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About Plagefille

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  1. What are your thoughts on kids playing city/recreation level sports by grade when the kid was held back a year? My DS had a game this week where the opposing team had a kid, who going by age, would be a grade level above all the other kids. This kid does not have a summer birthday, but a January birthday. He is 1 1/2 years older than multiple boys on our team. I know his birthday and age, but no one could seem to confirm his grade, he goes to a Montessori School with combined grades. So he may or may not be held back a year. The boy is already hitting puberty, when most of the other kids look like little boys still. I estimate he weighs 2 1/2 times what my DS weighs. Besides being older, this kid is big for his age. He is bigger than many of the boys my DDs age, and she is a year older than him. Many people were like, it's rec league, it's not a not a big deal. But I think, yeah it's rec league, the kids shouldn't be getting knocked over by a kid twice their size because he is 1 1/2 years older. Yes, my crazy DS took multiple charges from this older kid. My DH and I couldn't really decide on how issues like this should be handled. IF he HAS really been held back a year in school than should he play with his grade because that is how the league is organized? Or should it be changed to go by birthdays? I
  2. One thing I didn't consider when we moved was kids' activities and sports. It was more than twice the price in one place compared to other. I would have thought it would have been switched, I guess the lower cost area loves their sports!
  3. Plagefille

    Update: Anti screen people, please talk to me.

    I am not totally anti screens, but we severely limit them. When my kids start acting like your are right now, we take a screen fast. No screens at all for a week or two. It helps reset everyone and then we can go back to our 30 minutes a day, or whatever. I have only had to do it a few times and it has always helped.
  4. Average $2.80s in the desert SW
  5. Plagefille

    Does anyone not do any presents for Christmas?

    We do presents here, but we like to be creative. This year my DDs and I created an escape room for my DH and DS. We used stuff from around the house. The present under the tree is the letter that gets them started on their adventure. We had a great time working on it and I am super excited for the boys to do it.
  6. Plagefille

    UPDATE: Hard Work means nothing?

    Usually the 4 a.m., After a long day, after a long weekend, after a long and emotional week, is not the best time to write an important email, but I felt so much clarity as I wrote it. I now feel at peace. After reading and pondering all the advice on this thread, I was able to write an email I believe will allow us to complete this show and leave gracefully and on good terms. After spending a paragraph thanking him for the opportunity to be a part of his company, I basically explained that my frustration had more to do with MY volunteering roles and my role in the casting committee. I explained that I must not understand my role and was therefore frustrated with the casting in general, not necessarily what is specific to my girls. I then stated that I would like to step away from my role in volunteering. Granted I have no idea what my role was since he basically fired us last spring but then introduced us in our old roles when we helped cast last week! Seriously poor organization and communication. I was kind, yet honest. But not brutally honest like his email to me today! That would have just burned the bridge down. Hopefully now we can get through this play and then move on. Now to just convince my girls. They love musical theater and this company, so it will not be easy.
  7. Plagefille

    UPDATE: Hard Work means nothing?

    Thank you for your thoughts and helpful advice. I was feeling pretty awful after his email, thinking that I was a horrible person because of a few complaints. I have put in countless hours for this company because I care about what my kids care about. I was not trying to earn anything. Well, maybe I liked the show fee being scholarshiped because of my work.
  8. Plagefille

    UPDATE: Hard Work means nothing?

    My DH said the same thing. He thinks the director just wanted us there so it looks legitimate to the other parents. I only have complained to two mothers and one of their daughters. I thought since they brought up the unfair casting, it was safe to talk with them. But I guess not. I am pretty sure I know which mom said something to the director, but I don't think she would have tattled, more that it has come up in conversations.
  9. Plagefille

    UPDATE: Hard Work means nothing?

