Curious about bed times....

[tnmomofboys]

I am just curious about bedtimes. Homeschooling allows us some flexibility, but I think I should be more structured. My dc are 11 and 13 and usually go to bed at 10 pm. I am thinking this may be late?? Comments?

[Rose in BC]

My 12 yr dd (will turn 12 next week) generally stays up until 9:30 - 10. She would stay up later but I don't encourage this. She awakens easily and by herself at around 6:30 a.m.

 

My 12 yr ds shares a room with his 10.5 yr brother and we turn lights off at 9. I would say they stay awake until 9:30. They are difficult to awaken in the morning and that's why they have an earlier time. They're usually out of bed at 7:30.

 

I do insist the kids are in their rooms by 8, 8:30 so that I can have some free time.

 

We have always been early to bed types and it wasn't too long ago my kids were in bed at 7:30 - 8. These later hours have been an adjustment for me (who needs some down time in the evenings).

[Lisa in SC]

Ds2 goes to bed at 8, ds9 at 8:30, dd12 at or around 10, dd15 no set time. I don't know as there is truly a "late" bed time. I think it's more about being sure that a) each child gets *enough* sleep, and b) the bedtime fits your family dynamics. I know that "they" say that earlier bedtimes are better because each hour of sleep prior to midnight is more restful than those after midnight. However, we have chosen our children's bedtimes for many reasons: to allow the children some time with daddy; to rule out the possibility of 5 a.m. awakenings (ugh...I'm so not good with those); to coincide with what appears to be their natural sleep cycles. Also, we don't enforce a "time" with our oldest because we feel that she needs to become accustomed to deciding on an appropriate time to go to sleep. We really don't "enforce" a time with dd12 either. She generally is in bed by 10 but likes to read for a little while before drifting off. As long as she's rested, we're ok with that.

 

Lisa

[KAR120C]

DS is 8 and likes to start his day with cartoons at 6:30... so he needs to be in bed by 9:30 or he'll fall back asleep in the morning on the sofa and get irritated that he wasted all his television time snoring. :D

 

If there wasn't any reason to get up at a particular time in the morning I wouldn't be too concerned about his bedtime.

[Mrs Mungo]

My two younger kids are in bed at 8 with lights out at 8:30. My eldest is in bed by 9 and lights out at 9:30. I'm dragging the older two out of bed at 7:30 am

[Sasharowan]

We all go to bed between 10pm and 12am here. But we don't start our day until 9am. My preference would be to have the kids asleep by 10 so I can have a long time alone without hearing MOM, but dh's late work hours mean that they are up til he gets home so they can tell him "just one thing" LOL.

[Mrs Mungo]

We all go to bed between 10pm and 12am here. But we don't start our day until 9am. My preference would be to have the kids asleep by 10 so I can have a long time alone without hearing MOM, but dh's late work hours mean that they are up til he gets home so they can tell him "just one thing" LOL.

 

By "start our day" do you mean that's what time you get up or that's what time you start school and such? No judgment or anything from me, mind you, I'm a night owl, myself.

[Shenan]

For my sanity... The younger ones go to bed at 8am. The older children go to their rooms at 9 but can stay up late, in their rooms, doing something quite. (reading, puzzles, school work, etc.) They usually have lights out between 10 and 11 (on their own).

 

If I didn't have some sort of downtime in the evening, which can only occur when my brain isn't being stimulated with 20 questions and a blaring TV, then I would be up all night wrestling with sleep. A sleepness night leads to a cranky momma and the children don't like a cranky momma in the morning so they respect my need for quite and a comfortable night's sleep.:D

 

Children's ages are 17, 14, 10, 8, 6, and 4.

[Rose in BC]

The older children go to their rooms at 9 but can stay up late, in their rooms, doing something quite. (reading, puzzles, school work, etc.) They usually have lights out between 10 and 11 (on their own).

 

 

 

This is me too. It's how my mom raised us (mom had 7 children) and my intention as the kids get older. In bedroom by nine but can stay awake as long as quiet. My 12 yr dd is pretty much at this point especially since she awakens by herself. The boys will be there soon too.

