How do you think homeschool parents should be teaching lessons?

[Kfamily]

Do you think homeschool parents should be teaching lessons or setting up lessons so that the child can do them independently or a little of both? I do realize that as children approach high school they should be gaining some independence but how much?

 

I'm feeling a little perplexed by this so I thought I would like some other opinions in case I'm not seeing something I should. We are friends with a family and they have great kids. One of their dds is friends with my dd and we have known them a long time. They expect a lot of independence from their kids. In fact, I know another family (again one of dd's friends that she has known for a long time) that also expect a lot of independence from their kids. I mean independent as in they set up the student's curricula and they arrange dvds and classes, etc. but leave them to carry out the actual work alone. In both examples, both moms didn't check up on their child's work in math only to find that there were whole concepts completely misunderstood and needed to be redone. I guess I can see independence with subjects such as history or literature but how whole math books can be done entirely alone by 4th, 5th and 6th graders is hard for me to understand. The former mom has her dds (ages 13 and 14) doing Henle Latin together but without her involvement at all. I know there are differences in children and some of them may be able to handle this but I worry they are having too much expected of them.

Just today another mom posted for help (within our local yahoo group) and asked for curricula advice but quickly follows this with the statement that she really doesn't have time to teach the child. I assume she wants curricula to carry this out for her.

I guess I worry this is a slippery slope. I have a degree in Elem. Educ. so children and education are my passion. I truly want to see all children being educated in the best way possible for them.

I have been a lurker/light poster for almost 4 years and I usually stay away from the General Board (this board gets a little to hot for me:D)! I truly don't want to see this question turned upside down. I love children and know that most parents love their children and want the best for them. I know we (parents) do this in different ways so I am not passing judgement. I can't stand it when that happens to me so I wouldn't do that to others. I really am concerned about this and am only seeking calm opinions and rational advice. I want to understand this better as I may be missing something. I do know the first two families very well but could never tell them my concerns outright. Thankfully, in both cases, the moms did catch this and have made some changes.

Just wondering what others think about this.....

Is there a middle ground and how do you keep to it?

I respect everyone's opinion here so please be nice!:001_smile: I like being nice!:D

Edited June 19, 2009 by Kfamily

[Cedarmom]

It depends on student and parent. Some children are self motivators andareable to work more indepenently. But no matter how independant they are,I think the work needs to be checked at least once a week. Otherwise it's too much temptation for the student to not do work or do it halfheartedly.

[Impish]

Different things work for different families. Different children have different needs. Personally, I'd be a bit taken aback with a homeschooling parent announcing that they have no time to teach, because I consider homeschooling to be my job and therefore demanding of time.

 

Diva required very little assistance in her math, only asked questions occasionally. By reading the examples given, she did her work and that was it. She didn't need me to teach her lessons at all. As far as math went for grade 4-5, she did sit with the curric and accomplish it without much parental guidance at all. She simply didn't need it, except for the few days here and there when sudden onset of pre-adolescent amnesia set in :glare:

[Rosy]

I think different methods work for different kids/families. My just-turned-3rd grader does her work almost entirely independently, including math. If she's beginning a difficult concept or if she has questions, I'll talk her through things, but honestly that's pretty rare. I'll look over her shoulder to make sure she's getting the right answers.

 

My son (just-turned-2nd grade) needs me sitting right next to him every step of the way. I can't leave the room while he's doing school.

 

I do think you can go to an extreme where the parent isn't providing any instruction/oversight AT ALL, and that would be detrimental to a child's education. But I do think you can spoon feed and that isn't any better. Some kids are good at figuring things out on their own and get more out of their education that way, and some kids need to process with another person and need more guidance. In the fall we'll do SOTW, science and Bible together.

 

To be honest, by 4th grade I do expect that my kids will be working mostly independently. And possibly even helping instruct the younger ones. One of my goals is for them to be independent thinkers and learners, and to pursue their own passions. I see my role as more of a facilitator (getting them what they need and making sure they're on track with required subjects) and coach/encourager. I do have expectations that must be met, but I expect that they'll be able to do them mostly independently.

