Does this bride costume profoundly disturb anyone?

[KidsHappen]

:confused: I am not even sure what would be disturbing about it. It didn't look inappropriate so I am assuming it is the concept that bothers you? Girls having been playing at being brides since time immemorial. I have five dds. They had boxes of dress clothes and halloween costumes in which they could be just about anything they wanted to be. It has gotten a lot of use over the years and I can wait to have granddds to dig through it. :001_smile:

[Rosie_0801]

I think it would be more weird if my kids were playing defacto, and that's coming from a woman in a defacto relationship!

 

:lol:

Rosie

[LaissezFaire]

What is disturbing about pretend? On any given day around here someone is dressed as something fantastical. I would never pay that price though.

[abbeyej]

No. I don't really encourage "wedding" play (by buying stuff), but I don't care if the kids appropriate things from around the house to play wedding on occasion. Dd's white flower-girl dress (as someone said, more like a first communion type dress than a wedding dress) from my brother's wedding eventually found its way to the dress-up bin to live with the pirate, cowboy, Renaissance princess, Egyptian pharoah, knight, and other costume pieces. And yep, my kids have stuffed dolls and stuffed animals up their shirts and then "given birth" to them. lol.

 

(Now, I suppose if there were something marketed to play "pregnant mommy", it would disturb me more than kids spontaneously playing at giving birth to a stuffed puppy hidden under their shirts...)

 

The only problem I have with really *encouraging* wedding play (by buying fancy costumes, etc) would be that *some* women get totally caught up in the fantasy of planning a "fairy tale" wedding all of their lives -- to the detriment of looking for a good, caring, hard-working, kind, devoted husband and to the detriment of economic sense. But for most girls, I think playing at wedding is a temporary interest, much like all of the other fantasy play in which they engage (whether fairy princess or veterinarian or pirate), and just part of growing up and exploring the world around them.

[Laurie4b]

No--I think it's lovely. I loved to dress up as a child and my favorite was a bridesmaid dress in my grandmother's attic. I gave our nieces boxes of second-hand dress up clothes one Christmas. They were adorable.

[SquirrellyMama]

What is disturbing about pretend? On any given day around here someone is dressed as something fantastical. I would never pay that price though.

 

I'm not the OP but I don't know if she meant pretend weddings are disturbing or buying this costume is disturbing. I let my kids pretend to get married but I wouldn't buy or make a pretend wedding dress. My kids pretend all the time, that isn't a problem. I do have a problem with buying or making a wedding dress for a child. They can use towels for veils and a white coat for a dress.

[babysparkler]

The price is disturbing!

 

When we played house and there was to be a wedding, our bride got nothing more than a dish towel on her head for a veil, and a handful of wilting dandelions for her bouquet.

 

I don't find the idea of little girls pretending to get married disturbing at all, if that's what you mean.

:iagree:

[Orthodox6]

I'm not the OP but I don't know if she meant pretend weddings are disturbing or buying this costume is disturbing. I let my kids pretend to get married but I wouldn't buy or make a pretend wedding dress. My kids pretend all the time, that isn't a problem. I do have a problem with buying or making a wedding dress for a child. They can use towels for veils and a white coat for a dress.

 

:iagree: When our eldest was 4 years old, he loved to dress up as a[n Orthodox] priest. He tucked a towel down his shirtback to serve as vestments, and splashed everybody within sight using a toilet brush to simulate blessing of the people with holy water. I hardly would have spent several hundred dollars to buy him "real-looking" vestments ! :)

 

(Foreshadowing held firm, though. Same son now is 23-1/2, getting married in August, and determined to receive ordination into the diaconate.)

[BikeBookBread]

:iagree: When our eldest was 4 years old, he loved to dress up as a[n Orthodox] priest. He tucked a towel down his shirtback to serve as vestments, and splashed everybody within sight using a toilet brush to simulate blessing of the people with holy water. I hardly would have spent several hundred dollars to buy him "real-looking" vestments ! :)

 

(Foreshadowing held firm, though. Same son now is 23-1/2, getting married in August, and determined to receive ordination into the diaconate.)

