Jump to content

Menu

First run ins with the school dress code...


LisaKinVA
 Share

Recommended Posts

So, "hoodies" are not allowed.  I asked if they define "hoodie."  They don't.  DD's jacket has a hood, the only difference (style-wise) between the jacket and the zip-up hooded sweater is the thickness/type of the material.  Do nice sweaters with "hoods" count as hoodies?  What about pullover shirts that have hoods?  Are the kids not allowed to wear the school spirit sweatshirt, sold by the school...which yes, has a hood?

 

Shirts.  No tanks (of any type), no cap sleeves, no shirts with cut-outs (even on the sleves).  Shirts below the waistline must be tucked in.  Leggings may only be worn if the shirt is long enough to fully cover the bottom. 

 

Do shirts include sweaters which are not meant to be tucked in?  But often fall below the natural waist?  What about blouses, which are also not meant to be tucked in (poet style, for example, loose blouses that are flouncy?)

 

Jeans must sit at the natural waist (dd is very high waisted, they do not make jeans with that high a rise). Jeans are not allowed to be "tight."  I asked if they define "tight" -- because the school allows leggings?  Plus, most of the jeans dd wears are a bit stretchy...are they then Jeans or Leggings?  Of course, sweat pants aren't allowed.  DD has a long skirt made out of sweatshirt material...I kind of want her to wear it just to be rebellious.  The only thing not allowed with skirts is length and see-through material

 

At this point, I wish they'd just go to a uniform already.  The teens are so frustrated, even THEY would prefer a uniform.

 

They are trying to avoid "distracting" clothing and "unprofessional" attire.  

 

I wonder what they would do if I sent DD in a nice pencil skirt, with a fitted peplum blouse...and a cute pair of pumps.  Because I'm sure she'd be distracting in THAT, although it is typical of professional wear from where I worked, and those I worked with.

 

To be clear, I am not anti-dress code.  But, this dress code has been changed and amended to the point of being nonsensical.  DD tries on her outfits at night to determine if they are within dress code.  Her closet is filled with classic/preppy-leaning clothing, there really should not be a question about.  But, half of it is banned by the dress code (layering sweaters, that have holes, that are worn with tank tops...very cute and still modest and non-distracting). 

 

 

 

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does the shirt below the waistline part apply equally to boys and girls?  I am pretty sure that our public high school here allows girls to have untucked shirts that length but not boys. 

 

Interestingly, our public high school bans "patterns" on boys shirts.  So those gingham and plaid oxfords that used to make me swoon are banned.  Pretty much solid color polos and dryfit type tshirts are all that is allowed here (this is in Florida so sweaters and sweatshirts are really not relevant).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does the shirt below the waistline part apply equally to boys and girls?  I am pretty sure that our public high school here allows girls to have untucked shirts that length but not boys. 

 

Interestingly, our public high school bans "patterns" on boys shirts.  So those gingham and plaid oxfords that used to make me swoon are banned.  Pretty much solid color polos and dryfit type tshirts are all that is allowed here (this is in Florida so sweaters and sweatshirts are really not relevant).

 

I'm getting this from my daughter, so my guess is yes.  She's wearing a fitted sweater (looser on the top, but fits snugly around the waist and hips) tomorrow.  She's worried that she'll get dress-coded, because her shirt isn't tucked in.  My son wears his shirts tucked in anyway...even with a belt.  Except for sweaters.  He is disappointed that he can't wear his Championship Swim Team long sleeve T with hood he earned last year...it has a hood.  I do need to get DS more pants, though.  But, I have to order them at about $60 a piece, because that's the only way to get some that fit.  Thankfully, dress slacks can be ordered to fit the waist and then hemmed.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does your daughter have any idea how well it is actually enforced?

 

As far as I can tell my son's public high school has very few rules (all skirts or shorts must be no shorter than where the fingers reach when the arms are down the the side, no underpants showing, no straps thinner than the wearer's index finger, and something about no disrespectful language, and something vague about nothing transparent that displays undergarments or lack thereof) but ds1 says that it clearly isn't enforced all that much. He is pretty sure that if you are not going over the top or misbehaving no one is checking the length of shorts or skirts. He has absolutely seen kids with shorts that are shorter than allowed and no one said a thing. They weren't crazy booty shorts, more like athletic shorts, just not as long as the rules said.

