Lux Et Veritas Academy Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I am serious! We are all sacrificing, but what would you be doing if you were not homeschooling- Let's dream a little! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'd be working full-time at some job or another. Nothing glamorous, just enough to help with the bills and expenses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'm not homeschooling now--one has graduated, one is not home, one is in ps. I actually gave up far more when I dropped homeschooling! But I think when I homeschool I give up income and the independence from my husband that comes from having my "own" spending $. I also give up our ability to save more. So it's mostly monetary for me. I find I have more time for myself when homeschooling, more freedom during the day, and more time with my kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 We have given up my full time income which means no big house or new cars (unless our old ones completely die which is about to happen, yuck!). Homeschooling and having this time with my kids is worth more to me than any I could buy. I am sure we all feel that way or wouldn't be homeschooling. We sacrifice more (all the new clothing we want, eating out often, and other luxuries) to pay for the kid's interests (mostly musical) which at this point cost more than my house payment. We feel these things are important and a priority for us so well worth the sacrifices we make. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paisley Hedgehog Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 nm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I sacrificed my career as a waitress in a catfish restaurant to be home with my children. Maybe when my husband retires I can return to that career. Or maybe not.;) No sacrifice here. This is hands down the best gig I have ever had. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'm sure on some level I'm giving something up. I mean, EVERY choice is a sacrifice of something else even if it's picking to wear one outfit over another. However, honestly, it doesn't feel that way. To me, I'd be sacrificing homeschooling by doing anything else. And I'm not willing to do THAT. To me, it's like feeding the kids versus rationing food. Obviously if you have to do the latter, you have to; but ideally you can feed your kids 3 meals (and possibly even 2-3 snacks) per day. I prefer to feed my kids and I prefer to homeschool. I really don't think I would be HAPPY doing anything else while I have school-aged children in my home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moni Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 (edited) What are you giving up personally for homeschooling? By definition, everything/anything else?? I don't know that I am "giving up" anything. Unless I am giving up everything else that I'm not doing. What would you be doing if you were not homeschooling When the last one is done schooling.....working. :glare: ....so I can live more "comfortably"..... (referencing other thread....$$....) :seeya: Edited February 10, 2009 by Moni Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imeverywoman Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 Not much---just my personal education which has been very well enhanced by what I'm doing now. There will always time for me. I think. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Closeacademy Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 To be able to homeschool at this point in time, I am doing day care in my home so we are giving up freedom of time and movement. But in a couple of years when I don't have to do day care anymore I will be back to doing what I have always wanted to do.:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 long uninterrupted baths, read more of what I like and less "school" related books, work in a bookstore, travel with my hubby, learn to quilt, sleep! but I know when I get my "freedom" in a few years I will really miss what I have now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 Great question! Honestly if we weren't homeschooling I'd be working with my dh in his business. His business is not my strength at all, but it would give us the flexibility to be able to take off as needed. I know when ds was in private school it would have been an inconvenience to try and find a flexible part time job. Factoring in snow days, days off, sick days, getting out early, and field trips it was hard to schedule in working at all. Now dreaming if I weren't homeschooling I'd working on writing full time, interspersed with travel to exotic locations. I so wish. :lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarheel Heather Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 Great question! Honestly if we weren't homeschooling I'd be working with my dh in his business. His business is not my strength at all, but it would give us the flexibility to be able to take off as needed. I know when ds was in private school it would have been an inconvenience to try and find a flexible part time job. Factoring in snow days, days off, sick days, getting out early, and field trips it was hard to schedule in working at all. Now dreaming if I weren't homeschooling I'd working on writing full time, interspersed with travel to exotic locations. I so wish. :lol::lol: Dream girly! You are allowed!