    UPDATE: You are were all right and I was an idiot for not listening to you. I feel like it is time to cut ties with this theater group, but my girls don't want to. It will be hard, but it is probably time. I realized I am Christi or Kelly from Dance Moms, I keep taking my kids back when it is not the right environment. At least he is not verbally abusive... Yet. Who knows it may happen because he apparently really doesn't like me. LONG STORY: (for anyone who wants to hear me babble and then give advice at the end) So, I was fully prepared to cut ties after the show my post was about. Then like stated in the last post, he asked me to be on the casting committee. I still have no idea why, he is not a good communicator. He also took our whole board to go to a play. I guess I felt bad dropping then, so we decided to give it one last try. Our next show was a musical review last winter and everything went well. The main director could not be at auditions because something came up. The rest of us did the cast as a committee, everything went well (only a few disagreements), and my girls got some good parts. I then did not hear anything from the director for a while. Then the next show was announced. I was confused because I didn't know anything about it, and a few days later the whole board was dismissed. He said they just wanted to restructure and not have a board, but have volunteers just per show. I was totally fine with it! I was actually a little relieved and thought it was a good idea. Since we thought we were in a better place and my girls wanted to stay with this group, we signed up for this show. Then I received a text asking why I signed up and paid because he wanted me to help with costumes and my daughter to help with choreography in exchange for the fee. I was confused and wondered why I wasn't told sooner. Yes, as my husband pointed out the director and I have horrible communication. We were out if town for auditions and had to do video. Yet, my girls got really great parts. I realize now, that at this point I should have expressed gratitude... Definitely I could have been better. My one daughter was a lead and the other daughter was a larger part. It seemed as if everything was going fairly well. I even printed all the programs last minute for them when asked. I do have to mention that while my girls did get good parts and we were grateful, the other main leads from the last two shows were mostly the same kids. There are favorites that get leads everytime, and it frustrates me that other kids (not necessarily mine) do not get more opportunities. Now to our current show. When sign ups were sent out, I received a text asking what audition time I wanted and that they would take care of the signup for us. I am not sure why, because there is no longer a board who received free signups in exchange for volunteer hours, but I thought maybe it was to make up for the last show I helped with. I realize now I should have asked for more information. Then the day before auditions I was asked to be on the audition committee again. I said yes and then spent three days watching and judging. We were told that we were not casting any of the leads from the last show as leads this time. We discussed the main leads, cast most of them, but couldn't agree on the others. We ran out of time and everyone left. He and his wife, I am assuming, I don't know for sure, finished the casting and I when saw it I was shocked! Many leads were different from our discussions, some were not even kids we were talking about. Kids who I thought we had all agreed on, were cast in smaller parts. Some of the best kids had small parts and some of the favorites has good parts. One girl has a a lead or larger part every show she has done, but was one of the worst auditions. He likes her and she got a large part. My DD, who had a lead last time, has no lines or solos this time. I was expecting that based on what he had said about leads from the last show getting small parts this time. And I thought I was okay with it. But some of the other leads from the last show got leads this time or larger parts. I was just shocked to see no consistency. My husband says I shouldn't be shocked because it has always been like this. Luckily, my other daughter got a decent part. I was very worried that she was just going to be in the ensemble too, based on a text he had sent. But apparently he changed his mind. For reference, most kids usually get a line or solo. This show however, many do not have parts because he let in 30 percent more kids than was originally planned. Most kids without parts are 8 and under. My kids are both older than that. I sent a text clarifying that DD was ensemble and had no lines and he responded with yes, only so many to go around. I said I understood and that I wish we had more parts for younger kids. I did not list any other frustrations. I then got an email about how ungrateful I am and how I am always complaining and he hates casting because of me. I really have only said something twice in five years. Although I have shared mutual frustration with some other moms. I guess it wasn't mutual? Because he knows and I admit I should have kept my mouth shut. So I really needed to get that off my chest. I think it is time to move on, but my girls want to do this show, and I don't like dropping out after being cast. However, if anyone made it this far, I need advice on how to gracefully repair the damage the director and I have so that we can get through this show and leave on good terms.
  10. Plagefille

    How upset would you be if a family member

    I tried to tell her to bring just one this the first time, and she still brought a ton. The second time I only sort if said something, I didn't really fight it because I wasn't in the mood to go there. My SIL has told her to not worry about bringing extra to her house many times. My mom finally got it, but now just sits in SIL's basement and pouts everytime she's over there. That's even after I tried to explain to my mom how SIL is just trying to be a traditional host where guests don't bring all the food and do all the work.
  11. Plagefille

    How upset would you be if a family member

    Exactly! I have tried to tell my mom this..... I am just never inviting them to a meal again. It is too insulting.
  12. Plagefille

    How upset would you be if a family member

    The two times I have ever tried to host something at my house for my family, my mom has done this. She will even bring all the plates and utensils etc. She always takes over in the spirit of being helpful. But I hate it. It takes away my chance to be a host and leaves me feeling like she doesn't trust me to handle things. The first time she did it, I was upset and annoyed. The second time, I didn't even fight it. I assumed she would do it again and I was right. So for Thanksgiving, that I supposedly hosted, this year I did nothing! I cleaned my house, my husband made the turkey, and everyone else brought the rest of the food. My mom showed up with a ton a food, plates, cups, utensils, tablecloths, toys ( apparently I don't have any?), And a bunch of other stuff. It makes me feel awful because it seems like she thinks I am incapable of doing those things myself. By the way, my life is more together than hers, we make 3x as much money as her, and I am probably more responsible than her.
  13. Plagefille

    What do you think of the remodeled Target stores?

    I do not like the remodel. I can't find anything.
  14. Plagefille

    Q about starting AOPS Geometry mid-way through AOPS Algebra

    Sorry, glitchy internet made a double post.
  15. Plagefille

    Q about starting AOPS Geometry mid-way through AOPS Algebra

    I don't know the answer. I thought I saw someone post on here to finish Algebra before starting Geometry. So I am currently making my DS finish Algebra first, even though we have the geometry book sitting on the shelf. He is fine with it mostly. I told him it's like you're in Algebra 2 now.
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