Teachin'Mine Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 I believe that ship has sailed...:sad: :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I'm praying for you. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Ask one of your kids to make a run to the store for you and get some of the things which have been suggested. I'd also suggest calling your doctor you're supposed to see, and ask them for help. Maybe they could call in a prescription. Would letting any of the anger out help? It sounds like you're holding it all inside. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5 Hikers Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 I believe that ship has sailed...:sad: I lost 30 lbs the first month. What helped me the most was staying busy. I ate more and drank more when I kept moving because I didn't have time to sit there and think. DO have heavy spring cleaning, organize those bookshelves in ABC or subject order, or clean out closets. It helped me doing all those things instead of sitting around thinking about it. :grouphug: It is a long, hard process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLocke41 Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 I've had this happen twice in my life. I would recommend doing something as simple as taking a walk. It'll clear your head and get your appetite back. Once you get some food in you, hit the gym. It'll help get you back to level headedness and from there, you can decide what the next best move is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acadie Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 (edited) Julie, if you are peeing only 1x/day, I'm worried and I'm going to disagree with some previous posts by saying it is priority #1 to find some things you can keep down. Water alone will not keep you properly hydrated if you're so dehydrated that you're really dizzy and peeing only once in 24 hrs. Enlist your kids if you need to, to buy or make something that appeals to you. You need some salt, sugar and potassium at a minimum. You can buy Emergen-C or Electromix packets, or here's the homemade rehydration solution we use when anyone's seriously dehydrated-- http://rehydrate.org/solutions/homemade.htm#recipe A spoonful every 10 min if that's all you can keep down, and do add the orange or banana if you can. Also if you can stomach anything salty--pretzels, saltines, salted nuts?--you can decrease or skip the salt in the mix to make it more palatable. Is there anything in the whole, wide world that might appeal to you? Fruit juice cubes? Strawberry smoothie? Donut? Ice cream? Toast with butter, maybe cinnamon? Mashed potato? Anything that sounds good, who cares what the nutritional content. I recently lost several pounds and had serious dizzy spells over emotional issues, so I know it can snowball fast. Hunker down, nurture yourself on this most basic level, and know that there are lots of people rooting for you and sending you loving and healing energy. Everything else can wait for you. Amy Edited May 18, 2012 by Acadie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Just keep up your fluid intake. Beating yourself up about one more thing isn't going to make for a more positive outlook. You will eat when you are ready. DRINK FLUIDS. (That's the extent of my lecture). ;) :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Just another :grouphug:. I'm so very, very sorry, Julie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 :iagree:I lost 30 lbs when my mom died....I couldn't eat without puking. It took a while.... I did the exact same thing. I couldn't afford the 30 lbs either. My family & drs. became quite alarmed. It took me three years to regain the weight at a rate of 10 lbs. per year. I also have low blood sodium levels so I just concentrated on keeping myself hydrated and keeping my sodium levels up. Popcicles were great along with soup bullion or broth. I am so sorry that you are suffering so much right now. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Julie, if you are peeing only 1x/day, I'm worried and I'm going to disagree with some previous posts by saying it is priority #1 to find some things you can keep down. Water alone will not keep you properly hydrated if you're so dehydrated that you're really dizzy and peeing only once in 24 hrs. Enlist your kids if you need to, to buy or make something that appeals to you. You need some salt, sugar and potassium at a minimum. Amy :iagree: I absolutely agree with this. I had reached a point where I was so weak that I could barely get around. My drs. threatened to put me on meds to cause an increase in weight and if I remember correctly I was taking sodium pills and drinking Gatorade. I found the the salty or sour kinds were easier on the stomach that sweet flavors. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaxmum Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Hey Julie, just one more thing. This is totally normal. Also, while now it feels like there is no tomorrow, there actually is. Everyone's story is different, but never quite the tragedy we imagine on the other side. It's very, very difficult to endure, but I can't think of one person who's gone through what you're going through (myself included) who didn't emerge on the other side of this trial in a much better place. Go bravely! :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I lived on water and a multivitamin for weeks about 5 years ago. I was probably clinically depressed, but my kiddo was so very sick, and at the time I could not think about myself. It took weeks, a plan to get him better, and talking to people who had children that survived to pull me out of it. Honestly though I still go through periods when I am stressed that we may deal with it again where I cannot eat. Prayer and keeping busy get me through it. :grouphug: It is not easy to make yourself eat, but please take care of yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Honey girl, that's a sign of depression. Not the kind of depression where you can go buy a new hat and feel better, but