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#51 Amber in SJ

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 05:55 PM

Pizza & pets are wants; not needs.  

 

If you agreed on $75/ for random fun stuff then I'd say stick to it.  This is her learning to budget lesson.  She has a budget of $75.  How does she stretch it to make it work for what she wants?  It is the gentlest budget lesson ever because you are covering her needs already.  If she messes up & goes out too many times for pizza, she isn't going to be homeless, it will just come out of her savings.  If she wants to spend more than $75 on wants for the month then she needs to learn to give something up.  In my own home budget if I want to spend more in one area, I have to cut back in another.  Maybe a pet this month means less pizza.  Any extra should come out of her own savings.  Kids are generally more careful with their $$ than they are with yours.

 

We don't give our college age kids a fun stuff allowance.  We are straining to pay for the needs, we don't have cash for the wants. 

 

Amber in SJ


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#52 katilac

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 06:18 PM

 

It's been great for teaching them to budget and live within their means finding low cost or free things to do on/around campus - even if others have a bottomless pit of money.  'Tis the real world. 

 

The bolded, many times over. I know it can vary by campus, but if my kid told me there were no cheap/free things to do on campus, I would be checking that out for myself on the web site. And being comfortable with your financial decisions, and not giving in to peer pressure, is an invaluable life skill. 

 

We do not plan to get the full meal plan, so I am guessing a pizza would be cheaper than a meal on campus anyway, but the OP's situation may be different.

 

dd is going down on her meal plan next semester for solid reasons, and we will provide her with more groceries accordingly. We won't just give her all of the money, because I'm mean and want it spent on mostly healthy-ish food, otherwise she might as well stick with the meal plan (it's cheaper at her school than takeout). 

 

  

It is the gentlest budget lesson ever because you are covering her needs already.   

 

Very good point. She will not go hungry if she runs out of money. 


Edited by katilac, 23 October 2017 - 06:19 PM.

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#53 goldberry

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 06:46 PM

DD was told to save graduation money and the little bit of summer income she had (admittedly was not much) for school spending money.  She did not do so.  She has a meal plan, and we pay for necessities and school related items (but not trips or activities).  When she comes home we pay gas back and forth and take her shopping for groceries or necessities. 

 

She gets by on random grandparent money for the occasional pizza or Starbucks, etc.  She is struggling, but I'm trying to be tough and not give her any extra money so she will learn.  I confess this weekend I gave her $20 to take her best friend to Taco Bell for her birthday.  I was weak. :closedeyes:


Edited by goldberry, 23 October 2017 - 06:47 PM.

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#54 Prairie~Phlox

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 06:52 PM

Nothing, that's why they work.
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#55 Pippen

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 06:52 PM

What do you think is appropriate for a monthly allowance for a college student? This student has an adequate meal plan and all housing costs are covered. He/she uses the money for laundry, eating out occasionally, and other personal expenses.

 

Full disclosure: I thought $75 would be adequate and my child is wanting/spending more than that. Unexpected expenses: Uber to get to a film festival that was extra credit for Spanish class, a fish and supplies for said fish, an electric kettle (which I had offered to buy but was refused during college purchasing/packing season). Plus several Venmo payments which are claimed to be paying people back for pizza (I'm suspicious because it's my nature). Child has spent $150 this past month, some of which is additional funds I transferred, some of child's own money from savings.

 

What's "normal" for college spending above and beyond already-covered expenses??? I remember spending VERY little...

 

My minimalist son did it for under $50 most months the last 2 years. My daughter is probably right around $75 per month for laundry, bus, a few meals out, breakfast groceries, plus personal care items. I will say that she was well stocked up for make-up, etc when she went off to school. Both live in fairly low cost of living areas.

 

I put $500 in each of their accounts at the start of the school year and they'll stretch it as far as they can, and supplement with their own funds, which they handle/transfer as needed on their own. I don't want to have to mess around with monthly allowances at this age. The point is for them to learn to manage with what they have available to them. 

 

Also, I will add that we aren't paying for college. We pay for their meal plan and whatever else we can, but they pay for the bulk of their tuition, fees, and housing if they choose to go away.


Edited by Pippen, 23 October 2017 - 07:12 PM.

