Gifts Gone Wrong

[goldenecho]

Just for fun and curiousity...what gifts did you (or grandparents or someone else) give your kids that you thought would be totally cool but backfired big time?

 

For us, there was the ridable stuffed horse that moved and neighed that our aunt give my oldest son when he was little.     It was a really cool gift but my son was TERRIFIED of it.    She turned it on for him and he immediately started crying. 

 

So, what's you're fabulous turned to horrible gifts?

[theelfqueen]

My oldest was little during the height of Tickle Me Elko and was terrified of it lol 

When my middle son was about 4 he had his heart set on getting a cotton candy maker for Christmas. He had seen one on a commercial and was obsessed with it. And they were nowhere to be found. I drove an hour and a half to get one - fancier than the one from the commercial but pink. Kid opened it, took one look at it and set it aside. Dh asked him "Oh what did Santa bring you?" Son "A girly cotton candy machine." 

My mom bought my oldest son a speedometer for his bicycle. He was excited he couldn't stop looking at it and trying to go faster. And he was looking at it for his new high speed when .... wham he hit (so hard that he damaged) the neighbor's garage door. He split his lip too. 

[SKL]

Well, one of my kids recently informed me how offensive she considers books as a gift, LOL.  (Her sister feels the opposite.)

I can't think of any super bombs, but I'm sure there are some gifts that just never got used.  Though some of them become attractive months or even years later.

[SKL]

One from 44 years ago - my parents bought my kid brother a smiley play phone for his 1st birthday.  They were so sure it would be a hit - and back then a 1yo only got 1 birthday present, so that was it.  They put it face-up in a bag so it would be easy for him to open - and as a "cute surprise."  He looked in the bag and saw those eyes looking back at him, and totally freaked out.  I am not sure whether he ever became OK with that phone.  I guess it should be a funny memory, but actually it's sad, because of how my parents' anticipation turned to disappointment.

[SKL]

One bright idea an auntie had - a great big black punching bag for my kids.  The only place in the house where it would fit was in the kitchen.  And to stabilize it, the base had to be filled with water, so it was too heavy to move.  It was a long time before I got the guts to ask the auntie if I could please take it to the treelawn.

[Rachel]

My husband once bought my kids cheap recorders, then went out of town for a week. I thought that was cruel and unusual punishment!

[HomeAgain]

I thought my nephew would love the Leap Frog Letter Factory fridge magnets.
Oh.........he did......very much.  My sister paid me back years later by giving my 2yo the same set PLUS a set of extra letters.  I was never so glad when the batteries ran down. ?

[goldberry]

15 minutes ago, texasmom33 said:

I bought a friend’s dd a copy of A Fly Went By when she turned 3 or 4.

 

OMG that was my most favorite book ever as a child!  The hunter with the gun was a little scary to me (only because he was going after the fox, not a hunter in general), just enough to add some excitement...  I bought it for DD and had no problem with it.  And we are not "gun people" at all.

Edited October 23, 2018 by goldberry

[SanDiegoMom]

My oldest daughter was obsessed from the age of like 4 with "a puppy that barks when you squeeze it" that she saw who knows where.  I never understood exactly what it looked like, but three different Christmases she asked for it, and she got three different puppies that barked when you squeezed them, and none of them were the right one.  We finally gave up.

 

[BarbecueMom]

45 minutes ago, HomeAgain said:

I thought my nephew would love the Leap Frog Letter Factory fridge magnets.
Oh.........he did......very much.  My sister paid me back years later by giving my 2yo the same set PLUS a set of extra letters.  I was never so glad when the batteries ran down. ?

Next to the word "diabolical" in a dictionary, there should be a picture of a gift-wrapped Leap Frog fridge magnet set... with extra batteries.  My older two had one of those that, um, "disappeared under mysterious circumstances."  Soon after my youngest was born, I was yard sale shopping with my mom and found another one.  Both my mom (who buys everything and doesn't mind noise) and the seller (who was trying to, you know, sell it) tried to dissuade me (the minimalist who pukes with repetitive noises), but I bought it for DS anyway.  I blame postpartum brain.

