Do you have a no-nudity-with-friends-policy?

[Aubrey]

I just found out a friend is getting certified to become a mw. I don't think I'd change the one who's delivered all of my babies anyway, but I got to thinking about the idea of knowing someone outside of a mw office/dr's office & then knowing them *inside* it.

 

It's heart-warming & run-screaming at the same time. I think I'm voting in favor of the no-nudity-w/-friends policy. Sorry, MW Friend.

[BakersDozen]

My OB is a dear friend and my labor team (2 women and one of the women's dhs) are dear friends. They've all seen me sans clothes (and not in my best state of mind as well). I worried at first when I asked my friends to attend my labor and went with the doctor whom I knew from church how I and they would feel about seeing...everything. It turned out that it was no big deal at all (although I admit I had an adjustment period with my OB but realized that she was comfortable both at the office and at church which helped me relax).

[Caitilin]

I know what you mean, but I had a friendly acquaintance as my doula for 2 of my births, and it really was fine. It was just the LAST thing on my mind at the time, you know? And then later, I just felt like, eh, she's seen it all before.:tongue_smilie:

 

If you like and trust this person, I'd say go for it--don't necessarily discount her because you know her.

 

And, by the way, since I haven't said it yet, CONGRATULATIONS!!

[PiCO]

I have a no-nudity-with-strangers policy. ;)

[dirty ethel rackham]

I got over it real quick. I have done labor support for friends and have seen them in their all-together, but that was only in the context of labor - not a social visit. I was supposed to have a couple friends help me in my last labor, but she came too fast for us to even remember to call them. Context is everything.

[8circles]

My OB for the beginning of my 3rd pregnancy was my BF's DH. It was no problem. We ended-up moving away before delivery but it was never an issue.

[bbsweetpea]

I have a good friend that is a midwife (known each other since childhood), a good friend that is a doula and a good friend that is an OB. All of these woman I love an adore but I decided to have someone else has my OB. I just don't feel comfortable getting nude in front of someone that I hang out with all the time. Heck I don't really love getting nude in front of my DH. LOL

[Carol in Cal.]

OK, the thread title reminds me of a funny story. When I was about 32 I went to a weaving workshop at a convent retreat house. The rooms were comfortable but over heated. And they assigned roommates; mine was a prim-seeming 80 year old.

 

So I was SO hot, and I said to her, very respectfully, 'Um, how do you feel about going barefoot in the room? Would that be OK with you? It's so warm in here.' To which she replied immediately, 'Shoot, how do YOU feel about going nude in the room?'

 

Kind of the last thing I would have expected, based on her appearance.

[Truscifi]

Our family doctor is a friend of ours. She has done exams on all of us and it is not a big deal, at least for me...dh is already sleeping so I can't ask him, but he didn't say anything about feeling uncomfortable. She is very professional at the office and keeps work time and hanging out time totally separate.

[redsquirrel]

That would depend on what kind of friend they are.

 

And if said friend were a medical professional, I wouldn't think twice.

[DawnM]

Nah.

 

I grew up at Boarding school......I just roomed for 4 days at the beach with my high school roommate and BFF and there was no concern now, almost like we were back in high school! :D

[dangermom]

I try not to think about the fact that our family friend and former Bishop (pastor) is also an anaesthesiologist, and assisted at my gall bladder surgery. He's seen me naked and unconscious.:001_huh: I'm sure he's professionally forgotten it by now...

[Veritaserum]

I've attended my friends' births and they've attended mine. Nudity at a birth is in context and it isn't weird later. Just sayin'. ;)

[Spy Car]

If you can't be nude with your friends who can you be nude with? :D

 

Bill (off to check "friends" list :tongue_smilie:)

[BakersDozen]

 

If you can't be nude with your friends who can you be nude with?

:lol: I can't wait to share this with my friend's dh who will attend this birth again.

[jentancalann]

I guess I don't have one. I had a friend at a birth and it wasn't wierd. It was supposed to be a homebirth so she saw me nekkid at home and the in the hospital. I think as far as births go, if they are ok with it then its no big deal for me. Really, they are the ones in their right minds at that moment, not me. In that situation I'm not caring about anything besides getting that baby out!

