How long does this perimenopause thing last, anyway?

[Dmmetler]

For the last several years, I've had 1-2 cycles a year. At the worst possible time.

This one is no exception. I'm finally in NYC, for just a few days. I've got a huge list of things I want to do...

 

And it shows up for the first time since November.

 

Ugh.... 

 

 

[Kassia]

I'm sorry!  That is miserable.  A friend of mine is going through something similar.  She's 54 and keeps thinking she's done and...then another period and she has to start all over again.  So frustrating!  Hope you're not feeling too awful and it's not terribly inconvenient.  😞 

[Longtime Lurker]

My cycles went from normal to gone (yay!) over the course of a single year but the hot flashes just go on and on and on...

[EKS]

My cycles got more and more disrupted over the course of about eight years, with the last maybe three of those years being totally wonky in the way you're describing.

And agreeing with @Longtime Lurker about the hot flashes.  Ugh.

[Longtime Lurker]

7 minutes ago, EKS said:

My cycles got more and more disrupted over the course of about eight years, with the last maybe three of those years being totally wonky in the way you're describing.

And agreeing with @Longtime Lurker about the hot flashes.  Ugh.

I always dress in layers now and I have gotten so that I take layers on and off without even really noticing most of the time. So I guess I have adjusted to this new normal.

[Shelydon]

For.ev.er. and ev.er. Sigh

[almondbutterandjelly]

When I turned 50, my doctor had me go off the pill and then after a couple weeks, had me do bloodwork.  Her office told me that I was  post-menopausal.  Since then and pill-free, I've had three cycles at very regular intervals.  Post-menopausal my a**.  I'm a bit bitter.  I'm more regular now than in my entire life.  

[kbutton]

I’m about ten years in and not quite done. I also have more cycles in the summer, which suggests I’m part chicken or something. I’m early but so was one of my grandmothers. I am not officially diagnosed, but it’s quite likely that I have PCOS that flew under the radar until ten years ago—I have high testosterone. If so, that might be complicating my exit from the crazy.

DIM helps a great deal with hot flashes and supposedly helps metabolize hormones in a less problematic way. My women’s health nurse practitioner leans toward functional med, and she put me on it. I take Thorne’s brand.

[kbutton]

4 minutes ago, perky said:

When I turned 50, my doctor had me go off the pill and then after a couple weeks, had me do bloodwork.  Her office told me that I was  post-menopausal.  Since then and pill-free, I've had three cycles at very regular intervals.  Post-menopausal my a**.  I'm a bit bitter.  I'm more regular now than in my entire life.  

I have levels of one progesterone at what would be considered a post-menopausal level, but things are still going. I think that’s an inappropriate application of hormone level information. My NP just uses it as a guide for treating symptoms and trying to keep excess unbalanced hormones from doing damage being unopposed (my estrogen is high, so high e with low p can cause problems).

[MEmama]

5 minutes ago, perky said:

had me do bloodwork.  Her office told me that I was  post-menopausal.

I don't think bloodwork is helpful, tbh. I begged for hormone testing because I have ALL the perimenopause symptoms (though I've had a hysterectomy, so blissfully not the random bleeding out issues) and they came out totally "normal". I call BS. I'm 51 and a raging, sobbing lunatic, there's no way the tests are right. I'll never convince my doctor though.

In my case I don't know what I'd do about it anyway; I don't want to take hormones,  I just want to know what stage of this hell I'm currently in since I have no physical way of knowing.

[wintermom]

I think timing-wise, a lot of it is genetics. So if you know when your mom finished, it would give you a rough timeline.

I was fairly similar to my mom's recalled timing. As this plague lingers on and on, I can completely understand her not having a specific age to remember.

You could get a blood test done to find out if you are done. I don't know how accurate it is, but it may help your sanity. Maybe. 

 

[SKL]

It varies a lot.  I think mine took about 4 years between getting irregular and finally stopping.  I have a friend, 6 years older than me, who had started perimenopause before me, and then had another period like a year after I stopped.  She was so mad.  😛

I still wear a cloth pad pretty much all the time, just out of habit.  My last period was in 2019 IIRC.