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#56 Kassia

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 07:58 PM

We paid for tuition, room, and board.  Our kids paid for any entertainment expenses, additional meals if they were on the meal plan, expensive meals out if they weren't out on a meal plan, etc.  Two worked during college and breaks, one only worked during breaks.  We really bought for their needs and they paid for their wants.  

 

 


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#57 Amber in SJ

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 08:05 PM

This may be a different topic altogether but we paid for tuition & fees, room & board, books, phone, insurance & travel for the first year.  The next year they paid for their own room & board and we paid the rest.  The third year and forward they are still on our phone plan, insurance and a couple other things but they pay for everything else on their own.

 

If you are choosing what to pay for & what to have them pay for you should pay the tuition because you can take the educational deduction from your taxes.  You can not deduct room & board from your taxes.  

 

Amber in SJ


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#58 Melissa in Australia

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 08:13 PM

Different country
My oldest got a government stripend. After paying his on campus room rent he had exactly$75 per fortnightly for food or whatever. Here in Australia on campus stay does not include a meal plan. he is very very careful with money.

I would always give him money to come home to visit.
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#59 Cindy in FL.

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 08:17 PM

We have two who are going to UF in the Spring after getting their AAs at a local community college. They were willing to do the first two years living at home and work at the family business to help cut costs so that we may be able to get their BS with no debt. We will pay rent, electric, and a reasonable amount for groceries and personal care items, If they want to eat out instead of cooking, they will have to supplement their food budget. They are responsible for their own entertainment/fun money. They will come home in the summer to work. We will probably have a budget of $75-100 per week for food, personal care, and gas to come home.

#60 umsami

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 09:21 PM

I would think that $25/week would be reasonable... not generous.  Friends who got less (and this was way back in the 80s), often resorted to donating plasma to help cover costs.  My parents were more generous, but I also worked on Campus, which gave me roughly $150 extra per month.

 

I think if you plan to change the amount, you need to let your student know. I do think it's a gentle budgeting lesson, and perhaps she needs more hands on help with budgeting.  It's not a skill everybody has.  



#61 elegantlion

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 09:26 PM

I do not give ds money. He has leftover money from summer and some from a small loan this year to pay his on campus expenses. Granted we commute, so much is taken care of anyway. I can, however, see how $75 would go quickly, even in my low cost of living area. 

 

Even over the last few years as a student, I've seen how costs have increased. If our group of friends goes out to eat, it can be hard to get away for under $10, pushing $15 on some days, we go to places where we can linger and chat. Even fast food meals are $6-8 anymore and we do try to eat more healthy than that. 

 

I have no idea how much laundry costs, but even at a dollar a load to wash and dry. If she does 2-3 loads a week, that's $8-12 a month. What about toiletries including feminine products, those can run up costs. Add other sundries to that list and say it runs up to $25 a month, then she has about $12.50 a week for fun. One meal out can use that. 

 

It can be hard to be the one in a group that has to adhere to a strict budget. You miss opportunities and then, yeah,  you end up owing people money because they don't want to leave you out. You also make excuses why you can't do things. It may not be one meal, it could be getting ice cream or coffees (which cost an outrageous amount on campus). And it's not always the same group of people, if you want to be involved with diverse groups, there is usually some monetary event involved during the week. 

 

If you don't have it to give, then you don't. If you feel like she needs to provide some of that herself, then there are jobs. If you've agreed to provide funds for activities, then I'd have her track realistically for a few weeks and then negotiate. 

 

I can see how $100 a month would be more realistic. I budget about $25 a week for my own school activities and that doesn't include any household expenses. 

 

 

 

 


Edited by elegantlion, 23 October 2017 - 09:31 PM.

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#62 AndyJoy

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 10:06 PM

$150 really doesn't sound unreasonable to me. My parents gave me $100 a month in 2000-2003. I had a 20 hour a week work-study job, but that went directly to tuition.

