Pregnancy vs. Newborn - which is worse?

[Canadianmumof5]

Which is worse - those last few months of pregnancy or the first few months with a newborn?

 

I still have 8 weeks to go and I am already SO DONE! I am huge. I can't do much of what I normally do and it is driving me insane. I get tired just having a shower. I have SPD with this pregnancy as well as nasty varicose veins in lots of fun places besides the usual :001_huh: and I just want this baby to be here!

 

In my altered state - I believe that this is the harder part and that once baby is here, things will be better/easier. Yes, I know about sleep deprivation and actually I am OK with that. I can manage that.

 

Am I delusional? Are the last weeks of a pregnancy harder than having a newborn in the house? Am I conveniently forgetting the newborn stage difficulties?

[*********]

Pffft. Pregnancy, hands down. I really did NOT enjoy being pregnant. I thought having a newborn was a breeze compared to pregnancy. :tongue_smilie:

[lovinmomma]

I voted that they are both equally hard, but as I thought about it...I'm pretty sure that the 3rd trimester is harder now that I think about all of the aches and pains and the fact that I have to get up to pee every 45min. at night during the last month or so of my pregnancies.

[Firefly]

I *loved* being pregnant. The newborn period was by far worse. I need SLEEP! :tongue_smilie:

[Scuff]

Babies sleep. With my bladder only holding a teaspoon, heartburn and backache, I am not. My almost 2yo was a breaze as a baby. (I imagine it'd probably depnd on the baby) Being close to the end eith a toddler is not.

 

I was up about every hour last night. It'd be hard to get less sleep when the baby is here.

[BigMamaBird]

I had a tougher last few weeks with my latest pregnancy, but I'd still say the newborn stage is harder. When you're pregnant there are not middle of the night feedings, diaper changings, lugging around of carseats, etc. But you do have the sweet little baby, you can sleep on your back and you're not it the bathroom every hour, so I think they even out.

[Night Elf]

For me personally,the last couple of months were torture. Maybe I was lucky, but the newborn stage just didn't bother me. Both of my girls did develop colic and that was not fun but it was still preferable to how absolutely miserable I felt at the end of my pregnancy. With the baby, I could at least walk away and take a stress break.

[Canadianmumof5]

Ok....so maybe I am not completely delusional after all......

[Bee Happy]

When I was pregnant with the last one, I thought it was worse.

I had severe pelvic pain (spd), morning sickness came back, I couldn't reach anything. Standing made me miserable. Moving made me miserable. -- I should have just relaxed and kept my feet up, but I was overpowered with the desire to DO. Clean, move things, buy, knit...Which only made me exhausted beyond words. Yet, I still couldn't sleep.

 

Then the baby was born. And she wouldn't let me put her down...ever. She was colicky. My husband works away from home so it was me and the baby. That was a very hard time and much worse than the pregnancy was.

 

All worth it though!

Edited August 20, 2012 by Bee Happy

[Bee Happy]

BTW, I think it depends on what type of pregnancy or newborn you have. My first pregnancy was textbook perfect. So was the baby. The next pregnancies were very hard. So were the babies. LOL

[BinahYeteirah]

I find the newborn stage more difficult, but every woman, and no doubt each pregnancy/baby, is different. I have terrible nausea (sometimes to the point of hyperemesis) during the first half to two thirds of my pregnancies, but it is almost gone by the time I reach the third trimester. So I usually feel better during the third trimester than I do during any other part of the pregnancy, even though most women feel pretty uncomfortable toward the end. I generally feel a lot more energetic toward the end of my pregnancy than I do after the baby is born and I'm sleep deprived. This is all very fresh for me, because I'm in the newborn stage right now with a three-week-old. It's not the actual newborn that is the most part difficult for me now; it's that all my older kids are going through a transition. The toddler is loves the baby, but is more needy and tantrum-y. The other kids are taking advantage of my distraction and acting crazy, etc.

