Am I the only one?

[AimeeM]

With totally supportive neighbors and extended family?

I have never received a negative comment about homeschooling. Not just on this board, but one a couple more I belong to, I see the comments being made to homeschoolers and I cringe. I would explode.

Oh I've had questions from those who know little about homeschooling (my aunt assumed that all "homeschoolers" here went through a virtual public and received their materials free from the state), but nothing negative.

Our neighbors not only tolerate it, they seem to embrace it. We have a retired ps teacher a couple houses down and she offers up her extra supplies (construction paper, magazines for cutting, etc). Other neighbors pitch in with their areas of expertise, ask progress questions (not in a pushy way - they just ask how the children are doing in their studies, what they are studying, etc). My parents and my father in law do the same.

Maybe we just live in a homeschool friendly area. I don't have a point of comparison. The local rinks, zoo, and museums offer "homeschool days"; when we shoot up to Barnes and Noble during the day, we sometimes see other children there doing school work, etc.

The homeschool liason for our local school district is incredibly helpful, although she is an employee of the public schools - always available to answer questions. The public schools themselves are NOT supportive, but the general public seems to be.

Now that I've posted this, I'm sure I'll get a negative comment from someone in my life - just because, ya know, that's how things go :tongue_smilie:.

[lea1]

We seem to be in a pretty homeschool friendly place also. Pretty much everyone we have encountered is very homeschool friendly. Last night we were out to dinner for our son's birthday and started talking to an older lady sitting at the next table. She was very homeschool friendly and, as it turns out, her daughter was homeschooling her child also. It seems there is so much of it here that most people just see it as fairly normal.

[regentrude]

I have never gotten a negative comment about homeschooling either.

I have gotten questions, and I have no problem with those - I remember when I was the clueless person who did not know how homeschooling works.

I suspect that the fact that I am a college professor might contribute to people believing that I know what I'm doing....LOL

Edited September 30, 2012 by regentrude

[chepyl]

My Dad has mad ecomments about DS starting school, but not in over a year. DH's whole family was homeschooled and many now do Homeschool. I have not had any negative comments either.

[Dory]

I've gotten plenty of questions but from the general public, I've never gotten negative comments. Family seems to be split half and half as to whether they think I'm an idiot for doing it or an amazing mom.

[Cassy]

The vast majority of our neighbours, friends and family are reasonably positive about homeschooling. The main comment I get is how it must be such hard work. MIL is the only one who consistently criticises - she hated it when we first started homeschooling and continues to view it as unnecessary and unhealthy.

[happyhomemaker]

I've never had anyone say anything negative. Both sides of our family think the kids are doing great and are very supportive. I've had questions from people in the community, but never in a bad way. We live in a homeschool friendly area, and it never occurred to me that a stranger might be rude about it until I read some of the threads on this board.

[DawnM]

You are fortunate. MOST people in our lives are supportive and those who aren't, we avoid as much as possible.

 

MIL and SIL make all sorts of comments when we are around them and then wonder why we never go visit! :glare: SIL makes sure we know that her kids are in gifted programs and plan to attend elite schools and become cardiologists or whatever.......:glare: To which we do not do any one upsmanship because it isn't worth it. We simply smile and say, "Well, isn't that wonderful!"

 

My parents are supportive.

 

Most people around here are supportive but my neighbor across the street makes sure she tells me how popular her kids are and how much they love school and how she could never "keep them away from all that." Whatever.

 

Dawn

[Tap]

I have had overwhelmingly positive experiences too. We live in a Very homeschool friendly area though.

 

We have had some people come to us years after we started homeschooling, letting us know that they were concerned when we first started. After spending time with our kids now, they are amazed and elated to see how it has worked out for them.