 

This is A GREAT story! (I hope that toilet brush was special purchase for the purpose of dress up! :001_huh: :lol:)

[Orthodox6]

This is A GREAT story! (I hope that toilet brush was special purchase for the purpose of dress up! :001_huh: :lol:)

 

Nope. He grabbed it from his yiayia's bathroom. :tongue_smilie:

[lionfamily1999]

Nope. He grabbed it from his yiayia's bathroom. :tongue_smilie:

Tell me that once he's ordained (if I used the wrong word, I'm terribly sorry) you're going to buy him a toilet brush as a present ;)

[WagsWife]

I guess I don't get it. The way the OP was worded, I expected to see a toddler version of this...

 

http://chateaudelu.blogspot.com/2009/03/irish-traveller-update_12.html

 

I am always amazed when people are opposed to allowing little girls to be what they are...little girls!

 

My girls love superheros, army men, light-sabers, ect...and have had all these and more for toys. They could shame any boy with their knowledge superhero comics, video games, and new and old cars. But they always went back to their faves...baby dolls and dress up. What is wrong with that?

 

I had a friend who thought it was terrible that I allowed my girls to wear pink and bought them dolls. When her daughters were at my house, they always would want to play with the kitchen and the baby dolls...she flat out, would not let them. I. just. don't. get. it!

[MamaBearTeacher]

Is there a groom costume too?:001_smile: How many have little boys who dress up as grooms for fun? (unless they are made to by their sisters or female friends)

 

In any case, I don't know if I think it's a big deal. I never dressed up as a bride or pregnant woman as a child but I did put oranges in my shirt:glare: Yikes!

[ciyates]

Having only a boy we did not have pretty dresses, but I have lots of pics of him as Batman, a knight, a pirate, and some kinda Luke Skywalker thing.

 

My sister and used to wear my dad's white dress shirts as long wedding dresses. Boy that got us into trouble! He would also give us all of his outdated business forms and we would play office.

 

I think dress up is fine.

 

Carrie

[Ravin]

I don't get spending that kind of money on a costume, and I dislike the Disney marketing--the only Disney dress-up dresses DD has had are a fairy one MIL gave her and a pink gown (forgot which princess) we got for a buck at a garage sale. I try and encourage her to see the movies as movies, not as things to emulate in real life, if that makes any sense.

 

That said, she does like playing "wedding" lately, and I cracked up when her step-cousin was over during Spring Break, and in order to get him to play wedding with her, they made it "Transformers wedding". :lol:

 

She told me in all seriousness that it was just pretend, though, and that when they played house the other day and her friend T and his brother A were both her husbands (I assume because A is insistent lately on not being a baby of any kind), that was just pretend, too--she's only going to marry T when she grows up, not her cousin or A.

 

She's been insisting (and T as well) on this betrothal for a year now. They've even made plans for a year abroad honeymoon after high school, and she's said she wants a modern wedding dress but T can wear garb if he wants (we're both SCA families). I'm hoping it holds long enough for me not to worry about her wanting to date in jr. high, and just remind her she can't legally marry until age 16 w/ parental consent. :tongue_smilie:

[swellmomma]

[Did you use toilet paper? My mom used to flip out when she'd find wads and wads of tp in my toy box from me playing veterinarian with my stuffies :p

 

Cotton balls, toilet paper and elmers white glue. My friend had had a cast on her arm so we knew we needed the cotton first so we would pull cotton balls apart then we would pretty much decoupage the toilet paper to the cotton we had wrapped around the barbie's leg. Once dry that "cast" was not coming off without the "dr" helping cut it off.

[swellmomma]

Yes, and pregnant/give birth Barbie?!?

 

 

 

I bought that barbie for dd when I was pregnant with Hunter. We still have it and she still thinks it is the coolest barbie ever.

 

I was just picking up dd's room and wasn't even thinking about all the ball gowns she has in her closet. She has always been in love with full length ball gowns. When my sister had time to sew she made a new one for dd each year for her birthday. Now I just buy her a new one when the rest don't fit anymore. So even if the cinderella dress was designed as a costume I would likely let her wear it as a regular dress.