[Loupelou]

I would have to agree with other posters. Needs vary from family to family and child to child. Also different subjects can require more or less time on the parents' part. I have a math student who needs very little if any help and another who needs some guidance almost every day. All of mine have daily checklists, assignments are turned in weekly. But, that is how I am doing it and I wouldn't presume to decide what is best for anther family.:001_smile:

[bkpan]

I agree with the others. There is no approach that is best for all children. As the mom of 6 I can tell you that some of my dc need me sitting next to them hand-holding more often, and others are very independent and have shown themselves responsible in their work. And, sometimes that shifts. And I have to regularly readjust my expectations as my dc grow and change. It is not a one-size-fits-all solution.

 

I assume that your dds friends moms are doing the best they can. It sounds as if they found that they needed to adjust their expectations and did just that. I wouldnt worry about their dc. You sound as if you have found a good balance for your dd. HTH!

 

Kim

[Rosy]

I can see this both ways. On one hand, if you're too busy to give you're kids a quality education, you're too busy. Teaching has to be at the top of the priority list for a homeschooler. On the other hand, I will lean toward curricula that doesn't require a lot of me. I have 4 kids, and I can't sit down with each of them individually for 2 hours a day and get anything done around the house, much less be a good wife and keep my own sanity. If it was necessary, I would do something more labor-intensive...but I avoid those curricula when I can.

 

Maybe your friend just meant that she needs something low maintenance or with a DVD option or something along those lines.

[MIch elle]

Do you think homeschool parents should be teaching lessons or setting up lessons so that the child can do them independently or a little of both? I do realize that as children approach high school they should be gaining some independence but how much?

 

I know there are differences in children and some of them may be able to handle this but I worry they are having too much expected of them.

 

I guess I worry this is a slippery slope. I have a degree in Elem. Educ. so children and education are my passion. I truly want to see all children being educated in the best way possible

Just wondering what others think about this.....

Is there a middle ground and how to you keep to it?

I respect everyone's opinion here so please be nice!:001_smile: I like being nice!:D

 

I believe that my dc benefit from discussing, reading together or being directly taught each and every subject by ME or another competent instructor. That teaching may take 5 minutes or 20 minutes but I TEACH my dc (now only 12yob), and THEN they do independent work in several subjects after we've done with the teaching part (with reading it may be after they read).

 

I DON'T agree with independent study the way many homeschooler practice it. BUT it's THEIR family and they will do what they think is best; I may not agree but it's not mine to say unless asked.

 

I've had fellow homeschoolers insist that I SHOULD let my dc teach themselves (it's better for them - BLAH, BLAH, BLAH) and I DON'T like it when I'm being told how to homeschool my dc!!! :tongue_smilie:

[ereks mom]

Personally, I'd be a bit taken aback with a homeschooling parent announcing that they have no time to teach, because I consider homeschooling to be my job and therefore demanding of time.

 

 

:iagree:

 

I always teach math. To me, it's one of those subjects that just cries out for working some at least some problems together before handing it off to the dc to do on his own. This is especially true for younger kids.

 

I knew one of those moms who just handed her kids an assignment list every Monday and expected them to teach themselves, with her just checking the work later -- sometimes WEEKS later. And I'm talking about grammar stage kids here, and BJU math, which is NOT set up at all for self-teaching! Each day, her poor math-phobic (and somewhat lazy) dd would go through that day's assigned workbook pages and do a few problems, skipping the ones she "couldn't do". She didn't ask for help; she just left them blank. By the end of the week, she had learned NONE of the concepts and done only a few problems from each lesson. The mom didn't find out until a few weeks later when she sat down to check math lessons. :001_huh:

[Dobela]

I think it depends on the family, but unless the child is sending in work to an academy for grading, I can't imagine being completely hands off in my child's education. DVDs are fine (or self guided workbooks or whatever), but if you don't have time to look over work occassionally to make certain concepts are learned, then you don't need to be homeschooling.

