Correcting someone else's spelling?

[mamaraby]

Let's say the coach of your child's sports team signs all of his emails "Couch So and So." At first you think it's a typo or an autocorrect issue, but he does it every time both when referring to himself and when talking about being a "couch" in the body of the email. Having met him in person, I can guarantee he is not an upholstered piece of furniture.

 

Aside from entertaining me every time I read his emails, it also gives me the urge to correct his spelling so he can be a coach and not a couch. People maybe aren't so thrilled when you correct their spelling or word usage so I'm wondering if there's etiquette for this situation.

 

So, what say the Hive? Should I privately tell the coach it's spelled with an "oa" or should I just let him run around calling himself a piece of furniture? If I do say something, how does one say this without coming off as pedantic.

 

I should just ignore it, right?

Edited April 28, 2017 by mamaraby

[Paige]

You shouldn't say anything unless you are close friends. Nod and smile. Roll your eyes internally. Don't bring it up. I understand how you feel, however. I have a friend, actually a close friend, who doesn't conjugate her verbs in writing. I scream inside when I read it, but I have noticed it in her family members' writing as well. I would never correct her because she is not my child, my spouse, or my employee. 

Edited April 28, 2017 by Paige

[SquirrellyMama]

Have you sent him an email with a big Hi COACH So & So, and hope he catches on?  Maybe do it like this COACH. 

 

Maybe make it blink, or change colors :)

 

Kelly

Edited April 28, 2017 by SquirrellyMama

[catz]

I would mostly just ignore it.  Although, in a return e-mail I would correct the word like "Dear Coach Bob - Tommy will be 10 minutes late for practice on Tuesday.  Thanks for coaching!  Suzie, Tommy's mom"

[SquirrellyMama]

Use coach as many times as you can. 

 

Hey Coach Lou- Just wanted to say thank you for being such a great coach. Your coaching is awesome. I've never met a coach as good at coaching as you. Thanks again Coach Lou!

 

 

Edited April 28, 2017 by SquirrellyMama

[mamaraby]

Have you sent him an email with a big Hi COACH So & So, and hope he catches on?  Maybe do it like this COACH. 

 

Maybe make it blink, or change colors :)

 

Kelly

 

 

Lol, I have definitely spelled it correctly when emailing him, but I have not altered font size or blinkability. :)

 

Use coach as many times as you can. 

 

Hey Coach Lou- Just wanted to say thank you for being such a great coach. Your coaching is awesome. I've never met a coach as good at coaching as you. Thanks again Coach Lou!

I think you get extra bonus points for using the word coach that many times in a sentence! :D

[Monica_in_Switzerland]

This is hilarious.  

 

but seriously...

 

 

I will stand out form the crowd and say tell him.  He might be embarrassed, but... I mean, come on, it's a lot more embarrassing to be a couch for the rest of his life.  You could maybe make it funny, like send him a message that says:

 

World's Best Couch

---with a picture of a couch here---

World's Best Coach

---with a picture of him here---

 

 

[SquirrellyMama]

I wonder how he spells couch? Kelly

[lavender's green]

I used to be part of a circle of internet-friends who were total grammar and spelling Nazis. They'd openly correct people in forums and comment threads (they thought they were doing it politely...) and moan and moan about Standards and The Decline of Civilization and Proper Education.

 

One day I realized these people were actually all bores.

 

I don't want to be a bore.

 

I don't correct people's spelling and grammar.

 

(Unless it's my job or it's a close friend and I know beyond a shadow of the doubt that they want to get it right)

[Rachel]

I had a friend who misspelled his business name. Once he had the logo on his car, we let it go.

[happi duck]

I agree with others to not correct but just use the word coach when you can.

 

I wonder if this is perhaps an inside joke.

[Word Nerd]

I had a friend who misspelled his business name. Once he had the logo on his car, we let it go.

 

A local business has a name similar to Girl's n' Guy's—which makes my eye twitch every time I see one of their vehicles.

 

Irrational confession: If a business intentionally misspells its name with a cutesy spelling like Kountry Krafts or whatever, I won't shop there.

[mamaraby]

I wonder if this is perhaps an inside joke.

Maybe? But what most made me want to correct his spelling was when he used it in an email to another team's coach when the other team wanted to reschedule a game. I know for sure he doesn't know this other coach. So...if it's an inside joke, it's not one that people are aware of.

[luuknam]

For most words, I wouldn't say/do a thing, but since this is his actual job title, yeah, I would talk to him after practice or something. 

 

ETA: I was also wondering if it was maybe an inside joke.

Edited April 28, 2017 by luuknam

[EKS]

I wouldn't correct him, but I would use the correct spelling in my communications with him.