 

I paid a lot for the girls to get matching, custom ordered petty skirts, and those are a bit more than what most people would allow for their girls. They are headed for the dress up box but the girls love them so they have been well worn already.

[lionfamily1999]

Cotton balls, toilet paper and elmers white glue. My friend had had a cast on her arm so we knew we needed the cotton first so we would pull cotton balls apart then we would pretty much decoupage the toilet paper to the cotton we had wrapped around the barbie's leg. Once dry that "cast" was not coming off without the "dr" helping cut it off.

:lol: memories!

I bought that barbie for dd when I was pregnant with Hunter. We still have it and she still thinks it is the coolest barbie ever.

 

I was just picking up dd's room and wasn't even thinking about all the ball gowns she has in her closet. She has always been in love with full length ball gowns. When my sister had time to sew she made a new one for dd each year for her birthday. Now I just buy her a new one when the rest don't fit anymore. So even if the cinderella dress was designed as a costume I would likely let her wear it as a regular dress.

 

I paid a lot for the girls to get matching, custom ordered petty skirts, and those are a bit more than what most people would allow for their girls. They are headed for the dress up box but the girls love them so they have been well worn already.

I had the Heart Family, but my mom wouldn't get me the preggers barbie...

 

It's so good (imo) that you can give them that. Those princess memories last forever (and who doesn't love spinning in a skirt that flairs out around you????).

[Smithie]

" i find the bratz dolls and trashy clothes that they make for little girls far more disturbing. i would much rather my daughter dream about getting married than about modeling herself after a slutty girl-star."

 

:iagree:

 

Playing princess doesn't bother me. Playing bride doesn't bother me. Playing mommy doesn't bother me.

 

Here are some things that make me want to vomit:

 

1. the wall hanging I saw in a little girl's room, that said "My prince did come. His name is Daddy."

 

2. Purity balls.

 

3. Guardian of Purity necklaces

 

 

UUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

[scrapbookbuzz]

I don't find the costume itself disturbing. The price, yes.

 

However, more and more, I'm of the mind that society as a whole overemphasizes the wedding experience without giving much thought to the actual marriage, on which so much more education should be given!

 

In the land of dress up, though, there's nothing wrong with using a remnant of white satin and a dish towel to pretend to be a bride. No one said the costume has to look exactly like my $600 wedding dress! :^)

[Mrs Mungo]

I don't find anything disturbing about little girls playing dress-up in a bride costume, any more than a princess costume or a mermaid costume. Why is pretending to be a bride more disturbing than pretending to be a mother and playing with baby dolls? :confused:

 

:iagree: We had a dress-up box (a huge one) when my kids were little that had everything from a bride outfit to a SWAT costume. So....*shrug*.

 

Little girls were pretending to be brides long before there were actual costumes.

[Slartibartfast]

I totally put a slip on my head but my family watched SNL so I might have seen Judy Miller :lol:

[amydavis]

i find the bratz dolls and trashy clothes that they make for little girls far more disturbing. i would much rather my daughter dream about getting married than about modeling herself after a slutty girl-star.

 

:iagree:

I haven't read all the posts yet, but I wanted to concur with this one.

We absolutely don't do the Bratz toys. But I have no problem with children playing dress up, pretending to get married, etc. It's a wonderful part of childhood. I believe that adults often "over-think" and over-analyze, thereby making something into so much more than it truly is. It's okay to pretend. It's okay to be curious about being a grown-up, a mommy, a firefighter, an astronaut, a paramedic, a teacher, a bride, etc...

Just my .02.

[Sahamamama]

I have three little girls (3, 3, and 5 years old). They all LOVE to play "dress up" or "costumes," as they call it. Most of the "stuff" in the box is hand-me down costumes from my sister. These are some of the items in the box:

 

• Cinderella dress (light blue and sparkly)
  
• Sleeping Beauty dress (light pink and sparkly)
  
• Snow White dress (blue, yellow, white, red and SHINY)
  
• Rainbow Fairy Princess dress (that's what they call it!)
  
