How much food should a family bring to a potluck?

[Lilymax]

I'm co-hosting a reunion in a few weeks. It's for a group of about 40 people that used to attend church together (the church ended up closing).

 

(Edited to add that's 40 families/couples, not 40 individuals.)

 

Anyway...I posted a thread on our FB group asking people to share what they're bringing to eat, so that we don't end up with lots of similar foods. So far, only two of us are bringing any kind of entree. Others have said they'll bring a salad and bread, some are bringing a dessert.

 

I was always told the rule for potluck was to bring as much food as your family will eat, plus enough to share with another person or two. But now I'm wondering if other people haven't heard of that before?

 

I have a family of five, but I'm making enough of my entrees (a big crock pot of meatballs, and a 9x13 dish of baked macaroni and cheese) to serve at least ten people, in addition to a salad, a sheet cake that serves 20 and a few gallons of iced tea. But I was brought up to always cook for an army. :001_smile:

 

Is it tacky to ask those who've said they're just bringing a pie or a salad to bring something more substantial? I know the idea is that everyone shares a bit of this and that, but if no one else brings main dishes, it's going to be slim pickings...or is that just the risk one takes when hosting a "pot LUCK"?

 

Thank you in advance for any input!

Edited April 17, 2011 by Lilymax
Forgot something

[staceyobu]

Could you send out an email for clarification and ask everyone to bring a main dish and a side? The side could be veggie/salad/desert/bread/etc.

[Peela]

I dont think its tacky to be specific if you want to be, but I have never really found a need, myself. I don't think I have ever been to a pot luck, ever, where there wasn't leftovers, but maybe its different there- some poeple bring more, some people bring less food. And the most I have ever been specific is to ask for vegetarian food only, but in our demographic that is quite acceptable.

 

DH runs a potluck with his work once a week and after many years of not being specific, he did recently ask people if they could being more salads and healthy foods because it wasnt helping his overweight belly any to be eating so much delicious but hugh calorie food. Everyone was quite agreeable to the idea and its quite a healthy meal nowadays.

[NanceXToo]

I don't think I'd ask specific people to bring something more than they already said they'd bring, but I WOULD send out a general notice, to the general population of attendees, informing them that we could really use some more entrees, that so far we only have two entrees for 40 people or whatever, and leave it to them to volunteer.

 

When my homeschool group is having a potluck, I usually bring two trays of baked ziti.

[momofkhm]

I don't think I'd ask specific people to bring something more than they already said they'd bring, but I WOULD send out a general notice, to the general population of attendees, informing them that we could really use some more entrees, that so far we only have two entrees for 40 people or whatever, and leave it to them to volunteer.

 

:iagree:

 

In answer to your question, I've always heard to bring enough to feed your family plus one. But that was years ago! For next time: I like the idea of main dish plus salad or dessert. Another idea is to assign certain letters certain things: A-f bring salads, G-L bring mains, M-T bring dessert, U-Z bring breads. (I didn't pay any attention to how many possible families would bring each, just to show what I mean!)

[KellyKelley]

nak so excuse the typos please

could you compile a list of what is being brought and send it out like a menu. Some people would notice the shortages and bring something extra. Then next time make a sign up list with categories like Entree, Sides, Desserts, Drinks, etc. and how many of each are needed. Don't forget to add the cups, plates, and cutlery.

[Pretty in Pink]

I'd just send out a group email clarifying that everyone should be an entree and a side, plus a drink or dessert.

[MamaT]

I've always heard that you were supposed to bring enough food to feed your family plus extra. I would just send an email to the general group telling them that more entrees are needed. I'm sure people will be willing to bring more once they know it is needed.

[JudoMom]

I would just send out a general message that it looks like more entrees are needed. I hate it when I'm assigned a type of food to bring, but if I knew there was a need I would bring something extra.

[Mom22ns]

I would just post updates as to what is being brought. I usually only bring one dish to a potluck, but I make sure there is enough of that to feed a small army (4 dozen homemade rolls, a 9x13 of a rich dessert, 4-6 dozen cookies, 20 lbs of brisket). If I had already signed up and someone asked me to bring additional dishes, I would consider it very tacky. However, if they posted what had been signed up for and I saw an area was low, I would bring something extra to help. I don't like being told what to do or how yo do it, it is probably part of the reason that I homeschool :).