My expenses were things like:

Shampoo/conditioner
Razors
Soap
Period supplies
Laundry
General consumable school supplies
Photocopies
Printer cartridges and paper
Report covers for papers
Gas money for friends who drove me
A cup of coffee
Clothes, shoes
A book or magazine
The occasional movie, meal, or snack, especially dorm events or celebrating a friend's birthday or a wedding shower
Saving for gifts for family

I also did odd jobs on campus (study lounge supervision, tutoring) that paid cash and probably added $50 a month.
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#63 Tap

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Posted 23 October 2017 - 11:47 PM

In that situation, I would cover all school related expenses and things that help provide a basic need (ie kettle) and then $25 a week for fun no-questions-asked money.  I handle things a little differently with my kids, but in your scenario, that is what I think I would do.

 

My kids both have personal cars that I pay 100% of the expenses for, so just  that one expense easily tops $200 per month.

 

 

Ds22 paid his own expenses but kept a tally sheet of what I offered to pay for but came out of his wallet. Lunches, gas, books, supplies etc. Periodically, I would give him  a few hundred dollars to pay him back. 

 

For dd19, she has a prepaid credit card that has $200 a month put on it. She can use $100 per month without asking for whatever she wants (vast majority is cook at home food at her boyfriend's house and hygiene needs)....and the other $100 she can use if she lets me know what she is using it for. She is a good consumer and honest, so I trust her but I also don't pry too much. I don't want her to feel the need to lie if she overspends on the first $100.

 

 

That being said....dd19 is very good at saving money, and makes good decisions when spending money, so I have a level of trust with her that not all parents could have with their teen. 

 

Ds22 paid his own expenses but kept a tally sheet of what I offered to pay for but came out of his wallet. Lunches, gas, books, supplies etc. Periodically, I would give him  a few hundred dollars to pay him back. 



#64 KungFuPanda

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 01:22 AM

Dd probably spends about $200. She has a job, but let's us know when funds get low so we can do a transfer. She's very frugal, so we don't have to teach that lesson. I know she took a hit this month because cold medicine is expensive and she got sick twice. Feminine supplies are expensive too.

#65 DawnM

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 04:23 AM

 

 

dd is going down on her meal plan next semester for solid reasons, and we will provide her with more groceries accordingly. We won't just give her all of the money, because I'm mean and want it spent on mostly healthy-ish food, otherwise she might as well stick with the meal plan (it's cheaper at her school than takeout). 

 

 

 

At my son's school, going in on a pizza is cheaper, although we don't know all the financials yet and are waiting for the 2nd and 3rd sets of scholarships we are told are coming in.  We will most likely get him the 10 meals a week plan, expect him to have breakfast at his apt, take a few snacks with him in his backpack, and then he will be on his own for weekends.  At least, that is the plan.

 

But he has no car and doesn't drive, and I figure they will order in some for late nights, weekend get togethers, etc.....

 

 


Edited by DawnM, 24 October 2017 - 04:25 AM.


#66 DawnM

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 04:31 AM

What do you think is appropriate for a monthly allowance for a college student? This student has an adequate meal plan and all housing costs are covered. He/she uses the money for laundry, eating out occasionally, and other personal expenses.

 

Full disclosure: I thought $75 would be adequate and my child is wanting/spending more than that. Unexpected expenses: Uber to get to a film festival that was extra credit for Spanish class, a fish and supplies for said fish, an electric kettle (which I had offered to buy but was refused during college purchasing/packing season). Plus several Venmo payments which are claimed to be paying people back for pizza (I'm suspicious because it's my nature). Child has spent $150 this past month, some of which is additional funds I transferred, some of child's own money from savings.

 

What's "normal" for college spending above and beyond already-covered expenses??? I remember spending VERY little...

 

Answering these specific expenses:

 

You offered the kettle.  When he bought it wouldn't be an issue to ME.....you want it now instead of before?  Well, I offered to pay then, so I will pay now.  Not a big deal.

 

Uber for extra credit?  How much was that?  I might suggest my son catch a ride next time, or find out how to take the bus, but other than that, this wouldn't be a huge issue for me.  

 

Pizza, obviously this one seems to have people making judgement calls.....Unhealthy!  Unnecessary!  ....if it is an issue FOR YOU, then figure out how much you are willing to spend towards social pizza time and tell him that is all he can spend.    I don't really know what a Venmo payment is, is there a fee?  That I would be addressing.  I hate fees.