[buddhabelly]

Best. Thread. Title. Ever.

[Truscifi]

Best. Thread. Title. Ever.

 

It definitely made me stop and read! :lol:

[littleWMN]

I go to church (now) with the guy that didn't deliver my baby (haha, a nurse did - baby came FAST!). Yeh... it's a little weird, but not bad. I won't go back to him though now. And never went back for my 6 week. I'm going to get my yearly with another OBGYN in the same clinic.

[QueenCat]

I was really afraid to open this thread.... really wasn't sure what to expect:D.

[Swirl]

This really wouldn't bother me.

 

BUT, I do have a no-nudity with a friend's husband policy. :lol:

 

My regular OB was going away on vacation and he asked if it was ok to have my friend's husband deliver my baby instead. I said no.

[texasmama]

It would probably bother me later that a friend had seen me nude...though not in the moment when I was yelling my head off and pushing out that baby.;)

 

(Actually, it would bother me that a friend saw my jiggly bits more than my nude ones. lol)

[texasmama]

If you can't be nude with your friends who can you be nude with? :D

 

Bill (off to check "friends" list :tongue_smilie:)

 

Oh dear...:lol:

[Aubrey]

My OB for the beginning of my 3rd pregnancy was my BF's DH. It was no problem. We ended-up moving away before delivery but it was never an issue.

 

Oh. my. I haven't even gone into the realm of male dr's.

 

I know you're not supposed to care about that stuff when you're in labor, but based on my experience, I do.

 

W/ #4, I remember glancing up & thinking how weird it was to have three adults just...standing there...watching me...*naked*...having a baby. And I went back to having a baby, hoping they didn't notice that I noticed. Because, despite the candles & the birth ambiance, it was weird.

 

W/ #2, the apprentice walked in. My dad was on the way, & it was his first time in the place--an old converted house--& I was sure that it was him, wandering in & lost. I've never screamed at another human being like I screamed at that poor 20yo girl to GET. OUT. And in case you didn't hear me the first time...oh wait. It's you? Sorry! Really Sorry! No, it's ok--come on in. I mean, yeah, I'm naked and all, but you're NOT my dad, so--hey! The more the merrier.

 

I don't think she recovered. :( :lol:

[Aubrey]

OK, the thread title reminds me of a funny story. When I was about 32 I went to a weaving workshop at a convent retreat house. The rooms were comfortable but over heated. And they assigned roommates; mine was a prim-seeming 80 year old.

 

So I was SO hot, and I said to her, very respectfully, 'Um, how do you feel about going barefoot in the room? Would that be OK with you? It's so warm in here.' To which she replied immediately, 'Shoot, how do YOU feel about going nude in the room?'

 

Kind of the last thing I would have expected, based on her appearance.

 

Oh my gosh. :lol: :lol:

[Aubrey]

If you can't be nude with your friends who can you be nude with? :D

 

Bill (off to check "friends" list :tongue_smilie:)

 

Oh goodness--I'm almost crying I'm laughing so hard. I don't know why I thought "friend" *assumed* FEMALE.

[MrsBasil]

I do. I absolutely do. I worked at Dr's office for years and will go there for all kinds of things not related to me being naked.

 

I am a bit of a prude though.

 

I had to see a male OB once during my last pregnancy and was uncomfortable. I had to see him again for my emergency c-setion(and the anesthesiologist was male) and even in my drugged up state I wished it was a female.

 

The idea of someone I know is just too much for me. Even my nursing in public or in front of certain people I know is supremely uncomfortable. I don't care when someone else, but ugh.

[enlarsh]

I've attended my friends' births and they've attended mine. Nudity at a birth is in context and it isn't weird later. Just sayin'. ;)

 

The context of said nudity is a valid point.:lol:

[Aubrey]

You guys always do such a good job of putting my inhibition into perspective. Apparently, I'm so far right of nuns that I've fallen off the globe. :lol:

[Jean in Newcastle]

Oh goodness--I'm almost crying I'm laughing so hard. I don't know why I thought "friend" *assumed* FEMALE.