Anyway, he only played with it a couple times, in his room with the door shut, and then declared that he knew all the letters and sounds and didn't want it anymore.  I am ever so grateful.

[SKL]

Oh yeah, I found this really lovely xylophone type toy - you have to put the metal pipes in order and then tap and a lovely sound comes out.

Except, my then 2yo niece did not understand the "tap" part.  She pounded and produced a most horrific din.  I'm sure my brother and SIL thought I was nuts.  Or just mean.  (Yes, this was long before I had kids.)

BUT I liked it so much, I bought 2 more for my kids.  They hardly ever used them though.

[athena1277]

When my oldest was in K, my in-laws bought her a karaoke machine for Christmas “because she can read!”  Dd had no idea what it was and no interest in learning. It went to the garage after one semi use.

[PeachyDoodle]

I've posted on here before about the s3x kitten collection MIL tried to start for dd when she was a baby. Less of an issue for dd since she was too little to notice, but not a big hit for dh and me!

One Christmas when dd was maybe 3 or 4, some friends of my parents came by. The wife asked dd what kind of dolls she liked, to which dd responded disdainfully, "I don't like dolls at all!" (She was more of a Lego kind of girl.) Upon which my mother's friend pulled out a gift for dd, which was -- you guessed it -- a Little Mermaid doll. *cringe*

[fairfarmhand]

1 hour ago, PeachyDoodle said:

I've posted on here before about the s3x kitten collection MIL tried to start for dd when she was a baby. Less of an issue for dd since she was too little to notice, but not a big hit for dh and me!

One Christmas when dd was maybe 3 or 4, some friends of my parents came by. The wife asked dd what kind of dolls she liked, to which dd responded disdainfully, "I don't like dolls at all!" (She was more of a Lego kind of girl.) Upon which my mother's friend pulled out a gift for dd, which was -- you guessed it -- a Little Mermaid doll. *cringe*

Wait I’ve never heard the mil story! Do tell!

[shawthorne44]

One from my aunt.   

You need to know that my photo is next to the definition of Black Thumb.    Just last night I explained to DD that No, I will not water her plant because then it will surely die.  In fact, I don't even stand close to it when looking at it.  My mother on the other hand is awesome with plants.  It might be her super-power.   

In my late 20's my aunt gave a stack at least a foot high of hardback book on growing Herbs.  It must have been outrageously expensive, and it had a ton of thought in it too.   She just got confused and totally missed the mark.  Pretty typical.  

[lavender's green]

One of my kids got a large stuffed whale right when he was terrified of the whale in Pinocchio. We were also vacationing at the beach at the time!

My middle child has a sad history of receiving bad gifts compared to his big brother. Like a shirt in his brother's color and size (which the relatives are aware of!), plus it won't even fit for several years. Or they'll both get a similar gift, but big brother's is a much cooler version. Or he finally gets a really cool gift, but it was bought at a garage sale and breaks immediately. Or the grandparents visit on big brother's birthday weekend, but not his. And so on. Poor kid. It's gotten so bad that we're about to ban gifts from relatives.

 

[Guest]

One of the famous ones in my family was one year when my aunt gave my grandmother a little fake trophy statue with “World’s Baddest Grandma” on it. It might have been that my grandma’s dementia was just beginning to kick in, or it could have just been a generation gap thing, but Grandma could not understand why she would get such a mean trinket. She was terribly offended and my aunt was saying, “No, Mother! It means bad like cool! It’s like saying you’re a cool grandma!” But Grandma just kept saying, “Why would you give me such a horrible gift???” 

One time I spent a ridiculous amount of money expedited-shipping a digital drawing tablet for dd to get for Christmas. It was supposed to be her one “Wow!” gift that year and I was down to the last week. She did like the idea of it but executing it was too hard and she soon gave up on it. Back to just the regular old low-tech drawing board. 

[KungFuPanda]

When Dd was around 11, mil gave her a set of dolls; a boy and a girl. They were ugly, but Dd handles it well because Grandma always gave weird gifts. Some were hits and some were not. 

The DOG hated these dolls. His reaction was so hysterical that it actually upped the entertainment value of the gift. He barked like crazy and attacked them. We caught him trying to bury them in the back yard several times. Eventually they disappeared. 

