Do I mention this or just let it go?

[Katy]

I sew, but I guess I would never use a fabric that could be ruined from getting water on it on a kid's prom dress.  I'd probably use a cheap (AND washable) polyester satin, and except for my time it really wouldn't cost more than $30.  If DD wanted silk or a custom dye job or something it would probably turn into more of an "I'm not sewing it for you, but I'll help you when you need help.  Here's the foot you need to sew that slippery fabric with."

 

Also, I wasn't lying about trashing the prom dress for photos being a thing.  I had a family friend ask me to take her daughter's senior portraits and she wanted a trash the dress portrait too.  She wanted me to stand in muddy water and take pictures.  I declined as I don't budget to buy new DSLR's every year, and I'm sure I'd trip and end up ruining my camera.

 

Trash the Prom Dress pictures.

Edited April 25, 2016 by Katy

[Guest]

The thing is with many formal things is the colorfastness of the trims vs. the fabric. So one can bleed onto the other.

 

Another thing is that some formal fabrics wrinkle oddly when wet. I've had one dress shrink when it got wet, transforming from a flat fabric to a more seersucker texture. Other fabrics spot when wet, drying with weird color variations.

 

Formal fabrics are just different.

I sew, I know a thing or two about this as well. Formal fabrics are *not* much different if they have been washed and prepped beforehand as they should. There are a few I wouldn't launder, but cold water contact still wouldn't be an issue - I did learn the hard way to wash ALL my fabrics, even felts and silks, to prevent weirdness down the road. I hot or cold press them afterward to flatten them back out but I don't want indelible water spots, and some care beforehand prevents those :). I can understand your kneejerk reaction, but I really think it's over the top in a big way to something that was not breaking any rules or injuring anyone. A water fight at a wedding or dance? That's fantastic. The dress? Just a dress, made with a lot of love. But still just a dress. Edited April 25, 2016 by Arctic Mama

[Guest]

And I love the trash-the-dress photos way more than the normal awkward prom photos :rofl:

[rocassie]

I get why you're hurt.  As someone that knits and crochets clothing items for friends and family; I get the time, effort, and love that goes into something like this.  My knee jerk reaction would be to be hurt and unappreciated.  

 

However, I have learned (especially when it comes to my kids - although mine are still early elementary age) to adjust my expectations.  In this situation, I would look at the fact that the dress was made so my DD felt beautiful and special for her prom.  I would hope she would look back on that nigh and think - wow, I felt so beautiful and what a fun, special night.  At the end of the night, if she felt that way than my gift of handmaking the dress was worth it because that's why I made it.  And then I would do everything in my power to save the said dress.  

 

I'm so happy for you that the dress can be restored.

 

 

[fairfarmhand]

And I love the trash-the-dress photos way more than the normal awkward prom photos :rofl:

 

Oh wow.

 

Those hurt me.

 

I know it's my own baggage talking. First, I love beautiful things. Partially because growing up I had very few of them.  Also because my family really had to sacrifice for those few beautiful things, and I valued them for the sacrifice, not only for their own beauty.

 

But like I said, that's my own baggage talking.

[Katy]

Oh wow.

 

Those hurt me.

 

I know it's my own baggage talking. First, I love beautiful things. Partially because growing up I had very few of them.  Also because my family really had to sacrifice for those few beautiful things, and I valued them for the sacrifice, not only for their own beauty.

 

But like I said, that's my own baggage talking.

 

Wow.  That's insightful.  I wonder how you'd feel about getting over the baggage by sewing a simple pair of dresses for just you and DD to trash?  On purpose?  (note I mean cheap polyester bought on sale, not something expensive).

[theelfqueen]

Well if she were a guy and got into a water fight in a rented tux, you'd be losing cash on that rental.

So, yeah... I wouldn't think of that as a prom activity.

[BarbecueMom]

I know next to nothing about fabrics, but wouldn't a dress ruined by water end up ruined by sweat after a dance anyway? I mean, if she came home with a dress that was sweat-drenched from dancing, wouldn't that be just as bad?