[Parrothead]

Generally there is way too much food at potlucks. The old rule used to be one's family plus one. Seems lately one thinks one's family will not partake of the offerings so one has started bringing full meals for one's family plus 10.

 

I wouldn't worry unnecessarily about who is bringing what. Even if you end up with 40 sides, that will be enough to feed everyone.

[Rivka]

Our church has a Christmas Eve potluck every year between the early children's service and the 8pm "people who can sit still" service. One year my husband literally got nothing to eat. By the time he got to the front of the serving line, they were out of dinner food and setting out desserts.

 

Ever since, we bring an enormous ham.

 

I don't think you want everyone bringing a main, because then you'd have too much. Why not organize the list of what people have offered to bring by category, and circulate it by e-mail with a little note that says "hmm, is this a little one-sided?" Then let people draw their own conclusions.

[ChristusG]

While everyone has probably at least heard of the potluck "rule", I still think people try to get away with doing as little work (cooking) as possible.

 

I think I'd send out a mass email explaining the general potluck "rule" of "bring enough to feed your own family, plus extra" and hope that people get the idea. If not, there's going to be slim pickings when eating.

[regentrude]

If everybody brings enough for their own family AND extra people, there will be too much food.

I find one of the fun things about potlucks that you never know what to expect - so what if there are a dozen salads and ten deserts and only one entree. Then we'll have salad and desert ;-)

 

Unless there is an event coordinator, I would leave it up to people to choose what they want to bring. I have not been to a potluck where there was not more than enough food, of some sort or another.

[My3Monkeys]

I don't think it would be wrong to ask people to switch to entrees or to see if people who haven't responded yet will bring an entree. But, asking people to bring more food may leave you with a ton of leftovers. I usually bring one or two things to a potluck. I wouldn't think to bring an entree, sides, and dessert to a potluck though. The point is (at least around here) to bring a "party sized" serving of what you are bringing so there is enough to go around of your dish (as well as everyone else's). Even if I bring only a salad, I bring enough salad to fill a large container, not just a bowl that my own family would eat.

[ocelotmom]

I'm in the group who has never been to a potluck where there was too little food, even those run by broke and not particularly socially adept college students. More often they end up with a bunch of leftovers being shoved off on whoever is there till the end.

 

IMO, the entree vs. side dish distinction tends to be blurred at potlucks. People take small servings of more things so that they can try everything that looks good. Also, one family's side dish (mac&cheese, for example) may be a main dish for someone else.

 

For a better balance, I'd encourage people to bring something (entree, side, salad) + an optional dessert. Or one healthy dish + one fun dish. That should help ensure that there's enough substantial food for everyone to eat, and that the majority don't bring desserts just because they're fun and easy.

Edited April 17, 2011 by ocelotmom

[Unicorn.]

I would just send out a general message that it looks like more entrees are needed. I hate it when I'm assigned a type of food to bring, but if I knew there was a need I would bring something extra.

 

:iagree: Our swim team has started assigning things for our yearly banquet, based on last name. I hate it! I also ignore it. I have always brought banana pudding, and will continue to do so. It's a tradition w/ us, and it is requested by several, sooo, I ignore it. I like the idea of a main dish and side, or main dish and a dessert.

[Crissy]

I would just send out a general message that it looks like more entrees are needed. I hate it when I'm assigned a type of food to bring, but if I knew there was a need I would bring something extra.

 

:iagree:

[Crimson Wife]

I don't think I have ever been to a pot luck, ever, where there wasn't leftovers

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

[ocelotmom]

:iagree: Our swim team has started assigning things for our yearly banquet, based on last name. I hate it! I also ignore it. I have always brought banana pudding, and will continue to do so. It's a tradition w/ us, and it is requested by several, sooo, I ignore it. I like the idea of a main dish and side, or main dish and a dessert.

 

I think this is part of the bigger problem - desserts tend to be the most socially rewarding thing to bring! They're the most likely to be gobbled up, and the most likely to elicit compliments.

 

(Another possibility: Request no store-bought desserts. If people want to bring their homemade specialty dessert, great. But if they're just going to buy something, why not have it be something a little more nutritionally redeeming than a bag of mediocre chocolate chip cookies?)

Edited April 17, 2011 by ocelotmom

[Chris in VA]

I'm a priest's wife, so I've been to my share of potlucks (just finished the 5 Weds potlucks in Lent), and I have to say I've never heard of a potluck rule! How interesting!

