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Do you find this rude - or is the other party being overly sensitive


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Say a person comments on how fast another person at the table eats. As in, "Wow. You I can't believe you finished that already" or "Hungry? You just ate that really fast."

Do you think the person making the comment is rude? If the other person feels it is rude, are they being overly insensitive?

 

If you don't find a single comment rude - What if the offended person has told the other person in the past that they feel it is rude but the other person still makes comments like that, would you consider it rude to continue making such comments?

 

If the person making the comments has eating issues and takes 30 minutes to pick at 1/2 of a hamburger, do they even have any room to talk about how fast another person may or may not eat? :glare:

 

I personally feel it is impolite to ever comment on how fast another person eats. (Or doesn't eat.) I think it is just proper etiquette. Obviously, other person disagrees.

But do you think anyone ever has a right to comment on another person's eating habits?

 

It's gonna be a long weekend!

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Yes, it is rude of the person making the comment. But if it was said about me, I would take a moment to evaluate if I was shoveling my food in or not. I do know people who eat like they are in a race. It's not healthy and can be rather unpleasant to watch. Obviously if I thought I was eating at a normal pace, I would not listen to that person at all.

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Dh and I are fast eaters. Hello? 10 kids? If the teens leave us anything, an infant is going to want to dip their hand in whatever we manage to get in our plate. God's little diet plans is what we call them.

But I showed Him. I sure did bc now I can eat triple the calories in 1/2 the time. ;P

 

I'd laugh a couple times.

 

Any more than that and I'd be rude enough to ask why she cares?

 

Gotta love family.

 

My mom used to haul off and thump my bil upside the head if he chewed his ice. geez. Bet he just loved holidays with his mil.

Guess I should be fair. She did warn him once that she couldn't stand that.

Edited by Martha
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Dh and I are fast eaters. Hello? 10 kids? If the teens leave us anything, an infant is going to want to dip their hand in whatever we manage to get in our plate. God's little diet plans is what we call them.

But I showed Him. I sure did bc now I can eat triple the calories in 1/2 the time. ;P

 

I'd laugh a couple times.

 

Any more than that and I'd be rude enough to ask why she cares?

 

Gotta love family.

 

My mom used to haul off and thump my bil upside the head if he chewed his ice. geez. Bet he just loved holidays with his mil.

Guess I should be fair. She did warn him once that she couldn't stand that.

 

:lol: my husband and I are fast eaters, too, but it's firehouse eating. I've had to consciously evaluate whether our kids eat too slow or if it's just my perception. I've come to the conclusion it should not take 90 minutes to eat a piece of toast.

 

OP, yes, commenting on someone's eating is rude. Continuing to make comments you know makes someone uncomfortable is rude.

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Say a person comments on how fast another person at the table eats. As in, "Wow. You I can't believe you finished that already" or "Hungry? You just ate that really fast."

Do you think the person making the comment is rude? If the other person feels it is rude, are they being overly insensitive?

 

If you don't find a single comment rude - What if the offended person has told the other person in the past that they feel it is rude but the other person still makes comments like that, would you consider it rude to continue making such comments?

 

If the person making the comments has eating issues and takes 30 minutes to pick at 1/2 of a hamburger, do they even have any room to talk about how fast another person may or may not eat? :glare:

 

I personally feel it is impolite to ever comment on how fast another person eats. (Or doesn't eat.) I think it is just proper etiquette. Obviously, other person disagrees.

But do you think anyone ever has a right to comment on another person's eating habits?

 

It's gonna be a long weekend!

 

 

 

This is really isn't about "rights" but about the desire for peace. Just laugh it off and warn her that if she doesn't hurry it up, you'll be eating off her plate and then do it.

 

Let us know how that works out! :auto:

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I is very rude to make that kind of comment. As an other poster mentioned, silence is golden. Also, if the other person gobbled up the food at lightning speed, I find that rude as well. (bad table manners) AS a host, I would never point it out. I would take it as a complement to my cooking, offer more, and try my best to help all my guest enjoy the whole event.

 

Danielle

Edited by USDGAL
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The only people allowed to comment to someone

about how fast he or she is eating is:

 

Your mom or dad *when you are a child*.

 

After you are grown up, NOBODY can bug

you about how you eat.