 

I only ever kept one formal dress (senior homecoming). The rest of them were pretty much toast before I even got home, and that was just from my pathetic excuse for dancing and the occasional tripping and falling.

[EmseB]

I'm rather confounded that it seems common many adults don't. Or just don't care either way I suppose. I'd guess it's because we live in a such a throw away society.

Oh good grief. Having a water fight is not a mark of a throw away society. I save plastic baggies for pete's sake. My younger two boys dress almost exclusively in hand me downs. They own and care for handmade items. To me, in the situation the OP described, I wouldn't make a point to try to make my daughter feel bad about something relatively innocent. My first and only remarks to her that night would not have been about her being careless with my feelings. Especially if I didn't know for a fact that the item in question was actually ruined or not.

 

It's not that I don't care about the item, it's just that when I give it away, I've let it go, and I'm not willing to jeopardize a relationship over it. If I'm that attached to something (that I would want others to know how hurt I was if they messed it up), I will keep it and care for it myself.

 

Clearly the dress is not ruined and the OP's daughter isn't as sensitive as I would have been. So all is well! But to say all of this is somehow that the rest of us are just wasteful or don't care is quite an uncharitable leap.

[Guest]

I didn't even go to prom and never got my wedding dress cleaned. High end shopping for our family is Lands End :lol: I didn't grow up as poor as I live now but clothing isn't something I see value in spending exorbitant time or money on.

 

Let's put it this way, I'm a fiber artist. I spin and knit and crochet and sew and do all sorts of more archaic stuff as well. I don't knit handmade garments for someone who cannot care for them properly because it's not worth the time or money. I don't sew clothes for my kids because I'd be way too upset if they ruined them. If I'm attaching energy or emotional baggage to a physical item and am at ALL worried about the outcome then it is foolish of me to give that power and energy to someone else who won't care as much as me.

 

If you can't detach from the item, maybe it is wiser to purchase instead of make? I can't let go of bigger handmade items so I make them mostly for myself and trustworthy adults like my mom and MiL who can handle them and understand the work I did. My kids? JCPenney all the way.

 

So in that sense I *do* get it. But I already decided with my very first baby and my husband having felted an $80 alpaca baby blanket that took me thirty hours to knit that it wasn't worth spending the time OR money to have my heart broken ;)

 

Especially in things like music festivals, dance recitals, prom, or other group activities where the purpose is dressing up? I think the kids get as many memories or MORE out of the group fun on the way there or hanging out afterward! It's not about the picture moment of looking perfect. And on the scale of what teens can do in a group a water fight is one of the best outcomes. I believe there was a paintball battle one year and dumping punch over heads another .....

Edited April 25, 2016 by Arctic Mama

[Joker]

Well if she were a guy and got into a water fight in a rented tux, you'd be losing cash on that rental.

So, yeah... I wouldn't think of that as a prom activity.

I've known guys thrown in swimming pools while wearing a rented tux and there was no issue returning it.

[Murphy101]

And I love the trash-the-dress photos way more than the normal awkward prom photos :rofl:

I know of them. There's also trash the wedding dress photo ops too.

 

I don't like any of them. I just see purposeful destruction and waste.

 

I just don't get it. And don't want to.

 

Smh

[ktgrok]

Did she know that water would ruin the dress? When I was a teen, something like that would never have crossed my mind. Most teens aren't experts on fabric care.

 

Exactly. As a teen it would never occur to me that water would ruin a dress. 

 

Plus, the dress was for prom. She went to prom, felt fabulous. It served it's purpose to her. She probably had no idea that saving it after that was important. 

[theelfqueen]

I've known guys thrown in swimming pools while wearing a rented tux and there was no issue returning it.

 

I've known a guy who paid the full price of a damaged pair of tux pants from getting them wet more casually - I think it was a spill (and it was more than the rental fee). I think it depends on the type of tux and the company... and some companies offer really cheap 'insurance' options, too. Perhaps this person opted out of something...

 

You guys' prom experiences sound VERY Different from mine - there was definitely not horsing around in the formal wear...(And I went to five different proms in high school!)