[Kris]

I just go by how much sleep my son needs to actually function the next day -- and it is a *lot*. We've tried to move his bed time later, but it never works. He's almost 16 now and if he isn't in bed by 10, he drags all the next day.

 

My neighbor's son is 13. He goes to bed by 10, gets up at 9 and starts school at 10, and they are finished by 2.

 

HTH

[Lisa in SC]

For my sanity... The younger ones go to bed at 8am.

 

 

I know it was simply a typo, and it's all in good fun, but I couldn't resist. For my sanity, there are days I wish mine would go to bed at 8 AM too. :lol: :lol:

 

 

Lisa :D

[Ellie]

When my dc were little, their bedtimes were 7-7:30. That left dh and me some adult time in the evenings.

 

By the time they were 9 and 12, their bedtimes were 9ish. Eventually they didn't have bedtimes, but they still went to bed around 10.

 

Unless we had to go somewhere early in the day, I didn't wake dc. They usually woke on their own about 8.

[Shenan]

I know it was simply a typo, and it's all in good fun, but I couldn't resist. For my sanity, there are days I wish mine would go to bed at 8 AM too. :lol: :lol:

 

 

Lisa :D

 

 

HAH!!! See what I get for staying up past MY bedtime!!!:lol: Typo's! Sheesh! That should say 8 PM for anyone else with non-functioning brains like mine!:D (Somehow I don't think there are many of those on these boards, you know non-functioning brains);)

[Laura Corin]

I am just curious about bedtimes. Homeschooling allows us some flexibility, but I think I should be more structured. My dc are 11 and 13 and usually go to bed at 10 pm. I am thinking this may be late?? Comments?

 

I am seeing him needing more sleep these days, so I'm not keen to push the time any later. He wakes at around 7am.

 

Laura

[Peela]

12 and 13yos, bedtime is 8pm, but they can read after that. last night my son read till 9.30, and then he slept in this morning- he realyl needs to be asleep by 9pm to be able to get 10 hours. They get up at 7pm usually so that we can start school at 8am. Otherwise our out of the house activities cut into our school days too much.

 

I have been slack about bedtime and just started cracking down again.

My kids need a good 10 hours sleep. If you work out how much sleep they need (about 10 hours at that age, but you can work it out by seeing how much they sleep naturally, without being disturbed), then you just make sure they get that, if it works for you to have them stay up that late. It doesn't work for me- I want a couple of hours in the evening kid free.

[Plaid Dad]

Bedtime for our dd6 is 8:30 pm, but she is allowed to read herself to sleep and is often up at least an hour after that. She is a night owl like her mama. We almost never schedule things early in the morning, so it's not a problem. In fact, I rather like it because I get my "me time" in the morning before the rest of the family is up.

[Mosaicmind]

With summer coming on we don't have set bedtimes then, but when school is in session and because a few of mine go to public school here are our bedtimes:

 

ds/6= 9pm

ds/8= 9pm

ds/10= 9pm

dd/12= 10 pm (she gets herself up at 6:30 and gets on the bus at 8)

ds/13= 11pm

ds/15= 11pm(he refuses to go to bed earlier even though he has a paper route and school starts for him at 7:30 am)

dd/18= no set bedtime

 

If I could the three youngest ones would be in bed between 8/8:30, but then they would be up at 6am, which is when we are done with the paper route and I try and lay down for a little longer then.

[elegantlion]

My ds 10 goes to bed between 9:30 and 10:00. My dh works long hours and the evening is the only time he gets to spend with dad. We also don't start school until 11:30 so that helps.

 

I love it when the school bus goes by at 7:30am and ds is still asleep. Just another perk of homeschooling.

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

My ds 10 goes to bed between 9:30 and 10:00. My dh works long hours and the evening is the only time he gets to spend with dad. We also don't start school until 11:30 so that helps.

 

I love it when the school bus goes by at 7:30am and ds is still asleep. Just another perk of homeschooling.

 

the kids don't wander up to bed until 9:30-10 because they like to spend some time with their dad. If their dad works late, they stay up and wait for him.