[HappyLady]

Except for the 1st trimester (nausea), I had wonderful pregnancies! :) I didn't have to start wearing maternity clothes until about the 7th month, I wasn't uncomfortable, I didn't have heartburn, I didn't have to pee every 3 seconds, I slept comfortably, the baby was never in an uncomfortable position........ My OB said since I'm tall I have a "luxury womb" because the baby had plenty of room which is why I didn't experience any of the "bad" stuff and didn't start showing to the public until about my 7th month. :lol: Now, the deliveries and the newborn stages are a different story. :glare:

[MrsMommy]

Having just been through it, I say newborn is more difficult. Not physically, obviously (and I have high-risk pregnancies), but I have not been able to figure out how to keep my students from being distracted by their baby sister! She's almost five months old, now, and they're still just as enamored with her as they were the day she was born. It's so hard to get anything done with her around to be loved on, and now that she's doing so many new things, it's even worse! They want to watch her and be with her constantly, which makes teaching a bit of a challenge.

 

At least I'm no longer huge and uncomfortable and exhausted (well, not as exhausted...she's still not sleeping well at night!).

[Aoife]

my newborns are easy peasy (watch now that I have said that this one will be the holy terror :lol: )

 

Pregnancy is way harder for me because I have hip problems to begin with compounded by SPD however this pregnancy I have be working out like crazy every other day which has really helped my physical condition as well as my energy. I am currently taking a break for a protein shake before I get up and finish the extreme overhaul of our main floor greatroom I get bad nesting urges which usually end in moving furniture and huge organizational undertakings :lol:

[*Lulu*]

I voted other; based on my experience that every time through is different.

 

With Punk the pregnancy was pretty easy, but the newborn stage included colic and that was the pits. With Sister both parts were so easy I have to choose 3rd trimester since I was using the bathroom every hour on the hour. (Or more!) With Bug both parts were very difficult due to medical issues.

 

There, that was helpful wasn't it! :tongue_smilie:

[Ravin]

I think it depends on the individual circumstances. An uncomplicated pregnancy is likely to be easier, for example, than recovering from a C-section or dealing with breastfeeding complications.

 

I'd say both have their own set of challenges. I was working right up to the end with DS and it was rough. DD was harder after, the C-section (both were C's) was a tough recovery for me and we had bf'ing obstacles.

 

Sleep deprivation isn't that much a problem if you're cosleeping and breastfeeding (or set up premade bottles in a mini fridge next to the bed with a bottle warmer on top).

[VeganCupcake]

My pregnancies have been really easy, and my babies have not been. I definitely think being pregnant is much easier.

[coffeegal]

How difficult was the labor and pregnancy? An easy labor and pregnancy tended to leave me feeling much better after the baby was born than before. However the time I ended up on bed rest and the time I broke my tailbone during labor was opposite. It took forever to get back on my feet. :glare:

[BamaTanya]

I've experienced it both ways. With the first couple of dc, the pregnancy was easier. Maybe because I was a new mom and hovered so much after they got here?? :D

 

The last two in particular -- well, my body was shot. I seemed to have Braxton-Hicks constantly and the pressure was nearly unbearable. I felt instantaneously lighter and more energetic with the delivery. Yes, they nursed around the clock, but I actually slept better than I had in my couldn't-get-comfortable-in-any-position pregnant body.

 

So . . . both??? :D

[lmrich]

Pregnant when you already have little ones is the hardest. At least after you have the baby - well you have the baby and there are a lot of good/great parts of having a newborn as well as hard parts!

[chepyl]

Pregnancy!! In the newborn stage, you get to snuggle, but you can put the extra weight down when you need to and getting dressed is easier ;)

[higginszoo]

Yes, you're delusional, but I remember having the same delusions. At 30-something weeks with my youngest, who has always been very active, I remember thinking that I couldn't wait to have the baby so I could get some sleep. Then I laughed at myself because I knew better. I could pass her off to dh for a few hours in the evening since we had to supplement with bottles anyway ... but she was a round the clock eater for the first 3 months, and didn't really sleep for the first 18 months (not through the night until 3, and she is still a night waker at 7 1/2), so it hasn't really been any easier than pregnancy, just different.