Edited April 25, 2016 by theelfqueen

[HeWillSoar]

Well if she were a guy and got into a water fight in a rented tux, you'd be losing cash on that rental.

So, yeah... I wouldn't think of that as a prom activity.

 

Something to tell my son when goes to prom.  Who would have thought?  But yes, I'd take that over some of the stuff I did. 

[Seasider]

I sew, I know a thing or two about this as well. Formal fabrics are *not* much different if they have been washed and prepped beforehand as they should. There are a few I wouldn't launder, but cold water contact still wouldn't be an issue - I did learn the hard way to wash ALL my fabrics, even felts and silks, to prevent weirdness down the road. I hot or cold press them afterward to flatten them back out but I don't want indelible water spots, and some care beforehand prevents those :). I can understand your kneejerk reaction, but I really think it's over the top in a big way to something that was not breaking any rules or injuring anyone. A water fight at a wedding or dance? That's fantastic. The dress? Just a dress, made with a lot of love. But still just a dress.

I come from a line of professional seamstresses. Laundering formal fabrics before constructing the dresses is something none of them ever did. Never.

[Murphy101]

Wow. That's insightful. I wonder how you'd feel about getting over the baggage by sewing a simple pair of dresses for just you and DD to trash? On purpose? (note I mean cheap polyester bought on sale, not something expensive).

I don't know about her, but it wouldn't be something I'd be interested in.

 

For me, it's not about the cost or time of the item. It could be free and I still wouldn't understand purposely ruining it just for the sake of... What? It ruining something supposed to be fun?

 

I wouldn't have any issue with cut it up to repurpose it, or over dying it or many other things that change it forever. But I don't get the concept that the ruining of something in and of itself is supposed to be cute or enjoyable.

[Corraleno]

Has it never rained on anyone's prom day anywhere ever? I don't understand why people think that plain water is going to irreparably damage a dress or a tux. Has anyone ever been forced to pay full price for a rented tux because it got rained on? My wedding dress was silk, it was pouring rain that day (which is pretty much a given in the UK in November), and it got wet, especially on the bottom. It was fine.

 

Compared to all the other things kids get up to at (and after) a prom, a water fight seems like pretty tame, innocent fun. If my daughter came home from prom wet from a water fight, the only thing that would upset me would be not having photos of it! I'd be glad she had a great time — and didn't get into anything worse than a water fight!

[Guest]

Who cares? Moving on

Edited April 25, 2016 by Arctic Mama

[ktgrok]

I know right? It's water, not scissors and a torch. Good, clean fun.

 

I think where some of the disconnect is coming from is that I have never owned ,and never will own, anything that water would destroy. I can't even comprehend it. But I'm incredibly unlikely to make it through an event without spilling something, dropping food, etc. So I would never buy anything that fragile. Or want anyone to make something for me that fragile. Especially for a teen. Short of silk, or something equally fussy, which again, I wouldn't use on a teen's outfit for prom with a bunch of kids eating, drinking, sweating, etc. 

[redsquirrel]

I find it interesting the different perspecives between the people who do handmake special items for others and those who don't.

 

Well, I am knitter. I spent 2 years knitting a very intricate aran sweater for DS2. Trust me when I say this would be considered heirloom quality.  But, I made it with full knowledge that it will get worn. It will get muddy. It will have sticks and thorns stuck in it. It will not get passed on. But, I don't want him not to use the sweater, I don't want him not to run in the woods with his friends in fear of mussing his clothes. I'd rather he got some good use out of something that took such a lot of work. I didn't make it to sit on a shelf, but to be out in the world.

 

I also make lots and lots of hats, gloves, scarves, little bags, mittens etc.  They have all been lost at some point. Once, I made a pair of fingerless gloves for ds2 and he lost them within 36 hours. That was a record.

 

While I understand the love that went into each decision, each stitch, I also know real life. And I can't equate my expression of love for my family and friends with their use of what I made.  I learned to separate the two a long time ago. I have made things for people, things that I spent a lot of time and effort on, only to later suspect it never got used and was probable packed away and will be tossed or donated.  Oh well. I can't control that. I do go out of my way to make anything I give away with washable yarns. I know most people don't want responsibility for washing wool. 

