Harriet Vane Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 (edited) Let's say someone is getting married to a lovely woman with a wonderful 7yo son. Let's say that person's sister is coming from another state for the wedding. She will be in town for two full weeks. Out-of-state Sister's son's birthday is the day before the wedding (9yo). Sister thinks it's important to celebrate the birthday ON the ACTUAL day of the birthday. Sister says it can be kept simple, but can the family please do a little something for her son ON his ACTUAL birthday? She envisions cake and games after school that day. Or, if there is no rehearsal dinner (something no one knows just yet) perhaps a party can be had in the early evening? Older, bossier sister quietly expresses concern for how busy that day will be not only for the bride and groom, but also for the other family members who will naturally be involved with the wedding. Older sister is concerned for how crazed and stressful it will be to have a party the day before the wedding. Out-of-town sister feels hurt at older sister's concerns. So--are out-of-town sister's hopes for a party reasonable? Should older, bossier sister just shut up about it? Older Bossier Sister doesn't want to hurt anyone and wishes she'd kept her trap shut even though she tried so hard to be sweet about it. ETA FURTHER CLARIFICATION--No one objects to singing to the birthday boy or making him feel special on his special day. No one objects to having a party on any other day of Out-of-Town Sister's visit. The objection is to a PARTY on the day before the wedding. Guests would be the bride and groom's son, Older Bossy Sister's two kids (one in particular being key to birthday boy's fun), Other Younger Sister's three kids (Other Younger Sister is also a bridesmaid in the wedding), and possibly five extra cousins. All of the invitees live 45 minutes from each other in different directions. The proposed venue for the party is Other Younger Sister's house, which is a solid hour or more from the wedding site. I personally do not know the bride well so have no idea if there will be a rehearsal dinner or the bride's family culture or bride's organizational abilities. Out-of-State Sister's plan is for Other Younger Sister to pick up her own kids and the Bride's kid from school, and then all the kids meet at Other Younger Sister's house for games and cake, "just for a little while." Older Bossy Sister is more than willing to throw as big a party as necessary at her own expense and in her own home or anywhere else Out-of-State Sister wants. Older Bossy Sister loves her nephew, wants to lavish him with attention, and has no objection to a great party. Nor does Older Bossy Sister object to smaller measures to make her nephew feel special on his birthday. Older Bossy Sister is just concerned about an actual party, however short, on the day before the wedding, especially since said party will involve one Bridesmaid (Other Younger Sister) and kids as well as the Bride's son. Logistically it seems difficult at best. Edited November 23, 2011 by strider Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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