 

One thing I appreciate is the dress code is gender neutral. There is nothing in there that would only apply to girls or only to boys and my son did say that they used a man's tank top to illustrate the 'wider than an index finger' rule on sleeveless shirts. My son frequently wears tank tops and he checks them all before he buys them.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shirts below the waistline must be tucked in.  Leggings may only be worn if the shirt is long enough to fully cover the bottom. 

 

 

This makes NO sense.  :willy_nilly:

 

You can wear leggings if your shirt is long enough to cover your bottom, but if your shirt goes below your waistline, it must be tucked in, which means it won't cover your bottom... yet you can wear leggings if your shirt covers your bottom.

 

I think if the administration has so many rules, they should just require uniforms.

  • Like 15
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does your daughter have any idea how well it is actually enforced?

 

As far as I can tell my son's public high school has very few rules (all skirts or shorts must be no shorter than where the fingers reach when the arms are down the the side, no straps thinner than the wearer's index finger, and something about no disrespectful language, and something vague about nothing transparent) but ds1 says that it clearly isn't enforced all that much. He is pretty sure that if you are not going over the top or misbehaving no one is checking the length of shorts or skirts. He has absolutely seen kids with shorts that are shorter than allowed and no one said a thing. They weren't crazy booty shorts, more like athletic shorts, just not as long as the rules said.

 

Several kids have been sent home, or had phone calls home, or notes home already (on day one).

 

They changed the dress code over the summer, so kids came wearing clothes they wore last year and were given violations.  One girl wasn't technically violating the dress code, but there was something about the lining in her skirt that "wasn't quite right."  The dad was pretty ticked, because he said the only way you'd even notice was to really look.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm confused.  How can a shirt be long enough to cover ones bottom if shirts have to be tucked in.

 

 

THIS is what I was thinking!!

 

 

You know, on one hand, I hate uniforms.  I'm one of those people who likes to do purple hair and bright lipstick and pigtails and big earrings (maybe not all at once, but then again, maybe) and I'm all for creative expression.  I used to think I would absolutely hate for my kids to go to a school with uniforms.

 

But Idk, reading all that, it makes my head spin.  Good grief.  

 

 

 

As for the no tight jeans but leggings being okay, that makes sense to me.  I mean, I wear both lol, but I would assume that if the jeans are super tight it would be like being able to wear leggings with a shirt that doesn't cover the bum.  Since the leggings rule includes the covering the bum portion, that excludes them from being like jeans, whereas tight jeans would show off the bum more.  

Granted, I don't know what classifies as 'tight'.  Like, jumped off the roof to get into them tight or like, fitted tight in a flattering way?  

 

Anyway.  I digress lol...

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

As for the no tight jeans but leggings being okay, that makes sense to me.  I mean, I wear both lol, but I would assume that if the jeans are super tight it would be like being able to wear leggings with a shirt that doesn't cover the bum.  Since the leggings rule includes the covering the bum portion, that excludes them from being like jeans, whereas tight jeans would show off the bum more.  

Granted, I don't know what classifies as 'tight'.  Like, jumped off the roof to get into them tight or like, fitted tight in a flattering way?  

 

Anyway.  I digress lol...

 

I just don't know what they mean by "tight"  Most of DD's jeans are straight-leg or tapered-leg jeans.  They are slightly stretchy -- but she doesn't have to struggle to put them on, there's no camel toe (for lack of a better description).  But, they fit like jeans should fit around the bum and hips.  I'm not sure how jeans are supposed to fit otherwise, unless you're insisting on a relaxed-fit jean (do they even make those for girls?).  My mom would consider DD's jeans "tight" -- but my mom thinks girls should only wear skirts and dresses.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

To me, those don't sound 'tight' in the sense that I would think the dress code would mean.  I would consider them fitted.  

 

I guess I'd say if one can move comfortably/unhindered in them, they're fitted but not tight?  Idk.  

 

 

Again, what a pain.  Korean school uniforms are super cute.  I know you aren't in Korea, but they should just do those instead.  Lol!!!   :D

 

 

 

 

 

Obviously, the above uniforms are stylized.  The look, however, is still quite similar, and I think they're much cuter than any American school 'uniforms' (khakis and a polo) that I've seen.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

To me, those don't sound 'tight' in the sense that I would think the dress code would mean. I would consider them fitted.