I just bring a salad, or a crockpot of meatballs and noodles, or sometimes if I don't have time, a loaf of nice country bread. Or brownies--I do make a lot of brownies.

There's always enough. Loaves and fishes, y'know? :D

I can't imagine making as much as the OP.

[AuntPol]

I don't think I have ever been to a pot luck, ever, where there wasn't leftovers,

 

I have -plenty of times.

 

My childhood church had potlucks and it would be way too much food. My homeschool group does them and generally, we have just enough food but rarely "too much". However, when our Scouts have potlucks, we run out of food. Most families come with one small item that feeds 4 (even if they have a family of 8) or don't bring anything. Then they let kids go first and it never fails there will be one kid with four of the eight biscuits that were brought. I think I'm only parent that oversees that their children don't take too much! Some of the parents are just as bad, cutting in front of the kids and taking way more than a fair share. Many times, my husband and I have done without at Scout potlucks.

[PBnJ]

My church hosts a potluck every Sunday after service. In the bulletin, they ask everyone attending the potluck to bring a main dish, and a side dish or dessert. There has always been plenty of food. I love this guideline!

 

I work at a retreat center where we hold a potluck every week. Everyone just brings whatever. Sometimes it's been all salads, sometimes everyone brings pasta, sometimes a lot of sides and not many main dishes, sometimes none to little dessert, other times we have a good variety. I have a big family, so I make a lot of food anyways. I always try to follow my church's guideline when I cook for the retreat center potluck. Seems to work well for me. :)

[gardening momma]

However, when our Scouts have potlucks, we run out of food. Most families come with one small item that feeds 4 (even if they have a family of 8) or don't bring anything.

What I have been thinking throughout this whole thread is that some people do not understand what it means when someone says, "bring enough for your whole family." (I'm not referring to the people who have posted here, I'm thinking of the ones who don't bring enough to a potluck.) They think it means as much dessert as your family will eat, or as much pasta salad as your family will eat, etc.--when they have other things to eat as well. What it really means is, if you were to serve this at home, and your family doesn't have anything else to eat except the pie/salad, make sure you have enough pie/salad for your whole family to fill up on. Then it can be hard for them to visualize how much food that actually is.

 

As for the variety of dishes, here's a story (I may have related this in another potluck thread here):

My parents like to tell the story of a church potluck we went to when I was a kid. There were never any requirements or suggestions on what to bring, but this had not been a problem before. This time, everyone brought scalloped potatoes. After everyone had their food and was seated and eating, a family came in late. Everyone wanted to know what they had brought. They brought--scalloped potatoes! :D

Edited April 17, 2011 by gardening momma

[Tap]

I would just send out an email saying:

 

Here is what people have signed up for so far...

 

Main Dishes:

 

Sides (hearty sides may be a main dish):

 

Salads/bread:

 

Dessert:

 

Drinks:

 

Plates/Cups/Utensils/Napkins:

 

 

For anyone who would like to change or add to our list, please let me know and I will revise and resend the list in about a week or so. We are expecting about 40 couples plus children.

[In The Great White North]

What I have been thinking throughout this whole thread is that some people do not understand what it means when someone says, "bring enough for your whole family." (I'm not referring to the people who have posted here, I'm thinking of the ones who don't bring enough to a potluck.) They think it means as much dessert as your family will eat, or as much pasta salad as your family will eat, etc.--when they have other things to eat as well.

 

This.

 

I have been to plenty of potlucks where half the people didn't get to eat. Where a family of four brings a small dish of couscous. Or a pie cut into 6 pieces. And a few bring a 2 liter of soda.

[KristinaBreece]

Our pastor always asks us to bring three times what we would make for our own families-- that way there is plenty to accommodate everyone who isn't expected to contribute: the elderly, people who maybe can't afford to contribute as much, guests...

[SailorMom]

The norm in my circles is a main dish, a side dish or desert. These would be big enough for our family and one more. So - about 8-12 people.

[susankenny]

I think one covered dish or one dessert per family is usually sufficient. Our church assigns what each family is to bring according to our last name (A-K entree, L-Z dessert, etc), plus they have a sign-up sheet. Would this work?