[teachermom2834]

I would not correct him. Someone else will, eventually. Probably by calling him "Couch Smith"

[luuknam]

I would not correct him. Someone else will, eventually. Probably by calling him "Couch Smith"

 

 

So, the ideal plan is to wait for someone to be a jerk?

[teachermom2834]

So, the ideal plan is to wait for someone to be a jerk?

Um, yeah. Honestly I don't know that is jerkier than pulling someone aside and instructing them on their spelling. A formal correction is more awkward for some people than good natured joking around.

 

Without knowing all the personalities it is hard to know how the coach would feel. I wouldn't want to be the person to bring it up.

 

Honestly most of the people in my life would be cool with the kidding around and laugh it off. But it is possible I run with a mouthy sarcastic crowd.

[J-rap]

No, you shouldn't correct another adult's spelling, but I can't tell you the number of times I have wanted to...

 

 

[luuknam]

Um, yeah. Honestly I don't know that is jerkier than pulling someone aside and instructing them on their spelling. A formal correction is more awkward for some people than good natured joking around.

 

Without knowing all the personalities it is hard to know how the coach would feel. I wouldn't want to be the person to bring it up.

 

Honestly most of the people in my life would be cool with the kidding around and laugh it off. But it is possible I run with a mouthy sarcastic crowd.

 

 

I could see how that might be with some people... too many unknowns (which is why I didn't mention whether I'd start with something about wondering whether he's dyslexic or whether I'd start with "what's the joke about the couch thing" or some other option altogether).

[Scarlett]

No, you shouldn't correct another adult's spelling, but I can't tell you the number of times I have wanted to...

How about husbands?

[bettyandbob]

Like the pps, I'd not correct, but when I sent return emails I'd address them

 

Coach ------, 

 

so that he saw the correct spelling on my email. 

[Tangerine]

My DH's name is a name that has recently become popular for children, but was super uncommon when he was growing up.  His name has the traditional spelling with one N.  He has worked with people for 5 years, and emailed them every day, and signed his name, as well as having his name as his email address.  And for 5 years, people will respond and spell his name with 2 Ns.  Not just one person, but many people. So I would not count on putting the correct spelling in front of his face having any effect. 

[Guest]

How about husbands?

I do. He'd rather he have me point it out than to have a business colleague see it.

[Murphy101]

This is hilarious.

 

but seriously...

 

 

I will stand out form the crowd and say tell him. He might be embarrassed, but... I mean, come on, it's a lot more embarrassing to be a couch for the rest of his life. You could maybe make it funny, like send him a message that says:

 

World's Best Couch

---with a picture of a couch here---

World's Best Coach

---with a picture of him here---

That is a fabulous humorous and graceful response! I vote doing this.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I would not say a mumbling word, in a million years.

 

1. If he's in his thirties and forties in the USA and can't spell coach, it is NOT because he's had inadequate access to the word.

 

2. I don't care whether he can spell, I care whether he can coach.

 

3. He's probably aware of his deficiencies (most people are), yet somewhere along the line he realized that his strengths were still valuable, and he could contribute, instead of being defined by his weaknesses. Which works until people come along and focus on his weaknesses.

 

Be an encourager. The whole league knows he is misspelling it. People far closer to him than you, have chosen to allow this to go on...they probably know the battles he has fought and won, and are glad to see their friend using his talents to coach the kids. Maybe he actually does know, but only because somebody told him, but he decided to leave it, so that kids who can't spell will know their coach can't spell either, but that's OK when we're playing baseball. Who knows.

 

This hits home for me today, because last night at baseball I was talking with the coach's mom, who was telling me how it's taken him all the way into his early 40s to believe in himself, and to truly understand the tremendous difference he makes in people's lives. This man appears to me as a confident, intelligent, self-made man, who helps make his church, kids' school, and community as successful as they are...plus he's made a pile of money, building his own business...but for most of his life he had to see himself as someone who wasn't as book-smart and didn't understand social rules. He's mostly over that now, as he is undeniably a success, but I would not be the one to remind him that vestiges of that struggle are still obvious.                       

[Guest]

I take it from the perspective of how I'd feel if corrected - it would be embarrassing, but like having your dress stuck in your tights it's better to know than be oblivious. That said, I'd handle the correction like Monica suggested. Humor always works better on this sort of thing, in my experience.

[gardenmom5]

you can correct him by using it spelled correctly in something to him.

[Guest]

I wonder if his autocorrect/grammar dictionary was accidentally changed. You know how when you misspell a word and it pops up suggestions, but if you click too quickly you can accidentally hit "save to dictionary"? (I least I can do that!)  I have certain words that I perpetually mistype and I have made the mistake of accidentally clicking "save to dictionary" on more than one of this. I wonder if that's what happened here, except on the grammar check end. I've had to go into the actual dictionary and delete the misspelled word or else I know I would have erroneous words going out in emails all the time. Even though I might know how to spell the word, my fingers don't always cooperate. Throw in autocorrect with a saved incorrect spelling or grammar and bam. I could see Couch Smith having this happen in that case. 

