Drive time for extracurriculars

[snickerplum]

We're moving to get closer to dh's office and dd11's dance studio (right now 40/45 minutes and 1 hour+ away respectively).

Our house hasn't sold yet (prayers appreciated!!) but we have found a few possibilities for a new house. One is perfect - great layout, plenty of space, quite private on a little over an acre. However, it's still a 30 minute drive to the dance studio and around the same for dh's office. [emoji53] We were hoping for about 20 minutes to each.

We drive to dance 3 times a week right now. I love the house, but don't want to end up regretting a longer drive (even though it would be shorter than what we have now).

How long of a drive time do you have for activities and what would be your ideal time?

 

 

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[Guest]

Mondays I drive 30 minutes to and from piano.

Fridays, I drive 30 minutes to and from violin or 45 minutes to and from harp.

Thursdays, I drive 40 minutes to gymnastics.

Tues, Wed, and Thurs, I drive 60 minutes to get to my school.

 

I think going from 45 minutes and 1 hour to 30 minutes will be really nice....and honestly, you wouldn't know what a 20 minute commute would be like because you don't have it.  But you will appreciate a 30 minute commute.

[Alessandra]

Thirty minutes is nothing for going to the right place, imo. We are in the suburbs, many activities, but for specialized things you just do the drive.

 

And as kids get older they may be able to take public transportation, if there is any in your area. It's not like when they are little and one toddler group is much like another.

[regentrude]

30 minutes would be fine. 

My DS drives two hours one way for judo twice a week. At least now he drives himself; it was a pain when we had to.

Edited August 13, 2017 by regentrude

[Plagefille]

I would love to only have a five minute drive, but that's not realistic. Our drive times are mostly 10-15 minutes. Track/cross country is 20 minutes away. I wish it was less, but it is worth it for a better group. We used to live in a big metro area where everything was at least 20 minutes. We moved to a smaller area so we could have better commute times.

[amy g.]

I was 45 minutes or an hour from activities at my old house in Texas. Now I'm 10 minutes away from the kids activities and I've decided that my next house will be walking distance. Time will tell if I get my way on that one.

 

I could do 30 minutes. I did twice that for years. I just really do not prefer to have to spend that much of my time in the car.

[Julie Smith]

Zero drive time, as in we walk to: 
Running Club
West Coast Swing and Tap Class (for me)

Piano (Boys now walk to lessons without me. When I did take them it was a 5 minute or so walk and I would wait with one boy, while the other had the lesson. When I was waiting I got to snuggle kittens. :))

In the past we use to also walk to: Swimming, Skating, and Library events

 

Dh bikes to Japanese class. If the weather is bad he might drive, but due to the fact biking is a direct route I think both trips is less than 10 minutes. I'm not sure, since I have only had to do the drive once or twice to pick him up or drop him off. 

 

My boys due go indoor rock climbing once or twice a month. It is a drop in event, so not tied down for it. It's the longest I drive to anything. I think it is 8 minute drive. Till they took this up I would sometimes go a month or more without driving. 

Edited August 14, 2017 by Julie Smith

[SquirrellyMama]

We're 5 minutes from our activities. Ten minutes if we walk. Love it!

 

We've driven 35 minutes before. I would do it again if that was our only option.

 

Kelly

[edelweiss]

My DD's dance studio is 5 minutes away, but we are leaving it for one that is 35-40 minutes away. So, I will be driving there and back (perhaps twice a day) 6 days a week. It isn't ideal, but it is worth it for better training.

[SKL]

Let's see, this school year we will probably do the following for extracurriculars, spread over all 7 days:

• Gymnastics, 2 days, 30 minutes each way.
• Math tutoring, 2 days, 30 minutes each way.
• School sports and youth group, means I have to pick up from school (instead of them taking the bus), 30 minute round trip x 2-3 days + games.
• TKD:  1-2 days, 25 minutes each way.
• Horse riding:  30 minutes round trip.
• Library activities:  2-3 days, 45 minutes per day.
• Scouts:  every other Thursday, 45 minutes each way, plus special events.
• Sunday School & church:  30 minutes round trip.

