Princess5 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 To make him more strong and daring? My DH thinks karate will be good, but I think 3 yo in it is too young, any other suggestions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retiredHSmom Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Take him to the playground. Let him climb to the top of the big slide by himself if he wants. Let him be a child. Three is too young for organized sports. 15 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
displace Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Our homeschool karate instructor teaches 3 year old kids. That being said, I doubt they are actually stronger or more daring! :). It's mostly teaching patience and attention, more valuable to me. Haha. Swimming is great for upper body strength, as well as gymnastics. I doubt anything can make a three ear old become more or less adventurous. Mine at that age either do, or don't do, as they will. But maybe others have suggestions? ETA - I think a lot of kids try things other children are doing, so maybe watching another child do something will encourage one to try it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Southern Ivy Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Why does he need to be stronger and more daring at 3? Does he refuse to try anything new or is this more of a "he's not as daring as dh and I were as kids" type thing? Some kids are just more cautious, my 3 year old included. We mistake their observational skills for timidity, rather than realizing that just like adults, they sometimes need to assess the situation before they are comfortable. It's not right or wrong. It's just their own unique rhythm. That being said, 3 is not necessarily too young for karate. 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zinnia Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 My 3rd son isn't highly motivated to be physical, unlike his two older brothers. When he was about 3.5, we realized that he could be pushed harder than he was, and he'd be happier for it. My dh started taking him hiking. Now, this is a family affair, often, but sometimes, it's one on one, and it's always a little stretch for the now 4.5 year old. Something about being outside makes it more exciting to stretch yourself and cross those rocks in the creek or climb over a downed tree or hop through mud puddles. Hiking with him has been one of the most fabulous things that we've done for him. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 I agree with the playground. Let me loose and let him explore and try new things. Hikes/walks are good too. You can base the length and difficulty on his abilities. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MysteryJen Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 We had a wonderful time with preschool gymnastics. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Playground. We spent hours daily at the park. Walking a lot. Hikes with the family. Rock climbing. My kids hiked their first mountain on their own feet when they were 2 (yes, it required a lot of patience on part of us parent - but it paid off). They were rock climbing when they were 3. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Ditto the gymnastics recommend! The YMCA has "rat pack" which is play-based gymnastics. It's tons of fun, gets them stronger, and lets them push themselves in a safe environment. That said, some kids are just clingy. I'd talk with the teacher and take it easy. Maybe do a mom & me kind of class where you can be close. Swimming would be good for that and they have mom & me classes for gymnastics too. There's no need to push him to be alone. Have you had his eyes checked? He could have some convergence issues, depth perception issues, or other instability going on that's coming out as reserve physically. You'd go to www.covd.org and just get a normal annual check but get it with a developmental optometrist to let them screen for those things. You also might get one of those tow bikes to go behind the parent bike. We do that with my ds and he adores it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 If you are looking for an organized activity, gymnastics is a great place to start. It teaches kids how their bodies move in space--transferable to any other sport/physical activity. Our gym also had a fun long trampoline thing that little kids love. It's like a big, bouncy runway with a huge mat at the end to jump onto. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Don't let him see your anxiety when he dares to do something slightly dangerous, like climbing high or balancing. Resist saying, "Careful!" when he's out on his trike or at the playground. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carriede Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Yes to hiking. We went to Stone Mountain when DD was 2. She climbed up the WHOLE WAY. Totally unexpected. Something else we've done with the kids is to put a 2x4 put in the yard on the ground as a low balance beam. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slache Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 We've taken our son on 2-5 mile hikes since he could walk. He can run/jog 5 miles with me now with few walking breaks. He's a stud. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 If he is having issues with coordination (Is this the kid with speech issues?) then you might want to look into other services, such as speech therapy and pt. Anyway, when my then three year old needed to work on coordination and strength in an organized way we took him to swimming lessons, gymnastics and dance classes. He is 10 and is still not a strong swimmer, but last year he seemed to finally get the hang of it. Swimming works on over all strength, but you have to keep up with it. Dance has been really wonderful for him as well. It works on many of the same skills as martial arts, and you can usually find classes for 3 and 4 year olds. My son is older now, 10 years old, and he still studies dance and now martial arts as well. This is a kid whose physical therapist thought he might never learn to ride a bike. But he did learn! And it was his dance teacher who taught him how to skip, that was a big one for him to learn. Another thing that has helped tremendously with coordination and strength etc is piano lessons. Piano is really a whole body experience. It calls on many, many skills at once. When my son started at age 4 his core muscles were so weak that he occasionally fell face first into the piano, no lie! But, now at 10 he is a great muscian. I just wish that hand dexterity had improved his hand writing. But I guess it would be that much worse if he didn't play piano? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Yes to hiking. We went to Stone Mountain when DD was 2. She climbed up the WHOLE WAY. Totally unexpected. Something else we've done with the kids is to put a 2x4 put in the yard on the ground as a low balance beam. That's an achievement for a 2 year old! The last time I did it I was around 40 and I was pretty darn proud of myself. I bet your girl napped well on the way home from Stone Mountain! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 My kids at age 3 did preschool dance, gymnastics, karate, soccer shots, swim lessons, and a mix-it-up class called "stretch'n'grow." Each was 30 minutes, one day per week. (Except for swimming, these were offered at their preschool, yippie!). In addition we did lots of walking, park time, free swim, etc. I don't think the organized stuff made my kids more strong and daring. My purpose for having them in those activities at that age was so they could develop body awareness and related stuff. None of them were particularly vigorous. :P I think the things more likely to make them strong and daring were unstructured park time, walking, hiking, and swimming. You could also try bike riding (without training wheels) and see if your child is ready. (Mine would try but didn't balance until age 4.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 BTW I do not believe 3 is too young for kiddy martial arts. I think it's a great idea, but I don't think it will make a child "daring" really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess5 Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 Thank you all. Our Y has some gymnastics, maybe good place to start and now that spring is coming up lots of playground time. I think he is just fine just like someone mentioned he is cautious. I want him to freely dare without thinking, but maybe that is not his personality. He loves to ride his balance bike, play in playground. His preschool teacher mentioned that he is cautious on wall climbing( not sure how big it is, will check it out) even though she is very close and he is still working on hopping freely. He can do 1-2 at a time and then starts again. When DH flies him in air he is not comfortable to enjoy, very soon says stop. My dad on the other hand loves the air flying which DH does. Just differences in kids I guess Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess5 Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 Oh and we didn't get his eyes checked so far, didn't think of it, Im pretty sure he's fine. He is fine to go to preschool on his own. No separation issues or anxiety Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Preschool gymnastics classes were fun for my kids too. As were mom/child swimming lessons. We enjoyed parent/child music at that age too. All that said, I think the best thing is to have lots of outdoor time to explore and play. Some kids are just less daring than others. I have one kid that was a super daring preschooler, and another kid who was a very cautious about trying new things physically as a preschooler (but does great now - dances 4 days a week, she still doesn't like heights though). Just because a child is cautious at 3 doesn't me they will be their entire life. I was a very cautious kid but a daring and independent young adult. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 . I think he is just fine just like someone mentioned he is cautious. I want him to freely dare without thinking, but maybe that is not his personality. The bolded: why? Thinking before doing something is a commendable trait. You'll be VERY glad of that once he is a teenager. 14 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Thank you all. Our Y has some gymnastics, maybe good place to start and now that spring is coming up lots of playground time. I think he is just fine just like someone mentioned he is cautious. I want him to freely dare without thinking, but maybe that is not his personality. He loves to ride his balance bike, play in playground. His preschool teacher mentioned that he is cautious on wall climbing( not sure how big it is, will check it out) even though she is very close and he is still working on hopping freely. He can do 1-2 at a time and then starts again. When DH flies him in air he is not comfortable to enjoy, very soon says stop. My dad on the other hand loves the air flying which DH does. Just differences in kids I guess It sounds like he might have some sensory issues. My eldest used to really hate being swung on a swing or swung around (and a few other things). She was also very timid about walking at first. She is actually really athletic. She taught herself to pump her swing at age 2 because it bothered her less than being "pushed." She did many physical things early. But she had this odd thing with orientation/balance. She seemed to grow out of it by around age 5. I would watch for things he really enjoys and do more of those. As he builds more core strength and body awareness, he may grow out of the quirks you mention above. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 Skuut bike? www.skuutbike.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 as someone who had a kid with coordination and balance issues, being a little cautious can be a good thing. Maybe he knows what he needs. As he becomes more sure of himself he will become more likely to try things. But, if he doesn't feel secure in himself then that is what needs to happen first. That happens with repetition and mastery. But, if you push it too quickly or if he gets hurt you are taking a chance he will just back off. Not with all kids, but some. And some kids are just plain old more cautious than others. It takes all kinds to make the world go round, right? So, just follow his lead because he knows what he needs. And one thing to consider, kids with weak core, balance issues etc can also have endurance issues. They get tired more quickly because they are legitimately working harder than their peers to cover the same ground. This can last a long time. If he says he is tired halfway through a hike or whatever believe him. He isn't lying or trying to manipulate you or anything. He might be really tired. My son needed breaks during school just from sitting in a chair. Holding himself upright and writing etc was actually exhausting to him. 45 mins of that seat work was like me driving the car for 5 hours, tiring mentally and physically. When he was two and three, well, I carried him a whole lot and had to be patient even when I wanted to tell him to stop complaining and just walk like a big boy. FWIW, he is now 10 and super active and very accomplished. He is a great ballet dancer and martial artist. He's sort of a sloppy runner (all over the place, lol) but so are many of his peers, and he is weak swimmer. But, summer is coming and I have no doubt he will be back in the pool working his little heart out. He WILL master swimming! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T'smom Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 When my oldest was about that age we had a little routine that we did. We would go for a walk, the same walk every time and at certain places we would do things. For example, at the fire hydrant we would race to the sign, at the bridge we would hop like bunnies, where there was a raised edge on the boardwalk, he would walk on it like a balance beam. We would run around the gazebo and throw rocks into the river. The same thing every time. We did it for a different reason, my ds needs to burn energy- the walk was 2 miles and there were two parks that we played at. He's just one of those high energy kids. But the same idea could work for you, if he jumps and skips and gallops, he'll get stronger. I don't know about the daring part though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momacacia Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 I climbed up on the playground with oldest. She might never have gone anywhere until she was 7 without my doing that. I was careful to not push too hard, but encouraged her to try new things and to just a little further when it seems she could. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luuknam Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 I want him to freely dare without thinking "Be careful what you wish for, as you just may get it" is a saying I've heard before and I think would be very applicable here. Unless of course you're hoping to see the inside of the ER multiple times a year for broken limbs and concussions etc. Martial arts are not going to teach him to dare without thinking (or at least they shouldn't). That said, they can improve self-confidence, do work on various motor skills, etc. A trial lesson wouldn't hurt - you would be able to see how things go, see if he likes it, etc. My youngest started in taekwondo when he was almost 3.5yo. I think the instructors matter more than the exact sport/martial art. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 I have a physically daring 4yo who has taught me to relax a bit, but that's because he's shown me that he does (usually) think and assess a situation. If he did not, I'd be a nervous wreck!!! I am, however, getting quite tired of having to "rescue" him from things he can easily climb up, but fears climbing down. Hoping this summer sees the end of THAT! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 Kiddie gym, swimming. And, yes, karate-- the classes ds took at that age were just perfect for teeny tinies. It is less intimidating for a kid who is more cautious than gymnastics is. 3 is also the perfect age to learn to swim. The water allows for a surprising amount of body awareness learning. After 3 unstoppably daring girls, I had a cautious boy. He was so cautious he couldn't stand for his sister's to leave his sight. He cried when THEY would walk across a log in the woods. He stayed cautious until he was 13 and started flying airplanes. Seems that didn't scare him one bit...Now, he does all sorts of stupid things that are daring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 I think three is too young to be thinkng about such a thing. Play at the playground and read good books. Let him be his own person. FWIW, I think people who do things without caution are some of the most dangerous people around. It isn't a trait to be fostered. Confidence in personal ability (and a realistic view of the same) and discernment about determining reasonable risk is a much better skill set, IMO. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piper Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 TBH, I wouldn't even worry about it. Kids are all different. There's no harm in his being cautious. My two are very different - my dd is cautious and totally not daring, while my ds does everything with a full body commitment. (Even now that she's 9, there are things that my ds has been doing for years that she's not entirely comfortable with.) It's just their personalities, and there's nothing wrong with either way of approaching life. Let him explore his own boundaries in his own time. He'll be fine! (And on a side note, being cautious is not necessarily a guarantee of safety! Contrary to all expectations, it's my dd who broke her arm, not my ds! :tongue_smilie: ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luuknam Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 (And on a side note, being cautious is not necessarily a guarantee of safety! Contrary to all expectations, it's my dd who broke her arm, not my ds! :tongue_smilie: ) Well, yeah. Sometimes bad luck just happens. I fell off a chair with a 10 or so inch high seat when I was 3 and broke my arm. But odds are that the majority of bad accidents happen to kids doing risky things. I think most 3yos wouldn't be able to break their arm falling 10 inches even if they tried to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 some kids are stronger than others.- but those who aren't as strong can be in sports to increase strength. personally - I think 3 is too young for most kids and he should be allowed to "just play". give him opportunities to climb things - that will build strength, and build self-confidence (which may be what your dh defines as daring.) some kids are more daring than other kids - (I have two . . . . ) you usually can't teach non-daring kids to be daring. (daring is NOT all it's cracked up to be! :toetap05: honestly, I think the only reason 2dd hasn't taken up rock climbing is she is a broke grad-student. personally - I think she'd "love it". and be a natural.) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 TBH, I wouldn't even worry about it. Kids are all different. There's no harm in his being cautious. My two are very different - my dd is cautious and totally not daring, while my ds does everything with a full body commitment. (Even now that she's 9, there are things that my ds has been doing for years that she's not entirely comfortable with.) It's just their personalities, and there's nothing wrong with either way of approaching life. Let him explore his own boundaries in his own time. He'll be fine! (And on a side note, being cautious is not necessarily a guarantee of safety! Contrary to all expectations, it's my dd who broke her arm, not my ds! :tongue_smilie: ) Agreeing, in my experience, it is the cautious ones who tend to get hurt more. The ones who go for it all the way usually succeed. The ones who hold back get hurt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted April 2, 2015 Share Posted April 2, 2015 Maybe he just needs a bit of time to find his way. My now ten year old son was super cautious as a little guy, very reluctant to try new things, barely leaving my side until he was about four, definitely not the daredevil that several of his siblings are. He was never one to climb as a toddler, never pushed the limits, never tested the rules. At 16 months, we took him camping. I said, one time, "The fire is hot; don't touch it." He never even tried to approach it. (Otoh, taking his now 19mo brother camping would mean I'd be chasing him away from the fire every three seconds, and his older sister would have assumed that I didn't really mean the fire was hot, that somehow it wouldn't burn her. Totally different children.) He just needed time. Bit by bit, he blossomed, and it's been awesome to watch his inner self emerge. At ten, he's still cautious, but it's more of a "watch and be reasonably careful and ask some questions" rather than "too scared so that its holding him back from fully enjoying life." Karate (hapkido, specifically) has been great for all of my older children. The daredevils benefit from focusing their energy, and my cautious son benefits by being encouraged to try new things. His caution leads to him being meticulous and detail oriented in his moves. His current 3yo brother is a little on the cautious side as well; our instructor will try children when they're four, so we will try little brother in a few months. I don't think it'll make him more daring, though; I think he is what he is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess5 Posted April 2, 2015 Author Share Posted April 2, 2015 I'm very curious about this also. I don't think I've ever heard that acting before thinking is a good trait to have. I'm interested in what this would look like for a three year old. I think it's not a bad thing but I tend to be more cautious and less daring like I'm scared to go on roller coasters etc.. And I feel I don't want my kids like that, which may limit their enjoyment of their lives fully. But