 

 

Susan

[happypamama]

Our group generally uses helpersignup.com for potlucks, parties, etc., and it really works well. The person in charge can put something like "5 PB sandwiches, cut into quarters" or "gallon of juice" or "2 dozen cookies," and people can fill in as they want. It has made sure that we have had enough variety and plenty of food. We have a potluck coming up, and though they didn't make a sign-up sheet, each family has been asked to bring a main dish and one side/dessert/drink, and we've been asked to RSVP with the number attending plus what we're bringing so that they can keep track of it all. Whatever I bring, it will probably be one-and-a-half or two times as much as my family would normally eat of that dish.

[Audrey]

I have about 4 or 5 different dishes I will bring to pot lucks. I pick whatever I'm in the mood to make. I always bring it in the biggest pan or crock or bowl I own. We're a small family, so if stuck to the "rule" of what your family would eat, plus one, I be bringing a piddly amount of food.

 

I know there are always people who don't want to cook. That's why you can usually rely on those people to bring drinks or a tray of veggies or fruit.

 

That said, I greatly dislike the idea of "assigning" people stuff to bring to a pot luck. The whole point of potluck is that you never know what you're going to have! If everyone brings lasagna, then it's a lasagna pot luck. If everyone brings a dessert, then it's a dessert party. That's the whole fun of pot luck, and I really hate it when people organize the fun out of events. :thumbdown: I will bring what I want to bring, and if you don't like it, don't eat it!

[Impish]

I avoid potlucks like the plague. It never fails that there's next to nothing I can eat, and whatever I've brought runs out long before I get a chance to get to the table.

 

Even the kids and Wolf don't want to go to them, for the same reasons.

[RoundAbout]

I usually bring something like a big casserole dish of baked ziti or a large bowl of pasta or rice salad (I have 2 specialties that get rave reviews). There's only 3 in my family so the family+1 rule would feel like I was bringing too little so I go with what I would serve if I was having a small dinner party. If its clear that there will be plenty of main dishes or if I'm short on time I bring a huge platter of cut fruit (pineapple, grapes, melon, etc.) which could work as a side or a dessert. This is always popular if there are lots of kids.

Edited April 17, 2011 by RoundAbout

[ocelotmom]

I avoid potlucks like the plague. It never fails that there's next to nothing I can eat, and whatever I've brought runs out long before I get a chance to get to the table.

Same here.

 

Back when we lived in hippyland I could pretty much be assured of at least one thing I could eat. Here, I'm lucky if there's an iceberg lettuce salad with fat-free italian dressing.

 

Actually, potlucks are still better than non-potlucks, because at least at a potluck I can control what *I* bring. Non-potlucks generally end up being something like spaghetti or pizza.

[WistfulRidge]

What I have been thinking throughout this whole thread is that some people do not understand what it means when someone says, "bring enough for your whole family." (I'm not referring to the people who have posted here, I'm thinking of the ones who don't bring enough to a potluck.) They think it means as much dessert as your family will eat, or as much pasta salad as your family will eat, etc.--when they have other things to eat as well. What it really means is, if you were to serve this at home, and your family doesn't have anything else to eat except the pie/salad, make sure you have enough pie/salad for your whole family to fill up on. Then it can be hard for them to visualize how much food that actually is.

 

 

:iagree:With this... and sometimes this isn't a problem, but a lot of times it is. I don't know that I've ever been too a pot luck for which there was really enough food for everyone to actually have a meal.

 

When I was 15 years old and starting to do most of the cooking for any pot lucks my family attended a lovely southern woman gave me the pot luck rule that I live by -"Bring food enough for your family plus enough extra to feed a teenage boy". :lol:

[Ellie]

Yes, that's about right.

 

I would not have known this long ago, because I never attended a potluck until after I was married. Really. :-) Happily, I attended some potlucks early on that trained me properly. :001_smile: We did not bring a main dish *and* a side dish *and* a dessert, though. We brought enough of whatever we were bringing to feed ourselves plus a couple of others.

 

But remember that you're having a *potluck.* What you get is what you get. You could certainly add something to your list to remind people to bring enough for themselves plus a couple of others.

[love2read]

I've been to two potlucks this month where there wasn't enough food. At the first a family with 10 kids brought a package of 12 small rolls as their dish to pass. As soon as the blessing was said, the kids went up to the tables and served themselves first, taking huge portions. They ate and then went back a second time while others were still pouring drinks and helping in other ways. No one in authority knew what was going until it was too late. The family is new and people were too surprised to say anything. About 1/4th of the people got nothing to eat. At the other potluck, the families just bring small casseroles, not even enough for their own family. This happens month after month :glare: so I now bring a huge pan of ziti or potatoes and cheese plus another dish.