 

I wonder what it says about me that the title immediately made me think of "friends with benefits". What you thought is much more wholesome!;)

[jewellsmommy]

This really wouldn't bother me.

 

BUT, I do have a no-nudity with a friend's husband policy. :lol:

 

My regular OB was going away on vacation and he asked if it was ok to have my friend's husband deliver my baby instead. I said no.

 

 

I really have to agree with the bolded. I don't care if they are a doctor or whatever. That would be waaay to weird for me.

[Carol in Cal.]

If you can't be nude with your friends who can you be nude with? :D

 

Bill (off to check "friends" list :tongue_smilie:)

 

Where's that brain bleach when you need it???

 

(Wanders off, shaking head, hoping for an infusion of mental floss...)

[KrissiK]

My sil is an excellent OB/gyn. I know lots of people who go to her and they love her. I would love to go to her. But.... I don't. I guess I have the same policy.

[Plucky]

Oh. my. I haven't even gone into the realm of male dr's.

 

I know you're not supposed to care about that stuff when you're in labor, but based on my experience, I do.

 

W/ #4, I remember glancing up & thinking how weird it was to have three adults just...standing there...watching me...*naked*...having a baby. And I went back to having a baby, hoping they didn't notice that I noticed. Because, despite the candles & the birth ambiance, it was weird.

 

/QUOTE]

 

Well, why were 3 people just looking at you? They should have been rubbing your back and murmuring encouragement. When I birth, watch out, it's all coming off. I think I freaked out my sil. She's more like you and she wanted to see me when I was in the tub. I think she thought I'd be dressed or something. :lol:

[Carol in Cal.]

 

Well, why were 3 people just looking at you? They should have been rubbing your back and murmuring encouragement. When I birth, watch out, it's all coming off.

 

Darn right. When I'm in labor, there is one big job going on, and I'm doing it, and everyone else needs to support it or leave. Period. And I'm not really THINKING about them, IYKWIM.

[Aggie]

I have a no-nudity-with-strangers policy. ;)

 

 

:lol::lol:

 

 

I've attended my friends' births and they've attended mine. Nudity at a birth is in context and it isn't weird later. Just sayin'. ;)

 

I attended a friend's birth and it was *wonderful* to be able to witness a birth. And there's absolutely no weirdness ever.

[Hannah C.]

Honestly, by the point in labor at which I was nude, I so didn't care. And it wasn't weird interacting with those people afterward, either.

 

That being said, the only male around was my husband. I think I might've cared if there were men around.

[Impish]

Honestly, btwn late OB appts, then the labour and delivery process, I feel so much like a molested Muppet at that point that nudity wouldn't occur to me to care about.

[Peela]

It would never be a problem for me- I would be far more concerned about whether I felt they had the right energy for the kind of birth I wanted.

[Laura Corin]

I would certainly strip naked if I were changing to go swimming with a friend. Having a friend as a midwife is a different thing: it is a change in the nature of the relationship that goes beyond taking clothes off.

 

Laura

[MelanieM]

It would never be a problem for me- I would be far more concerned about whether I felt they had the right energy for the kind of birth I wanted.

 

This!

 

And Spy Car... :lol: :lol: :lol:

[NanceXToo]

In that situation, it wouldn't bother me. Although I GUESS it might depend on the friend.

[Carrie12345]

I've never had the... um... opportunity(?) to consider it in a planned context, so I can't say for certain.

 

I have been friends with many EMTs, including a large percentage of my graduating class. Let's just say I tried to avoid my home town during my last trimester. I did NOT want to risk having any of them transport me!

[TheReader]

It horrified me to find out that a nurse who attended my last birth also went to my church at that time.

 

I didn't really know her well, we were new to the area and to the church, but seeing her there after was very awkward for me. I never could get anyone to pin down exactly what role she played but I'm pretty sure she was more attending my son than attending me, so I don't *think* she saw the delivery, etc. Still, as I never knew for sure, it was just weird for me.

 

So, yea, I'm all for a no nudity with friends policy. Makes sense to me!