 

A friend made me a beautiful pair of fingerless gloves. I should add that I suffer from stiff hands in the cold and she knew that. She used a very luxurious yarn, that was silky but strong and warm, with no fuzz. She made them dark brown because she knew I would wear them a lot and she wanted to make sure stains wouldn't show. She really put a lot of thought into them, and certainly made them from an expensive wool.  Well, I wore them every winter for 3 years. I took good care of them, washing them properly and blocking them again every time. But, this winter it finally happened. I lost one. It must have fallen out of my coat pocket and I have no idea where it is. It doesn't mean I don't love my friend any less. The alternative was to never use them. But, that's not what we make clothing for.

 

I am so, so glad your daughter's dress is not ruined. What are you going to do with it now? It is a style she can wear again? I am certain it is beautiful

[Murphy101]

Has it never rained on anyone's prom day anywhere ever? I don't understand why people think that plain water is going to irreparably damage a dress or a tux. Has anyone ever been forced to pay full price for a rented tux because it got rained on? My wedding dress was silk, it was pouring rain that day (which is pretty much a given in the UK in November), and it got wet, especially on the bottom. It was fine.

 

Compared to all the other things kids get up to at (and after) a prom, a water fight seems like pretty tame, innocent fun. If my daughter came home from prom wet from a water fight, the only thing that would upset me would be not having photos of it! I'd be glad she had a great time — and didn't get into anything worse than a water fight!

It rained at our prom and a lot of effort went into making sure no one had to get rained on, or at least the ladies did not get rained on. There was a covered drive put up they could be dropped off at, and huge golf umbrellas were being passed around from the front of the entrance to the back so that the sideways rain could be avoided. All the limos dropped off at the drive and all the couples not in limos dropped off the ladies and the men were given umbrellas at the parking lot so they could make the dash as least soaked as possible.

[fairfarmhand]

Never mind, my dd had a great time at prom.

 

Thats all.

Edited April 26, 2016 by fairfarmhand

[Carrie12345]

Just musing here since I don't have kids who are going or have gone to a prom. (I didn't go either.) I always thought the prom was a chance to dress up in way people rarely do and have a somewhat grown-up function. Do kids not grasp that dressing up (in many cases spending a good chunk of money)--doing their hair, buying a fancy dress, etc.--signals that the event is not your average picnic and that perhaps a different standard of behavior is expected? A water fight at a casual picnic is not big deal. At a formal dress event? I think I'm glad my guys haven't expressed any interest in these events (at least not yet).

 

I think it's perfectly reasonable to assume teenagers will act like children in one way or another for at least part of their first or first few formals.  And I'd rather that than they pretend to be actual adults who think they're mature enough for sex and alcohol.  I'd start a water fight for them myself, given the choice!

[wintermom]

I believe there is a TED talk that brings up the issue about a person's personal investment in something and the value they place on that thing. Parents tend to be very invested in their own child, and therefore place a high value on their child. Parents typically invest a lot of time and energy into raising their child, and this translates directly into the value they place on this child. This was the example used in the talk. The speaker did an experiment about the value workers placed on the work they invest time and energy in, and how this was effected by their employers' appreciation (or non-appreciation) of that work. When the work went unappreciated, the workers tended to become much less motivated to repeat the work. 

 

This tread shows this phenomenon perfectly. The mother was invested in this particular dress because of all the time and energy she put into it. The daughter was less invested. Had the daughter spent hours making the dress, sacrificing her time and energy to do so, it's highly likely that she would have treated it with more care. 

 

We are motivated by the appreciation shown by others. It is how most of us are made. When our efforts seem to go unappreciated, then we are less motivated to repeat these actions. 

 

 

Edited April 25, 2016 by wintermom

[Tess in the Burbs]

I don't think she meant to hurt you.  She just had fun.  No teen is going to think about the water and dress getting wet as a bad thing.  You could say something about how special dresses can't get wet, etc.  But perhaps this time say nothing.  Wait until another time to point out how clothing has to be cared for.  Sorry she upset you.  I totally see your point.  But I don't think she was planning this as a hurtful thing.  Me, I might point out fabric can be ruined, and I worked hard on this so take special care.  But kids are kids.  they don't think like that. 