 

Say:

"I think I would feel a lot more comfortable if

I didn't get any comments about how I eat. I am

very sensitive about it. Would that be OK?"

 

Or leave the room.

 

I feel so sorry for you! Relatives can be argh....

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Thanks for the input.

 

Meal in question tonight was a diet portion of grilled fish, rice and steamed spinach vs. a large cheeseburger. (Not fast food burger.) Looking at the plates, it seems obvious who would finish first - mostly soft food vs. cheeseburger w/thick bun.

If this person eats with anyone else, they always finish w/the others so it doesn't seem like they are gobbling down their food. Just with this one person. Who says who eats fast vs. who eats insanely slow? Other person is known for their quirky eating habits/issues, so it just comes across as judgmental to all at the table.

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Rude, rude, rude. It is very bad manners to comment on someone else's eating habits and/or to display disgust at someone's food choice.

 

Yes, it is even more rude to continue to make comments after being told that the comments are not appreciated.

 

I will tell my children to slow down at our dinner table when it is just us.

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Say a person comments on how fast another person at the table eats. As in, "Wow. You I can't believe you finished that already" or "Hungry? You just ate that really fast." Do you think the person making the comment is rude? If the other person feels it is rude, are they being overly insensitive?

Yes, that comment is rude. No, the person who scarfed down her food wasn't being overly sensitive.

 

If you don't find a single comment rude - What if the offended person has told the other person in the past that they feel it is rude but the other person still makes comments like that, would you consider it rude to continue making such comments?

Yes.

 

If the person making the comments has eating issues and takes 30 minutes to pick at 1/2 of a hamburger, do they even have any room to talk about how fast another person may or may not eat? :glare:

Oh, but you're not supposed to notice, right? :D

 

But do you think anyone ever has a right to comment on another person's eating habits?

Um...maybe, but not under the circumstances you've described.

 

It's gonna be a long weekend!

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

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Rude. Even if the quick eater was eating really fast and being rude about it, it's bad manners to point out someone else's bad manners. I think the exception would be for immediate family--you've got to be able to work certain things out to live together!

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Say a person comments on how fast another person at the table eats. As in, "Wow. You I can't believe you finished that already" or "Hungry? You just ate that really fast."

Do you think the person making the comment is rude?Not necessarily--could be just friendly banter. If the other person feels it is rude, are they being overly insensitive? Possibly, depending on tone of voice.

 

If you don't find a single comment rude - What if the offended person has told the other person in the past that they feel it is rude but the other person still makes comments like that, would you consider it rude to continue making such comments? yes

 

If the person making the comments has eating issues and takes 30 minutes to pick at 1/2 of a hamburger, do they even have any room to talk about how fast another person may or may not eat? :glare:No, but they are wide open to teasing should you choose to go that way

 

I personally feel it is impolite to ever comment on how fast another person eats. (Or doesn't eat.) I think it is just proper etiquette. Obviously, other person disagrees.

But do you think anyone ever has a right to comment on another person's eating habits? I don't think there is a rule about it and given the situation, it's better to let it roll off. :chillpill:

 

It's gonna be a long weekend!

 

:001_smile:

Edited by Laurie4b
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If it wasn't people who have a close relationship, I would consider it rude. However, eating fast can be unhealthy and can be quite unattractive as well.

 

I have to side with this viewpoint.

 

As a child, my mother ate speedily (with her mouth open), burped without excusing herself, talked with a mouthful of food, and many times choked on her food. As a teen, I died from embarrassment when we ate out and saw the looks of other people who were at the same table.

 

As a married woman, ironically my in-laws battle with this issue. My MIL and SIL "wolf" down their food and literally finish their meal minutes after people are barely beginning to eat. Both MIL and SIL have dealt with weight as long as I can recall. FIL is like myself and we both eat slow and methodically -- enjoying the meal at our leisure. Hubby and son usually finish before FIL and I do, but not like MIL and SIL. It is awkward to see people eat so rapidly... but then perhaps I have been conditioned by my mother as this style of eating is impolite. FIL used to complain that he was the last person at the table for meals -- he in private would speak to son about MIL's and SIL's weight gain issues, but never in front of me or my son. But after a while, he gave up. You cannot change a leopard's spots. I personally do not care how fast MIL or SIL wolf down their food -- they are so much refined compared to my mother. ;)

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I personally feel it is impolite to ever comment on how fast another person eats. (Or doesn't eat.) I think it is just proper etiquette. Obviously, other person disagrees.