Fast forward to THIS year. I’m digging new garden beds and what should I discover? I think I’m going to turn it into some sort of planter thing, so it’s chilling among the pots now. I think this is the boy.  

 

 

[wintermom]

5 minutes ago, KungFuPanda said:

When Dd was around 11, mil gave her a set of dolls; a boy and a girl. They were ugly, but Dd handles it well because Grandma always gave weird gifts. Some were hits and some were not. 

The DOG hated these dolls. His reaction was so hysterical that it actually upped the entertainment value of the gift. He barked like crazy and attacked them. We caught him trying to bury them in the back yard several times. Eventually they disappeared. 

Fast forward to THIS year. I’m digging new garden beds and what should I discover? I think I’m going to turn it into some sort of planter thing, so it’s chilling among the pots now. I think this is the boy.  

 

 

I'm with the dog. This doll looks pretty scary. ? Maybe it looked better before it ended up in the garden, though.

[KungFuPanda]

3 minutes ago, wintermom said:

I'm with the dog. This doll looks pretty scary. ? Maybe it looked better before it ended up in the garden, though.

It looks better now ?

[PeachyDoodle]

1 hour ago, fairfarmhand said:

Wait I’ve never heard the mil story! Do tell!

I tried to find my old post but it must have gotten lost in the board change-over.

Before dd's first Christmas, MIL announced that she wanted to start her a collection, something MIL could add to each year. I loved the idea. Then Christmas came, and dd opened (well, I opened) MIL's gift. It was a cat figurine, but this cat was very well-endowed and wearing a 50's-style dress with a full skirt and and sunglasses and an enormous straw hat. It was... not what I would have picked for my baby, but ok. I stuck it in the closet on the theory that a 6-month-old baby didn't need to have an expensive(?) figurine out where it might get broken.

The next year, though, my 18-month-old pulled out a cat that can only be described as a prostitute, complete with short skirt and low-cut blouse, striking a come-hither pose against a stop sign. (I'm not kidding.) That's when dh and I decided he should perhaps suggest that his mom find another line of gifts for her only granddaughter.

Ironically, my dd now loves cats. I kind of wish we'd kept them. They would have been hilarious to pull out when she's older!

[Baseball mom]

33 minutes ago, KungFuPanda said:

It looks better now ?

? LOL

FIL and stepMIL gave ds a GIRL outfit for his 1st Christmas.  It looked like a little cheer outfit.  I had opened the present at FIL.  Looked in the box and shut the lid.  StepMIL comes over and says "it is just the cutest outfit.  He will look so cute."   Dh saw it after we got home.  He said "Hell no"  I took the outfit back and got a BOY sweatsuit.

 

[Baseball mom]

5 minutes ago, Margaret in CO said:

My mil gave dd a cardboard box once. Her comment, "It's a NICE box! It's useful." Right. That was the year that she spent over $500 on toys for her "real" grandchildren. And they opened them together. I received a dirty, chipped, second-hand mug. "D"mil called to ask me where HER gift was. I pointed out that she'd gotten three boxes of nice stationery, pens, and $50 of postage. "No, those were from my son, NOT from you.!" Right. Guess I didn't count. 

WOW  just WOW that is...uh ...wrong on so many levels.

[Acorn]

So I had to google the sexy cats,

there are some collectibles that are hundreds of $.

Why?

http://www.musiccitycardsandgifts.com/Alleycats-Figurines.html

[Shoeless]

.

 

 

Edited October 4, 2020 by MissLemon

[Selkie]

2 hours ago, KungFuPanda said:

When Dd was around 11, mil gave her a set of dolls; a boy and a girl. They were ugly, but Dd handles it well because Grandma always gave weird gifts. Some were hits and some were not. 

The DOG hated these dolls. His reaction was so hysterical that it actually upped the entertainment value of the gift. He barked like crazy and attacked them. We caught him trying to bury them in the back yard several times. Eventually they disappeared. 

Fast forward to THIS year. I’m digging new garden beds and what should I discover? I think I’m going to turn it into some sort of planter thing, so it’s chilling among the pots now. I think this is the boy.  