[snickerplum]

I would imagine any fun and wonderful memories was ruined upon her homecoming. I'd rather ruin a dress than a child's heart. If I were her, I would be reluctant to ever accept a gift from you again. Too many strings.

I think that is a bit unfair. I'd flip it - if I even just gave, not to mention hand made, a gift for someone and they carelessly damaged or ruined it, I would be reluctant to put time and effort into another gift.

And I don't believe it would be ruining her heart. If she's old enough to go to prom she's edging toward adulthood and should be held responsible for her actions.

Was she trying to ruin the dress? No. Was she trying to hurt her mom's feelings? No. Was she letting loose and having immature fun? Yes. Should she be punished? No. But she's sure old enough to have a discussion and hear her mom's feelings. To completely let it go is unfair to the OP (holding in her feelings won't help anything) and the daughter needs to be more socially aware, however harmless she felt she was.

I'm sure she did gather from the OP's words that night that her mother wasn't pleased (although, from what she wrote, OP did not seem out of place) but a lack of an apology from the daughter shows a lack of gratitude, respect,and empathy.

[KarenC]

I do understand your hurt, but as the mom of an Asperger daughter, I would be thrilled if she had that much fun at prom.

[Guest]

And as the mom of teens who... shall we just say, tend to get into trouble... I'd be thrilled she didn't come home drunk, stoned, or dead.

 

I'm really not getting the angst.

I thought I was the only one who was all excited she didn't spend the night getting drunk and laid. That was seriously my first thought. That may be *my* baggage coming to the table though :p

[JumpyTheFrog]

I believe there is a TED talk that brings up the issue about a person's personal investment in something and the value they place on that thing. Parents tend to be very invested in their own child, and therefore place a high value on their child. This was the example used in the talk. The speaker did an experiment about the value workers placed on their work, and how this was effected by their employers' appreciation of that work. When the work went unappreciated, the workers tended to become much less motivated to repeat the work.

 

This tread shows this phenomenon perfectly. The mother was invested in this particular dress because of all the time and energy she put into it. The daughter was less invested. It is completely natural. Had the daughter bought and/or made the dress, it's highly likely that she would have treated it with more care.

Good point. The behavioral economics books I've read demonstrate that even owning something like a college coffee mug for a few minutes is enough to make owner feel it is worth more money than others think.

 

I have two little tornadoes of destruction in my house, but I never thought that by the time are almost adults I might have to tell them to not have water fights in formal clothes. Clearly I will have to add this to my list of stuff to teach.

 

I wore my prom dress four times. I am suprised so many people consider them something almost disposable, only meant to be worn once. Even if a girl doesn't intend to wear it again I hope she'd try to keep it in decent condition so someone else could wear it, whether it is given to a friend or donated to a thrift store.

 

I see a big difference between a 10 year old boy getting mud on his everyday clothes and a group of near adults dumping water on each other's formal wear. While I agree that a water fight is better than getting drunk or sleeping around, that doesn't make it acceptable behavior. Even if a girl doesn't care about her dress, it isn't treating the clothes of others with respect. It isn't treating the prom location (if they were still there) with respect. It makes extra work for the employees and puts other girls tottering around in heels at risk of falling.

[mamiof5]

I am so glad the dress is not ruined, regardless of if it will ever be used again or not. I am also glad your daughter had a wonderful prom, and I am truly glad your biggest concern was a water fight. Not trying to diminish the frustration and initial reaction, I think I'd have been frustrated to. But some kids do really immature or harmful things on prom night, a water fight sounds innocent and just fun. Hope it was outside and nothing inside the venue got wet? For me that would have been a different issue. I try to look at different age groups as a different dance. What works with a newborn baby might not work with a toddler, a 5yr old etc. And as they change we also have to change...you learn the new steps to the dance. Sometimes it takes a while to figure out what steps work, but hopefully, eventually it works out. Excited for your daughter in this new phase in life, and so glad you and her have a great relationship, which will come very handy in her transition to a young adult :)

ETA: I have witnessed children who are never taught to respect their own property, or others'. I truly don't appreciate or enjoy their carelessness. I am glad you are trying to teach her to be respectful of her belongings.