[staceyobu]

I had a miserable last pregnancy. So, I'd vote pregnancy is harder. Having a sweet, cuddly newborn makes waking up at night way more worth it! At 2 weeks postpartum, I felt better than I had in the last nine months!

[redsquirrel]

I voted 'both equal'. I found them both wonderful and both horrible in their own way.

 

Not enough wonderful in either part to be willing to do it again though. :lol:

[momto10blessings]

I voted end of pregnancy. You're huge and exhausted. You're nervous about the impending birth. You have to pee every half an hour. You can;t sleep. You're busting out of your clothes.

 

Newborn stage is demanding as well, but you're high on adrenaline and the sweet sounds and faces your newborn makes is worth every second of the getting up 5 times in the night to feed, change diaper blowouts or comfort a screaming baby

[mamajudy]

I *loved* being pregnant. The newborn period was by far worse. I need SLEEP! :tongue_smilie:

 

:iagree: I was blessed with five uncomplicated pregnancies. Yes, there was some discomfort toward the end, but generally, I felt great. I realize everyone is different, but I wonder how much weight you gained and if that had anything to do with the discomfort. I only gained about 20 lbs. My babies were between 8 and 9 lbs. I had no family to help out after the baby was born - it was just me and DH, and I was nursing, so most of the responsibility was mine. I was tired!

Edited August 20, 2012 by mamajudy

[OH_Homeschooler]

Pregnancy is way harder! Sleep is impossible and you can't take melatonin to help. If you don't nurse, then DH can help with feeding a baby in the middle of the night. Even if you do nurse, at least when you are awake in the middle of the night it's for a good reason! I'd much rather be up with a sweet sleepy baby than because I peed for the 5th time in 5 hours and can't get back to sleep because I'm all worried about everything.

[Lab1]

Pregnancy hands down! I've had 3 very high needs babies too for various reasons.

[G5052]

I was high risk, so the flood of appointments drove me crazy. And being large and constantly suffering from morning sickness and heartburn made me miserable.

 

Afterwards you're tired, but you mostly stay home and food stays in again.

[Parrothead]

The waiting was hard. Dd was a great baby. All she did was sleep and eat for months. It was kind of boring. We'd wake her up so we could play with her.

[lea_lpz]

I vote for last eight weeks and weeks 4-12 of pregnancy :glare:

[Leanna Tomlinson]

I voted 3rd trimester, but I might be biased since I'm only 2 weeks behind you. :)

 

I think the third trimester was designed by God to make us actually look forward to labor.;)

[melmichigan]

I was always labeled high risk. My triplet pregnancy was the worst, I was on bedrest from the time we knew the third was in trouble. That's a long time on bedrest.

 

I still voted newborn is the hardest because I don't deal with sleep deprivation well. :tongue_smilie:

[sbgrace]

I'm not sure I would have felt this way if we hadn't had twins but newborn was much more difficult here. I thought I would never sleep again and took 4 months just to get out of survival mode.

[Seasider]

My doc used to say that they were a lot easier to babysit when they were still on the INside.:D

 

I believe that the first few weeks with a newborn are much harder, but much more rewarding. There's joy for the effort, kwim? Nothing matches cuddling a sweet tiny fresh-washed infant, even when you're a sleep-deprived mama.

[Soror]

For my last 2 pregnancies the pregnancy was harder than the newborn stage, although they were easy pregnancies. They both slept pretty well though and I do pretty well nursing and sleeping. It was so nice as well to have my body back and more energy and not to be so blasted slow. My first pregnancy was harder but my baby was also infinitely harder so the newborn stage was harder with him.

[Kathryn]

It depends on the pregnancy and the newborn. Both times I've been ready to evacuate my uterus by eight months, but both times when I actually had a screaming, pooping, eating, not-sleeping newborn I was ready to put them back in.

[justLisa]

I really did not like being pregnant. DS was a BREEZE. I basically sat on my arse all day and nursed.

 

Next one not so much.

