s/o words that bother us -- what about this word?

[TheReader]

I am not the most conservative person around, nor the most liberal, but I'm aware that in some circles the word/phrase "That sucks!" is considered inappropriate.

 

I try and remember to use "That stinks!" or something instead, but I'm honestly never sure these days who's likely to be bothered by "sucks" and who's not.

 

General thoughts??

 

Bothersome enough of a phrase that I should work on not saying it at all (and get my kids to not say it either) or acceptable enough that I can not cringe inside if I let it slip by accident?

[SquirrellyMama]

I am not offended by that phrase. I know people that are and that's fine.

 

but I'm honestly never sure these days who's likely to be bothered by "sucks" and who's not.

 

This frustrates me. I'm tired of tiptoeing around people trying not to offend them. You can replace "sucks" with just about any exclamation and I probably know someone who is offended by it.

 

 

Kelly

Edited February 8, 2012 by kwiech

[chepyl]

I don't like the phrase.

[Mommyof4ks]

We only say that at home. My kids know that it is ok at home, but it is not appropriate out of the house, because it is offensive to some people. It does not bother me obviously, but I do not want to offend someone else since it is a controversial word.

[Mommy_of_4]

Not offended. I say it all the time.

[TheReader]

I am not offended by that phrase. I know people that are and that's fine.

 

 

 

This frustrates me. I'm tired of tiptoeing around people trying not to offend them. You can replace "sucks" with just about any exclamation and I probably know someone who is offended by it.

 

 

Kelly

 

That's what made me ask the question; we were with some friends and their son said it and both parents got this shocked look on their faces and admonished him to watch his language.

 

At which point I mentally scanned conversations I've had in front of him, or my boys have had, and wondered, "Uh-oh, did he hear that from us???"

 

It was especially shocking to me from this family, because same little boy a year prior to that had written a note with the F-word in it and at the time they just said "That's not very nice" and laughed it off. So the turn-around took me by surprise.

[dirty ethel rackham]

I don't like it. It is rarely said in our house. I have been known to use it only under really "sucky" circumstances. ;)

[tammyw]

I don't say "that sucks", because it doesn't sound right in my mouth, but I do say "that stinks".

[In the Rain]

The phrase doesn't bother me. I'm sure I say it, but I wouldn't say it in front of older people, or people I have a more formal relationship with.

[NanceXToo]

Doesn't bother me and I do use it sometimes.

[goldberry]

The phrase doesn't bother me. I'm sure I say it, but I wouldn't say it in front of older people, or people I have a more formal relationship with.

 

:iagree:I say it at home or with close friends, but don't consider it very "mannerly".

[Princess Peach]

:iagree:I say it at home or with close friends, but don't consider it very "mannerly".

 

:iagree: I would add that I don't really like to hear it from my kids, but they don't get in trouble for using it.

[lakshmi]

Weird.

 

I never even once thought about it. It seems like we like the words with latin and french roots but any words with German roots can forget about it.

 

I use it and think it is sort of odd that there is aproblem. I can't fathom why? I can understand why Pissed off is problem because it has such a visual associated with it. And then again, maybe some folks find sucking rude as well.

[georgialee]

I say it but would prefer my boys not to say it (probably won't care once they're older though). It doesn't offend me at all if someone else says it.

[SquirrellyMama]

Weird.

 

I never even once thought about it. It seems like we like the words with latin and french roots but any words with German roots can forget about it.

 

I use it and think it is sort of odd that there is aproblem. I can't fathom why? I can understand why Pissed off is problem because it has such a visual associated with it. And then again, maybe some folks find sucking rude as well.

 

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

Clear as mud? :tongue_smilie:

 

Kelly

[melissel]

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

Clear as mud? :tongue_smilie:

 

Kelly

 

:iagree: Anytime I've ever heard "That sucks" elaborated on, the continuation was ugly. I've never heard anyone say "That sucks lollipops!"

 

I agree with those who said they say it and are not offended by it, but I expect my kids not to say it as I would expect them to not say any other curse word, mild or otherwise. For me, that includes "h*ll" and "d@amn" as well as the bigger ones. I don't use those words in polite company myself, but I'm comfortable using them among friends or with my DH (who has more of a potty mouth than I do, but also a better filter :tongue_smilie:).

[chepyl]

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

Clear as mud? :tongue_smilie:

 

Kelly

 

This is why I don't like it, I heard it in this format. Everytime I hear it, I think of the full phrase amd it is offensive.