 

 

 This cracked me up so bad. You know grandma's got bad taste when even the dog is horrified... ?

[KungFuPanda]

3 hours ago, texasmom33 said:

I saw the picture before I read the last line and I couldn't stop thinking WHO THE HECK BUYS DIRTY DOLLS FOR SMALL CHILDREN!?? That's horrifying!! My dd walked by and saw it on my phone and was "what is THAT!?" ??

To be fair, the creepy twins were new and clean when we got them. They just got dirty when the dog hid the bodies. ?

[caedmyn]

40 minutes ago, KungFuPanda said:

To be fair, the creepy twins were new and clean when we got them. They just got dirty when the dog hid the bodies. ?

I needed a laugh tonight...thanks ?

[goldenecho]

11 hours ago, happysmileylady said:

When my nephew was like 8 I think, my sister decided he was big enough to receive a pocket knife for his birthday.  I am not sure what on earth possessed her to think that he could handle that.  Perhaps some 8yr olds are capable, but my nephew definitely was not.  

As evidenced by the fact that within an hour of opening Christmas gifts, they were in the ER getting stitches in his thumb and hand.  Great way to spend Christmas Day.  

 

ETA: JFTR....he's 13 now, and thinks this is the best story ever to tell.  So I suppose there is that.  

 

OUCH!   

My dad  had me whittling sticks at four...but I think pocket knives are the kind of gifts that need to come with "instructions and instructors"  (like, I'm pretty sure my dad sat with me a whole day reminding me to cut away from myself and took the knife away when he wasn't there).    After my dad died I inherited, among other things, his pocket knife, and suddenly realized I had NEVER taught my sons how to use one, and my oldest was TWELVE.   He still cut himself once that day, even after me reminding him multiple times to cut away (luckily it was a minor cut).  

I just got all three of my kids pocket knives this year, and my youngest is 10.   Luckily no injuries yet!   (Though my youngest has had stitches twice from just running around a falling...so, I guess there's a certain amount of "no matter how much you protect them...stuff happens").

[goldenecho]

7 hours ago, KungFuPanda said:

When Dd was around 11, mil gave her a set of dolls; a boy and a girl. They were ugly, but Dd handles it well because Grandma always gave weird gifts. Some were hits and some were not. 

The DOG hated these dolls. His reaction was so hysterical that it actually upped the entertainment value of the gift. He barked like crazy and attacked them. We caught him trying to bury them in the back yard several times. Eventually they disappeared. 

Fast forward to THIS year. I’m digging new garden beds and what should I discover? I think I’m going to turn it into some sort of planter thing, so it’s chilling among the pots now. I think this is the boy.  

 

 

I think you have your halloween decor for this year!   That is pretty horrifying. 

[lailasmum]

My youngest got given one of those ridable stuffed horses too. She found it so terrifying it spent most of its life in our utility room or in the attic before I finally gave it away. We've had a few other terrifying stuffed animals. It seems to be the eyes and how they look in the dark that edges them into the terrifying category. Luckily no filthy or obviously creepy/inappropriate toys. I know I received a rag doll from a relative when I was a young teenager and it was really suitable for an under 7yr old but I think that was her losing track of how old we were. 

[Bambam]

My MIL got one of the kids a Furby - I think that is what they were called - little 8" stiff furry weird looking blobs that made random noises based maybe on movement close by? It was ugly. It was evil in that it only made those weird noises sometimes - nothing repeatable. The kids, for some unknown reason, loved that thing. But it scared the rest of us by making random sounds in the middle of the night in a dark room with no one else in there. I finally hid that thing in the top shelf of a corner cabinet pushed towards the back - and sometimes it would still make random noises. I was really sad when someone found it when we were packing to move, and it ended up packed. I was hoping it would stay there. Imagine the poor people who moved into that house with those random noises at random times! 

[Guest]

13 hours ago, happysmileylady said:

This reminds me of a story from my brother's MIL.

 

My family is generally very open.  Meaning, my ILs have always been welcome at family Thanksgiving, Christmases, Birthdays etc.  And the same is extended to other ILs.  My sister's ILs are always welcome to holiday events, as are my brother's ILs etc etc.  