 

I guess I'd say if one can move comfortably/unhindered in them, they're fitted but not tight? Idk.

 

 

Again, what a pain. Korean school uniforms are super cute. I know you aren't in Korea, but they should just do those instead. Lol!!! :D

Oh My!! Even I think those are super cute!!

 

And, I'm part of the creative expression crowd. For example, My 8 year old DS attended Catholic school last year with orange hair. Then blue hair. Then green hair. Right now he's currently sporting "flamingo pink", which is actually more of a purple.

 

ETA: His natural color is currently dirty blonde.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oh My!! Even I think those are super cute!!

 

And, I'm part of the creative expression crowd. For example, My 8 year old DS attended Catholic school last year with orange hair. Then blue hair. Then green hair. Right now he's currently sporting "flamingo pink", which is actually more of a purple.

 

ETA: His natural color is currently dirty blonde.

 

Link had green a couple years ago, and blue earlier this summer.  Astro was going for bright red but it turned copper instead - so his hair was the color of a penny early this summer.

Pink wanted pink but we never got around to it.  She wants to be Strawberry Shortcake for Halloween so I said we can just do it then.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

To me, those don't sound 'tight' in the sense that I would think the dress code would mean.  I would consider them fitted.  

 

I guess I'd say if one can move comfortably/unhindered in them, they're fitted but not tight?  Idk.  

 

 

Again, what a pain.  Korean school uniforms are super cute.  I know you aren't in Korea, but they should just do those instead.  Lol!!!   :D

 

Those for girls remind me of cheerleader outfits.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Our district has uniforms. And yet they actually spell out in the manual that students cannot wear slippers to school.  Uniforms help a lot but there are still plenty of kids who will do their best to bend the rules.   Lisa, I think your kids' school has too many rules...set a few and enforce them. They are making it difficult for kids and parents to even know how to interpret all their rules!

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

No cap sleeves?  

 

What if the shirt isn't past the waist?  

 

No hoodies?  Really? 

 

I would just buy my kid a standard school uniform (khaki pants or skirt, polo shirt, saddle oxford shoes).  Maybe it would start a trend.  

 

BTW, my 10yodd LOVES Asian school uniforms, and would love to go to a school where everyone wears them.

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm confused.  How can a shirt be long enough to cover ones bottom if shirts have to be tucked in.

 

I was confused at first with this too but it is possible to follow both rules if you take them literally by wearing leggings with a shirt long enough to cover ones bottom and then tucking it in.  It doesn't say that the shirt must COVER the bottom, only that it must be long enough to be able to cover the bottom.

  • Like 12
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would just buy some uniform clothes. This is what I like about uniforms: there's nothing to puzzle through. My DS's school has what I consider the perfect uniform requirements. They are specific enough that you don't have to constantly wonder what is acceptable, but they are flexible enough that kids get to display some of their individual styles and interests.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I loved wearing a school uniform. One less thing to cause stress. Simple and easy.

I just heard on the radio about some businesses where the employees had voluntarily created a uniform for themselves, like perhaps a navy suit, white shirt, red striped tie. Or a lady might wear a navy skirt, a white blouse and a navy jacket. Same outfit combination every day (not necessarily the exact same pieces). They said it is better, they save 30 minutes trying to put together an outfit because they always know what to wear.

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I was in middle school, shorts were not allowed in the winter months.  In Pennsylvania.  Really.

 

The guys decided that this was completely unfair, as the girls were allowed to wear (very short) mini-skirts all year.

 

They talked to the administration about making a change to the dress code.  No luck.

 

So, some of them decided to wear mini-skirts to school...   :coolgleamA:

 

Oh, if social media had existed then...

 

IIrc, the dress code quickly changed to allow shorts all year.   :laugh:

  • Like 19
Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I was in middle school, shorts were not allowed in the winter months.  In Pennsylvania.  Really.

 

The guys decided that this was completely unfair, as the girls were allowed to wear (very short) mini-skirts all year.

 

They talked to the administration about making a change to the dress code.  No luck.

 

So, some of them decided to wear mini-skirts to school...   :coolgleamA:

 

Oh, if social media had existed then...