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lux Et Veritas Academy Posted February 10, 2009 Author Share Posted February 10, 2009 Since I started this I should say that my life is much richer from homeschooling. I think I have been equally compensated for my time in ways I can't imagine. I do miss a little free mental time, and the ability to go to the gym without having to drag the whole world with me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 If I weren't HSing I would have a Master's Degree by now (as it stands I have only one year of college under my belt which was spaced out over two years). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LND1218 Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I was a SAHM for 5 years before homeschooling, and if my school age kids were in school, I would still be a SAHM. So no real income sacrifice there. But I am giving up things like - time at the gym, a clean house, play dates for the 2 little ones not in school, cooking better meals, all those mom things I could do while the little one is napping and just more time with my babies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackie in NE Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I am serious! We are all sacrificing, but what would you be doing if you were not homeschooling-Let's dream a little! We're dreaming, right? If I weren't homeschooling, I'd be working. I used to work as a commercial banker, and I'd actually have to be dreaming if I thought I could get a job in banking right now!! But I was very well-paid, and dh and I had plenty of money. So I guess we would have more money to do things like travel with the kids. I would really love to take my dc to Europe and other places to seeall the places we've been studying. But it's hard to take a vacation as a commercial lender. Plus, my kids wouldn't have a classical education, so their humanities instruction would be sorely lacking :tongue_smilie:. So that dream is kind of a bust. Let's see...... I'd have time to marathon again. But the discs in my back are a mess, so I can't actually marathon anymore anyway...... So that dream is kind of a bust. I'd have more cattle and more horses. There! That one could work. I'd have more time to ride the horses I own, and more money to buy the horses I want....... But I'd have to deal with knowing that I hadn't done my absolute best for my kids. I'd have to deal with all the "stuff" they would pick up at school. I guess I'll just make more money and own more horses and cattle later on, when my youngest is in college. Come to think of it.... I guess I'm doing exactly what I want to do right now. :001_smile: Thanks for the post. This is a good way to start my day! :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lorna Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I am serious! We are all sacrificing, but what would you be doing if you were not homeschooling-Let's dream a little! I would be painting full-time, not eating properly and totally immersing myself in my work. I wouldn't do this even if the children were at school however. For me to work properly I can't keep track of time or be responsible for others. I am very glad I had children - they obsess me even more. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I am giving up exercise. If the kids were in school, I'd be at the gym. Now, I have no time for it. I'm giving up cooking too. Not really time for that anymore either. We don't eat as healthy as we would if i had time to go to the grocery store more often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeanestMomInMidwest Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I think the only thing I'm giving up is time to myself in the morning after the kids get on the school bus. But I'm gaining the time in the evenings that would be spent doing homework, running to school events, etc. Is it homeschooling or children that has robbed me of my "me time?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMe Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I used to work for my dh in his business. But I'd never return to it. That's hard on a marriage! My house would be cleaned by me, dinner would be on time and taste better, laundry would be done. I'd probably take some of the load off dh that he does outdoor wise and time consuming business things like deliver his payroll and pick up paperwork, christmas cards, help our office person w/year-end filing and be LESS STRESSED! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam Wilhelm Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 sanity.......... but ................if the kids were in some kind of brick and mortar school I would be insane anyway....... maybe more so. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMe Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 sanity.......... but ................if the kids were in some kind of brick and mortar school I would be insane anyway....... maybe more so. :lol: :lol: :iagree: Doing all that homework they'd bring home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshyne Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 Well, I did give up homeschooling for a year and a half. In some ways, it was great! I loved going to lunch with my husband, or spending the whole day with him while the kids were at school. However, after a few months of that, I started realizing just how much of me I *lost* by giving up homeschooling. I missed looking at curriculum, and I missed being able to identify with you ladies. In general, I felt like I was in the wrong world. :) So, I'm back in my element. I wish I could take DH to the shooting range for his birthday on Friday while the kids "are at school" and not have to pay a sitter, but oh well. I realize I