So one year, my brother hosted Christmas.  My parents, my brother's wife's parents, various and assorted siblings from all sides, massive amounts of kids....we are talking like approaching 50 people in my brother's house.

 

My parents sometimes describe their Christmas gifts as "wretched excess."  Although when loading everything into a single vehicle that might look like the case, the reality is that my parents have a pretty strict limit on both the number and dollar amount of gifts they give each grandchild.  They just happen to have a lot of grandkids and when all grandkids are in the same room and all grandkids get 3 to 5 gifts....it just looks massive.  "wretched excess."

 

So, the year everyone was there at Christmas....my parents included all of my brother's wife's nieces and nephews.  Not in the same fashion as they gifted all their grandkids, since they didn't know the other kids, like at all.  But, in our family....Christmas is about kids....give kids gifts.  

 

That year, my brother's middle Dd was like 8 or 9.  And, she LOVED Barbies.  Loved them.  LOVED THEM.  So, my parents bought her one of those big Barbie houses.  They got a few other Barbie gifts to go with it...smaller things like a new Barbie, a couple of outfits, etc.  But that Barbie house was basically the gift.  

 

Before I go further, I want to be super clear...my parents aren't buying grandkids love.  They just really like to give gifts, and can.  They carefully consider the kid, the parents, the living situation, everything.  

 

So, my niece unwraps this huge Barbie house from my parents, is jumping up and down ecstatic, thank you thank you thank you grandma!

 

My brother's MIL...OUTLOUD...says "well how do you compete with that?!?!?!?  

 

And got up and walked off.  My niece just deflated.  She old enough to understand that her grandma was obviously upset, but didn't really understand why.  

It was the last time the families celebrated events together.  

 

Why DO people feel the need to "win" the holidays?!?!  Isn't it really about making the kids happy in these sorts of celebrations.  

To be fair, though, I really don’t like it when some person in the family must do their wretched excess thing, because it does overshadow everyone else’s gifts. My sister did that when the kids were little. My mother often did it too. It wasn’t even dollar amount value; it was sheer quantity. She would raid the thrift store and would wrap up boxes filled with books or hot wheels or literally trashbags full of clothes. It got on my damn last nerve, because the kids would be totally burned out from the overstim and were barely interested in their “Santa” gifts the next day. It was toooooo much stuff. I didn’t want to fill my bookshelves with gobs of crappy books, nor did I want to fill their closets with a random bunch of thrift store clothes. One year she gave all my kids Christmas stockings that were filled to the brim with candy. This was totally unnecessary and just made their stockings from us seem moot and scanty. 

Your last paragraph: your parents may actually have been trying to “win” the holidays. They overdid what the other grandma was able to do by a long mile. I believe my sister’s motive was because she wanted to be seen as the favorite aunt and she didn’t have kids. So she wanted to lavish them with wretched excess so they would be ga-ga over Auntie.

[SKL]

I just remembered one - when I graduated from high school, my math teacher and his wife came to my open house and gave me a gift.  (Most people did not bring gifts but some gave a bit of money.)  The gift was a razor!  I was horrified and wondered what it was about me that made him think I needed a razor!

[SKL]

As for the "wretched excess" thing, I used to be the auntie who brought great gifts for my wee nephews/nieces.  Not necessarily big, but cool stuff.  I had the time and inclination to shop for cool kid toys (mainly because I didn't have kids of my own).  One year I was working for a toy company and bought a big stuffed panda for cost.  It was really cool and the value was a lot more than what I paid for it.  My sister made a snide comment about competition, but my dad shut her right up.  I just happen to like buying cool things for tots.

By the time the kids were old enough to really notice who gave what, I had scaled the gifts back to what most would be able to afford.  For one thing, nobody needs that much crap in their house.  But how can anyone begrudge a smile on a little kid's face?

[Guest]

27 minutes ago, happysmileylady said:

Do you really think that 3 to 5 gifts is a large and/or excessive amount to give a child?  Especially with a specific set dollar amount that they spend equally among all the grandkids?

The only reason they jokingly call it wreched excess is because when you buy even just 3 gifts for each of your TEN grandchildren, that's 30 gifts to haul in the house....and that doesn't even count all 4 of your kids and their spouses, with each of them getting 2 to 3 gifts apiece...that's a lot of gifts concentrated into one space.  