 

IIrc, the dress code quickly changed to allow shorts all year.   :laugh:

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/09/swedish-male-train-driver-protest_n_3410743.html

 

Although at my son's school he was told very clearly that boys are permitted to wear skirts and dresses, just as girls are permitted to wear pants, as long as they meet dress code requirements. Honestly, in this town I am not sure anyone would bat an eye.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

In schools I attended with a "shirts must be tucked in" rule it only applied to button-ups, not t-shirts, sweaters, etc. Maybe that was the intention? I seriously doubt they intend for a tunic top to be tucked into leggings, though it would be pretty amusing to try and point out that it is long enough to cover the rear but tucked in since it's past the waist :)

 

My high school adopted a uniform the year after I left. My sister was quite the fashionista and complained vehemently until she discovered how easy and stress-free it made her life. The uniform requirements were simple: pleated, Dockers-style pants in any color or a finger-tip-length skirt, a polo shirt in any color, and a black or brown belt.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

So, I went to the school website, and read the old dress code. It's fine.  I think the problem is that the NEW dress code is not in writing.  They have been informed of things ad hoc.  The old dress code is easy to understand and follow.  I'll have to request a copy of the new dress code in writing, because it's not available online. And yes, some teachers will enforce the dress code very strictly -- while others only enforce egregious issues.

 

Personally, if the information isn't available to families, I'm not sure how they can hold students accountable for it.  

 

ETA:  I'm going to put together some cute "uniform-style" outfits for dd to wear.  Thankfully, she only has to worry about this for 2-3 days a week.  But she way over-thinks everything.  I'll pass everything through dd...

 

Denim Cowboy skirt with her boots, comfy sweater

Lands' End Skort with peter-pan blouse, tights, maybe a blazer with a button-down shirt/tie, or a wrap blouse.

Jeans...a couple pair, some assorted polo-style shirts, long sleeve Henley's, and a couple of cute sweaters.

Khakis...probably same shirts as with the jeans.

Leggings...with a warm sweater tunic

 

That is my list for her at this point.  I'll keep all of the "school" clothes on one side of her closet, and she'll just have to pick and choose from those.  We're set to go to "Shoe Alley" in October for shoes (giant shoe flea market).  And, I need to get one pair of her boots fixed, too.

 

DS just needs pants...and shoes.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was confused at first with this too but it is possible to follow both rules if you take them literally by wearing leggings with a shirt long enough to cover ones bottom and then tucking it in.  It doesn't say that the shirt must COVER the bottom, only that it must be long enough to be able to cover the bottom.

 

This is exactly what I was going to suggest the OP's daughter do ... point out the contradictions in the rules by following this particular one literally: show up at school wearing leggings with a long shirt tucked in. If they told her the shirt had to cover her bottom, it would be easy enough to untuck it, but maybe while doing so, she could point out that now she's disobeying the dress code. If someone later told her her shirt must be tucked in, say ok and tuck it back in. Keep a record of every time someone in authority told her she wasn't meeting the dress code and provide a report to the principal.

 

Of course that may not start the year off on quite the right foot ... and it probably wouldn't result in any real clarification of the dress code, just a ban on leggings.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ours is more strict than that.  They come right out and say you can't wear hoods except on your winter coat, and don't even buy a shirt that isn't long enough to be tucked in.  (Sweaters worn over a shirt don't have to be tucked in.)  All shirts / dresses must have a collar, no sweat material or denim material, no leggings except under a dress, etc. etc.

 

In 1st grade, the kids were supposed to wear shorts for field day.  So my kids did.  My kids have small butts so their shorts were preschool size, and thus, well, short.  My 6yo was given a warning because her shorts didn't go down farther than her middle finger.  Really?  Who cares at that age?  And no, I'm not going to go buy a pair of long shorts just to meet your silly rule once a year on field day.  :p

 

Because of the "no hoods" rule, I searched for the perfect fleece zip-up overshirts (with collars!) so they could layer on cold days.  They were told those were not allowed because they were "jackets."

 

As for leggings.  I stopped buying "pants" (or jeans) for my kids years ago, because they don't like them and they never fit right.  Small butt issue again.  Even with an adjustable waistline, they look ridiculous.  Leggings don't look ridiculous because they are not tight on my kids.  However, they are not allowed with a long t-shirt, so forget it.  My kids never dressed down on dress-down day because they couldn't meet the dress-down dress code!  :p  However, they do take that opportunity to wear, say, a dress without a collar.  :p

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Love, love, love uniforms.

