Night Elf Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I am not sure people without anxiety understand just how awful it can be. I'm supposed to have lunch with my DH today. I have to drive to his work to pick him up. I'm so nervous that my stomach is twisted in knots. It's been years since I've been over there. I was under the influence of a sleeping pill when I came up with the idea last night. He's looking forward to it, so I can't change my mind. It just feels terrible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Awww. I have anxiety, too--sometimes it's so bad, I don't even feel it. It manifests in other ways. I'm sorry. I know no logical arguments will really help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Many hugs and much love. When you get there, will you be able to enjoy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 28, 2014 Author Share Posted February 28, 2014 One of the things that is bothering me is wondering if we're even going to find a seat at the restaurant. It's a really small, popular place. If we can sit down together to eat, I'll probably be fine. When I pick him up, I'm going to make him drive so I don't have to worry about going through traffic to find the restaurant. My doctor said it's good that I don't turn down things that make me uncomfortable because I could get afraid to leave the house. I don't ever want to be that bad. I do have anxiety pills that I save for emergencies. This might be a good time to take one. I didn't tell DH I am afraid, but I know he knows. We have a joke about my field trip anxiety. Ds has an outside homeschool class that has field trips. I only go if DH can take off work to go with me, and even then I'm anxious until we've been there a little while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Oh Honey, I totally get you. :grouphug: :grouphug: Please let us know how the lunch goes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarah1615 Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 No advice, but I totally understand. Anxiety is a horrible thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy in NH Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Try some mindfulness meditation. Studies show it works well to reduce anxiety. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: It will be okay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plink Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 ((Hugs)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :grouphug: Sending some warm thoughts your way, and hoping to hear that you had a great time later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Hugs. I don't know if it really helps or is "just in my mind" but a friend (who is a PA) told me to take 400-600mg of Ibuprofen ahead of time. I don't have much anxiety except when I was horseback riding on my new horse. I loved it but I was in knots. It did help. I don't know if it would generalize to other types of anxiety but with my anxiety over horseback riding I would take baby steps and then remind myself of each babystep or NEW thing I had done (and lived to tell about it :-)) Like, I got on my horse today without someone else holding him. I walked around the pasture without someone else leading him or walking next to me I walked around the yard outside of the fence .........on and on to things like I rode a new trail I rode out with a new horse we cantered down the trail We got passed on the road by a UPS truck and lived It might not help this time but maybe take babysteps that are uncomfortable and then write down what you did and then the next time push yourself just a tiny bit more and keep building on it. Again, not sure if it will help general anxiety but it sure has helped my horseback riding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in FL. Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I know exactly what you are talking about. One thing I have found helpful is some CDs by Claire Weeks called Pass Through Panic. I listen to them in my car when I am driving somewhere that I am anxious about. She has a very calming voice (Australian) and she just makes sense of the anxiety/panic that I feel in such a way that it takes the fear out of it for me. I hope your lunch goes well! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lil' maids in a row Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I am with you. Anxiety IS awful. Hope all goes well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie131 Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I get it. I totally get it. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halcyon Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I get it. Hugs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I get it, too. Unfortunately. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Laurie Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I also get it. I hope you're able to find a seat and sit with dh and enjoy your lunch. Hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 ((Hugs)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Does it help to have a backup plan? A second restaurant to go to if the first is too crowded? Or does that just add to the anxiety? :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggie96 Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Hugs. I don't know if it really helps or is "just in my mind" but a friend (who is a PA) told me to take 400-600mg of Ibuprofen ahead of time. I don't have much anxiety except when I was horseback riding on my new horse. I loved it but I was in knots. It did help. My daughter has major struggles with anxiety, and we have found that taking some Ibuprofen immediately before the event helps tremendously. For me, I will get a migraine immediately after a high stress period (which I handle fine during the moment). If I take Ibuprofen once a day (maybe twice) for a couple of days after the high stress situation is resolved, I can avoid the migraine, It took me 30 years to figure that out (only after I had a daughter that I was trying to help with anxiety). You WILL have a nice lunch with your husband. It WILL be OK. (((((hugs))))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mytwomonkeys Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Hugs to you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Does it help you to visualize the steps to get there. The route you take in the car, where you park, etc? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Let us know how it goes; I hope you have a nice lunch btw. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophiasapientia Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I totally get it. I'm actually in therapy right now to get help for anxiety/a driving phobia that I've had since my teenage years when I got my license. It is very challenging, to be sure, especially doing this in the midst of the worst winter we've had in over 60 years but I wish I had gotten help sooner. I didn't realize until I started the process that our health insurance would cover the entire expense & we haven't had to pay a dime out of pocket for my treatment. It might be worth checking into. [some other things, besides Cognitive Behavioral Therapy & Mindfulness Therapy -- both approaches my therapist uses with me-- that are helping: getting an updated eye glass prescription, working on improving my driving knowledge base & skill level with some help, the works of Claire Weekes & Joseph Clough, breath work and then practice, practice, practice. I'm a definite work in progress but I'm starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel and that my life can be different.] I hope that you have a nice lunch with your husband! Two of my goals are to be able to meet my husband for lunch at work (requires highway driving & is over 30 minutes away) and to be able to take my DD on outings/field trips that are out my "driving comfort zone" so I really understand. Hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :grouphug: I get it. and then, if you get past the anticipation anxiety - you can get lots of anxiety afterwards :toetap05: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Hugs, hugs, hugs. I understand. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 I'm sorry. In my household it is dh who struggles with anxiety, it really can be debilitating :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: I hope it helps to know that you're not alone and that so many people understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trulycrabby Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Hugs to you. I really, really know how you feel. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 28, 2014 Author Share Posted February 28, 2014 Update: I really appreciate the well wishes, and knowing so many here do understand. I feel like such a fool when I'm anxious because logically I know there is no problem. The lunch went well, better than I expected. I had to drive on a highway and I hate merging, but the road was empty so it was no stress. I got to DH's work with no problem and let him drive us to the restaurant. It wasn't crowded and in fact, DH said he's never seen it so empty at that time of day. We were able to find a booth next to the wall which helped me feel better. DH drove us back to his work. Thankfully, after another no stress drive on the high way, I had no problem getting back to my local area where I'm comfortable. So now I'm home and in my comfy clothes because i don't have to go back out again. I might even make cupcakes tonight! BTW, I have been diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and am under the care of a physician, but thanks for the ideas because I would wholeheartedly recommend that course to someone in my position. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 So glad you had a good time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Good for you! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 Hurray for a VIctory!!!!! So glad you had a nice date with your husband! Anne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PuddleJumper1 Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :hurray: Glad to hear you had a good time. I have anxiety creep up on my at some unexpected times. Not easy to deal with. Yea to you for going and having a good time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Outdoorsy Type Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 (((Hugs)))) from someone who has terrible anxiety in social situations or when doing anything at all new. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted February 28, 2014 Share Posted February 28, 2014 :grouphug: I strongly, strongly recommend that you look in to EFT (tapping). Actually, if you go to tappingworldsummit.com, which is a free event going on right now, tonight's presentations are on releasing Anxiety and Anger. You can sign up, then watch the quick beginner's video to learn about the tapping points so at 8 EST (and for 24 hours after) you can listen and learn the audio presentation interviews. I cannot stress strongly enough how much I recommend EFT. It's is what I will be known for on this board (thinking about the thread about Bill's well-known opinions). :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 1, 2014 Share Posted March 1, 2014 :hurray: Glad you had fun and thanks for sharing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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