 

Either way, I'm not sure I would say anything, although I'm a huge fan of the blinking red coach font by PP. :)

Edited April 28, 2017 by texasmom33

[J-rap]

How about husbands?

 

Oh I think you can correct your husband!   :)

[mamaraby]

A couple of things -

 

*The league definitely doesn't know him. It's his first year with our club and the league is big enough that you wouldn't necessarily know the other coaches. Partially this is because there are a lot of new coaches and turn over so let's not read more in to this than needs be.

*He has impeccable spelling otherwise and is what I would consider well educated. Of all the emails and texts I've seen this is the *only* word I've ever seen him misspell. Also, his grammar is otherwise fine. He's either in a supervisory role at work or business owner and fairly self-confident.

*I'm the team manager so I see lots of emails and other sorts of communications. I always refer to him as "Coach So and So" in the emails I send out on his/the team's/the club's behalf so I do use the correct spelling in a way that he sees many times. So many emails. :p

 

I like Monica's idea, and I would totally do that to my dh or my family. Still not sure just how coach would take it. I'm just going to let it slide same as I did last season. I will continue to giggle and picture an over-stuffed tan couch with those tufted buttons everytime I see him refer to himself as "Couch So and So." I don't know why that's the kind of couch that always comes to mind, but it totally does.

Edited April 28, 2017 by mamaraby

[happi duck]

Maybe someday you'll be able to ask "I'm curious why you always write couch instead of coach. Is it some sort of inside joke?"

[Scarlett]

I would not say a mumbling word, in a million years.

 

1. If he's in his thirties and forties in the USA and can't spell coach, it is NOT because he's had inadequate access to the word.

 

2. I don't care whether he can spell, I care whether he can coach.

 

3. He's probably aware of his deficiencies (most people are), yet somewhere along the line he realized that his strengths were still valuable, and he could contribute, instead of being defined by his weaknesses. Which works until people come along and focus on his weaknesses.

 

Be an encourager. The whole league knows he is misspelling it. People far closer to him than you, have chosen to allow this to go on...they probably know the battles he has fought and won, and are glad to see their friend using his talents to coach the kids. Maybe he actually does know, but only because somebody told him, but he decided to leave it, so that kids who can't spell will know their coach can't spell either, but that's OK when we're playing baseball. Who knows.

 

This hits home for me today, because last night at baseball I was talking with the coach's mom, who was telling me how it's taken him all the way into his early 40s to believe in himself, and to truly understand the tremendous difference he makes in people's lives. This man appears to me as a confident, intelligent, self-made man, who helps make his church, kids' school, and community as successful as they are...plus he's made a pile of money, building his own business...but for most of his life he had to see himself as someone who wasn't as book-smart and didn't understand social rules. He's mostly over that now, as he is undeniably a success, but I would not be the one to remind him that vestiges of that struggle are still obvious.                       

 

 

I am mostly in this camp.  My husband is very very intelligent and can build anything, design anything.  Spelling though?  SMH.  He just never managed to 'get it'.  Sometimes I cringe and say nothing and sometimes I speak up (in private of course) .

 

The OP says this coach has other wise perfect spelling so I am inclined to think he has some mental block about the word or as someone mentioned his auto correct is messing with him.  

 

I would want to know. But I can easily see how it would be better to not say anything depending on the person.

[Jen500]

I see flyers and messages from some coaches with typos/grammar mistakes/ spelling errors quite a bit.

I would never say anything. Coaching is their main thing and an awesome coach is such a blessing. How they coach and treat the kids and act on the court/field is more important to me.

[HTRMom]

Ok, maybe this is silly. At the end of the season, you could give him cut out construction paper letters in a card, scrambled, to assemble himself. "t h a n k s c o a c h l o u !

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Slache]

I would want to be corrected.

[Garga]

I've been wrestling with this sort of thing myself. A new group formed in our church and it's something like Moms Are Cool. (That's not the name, but it's like that.)

 

And in the electronic newsletter that comes out and in the paper bulletin it's written Mom's Are Cool with the apostrophe. It's been this way in the past 3 bulletins.

 

I keep wondering if I should tell anyone and if there's a way to do it annonymously.

 

Wait! There is! I can put a note in the offering or something. I wonder if anyone would read my note? Or just shake their heads and toss it in the trash? Worth a shot...I'm going to do it on Sunday. :)

[Guest]

I've been wrestling with this sort of thing myself. A new group formed in our church and it's something like Moms Are Cool. (That's not the name, but it's like that.)

 

And in the electronic newsletter that comes out and in the paper bulletin it's written Mom's Are Cool with the apostrophe. It's been this way in the past 3 bulletins.

 

I keep wondering if I should tell anyone and if there's a way to do it annonymously.