So total, per week, about 600 minutes or 10 hours?  Can that be right?  Yikes!

 

ETA some of them won't overlap, i.e., we probably won't do as much TKD when we have school sports ....  But still, probably at least 7-8 hours per week, I think.

 

Edited August 14, 2017 by SKL

[Bluegoat]

I'm now in a place where I am very hesitant to commit long term to anything that is much of a drive.  I try and stay under 20 min, and I prefer closer.  Most of our activities are a 10 min drive at the moment.  We also have some in walking distance, which is entirely wonderful.

 

I've considered moving further out for a bigger house, but I don't think it would be worth it.

[sassenach]

Our drive time for everything is 15-20 min. This is so regional. Around here, people get pretty complainy if anything is more than a 5 or 10 min drive. In LA, 30 was a totally acceptable standard.

 

In your case, I just wonder if it's really worth the time and expense of moving just to gain 30 min on an extracurricular (what if she gives up dance in a few years?).

 

I would want more of a gain on Dh's commute, personally.

[Dmmetler]

Cheer is 30 minutes if traffic is good, longer if it's bad. DD is there at least 3x/week, often four.

[Pronghorn]

Most of our drive times are 30 plus minutes. We usually listen to a lecture from The Great Courses on the way to keep the learning going.

[Pronghorn]

Most of our drive times are 30 plus minutes. We usually listen to a lecture from The Great Courses on the way to keep the learning going.

[KungFuPanda]

The longest we've driven for a weekly activity is 20 minutes. Most of what we do is 5-10 minutes away. I LOVE this. It's a huge quality of life perk for us. I don't think I'd bother moving just to save ten minutes. I would move to get down to a 10 minute commute, but 30-45 minutes falls into that less-than-an-hour-but-still-annoyingly-long window for me. If I was moving to cut my commute I'd avoid getting distracted by houses outside the acceptable radius. I'd even consider month-to-month rental while waiting for a better and closer house.

 

Eta: I would prioritize DH's commute over an extracurricular. We LIVED at the dance studio for years, then one year DD decided to go to high school and go all in with choir and musical theatre at her high school. We lived close enough for her to walk. This was a huge benefit since my homeschooled DS's activities weren't effected by his sister's school and rehearsal schedules. Also, I blinked and she's in college, so living near the studio would be a long-term benefit in our lives.

Edited August 14, 2017 by KungFuPanda

[Julie Smith]

Whenever I was looking for a house, I would draw a circle on the map, and only look at houses within the circle.

[catz]

Location location location!

 

We rarely drive more than 15-20 minutes for any regular ongoing activities.  We've done a few short term activities up to 30 minutes away.  Even those tend to be more due to traffic.  Like it might be 30 minutes or so during traffic one way, and then more like 20 after rush hour. 

[MistyMountain]

All the extra curricular activities will be within 15 minutes.

[3 ladybugs]

5 minutes to swim (once a week unless we miss a week then it is twice a week). 45 minutes to German (once a week). Church 30 minutes (once a week unless there is a something else going on). DH's commute is 90 minutes. 

 

All times are each way. 

 

Ideally we would be 5 minutes from everything. But I don't live in an ideal world. DH likes his commute. He listens to history podcasts. Church and German are both worth what we have to drive or we wouldn't do it. 

[Wheres Toto]

I live in a very densely populated state so there are a ton of options for every extracurricular you could imagine.   Most of what we do now is within 15 minutes.  We're 15 minutes from TKD, 10 minutes from our Y, less than 5 minutes from church and the lake where dd does swim team.   They are only that long because it's all back roads and we occasionally get caught behind school buses.