• Lavender Fairy Princess dress (ditto)
  
• Shiny Peach Fairy Princess dress (I have adorable children)
  
• White and Gold Fairy Princess dress (this looks like a wedding dress :confused: It has a "veil." I don't know, I didn't buy it, but I think it's meant to look like a wedding gown. Not a problem, really. Just part of the box.)
  
• Clown costume (white with multi-colored polka dots)
  
• Cowboy boots, cowboy hat, jeans, bandanna
  
• Nurse's cape and "doctor kit" (with a girl doctor doll) :)
  
• A bright blue feather boa. I hate this thing. It sheds. :tongue_smilie:
  

[KrissiK]

I had one dress-up dress as a child - a green taffeta and tulle full skirted bridesmaid dress my mother wore once. That dress was used every day for about 5 years. It was the best thing I ever had. I see nothing wrong with the dress in the ad, other than the fact that it's obviously a wedding dress. Doesn't leave room for much imagination. My green dress, otoh was a wedding dress, a Mary Poppins dress, a ball gown and anything else I wanted it to be. Toys that are too well defined don't give children enough room to be imaginiative.

[WishboneDawn]

I don't find the idea of a play wedding dress disturbing but I do find the way Disney markets to kids disturbing. It seems to have a strategy of defining genders and age groups into very narrow but easily advertised to segments liek "Princess" or Hannah Montana. As a kid exits one very narrow and and carefully crafted "interest like the Princess line Disney has another "interest" ready to catch them and their dollars.

[LaissezFaire]

" i find the bratz dolls and trashy clothes that they make for little girls far more disturbing. i would much rather my daughter dream about getting married than about modeling herself after a slutty girl-star."

 

:iagree:

 

Playing princess doesn't bother me. Playing bride doesn't bother me. Playing mommy doesn't bother me.

 

Here are some things that make me want to vomit:

 

1. the wall hanging I saw in a little girl's room, that said "My prince did come. His name is Daddy."

 

2. Purity balls.

 

3. Guardian of Purity necklaces

 

 

UUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

OH I agree with this 100%. Those things really creep me out. I had never seen that necklace but it makes me nauseous.

[Night Elf]

Hmm.. some of you sound so disgusted at the thought that someone would pay that. I've paid that for princess dresses for my daughters. They got as much enjoyment from those dresses as my son got from his Lego kits that cost the same and more. I understand that some people consider such purchases to be a luxury and expensive, but I don't think it's fair to condemn those of us who have no problems paying those prices.

 

Ironically, my dd17 was just reminiscing this morning about a particular princess dress she had that I purchased from the Disney Store when she was 5 years old. She wore that dress everywhere. It was well worth the price to me. I don't see why her memory is any less special than someone else who had a homemade costume.

[hsbaby]

Well, since my son already "married" our neighbor girls back when they were 5 or so, I find little girls wanting to dress up like this totally normal. My youngest (almost 3) is constantly in some type of dress up costume and would probably love to dress up in this as well.

[lionfamily1999]

Hmm.. some of you sound so disgusted at the thought that someone would pay that. I've paid that for princess dresses for my daughters. They got as much enjoyment from those dresses as my son got from his Lego kits that cost the same and more. I understand that some people consider such purchases to be a luxury and expensive, but I don't think it's fair to condemn those of us who have no problems paying those prices.

 

Ironically, my dd17 was just reminiscing this morning about a particular princess dress she had that I purchased from the Disney Store when she was 5 years old. She wore that dress everywhere. It was well worth the price to me. I don't see why her memory is any less special than someone else who had a homemade costume.

:grouphug: I killed the other thread responding to you :p

 

I don't think they (at least the ones I read) were attacking people that pay that much, so much as saying they would never pay that much.

 

Lol, my poor kids are stuck with remnants and whatever we can spare from around the house, not because I'm crafty, but because I can't afford to indulge in... ok well the boys don't want pretty princess stuff, but I guess... what, full realistic military gear, or cop costumes... We do have a UPS shirt and managers coat the boys enjoy :lol:

[Saille]

...

[KidsHappen]

OH I agree with this 100%. Those things really creep me out. I had never seen that necklace but it makes me nauseous.

