow up in churches before and unfortunately, not in one single instance, did I see that the grieving, innocent parties were protected. I am anxious for you that you not endure more pain than you have to or that the children have to put up with gossip about their family. Â Â Â This is extremely disconcerting to me. It is one thing for church leadership to deal with him, work with him, guide him, help him. It is another to give the whole church a reason to invade your privacy. It encourages turning prayer concerns into gossip, among other things. I couldn't imagine ever being comfortable there again, if they are all told. This is NOT Christ like at all!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DianeW88 Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 It sounds to me like he's not at all sorry about having a physical relationship(s) with a woman who isn't his wife, but he's awfully, awfully sorry he got caught doing it. They're not the same thing...at all. And quite frankly, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck....it's a duck. I really hope you can find the courage to leave this guy, otherwise I'm afraid he will destroy your soul...not to mention what it'll do to your kids. And public humiliation for an act that isn't your fault is NEVER a good thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I assume Julie was already familiar with the workings of her church discipline. I don't know how much detail is announced, but I promise you many people know already or suspect. JULIE doesn't need to feel embarrassed by what her husband has done. Affairs thrive on secrecy....every gory detail doesn't have to be publically announced but there is no reason for it to be hush hush as if Julie has some thing to be ashamed of. Â Hold your head up high Julie. It is what is is and YOU didn't cause it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Sending much love and continuing the prayers for you and your children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blueridge Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Bless your heart. I think I am understanding more clearly that you are involved with a church that is exerting it's authority where it has none. I've been there, done that, years ago. I was so mentally exhausted just trying to live up to those lofty standards, it almost killed me. Gently here...this type of church 'authority' and practice is not biblical, and is IMO a very destructive influence over individuals, couples, and families. They try to exert their power over people, through open embarrassment and judgement-passing, in order for everyone to be obedient and 'spiritual'. I know you have so much on your plate to balance right now, but you sure don't need your private issues aired in public. That can only worsen things...make you feel somehow responsible and shamed, allow him the illusion of remorse whether sincere or not, and heap unkind attitudes upon the congregation toward you and your family. I might recommend sometime in the future you reading a book like Toxic Faith (there are so many articles online, too) which explains and tries to begin unwinding the stranglehold of abusive spiritual manipulation. I mean no disrespect towards your church or church friends, but this is unhealthy for you to be floating along while your dh is still unrepentant. The Lord does not expect this kind of compliance from you or anyone. I am so very sorry. You are a beautiful person, and I am so sorry you are being taken advantage of because of your kindheartedness. Â ETA: I somehow had missed that he was a church deacon. Yes, I understand there is church discipline, but being a leader does stiffen the penalty. Hugs, Julie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oak Knoll Mom Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I am also concerned about this "announcement" to the congregation. Frankly, it is only the business of church leadership because your dh, the moron, was a deacon. It is NOT the business of every other congregant to know what is happening. It is your news to tell should you choose to tell it. I consider this unhealthy. He can be held accountable without you enduring the embarassment of everyone knowing your business. This REALLY worries me. Since it sounds like he may continue to attend worship there or continue in some sort of disciplinary relationship with this body of believers, would you consider finding another church so you and the children can have privacy? I've seen this kind of thing really blow up in churches before and unfortunately, not in one single instance, did I see that the grieving, innocent parties were protected. I am anxious for you that you not endure more pain than you have to or that the children have to put up with gossip about their family. Â Â I'm hoping this announcement is along the same lines as what would happen at my church. "Mr. Julie in CA has broken his vow of ordination as a deacon in our church. Please pray for the pastors, elders, and counselors who are leading him through this difficult time. The congregation is advised to not seek spiritual guidance from him at this time." Â Nothing would be said about what he had done, who he had sinned against, etc. I do believe he needs to be held accountable publicly because he has taken a public oath to serve in leadership in this church. Julie, however, needs to be left out of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Julie, please make your own decisions about your marriage and relationship with your dh. The church should be making their decisions on your dh's leadership position (as they have) and his participation in the church (as they have done also) only. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 If it's like our church a brief announcement will be made that the deacon is being removed from office and will not be permitted to take communion until he has repented and made restitution. No other details will be given. Â And though I think our church is great, I saw our pastors encourage a wife to stay with her no good husband and try to work things out. She did, it was awful, new things surfaced and she ended up divorcing him anyway. He was a major perv and our pastors did not see it. They never would have counseled thus if they had known. Julie needs to make her own decisions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpecialClassical Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 Obviously I do not know Julie's church or her leaders, but church dicipline is biblical. Our church practices it and it is done with grace and very careful consideration by our elders. And it is rare, never to be used as a power play. Â Matthew 18 describes how discipline progresses. If a person refuses to repent on private levels, witnesses are to tell it to the church. This isn't meant for shaming, it is meant to hold members accountable to a standard they have agreed to and the purpose is to bring about true sorrow when faced with losing your church family. In a healthy church Julie would be supported and I assume the elders would speak to her about what will be said. People are going to know something is wrong and if the elders can make it clear that Julie has been a model wife and set her up as not only innocent, but the example of mercy that she has been other members will have no room to gossip. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted January 3, 2013 Author Share Posted January 3, 2013 I can see that I need to clarify some things, and I'm sorry to have omitted details that might (or might not) make it easier to understand the situation. Â The church is not requiring me to stay with dh, and they are fully supportive should the final decision be made (by either of us) to separate. Â The announcement in church is not happening as a punishment, but is a result of the promise dh made when he accepted the office of deacon, to be above reproach in his personal life. Not to be perfect, by any means, but to be transparent about his life. Because he made this promise, and because it was a promise made to the congregation, it needs to be made public that he's been censured and is no longer in the office of deacon. They do not, I think, intend to include the details of what he has done. It's also done in order to allow the congregation to be supportive of our family during this time. We go to a tiny church, and honestly, I do believe and trust that the people there will take seriously their promise to come alongside us to pray and to help in some very tangible ways. It's likely, for instance, that someone will come forward and offer dh a place to stay, and some intensive prayer & counsel at the same time, during a time when we can not really afford to support two households. As a matter of practicality, I think that's a good thing. It will also allow some of the people who love my dc the most to be aware of the seriousness of our family situation, and to come alongside them and give them some extra kindness, extra hugs, and extra shoulders to cry on, should they want to do so. Â As for whether the final decision has been made, well, what is it that they say? It's complicated. Â Dh has asked me to be present during a polygraph exam. I guess I didn't realize that was even possible, but it is, and apparently with generally good accuracy. Do I think dh will pass? No. Not really at all. Still, on the slim chance, like, one in a million, that he's telling even part of the truth, I'd like to give him a chance to show it. It would definitely be simpler to just say that he's lost my trust and that without trust there can be no marriage, but considering the ramifications to my dc, to our extended family, and yes, to myself, I want to know the truth if possible. Â The other factor here that I didn't include in my other posts is...well...while I do believe dh's brother about what he saw, this is the brother that would have a definite financial advantage should dh and I separate. I do believe dh's brother but...I feel like I need to try, to the best of my ability, to make sure that what he's said is true, before I act on that basis alone. Â The way I've left it in my mind is this: I'm expecting dh to be gone very soon. I don't, however, need to make that happen right this minute. I can, after all, kick his @ss to the curb today, tomorrow, or next week, whenever the firm desire hits me. For now though, just for this moment, I'm allowing myself the leeway of putting off that decision for up to about a week. It's one day at a time, one moment at a time, and I don't lose much by cutting myself some slack and watching what happens in the next couple of days. Â I'm so thankful for all of the support here, and I'm not sure how I'd have gotten past the last couple of days without it. I can feel myself becoming less frantic each day, and more able to make practical and good decisions for my family. Â Oh, and the checkup & testing is definitely going to happen, but I'm waiting for the flu and other, more feminine discomforts, to taper off first, so it'll be a couple more days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasider Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 ((((Julie)))) Â Many thoughts. Several concerns. Sorry that your time in limbo has been extended. This is good for neither you nor your children. Â Please never forget that as a child of Christ, you are UNDER MUCH GRACE. Â Can't say more here without saying too much. Please know that you will remain in my prayers. Â Â ETA - Thanks for the above details which give more understanding, I typed the above response prior to your last post. Sounds like your church practices discipline in a healthy way - sadly, that's not always the case. Â BTW, has the other woman been involved in any of this process? IIRC, she was possibly at some point involved in your church? Find myself wondering how your dh would do on a polygraph if both you and she were present when it is administered... Â Julie, once again you have revealed yourself as a rare model of grace by continuing to extend your husband the benefit of the doubt. Once the matter is settled - whichever way it is settled - you should be at peace with how you have handled things on your end. You are a gem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted January 3, 2013 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I think you've got a good idea/plan/grip/whatever on what you will/need to do! Keep your chin up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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