[duckabell]

I voted newborn. I have fairly easy pregnancies and only get up to go to the bathroom perhaps once a night while pregnant as compared to multiple times for feeding. I also feel more isolated with a newborn (especially my first) and somewhat tied down with breastfeeding. I do give myself grace with a newborn and I truly don't expect anything to get done around the house for the first three months. The challenge is that I work from home part-time and I'm not quite sure how to juggle work with a newborn and working very lightly doing preschool/kindergarten with my son.

 

Some things that I do find difficult with pregnancies is when the baby arrives eight days late and you do everything you can (except castor oil) to help the baby come. At least this time I believe that nothing works except when the baby is ready. This pregnancy has also been hard for me because I've been more worried about the baby and have had more braxton hicks and such, but I also worry a lot about newborns so it kind of evens out.

[prairiewindmomma]

I have spd this pregnancy too....I really need to believe pregnancy is harder. I can't take my usual meds for arthritis and that's further complicating things....I'm in pain 24/7. Sometimes my pain levels are low enough for me to sleep, but sometimes not.

 

 

In 3/4 of my previous pregnancies, pregnancy was harder. I LOVE finally being delivered and getting to sleep. The only time newborn phase was harder was when I had a complicated c-section that didn't heal well and a newborn who was a colicky refluxer = 12 outfits a day. He didn't sleep for more than an hour or two until he was 6 months +.

[Seeking Squirrels]

With my first I'd have said pregnancy was worse. This time around, equal. I have horrible pregnancys and spend the whole time sick and miserable. Pregnancy was far worse than my first two weeks home with baby. But then the following three weeks when baby got colic and reflux... That was comparable. Now going into week six meds are helping her some and it's been a little better.

[edelweiss]

I *loved* being pregnant. The newborn period was by far worse. I need SLEEP! :tongue_smilie:

 

:iagree: My pregnancies were easy peasy. Both of my babies came a week early. :glare: I really wanted them to stay in until at least their due dates. They were much harder to take care of on the outside. :lol: I also need my sleep!

[Miss Marple]

Give me labor/delivery/newborn any day over 9 months of pregnancy. Once that baby is out I'm a new woman.

[Caitilin]

Give me labor/delivery/newborn any day over 9 months of pregnancy. Once that baby is out I'm a new woman.

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:

There are not enough smilies to demonstrate my agreement with this,:lol:!

[BlsdMama]

Newborn is a piece of cake. You lay on the couch with a breast in their mouth for the first month. It's easy peasy. :D

 

That said, my third trimesters are a nightmare. We work very hard to make it to 36 weeks. Last pregnancy that involved (surgery) and a nice hospital stay from 34 weeks to 36 weeks. No. I'll take a newborn ten times over than the end of pregnancy, sigh.

 

However, delivery is pretty awesome... Not that I'm a sadist for pain, but it's a very empowering, amazing, glorious experience.

[Audrey]

Pregnancy is the easy part. Birth sucks rocks and it gets easier after that, but pregnancy is still, hands down, the easy-breezy part of it all.

[Janie Grace]

I'm sorry but people who say "newborn is harder" did not have SPD! I feel your pain, and there is not much worse than 3rd trimester with SPD. Having a sweet baby to snuggle is WAY better than barely being able to move without excruciating pain -- even if you ARE sleep-deprived when babe is here. You will make it!!! So sorry you're suffering.

[Pretty in Pink]

I love being pregnant, absolutely adore it. The newborn stage is delicious and snuggly and all of that but, oh my, is it sleepy! I find the newborn stage more physically draining than the last trimester, hands down.

[AndyJoy]

I *loved* being pregnant. The newborn period was by far worse. I need SLEEP! :tongue_smilie:

:iagree: Same here. But I was pregnant with my first, so the 3rd trimester would have been worse if I'd had to do more than sit on the couch and watch Gilmore Girls.

[ErinE]

For both kids, pregnancy, hands down. I had carpal tunnel syndrome, sciatic nerve pain, and my ribs constantly ached. I got less sleep in the last two months of pregnancy than I did with a newborn. I may have lucked out as I had big babies and by six weeks, they were sleeping from midnight to 5-6 am.