#67 Pawz4me

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 04:44 AM

Answering these specific expenses:

 

You offered the kettle.  When he bought it wouldn't be an issue to ME.....you want it now instead of before?  Well, I offered to pay then, so I will pay now.  Not a big deal.

 

Uber for extra credit?  How much was that?  I might suggest my son catch a ride next time, or find out how to take the bus, but other than that, this wouldn't be a huge issue for me.  

 

Pizza, obviously this one seems to have people making judgement calls.....Unhealthy!  Unnecessary!  ....if it is an issue FOR YOU, then figure out how much you are willing to spend towards social pizza time and tell him that is all he can spend.    I don't really know what a Venmo payment is, is there a fee?  That I would be addressing.  I hate fees.

 

Venmo is an app that can be used to transfer money from one account to another. There is no fee. DS21 uses it all the time. He has an off campus apartment with two friends--they pick up groceries and reimburse each other, or one of them buys cleaning supplies for the apartment and the others reimburse their share, etc. Or if DS uses the credit card for something he really should pay for with his own funds he reimburses us via Venmo.


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#68 Carrie12345

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 05:14 AM

I don't remember exactly how much I had, but it was from whatever was left over from my summer earnings after buying books.  I came from a single parent household where there was little "fun money" to begin with, so I knew how to live broke.  ;)

 

My son lives with his other parent and commutes to school, so it's different.  He earns his own money, which I'm not particularly thrilled with, but he wants more than I would ever agree to give him.


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#69 BlsdMama

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 05:48 AM

DS spent about $60 his first two months on campus. I think a lot depends on meal plans. The one he has is unlimited so snacking, etc., is covered. The dorm plan covers $75 of "bucks" put on a U card that can be used for laundry, printing, etc. We gave him money last week to offset some expenses for Mock. Their food during travel is not covered.

But honestly? I think your child telling you that's not enough and needs more is a sign your child needs a part time job. Takeout pizza is really not a need, it's a luxury in their budget. Also, if there is a bus system them Uber is also a luxury. Both of my college kids did or do work for their own spending moneyAND they cover college expenses.
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#70 Hoggirl

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 07:46 AM

Part of learning to budget is learning to make choices. Everyone has to learn to live within their means. It's just that not everyone has the same level of means. Additionally YOU have a budget and have to live within your means, too! So, if $75 per month is all you can comfortably afford to give him within your budget, that's the end of the discussion. If, however, you have the ability to give more but are just trying to decide if you should give more, I would have your child track his/her expenses to the penny over the next couple of months and tell them the purpose of doing that - to determine if a bit more should be given to him/her. Provide the opportunity to demonstrate to you that s/he is not being unreasonable/irresponsible and make a decision whether to up it based on that.

There will likely be a wide range of different socio-economic statuses represented at your child's school. Some paupers, some trust fund babies and everything in between. Sometimes students start running with a "richer" crowd that can make it hard to keep up if one's funds are limited. Being able to say, "That sounds fun, but I can't go - it's not in my budget," is a good life skill to learn. Likewise, for earning your own additional spending money above what mom and dad can or choose to provide.
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#71 creekland

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 08:17 AM

There will likely be a wide range of different socio-economic statuses represented at your child's school. Some paupers, some trust fund babies and everything in between. Sometimes students start running with a "richer" crowd that can make it hard to keep up if one's funds are limited. Being able to say, "That sounds fun, but I can't go - it's not in my budget," is a good life skill to learn. Likewise, for earning your own additional spending money above what mom and dad can or choose to provide.

 

I often wonder if those who don't learn this skill are the same folks that end up with a pricier house/car/lifestyle than they can afford once graduated.

 

My own kids wanted to copy our traveling.  I had to sit them down and remind them that they're seeing/experiencing our traveling now (and for the past 15 years or so out of a 29 year marriage).  We didn't start out with the income we have now and we didn't have the travel budget then.  They have to start off with what they have.  Talking with them worked (they're smart kids).  They have budgets.  They're saving.  They're still traveling, but it's more like a trip to Toronto by car and with friends sharing expenses rather than an overseas trip to Italy.

 

My med school lad has budgeted $8/day for food.  He's making it work - and is eating well, not Ramens, but not eating out all meals either.