[Impish]

Diva would rather just get her math done than listen to me talk about it. :glare: In the time it takes me to explain what she's doing in the work that am, she could have most of it done. Smarty pants brat :tongue_smilie:

[orangearrow]

I am currently setting things up so that my almost-6th grader can do nearly everything on her own. I will, however, always be checking up on her work, making sure she is still understanding concepts. She will also be reading reports to me, etc and I will be checking things like grammar, etc - and always available for questions.

 

My reasoning for this is: She gets things exceptionally fast. She has been slowed down by having to wait on me. :)

 

My dh was homeschooled and his mom let him have free reign at around this same age. BUT she didn't monitor things as well as HE would have liked (now, as a grown-up anyway - I'm sure he didn't mind a bit when he was a kid, lol). He blew through his books and was left with a lot of free time on his hands. So, I will definitely be making sure that she stays challenged. When she starts breezing through her work again, I know it's time to up the difficultly level again. ;)

 

My other two are just about to begin 4th and 1st grade. The 4th grader needs a LOT more hand-holding than her sister did at this age and the 1st grader... well, he's a 1st grader! LOL I definitely don't expect him to do much of anything on his own, really....

[Kfamily]

Thanks so much!! You all have been great! I think so much of the success of these questions has to do with the poster's attitude themselves. I haven't received very much feedback that supported what I was thinking at all but I opened this question with the intention of truly listening to another perspective. I have been given much to think about. I may try to see if there are other areas I can grow in as a teacher by allowing my dds to gain a little more independence. I can definitely agree with the idea that each child is different. My older dd is very needy but my younger is proving to be very independent. She tends to act as if I am insulting her intelligence if I don't let her do it herself. Already, she is a different child to educate altogether.

My concern with slippery slopes is that while the two families I used to illustrate this question are wonderful in many ways, they also have crossed over this imaginary line between independence and too much responsibility. I have seen the tension and weight on these children sometimes and it is that alone that concerns me.

Thanks so much for helping me work through this. I'm still thinking it through. You ladies and gentlemen are wonderful!:001_smile:

Edited June 19, 2009 by Kfamily

[Laura Corin]

A little of each works for us, with differences based on age and personality. Hobbes and I do most things together: he just sits down to do exercises on his own. Calvin does most of his work independently: I'm around for discussion sessions and to mark work.

 

Laura

[Jean in Newcastle]

My concern with slippery slopes is that while the two families I used to illustrate this question are wonderful in many ways, they also have crossed over this imaginary line between independence and too much responsibility. I have seen the tension and weight on these children sometimes and it is that alone that concerns me.

 

 

I've crossed over that imaginary line many times. I've asked a child to clean a horribly messy room and then found them sitting in a puddle of tears because they honestly were not able to deal with so much mess. Yes, I should have made rules to keep it from getting that way. And yes, I should have helped break down the job for them. And once I realized that I was expecting too much, I did so.

 

I think it is the same for these moms. They let their children have too much independence and then found that the kids weren't learning as well as they should. The question now, is what are they going to do about it? Are they going to institute a new system where they spend even 10 min. a day going over the math assignment together? Are they going to hire a tutor for them, if they truly don't have time to do that much with them? I think that is where it becomes a matter of responsible parenting - how we handle those times when we see those oops moments.

 

I read over your OP and I can't tell exactly what the original situation was. (And perhaps you as an outsider to the families don't totally know the entire situation?). But it appears that it may be that an entire year has gone on before they realized that the math was not being learned? In that case, the parents have not been good teachers. But again, it's time for them to decide what to do about it now, not to look back with regrets (though it might be helpful for us looking in to see what we could do not to fall into these same mistakes).

[dirty ethel rackham]

Like mentioned before, different needs for different families, different kids, different subjects and different levels of maturity.

 

In the early years, my kids get a lot of face-time teaching. Once my kids can read well on their own, they can start doing some things independently. It doen't mean I don't check in on them, but it means that I am not always sitting next to them doing giving instruction.