But do you think anyone ever has a right to comment on another person's eating habits?

!

 

I think it is improper ettiquette to comment, but I also think the person on the receiving end needs to learn how to ignore tactless people - there are so many of them. As faux paus goes, that's not one of the more severe ones I've heard of. If it is someone tasting unsanctioned samples in the grocery store - I will contact the manager to deal with it.

 

However, when sil ate half a batch of dinner rolls at a familiy dinner at my house with a dozen people present. I could only watch in fascination as she made repeated trips to grab two or three rolls at a time out of the pan. (which is how I knew exactly how many she'd eaten. Now she has a lapband and claims she can't eat bread. we'll see how many rolls she eats tomorrow.)

 

I personally do not care how fast MIL or SIL wolf down their food -- they are so much refined compared to my mother. ;)

 

My bil was a real diet aide - his table manners killed the appetite of anyone sitting within view of him.

Edited by gardenmom5
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I have been at both ends of the spectrum- as a fast food worker and school teacher I learned to "scarf it down" and as a mother of an infant I found it impossible to eat fast enough to finish a plate of food while it was warm (due to all the interruptions). I've also been on the receiving end of this type of comment. Yes, it's rude.

 

I found myself compensating by lingering intentionally over my food, cheeks burning, throat swelling. Imagine enjoying a meal in that state! You have my sympathy.

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Unless it's a parent correcting a child, no, there shouldn't be any comment on how fast anyone eats. That would be by any definition of manners, and certainly according to Miss Manners. On top of that, if it weren't already rude, if it's a subject that's already been discussed as being sensitive to another person, then it's doubly rude.

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Intentionally rude, as it's been an issue in the past.

 

Say a person comments on how fast another person at the table eats. As in, "Wow. You I can't believe you finished that already" or "Hungry? You just ate that really fast."

Do you think the person making the comment is rude? If the other person feels it is rude, are they being overly insensitive?

 

If you don't find a single comment rude - What if the offended person has told the other person in the past that they feel it is rude but the other person still makes comments like that, would you consider it rude to continue making such comments?

 

If the person making the comments has eating issues and takes 30 minutes to pick at 1/2 of a hamburger, do they even have any room to talk about how fast another person may or may not eat? :glare:

 

I personally feel it is impolite to ever comment on how fast another person eats. (Or doesn't eat.) I think it is just proper etiquette. Obviously, other person disagrees.

But do you think anyone ever has a right to comment on another person's eating habits?

 

It's gonna be a long weekend!

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Rude. I also find it rude when they don't like what someone else is eating and find it necessary to comment on said food while it is being eaten.

 

:iagree:

 

I must be old-fashioned but my mom who is from the south was big on proper manners. We don't talk about money, or age, or weight, or make comments about your eating habits, etc.

 

I find all of that to be in terribly poor taste.

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I is very rude to make that kind of comment. As an other poster mentioned, silence is golden. Also, if the other person gobbled up the food at lightning speed, I find that rude as well. (bad table manners) AS a host, I would never point it out. I would take it as a complement to my cooking, offer more, and try my best to help all my guest enjoy the whole event.

 

Danielle

 

:iagree: Exactly.

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I do find it rude to comment on how fast someone eats or how much they eat.

 

ETA: I have always been a fast eater. I don't know why, I just am. I'm kind of sorry to see that some people would find that I am "rude" because of that. Really, such a minor thing would bother some people about somebody else? That just seems so minor and silly to me!

Edited by NanceXToo
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Rude to comment on someone's eating.

 

Rude to fall on food and stuff it down like you haven't been fed in a week.

 

I've witnessed both. My eldest brother once sat at the holiday table and cleared off an entire platter of food, himself, before anyone else had been seated, handed it to me to bring back into the kitchen for a refill.

 

I offered to crack him over the head with it, or stuff it in an oriface of his choice, then informed him I wasn't his waitress, and HE could bring the platter in AND inform Mom where the food had gone. :lol:

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