Night Elf Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) I've been out of church since 2005 when we moved 45 minutes away. I was very involved in that church and I loved it there. Then we moved and I tried a new church and it didn't have the same feeling as my former church so I didn't go back. I also didn't try anymore churches. So I haven't stepped foot in a church in 14 years. I've been thinking about returning to church for months now but I'm so scared to go on my own. My DH isn't religious and has no desire to support me in this by going with me, but he does want me to be happy and understands God has a place in my Heart and in my Life despite my lack of religious activity in the past 14 years. So over the course of the past couple of months, I've felt like God wants me to go try that church again. He's telling me that's the next step in my Life. He answered my prayers to find something personally fulfilling and that was all my volunteering which led to a paying job. I work with good people and love my job. I'm grateful that God steered me in that direction, even despite my lack of daily prayer. Anyway, I'm going to church in the morning. DH helped me find my Bible and I dusted it off. I love my Bible. It's in a lovely leather case with an embroidered cross on the front. I have a pen in there to take notes. I want to be a part of a Sunday School class for women only and do Bible study and make friends. I also want to attend a traditional worship service and listen to the sermon and learn more about the Bible and God's message to me. But I'm nervous. I bet I won't be able to sleep tonight. I decided that for my first visit, I'm only going to go to the worship service at 11:00 am. If it goes well, then next Sunday I'll go to a Sunday School class at 9:30 am. I really wish I had someone going with me. I don't normally do things on my own because I suffer from anxiety. So I'd be grateful if you ask God to help me feel not alone tomorrow. Let me meet nice people who make me feel welcome. Thank you. UPDATE: I forgot what a good ole Southern Baptist Church is like. I really enjoyed myself. They played maybe a bit too much music. The service started with about 20-30 minutes of singing both by the congregation and the choir. They had a full band. And that was the Traditional Worship service. The earlier service is the Contemporary one that has a Praise Team and Band. I imagine that's more geared towards younger members like college age and young adults, although there was a mixture of ages in the Traditional Service. Dumb me forgot to bring in my glasses so I couldn't fill out the 'I'm New Here' card to drop in the offering plate. I had to go up to the help desk after service to get someone to help me write on it. I enjoyed myself enough to want to join a Sunday School class which they call Connect groups. Everyone that talked to me was extremely nice and welcoming. I got a hug and a personal prayer from one guy who is in charge of getting people connected in the church. I explained I hadn't been to church in 14 years and he thanked God that He led me back to church. So I'd say it was an extremely positive experience and I believe I'll feel at home at this church as much as I did the last church I belonged to before we moved to our present location. So thank you for all the prayers. They really worked. I wasn't anxious at all. I got dressed and DH helped me pick out the right outfit and shoes, then I drove myself there and parked. All the while I felt calm. As I got to the building, three men in red church jackets met me and welcomed me. One took me by the hand and let me inside to the help desk. He personally introduced me to the woman behind the desk. It felt so good that I wasn't alone. So thank you again!! Whoa! Giant smiley face. I was going to delete it but I don't know how! Oh well, I feel happy so why not a big happy? Edited February 24, 2019 by Night Elf Adding update 36 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Aw, Beth, I will pray for you. For courage to move forward, and comfort as you do so. And at least one person to befriend you! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I’ll be happy to pray for you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
displace Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Praying for you to have a great experience and feel awesome and at peace there! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aaplank Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I applaud your courage. I will be praying for you through the night and tomorrow. Let us know how it goes. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaz Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Thanks for sharing. Your story touched my heart. I'm praying you can sleep tonight and that the Lord is with you tomorrow. May you make a new friend! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I'm praying for you too. When I have read your posts over the past year or so, the courage you have shown in tackling things that were intimidating and hard for you has been inspiring. May you rest peacefully tonight, and go tomorrow with God giving you courage and leading you to the right pew, people, etc., that you need to help you break through that barrier of newness. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 If I was close I would go with you. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 You are a brave person!!! I have anxiety too. Last year I worked up the courage to volunteer at my local food pantry because of the things you shared about when you started volunteering at what became your job. Thanks for that! I went back to church after a long break due to panic attacks. It was hard at first but it gets better each time I go. You sound like you're going into this with a good plan and with an understanding that it could be hard. (hugs) 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmandaVT Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I wish I were closer so I could come and sit with you! I'll be praying for you in the morning and hoping it all goes well! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desertflower Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I hope you find a church with like minded Christian's. Will say a prayer for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Praying for you! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junie Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Praying that you will feel comfortable and that you will meet some wonderful people tomorrow. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) Praying for you! I'm another who wishes they could go with you. ♥️I know this takes courage, especially when you have anxiety, but you've got this and God will be right there with you! Looking forward to hearing how it goes. Edited February 24, 2019 by MercyA 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