 

I am pretty hands off with my older kids (going into 10th and 8th grades) on some subjects. My boys have been self-teaching math since about 4th grade or so. It wasn't my intention, but I would put them off to go change a diaper or put my youngest down for nap and find that they had gone on without me. If their work showed that they needed more, they would have gotten it. I did make the mistake with my oldest to not check in more often and he got into a bind this year. It wasn't intentional, but life and health issues did get in the way and this area got less attention than it should have. So, I do have understanding for parents who make the mistake of giving their kids too much leeway. But too little can have detrimental effects as well and hamper their ability to work independently.

 

A good homeschooling parent learns to read their child, learn what they need, and, most importantly, learn from mistakes. I don't judge other homeschooling parents because I certainly would not want to be judged by my mistakes and failings. I've been around long enough to see families who did things very different from me send their children off to college (most with academic scholarships.) My goals are not only for academic excellence, but to raise physically, emotionally, and spiritually healthy adults.

[Desert Rat]

Hmmm...I think, with the age of my kids, we don't work much independently. I am working toward that goal, however, and hope that by the time they hit 8th or 9th grade much of their work will be done without my aid.

I don't think there is a right or wrong answer to this question and honestly I haven't read most of the other posts. I just do what works well for my boys.

My ds who's 9 hasn't worked much independently, but that's the kind of kid he is. He's always been very needy and required lots of attention. So for him working on his own is very difficult. What I do is assign a specific task and walk away to change the laundry and come back in 5 minutes to see how he's doing. I plan on increasing the time until he's comfortable.

My ds6 though, would rather just do it. Go away, Mom. I got this. :o)

It's good to have 2 different personalities in the house. LOL

HTH

[Heather in Neverland]

It is definitely a different mind-set. I taught in public schools for 11 years and have a master's degree in education. I was taught the "sage on the stage" philosophy of teaching. Now I consider myself more of a "guide on the side".

 

It took a while to grasp the idea that my kids could learn without me directing their every movement. In school kids are taught to dutifully sit in their desk, face forward, and listen to the wise teacher tell them everything they should know.

 

I want my kids to learn HOW to learn.

 

If you teach your child how to read, they can learn ANYTHING. I was like that as a child...an independent learner forced to sit in a mind-numbingly boring class and listen to the teacher go blah, blah, blah. And the same thing happened in college. All I really wanted was the book and someone to ask questions of if I had any.

 

I am working on my 2nd master's degree right now and I am doing classes online. I love it! They give me the books and assignments, I work at my own pace, I ask questions when I have them.

 

Example: my ds just finished up 5th grade. His history was Famous Men of Greece/Rome. He would read a story and answer questions about it (from Greenleaf press). Often, his writing assignment would be about that story. He did this all on his own. At dinner, we sit and talk all about the story he read as a family. I did not "instruct" him...I just gave him the information and let him have at it. And he was able to tell us all about what he read. In my book, that's learning.

 

He also did Henle Latin. He has had PL, LCI and LCII (on DVD) so he has a nice base of knowledge. He reads the information in Henle, does the practice exercises, checks his work against the key, redoes the ones he got wrong. He is learning Latin quite well and I don't know a lick of it.

 

Those are just a few examples. I enjoy watching him discover new things and I enjoy talking with him about his discoveries. It is a little humbling to realize that not only can they learn without you, they can even learn in spite of you. :D

 

p.s. that's also why I think the argument that a parent can't homeschool unless they have a teaching degree is ridiculous.

Edited June 20, 2009 by Heather in NC

[Lovedtodeath]

If you teach your child how to read, they can learn ANYTHING. I was like that as a child...an independent learner forced to sit in a mind-numbingly boring class and listen to the teacher go blah, blah, blah. And the same thing happened in college. All I really wanted was the book and someone to ask questions of if I had any.

That was me. School was a phenomenal waste of time. I just wanted to be left to get it done and read. When I started homeschooling at 15 yrs old I loved it. So much faster!

 

Some kids are not like this however. I have a sociable girl whom I doubt will change all that much in that respect.