 

And, if you actually knew my parents you would know that the idea that they were trying to "win" the holiday is absolutely laughable.  They aren't buying their grandchildren's love or anything of the sort, and never have.  They did absolutely nothing different that year than they have ever done any other year.  Or, are you suggesting that people should determine what gifts they buy their OWN grandchildren based not on the grandchildren, but on what the grandchildren's might get their feelings hurt over?  That my parents should have deliberately purchased less that year only because the other grandma happened to be part of that year's celebration?

My parents are very generous with their children and grandchildren and share their generosity equally among all their children and grandchildren.  They were frugal and scrimped and saved when we were kids, and now that all their children are grown and married, they enjoy sharing what they have scrimped and saved with everyone in their family.  And they do so because they want to and they can afford to, NOT to try to buy anyone's love.  And certainly not because they care how other people will see them.  

To me it is the wow factor of the dollhouse and the barbi and the accessories. It’s a big deal. Giving should be in keeping with what is normal for the whole family if one is going to include others. Or else give the big wow thing at a different time. 

So, here’s an example, because I come from AND married into big families. In my in-law family celebration, we used to play the gift game thing where everyone picks a number, etc. Suppose the wealthiest sibling or the sibling who doesn’t have kids comes to the party with nice WOW gifts for each of the nineteen nieces/nephews. They could say, “well I just want to give these gifts because I don’t have kids of my own and I want to make it wondeful for them.” Well, sure, you could say that’s thoughtful, but it also puts a focus on the gift-giving aunt that is weirdly unbalanced for the celebration. All the other siblings were counting on getting the fun through the exchange game, but Childless Aunt changed the tone of the celebration by bringing all those gifts. It does make it look like Childless Aunt just wants to attention and accolades on her. 

Also, just for sheer quantity, I never did like 3, 4, 5 gifts per person because it’s just a dang lot of people in my family. I never did like the chaos, the excess, the noise, the mountains of gift wrap trash, the wastefulness. These weren’t even high-value gifts it was just a freakin’ lot of junk to deal with. I also didn’t want my kids to think they have to get mountains of gifts to feel loved. Finally, at long last, my mother this year asked if we could just exchange cookies/treats and not give gifts. I am in heaven because I have wanted no gifts or something close to it for years and years. 

I’m not a gift person. It’s not my love language. I can imagine one grandma (or aunt/whatever) being hurt because another grandma set out to blow the grandkids’ minds with lavish gifts and it made the other participants seem cheap or poor by comparison. No, I don’t think the other grandma should have stalked off in a tizzy, but I can see myself being irked by the big wow barbie gifts, too. Like, “Here kids, now that you have opened Other Grandma’s $250 of Barbie gifts, here’s my tin of homemade cookies. Yay.” 

[Guest]

45 minutes ago, happysmileylady said:

You seem to be coming at this from your own perspective instead of understanding that I know how my own parents operate.

This was normal for my family.  Every year, my parents give each of their grandkids 3 to 5 gifts.  In fact, growing up, they gave each of US 5 gifts apiece.  And these gifts are ALWAYS given at the family Christmas celebration specifically because most years, all of us kids spend our Christmas mornings in our own homes with our kids, and then turn around and go a Christmas day celebration with our spouses families.  In this specific case, my brother's ILs decided to come to my brother's house that night, so that they could go do something else (I don't even know what) on Christmas day. 

As far as my parents are concerned, Christmas is about the kids, not the adults.  Christmas gifts are about what the child wants and enjoys and what puts a smile on the child's face, and not about what might hurt the feelings of another adult.  Kids first.  Always.  

 

In terms of you not liking gifts/not being a gift person...it sounds like you have a lot of people in your life who do try to buy love, and for that I am sorry.  But please believe me when I tell you that if you knew my parents, you would know that I am telling you the truth when I say that the idea that my parents are doing such a thing is absolutely laughable.   I am sorry it's not in regards to those you know.  

Well, of course I’m coming at it from my own perspective. I think we all do that, right? 