 

The main factor that affects drive time around here is traffic.  When Dh and I got married and I moved in with him, oldest dd was dancing at a studio near my old house (which was near where I lived with her dad).  She had been there for years so we didn't want to make her change studios.  A few years later, her studio closed and one of her old teachers and many of her friends went to a new studio, so we went there as well.  That was a 45-60 minute drive during rush hour, sometimes more if there was any weather or accidents.  I hated it because I used to have to drag the younger kids along for the ride and they would always fall asleep in the car.   A nap at 5pm doesn't lead to good sleep at night.   Going back to pick her up at 9/9:30 was usually about 25 minutes.

 

Dh's commute is about 10 minutes, he's less than 5 miles from home.  When I was working I was also only about 5 miles away.

 

[Amy in NH]

One-way travel times:

 

Dance 5 days 30 minutes

Piano 1 day 20 minutes

Harp 1 day every other week 40 minutes

Rock climbing 1-2 days indoor 15 minutes/outdoor 45 minutes

 

My school (occasionally) 1 hour

volunteer advocacy work once per month 1.5 hours

[Tess in the Burbs]

Ideal would be 15 min.

 

Piano 10min

Violin 20min

Scouts 45min

Dh commute 1+ hr

 

We are in big debate about moving closer to dh's work. Kids would need to change music teachers. Im tired of driving all the time

[HS Mom in NC]

Enrichment school T/TH 25-30 min. each way.

Tae Kwon Do M/W 20 min. each way.
Mathnasium M/T/TH 10 minutes from my house each way, but 15-20 min. from Enrichment school.

Ideal time?  5 min. but I'm content with drive time as is.

[displace]

I dislike driving more than 20 min one way. And we always use the time we'll, with educational podcasts, audiobooks, etc.

 

A 30 min commute, depending on your city and population changes over time, could easily increase.

 

Since your house hasn't sold yet, I'd consider searching more at a closer commute neighborhood.

[Sarah CB]

I think if you're moving to get closer then work on getting as close as you can. 

 

I used to have long extracurricular commutes. Music was one hour away and we went two times a week. It was worth it and I scheduled things well. On Mondays, we had private lessons and all the kids' group lessons. Then we went in a second day for ds' second lesson. Everything else we did was at least 20 minutes away.

 

Then we moved and put the kids in school, which meant that in addition to driving to extracurriculars, I was also doing drop off and pick-up each day. We were approximately 15 minutes from the school and most other activities, but because I was doing so much back and forth it was awful. I spent way too much time in the car.

 

So, we moved. Now we are about a six minute drive to school - or the kids can walk it in half an hour. Our activities are all about a six or seven minute drive as well. I like that if I'm stuck somewhere or if the weather is nice, my kids can walk half an hour home from most things. I also like being close enough to activities that I can drop off and go home for 45 minutes and then go back and pick them up. Huge difference. 

 

I would get as close as possible to your dh's office and your dd's dance. Especially if you see dance hours increasing. 

[kroe1]

If you have chatty kids, then the drive time can be quite nice. Dance may ultimately take over every night of the week. The drive time can replace the evening meal as a time of discussion and sharing.

 

In addition, the type of car one has can make the drive quite pleasant. A 34 speaker Bose panorama, for example, can be be close to heaven, LOL.

 

Furthermore, will the drive be through rolling countrysides and fast roads or heavy traffic dragging along? What I am driving through can be a real deal killer for me.

 

Another thought, dance may take over so much of the family life, that the house really doesn't matter. For that reason alone, it might be worth getting really close to several dance studios.

 

Finally, one day your child will be learning to drive. So at least pick a route to the studio easy for a teen driver.

[TravelingChris]

We tried to keep things within about 20 minutes. In DC area, it was a bit longer based on traffic and activities, but even there, DH only had a 25 minute commute and our primary extracurricular was 5-10 minutes away depending on traffic.

 

Not only is it better to have shorter commutes with time but also with gas usage too. I know gas prices are low now but they were much higher in recent past.

[MyLife]

This list is going to depress me as the reality of how much time we spend in the car sets in.

 

TKD 2x per week 20 minutes each way

Soccer 2x per week 30 minutes each way

Church 3x per week 30 minutes each way

Tutorial 1x per week 35 minutes each way

 

We even cut back this year by dropping a second tutorial day and scouts.