 

They wake up between 7 and 9 - I have an early-riser and a late-sleeper. We start school at 10. I get up with dh and have some me-time.

 

Works for us.

 

K

[TN Mama]

Both the dc go to bed between 7-8pm most nights. For dd7, she has to get up around 6am to catch the bus and requires MUCH SLEEP. Dd5 wakes up early regardless of what time she goes to bed. She's really sleeping in this morning as it is almost 7 and she isn't awake. :)

 

I also don't change bedtime much for summer. We'll still aim to be in bed by 8.

[Mom0012]

My kids (8 and 6 years old) are usually in their rooms by 8:00 and then they will read for about an hour or so. I like that they will spend this time reading, but I wish they were actually asleep by 8:00 because then they would wake up naturally around 7am. The way things are now, they are waking between 8 and 9 on their own. I could wake them at 7, but life is so much happier when I don't.

 

In the summertime, this can get pushed even later because we often hit the bike trail after dinner and won't even get back to the house until 8:00 or 8:30. I know there is nothing wrong with them staying up later as long as they are able to get all their sleep. I really prefer to get an early start, though. I am always torn between them having the reading time in the evening and being able to start at 7 am the next day. I usually let them read.

 

Lisa

[Remudamom]

Mine are 14 and up and for the most part go to bed when they choose. But they have to get up at 6:30 or so.

They usually go to bed around or before ten.

[Another Lynn]

This is such an issue with me! I would love for everyone to be in bed (even if they're looking at books) at 8. But dh sometimes works weird hours for a couple days and then has a day he's home for supper so it's happy Daddy time. Sometimes they camp out together in the sunroom (staying up really late). *I* would love to count on more time to myself in the evening after I've been with them all day. Not that I don't love them - I just need the quiet/alone time. My oldest goes to bed at 9 at the earliest - so everyone else falls inline with that unless they accidentally fall asleep earlier. My general rule is to start "circle time" at nine. Even so, my youngers really need to go to bed earlier.

 

It's also hard now that it's broad daylight until 9:00 here.

 

I would love to have a strict bed time here, but it's a losing battle. If dh ever went back to a strictly first shift schedule I might have a chance.

[Tess in the Burbs]

My kids aren't your kids' ages but I doubt at that age we will be that late. My kids have always been early risers. like 5am kinda people. So they went to bed at 5-6pm when young babies. Now they have an 8pm bedtime but many nights a week we put them down earlier. If my Dd gets up at 6am she's going to bed sooner that night.

 

I wouldn't mind a little later next year and keep moving it up...but for me, until they can sleep until 8am they will keep an early bedtime here. And they do get the chance to sleep late with late nights. we have several things a month that keep them up past 9pm. and they just get up earlier those days....:001_huh:

[angela in ohio]

My 12, 10, and almost-6 yo all go to bed at 8 pm and read for half an hour. I often think about letting 12 yo stay up later, bt (1.) she is the hardest to get up in the morning, and (2.) I (and dh) need that time alone and/or together each evening.

[Chris in VA]

Dd8 goes to bed by 9. I used to have her go at 8 (at the beginning of the year) because the big kids were watching tv, and sometimes it wasn't appropriate for her, so it was just easier to send her to bed to read for half an hour. We got away from that, tho--

 

Ds16 goes to public school, has to get up at 6:15, and takes some meds that knock him out, so he usually is in bed by 11, but it's really better for him to be in bed by 10:30.

 

Ds18 is homeschooled--he's very independent now ( I've kinda given up), so I don't care when he starts his work. For the rest of the year, he can sleep as late as he wants. He's usually in bed by 12, or earlier.

 

Dad is the night owl--he doesn't get up until 8:45 most mornings (except Sat and Sun), and goes to bed around 1.

 

I'm in bed by 11 most nights, sometimes earlier. I'm up with ds16, and I usually stay up, sometimes taking a nap in the afternoon.

 

Ideally, ds16 would be in bed by 10, ds18 by 10:30 or 11, dh by 11, me by 10, and dd by 8. Ain't gonna happen.