[Hikin' Mama]

but I think homeschool parents should determine how they should teach lessons. I can't tell you how you should do it, and you can't tell me how I should do it, because we probably have different teaching styles, and our children probably have different learning styles. We also all have different life situations. All three of my kids are different and require different amounts of time with me, but I still like to be directly involved in their schooling each day, and I like to spend one-on-one time with them each day. I know people who give their kids their school work at the beginning of the school year and don't work with them at all, and their kids do well (high test scores, college scholarships), but that wouldn't work well for me. However, that doesn't mean that I think they should do it any differently.

 

I haven't read all the responses, but here's my 2 cents!

[johnandtinagilbert]

well, consistently, with joy and patience, and with the best interest of the student in mind, building towards total independence.

 

For us that means some independent study, some face time. A balance of needs, not a balance of time. Just today, I offered my two older boys a choice to do their science solo or sit with me while I read aloud to the younger "school." One hit the road with, "No offense, Mom. It'll take me less time if I do it by myself." and the other one, the older one at that, stayed put. He'd rather be read to any day. If the topic were math, they'd be reversed.

 

I think face time is necessary for foundational subjects, but once the basics are down, I believe in teaching, but I believe in allowing the student to show mastery independently. I teach, sometimes a DVD teaches, student thinks, writes, I evaluate, re-teach where necessary.

[amy g.]

I also have a teaching degree, and I have to do things differently with my different children.

 

My oldest works best with me beside her. She is getting better, but she still needs my help.

 

Because of this, I made poor Mr. Clever do group lessons longer than I should have. He was miserable waiting for everyone else to get ready and focus. He loves having a list and working through it alone.

 

Miss Beautiful could do her work alone, but since she is a typical middle child, she wants one on one time with me, I don't have her do that. This year, she is doing Sonlight Core 5. She can do her Math and Spelling and Typing alone, but she knows she will have me all to herself for read alouds.

 

Miss Bossy hasn't even turned 3 yet, and we do not sit down and try to teach her, but she can count to 20, and count to 50 by 10s, and knows all of her letter names and sounds and about 50 sight words. She learned it all just by daily life, so I doubt she is going to really need a ton of hand holding, but she likes to have an adult right there beside her at all times. She will probably receive a combination approach as well.

 

That is what I like about homeschooling. Each child can receive instruction in the manner that suits him best.

[Susan in TN]

I tend to favor the tutor/student model, where there is plenty of interaction and discussion, especially in the humanities. However, there are areas where students will ideally be able to complete basic assignments and do research independently and that's a gradual process.

[Ellie]

I don't have an opinion on how someone else "should" teach her own children.

 

I try not to be "concerned" over the way I perceive how someone else is teaching her children. Unless I see outright abuse, it's just not my business.

[LadyAberlin]

Well I was homeschooled and I was the type of student that you could give me the math text and I would do the lesson and then grade it myself and if i missed anything I would sit and look at it until I figured out what I did wrong. However I have had homeschool math students that I tutored that couldn't be trusted and they cheated or they wouldn't give the problems they missed a second glance. So it really depends on the kid. I think independence is good. Maybe not at elementary level, but starting little by little in jr high and then quite a bit in highschool.

[Peela]

Its a balancing act, but I realised long ago I needed to treat homeschooling as my full time job and not try to do anything, or have other commitments, during our homeschooling day.

My older is fairly independent, but still, she needs me to bounce off, for feedback, for inspiration, and for motivation.

My younger has always needed me a lot. This year heis more independent than any other- and he is 13. He can finally sit down a do a workbook page, and follow the instructions and do it ok, most of the time.

I found him an online maths program that "teaches" him (similar to TT), and its free now as well, and that has made the world of difference to our relationship and his independence. So has a male science teacher in a science class.

Ideally....I would like to teach even more than I do, but its not possible. Burn out for me. Clashing with them.

 

However, I do sometimes pick up that some mums just want the curricula to do all the work, and want the child to work independently...so that they can just go and do other things. In other words, they dont see homeschooling as their "job". I do see it as a full time commitment, but I still constantly try to find that balance between teaching and letting them be independent.

My experience is that if I dont mark their work for too long a gap, or I just let them do something without staying in tune with where they are at....sometimes, the whole subject ends up being a waste of time. The factor of me following what they are dong makes a big difference.