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#72 Bambam

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 08:28 AM

We must be cold hearted parents.

 

Freshman year -We paid for tuition (after scholarships). We paid for housing. We paid for meal plan. We said if you want more money, get a job. You do have some savings - you could use that too. Welcome to the start of adulthood, child. If you look at purchasing things by how much time you would have to work to get that item, funny how those items aren't that desirable anymore. 

 

Sophomore year - We paid for tuition (after scholarships). We paid for housing. We paid for half your meal plan. You need to pay for other half. You want other things? Glad you found a better job this year! You are learning! 

 

Junior year - We will try to encourage child to cover more of her costs. 

 

Senior year - We will try to encourage child to cover still more of her costs. (Technically she could be finished in three years due to dual credit classes, but we will see).

 

After that, good luck finding a job! We will help, but you should plan and strive and work on being 100% independent by then (of course, she may still be on our health/dental/vision insurance). 


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#73 teachermom2834

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 09:03 AM

Just as a flip side to those who handled all/most expenses for their freshmen and gradually cut back on what was provided- we have done the opposite. My kids have/will pay most of their own expenses (including tuition bill) early in their school career. We help more as needed as the years go by.

For example, our current sophomore paid for everything his first year (worked a lot the summer preceding). He learned how to budget and the value of his education and he had to have lots of skin in the game before we contributed. But as we go on we will actually help more. He is already frugal and understands how to handle money so we aren't needing to teach that lesson anymore. Also, as he progresses towards graduation he needs more in terms of professional clothing to interview and he may need to take unpaid internships or seize opportunities that pay less than his previous summer jobs. He has an unpaid internship this semester that is a good opportunity but requires an Uber (not on public transport line). We are going to help more next semester to make up for all he spent on the Uber. He may eventually need a car or to pay rent over a summer and we will help with that as necessary.

Just another way to approach it. There are so many ways with the college financing. Each family has to do what works for them.
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#74 DawnM

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 09:27 AM

Venmo is an app that can be used to transfer money from one account to another. There is no fee. DS21 uses it all the time. He has an off campus apartment with two friends--they pick up groceries and reimburse each other, or one of them buys cleaning supplies for the apartment and the others reimburse their share, etc. Or if DS uses the credit card for something he really should pay for with his own funds he reimburses us via Venmo.

 

Interesting.

I have finally gotten my son to consider opening a bank account.  He has a credit card on our account now (he is still in Community College) and he uses it to buy a foot long Subway sandwich on Wednesdays.  He eats half for lunch and half for dinner since he is there all day.  We actually encouraged him to do this so that he WOULD socialize.  He can be a loner if given the choice.

 

The college he is going to in January has a "College Card" where parents can add funds.  It is like a debit card, and it can be used at all the cafeterias on campus, a few other food joints near campus, the laundry room, bookstore, coffee shop, AND a convenience store across the street.  

 

So, we can add funds to that, but I would really like him to get a bank account and start learning how to budget it and get a debit card.  

 

He rarely spends money and always asks first, so I am not worried at all, but I still think it would be good for him.


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#75 Pawz4me

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 09:32 AM

Interesting.

I have finally gotten my son to consider opening a bank account.  He has a credit card on our account now (he is still in Community College) and he uses it to buy a foot long Subway sandwich on Wednesdays.  He eats half for lunch and half for dinner since he is there all day.  We actually encouraged him to do this so that he WOULD socialize.  He can be a loner if given the choice.

 

The college he is going to in January has a "College Card" where parents can add funds.  It is like a debit card, and it can be used at all the cafeterias on campus, a few other food joints near campus, the laundry room, bookstore, coffee shop, AND a convenience store across the street.  

 

So, we can add funds to that, but I would really like him to get a bank account and start learning how to budget it and get a debit card.  

 

He rarely spends money and always asks first, so I am not worried at all, but I still think it would be good for him.

 

Our boys have had their own savings accounts (custodial with me as the custodian) since they were born. They got their own checking accounts and debit cards (and we also made them authorized users on one of our credit cards) around the time they were sixteen. Learning how to handle bank accounts and credit cards is definitely a life skill that all kids need.