[Night Elf]

I think it completely depends on your individual family. There is no right or wrong, IMHO.

 

As for schoolwork: My ds11 works best in late morning to early afternoon. My dd10 works best in late afternoon to late evening.

 

Because of this, we stay up until 12 - 1:00 am. My DH has his own hours because of work but our late nights don't interfere with his sleeping anymore than his early work hours (when working from home) interfere with our sleep.

 

I wake up at 7:00am on weekday mornings because I like to have coffee before I do a few morning chores and then drive my dd15 to school. I usually go back to bed around 9:00am and sleep for a couple of hours. We all get the sleep we need.

 

This lifestyle works well for us.

[Hoggirl]

goes to bed between 9:00 - 9:30 during the school year. He gets up at 7:00.

Now that we are finished with school (YEA!), we will allow him to stay up until 10:00 and awaken when he wants. Same for mom! I LOVE summer!

[Only me]

my ds (10) goes to bed at 9:00 with lights off by 9:30 He has to start schoolwork by 9:00. He is often up at 7:30 and watches TV for awhile.

 

My dd (13) goes to bed at 9:30 with lights off by 10:00. No matter what time she goes to bed she struggles to wake up. She also has to start school by 9:00.

 

I advise my oldest dd (16) to go to bed by 10:30 if at all possible but she often has homework until 11:00. She is up at 6:00.

 

During the summer I usually like them in bed by 11:00 with an occasional earlier or later bedtime depending on our activities the next day. I let them play outside until dark (8:30 or 9:00 during the peak of summer). Then they come in and shower and relax for awhile.

[WTMindy]

It is a little later than I would choose, but this is dh's time to be with the kids and he usually keeps them up reading or doing whatever they do. They are in bed at 9:30-ish (or 10). I get them up at 7:00 when we have co-op and 7:30 when we don't.

[Jann in TX]

DD6 in bed by 9pm up by 7am (for PS)

 

DD 15 'attempts' to be in bed by 10--up at 6:30 most mornings (PS)

 

DD 17 in bed by midnight (night owl)--up by 9 and we start school by 10.

 

When oldest dds were younger (grades 1-5) and both were homeschooled bedtime was 9 and we started school at 8:30.

 

DH likes to spend time with the girls when he gets home from work--around 6:30-7 most nights.

[Old Dominion Heather]

I think it depends on the kids/family. My boys (8, 6, and 2) all go to bed with story, etc... between 8 and 9 p.m. We turn off their light at 9:30-10. Usually the six year old will already be asleep. The 2yo and the 8yo are usually still awake looking at books.

 

I actually feel bad that they have to go to bed so early. My bedtime was 10 when I was six and when I was ten I think it was midnight... and I was in school. But then, I was an only child... and I think that makes a difference.

[Diana in OR]

I am just curious about bedtimes. Homeschooling allows us some flexibility, but I think I should be more structured. My dc are 11 and 13 and usually go to bed at 10 pm. I am thinking this may be late?? Comments?

 

I haven't read all the responses, but my boys go to bed at 10 on school nights. They can stay up to 11 on the weekends. My 14yo has 6:30am weight training 2 days/week. The night before those, his bedtime is 9:30.

[Elisabeth in IL]

My 3 dss (10,8,3) go to bed anywhere from 9:00 to 10:00 and they usually wake at 7:15-7:30. The 3 year old will take a nap or fall asleep earlier.

[Tammy]

which usually ends up around 11pm. We don't get up early though....I am not a morning person....and don't mind if they sleep in....which they always do, LOL! They usually get up around noon...ish!

 

Tammy

[Tammy]

Another thing....even when my kids were very little....they stayed up until 10pm or so....because I wanted them to sleep in the next morning, LOL!

[Crissy]

Because I let my boys wake up naturally when they've had enough sleep, they tend to get about 11 hours a night.

If they're going to be up at a decent hour, I have to send them to bed a bit earlier than they like. Usually between 9 and 10pm.