 

Wait! There is! I can put a note in the offering or something. I wonder if anyone would read my note? Or just shake their heads and toss it in the trash? Worth a shot...I'm going to do it on Sunday. :)

For what it's worth my phone loves to autocorrect moms to Mom's. I have to edit it every single time. And if I was using Pages on here to make a document it would happen there as well.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I generally don't correct other people's spelling.

 

I am a fairly decent speller, but I have caught myself confusing these two words for some reason.

 

 

[Scarlett]

I generally don't correct other people's spelling.

 

I am a fairly decent speller, but I have caught myself confusing these two words for some reason.

 

 

Which two words?  Coach and couch?

[KungFuPanda]

"Dear Coach,

 

I think your auto-correct is out to get you.  I noticed in the last few emails that you signed your name 'Couch Simpson' and I know you don't want people to think you are a piece of furniture.  I just thought I'd let you know in case nobody else saw this.  I know I'd want to be told.

 

See you soon,

 

Parent"

 

Generally I would say don't correct anyone's spelling except your own students because it is no use and may only cause hard feelings.  In this case, it's in the coach's best interest to know how to spell his own title.  I think it's kinder to point it out so he can possible avoid an even more embarrassing situation in the future. 

[Word Nerd]

Although it is impolite in general to correct other adults' spelling errors outside of a professional context, I disagree that simply pointing out a spelling error is focusing on or defining someone by their weaknesses. Posters have already offered several suggestions for calling attention to the mistake without being a jerk.

[teachermom2834]

"Dear Coach,

 

I think your auto-correct is out to get you.  I noticed in the last few emails that you signed your name 'Couch Simpson' and I know you don't want people to think you are a piece of furniture.  I just thought I'd let you know in case nobody else saw this.  I know I'd want to be told.

 

See you soon,

 

Parent"

 

Generally I would say don't correct anyone's spelling except your own students because it is no use and may only cause hard feelings.  In this case, it's in the coach's best interest to know how to spell his own title.  I think it's kinder to point it out so he can possible avoid an even more embarrassing situation in the future.

Definitely blame auto correct!! That is so much more tactful than telling him he is making a spelling error.

[mamaraby]

"Dear Coach,

 

I think your auto-correct is out to get you. I noticed in the last few emails that you signed your name 'Couch Simpson' and I know you don't want people to think you are a piece of furniture. I just thought I'd let you know in case nobody else saw this. I know I'd want to be told.

 

See you soon,

 

Parent"

 

Generally I would say don't correct anyone's spelling except your own students because it is no use and may only cause hard feelings. In this case, it's in the coach's best interest to know how to spell his own title. I think it's kinder to point it out so he can possible avoid an even more embarrassing situation in the future.

I actually think of the two options (three?) in this thread, this one seems the most likely thing I would do. Most everyone knows autocorrect has a mind of its own and is probably a plot by the machines to take over by embarassing the humans. And even if it isn't actually the case, it definitely gives an easy out for the other person to scapegoat autocorrect and save face.

 

Plus, then he is no longer referring to himself as a couch so it's a win-win.

Edited April 28, 2017 by mamaraby

[Slache]

Hey, coach! Did you know your phone keeps auto correcting coach to couch?

[maize]

Hey, coach! Did you know your phone keeps auto correcting coach to couch?

I would do this :)

[Scarlett]

"Dear Coach,

 

I think your auto-correct is out to get you.  I noticed in the last few emails that you signed your name 'Couch Simpson' and I know you don't want people to think you are a piece of furniture.  I just thought I'd let you know in case nobody else saw this.  I know I'd want to be told.

 

See you soon,

 

Parent"

 

Generally I would say don't correct anyone's spelling except your own students because it is no use and may only cause hard feelings.  In this case, it's in the coach's best interest to know how to spell his own title.  I think it's kinder to point it out so he can possible avoid an even more embarrassing situation in the future. 

 

 

I like this because it gives him a graceful out if he really just did not know how to spell coach.  

[DesertBlossom]

My DH's name is a name that has recently become popular for children, but was super uncommon when he was growing up.  His name has the traditional spelling with one N.  He has worked with people for 5 years, and emailed them every day, and signed his name, as well as having his name as his email address.  And for 5 years, people will respond and spell his name with 2 Ns.  Not just one person, but many people. So I would not count on putting the correct spelling in front of his face having any effect. 

 

My FIL spelled my name wrong for years until I managed to bring it up in a light-hearted manner. It annoyed the hell out of me though.

[DesertBlossom]

I also think some people are just really bad spellers. I mean smart, successful people who still can't spell.

[Tanaqui]

If his spelling is generally correct, and his grammar is standard, then it's probably an autocorrect error. If that's the case, then - assuming you're being reasonably polite! - it's probably okay to bring it up.