[Anne]

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

 

This is why I don't like this phrase - I'm old enough to have heard the full phrase quite a bit before the abbreviated phrase became popular - and now, of course, can't get the full phrase out of my head... :tongue_smilie:

 

Anne

[curlylocks]

I don't like it...we don't use it. ;) (any of us -- parents or children)

[Julie in CA]

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

Clear as mud? :tongue_smilie:

 

Kelly

Yes, this is why I don't like it, and in some ways, I consider it ruder than "the F word". When I was younger, it was always "sucks {insert crude name for male body part}". It has nothing to do with the language of origin, but rather, the s3xual connotation.

[Robyn]

Ds13 will say this once in awhile. It wouldn't bother me too much coming from him, but when my 5 or 2 year old imitate him it sounds awful, so I generally discourage him when it slips out.

[garddwr]

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

Clear as mud? :tongue_smilie:

 

Kelly

 

:iagree:

This is also how I as introduced to the phrase, and I heard it this way almost exclusively until I grew up enough to choose my own associates (i.e. graduated from high school)--now I just here the abbreviated phrase, but it calls to mind the "expanded" form for me, and therefor bothers me. I have the same problem with mock swear words--you know, something that starts with f but isn't the real f-word, etc. All it does is call the "real thing" to my mind.

 

--Sarah

[JessReplanted]

I don't let my kids say that.

 

I only say it with my husband & my best friend. ;)

[T'smom]

I think it's an age thing. My mom is very offended by it, but I'm not and use it quite a bit. I think awhile back the phrase was longer, but it just doesn't have that meaning anymore.

[Tranquility7]

I am not offended by it, but I do think it is a tawdry colloquialism. It comes across as cheap and inelegant communication. To hear a leader say it would probably diminish my respect for them.

 

My children will never get in trouble for saying it, but I will probably respond to them by asking them to tell me a more articulate (and respectable) way to express their thought

 

I also don’t want them saying “like”, “you know”, “just sayin’”, etc. I know it is hard to rid ourselves of that kind of language (DH and I try to help each other with this!), but aren’t we trying to raise winsome, gracious, articulate, communicators?

 

I know “that sucks” is a little different than what this video is about, but I think the same principle underlies both -

[FeFe]

I say it and my kids sometimes say it.

 

But I must be a hypocrite because it sounds really strange when a little kid says it or when someone over 60 says it. I'm not offended, it just sounds weird.

[SquirrellyMama]

I am not offended by it, but I do think it is a tawdry colloquialism. It comes across as cheap and inelegant communication. To hear a leader say it would probably diminish my respect for them.

 

My children will never get in trouble for saying it, but I will probably respond to them by asking them to tell me a more articulate (and respectable) way to express their thought

 

 

I guess I use the word "s*cks" or other possibly bad words when I'm mad. Not just a little mad but utterly past what I can handle, mad. I'm not trying to be elegant or respectable at that point. If I'm less angry I might choose more elegant words but at the point that I use s*cks or other inelegant words I'm trying to let people know how angry I am.

 

Kelly

[Laura Corin]

I'm not fond of the phrase - I don't use it.

 

Laura

[angela in ohio]

Search for the old thread on this... it was looonnnggg. Everyone has an opinion on this word! :D

 

We don't use it here. If it was the only word possible at all to express a concept, I'd re-think it, but as long as there are better choices, no.

[LisainOhio]

I don't use it but I'm not offended if someone else uses it. After reading this thread I'm going to start saying "That sucks lollipops!" because that cracked me up! :D

[Tree House Academy]

I have stopped saying it so much because I my 12 year old started saying it. It sounded so bad (to me) coming out of his mouth, that I decided I didn't want to use it anymore either.

 

Other words that I stopped using once I heard my kids say them include:

 

crap

screwed (as in, "we're screwed")

freakin'

fricken'

[cin]

Sucks and Crap are my extreme words.

 

I hate the word panties. It just sounds creepy to me.

[angela in ohio]

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

Clear as mud? :tongue_smilie:

 

Kelly

 

Yep.

 

I don't even think it's a matter of it losing that meaning. When young people say it repeatedly, I ask them, "It s*cks what?" They generally turn bright red, get a sly smirk, and decline to answer. They know exactly what it means, but they don't want to finish it, just like when they say, "What the?!" They get away with using it because they don't finish the phrase.

[cindergretta]

Hmm, I have never heard the "whole phrase." Ever. (I will be 39 in about 2 weeks. Am I too young? Please, let me be too young! :tongue_smilie: )

 

Anyway, like I said, I have never heard it with the male body part following it so it doesn't have that connotation for me. That said, I don't care for it, or for screwed, either. But I don't care for them in that I don't use them but am I offended if others do? Nope, not at all. I don't really care.