 

My DD has white polo shirts with school logo.  She has navy shorts, pants or skirts to wear with those shirts.

 

White dry fit for sports days with blue athletic shorts.

 

Once a month the school has a dress up/dress down day when the kids can wear whatever they want.

 

Seems to keep everyone happy!

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

Again, what a pain. Korean school uniforms are super cute. I know you aren't in Korea, but they should just do those instead. Lol!!! :D

 

LOL ...those are actually adult " costume" uniforms worn by K pop girl groups or advertising girls who pass out flyers for new restuarants....the " schoolgirl look" which is super popular.

 

The actual uniforms the kids wear are way more modest and less fashionable...they would get kicked out of school if they wore those. lol

  • Like 9
Link to comment
Share on other sites

When i was a kid no-one wore uniforms until high school in the country or intermediate in the city. No one of any sex was permitted to wear trousers or any kind at any time except for on camp. Boys wore shorts all year round and girls wore shorts or skirts and were also allowed to wear tights. Now the school my son attends is one of the few primaries in the area without a uniform. They have a no hoodies rule but at times it has been almost impossible to get polar fleece without hoods and provided the don't wear the hoods up it is ignored. Basically the rules are to dress for practicality not fashion. I am not looking forward to uniforms as my son gets dirty frequently and one pair of uniform trousers would buy five pairs of cheap tracksuit pants. One outfit is more than I spend on both kids for a year.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Uniforms are great as long as the girls have the option to wear pants. I have memories of freeeeeeezing in my school uniform skirt for many winters in a row. It was terrible. And we were forced to wait outside for school to start for 20-30 minutes in the morning and had a mandatory outdoor recess. I was a little popcicle.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I just heard on the radio about some businesses where the employees had voluntarily created a uniform for themselves, like perhaps a navy suit, white shirt, red striped tie. Or a lady might wear a navy skirt, a white blouse and a navy jacket. Same outfit combination every day (not necessarily the exact same pieces). They said it is better, they save 30 minutes trying to put together an outfit because they always know what to wear.

 

Wish I could find a reference to the following.  I remember reading a brief magazine article within recent years about some woman who had a ridiculously large number of identical black dresses hanging in her closet and they constituted her wardrobe.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think with the leggings, they are trying to allow a particular look, which is leggings with a long tunic.  Effectively, it looks like a shift dress with dark tights.  Which is actually a nice style that would work well for school.

 

I think it is a reactionary list of rules, and that is why it seems to make no sense - they have just made up rules to cover problems as they come up.

 

I have a lot of sympathy for schools trying to make up dress codes.  They are often required, because the kids will wear things that really are just inappropriate  (my cousin who just graduated recently used to show up at my house in outfits that were just so embarrassing.)  And the line drawn will always be a little arbitrary, and they can't be seen to give different treatment, often even when it might make sense, so the rules end up being applied either inflexibly or inconsistently.

 

We had a big kerfuffle recently in the news about a girl being told not to wear a backless maxi dress - halters and bare backs were against the rules.  She argued, essentially, that this was a sort of slut-shaming, and the school got a lot of flack.  It didn't seem to occur to her (or the adults that supported her who should have a little more experience) that pressure on girls in high schools to dress provocatively can itself be a problem, both for girls and boys.

 

In many cases I think the schools probably can't make a policy that won't have people making a fuss, but in any case, this policy seems poorly thought out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wish I could find a reference to the following. I remember reading a brief magazine article within recent years about some woman who had a ridiculously large number of identical black dresses hanging in her closet and they constituted her wardrobe.

Here's an article about the overall concept. http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2012/10/25/famous-folk-wear-fashion-uniforms/1638893/

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I was a kid, school uniforms for girls were always short short skirts.  I don't understand that.  Aside from the distracting/self-conscious aspect of it, isn't it uncomfortable to sit on a chair all day with bare thighs?

 

Now they seem to have a lot of reasonable options at most schools that use uniforms.  Although some are still a bit silly IMO.

 

I must admit I've wished my kids had uniforms more than once.  :p  I do buy a lot of their clothes from uniform makers, mainly because there aren't many other options that meet our school's dress code.  Now for grades 4 and up, they have a rule that if girls wear jumpers, they have to be "uniform type" jumpers.  I'm not sure why that is.  But it's really hard to find non-uniform jumpers (or school-appropriate dresses or skirts) anyway for that age group.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...