[Tracy]

I was always told the rule for potluck was to bring as much food as your family will eat, plus enough to share with another person or two. But now I'm wondering if other people haven't heard of that before?

 

:iagree:But our society's social skills have drastically declined. A lot of people just don't know the rule. And a lot of people have so little occasion to cook for groups that even if they know the rule, they may not realize how much food they are supposed to bring.

 

Is it tacky to ask those who've said they're just bringing a pie or a salad to bring something more substantial? I know the idea is that everyone shares a bit of this and that, but if no one else brings main dishes, it's going to be slim pickings...or is that just the risk one takes when hosting a "pot LUCK"?

 

Yes, it is tacky. I personally really resent when someone else tells me what to bring to a potluck, because then it is no longer a potluck. My cooking skills and recipe box are really limited, so I only have a handful of favorites that I can bring. And that depends on how much time I have, how much money I have, and what I already have on hand at home.

 

Consequently, when I host a potluck, I never tell anyone what to bring, and I don't ask anyone to report in advance what they are bringing. I just make sure to provide one large main dish, one large side dish, and some very easy snacking items, like chips, crackers, or raw veggies. That way, even if no one brings anything, everyone will be able to eat something. And I have never been to a potluck that was done this way that didn't have enough of everything. Sometimes, we have wished there was a little more, but there has always been enough. If your party is particularly large, you might want to get a couple of others that are close to you to do the same.

[Audrey]

I've been to two potlucks this month where there wasn't enough food. At the first a family with 10 kids brought a package of 12 small rolls as their dish to pass. As soon as the blessing was said, the kids went up to the tables and served themselves first, taking huge portions. They ate and then went back a second time while others were still pouring drinks and helping in other ways. No one in authority knew what was going until it was too late. The family is new and people were too surprised to say anything. About 1/4th of the people got nothing to eat. At the other potluck, the families just bring small casseroles, not even enough for their own family. This happens month after month :glare: so I now bring a huge pan of ziti or potatoes and cheese plus another dish.

 

 

I've been to potlucks like that, too. :glare: I tend to decline invitations to potlucks if I suspect chronic moochers are going to be there.

[vonfirmath]

At our current church potlucks do not seem to work well. At thanksgiving the organizers ended up running to the grocery store to make sure there was enough food for everyone to eat (bought deli stuff). This is the worst, but not the only time I've seen full-meal potlucks not work. Dessert potlucks end up with more food than one can eat

[prairiewindmomma]

I try to always bring a main dish that would serve 12 for the reasons that others have mentioned...

1. not everyone "cooks" anymore

2. not everyone is in a financial position to be able to provide a main dish

3. desserts tend to be easier/more socially rewarding to make

 

When a potluck dinner is held at our church, a signup sheet is sent around with slots for main dishes, salads, sides, and desserts. This is much more graceful, imo, than assigning A-F to bring mains, G-K to bring salads, etc. If not all of the slots are filled in for a given section, then an email is sent around asking for additional volunteers.

 

I never knew how many people were food-insecure until I *really* got to know them. I no longer make assumptions as to people having enough to eat (more precisely eat well) based on the car they drive, the job they have, or the house that they live in.

[Dobela]

I would be upset if I was specifically told to bring something else. Honestly, there have been times where I have been so financially strapped that a dessert would be a budget buster.

 

If you want more food, just do a general announcement. Are many people traveling a long distance to come to this gathering? If so, you may want to say in the general announcement that a big bucket of chicken or a pizza from The Hut would a great addition - or that foods don't have to be homemade to be brought.

[DesertDweller]

Most potlucks I've been to or planned, unless the main dish is provided, everyone brings a main dish and a side or a main dish and a dessert.

 

I typically make enough of one dish to feed 8-10 people regardless of my family size. I've found at potlucks most people will fill their plates pretty full. It's always best to have to much than not enough.

 

I don't think it would be wrong to send another email to clarify what your expecting or to get more specifics from those that are coming. If the planning isn't done up front, you'll end up with not enough food and your event won't go well. Better to speak up now then regret it the night of the potluck.

[ereks mom]

I was always told the rule for potluck was to bring as much food as your family will eat, plus enough to share with another person or two.

 

:iagree: Me too.