 

Well, I thought the necklace was cute until I read the description which I found positively alarming. When I first saw the necklace I was thinking something along the lines of the bff necklaces, the girl would wear the locket and give the key to her beloved. I could see that being romantic in a teen sort of way. My mind doesn't even want to go where the description leads. :001_huh:

[elegantlion]

I'm only offended because it has glitter. :tongue_smilie:

[teamturner]

This dress is beautiful. When my dd 8 was younger she wanted a white dress so I found a flower girl type dress w/lots of satin, lace, and netting from Marshalls for $15. It was originally $65. I already had a veil that my mil made for her. She loved it for dress up!

[Dina in Oklahoma]

The price is disturbing!

 

When we played house and there was to be a wedding, our bride got nothing more than a dish towel on her head for a veil, and a handful of wilting dandelions for her bouquet.

 

I don't find the idea of little girls pretending to get married disturbing at all, if that's what you mean.

 

 

Ditto! :lol:

[Jenny in GA]

Hmm.. some of you sound so disgusted at the thought that someone would pay that. I've paid that for princess dresses for my daughters.

 

Oh, I wasn't digusted at the idea that someone would pay that. I just thought that I would not pay it myself. My kids loved dress-up, but we got almost all the costumes as hand-me-downs, or for a couple bucks used, or as gifts.

 

Jenny

[TheCoffeeChick]

 

Here are some things that make me want to vomit:

 

1. the wall hanging I saw in a little girl's room, that said "My prince did come. His name is Daddy."

 

2. Purity balls.

 

3. Guardian of Purity necklaces

 

 

UUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

 

 

 

:confused::001_huh::blink::eek::ack2:

 

 

EEEEEEEEWWWWWWW!!!!

[mommaduck]

" i find the bratz dolls and trashy clothes that they make for little girls far more disturbing. i would much rather my daughter dream about getting married than about modeling herself after a slutty girl-star."

 

:iagree:

 

Playing princess doesn't bother me. Playing bride doesn't bother me. Playing mommy doesn't bother me.

 

Here are some things that make me want to vomit:

 

1. the wall hanging I saw in a little girl's room, that said "My prince did come. His name is Daddy."

 

2. Purity balls.

 

3. Guardian of Purity necklaces

 

 

UUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

:iagree:

[Wheres Toto]

Playing princess doesn't bother me. Playing bride doesn't bother me. Playing mommy doesn't bother me.

 

Here are some things that make me want to vomit:

 

1. the wall hanging I saw in a little girl's room, that said "My prince did come. His name is Daddy."

 

2. Purity balls.

 

3. Guardian of Purity necklaces

 

 

UUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

 

 

Okay, that necklace is just creepy on so many levels. Besides the whole - a women is under the control of her father until she is given over to her husband - bit, its just so wrong.

 

The wall hanging implies something pretty gross as well.

[Wheres Toto]

As for the original thread - I have no problem with the dress-up. My oldest had a few of the Disney outfits when she was young but far more old dance costumes (she's been dancing for 12 years now) or dresses Grandma made. We have a dress up box with mostly hats (cowboy, construction), beads, bracelets, and a few animal costumes grandma made. We have two Cinderella dresses we won when my oldest was in the play at her high school.

 

But, my little girl prefers to run around in nothing but a pull-up. We go through multiple outfits and pairs of socks each day because she takes them off and we can't find them when its time to go out.:tongue_smilie:

[Ravin]

I don't find the idea of a play wedding dress disturbing but I do find the way Disney markets to kids disturbing. It seems to have a strategy of defining genders and age groups into very narrow but easily advertised to segments liek "Princess" or Hannah Montana. As a kid exits one very narrow and and carefully crafted "interest like the Princess line Disney has another "interest" ready to catch them and their dollars.

 

Wanted to reiterate how much I detest kids' marketing across the board just about. There's a big display for How to Train Your Dragon (from Dreamworks) at Wal Mart right now. Very cool--except even though one of the gang of Viking kids is a girl, there is Not. One. Item. that isn't boy marketed. Boy shoes, boy pj's, boy T-shirts...none for girls. DD did like the skateboards, and I thought the backpack with a matching lunchbox that looked like a center-grip round shield was totally cool, but...c'mon couldn't they have put the girl on ONE LOUSY SHIRT???