[joannqn]

I do something in the middle. My current two homeschoolers have been able to do most of their school work independently from K/1st grade on. Part of it is their academic abilities, part of it is discipline/expectations, part of it is the curriculum I choose. However, I am always available to teach or answer questions as needed, and I grade the work weekly to insure understanding. Some subjects I reserve for doing together, either all of us together, or just me and the one student. This is more for my benefit though. I want to do certain subjects because I'm interested in them or I don't want the kids to get ahead of what I know how to do, if I can help it.

 

It's always good to have some kind of way of knowing that they are doing and/or understanding the work. Accountability is good for everyone.

[HiddenJewel]

If I could go back and redo school with my older 2, I would teach them each subject. They would still do the work themselves but I would make sure I went over the new material with them. I have one dd who loves to work independently but doesn't always gain what she needs to from the lesson. Dd#1 would probably have been okay but she could have learned concepts to a deeper level had I been more involved. I found part way through elementary that the right answers could be gotten without true understanding of the concepts. That was a huge wake up call! I couldn't just monitor their progress by checking their work.

 

Even in a classroom high school or college there are lectures. Yes, there is reading outside of that. But the student is not expected to learn everything on their own unless it is a correspondence course.

[swellmomma]

I believe that my dc benefit from discussing, reading together or being directly taught each and every subject by ME or another competent instructor. That teaching may take 5 minutes or 20 minutes but I TEACH my dc (now only 12yob), and THEN they do independent work in several subjects after we've done with the teaching part (with reading it may be after they read).

 

I DON'T agree with independent study the way many homeschooler practice it. BUT it's THEIR family and they will do what they think is best; I may not agree but it's not mine to say unless asked.

 

I've had fellow homeschoolers insist that I SHOULD let my dc teach themselves (it's better for them - BLAH, BLAH, BLAH) and I DON'T like it when I'm being told how to homeschool my dc!!! :tongue_smilie:

 

ITA :iagree:

[LivingHope]

I think independence does not have to mean no accountability.

 

We have a mix of subjects in our home that are independently learned. I check everything.

 

Janell

[Peek a Boo]

I favor the "include chocolate at every lesson" method.

 

:D

[Melissa in Australia]

I wish for more independent children. I really do. I give the middle 3 instruction for all new concepts in math, and they do the work themselves. the oldest one has passed my math ability, and is very quick at math. he does his math completely independently.

I teach every other subject individually to each child. I spend greater than 7 hours straight teaching them every day. It is more like pushing/dragging in some subjects.

[Carrie12345]

I haven't read all of the responses.

 

With MY family, the actual act of teaching is the biggest joy of homeschooling. Mostly for me, but also for the kids. My oldest is capable of largely (but not entirely) independent learning. If I felt that that was sufficient, I'd probably just put him back in public school.

 

My kids, like me, are natural "skaters". They intuitively know how to exert the least amount of effort while maintaining the appearance of knowledge. They become much more engaged in a topic when there is a reasonable amount of interesting direct instruction and a good deal of conversation, and they walk away with much more understanding. And understanding that LASTS vs. "understanding" that can get them to pass a quick quiz.

 

I guess I can understand taking the independent route if the reason for homeschooling is an enormous objection to the social atmosphere of traditional school and not the academics. That's not our main reason for homeschooling, so I can't really relate.

[5knights3maidens]

At our home math is taught. Other subjects are read Or my children can follow the directions if it is a workbook. For my ds, 11, we did lapbooks with reports so I sat with him and showed him how "not" to copy other work (this was hard for him). He's getting much better at this. ;) Latin for him seems to be easy. He is being taught my the dvd and is fine by himself.

[jujsky]

I think it's important for kids to learn to work independently, but I feel in many ways that's an age/maturity issue. My K kids were not able to do much independent work this year, other than the occasional worksheet or file folder game. We'll build on that each year.