can't have it *all*. I'll pay a sitter for Saturday, and enjoy a great day of schooling on Friday. :) I really do feel like I have the best of everything right now. I'm thankful for the way our life is working out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura K (NC) Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'm not really giving up anything else. The alternatives (working outside the home for someone else) are not attractive. I love staying home and learning and spending time with my kids, and if I had a choice to do anything I wanted, I would be doing exactly that. In an ideal world I wouldn't be spending so much time in the car, but these days will pass so quickly and I'll be so sad when they're gone. I'm actually dreading the day when I have to jump through someone else's hoops for a paycheck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emmy Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'd be a SAHM even if I wasn't homeschooling - I gave up my career 10 years ago for that commitment and I've never regretted it. The single income lifestyle gets to DH & I occasionally but we've never wavered on our choice. For homeschooling I am basically giving up a certain amount of sanity that I get from having time to myself each day, my hobbies, lunches and social time with friends that have their kids in school, and more relaxed weekends where dh and I aren't trying to catch up on all the housework that I could have done during the week were I not schooling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katemary63 Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I actually believe I am giving up quite a bit. Even though I love homeschooling and think it is best for our DDs, I acknowledge that things would be better for me personally - physically and financially - if I was not homeschooling. I drive an old beat up van w/ 150,000 miles on it. I am DYING to go back to school and finish MY degree. I have a kitchen and bathroom that need to be gutted and remodeled. None of this is getting done because we live on one income and also pay college tuition for DD22. We're in that between income that doesn't qualify for ANY state aid, but we really can't afford to pay it either! We, as a couple, are giving up a measure of finacial security by homeschooling since I am not contributing to a retirement account. We haven't been on a vaccation in 5 years. We don't buy the latest ANYTHING and I shop at Goodwill a lot. So, do I FEEL bad about any of this - NOPE. Material things are not very important to me, and tho I would like a tub enclosure that doesn't leak and a dishwasher ( be still my heart!) I know it will happen eventually! ( Like when I'm sixty!) All in due time. We also choose for the kid's sake to live in a rural environment and run a family farm. We believe it is a great place to raise our youngest. FYI, though, it's a net zero. We don't make much, if any, money off it. All in all, the lifestyle we have chosen brings us much joy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMe Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 The alternatives (working outside the home for someone else) are not attractive. :iagree::iagree::iagree:I'm glad I'm not the only one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EKS Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 A career. An advanced degree. Free time. Excess energy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I did have a career. I owned my own portrait studio, but I gave that up to be a SAHM even while my kiddoes were in ps. Then came the decision to homeschool. I had been a photographer all my life...first picked up a camera when I was eleven. Work summers and parttime during high school as a photographer. Put myself through college with photography--and met dh in the darkroom. ;) While he worked, I built a business. Honestly, by the time I was forty-something, I was done with photography, and ready to be a homeschool mom. I've loved the last ten years of learning and growing. If only someone would PAY us to homeschool.....perfect world. :D My 'little' one is done with high school this spring and I get to choose again. Writing and living a creative life is my choice...hopefully it will produce the income needed to fulfil retirement and travel goals.....the financial well is truly dry... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereks mom Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I have a master's degree in education, and I would likely still be teaching in the PS or at a private school if I had not been called to homeschool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shelly in VA Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 A clean house! All of us here, all day, creates lots of extra dirt tracked in and out, extra dirty dishes, extra paper scraps and marker on the tables and remnants of projects. When dh and I both worked full time, the house looked more like a page from a magazine than it does now. However, I'm not embarrassed if someone rings the doorbell unexpectedly (usually) and the "critical" areas are clean (kitchen, bathrooms), so it's really not bad, just lived in. I will admit that I wish there was less clutter, and that if the kids were in school we could probably corral their homework material and books in a corner of a room or in their own bedrooms, but there's too much here to do that now. That's my biggest issue! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I was sure I'd have a lot of things to say, but once I tired to type them, I realized I wouldn't have those things even if the kids were in school. What a happy surprise! When I really think about it, I am sacrificing less having my kids home with me than if they went to school. The only thing I'd gain would be more money at a job. But when I think of it, I'm not sure it's worth it. I'd have less of everything else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I gave up my own education and a career. Having a college education was very important to me. I tried going back when ds was 1yo, but found I couldn't work, go to college and have a baby. I figured I would wait until the kids where school age and then go back. Hsing eliminated any chance of that. There was always a hope that I could go back once dd10 got to 7th grade (ds was very independent then) but we adopted my niece so that won't be happening. I gave up a huge dream of mine that I thought Nothing woud have got in the way of. Guess babies have a way of doing that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I gave up my career, which means struggling financially, I gave up the little bit of time I had away from the kids to clear my head etc, Apparently I have given up having any type of relationship with men, because they either a) don't agree with homeschooling or b) don't like that I struggle financially, meaning I can't afford a babysitter etc to go out. I gave up almost all my hobbies because I can't afford the supplies nor can I afford a sitter to watch the kids so I can get out to do them. If I was not homeschooling I would be doing what I was before I started, working, going out with friends, dating, doing my hobbies etc. That said, I would not change anything, so it will be another 17 years before I resume all of that stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 a high-profile career in a really fun/unusual field. At times I do get a pang of missing it, but as others have said, I traded it for something much better! :) One thing I do miss, that I would have as a non-homeschooling stay at home mom, is the ability to arrrange my time (at least the part of the day that the kids are in school) according to my own rhythms. You know, eat when I want, read when I want, knock out the cleaning jobs quickly without interruption... and, this I would love... go to the pool in the early afternoon with no kids to keep an eye on! If they were all to go to outschool today, I would indulge my creative side. Take some art lessons, spend more time writing, get out and really work on a nature journal... all on my own time schedule! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gamom3 Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I have 8 more years of homeschooling and then I will be going back in the work force full time(hopefully), but starting at the bottom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 (edited) I gave up my technical writing career (something I LOVED and was good at)...but I did that for the opportunity to be a stay at home mom before I ever decided to homeschool. I admit that it was HARD at first. I am a very social person and being left alone all day with my kids when they were little was a bit more like torture than fun. :( However, it was important enough to me to be *that* kind of mom (because my mom never could be that kind of mom for me) that I kept at it, worked hard to find things to make the days less hard, found friends to talk to (online and IRL) and made it work. Sometimes I still miss my career, but luckily, my passion is for writing and just because I no longer make money doing it doesn't mean that I have to stop writing. That has helped me a lot! That, and Lexapro. :) Now...start a post on what I would be sacrificing if I sent my kids to school and if I worked full time. THAT would be a much longer list. Edited February 10, 2009 by Tree House Academy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Inna* Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 Not much. Second income and more adult interaction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoyfulMama Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I gave up: paying for child care dealing with someone else's ideas of how to raise my children living in my car struggles about fitting into the educational system box struggles of trying to balance work and family (and being on-call) I have an advanced degree, and I loved my work, and I look forward to a time when I can go back to it and concentrate on it again, and give it the full attention it deserves, when I am not torn between work and littles at home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassenach Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 So far, I've truly only gained. I have almost always been a sahm and if I wasn't hsing, I would still be home with my 4yo. That said, before hsing, my master plan was to go back to school and become an RN once the kids were all in school. So as of next year, I'm postponing nursing school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'm giving up driving in traffic, dealing with bosses, gossip about everyone, lunches and coffee out, and of course the "check/direct deposit" that has my name on it. I'm giving up ...by homeschooling...if I didn't work...more trips to volunteer...cuz you're always the one that "Can" talks with the public school about what classes I don't want my children taking.... Bad attitudes that are so contagious... Hmm..I think I can have it all if I just get some Bon Bons for my next TV show. BTW, what are Bon Bons? Carrie:-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colleen Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'm not sure what you mean when you say we're all sacrificing. Of course there are other things I'd do if I didn't educate my children at home, just as there are other things I'd do if I didn't have children at all. But I wouldn't say I'm "sacrificing" simply by being a parent; likewise, I'm not "sacrificing" by homeschooling. It's just the choice I'm making. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I don't look at it like I'm "sacrificing" anything by homeschooling. Maybe a little shred of sanity, but it does grow back now and then. :001_huh: It would be a sacrifice for me to have to send the girls to school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C_l_e_0..Q_c Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I gave up a job with a 6 figures salary + bonuses. I gave up an engineering degree. It will be useless by the time I want to go back to work. Too outdated. In fact I have no idea what kind of job I'll be able to get when we're done homeschooling. I don't really want an entry-level job, and I'm not sure I'll be able to deal with a boss anymore. I love my freedom! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I honestly don't know. Is that sad? My DD was born 18 months after I got married, and I was a 20 year old college student. When I graduated college I just continued to be home with her, and we have been homeschooling since she was born. Basically I don't know anything else, so I don't know what I have given up if that makes any sense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danielle Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 When dd was born, I had a flourishing writing career doing corporate communications and feature articles. I don't know how anyone else does it but dd was such a demanding and exhausting baby I could hardly read a book, much less get dressed to meet clients or do marketing. I thought I was taking 5 years off until she went to school--ha! by mid 2nd grade there she was back again! Now it doesn't look like I'll ever get rid of her :001_smile: This year I realized it would be good for her to become a more independent learner (9th grade) and after several false starts, she's doing great. I'm working on regenerating the writing business, but after nearly 15 years, there's not a soul among my old contacts that are still in the same jobs. Luckily, I have a big portfolio, and no one has yet asked why all the articles are 15 years old. I must say, though, that homeschooling has made me organized and efficient far beyond what I was 15 years ago, and I can accomplish way more in less time. I'm fairly prolific and the writing is going quite well. While I did manage to complete the 2 French books over the last 3 years, if I hadn't homeschooled dd, I'd have done a couple of books per year, at least. In retrospect, I wish I would have hired help, and kept my hand in the corporate/magazine market part time. But ya know, I really wanted to be with dd, and she really needed me. Now she's a teen and we just have the greatest relationship. Was it worth what I gave up? Unquestionably. But there is a pang over what I paid, also. Danielle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iquilt Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I feel like I've gained since we started homeschooling. I've been a SAHM for 8 years now and always planned to be the room mom when my kids were in school, volunteering everywhere and raising money for their school. After reality of ps set in and we pulled our oldest out to homeschool my plans changed, but I don't feel like I'm sacrificing much. I can't remember the last time I had lunch with friends without kids, but we just have lunch with the kids. When I arrange playdates for my kids they are truthfully more for me and my friends to get to talk while the kids play. A second income would all be zapped by childcare expenses, extra healthcare costs for sick time, extra clothes for school, supplies for school, lunches away from home, etc. I would still be running around for all of their activities, except they would be after working all day and coming home to still do dinner, homework, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 I'd have gone back to uni and done honours. I had a thesis idea picked out and all. Then my priorities changed dramatically without consulting me first :) No idea what I'd have done after that. What good is an honours degree in history anyway? I was intending to go into teaching, but after watching dh's experiences I sure don't want to do that! :) Rosie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted February 10, 2009 Share Posted February 10, 2009 To do any one thing means you aren't doing another, so it is "given up". But sacrifice implies that you would rather be doing something else...which isn't what you said.Yes, I also assumed the discussion was one of opportunity cost. I gave up a competitive technical career and my professional reputation that I worked hard for years to create. We gave up more than 50% of our income when I became a SAHM, and it is unlikely I will ever be able to return because of the rapid evolution of technology. I have delayed my own degree, though my being home full time allowed us to make the leap to grad school for my husband, so higher education has worked out well. And, frankly, higher ed programs for non-traditional students are cropping up all over, so my own delay may yet be a benefit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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