Joanne Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 I'm sad, scared, worried, anxious, angry and a few other of the emotions on the emotion list they give out in treatment centers. We had a Christmas morning with no presents. We are running a fireworks stand to survive, sharing the duties with a homeless guy who made more money today panhandling than I have in my checking account. I need $1300 by the 31st to keep my house. I don't have it. It's COLD in this part of Texas right now. Fireworks stands are not heated. Not only was it not a "real" Christmas, I am at work. I'm sitting here in a bar running 30 people through 2 poker tournaments on Christmas. Monday I get to go through 4+ hours of psychological testing for a 2 year old, insane, evil custody battle. My kids leave tomorrow for their Dads. Our Christmas dinner? Sloppy joes made from off brands, put on discounted rolls served with clearance veggies from a crock pot taken to the cold fireworks stand. This is not the end of my feelings, but the end of my post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenL Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Saying prayers for you... :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraGB Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 (edited) :grouphug: Oh Joanne. These seasons in our lives - they're absolute beasts. I'm thinking of you, and I know your personality is one of perserverence and triumph. You will win. :grouphug: Edited December 26, 2009 by LauraGB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T'smom Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Praying for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhonda in TX Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 I'm sorry Joanne. :grouphug::grouphug: I'll be praying for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CAMom Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tricia Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newlifemom Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Oh Joanne. These seasons in our lives - they're absolute beasts. I'm thinking of you, and I know your personality is one of perserverence and triumph. You will win. :grouphug: Yeah that! :iagree: :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hsmom3tn Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 I will pray for you, too. I wish there was something more that I could do. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereks mom Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 I am so sorry for what you're going through. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i.love.lucy Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Joanne, I am so sorry for what you are going through and you will certainly be in my prayers. I wish I knew you IRL and we were in the same town so I could have your family over to feed you and cheer you up a little.:grouphug: 10fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfgivas Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 no one promised fair, but man, oh man, that's a whole lot all at once. i'm sorry you're dealing with all of it :grouphug:. :angelsad2: even God weeps when one of His beloved is trudging through such valleys as these... :grouphug::grouphug: ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kristin in Hawaii Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 ... and just get through it. There are no debtors prisons. You will get through this. And sometime you will find a place and private time to let it all out and cry. But right now you've got to put your game face on and hold it together through the Monday meeting. Of course, this is from the gal who just finished snotting and bawling in the shower -- but oh! I feel so much better now. Then I sat and wrote a diary note of all the ways that all the shi**y things that happened in my life brought me to where I am today -- which is actually a pretty good spot, even with a few rough spots ahead. Just don't write stuff down where someone can do bad things with it. I wish I could give you a hug and share some leftovers with you... but I can't. But I will smile and toast you... and send you some positive brain waves your way. Sleep, eat, breathe and don't give in to the dark side. Picture it all working out -- imagine it and let it calm you. Keep us posted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Joanne, I didn't realize. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: I'm so sorry, honey girl. I wish there was something I could do to help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Well that sucks. :grouphug: Rosie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIch elle Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pongo Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug:,that really stinks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Osmosis Mom Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Joanne, Did you guys apply for that mortgage reduction that was issued under Obama to help out people near foreclosure? If you apply real quick, then we know someone who only paid a minimal amount monthly while their application was porcessing (and they actually just got approval!, yah, so they got a decent reduction in their mortgage for the next five years). Just a thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaT Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Joanne, I am so sad for you. I wish there was something I could do for you IRL. I will definitely be praying for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in the Kootenays Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caribbean Queen Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Gather up your birth certificates, driver's license, social security cards etc. and put them in a folder. Check online to find out what documents you need. Get that done by Sunday night. First thing Monday morning go apply for welfare. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5knights3maidens Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jumping In Puddles Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 (edited) :grouphug: I'm sorry you are going through this right now. :grouphug: How old are your kids and how many kids do you have? What about food banks, food stamps/welfare and a service like Toys for Tots for kids presents? We give presents to Toys for Tots every year so families wouldn't have a giftless Christmas. Edited December 26, 2009 by Jumping In Puddles Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: Oh, Joanne, I'm so sorry! When I need a good cry, I take a shower. No one can see you in there. That way you can keep your game face. Hang in there. My dad's favorite saying my help: When you feel like you're at the end of your rope, tie a knot and swing awhile. That's where I am. Hanging on and swinging. I'm getting a little nausious but hey, still hanging. It'll get better. It just has to. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in St Louis Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 You are a strong woman, Joanne! I'll be praying for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted December 26, 2009 Author Share Posted December 26, 2009 Joanne, Did you guys apply for that mortgage reduction that was issued under Obama to help out people near foreclosure? If you apply real quick, then we know someone who only paid a minimal amount monthly while their application was porcessing (and they actually just got approval!, yah, so they got a decent reduction in their mortgage for the next five years). Just a thought. I'm in a "pending and consideration" phase of a modification. I can't miss a payment or I will be booted out of the consideration and the foreclosure papers will be executed (they've already been issued). It's complicated. Very. Short version: When I divorced, I was supposed to refinance within 3 years into my own name. However, it's been during those 3 years that xh reduced child support by $1700 a month and imposed the costly custody battle. My DH has been un-and under employed. So, the house it still in my and xh's name. When I applied for the modification, I asked if we can start the paperwork for us to assume the mortgage from xh. Originally, I was going to refinance and split the equity but the house has been devalued to where there is no equity and it needs a roof and air conditioning. Ironically, it would hurt xh far more than me to walk away from this house. I've already declared bankruptcy (going on 3 years ago now). It would destroy his credit and no amount of explaining to anyone would bail him out of a foreclosure being on paper. If I were some of the names he called me, I would have walked months or years ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dayle in Guatemala Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Ironically, it would hurt xh far more than me to walk away from this house. I've already declared bankruptcy (going on 3 years ago now). It would destroy his credit and no amount of explaining to anyone would bail him out of a foreclosure being on paper. If I were some of the names he called me, I would have walked months or years ago. Joanne--you're a bigger person than I would be in this situation. I don't know how you do it.:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imprimis Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: and prayers that everything will improve soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug: I had no idea. I am so sorry. :grouphug: I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Hoping things get better quickly--if not, take the steps in the dark, knowing he will whisper in your ear when to turn right and when to turn left. There are many people who would take your pain away if we could. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 :grouphug:Aw Joanne, I'm so sorry. Praying for you . . . :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 (edited) Here is what St. Francis de Sales has to say about situations like this: Do not look forward to what may happen tomorrow. The same Everlasting Father who cares for you today will take care of you tomorrow and every day. Either he will shield you from suffering or he will give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace then; put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations, and say continually: The Lord is my Strength and my Shield my heart has trusted in Him and I am helped. He is not only with me but in me and I am in Him. `Prayer of St. Francis de Sales` Write this down somewhere and read it over and over and believe. Times are so hard for many of us and you have added stresses like custody battles, etc. Let Him hold you up. Edited December 29, 2009 by Liz CA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newlifemom Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Do not look forward to what may happen tomorrow. The same Everlasting Father who cares for you today will take care of you tomorrow and every day. Either he will shield you from suffering or he will give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace then; put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations, and say continually: The Lord is my Strength and my Shield my heart has trusted in Him and I am helped. He is not only with me but in me and I am in Him. `Prayer of St. Francis de Sales` Write this down somewhere and read it over and over and believe. Times are so hard for many of us and you have added stresses like custody battles, etc. Let Him hold you up. That's beautiful, Liz. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Osmosis Mom Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Joanne, Sounds like this foreclosure is meant to hurt xh and not you. A lot of us are in bad situations these days -hopefully yours will soon be in the past. I hope whatever happens will bring you guys a clean and hopeful slate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Oh, honey... :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: hopefully things will get better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 I'm praying for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nono Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 It would destroy his credit and no amount of explaining to anyone would bail him out of a foreclosure being on paper. If I were some of the names he called me, I would have walked months or years ago. I'm new 'round here but not new on the planet. One observation: Sometimes it is OK to fulfill a prophecy. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alessandra Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Oh, I just saw this -- I am so sorry for what you are going through. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lisabees Posted December 27, 2009 Share Posted December 27, 2009 Big hugs to you. :grouphug: I am so sorry you have to go through this. I hope things get better for you. You and your kids will be in my thoughts and prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted December 27, 2009 Share Posted December 27, 2009 I am so sorry you are all having to walk through this. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: And your ex? :glare:muttermuttermutter:glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eaglei Posted December 27, 2009 Share Posted December 27, 2009 :grouphug: Oh, Joanne, I'm so sorry! When I need a good cry, I take a shower. No one can see you in there. That way you can keep your game face. Hang in there. My dad's favorite saying my help: When you feel like you're at the end of your rope, tie a knot and swing awhile. That's where I am. Hanging on and swinging. I'm getting a little nausious but hey, still hanging. It'll get better. It just has to. :grouphug: :iagree: We, too, are going through some really rough, scary, and sad stuff. And like Kalah, I'm getting a little naseous from hanging on . . . :grouphug: and prayers, Joanne. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiegirl Posted December 27, 2009 Share Posted December 27, 2009 Joanne, :grouphug: I am so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted December 27, 2009 Share Posted December 27, 2009 I'm praying, especially for Monday. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annabel Lee Posted December 27, 2009 Share Posted December 27, 2009 Oh, ((((Joanne)))) :grouphug:, I'm so sorry. I will pray for relief for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunshine Posted December 27, 2009 Share Posted December 27, 2009 Joann, how awful. Prayers for you and your family. I know what you are going through. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngelBee Posted December 31, 2009 Share Posted December 31, 2009 I am newer on the board, but I am praying for you and your situation. (((hug))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amydavis Posted December 31, 2009 Share Posted December 31, 2009 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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