a real, clinical depression. You might consider seeing a doctor. You're going through a really bad time right now. That you are clinically depressed is not surprising. I did that once, when my marriage to an abusive adulterer was coming to an end. I lost weight such that I, who am 5'8", weighed only about 115 (he told me I wasn't eating because I was lazy. :glare: ) Happily for me, that was when I became a Christian, and I made a complete recovery--met Mr. Ellie, got married, had two children, lived happily ever after, weigh much more than 115 now :D . So I guess I'd also recommend some spiritual support and encouragement, if you don't have that already (I can't remember if we've ever had that discussion here. My bad.). Julie I do not know what is going on since I've been away from the boards for a week or so....but I can tell you that I lost 20 lbs in a month when my marriage to an adulterer was coming to an end. I am 5'6" and got down to 112. Way too thin. During those worst days people were literally spoon feeding me. I was so shut down and disconnected I couldn't even chew or swallow. It is just a grief you have to get through. I say keep yourself hydrated and keep a bite or two of food in your system and you really be ok, short term. Eventually the crisis mode passes and you can begin to consider food again. And someone pm me and tell me what is wrong. :( (((Julie))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Yes. This. It feels like I'm dying. I have to tell myself, literally, to breathe in and out, because sometimes I'm forgetting, then all of a sudden I realize I need air. I have to eat soon, and I have to get more fluid in. I'm down to visiting the bathroom once a day or so, and my head knows that's not ok, even if my stomach doesn't. (((Julie))). My heart is breaking for you. It is ok that you don't eat much....just stay hydrated and find a way to sleep. Adivan is an awesome gentle sleep aid...no hangover feeling in the morning. I also was prescribed Cymbalta but was so sick at first from no food that I couldn't keep it down.....Some people find anti depressants helpful...I took them for 4 months and they were so so for me. I don't like the numb feeling.... So sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gingerbread Mama Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Julie I do not know what is going on since I've been away from the boards for a week or so....but I can tell you that I lost 20 lbs in a month when my marriage to an adulterer was coming to an end. I am 5'6" and got down to 112. Way too thin. During those worst days people were literally spoon feeding me. I was so shut down and disconnected I couldn't even chew or swallow. It is just a grief you have to get through. I say keep yourself hydrated and keep a bite or two of food in your system and you really be ok, short term. Eventually the crisis mode passes and you can begin to consider food again. And someone pm me and tell me what is wrong. :( (((Julie))) I'll throw in my experience. Like Scarlett, I've had situations get me so down that I just don't function. I'm too zoned out to eat, and, even if I wasn't, looking at food makes me feel like throwing up. I haven't felt that way in a long time, but had something dropped on me this week that has sent me spiraling into that abyss. I know how bad you feel, though my cause is different. I quit taking anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds. I finally decided it wasn't fair for me to have to medicate myself to deal with other people's issues. Of course, for me, if those people would go ON meds they'd be easier to deal with :glare: Anyway, I didn't like them for my situation, BUT I've been considering asking my Dr to call me in a few anti-anxiety just so I can sleep. The no sleeping is making the no eating even worse. Once it's quiet, and the lights are out, my mind starts racing to the "what ifs" and "why is this happening". I think if I could block that out for a week I might be able to get back on the mend. So, anyway, you might call about a short term prescription even if you don't want a long term one. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I'm so sorry for what you're going through. :grouphug: I've been to that excruciatingly painful place before, though for different reasons. When my husband was dying, and then pulled through but with massive brain damage, I didn't want to even live. I didn't care at all that I wasn't eating. A lot of dear people kept pushing food and drinks at me, and I would take a sip here, a bite there, for about a month. Apparently it was enough because I'm here today! Try and get enough to drink -- even just sipping herbal tea. For the rest, even if it's just a bite here and there, that's better than nothing. You'll get through this. I know it seems impossible right now. It probably feels like you will never feel happy again, but you will. Winston Churchill had a saying that I liked. It went like this: "When you're going through hell, keep going." (And eventually you'll find yourself on the other side.) Blessings to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissKNG Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Would you be able to drink stuff like Ensure or even the Slim Fast shakes (some calories and nutrition)? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 The bummer is that I had a regularly scheduled appointment with my doc for this morning, that I'm going to have to cancel in order to go to the marriage counselor. :sad: Honey, I'd go to the counselor. Could it be that you have been swallowing other things you should not have swallowed and now the food won't go down because you have stuffed so many other things down? ;) I am very glad to read you have an appointment with a therapist! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Honey girl, that's a sign of depression. Not the kind of depression where you can go buy a new hat and feel better, but a real, clinical depression. You might consider seeing a doctor. You're going through a really bad time right now. That you are clinically depressed is not surprising. I did that once, when my marriage to an abusive adulterer was coming to an end. I lost weight such that I, who am 5'8", weighed only about 115 (he told me I wasn't eating because I was lazy. ) Happily for me, that was when I became a Christian, and I made a complete recovery--met Mr. Ellie, got married, had two children, lived happily ever after, weigh much more than 115 now . So I guess I'd also recommend some spiritual support and encouragement, if you don't have that already (I can't remember if we've ever had that discussion here. My bad.). :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: :iagree:with Ellie. Very, very strongly agree. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daughterofsarah77 Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Unfortunately, between anxiety/depression and IBS, I have plenty of experience with this. During those times, I leaned heavily on smoothies, drinkable yogurt, those "Naked" Smoothies that had a lot of protein in them, applesauce...jello. Sometimes rice and chicken noodle soup because they are bland and easy on the stomach. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daughterofsarah77 Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 And I really really hope you will see a counselor and get some help...get meds if needed, even for the time being. I played the "I'm so tough I can figure this out, don't need any of that" game for so long, and if I had it to do over again I would have seen a counselor sooner and taken meds sooner. I dropped to 100 lb and at 5'7" that is HORRIBLE : ( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrappyhappymama Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I don't have any suggestions that haven't already been shared. But you have been on my heart for the past several days and I want you to know I am praying for you! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan C. Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I bear stress in my gut, here is my list of foods I can eat when upset, hopefully a few will sound good to you, it must be different for everyone, some of what people posted are their go to foods would make me sick.... Toast Sweet tea (decaf since you are not sleeping well) Fried egg between two pieces of toast scrambled eggs jello broth rice made with broth applesauce And :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereks mom Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Yep. Just drink water, and you'll eat when you're ready (assuming there's not an underlying medical condition, of course). I often go without eating when I'm upset about something. My stomach is the first thing to respond to anger or depression. Me too. I went through an emotionally traumatic time about 3 years ago, and I could. not. eat. for several months! I managed to eat tiny amounts at a time, but I kept a cup of water or juice around pretty much all the time so I would stay hydrated. I think I subsisted on peanut butter with crackers; I could eat that because it was something I could nibble on. I lost almost 30 pounds, and that was actually a good thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted May 19, 2012 Author Share Posted May 19, 2012 18 lbs. down in two weeks. Yesterday I got down half a bowl of mac & cheese, which was always my favorite when I was morning sick. Progress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nova147 Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I'm glad you got something down. I'm praying for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Sounds like you are taking it one day at a time. Here's some hugs for today. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PollyOR Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 18 lbs. down in two weeks.Yesterday I got down half a bowl of mac & cheese, which was always my favorite when I was morning sick. Progress. :grouphug: Julie, I have no advice, but I hope this "hug" reaches you and is felt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teachin'Mine Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 18 lbs. down in two weeks.Yesterday I got down half a bowl of mac & cheese, which was always my favorite when I was morning sick. Progress. So glad to hear that. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mothersweets Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I have not read all the replies, I just wanted to respond to the OP first. I went through this once, it was a weird experience because normally I am emotional eater, but I did have 1 event that left me with zero appetite, no sleep etc. I ate maybe twice in a full week. When I did finally force myself to start eating it was hard because it made me feel sick to eat after having an empty belly for so long. I decided to treat it as if I had been ill for a long time. So I forced, and I do mean forced, myself to eat a few crackers the first morning. Mid morning I choked down about a 1/2 C of broth. Lunch time I forced myself to have 1/2 slice of butter toast. I slowly increased the amounts, but kept it simple and truly forced myself to swallow and keep it down. It took another week or so to be eating proper meals again. They still were not wanted, nor enjoyed but I was able to at least get them down each meal to keep my health. It became a mind over matter issue. I am not good at using mind over matter to avoid eating when I diet but in this case it worked to force myself to eat. It was months before the situation was resolved enough that I started eating properly again (as in getting hunger pains etc) and sleeping right. But in the meantime it simply became the routine to do, I ate at X time whether I felt hungry or not and made sure I ate X amount each time. If the nausea is really severe and starting off with crackers and sips of water and then building to a brat diet just like if you were getting over a tummy bug, than look into maybe trying some antinausea meds for a short period. Things will improve, and I hope the counselling helps, but in the meantime it becomes