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lavender's green

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About lavender's green

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    Hive Mind Larvae

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    North Carolina

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  1. Spam. Some dish my mom called "sh!t on a shingle." Toast with a nasty salty white chunky gravy plopped on top. Potato soup that my grandma made. Huge slices of potatoes and onions simmered in water for not nearly long enough, with a dash of milk, and a ton of black pepper. It had a nasty texture and no taste, except for the onions. My parents' meatloaf, cooked with a thick layer of ketchup on top. Every single one of my aunts had their own version of that jello salad stuff, and they'd get extremely offended at holiday meals if I didn't try theirs. I was a compliant, people-pleaser child, and I have ten aunts. Never again.
  2. MIL kept all of DH's legos, then gave them all to us, because they are preparing to move. We regret taking them in (along with everything else she saved). It was cute at first, to have Daddy's legos and old toys to play with. But DH is not particularly sentimental, and the kids prefer the modern sets, things they've read the books/seen the cartoons of, not what was around way back when. Now we just have too many legos, and most are in the attic. But speaking as a Mommy, I'd probably hold onto them too, as long as I had the storage space. :)
  3. I have mild scoliosis and sometimes get back pain. Exercise and stretching are the best preventive measures for me.
  4. How about sweet potatoes anna? I use half the butter, a lot less salt because I don't have coarse sea salt, and usually paprika instead of aleppo pepper. The whole family loves it.
  5. I feel sad and literally sick over this. And yet hopeful, after the latest reports.
  6. I would add, be very, very careful about who you let direct your spiritual life. My heart about broke when I saw you were worried about being narcissistic. I think pastors don't always consider the impact of what they say on people who have anxiety, or difficult family relations, or recovering from being raised by a narcissist (if I'm remembering your other posts correctly). The things they say can really eat at you, and can feed anxiety and trauma. That's why if I don't get the God Our Loving Father vibe from a church, I'm outta there.
  7. As someone who's suffered anxiety on and off at various points in my life, I think it's best to face the source rather than avoid it. BUT there are other ways to face social anxiety, assuming you're not totally isolating yourself. I, too, would hate to the single person in a class of couples. No wonder it's hard to strike up a conversation! As to the message, I think at different points in your spiritual life you need different things. Sometimes you need to hear the hard truths. Sometimes you need to hear about the depth of God's love for you. Sometimes you need to serve others, sometimes you're in survival mode and need to let go and let others serve you. Sometimes a church is just not a good fit after a while, because spiritually you're somewhere else, or the social aspects/expectations are grating on you. Above all, God is our Loving Father, and if you're not feeling the Loving Father part, I think it's time to find a different church, or scale back your participation in that church, if it's socially important to the rest of your family.
  8. We'll be visiting relatives for Easter so...who knows. I don't have high hopes. Our hotel has a kitchenette, at least. When we get back, I'm making baklava and a cheesecake. Maybe with lemon curd folded in and a drizzle of raspberry coulis on top.
  9. Thanks for the recommendation. I've often thought that my son (and his brother, who according to teachers is showing yellow flags for autism) has a lot of normal human traits. It's the combination (and sometimes the extremity) that pushes it into diagnosable territory. The ADHD with social delay is interesting. Now that my kid is in school, the areas where he needs support seem to point more toward attention issues.
  10. Just an anecdote - I know a young adult female with autism, and one day the thought popped into my head that, wow, if she reproduces she could potentially be the monster-in-law from Hell. Not because she has any meanness in her, not at all. She just comes off as judgmental and disapproving, because she doesn't know how to modify her facial features, laugh at the right time, or stop staring with a stony expression on her face. I believe that she doesn't have a judgmental bone in her body. Her brain just doesn't function that way. Once in a while she'll say judgey things, but she's just repeating what she's heard from her parents and teachers. Couple that with the fact that her obsessions is babies, and I can just see her stealing the newest grandbabies to cuddle, totally ignore the older ones, laugh at her DIL's jokes in a way that comes across as bored, and stare at her in a way that seems to say "I hate you and your parenting abilities." When really she's just being herself and she's worked very hard to get as far as she has. Which reminds me, one of our assistant preschool teachers is just like that. My kids don't like her. Even at the age of 3, my daughter can sense that something is off, and can't connect with her. And it's sad because she really, really likes them, and she's gainfully employed doing what she loves to do. I know she has adult children. Which is all to say, sometimes when I hear MIL stories, depending on the details, I wonder if ASD is behind it, and the poor MIL is just doing the best she can with what nature gave her.
  11. Just speaking for myself...the vision insurance offered through my DH's work is good if you want expensive glasses and cheap contacts. But I want the expensive sensitive eye daily contacts and a pair of cheap backup glasses (but nice ones! Not the bargain bin at the office!). I came out far ahead last fall when I ordered glasses online for the first time, thanks to this thread. It was also nice to not have a salesperson breathing down my neck - I can only think of one in recent memory who was actually helpful. I could take my time and really think through the shape and color, and I'm a lot happier with this pair than I was with most of the ones I got at the optometrist's office. I used eyebuydirect and their FAQ says: Do you accept insurance? Unfortunately we are not currently affiliated with any insurance companies. However we can provide you with a detailed copy of your invoice along with our tax ID number so you may request for reimbursement from your insurance company. We accept flexible spending accounts (FSA) or health savings accounts (HSA) for purchasing prescription eyewear or sunglasses. However, the FSA and HSA cards need to be affiliated with a major credit card
  12. I also can't handle a large calorie deficit. After a few days I'm on the couch wondering why I feel like death warmed over. Getting enough protein and fat helps, but still...I'm more of a "no snacks, sweets, or seconds except on days that start with S" kind of girl. And plenty of exercise of the type that doesn't ramp up my appetite. And easy on the carbs because of family history of diabetes. I think that some bodies would rather go into sloth mode than lose weight when they don't get enough calories. I know I need to go slow and steady if I want to lose weight and still have normal energy levels.
  13. My house has lots of windows and very little wall space. The piano is in a corner of the living room, opposite the couch and a little to the side, the place where you might put an accent chair. The back of it slightly overlaps a window, and there's a window on its side just in front of it. There's also a floor vent just in front of it, under the window. I know, I know, horrible placement because of temperature fluctuations, but the piano was old and free. The only place with more wall space is by an outer door with greater temperature fluctuations, and tends to get ants.
  14. I'm going through a name change right now. It's my understanding that you want everything to match up. The process is a hassle, but you don't want it to become a much larger hassle in the future.
  15. What about a picnic basket or picnic backpack? We got a picnic backpack when we were engaged or newlywed. So cute. It came with plates, utensils, a picnic blanket, napkins, little salt and pepper shakers, and a cheese knife and cutting board. The backpack was insulated and since it was small, it was easy to bring along every time we moved.
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