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#76 DawnM

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 09:39 AM

Our boys have had their own savings accounts (custodial with me as the custodian) since they were born. They got their own checking accounts and debit cards (and we also made them authorized users on one of our credit cards) around the time they were sixteen. Learning how to handle bank accounts and credit cards is definitely a life skill that all kids need.

 

My kids only have IRAs, not reg. bank accounts, although middle son has one now that he has a job, he needed somewhere to put his checks.

 

I have no doubt he can manage his money.  Like I said, he hates spending anything, so I am def. not worried about running amuck with him.

 

I TRIED to get him to get a credit card or bank account at 16, but he refused.  FINALLY, after he realized he got caught on campus without cash or a way to pay for things, he got one.

 

This is my Aspie, there is no reasoning until he is ready or it affects him in some way.


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#77 mamakelly

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 10:05 AM

I have 2 boys in college. One lives at home, one does not. We do not give either of them spending money. The both have jobs and work 20ish hours a week to pay for their own expenses. When I went to parent orientation with my oldest, they actually suggested that all of the students have a job. They said it was good for them, and statistically, kids who work part time jobs have better grades. I thought that was interesting.
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#78 Wabi Sabi

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 10:15 AM

I was going by the OP, which only mentioned laundry as a necessity that came out of allowance. She may have meant "personal expenses" to cover some of the stuff you listed, but I thought it was mostly fun money plus laundry and the occasional necessity. 

 

We do buy my dd's necessities. Generally, we send them with her or have them delivered from Amazon. When she fills in at Walmart and such, she just lets us know. It's not that much money, really, maybe bc my college student really minimizes laundry and cleaning, lol. Personal hygiene would be the biggest expense, I think, but no more than it was at home. 

 

Did your mom just refuse to listen when your sister told her that the school did not supply her with tampons??  

She really just didn't care/couldn't be bothered. She was rather neglectful (and downright abusive as well) as a parent. 



#79 StephanieZ

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 11:21 AM

We budget $50/wk for "blow money" in college. (Snacks, treats, laundry, outings, toiletries/minor clothes, beauty/hair cuts, etc.) This assumes we've already paid for all the major start-up groceries, clothes, etc. And they get an unlimited meal plan Freshman year, too. (And after that, when they live off campus, we budget separately for groceries/meals out/etc.)

 

It has worked well so far and I think is pretty generous. If the kids want/need more, they take it from savings/summer earnings/etc. 

 

We can afford to be generous because both our college kids earned huge merit scholarships. If that hadn't happened, we'd budget less, and expect the kids to work more during breaks/summers to cover it. There are plenty of other kids who earn all their "blow" or "spending" money (and other things, too, of course). 

 

I do think this would vary a good bit school to school. Some student populations are very affluent . . . and I want my kids to be able to feel comfortable, not like the poorest or richest of their classmates, so we budget accordingly. I also want them to learn good habits, so I want them budgeting, too, as it's not a good habit to always have the ability to meet every want . . . but I want them to be able to afford enough wants that they aren't too inhibited from having fun and going out with friends, etc. If 90% of their classmates had fun by going out to $$ restaurants every weekend, that'd be tough. If they were in a Greek organization where they were expected/required to spend hundreds/thousands on matching outfits many times per semester, that'd blow our budget . . . (and another good reason we discouraged Greek life . . .) Our kids go to a big state school with kids of varying financial backgrounds that are generally within our ability to afford . . .


Edited by StephanieZ, 24 October 2017 - 11:21 AM.

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#80 Pam in CT

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 12:35 PM

It really depends on where they are and what expenses you expect them to cover.  If the campus is out in the boonies, an uber out and back from the nearest Target can come pretty close to eating up $75 in one excursion to re-supply toiletries... but if your student is in a city on a bus line, that kind of expense will be rarer.

 

We've always done a set amount for the semester and leave it to them to manage.  They pay for everything except plane/train tickets home, which either I arrange or they put on an "emergency" credit card.  (I do not want them to be weighing the tradeoff between "expensive dinner date" vs "visiting Mom," LOL.  COME HOME, KID.)

 

 

We also do a "matching grant program" at tax time, in which we contribute into retirement accounts in their names the equivalent amount to their total summer and part-time job earnings... which has proven to be a surprisingly effective motivator. 