 

The only really negative comment wasn't even aimed at us, but a conversation we overheard in line at Costco between an employee and a customer. I have to say, when it was my turn in line, I laid into the employee pretty hard about making ignorant comments in front of other customers, especially children, who could hear her conversation. My kids were in line with me and she was going on and on about how All the homeschooled kids she knew were very weird. By the end of the conversation, it came out that she only met one homeschooler who went to her public school. This is hilarious in our area because she probably knows a lot of homeschoolers with out realizing it, because it is very common in our area. (Just for example: In my neighborhood of 100 houses-10 of the houses were homeschooling at the same time we homeschooled)

[Night Elf]

I've never had negative comments. In fact, I've been personally thanked by my mother and told that I was doing the right thing by MIL. I'm so very happy that I've had support all along. I haven't even gotten rude comments from strangers. The few that even asked about my kids not being in school were surprised but no one say anything hurtful or stupid.

[sparrow]

We homeschool AND we have adopted internationally. Double whammy! Our experience with comments on both issues have been overwhelmingly positive. I can't decide if it's just because my kids are so awesome or if I give off an extremely fierce mama bear vibe :D.

[momtoamiracle]

No negative comments here. All of my family is totally supportive. Friends too. Even when talking to professionals in tow, teachers, doctors, dentists, they are all supportive.

[Elinor Everywhere]

No, I'm right with you. Supportive family, very relaxed homeschooling state, and lots of museums, rinks, science center, etc with homeschool days and events.

 

I always feel so bad for posters with negative family/friends/community.

[AimeeM]

I will say that I *know* a few people who aren't fans (my best friend's husband and our pediatrician), but they never comment on it directly really. The pediatrician has made a few comments, but never "this is bad" - more along the lines of "she needs to be doing school from 8 am to 2:30 like "other" children her age, lol.

[Farrar]

Our whole family is very supportive too - I've never had anyone say anything negative from my family. I can't say that I've never had a negative comment from anyone, but they've been few and far between and from people who were basically strangers (a friend of a friend, a random person at the store, that sort of thing). And I've had many more random positive comments from strangers. Once, we were doing school at Panera and a stranger bought my kids cookies because we were homeschoolers. :)

[ChristusG]

No negative comments here either!

[hsingscrapper]

My mom is on board now. My sister doesn't want to talk about it, at all. My MIL and FIL are supportive but concerned that the boys should know the exact same stuff as ps kids their age. I sat them both down and explained the classical method and my philosophy on pacing and they've backed off on "content" but notice that Dragon doesn't have any love for following instructions and prefers his own methodology to doing everything.

 

My BILs are supportive. Their wives are both convinced (read=brainwashed) that public school is the only way a child can really learn academics. One of them has the audacity to try to tell me how to teach. :glare: The other says it isn't for her but won't even try it for a summer! :glare:

 

My grandma thinks I'm doing the right thing. My neighbor has said I'm nuts.

[Element]

So far, the only people in my family to get into Ivies were homeschooled K-8 so my family is totally okay with our choice. My family and dh's family are behind us 100%, and my mom actually pays for a significant portion of the curricula and materials we use. My aunts, uncles, and cousins probably think it is a little weird, but no one has ever said anything to me.

 

We haven't really had any issues in the neighborhood, but then again we have lived on the same block since before ds was born and I've been hinting about homeschooling since I was pg. :tongue_smilie:We are probably going to be moving to a new city in 2013 so I am very, VERY nervous. I know I've been lucky.

[Dandelion]

Our extended family is mostly supportive and our friends are either supportive or just don't bring it up. I have gotten a lot of the "I could never homeschool" comments from friends and acquaintances, but that's about it. We also live in an area where homeschooling is common and local businesses/organizations actively cater to homeschoolers.

 

The only negative reaction I've received is from an acquaintance who had been friendly towards me for years, but then stopped returning my emails once she found out that I had started homeschooling. She is a retired public school teacher. ;)

[happypamama]

Nope, you're not the only one. My parents and ILs are totally supportive, and so are the other people we know. We get positive comments from people all the time. Nobody even blinks at seeing kids out in public in the middle of the day.