[Crimson Wife]

 

Here are some things that make me want to vomit:

 

1. the wall hanging I saw in a little girl's room, that said "My prince did come. His name is Daddy."

 

The wall hanging implies something pretty gross as well.

 

Substitute "Christ" for "Daddy" and I would buy it. But the way it's written :ack2:

[Rosie_0801]

It's so good (imo) that you can give them that. Those princess memories last forever (and who doesn't love spinning in a skirt that flairs out around you????).

 

Argh! I'm still regretting the loss of a fantastic, swirly dress up skirt. It'd probably fit me perfectly now! And you know what? It was a frightening orange and brown, with braid and sequins and I would wear it everywhere if I still had it!

 

:lol:

Rosie- who really ought to make her daughter a swirly skirt

[LibraryLover]

I have two dds who have never wanted to do the fancy fairy/princess/bride thing. (Horse gals). They have promised that if they have daughters who like that sort of thing, I have their permission to buy anything they want and I am free to do the whole Princess deal at Magic Kingdom. (Shame on me). I don't care what it costs. If my 10 yr old wanted any princess dress at MK, I'd buy it. (we are in FL). I think those girls look like they are having so much fun. I can buy that stuff, but nobody in my family wants any of it. Very messed up. ;) lol

Edited March 27, 2010 by LibraryLover

[jazzyfizzle]

I pretended my barbies were getting married all the time when I was a kid. My grandmother would even play the Hawaiian Wedding March on piano as my barbies tied the knot. LOL All I had to dress up in was my mom vintage yellow prom dress...I would have loved to have a real "wedding" dress. There are also pictures of me "marrying" my neighbor when I was 5. (P.S. I didn't marry him in real life).

 

LOL Ours too. Our 'mini' Barbie (now I will spend a fair amount of time looking for the name of that doll :D ) she also had other 'guys' in addition to her Ken.. she had a guy that was a train aka 'Trainy' and a guy that was a plane.. aka 'Planey' and another one that I think was a car.

Went on extensive dates with all of them. She really got around. :D

(My sister would flip at me posting this on a public message board) heee

 

 

I also think it is ok as long as included with other role-play 'roles'.

[jazzyfizzle]

:w00t: Oy, what the heck are purity balls? Now I have to go google...

 

Afraid to look..

[ereks mom]

Playing princess doesn't bother me. Playing bride doesn't bother me. Playing mommy doesn't bother me.

 

Here are some things that make me want to vomit:

 

1. the wall hanging I saw in a little girl's room, that said "My prince did come. His name is Daddy."

 

2. Purity balls.

 

3. Guardian of Purity necklaces

 

UUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

 

Okay, that necklace is just creepy on so many levels. Besides the whole - a women is under the control of her father until she is given over to her husband - bit, its just so wrong.

 

The wall hanging implies something pretty gross as well.

 

:001_huh: I think the sentiment is sweet -- in the right context. I don't like the idea of the Purity Ball; making girls' personal, private choices a public event bothers me. I also find the wall hanging disturbing.

Edited March 27, 2010 by ereks mom

[Starr]

We went to Disney Land just before dd turned 4. One of my favorite pictures is her with her new Cinderella gown on over her clothes, passed out in her brothers stroller with a pacifier in her mouth. She just loved seeing all the "Disney Girls" and can still remember who wasn't there.

[MariannNOVA]

No, not really. I think many little girls like to play wedding.

 

What I do find disturbing are those photographs of children dressed as adults, in oversized suites and dresses, kissing. I know a lot of people think they're cute, but they make me shudder.

 

:iagree:

[OnTheBrink]

(I should quote whoever mentioned pregnant Barbie. But, I just got home from work and I'm too lazy to go back and find it)

 

I predate Pregnant Barbie, but my Barbies definitely gave birth. I use to have The Sunshine Family dolls, which had a baby. The SF dolls were shorter than Barbies, so those dolls became teenagers and Barbie took their baby and gave birth to it. On the Barbie Ocean Liner.

 

I also had a Mrs. Beasley doll, but she never gave birth.