[Aubrey]

Well, why were 3 people just looking at you? They should have been rubbing your back and murmuring encouragement. When I birth, watch out, it's all coming off. I think I freaked out my sil. She's more like you and she wanted to see me when I was in the tub. I think she thought I'd be dressed or something. :lol:

 

I don't want anyone touching me. And the murmurs of encouragement...well, dh says I'm hard to encourage. I wouldn't say this to my mw directly, but when she leaves the room, I growl to my dh, "I'm not doing a 'good job'--I'm having a baby. I'd absolutely stop the process & go have a cup of coffee, given the choice." :lol:

 

I'm always tempted to birth alone. Theoretically, I'd prefer not even dh to be there. I mean, I'm always glad he & mw were there afterward, you know. Just not before hand.

[CalicoKat]

I watch Gray's Anatomy, and I have two sister's who are nurses (one is labor a delivery). It's all professional until you get a room of professionals gossiping. They remember it all. :001_huh:

 

I would NEVER be comfortable having a baby withy anyone I know, sisters or friends, present. And I've never had to give birth to have a baby. Oh you should hear the stories.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

Well, my best friend asked me to be in the labor and delivery room with her and her husband when my god daughter was born. And then, she asked me to come with her to the plastic surgeon for several visits during her reconstruction surgery after her mastectomy from breast cancer.

 

She also helped me after my breast reduction surgery.

 

We have shared hotel rooms on many scrapbooking weekends, so we've seen each other in all states of undress and humiliation. I've never had a problem with it. I haven't had much occasion to be in a situation like these with other close friends, but I don't think I'd mind if it came up.

[8circles]

Oh. my. I haven't even gone into the realm of male dr's.

 

Ah, then I'm probably not the best person to ask about this stuff. On the modestometer I naturally fall more to the "not" side.

 

I know you're not supposed to care about that stuff when you're in labor, but based on my experience, I do.

 

W/ #4, I remember glancing up & thinking how weird it was to have three adults just...standing there...watching me...*naked*...having a baby. And I went back to having a baby, hoping they didn't notice that I noticed. Because, despite the candles & the birth ambiance, it was weird.

 

1) I remember once when we were waiting for the pushing to begin (this is a hospital birth & I get pain meds, so different scenario) & I was sitting-up with my legs somewhat propped & my OB (not my BFF's DH) came over & turned-on that big light. I was mortified when I looked-up & saw that the TV had turned into a mirror & I could see myself. As soon as DH fixed it I was OK.

2) I honestly think that for me, the candles & birth ambience would make it worse. Give me sterile hospital feeling while I labor any day. In that context there are far fewer things that will bother me.

 

W/ #2, the apprentice walked in. My dad was on the way, & it was his first time in the place--an old converted house--& I was sure that it was him, wandering in & lost. I've never screamed at another human being like I screamed at that poor 20yo girl to GET. OUT. And in case you didn't hear me the first time...oh wait. It's you? Sorry! Really Sorry! No, it's ok--come on in. I mean, yeah, I'm naked and all, but you're NOT my dad, so--hey! The more the merrier.

My dad is an MD (not OB) but I think that would freak me out as well.

I don't think she recovered. :( :lol:

 

My first visit to my BFF's DH my DH & both older boys came with (DH wanted to see the U/S & we didn't have a sitter). Well, I also needed a pap. I didn't really think about the kids at the time, they were behaving so they were watching the whole thing. After it was done & I was sitting-up again & we were finishing the exam, the OB gave one of those swab-stick-thingies to DS who was about a year old (he was trying to climb-up to get one). To my horror, he started trying to stick it between my legs. It was hysterical. :lol:

[fairfarmhand]

I am right there with you Aubrey....no male OB's. Nope. Can't do it.

 

Definitely have a no nudity policy w/ everyone but my OB and dh I guess :)

 

Not even my parents were there when I gave birth. Just me, dh, the dr and oh 14 or so assistants, nurses, etc. (I think the hospital janitor might have been there but I wasn't counting)

 

We have 2 friends who are nurse anesthetists (guys!:eek:) Here's hoping I never have to have anything done at their hospitals!!!

[Pretty in Pink]

I have no problem changing in front of my girlfriends, and a girlfriend actually attended the birth of my third child because my dh was out of state. That said, I'd be uncomfortable having a friend for an OB or midwife or gyno.