 

30 minutes is about the max I would drive for activities, unless my children were insanely passionate about an activity or unbelievably talented in something.

[LuvToRead]

My ideal would be 0.  I would love to be able to walk somewhere.  Our range is 15 minutes to 45 minutes.  Most of our activities are about a 20 minute drive.  

[Bluegoat]

I agree with a few people who said they would probably put more emphasis on the work commute assuming the location is stable... We chose the house we are in now largely because it is a short, simple bus ride to dh's work.  In a pinch he can walk or bike.  It makes a huge difference to our quality of life and it means we can get along with only one, or maybe even no, car.

[lmrich]

BUT if the point of moving was to be close to stuff - keep looking. How close can you get to both? 

[mommyoffive]

BUT if the point of moving was to be close to stuff - keep looking. How close can you get to both? 

 

Agree with this.  Is that the reason you are moving?  I would try and get as close as possible to both. 

 

Dance may end up going to everyday. 

 

 

We used to have everything that was at most a 3 min drive or you could walk or bike ride.  Swim, Violin, Tae Kwon Do, tennis, track, scouting, gymnastics, soccer, ................

 

The only thing that is now a 15 min drive each way is dance.  We switched studios to a MUCH better one.   

Edited August 14, 2017 by mommyoffive

[luvbug in Ohio]

My drive times are way too long, but idk what to do about it. Everything is just far away and we live out in the country-which we love and have no desire to move from. I keep telling myself that this is only for a season, but it's still depressing. I also happen to strongly dislike driving, so... yeah.

 

Pro-force training 2x week 60 min     Co-op 2x week 40 min     Basketball 3x week 50 min    Church 1x week 50 min     Errands (nearest grocery store, etc. 25 min)

Story time 1x week 20 min

 

It's at least 25 min to anything, so if something else comes up, guess what? More driving!

Those above times are all one way, btw.  I don't even want to add it all up and see how much of my life is spent behind the wheel. UGH. And some of these things are only for an hour, so I end up staying rather than driving home, so it's like I'm losing 3 hours of my day, just driving and waiting. It's no wonder I feel like I can't keep up with stuff at home sometimes. I just keep praying that God will grant me the strength, stamina and safety for all of this. Not to mention the gas money, lol.

 

*Edited to add 2 things i forgot*

T-ball 2x week 25 min

Swim team 5 x week 25 min

 

Edited August 14, 2017 by luvbug in Ohio

[catz]

BUT if the point of moving was to be close to stuff - keep looking. How close can you get to both? 

 

:iagree: We played this game too when buying our house and it's frustrating.  If it's not the location you want though, WAIT.  Keep looking.  It's so worth it to have easy commutes to the places you go all the time.

 

Our dance studio is less than 2 miles from our house.  So nice!

Edited August 14, 2017 by WoolySocks

[MysteryJen]

We moved to be closer to dh's work. That ended up being great as he bikes nearly every day and so there is an extra car available for when college kids come in and out of the house. Activities (as they do eventually come to an end) remained the nearly the same distance, except for one.

 

Judo increased from a 10 minute bike ride for ds2 to 40 min each way, 3x a week. He is a senior this year, so last year of doing this.

Swimming stayed nearly the same (5 min improvement-but nicer drive) 25 min each way, 10x a week

Guitar stayed same 25 minutes each way, 1x a week.

 

The absolute best thing was dh's commute. He is much, much happier with his bike ride and in bad weather, 7 minute drive. This actually made the biggest difference in our home life. Kids grow up and leave, activities change for all sorts of reasons. I personally think 30 minutes is an entirely fine drive. My best time with my teens is in the car.

 

[Mimm]

Ok, I'm not a good person to ask about this...

 

I chose my kids' piano teacher because she lived in my neighborhood. Four minute drive if the school zone I have to drive through was active. ;) (They've quit piano, but the teacher did turn out to be great.)