Edited August 16, 2023 by SKL

[Doodlebug]

Knowing when your mom finished up would be really good info, if that's available to you.  

But I would actually discourage bloodwork - just from the perspective of managing your expectations.  If your FSH is elevated, bloodwork just confirms what you already know -  that you are heading toward menopause.  But even that isn't a guarantee - FSH and estradiol can fluctuate wildly during peri and a hormone panel is just a snapshot of what's going on at that specific point in time.  It isn't helpful beyond a general affirmation that yep... meno is on the way.  The next month, things could look very different.  

Big frustrating sympathies.  

If you're faithful with your annual exam, I'd say you're doing the most you can do.  One concern is that you may be experiencing breakthrough bleeding, not an actual ovulatory period.  If that's the case, the estrogen your ovaries are able to produce builds up lining in the uterus across months which eventually cannot sustain itself and sluffs off - inefficiently.  As long as you are getting regular pap smears to check for hyperplasia, you're likely fine.    

Edited August 16, 2023 by Doodlebug

[prairiewindmomma]

When I read your post, the phrase “forever and ever and ever” from “You’ll be Back” from Hamilton began to play in my mind. You have my empathy and commiseration.

[dsmith]

I had 4 years of not having cycles during the summer. It was awesome!!! Then the last summer before actual menopause it hit while I was on vacation, along with a terrible cold. But that was my last period. I had hot flashes during that whole time, and for about 18 months after my last period. 

My mother just stopped. No wacky cycles, hot flashes, etc. It was just over one day. I hoped I would be like her! I was also 8 years earlier than her. I was very early. I did get bloodwork to confirm it. I absolutely love being post-menopausal!! 

[Faith-manor]

F.o.r.f.r.e.a.k.i.n.g.e.v.e.r.

Says the woman 55 years old and still get two or three periods per year. Knock on wood it has been 7 months since the last one, and probably just saying that jinxed it!

😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😈😠😈😈😠😈😠😈😠😈👹💀💀💀😱

[lewelma]

My mom was 60. My grandmother at 60 gave up and had a hysterectomy. My aunt on the other side got pregnant at 55 (and miscarried at 4 months).  So I've got a long way to go. I've been in perimenopause for 10 years and my periods are reasonably regular at 53. I need a new IUD, and just can't face it, but also can't face getting pregnant at 55. gulp. 

[rebcoola]

I've been following a womens health teacher from the UK who focuses on Peri and its upto 15 years 😭 

I have no idea when it might end because my mom had an hysterectomy.

[regentrude]

I read that perimenopause can last up to 13 years.

 

[Laura Corin]

Fwiw I kept my Mirena until 55. I had tested post menopausal at 52. I didn't have more than a bit of spotting after it was removed. Eta I had no periods when using the Mirena.

Edited August 16, 2023 by Laura Corin

[KatieJ]

[Faith-manor]

1 minute ago, KatieJ said:

Accurate! 

[Drama Llama]

1 hour ago, regentrude said:

I read that perimenopause can last up to 13 years.

 

[kbutton]

3 hours ago, rebcoola said:

I've been following a womens health teacher from the UK who focuses on Peri and its upto 15 years 😭 

I have no idea when it might end because my mom had an hysterectomy.

1 hour ago, regentrude said:

I read that perimenopause can last up to 13 years.

No!!! All the websites used to say ten years at most. 3-5 more years of this is insanity.

[kbutton]

Just now, kbutton said:

No!!! All the websites used to say ten years at most. 3-5 more years of this is insanity.

Of course, I say this, but I was one of those people that dragged out puberty too—neither late nor early but really took my time tagging all the bases. Maybe we end as we start, lol!

[SKL]

Oh and joy of joys, just because the periods stop doesn't mean the hot flashes do....

[kbutton]

4 minutes ago, SKL said:

Oh and joy of joys, just because the periods stop doesn't mean the hot flashes do....

I’m still bleeding irregularly, but my worst hot flashes were early on. Now I’m mostly just hot with the lingering possibility of a mild panic attack from getting too hot on top of that, but still not exactly a hot flash. It’s all a crap sandwich, lol!