readinmom Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Praying for you! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I'm praying for you too! Also, I think it's great that your dh is supportive of it even though he doesn't want to go himself. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 (edited) I am praying for you, Beth. I have some anxiety and some other similar challenges--you have been an inspiring person to me and I am grateful for your courageous example. And I'm in the Holy Land, so my prayers count twice as much. TOTALLY KIDDING Seriously, God be with you. ETA oh dear, I didn't realize the giant emojis were still a thing! lol Edited February 24, 2019 by Chris in VA 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Good for you, Beth! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Sending prayers........ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 24, 2019 Author Share Posted February 24, 2019 8 hours ago, happi duck said: You are a brave person!!! I have anxiety too. Last year I worked up the courage to volunteer at my local food pantry because of the things you shared about when you started volunteering at what became your job. Thanks for that! I went back to church after a long break due to panic attacks. It was hard at first but it gets better each time I go. You sound like you're going into this with a good plan and with an understanding that it could be hard. (hugs) Wow, thanks! I'm so glad you worked up the courage and that I may have played a small part in that. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 24, 2019 Author Share Posted February 24, 2019 I appreciate all the prayers. I got a good night's rest with peaceful dreams. I have been having some strange dreams lately. I'm glad last night was restful. I'll post back when I get home from church and let you all know how it went. It's only 7:00 am here so now I have to spend the next 4 hours in anticipation! 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizzie in Ma Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I have been going to church alone for awhile now. I had to leave the church dh still goes to, long story, but it is a place that's environment became toxic for me. I didn't go for several years until dh was invited to play at this new one and I went with him and fell in love with the sheer absolute presence of God there. It is a church for broken people, people who have been hurt by church, addicts, people I feel Jesus probably would have hung out with. In time I hope dh will join me but it isn't easy for him as he is worship leader at the old one. Not a fan of doing things on my own, but best decision I made in years. I hope you are blessed this morning and I look forward to hearing how it went. ❤️ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I’ll be praying this morning. You will do this, just like you’ve tackled so many other hard things in the last few years. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I hope you have a lovely time at church today. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Beth, I’m saying a prayer for you right now. One day a couple years ago I was trying something new and was anxious. My then 4 year old gave me a big hug and sang a little song based on a verse in Samuel to me. “Be strong and courageous and do not be a afraid for the Lord God is with each and everyday day.” If you start to get nervous remember God is with you and the Hive is praying for you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Praying for you! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 And as someone who's husband is not religious either, I get it. But you will see you are not alone in that situation, by a long shot. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 24, 2019 Author Share Posted February 24, 2019 Bumping up so my prayer warriors can see my update. Sorry for the big smiley face. I had no idea there was a problem or I wouldn't have done that! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 That is a great update. Glad you found somewhere you feel comfortable and welcomed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Beth, I am so happy to read your update! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freesia Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Wonderful! As a fellow anxiety sufferer, I know how hard that was. I am so proud of you. You did it! You are so strong and honest and caring. That new church will be blessed to have you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kidlit Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Wonderful update! It’s so great to be a part of the family of God! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Crying happy tears for you because I’m like that. I’m so glad you went and had a great morning. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Thrilled to read you update! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I'm so glad you had a wonderful experience! 🙂 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 That’s a fantastic update, I’m proud of you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 You go, girl! You're a rock star! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmandaVT Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I'm so happy it went well for you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 I don't see the update?? From the responses, I gather it went well! So happy for you, Beth. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 32 minutes ago, MercyA said: I don't see the update?? From the responses, I gather it went well! So happy for you, Beth. 🙂 It's in the OP. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaz Posted February 25, 2019 Share Posted February 25, 2019 I was hoping for a good report. Great news! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted February 25, 2019 Share Posted February 25, 2019 Thanks, @Rosie_0801! I could have sworn I checked the OP and it wasn't there. Maybe I needed to refresh. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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