Edited April 25, 2016 by mamiof5

[fairfarmhand]

 

Never mind, my dd had a great time at prom.

 

Thats all.

Edited April 26, 2016 by fairfarmhand

[Murphy101]

If I thought they were highly likely to get drunk, stoned, laid or dead - I'd probably not let them go, much less pay a small fortune to attend.

 

That's a pretty low bar of basic expectations of the next generation.

 

Sure, I don't want my teens do to that stuff either, but it is not the sum total of my expectations for them either.

 

It seems the OP handled it fine and her daughter responded to her reasonable hurt and disappointment fine, so it's all good to me. Bonus points that the dress isn't ruined after all. I don't think I'd have done much different that the OP. If this is unusual for the daughter to treat a handmade or formal dress this way and she seems to know better now and how lucky she was the dress wasn't ruined, sounds like everything is all good to me.

[mamiof5]

Initially I felt stung and hurt. But I really am okay. I just wondered if it was something that needed to be followed up upon.

I think it does. Not in a reprimand/scornful tone...but just a good conversation to follow up on. Specially since you mentioned the example of her slapping someone on the face? I am not saying the water fight was bad, not at all. But, for me, it'd be good to bring up the "what can go wrong" in a water fight. Hopefully it wasn't inside the venue... something could have got ruined, they could have got in trouble or charged a fee or something. Even if it was outside, be careful not to accidentally involve others that maybe would not appreciate it (someone walking by?). And, also good to discuss a better time/place for certain things. I wouldn't necessarily follow up with that conversation any time soon, but I believe a "there's a time and a place" for certain things, and not always following our instinct or reaction type of conversation would be good?? It wouldn't hurt :)

[Guest]

Nothing like perspective...You're so right.

 

Initially I felt stung and hurt. But I really am okay. I just wondered if it was something that needed to be followed up upon.

I was mad at my husband for a week over that baby blanket. I specifically told him never to launder it. If any handmade item got soiled he was to set it in the utility sink and tell me immediately. I learned my lesson hard that day :o

 

And I'm kind of dying of curiosity. Do you have a picture of the dress? What did you make it out of? For that much work it's probably stunning and after this much thread drama I think you should let us pat your ego and swoon over your creation.

[Terabith]

I just don't understand how getting a dress wet would ruin it. It's water. Doesn't it get wet to be washed? She didn't clean the bathroom with bleach in it. I don't think it's super reasonable to expect someone to know water would ruin an article of clothing without it being clearly spelled out.

[Annie G]

I would be a little hurt that she didn't seem to care that her dress was sopping wet, but I'd probably be angry that she was flicked with a little water and escalated that into a full scale water fight. I don't know where it took place but I would be ticked if I was a chaperone (do they even still have those at proms? Probably not) or if the water fight was at a restaurant after or something. Unless it was outside, it probably made a mess that someone had to clean up. 

 

 

 

[fairfarmhand]

The dress:

 

https://goo.gl/photos/2cUUf6nwZi98DhXw9

 

 

 

 

 

 

It looks better on her. I;ll have to see where the prom pictures are.

 

Green satiny stuff. Used this applique

 

http://www.ebay.com/itm/231496896320?_trksid=p2057872.m2749.l2649&ssPageName=STRK%3AMEBIDX%3AIT

Edited April 25, 2016 by fairfarmhand

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

I think it's perfectly reasonable to assume teenagers will act like children in one way or another for at least part of their first or first few formals.  And I'd rather that than they pretend to be actual adults who think they're mature enough for sex and alcohol.  I'd start a water fight for them myself, given the choice!

 

I was thinking this exact same thing! I was so glad to hear that around here, the trend seems to be that the crazy fun happens AT the proms, and the kids go home with their parents afterward. That's so different from our day, where the prom was fun, and formal, and had dinner and dancing, and the after-proms were when the kids got casual and went to hotels for sex and drinking and drugs. I vastly prefer the new mindset!