[H.S. Burrow]

My two (dd 13 & ds 9) are currently STILL in bed! :lol: I have found over the course of this past year that my dd NEEDS more sleep now than when she was younger. This concerned me until I talked with moms of older teenage daughters and found they went through this when their dds were around 13-14. The kids know that they must finish their school work before any other *fun* activities, so as long as the schoolwork is finished, I don't really mind too much *when* we start.

 

My husband is a night owl. Both kids are usually sent to bed to read around 9:00pm. When dh goes to heads to bed, he gives the "lights out" signal.

 

Unless we have somewhere we have to be in the morning (bakesale this past Saturday!) I let them wake when they wake....unless they are still asleep after I've had my second cup of coffee...which I'm working on now...then I wake them.

 

I make sure I have *me* time...both evening & morning:D. I usually get my shower first and then read while dh has time with the kids. In the morning, should my dc get up early (rare, but has been known to happen!) they know NOT to talk to me until I have finished the first cup of coffee!:glare:

 

This summer ds will have morning swim practice at 8:00am so we'll all be getting up early until the end of July!! :ack2: We'll adjust bedtimes as needed...if needed.

[Pamela H in Texas]

Well, depends...

 

My kids don't have a bedtime. THey know they have to get up and get moving and they are responsible for being ready (including having enough sleep) themselves.

 

But it depends on the kid if they are ready for that responsibility. I think "about 6th grade" is a great time in general (and it's the time my own mom did it).

 

I will say that until about January, my teens were in bed by 8 or 9. It's just recently that they've started staying up later. My 13yo regularly stays up til 10 (but is also the first to rise). My 15yo is less consistent with her time, but seems to like 9 better (she's making up for the first 10 years of her life when she didn't like to sleep AT ALL).

 

That isn't much help, huh? Think that they need to get ready for adulthood and learn to self-regulate and that is better to do with your guidance now than when they are having difficulties at a job at 24.

[crazycoffeechic]

which usually ends up around 11pm. We don't get up early though....I am not a morning person....and don't mind if they sleep in....which they always do, LOL! They usually get up around noon...ish!

 

Tammy

 

Same here, I'm not a morning person either.:001_smile:

 

Another thing....even when my kids were very little....they stayed up until 10pm or so....because I wanted them to sleep in the next morning, LOL!

 

I'm so glad I'm not the only one that did that!:lol:

[SusanG]

Our kids have always been night owls. They go to bed between 10:30 and 11, and they get up around 9. We start school by 10 AM. They're 7 and 8, by the way.

[mooooom]

My dd, 12, usually goes to bed early , somewhere between 9 & 10PM. She is usually up around 6:30AM. She likes the morning quiet the way I do. The boys, 13, are probably closer to 11ish. They read in bed, and talk. I think lately they've been getting up around 7:30 - 8 (I actually get up at 5:30 and go to work from 7 - noon so I'm asleep before they are most nights). Haven't had bed times for them in years, although we will speak to the boys if we find they are staying up too late and not getting their schoolwork done (or once, falling asleep during school). I think the more self regulation they have early on, the more likely they'll be able to handle college. And then also, everyone has their own body rhythm thing.

[Jen500]

I try to have my 8 yr olds in their bedroom by 9pm, and if they aren't tired they can read. I used to say 'lights out' at 9:30 but lately it's been more like 10pm.

[LisaKinVA]

Our children's bedtime is 8pm (usually pretty firm about that one, unless company is here -- or because of something special).

 

My oldest has a lamp attached to his bed, and he is allowed to read quietly (usually asleep by 8:30, though).

 

My young-uns are up at 6:00 (if they are sleeping in). They have a bad habit of waking up with the sun (ever tell a kid to go back to bed at 5:30am and have them say, "but mommy, the sun's awake... it's MORNING." )

 

We've had this schedule since ds#1 was born... I need some "down time."

[iquilt]

Mine are still young and are all in their rooms by 7:30, the girls share a room and get to have their light on until 8 if they are quiet (they usually read together) but ds is lights out a bit earlier as he no longer naps and really needs the sleep. They are all up around 7 on their own; keeping them up later has never resulted in them sleeping later, just in grouchy children :)