My point was not to bust on your folks. It was just to say I can understand feeling annoyed if I were the other grandma. It sounds like she handled it poorly and that was a shame and yes, it’s sad that the kid sensed that something was wrong because she got her dream presents. I’m just saying: I think it is understandable to be the irked grandma. I have been irked by other family members over-giving and trying to “win” at Christmas; there are people who absolutely do that because they want to be Most Awesome Auntie or whatever. 

Peace out. I got really good cancer news today and I’m not trying to wreck anyone’s happiness. ✌️

[Momto6inIN]

My mom is an excessive giver. Our 1st DS was her first grandchild and she went ... more than a little overboard. I remember that first Christmas that he was able to unwrap gifts himself, he actually walked away from the pile of presents and could not be enticed to come open any more ? Mom was disappointed, to say the least.

Anytime she bought expensive battery operated toys that made a lot of noise we just didn't ever put batteries in them and the kids never knew the difference. Leap frog letter factory still helped them learn their letters, just not out loud LOL When our last DD was a toddler we pulled out one of those activity tables she had given one of them and my older kids were all, "Hey I remember that toy! Wait, why is there a battery compartment? It never made noise when we played with it?" And I was all, "Shhhhh! Don't tell her and she won't know!" ???

My mom frequently overshadows what we do as parents for our kids as far as gifts go and I have definitely resented it in the past. We have had frequent talks about it and she is getting better and trying to improve, but I still get annoyed by all the "stuff". I know she is not trying to buy anyone's love, and I love that she cares for my kids, but I do feel like her role as a grandparent buying gifts should be fundamentally different than her role as a parent was.

[Kareni]

23 hours ago, texasmom33 said:

My SIL keeps buying my kids things like this on her trips to Mexico and giving them as Xmas gifts. We've gotten iguanas, owls, monkeys- you name it. They completely freak my kids out though, and Goodwill is probably wondering why every Christmas they have an influx of Mexican folk art donations...... But I'm seriously not going to complain anymore after this thread. The dirty dolls, boxes and hooker cats have definitely given me some perspective!! ?

My daughter loves owls.  If I saw this at the local Goodwill, I'd happily buy it!  (It's the old "one man's trash is another man's treasure!")

Regards,
Kareni

[Shoeless]

22 hours ago, happysmileylady said:

Why DO people feel the need to "win" the holidays?!?!  Isn't it really about making the kids happy in these sorts of celebrations.  

 

 

Unbridled insecurity.          

 

[Shoeless]

.

Edited October 4, 2020 by MissLemon

[Kareni]

1 hour ago, texasmom33 said:

Good to know! The holidays are imminent. If another one arrives I will ship it to you postage paid as my little win win. You get an owl, my kids don’t wake up screaming at midnight. ?

Sounds good to me!

1 hour ago, texasmom33 said:

I hear she’s going on a cruise for Thanksgiving so who knows what she’ll bring back! It’s fifty-fifty if it’s animal folk art or else absurdly large iron crosses. At least that’s where my moneys at.  

I'll await your report with interest.  Cruising sounds like a fun way to spend Thanksgiving in any event.

Regards,
Kareni

[Amber in SJ]

My MIL is hilarious with the Christmas presents.  As in you have to laugh so you won't get stabby.  

No matter what I said I didn't want the kids to have, that is what she would get.  If I said no toy guns that were realistic looking, my three girls would get toy weapons that could fool my SWAT BIL.  If I said I wasn't a fan of Barbie then my girls would get a collection of Barbies and any clothes that would make Barbie look like a mini-hooker.  She would stare at me with a smirk on her face while the kids were opening presents.  I did figure out what was going on pretty quickly so one year I expressed my opinion that I didn't want a DVD player for the car because I would rather read-aloud to the kids during long car trips.  That year the kids got a really nice portable DVD player and a collection of movies that I am pretty sure I made up some reason not to allow.  

That all ended once my last child (a boy) was born.  My daughters no longer got actual presents.  The year ds was two he got 11 presents from grandma and each daughter (4, 9 & 12) each got a chapstick from the gas station down the street and an antenna ball from Jack-in-the Box next door.  She also tried to convince me that because she raised 3 sons and I had only had girls until that point that I should leave ds with her to raise.  He was a nursing infant at the time.