 

Also, homeschooling is the least of my oddities, LOL. I think everyone's used to us by now.

Edited September 30, 2012 by happypamama

[Mommy22alyns]

Yeah, I haven't had any negative comments either. Becca got a little questioning from her gymnastics teammates though. MIL is supportive because she works in a daycare and sees what some of those kids are like. She can tell ours are the polar opposite! (Yes, I know that there are good daycares out there. But I wouldn't send my girls to that one.)

[tammyw]

We've had mostly positive support, but of course there will always be people who question (what about socialization? is usually the question we get, lol)

[JenC3]

Aimee, I do think our area is VERY friendly. I have also not had a bad comment, only the "I couldn't do it" type of thing. It's a big reason why we don't relocate, it's so friendly and easy to find things to do for home schoolers and places to outsource subjects, etc.

[GoVanGogh]

We live in a very homeschool friendly area, with lots of homeschoolers. Many businesses and city park/rec departments offer homeschool classes.

 

I have only had one negative comment from a stranger and that was last month, after homeschooling six years.

 

I have had loads of negative comments from acquaintances, (former) friends and family, though.

 

Acquaintances: I am active in garden club and there are several retired PS teachers in the club that have made very mean comments to me. I even ran into one lady at the grocery store at 3:15 in the afternoon, a few days after MY school district was out for the summer but her district was still in session. She made an awful comment to me about "being out and about during proper school hours." I was snarky and said, "At 3:15? But our public school lets out at 2:50. Oh, and our school district IS on summer break."

 

Former friends: I lost three friends when we started homeschooling. One told me that homeschooling is child abuse and she couldn't be associated with it. Another told me that she agreed with us homeschooling, but didn't want to have to justify our decision to her former PS-teacher friends. Another is actually my husband's co-worker, though our families had been very friendly prior to us homeschooling. She told me to "get over myself" and go back to work so we could afford private school.

Six years later, I can say that I don't miss a single one the friendships.

 

Family: While we live in homeschool friendly area, our family lives across the country in an area not known to be friendly to homeschoolers. My sister is on board with us homeschooling, but the rest of the family openly questions us and is downright rude.

My grandmother found out we were homeschooling at a family reunion, right after she put a bite of food in her mouth. She sprayed the food everywhere, as she sputtered, "Homeschool? Why the %$*# would you homeschool?!" :tongue_smilie: She was the most vocal against homeschooling, but the rest of our family shares that same view.

[CupOCoffee]

We've not had any negative experiences either. MIL home schooled the youngest 3 of her children, starting with 5th, 6th and 9th grade (she has blessed me with much leftover materials). Have a SIL who keeps switching on and off home schooling her kids. Another SIL sends hers to public school. The BIL who was home schooled from 9th on is married to a home schooled graduate, and they would be my best guess as to who else would fully home school kids. My family is not in the picture.

 

I have had many questions, to be sure. Especially since I work FT. I have neighbors who think I am Wonder Woman, and constantly compliment my kids. Some of the people I work with (academia) have asked "what are you going to do about subjects like chemistry?" knowing that I am not exactly science/math minded. I share with them that there are a multitude of options out there and that it's not a problem! That seems to satisfy them. I don't get asked much about the socialization issue; I know a lot of you get pestered about that.

 

I too feel bad when I hear of those on this board whose family is so non-supportive. It makes me sad. It's really none of anyone's business, but I guess people feel the need to make it their business.

[vwsmith]

No negative comments here. All of my family is totally supportive. Friends too. Even when talking to professionals in tow, teachers, doctors, dentists, they are all supportive.

 

Our piano teacher, dr., dentist, etc. actually LOVE that we homeschool because that makes us more flexible in scheduling :lol: While others have to schedule far in advance we always seemingly get to pop in at a moment's notice.