 

I think any kind of swearing or vulgar language in mixed company is not cool. Among those closest to us, speak freely. Out in the big wide world, it is just polite to attempt to curb some of the language. But it needs to be understood that someone out there will take offense at any given word or phrase, so I draw the line at dictating who should say what, when. It is up to each individual to attempt to censor themselves based on what they know or don't know about the situation and people in it.

 

(I have a dear friend who has the *worst* foul mouth I have *ever* heard and she has no filter as to when and where. It is truly cringe worthy. And yet...)

[angela in ohio]

Hmm, I have never heard the "whole phrase." Ever. (I will be 39 in about 2 weeks. Am I too young? Please, let me be too young! :tongue_smilie: )

 

I'm 38 and I've heard it many times. Guys used to say it all the time in college. Maybe it's a regional thing? :D

[Big Buckin' Longhorn]

Hmm, I have never heard the "whole phrase." Ever. (I will be 39 in about 2 weeks. Am I too young? Please, let me be too young! :tongue_smilie: )

 

I'm 38 and I've heard it many times. Guys used to say it all the time in college. Maybe it's a regional thing? :D

 

I'm older than cindergretta, and I've never heard the whole phrase either. WHO would say such a thing?

 

But I have been known to say something sucks, you know . . . when something is just that darn sucky . . . but not often. ;)

[Mrs Mungo]

I say "that sucks," but I will say "that stinks" around some people because I know it bothers some people.

[DianeW88]

Doesn't bother me.

[angela in ohio]

I'm older than cindergretta, and I've never heard the whole phrase either. WHO would say such a thing?

 

See, that's what's funny. :tongue_smilie: I think the same thing when someone just says the first word. Maybe that gives people insight into why some people are offended by it.

[*********]

I don't say it, I don't like it, and I would never let my kids say it.

 

If one of my friends said it all the time, I'd be cringing. A lot. Once in a while, no biggie. But if it was their go-to phrase? That'd get old quick.

[happi duck]

I've always heard that it is offensive because at first it wasn't just "s*cks" but "s*cks **add body part here**".

 

 

This is why I don't like this phrase - I'm old enough to have heard the full phrase quite a bit before the abbreviated phrase became popular - and now, of course, can't get the full phrase out of my head... :tongue_smilie:

 

Anne

 

:iagree:

[TheReader]

Hmmm, okay, thanks everyone.

 

I didn't realize it had been discussed before; I'll look that up. And I've also never heard the full phrase, that definitely puts a different connotation to it.

 

I will say, it's not my go-to phrase or anything, but it slips out here or there sometimes (and I definitely avoid most other foul language) I was just really wondering, especially in light of the one friend who barely reacted to F*CK in a note written by her son, but then really admonished him when he let slip "aww, that sucks!"

 

Made me wonder if the phrase was worse than I realized (and I guess I'm hearing that for some, it is).

[AHASRADA]

I'm older than cindergretta, and I've never heard the whole phrase either. WHO would say such a thing? ;)

 

Teenaged boys were known to say such things when I was in HS, in hallways, on the bus, etc. My mind doesn't usually go there when I hear someone say it, but I am aware of the origin enough to realize it is not appropriate in formal conversation.

[BMW]

We raised our kids without cussing... by us or by them... and we didn't use that term. But, it caught on by someone from somewhere and it was really bugging me and not my dh (ex)... and so he started saying "That blows-backwards" (meaning that sucks). So, my kids started saying "That blows backwards"!!! We got some very interesting looks...

 

Nowadays if that's the only thing they say when they get frustrated, I am fine with it... since they have had to be in ps, they hear much worse and I've caught them saying much worse.

 

As in most things, I just let them know that our words have meaning and represent who we are. I try to set a good example.

[Laurie4b]

This is partly a generational thing. I have gotten used to it, but when I was growing up, it was definitely not something that one said. It referred to a sex act.

[GoVanGogh]

I don't say it, I don't like it, and I would never let my kids say it.

 

If one of my friends said it all the time, I'd be cringing. A lot. Once in a while, no biggie. But if it was their go-to phrase? That'd get old quick.

:iagree:

I think it makes the person saying it come across as uneducated.

In the right context, it might come across as funny. But if the person used it on a regular basis? No.

 

This is partly a generational thing. I have gotten used to it, but when I was growing up, it was definitely not something that one said. It referred to a sex act.

Exactly.

 

On a somewhat related note. We were at a shark exhibit at a science museum over the weekend and their gift shop was full of T-shirts that said, "Bite Me!" with an up-close photo of a shark's mouth. DH and I were both shocked that they had children and baby size shirts with that phrase. :glare:

[SweetMissMagnolia]

if in doubt say it only at home.....doesn't bother me-LOL heard Granny say it recently LOL