 

I would eventually like them (by high school) to work independently the majority of the time, so that my role at that point would be more of a facilitator/mentor instead of an actual teacher (my current role). I would still assign their work, or at least set benchmarks, and I would still look over their work every day to give them feedback and help them through any weak areas. Honestly, why would most kids (other than the few who are wired this way) give their work 100% effort if they knew no one was going to look at it and hold them accountable? I don't believe in a 100% hands-off approach, but I don't want to hold their hands through every math equation either.

 

That's just my opinion though -- different things work for different families.

[RoughCollie]

I just want to add that sometimes kids cannot work independently. One of my kids has nonverbal learning disorder and one has Asperger's Syndrome. Both of these kids need a lot of parental involvement in their school days.

 

OTOH, the kids who go to PS don't really need me at all. If they were still homeschooled and could be counted on to work diligently until they were finished, they wouldn't need me at all. For them, I would just be the facilitator and the crack-the-whip person.

[Dayle in Guatemala]

I don't know how others answered but, we do a little of both.

 

I "teach" history, latin, and government to all my dc. But, with ds11 I do math and the girls do it independently, science is done with me sometimes and independently other times, and language arts is done with me sometimes and independently others. It just depends on the content.

 

With my oldest dd14, I am doing Chemistry with her because I don't feel comfortable just giving her a Chemistry text and letting her go with it. She needs some guidance at times. So we do it together. But, she's pretty independent in most of her other studies.

[dirty ethel rackham]

I guess I can understand taking the independent route if the reason for homeschooling is an enormous objection to the social atmosphere of traditional school and not the academics. That's not our main reason for homeschooling, so I can't really relate.

 

Your statement implies, if not directly states, that homeschooling parents who allow their children to teach themselves do not care about academics. That could not be further than the truth. There are many paths that lead to the same endpoint.

 

Although the social environment in schools is a large factor in my decision to homeschool, academics IS my main reason. And, I do let my children work independently as they show that they are able. If their work suffers, I step in. Often, they prefer to teach themselves. It does not mean that I hand over a stack of books and say "have at it, see you in the spring." It means that I let them do what they can and I work with them in areas where they need me more.

 

My oldest is an extremely bright 15yob going into 10th grade. In many areas, he has far surpassed me, despite my expensive college education. As much as I love one-on-one time with him, if he were to rely only on me teaching him, I would be holding him back. If he were my only child, I could spend 8 hours a day studying ahead of him and so that I could spend hours teaching him. However, he is not my only child. Also, he has been an autodidactic learner from the time he learned to read (at about age 4.) When he finds something he is intereseted in, he learns about it. He is quite an expert on dinosaurs and can have in depth discussions with academic paleontologists. He needs me more as an organizer of his time and a cheerleader than as a teacher.

 

This autodidactism has rubbed off on my other chidren. My middle son loves drawing and cartooning. He has taken some classes, but is mostly self taught. This is not an area I can help him, other than help him find resources. He has become quite accomplished by reading about it and practicing his techniques. My daughter loves mythology and is becoming a junior expert in mythology from around the world. We may have laid the groundwork by not discouraging her when she begged for D'Aulaire's Greek Myths for her bedtime stories, but she has learned about Norse mythology on her own and is interested in that of other parts of the world as well.

 

My boys are quite competent at teaching themselves math and their test scores show it. Even though I have a BS in Mathematics, I am sometimes stumped by some of the advanced problems in Singapore Math NEM series. When they struggle, we work them out together. My daughter is not so independent at math, but I would not expect her to be at this point. And she may not ever get to the level of independence shown by her older brothers, at least, not in this subject.

 

I guess my picture of homeschooling my children never encompassed me being the expert, but that it would be a journey of discovery.

[Heather in Neverland]

I guess my picture of homeschooling my children never encompassed me being the expert, but that it would be a journey of discovery.

 

:iagree:

[Harriet Vane]

I don't have an opinion on how someone else "should" teach her own children.

 

I try not to be "concerned" over the way I perceive how someone else is teaching her children. Unless I see outright abuse, it's just not my business.