[SKL]

3 minutes ago, kbutton said:

I’m still bleeding irregularly, but my worst hot flashes were early on. Now I’m mostly just hot with the lingering possibility of a mild panic attack from getting too hot on top of that, but still not exactly a hot flash. It’s all a crap sandwich, lol!

Yeah mine aren't as bad either, but actually feeling comfortable seems to be a thing of the past.

[kbutton]

1 minute ago, SKL said:

Yeah mine aren't as bad either, but actually feeling comfortable seems to be a thing of the past.

Well said!

[Pawz4me]

38 minutes ago, kbutton said:

Now I’m mostly just hot with the lingering possibility of a mild panic attack from getting too hot on top of that, but still not exactly a hot flash.

 

35 minutes ago, SKL said:

Yeah mine aren't as bad either, but actually feeling comfortable seems to be a thing of the past.

I relate to both of these statements.

I miss being cold. Those days were so nice. Cold may be uncomfortable, but at least it's a clean kind of uncomfortable. Hot is a sticky, nasty kind of uncomfortable. 

[Happy Camper]

I really shouldn't have read this thread! Ugh, what is this madness?!? I didn't realize hot flashes lasted after periods stopped. Apparently I've got a long way to go. 😭

[Annie G]

Way too long. About 6 years for me. Periods got much lighter and farther apart. And then BAM they suddenly were SUPER heavy, like leaking through super tampon AND super pad in minutes. Then for the rest of that period it was normal. But I never knew when the gushing was going to happen.  It was awful, but especially after seeing them be so light for a year. 
There was a year or more where I was super irregular. Might be 15 days between periods, or 34, or 90. No predictability at all. 
 I went 364 days without a period and then got one on day 365 and I was NOT a fun person to be around that day. Man, was I mad that I had to reset my clock. Never had another one. 
 

I believe dh was truly as happy as I was when menopause finally was achieved. 

[Pam in CT]

My periods were regular until age ~57 and then just stopped. That was that.

Hot flashes otoh started age ~55 and show NO SIGN of slowing down at 60, still cycling ~4-6 times every hour, 24/7.  By this point my base layer 12 months a year is a sleeveless tank with built in shelf bra, which I have in every color, and I just pile a range of cardigans / blazers / hoodies on top with a range of scarves / shawls / wraps to accessorize and/or serve as an additional layer.

 

 

ETA and my mother had exactly one hot flash in all her life, and was done with periods by 50. So her experience has given very little guidance to mine, sigh.

Edited August 17, 2023 by Pam in CT

[J-rap]

My periods became less frequent and then just stopped, all in a period of about a year.  Hot flashes remained for a few years but never bothered me much.  They were pretty mild.

[Kidlit]

Forty-nine here and no real discernible symptoms that I can tell (though I have gained weight and have unfortunate aches and pains that have shown up in the last couple of years.). Y'all are scaring me. 

[Laura Corin]

4 hours ago, Kidlit said:

Forty-nine here and no real discernible symptoms that I can tell (though I have gained weight and have unfortunate aches and pains that have shown up in the last couple of years.). Y'all are scaring me. 

Not everyone gets bad symptoms. l had limited hot flushes and also vaginal dryness - I have a prescription for the latter. I was lucky.

[KidsHappen]

My mother and I were both done by about 50. I don't know about her but I had several years of perimenopause. Since menopause I have had three episodes of postmenopausal bleeding that required U/Ss, biopsies and treatment. My dd just turned 37 and her periods are already getting wacky. If she sticks to the same time period as me and my mom then that will be 13 years of perimenopause. 

[Carrie12345]

20 hours ago, kbutton said:

I also have more cycles in the summer, which suggests I’m part chicken or something.

That is the best thing I’ve ever read on this miserable topic! 😆

[Matryoshka]

18 hours ago, Faith-manor said:

F.o.r.f.r.e.a.k.i.n.g.e.v.e.r.

Says the woman 55 years old and still get two or three periods per year. Knock on wood it has been 7 months since the last one, and probably just saying that jinxed it!

😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😈😠😈😈😠😈😠😈😠😈👹💀💀💀😱

Last one I had was at 56.5yo. That's been almost two years, so knock wood I'm finally done!

[kbutton]

This seems relevant in this thread.