a battle of wills and forcing yourself to eat because you need to kwwp you health and strength to battle whatever it is making you feel this way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Hmm...just realized I might do ok sucking on a Lifesaver or something.When I'm out today I'll stop in and get some. I only keep sugar-free in the house, but I think I'm looking for the calories & sugar right now. Lemon actually has stomach-calming properties. if you like lemon drops, they might help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissel Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Julie, I was too late to reply on your other thread, but I am so, so sorry about the turn this has taken as well :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: You've been on my mind the last few days too. When I was in a situation like this, I was able to drink water, and I manage to keep small amounts of food down. Really palatable things, like a little bit of mashed potatoes and gravy, mac and cheese, etc. I ate whatever appealed to me, and as much of it as I could, even if it was just a few spoonfuls. I did lose quite a bit of weight, but the minimal grazing I managed got me through to the other side of it all, when my appetite returned. Even a bite or two will help keep you going. But as others have said, staying hydrated is so very important. About the sleep thing, I also agree. Get it however you can. Ask your doc to prescribe something if natural solutions don't work. You must have it. Things look bad now, but they look so much worse on less sleep. I'm so sorry you're going through this :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted May 19, 2012 Author Share Posted May 19, 2012 (edited) Julie, I was too late to reply on your other thread, but I am so, so sorry about the turn this has taken as well :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I wish I knew how to update you all without having the thread derailed or deleted. Let's just say that I know a man who had a non-physical (the wife was able to confirm this to a relatively high degree of certainty), and not even especially romantic telephone relationship for a year with someone his wife saw routinely. The man lied, covered, and snuck out of family time & marital bed to make said lengthy, daily phone calls. The man is remorseful beyond words (and almost beyond life), and his wife, though struggling to breathe in and out, is going to ride this out, right by his side, because a one year aberration doesn't negate almost 50 years of being the most decent & honorable man she knows. It also doesn't cancel out 25 years of being *the one*. The wife will keep breathing, will keep eating, and will begin to sleep eventually, and will stay upright in a vertical position during the times she is supposed to. She's sure that after a while she won't have to work so hard to do those things. (And last night she ate 9 cherries and part of an avocado ;)) Thank you all for your kindness. What an amazing blessing it has been. :grouphug: ETA: I've also heard that it's possible the man took a sledgehammer to his cell phone, then sobbed uncontrollably while placing his wife's ring back on her hand. Edited May 19, 2012 by Julie in CA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Peregrine Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug: I am glad you have some answers. Take care of you, Julie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Julie, you have my prayers. :grouphug: You are a strong woman. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 The wife will keep breathing, will keep eating, and will begin to sleep eventually, and will stay upright in a vertical position during the times she is supposed to. She's sure that after a while she won't have to work so hard to do those things. (And last night she ate 9 cherries and part of an avocado ;)) ETA: I've also heard that it's possible the man took a sledgehammer to his cell phone, then sobbed uncontrollably while placing his wife's ring back on her hand. I am so sorry. But yes, eventually the pain does subside and food taste good again....:) (((Julie))) you will be fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pdalley Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparrow Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug: Little bits of mashed potatoes and gravy has always been the only thing I could eat when it hits the fan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I wish I knew how to update you all . . . Thanks for the update. I have been thinking and praying for you. May God continue to bless you with discernment, both to know the truth and to know what to do as you walk this path. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug: You're in my thoughts. Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calimom04 Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 hugs, I can't eat when stressed either. Its normal for some ppl. It will get better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickenpatty Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug: praying for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Oh, Julie. :grouphug: I will keep praying for you. And your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I am a stress non-eater/non-sleeper, as well. I just do what I can, even if it is only one or two bites or 10 minute cat naps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Negin Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Nyssa Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiramisu Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Julie, You are an amazing person. Go, girl! One step at a time; sips and nibbles when you can manage. You will get through this. May God bless you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teachin'Mine Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Best use for a sledgehammer I've yet heard. That man is blessed with an amazing wife. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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