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

[Mekanamom]

I like the way K12 lessons are set up for this. A very independent student can do a lot of work on his/her own. A student who needs more teaching time really can't progress through the curriculum on his/her own. So each student gets what he/she needs in order to progress.

 

My two older students do their work and hand it in to me. Oldest can do most of her work on her own. I check it, make sure she has passed her lesson assessments, and has met the lesson objectives.

 

Middle child often needs more help. When she hands in her work, I can see exactly where she needs more one on one teaching. There are times when she will read over a lesson and needs my attention before she even starts the assignment. That is ok! She just needs more hands-on teaching time than her older sister.

 

Youngest needs me for every lesson, and that is ok too (and expected at her grade level).

 

From 6th grade up, K12 lessons are written directly to the student to help foster more independent work. :) There is still a lot of parental oversight required, though, so I know exactly how they are doing.

[Moni]

Do you think homeschool parents should be teaching lessons or setting up lessons so that the child can do them independently or a little of both?

 

Different folks have different goals, priorities.

 

They 'should be' doing that which brings them closer to their goals.

 

:seeya:

[Mom22ns]

Its a balancing act, but I realised long ago I needed to treat homeschooling as my full time job and not try to do anything, or have other commitments, during our homeschooling day.

 

:iagree:

 

This is where I start. I have one child who need my by his side a lot because he can't stay focused on his own. I have another who is a social kid who likes the attention. I consider it my job to teach them in the way that they learn the best. I do want them to be able to learn independently. I also want them to be able to function in college classes without mommy beside them. We work on independent assignments, projects, reading, but we always talk, discuss and learn together to stay focussed, to increase learning and to make school enjoyable.

 

I recognize that all families do homeschool differently and that large families cannot give the one-on-one time to each child that I give. That is just my way and it works for us for now. :001_smile:

[Kissy]

I haven't read all the other posts so my answer may be redundant but I think the wonderful thing about homeschool is there isn't a way a parent should be teaching lessons. I truly feel it is up to what works for the parent and the child. In the case of doing the work over, I don't think that is necessarily a bad thing if the child is then able to learn from it and move on. As long as a child is learning and their needs are being met I feel the homeschooling is a success. As for us we do short lessons and then my son does his work at the kitchen table where I don't check up on him but I can see if he isn't doing his work and he gets a reasonable amount of time to do that assignment and then we do the next subject. There are some things he won't need me to do a lesson on for a week or two that he feels he can read and do it better without me so I let him. When he gets stuck he comes to me and we do a lesson. He is 11 and this works well for him.

[Carrie12345]

Your statement implies, if not directly states, that homeschooling parents who allow their children to teach themselves do not care about academics. That could not be further than the truth. There are many paths that lead to the same endpoint.

 

 

I stated that I could understand if a parent's reason was social climate. My entire post was about my take on completely independent study and why my family doesn't take that route, which makes it difficult for me to relate to the situation posted by the OP.

 

I can't relate, which is why I tried to focus on my take for my family, rather than addressing whether the family in the OP is right or wrong. I don't know that family.

[EKS]

I think that it depends on the child and it depends on the family.

 

Here, what works well, and when I know I'm doing it right is to have a lesson where we interact and then for my children (particularly the older one) to have some output that they have to produce on their own. There is something to be said for interactive lessons and there is something to be said for independence. Both are important.

[skaterbabs]

I have one child that CAN work independantly, and often does, but needs adult oversight to insure he doesn't just wander off and plays instead of working.

 

I have one child who will whine and cry over being assigned work in the first place, but he does it (quickly most of the time) and the only catch is reminding him to not make foolish mistakes because he's rushing and not paying attention. He doesn't usually require much actual teaching, but that may change as the material gets more difficult.

 

DD is perfectly able to work independently, but HATES doing so. She wants someone (preferably me) to sit next to her and hold her hand through every assignment. For her, we have to push the independent work because if she just *did* it instead of wanting me to do it with her, it would be done more quickly. It actually slows her down to wait for me to walk her through it, but that's how she likes to work. Right now we strike a balance; I walk her through that which I know she does NOT know, and I walk AWAY when I know she DOES know the material and can work by herself.