 

As for the dress, I'm in the same camp as those who would be glad that it served its purpose and that she had such a good time at her prom. However, those trash-the-dress pictures make me want to vomit. I have no problem if a dress (or other handmade or expensive item) gets ruined while having spontaneous fun during the course of the event it was intended for. But intentional destruction just for photos, with the specific goal of ruining something someone else could use and love? Breaks my tree-hugging, reducing/reusing/recycling heart. 

Edited April 25, 2016 by ILiveInFlipFlops

[Guest]

The dress:

 

https://goo.gl/photos/2cUUf6nwZi98DhXw9

 

 

 

 

 

 

It looks better on her. I;ll have to see where the prom pictures are.

It's BEAUTIFUL! You did a lovely job on it.

[SKL]

I thought I was the only one who was all excited she didn't spend the night getting drunk and laid. That was seriously my first thought. That may be *my* baggage coming to the table though :p

 

LOL that does it, my kids are NOT going to prom.   :P

 

[38carrots]

 

 

nm

Edited April 25, 2016 by 38carrots

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

The dress:

 

https://goo.gl/photos/2cUUf6nwZi98DhXw9

 

 

 

 

 

 

It looks better on her. I;ll have to see where the prom pictures are.

 

Oh, hooray! I was hoping you'd post a picture! That's incredibly beautiful, and I can see why you'd be hurt, at least initially. 

 

While I'm on the side of the more relaxed attitude toward this, I'm surprised that more people haven't had experience with water ruining formal fabrics. As you mentioned, I've had to try to iron out puckers in dresses that got wet, and I've seen dresses that end up with water rings that don't come out, etc. That happened to my own prom dress, in fact. Thankfully it was not a dress I ever needed after that! Water definitely impacts many formal fabrics badly, and they're never the same again. 

[Julie Smith]

Well if she were a guy and got into a water fight in a rented tux, you'd be losing cash on that rental.

So, yeah... I wouldn't think of that as a prom activity.

 

For my wedding the we rented suits. The guys all had a large water gun fight. Dh was soaking wet for our first dance. There was no problem returning the rented suits. 

[SKL]

Oh, hooray! I was hoping you'd post a picture! That's incredibly beautiful, and I can see why you'd be hurt, at least initially. 

 

While I'm on the side of the more relaxed attitude toward this, I'm surprised that more people haven't had experience with water ruining formal fabrics. As you mentioned, I've had to try to iron out puckers in dresses that got wet, and I've seen dresses that end up with water rings that don't come out, etc. That happened to my own prom dress, in fact. Thankfully it was not a dress I ever needed after that! Water definitely impacts many formal fabrics badly, and they're never the same again. 

 

I agree, this is news to me.  Good news!  Does this mean I never have to worry about fabrics again?  :D

 

The other half of me is saying, I'm glad for this thread, as it's a reminder that I need to start teaching my girls about these considerations.  It's another one of those life skills that only their mom will think to teach them.  :)

 

[Annie G]

No, we don't want our kids to get drunk and have wild sex on prom night. But there are other ways to have fun - most schools around here host post prom parties with bowling, laser tag, food, etc. until dawn. Most kids change into casual clothes for post prom activities.  I'm all about having good clean fun on prom night. 

 

And I just found out that trashing the dress is something some people do after prom.  Sure, the dress belongs to them and they can do what they want with it. But it just seems so wasteful and selfish.  

[Janeway]

Tell her. She is old enough to learn this.

[Critterfixer]

No advice whatsoever, just wanted to say that is one pretty dress!

[BigMamaBird]

The dress:

 

https://goo.gl/photos/2cUUf6nwZi98DhXw9

 

 

 

 

 

 

It looks better on her. I;ll have to see where the prom pictures are.

 

Green satiny stuff. Used this applique

 

http://www.ebay.com/itm/231496896320?_trksid=p2057872.m2749.l2649&ssPageName=STRK%3AMEBIDX%3AIT

 

Oh wow!  That is some stunning work!  Good job!

[clementine]

Very pretty & unique!