[ChiMomNP]

Everyone on my DH's side is supportive, my family is supportive or at least they pretend to be :). I only know my neighbors in a wave as you drive by kind of way, I don't even know their names. I don't think they have any idea we homeschool.

[fraidycat]

The only somewhat negative comment I have ever kind of received was via a third party when someone (my high school algebra teacher) made a comment to my mom and she shared the "concern" with me. It was about socialization from her personal experience with homeschooled kids entering high school...and I can kind of see her point. My hometown and where I live now are two completely different worlds as far as social opportunities - probably most especially in the homeschool arena. We have so many social opportunities here that if we even tried to participate in less than half of them, we'd be busy 7 days a week and never actually get any school done.

 

My family and friends (2000 miles away) are supportive and the only neighbour I know or talk to is a homeschooler herself. We met because our kids met at the playground right next to their house in the middle of the day. :)

[Pawz4me]

If I've ever gotten any truly negative comments I've managed to block them out of my memory. Although I do remember a few questions that *maybe* implied some negativity in the way they were worded, and I suspect my SIL (now a retired high school teacher) had some negative opinions when we first began homeschooling, but she kept them to herself.

[Dinsfamily]

I haven't really gotten any negative comments. I thought my parents would take our decision to hs as a comment on their parenting, but they haven't. They became very supportive after there was a shooting at my high school. There are a couple who think we're crazy since our schools are "good," but they aren't negative. We have a large homeschool community and many of my friends are now hs'ing (after removing dc from ps) that we don't stick out so much anymore.

[J-rap]

We've never had any negative comments either, and we are the only ones among my family and my husband's family who homeschool, AND many of my husband's relatives are teachers! They all think it's wonderful.

[FO4UR]

I've lived in 3 different states since we began HSing. Each place is different.

 

I don't get too many adults directly confronting the HS issue with me. (I'm getting really good at the Bean Dip.;)) My dh has had some pressure put on him, largely b/c of the type of work he does.:glare: My dc hear a lot of trash-talk from ps kids. We live close to the ps, and the kids who walk home sometimes cause trouble if mine are out playing at that time of day. Our librarian hosts a book club for school-age kids, and she has (graciously!) squelched an uprising or two aimed at my dc b/c they homeschool.

[Luckymama]

I have never gotten a negative comment about homeschooling! I have gotten many questions from people who have no idea what homeschooling entails (so you get the books from the public school? So the state tells you what to teach? But how do you know what to teach?). Most of those questions come from people who don't know me, dd, or her situation. Friends and family have been so supportive :)

[Lady Florida.]

You're not the only one. No negative comments here.

[LostSurprise]

Never had a negative comment from family, in fact most of them expected us to homeschool even though I didn't express an opinion on it either way. There are a few that are disappointed that I'm not hsing all of them, but they don't say anything.

 

I've also had very positive experiences with strangers as well. The elderly are especially encouraging and say nice things about the boys.

 

Closest thing to a negative comment wasn't even said to me. DS1's public school teacher asked where his younger brother went to school. When he said he was homeschooled (while he attended public school) she said "how awkward." It wasn't to my face though.

[angela in ohio]

Most people are supportive. In our local community, people either keep their problems with it to themselves or they are supportive. :D Either works for me.

 

I still get random sideways questions from in-laws or others. For example, my cousin's new wife made a comment about my 16 yo "going crazy at college" because she never gets to see other young people. :001_huh: (Which is actually the opposite problem of what we have - so busy *with* other people that she has to juggle her work load carefully.) But she's met never-leave-the-house-other-people-are-bad homeschoolers,so it's more just annoying ignorance than any actual venom.

 

My mil used to make comments about all those *other* homeschoolers she knows who do a bad job, but she's sure we do fine. :lol: She quit when she realized I'm not that rewarding in the drama department.

 

Honestly, most of the negative garbage I've gotten over the years has been from other homeschoolers in response to the choices we make or the way we homeschool, and really not non-homeschoolers.

Edited October 1, 2012 by angela in ohio