I understand thinking and analyzing before acting is great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 Agreeing, in my experience, it is the cautious ones who tend to get hurt more. The ones who go for it all the way usually succeed. The ones who hold back get hurt. True in my experience also. Kids learn how to avoid collisions by having collisions (and near collisions). It is generally better to have them learn this when their bones are softer and their butts are closer to the ground. ;) My kids have done lots of daring things. The only times they have gotten hurt enough for a doc visit were times when they were doing really lame things. Usually walking on a flat floor. :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luuknam Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 Kids learn how to avoid collisions by having collisions (and near collisions). Please tell me when this lesson kicks in... my 7.5yo has plenty of experience having collisions, but hasn't learned to avoid them yet (except when crossing the street, when he's super worried about cars that are ten blocks away). My thought on daring without thinking is that an overly cautious kid is not going to fall 20ft down a tree, because they won't be up that tree to begin with. It's a balancing act, really. Too cautious is not good, because you don't learn what you can and can't do, but too daring puts you in situations you shouldn't be in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 nm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 nm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwik Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 Unless you think the child has below normal strength I would just make sure your life contains enough free time and outside time with plenty of visits to the park. Other than that I would try gym or dance but leave martial arts until 10 or so. But I do live in a place where there are no little kid classes and few kids classes. The adult classes I attended had the odd 5 to 7 year old and the obviously got less out of the instruction and were held to lower standards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tsuga Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 Three is very little to be concerned about this. Like many have said, some children are just cautious. I have one cautious but talented child and one kid who just doesn't stop. Think 10 mile hikes at age three, XC skiing uphill at age three and four. She's just a little dynamo. This is great for hiking, NOT so great for sitting in a classroom, but what to do. That said, I think karate's great. My daughter did it at three and did well. She learned how to hit and be hit, how to defend herself as a tiny person. We had a great dojo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenC Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 I'm not sure a 3yo needs to be physically challenged. I agree a lot of outdoor play is beneficial to any kid and I think gymnastics is a good basis for any sport he chooses to do later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 I would encourage age appropriate physical activity and let him be who he is. If he doesn't get a lot of exercise by his own choice, because he doesn't decide to do free play on the playground, I'd sign him up for preschool gym classes, swimming, rec center play programs. Add in some neighborhood walks, weekend hikes and GENTLE follow the leader challenges with mom you can help motor development appropriately. Be very careful not to compare and not let your ds hear or see you compare what he's doing to anyone past or present. I might investigate sensory issues, which also coexist with anxiety. I have a 2E ds. Rec level sports and gymnastics were a good supplement and sometimes inexpensive replacement for PT and OT. We waited on TKD until age 10. You have to judge that on the child. For my ds, he would not have stuck with TKD for more than a few months prior to age 8. He was ready for the challenge at 10 and stuck with it for three years when he was ready for something new of his choosing. My ds is more cautious about physical challenges. The good thing is I never worried about be the kid who did the really stupid daredevil thing that resulted in serious injury. I did step in and stop some other neighbor boys from time to time (afternoon rush hour is not the time begin helmet less "street luge" on skateboards). On the other side, raising that ds has probably been way more challenging than raising a more typical boy. I think it's most important to let your ds be who he is. Give him opportunities for challenge, but don't be pushy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 I have a super-cautious, SPD kid, and in many respects, I wish I'd put her into structured physical activities earlier (she didn't really start until she was 5-6 years old) because it's so hard for her to separate the "I have real need to be worried/scared" and "I've got this". Gymnastics really made a difference-but she also was fortunate in that when I called the gymnastics gym and explained the situation, they just happened to have a masters student in OT coaching-who was doing her thesis on using gymnastics as an inclusive form of OT, so was GLAD to add DD to her lab group. At 10, she's still cautious and slow to develop physical skills, but she's starting to be able to recognize that "I've got this" and be more willing to try something new-but it's still baby steps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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