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#81 Seasider

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 12:49 PM

Hmm. Aside from meeting essential needs, I don't think it's right for one of my college kids to expect me to provide them funds for recreation when dh and I are strapped on recreational funds for ourselves. And in our case, that's about what it comes down to.

DH is adamant about requiring each to submit a budget - at the very least a sort of broadly itemized list of anticipated expenses - before kicking any more than that occasional unexpected $20-from-Dad-on-the-handshake. He is not overly judgy about these "budgets," he mostly just wants to know that he's given them cause to contemplate where their money is actually going. I think it's a good policy.
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#82 Lori D.

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 12:55 PM

Guess we are tightwads, because NO monthly college allowance here.

 

DS had a meal plan, dorm, and books/supplies all covered by us, as well as insurance and travel to/from college. We also paid for the phone plan so he could text/video chat regularly, and call if he had an emergency. He had no car on campus, so no auto expenses, so any additional financial needs -- entertainment, the occasional haircut/clothing item, outing, or fun thing -- was on him from his savings from having worked in the summers.

 

I will add that DS is pretty minimalist, and didn't go off campus much for meals because he had an unlimited amount for each meal. And in typical guy-fashion, he only did 1-2 loads of laundry once every 2 weeks, so he came home with quarters and laundry supplies that I had sent. ;)

 

 

ETA:

OP -- In response to your list of DD's expenses of Uber for transportation for an extra credit event, fish tank (?!?!), and pizza paybacks to friends... just me, but those expenses are on my child, if I'm already paying for tuition room & board, books and basic supplies. And the kettle -- gee, too bad she turned down a freebie. Lesson learned (by her).

 

If the child had a bank account (which our sons did, since early high school), my response to the child: "Great! Sounds like you are doing a fine job of being responsible in paying for those unexpected expenses that crop up in life! If you find you're getting low on funds, that may be a sign it's time to look for a part time job to replenish. So, tell me about that Spanish event -- sounds interesting!"


Edited by Lori D., 24 October 2017 - 03:35 PM.

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#83 MissShellyA

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 04:45 PM

I definitely don't think $75 sounds like enough. $150 seems like a pretty reasonable number, but I might go as high as $200 TBH. Money doesn't go as far as it did when we were in school, and from it sounds like she isn't being exorbitant, just doing some normal college kid stuff.



#84 transientChris

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Posted 24 October 2017 - 06:43 PM

I think we were doing 75 every half month so 150. That pays for gas (She has to travel to doctors and pharmacies), co-pays until I pay her back for them, toiletry supplies, extra food ( she has food allergies which sometimes means she isn't getting enough at the cafeteria) some meals out, and some events- usually at the 5 dollar range because her university provides students with tickets to pricy events but has them pay only 5. She also buys presents with that. We don't require her to work since she has disabilities that make her take a lot longer than others to do the same work particularly if it involves reading. If it was just her computer work, she wouldn't need extra time.

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#85 Katy

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Posted 25 October 2017 - 04:12 AM

I was given $200/month in the late 90's, but I lived far enough away that if I needed help with anything I had to pay for it myself, my parents couldn't come help because it was an 18+ hour drive away from either parent.  I was also at a school in a tiny town that didn't really have many part time jobs available - they were mostly work study, which I didn't qualify for, and other work was farmed out to adults from the area not college kids. I think I applied for 24 jobs before I gave up.  Oh, and my meal plan didn't supply all my meals, so about half was spent on food. 

 

I did spend far too much on takeout, movies, and party entrance fees though.

 

I guess if I knew the kid was in a city with plenty of part time minimum wage jobs available I'd tell them to get a job first, and if not I might consider $200-300/month, depending on the situation - more in New England, less in the South or Midwest, etc.



#86 Quill

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Posted 25 October 2017 - 06:17 AM

Hmm. I’m not sure. I don’t give my college student a regular allowance, but I do put a couple hundred dollars into her account a couple times a year. I also send gift cards for Amazon and Starbucks in care packages sometimes. Other than that, she spends her own money from her summer job if she needs to buy gas or eats at a restaurant with friends. I do pay for things like hair cuts, but her hair is long and she only gets it cut a few times per year.

She has a full meal plan at college.