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About Pronghorn

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    Hive Mind Royal Larvae

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    New Jersey
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    Homeschooling one seventeen-year-old girl: Life of Fred Advanced Algebra, Life of Fred Chemistry (NOT recommended!), Old Western Culture -- The Greeks and The Romans, Pimsleur Chinese, Fundamentals of Written Chinese, Music Theory, Bible, violin, clarinet, bass clarinet, choir, handbells, dance, drawing

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  1. Take him to an ear specialist. We went through an ear problem with our daughter and it ended u p being a chlesteatoma. The general practitioner was no help at all.
  2. My eighteen-year-old, also adopted, still brings two stuffed animals in the car whenever we go someplace. When I drop her off at choir and Dad picks her up, she brings them into choir with her so that they are with her for the trip home. She does not care if her peers judge her. When she took a community college class, one sat on her desk during class. She and her stuffed animals will be moving into a college dorm in another week or so. I try to trust my child to know what she needs.
  3. You can increase your natural melatonin levels by avoiding the blue component of light. I wear amber glasses for a couple of hours before bedtime and a sleep mask in bed. You can find the glasses at These enabled me to get off ambien after years of taking it. If you are wound up or worried, you still will have sleep problems, though. Going to bed and getting up at consistent times also hel ps.
  4. I wonder what the niece sees in this friend. Perhaps in some situations she is a great kid. I wonder if a conversation with your niece would give you a fuller understanding and better tolerance. My child is an easy teen but was very difficult as a child. I am sure she irritated many people. Her own grandmother criticised her behavior constantly, instead of celebrating the progress we made. I wanted to tell people that my daughter had to work way harder than most kids to achieve good behavior! Sometimes I did tell them that! And, of course, I had to work twice as hard too. My daughter's experience and my own challenges in social situations make me very tolerant. I would either suggest using humor or being calmly direct. I would be thankful that this child was not mine. Maybe I would even pray for her.
  5. Sometimes, donating is a way to encourage someone who is feeling down. Raising a little money for a cause helps them feel like their lives are meaningful.
  6. Does anyone have some recommendations for books on maybe a first or second grade reading level that won't seem too babyish for a ten-year-old boy? He gets intimidated by a lot of words on a page. Graphic novels and manga might be best. Cool monsters and lots of action are a plus.
  7. I am delighted to hear this is a trend. And I just thought I had an unusual daughter.
  8. Are you on any Internet forums for parents of kids with attachment and trauma issues? That would be the place to ask for recommendations so that you get a practitioner that will do the right protocols for the types of problems your child may have. I used to be part of the attach-china yahoo group, where some people there had good neurofeedback results. Our kids have mostly grown up, so the group is not very active now. But you could give it a try. There used to be some of the wisest parents in the world on there.
  9. I have not used it but have heard good things about it. The provider may need to understand attachment and trauma. The protocol is different than f or ADHD etc.
  10. I found the pain minimal, much less than when I had my wisdom teeth out. I felt healthier than before within a couple of weeks, but the total recovery time was about six weeks. I did feel fragile and abused for a while. It was hard emotionally, and I even dreamed of buying a pink car. (Pink is normally my least favorite color ever!) My suggestion is to get counseling early on if you need it. I waited too long. ( I had the additional problem of wanting a child, so this was a big big deal for me.) I did have weird insomnia after the hysterectomy. I would wake up with adrenaline rushing through me, feeling like I was tapping into all the mysteries of the universe. Then I would feel terrible the next morning. I don't know why that happened.
  11. I think the difference in behavior with parents and without parents is often unusually pronounced in children with RAD. Also, in RAD, it is NOT because the parents are safer but because they actually feel less safe. They have some level if attachment to parents, which means the parents could hurt them emotionally more than a stranger could.
  12. If she behaves dramatically worse for you than others, I would think there is an attachment disorder in the mix. You might look into neurofeedback, neuroreorganization, emdr. Have you read Nancy Thomas and other writers on attachment? There is probably a good reading list at I would also suggest you get a professional with attachment experience to help you. And try to get som e help for the stress all this has on you.
  13. We finally have a decision. Where: University of Hartford (The Hartt School) Why: quality professors in music composition program, diversity, reputation in the music field, large performing arts scholarship, not extremely far from home Major: Music Composition
  14. My child is still deciding between University of Hartford and University of Southern Maine. She'll be a music composition student. She feels bonds with the professors from both schools, and that seems to be the major factor for her. The costs are pretty close for us. I think she will mourn for the one she turns down!
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