But she is nuts, so we ignore & move along.

The PP whose mom buys oddities from her vacation, reminded me of the time my FIL & his new wife (not my MIL) gave all the grandkids souvenirs from their honeymoon to Mexico.  The other grandkids received wood carvings, silver jewelry and woven blankets.  My four children received four frog figures, one each, that were different parts of a mariachi band.  But here's the thing; they were real frogs.  Dead frogs, whose guts had been removed, then inflated, lacquered, dressed in clothes, had little instruments placed in their arms and their feet nailed to little wooden stands.  My children were horrified.  It was disgusting.  My FIL thought they were so cool, and he thought the kids would be so excited.  I wanted to toss them as soon as we got home, but Dh thought his dad would be offended so I insisted that he keep them in the garage, far away from me.  

Amber in SJ

[Starfish]

20 hours ago, Momto5inIN said:

My mom is an excessive giver. Our 1st DS was her first grandchild and she went ... more than a little overboard. I remember that first Christmas that he was able to unwrap gifts himself, he actually walked away from the pile of presents and could not be enticed to come open any more ? Mom was disappointed, to say the least.

Anytime she bought expensive battery operated toys that made a lot of noise we just didn't ever put batteries in them and the kids never knew the difference. Leap frog letter factory still helped them learn their letters, just not out loud LOL When our last DD was a toddler we pulled out one of those activity tables she had given one of them and my older kids were all, "Hey I remember that toy! Wait, why is there a battery compartment? It never made noise when we played with it?" And I was all, "Shhhhh! Don't tell her and she won't know!" ???

My mom frequently overshadows what we do as parents for our kids as far as gifts go and I have definitely resented it in the past. We have had frequent talks about it and she is getting better and trying to improve, but I still get annoyed by all the "stuff". I know she is not trying to buy anyone's love, and I love that she cares for my kids, but I do feel like her role as a grandparent buying gifts should be fundamentally different than her role as a parent was.

 

The bolded is sheer genius!  

[scholastica]

11 hours ago, Amber in SJ said:

My MIL is hilarious with the Christmas presents.  As in you have to laugh so you won't get stabby.  

No matter what I said I didn't want the kids to have, that is what she would get.  If I said no toy guns that were realistic looking, my three girls would get toy weapons that could fool my SWAT BIL.  If I said I wasn't a fan of Barbie then my girls would get a collection of Barbies and any clothes that would make Barbie look like a mini-hooker.  She would stare at me with a smirk on her face while the kids were opening presents.  I did figure out what was going on pretty quickly so one year I expressed my opinion that I didn't want a DVD player for the car because I would rather read-aloud to the kids during long car trips.  That year the kids got a really nice portable DVD player and a collection of movies that I am pretty sure I made up some reason not to allow.  

That all ended once my last child (a boy) was born.  My daughters no longer got actual presents.  The year ds was two he got 11 presents from grandma and each daughter (4, 9 & 12) each got a chapstick from the gas station down the street and an antenna ball from Jack-in-the Box next door.  She also tried to convince me that because she raised 3 sons and I had only had girls until that point that I should leave ds with her to raise.  He was a nursing infant at the time.

But she is nuts, so we ignore & move along.

The PP whose mom buys oddities from her vacation, reminded me of the time my FIL & his new wife (not my MIL) gave all the grandkids souvenirs from their honeymoon to Mexico.  The other grandkids received wood carvings, silver jewelry and woven blankets.  My four children received four frog figures, one each, that were different parts of a mariachi band.  But here's the thing; they were real frogs.  Dead frogs, whose guts had been removed, then inflated, lacquered, dressed in clothes, had little instruments placed in their arms and their feet nailed to little wooden stands.  My children were horrified.  It was disgusting.  My FIL thought they were so cool, and he thought the kids would be so excited.  I wanted to toss them as soon as we got home, but Dh thought his dad would be offended so I insisted that he keep them in the garage, far away from me.  

Amber in SJ

I am horrified that your mil weaponized gift giving to your children this way. Plenty of people try to win Christmas, but this is a whole other level of evil.

Edited October 25, 2018 by scholastica