 

I drive about 10 minutes to dance, 12 to gymnastics. I live about seven minutes to my daughter's church, eight to my inlaw's house. Around the same to both my brother's house and my sister's house. Oh, and my BIL and SIL's house. My current co-op meets like five minutes away, but in the past they had a few locations and some were as far as 20 minutes away.

 

For three years I attended a co-op that was half an hour away. That was exhausting. :) My older kids have something they attend on a weekly basis that's generally 20 minutes to get to because of the time of day I have to drop them off.

 

I've always had my kids involved in a bunch of activities but rarely have to drive more than 20 minutes to get to them. I miss living in a big city, but I've become a total wimp about dealing with driving and traffic. I wouldn't have signed my kids up for nearly as much if I had to drive an hour to get anywhere. My daughter's dance studio has parents who drive an hour one way to get to dance, some of them come a few times a week. I'd never do that. But I'd never live out in the country where that would be required of me to get anywhere. I love that we live ten minutes away from my husband's work. I love that we live so close to several family members. I live in a low cost of living area, but the ability to drive anywhere I want to easily is a huge perk of this town. I try to focus on that when I get really down about other aspects of this town. I live on the most desirable side of town and everything I need is over here. I rarely ever have to cross to the other side of town.

Edited August 14, 2017 by Mimm

[Hilltopmom]

We moved into town this year after over a decade in the country mainly because I could not take the commute 25-30 min each way anymore. When the teens were little, we went to town msybe twice a week for 4 H or homeschool group. Once they hit the teens it was driving one in mornings for DE classes, then home, then one in afternoons for dance, then often back in late evening for robotics. Too much! And dance started being daily instead of once a week, & robotics increased to a few times a week too... We moved next door to the community college now & 5 minutes from dh's work, the dance studio, library, YMCA, etc- it's Amazing!!!

They can ride their bikes places :)

As a bonus, we're across the street from cousins & a few doors down from my parents!

 

And because we have little kids too, I realized finally that the driving was not just "for a season" but for the next 16 years at least. Dh loves his short commute too.

 

Your younger kids will get involved in activties too in the future.

Edited August 14, 2017 by Hilltopmom

[Dmmetler]

I also wouldn't move for an extracurricular. Our cheer gym has been in the same location for decades (literally) and lost their lease in July. They negotiated to stay until October, but sometime in the next month, we will be moving to a new site (and I have NO CLUE how they're going to move spring floors and tumble tracks!)

 

I drive about 15 minutes each way for DD's college classes. DH's office is..um..8 hours or so? He telecommutes about 95% of the time, but those times he has to go in, well, that drive is a bear ;).

 

 

[ashfern]

Karate is 20 min with no traffic, 45 with traffic

Gymnastics is 15-20 min

Piano is a 5 min walk

[SparklyUnicorn]

30 minutes would be the absolute max for me, and it would have to be something really special.  Our stuff now is about 15-20 min.  DH's work is less than 15 minutes.  Being close to stuff is top priority for us.  We both hate doing a lot of driving.

 

 

[J-rap]

I think you just need to do what's comfortable for you.

 

Does driving stress you or your husband out most?  If it stresses your husband, I'd probably at least look for something closer to his job.  But some people don't mind the drive.  Do you have winters?  That would definitely cause me to re-evaluate.  

 

I always said I'd either live in a small town where everything is very close, or a big condensed city where there are so many opportunities that we could always find something close, or that at least has convenient public transportation.

 

Our kids grew up in a small town and everything was within 5 minutes.  I LOVED that.  With five kids going every which way, it made life so easy!  My husband could come home at lunch.  We could all have dinner together.

 

Then our youngest two got involved with an extra-curricular activity which required us to drive 2.5 hours each way once/week.  It was a wonderful opportunity, and they were our last two home.  We did it during their last two years of high school.  It actually ended up being okay.  We loved having all that time to talk.  We'd stop and eat dinner somewhere on the way in, and listen to the radio together on the long, dark drive home.