Ugh. Should we consider a dog??

[Moxie]

I really really dislike dogs. They shed, slobber, poop and smell bad.

 

But, I have a SN kid who is emotionally attached to television. When we turn it off (there are time limits) he will sometimes get very upset about us taking away his best friend (don't suggest that we remove it completely). Very upset.

 

I wonder if a dog or cat would give him a healthy emotional attachment??

[milovany]

Not a typical dog vs. cat issue (considering the needs of your son), but I definitely say cat if you don't like dogs. I don't either (too much hassle when you want to go away for the day or on vacation; too much daily interaction needed); a cat is infinitely easier. But if you get an aloof cat, s/he may not fulfill your sons needs, either.  Ours spends the day outside pretty much and when she's in, she's not interested in being social.  In the evenings, she's different and does like to cuddle up on my lap.  Maybe get a cat with a year or two on her/him so you know in which category they are. 

[sunflowerlady]

I would not get a dog if you dislike them that strongly. Not fair to the dog. 

 

I would look for other options. 

 

I wish I could help you more with other ideas, but I know the others here will have some great suggestions. :001_smile:

[Tsuga]

I do not think it would be healthy for a family in which one influential member hates dogs, to get a dog. The dog deserves more.

 

Siamese cats are very social and even part-siamese (not purebred) can be a very good companion.

[Annie Anne]

I really really dislike dogs. They shed, slobber, poop and smell bad.

 

But, I have a SN kid who is emotionally attached to television. When we turn it off (there are time limits) he will sometimes get very upset about us taking away his best friend (don't suggest that we remove it completely). Very upset.

 

I wonder if a dog or cat would give him a healthy emotional attachment??

 

I think so. The creature will respond to him where a TV does not.

There are many dogs that don't shed and are wonderful companions.

If you search carefully, you might find a breeder who is willing to train a pup for you. It will be house broken and all you have to do is learn his ways.

 

[goldberry]

I also think a cat might not work well.  Even affectionate cats decide on their own when to be affectionate.  They are not always "reliable" as companions, which might be frustrating to your son.  

 

What about an organization that helps match dogs with SN kids?  That might be a great way to get a well trained and likable dog who could win your heart without you having to go though all the training work.  

 

My husband is not big on dogs either (we have cats), but there have been a few dogs, well trained with great personalities, that he admits he could come to like.  

[plansrme]

A house-trained adult dog of an appropriate breed would only shed, most likely. Indoor dogs generally do not smell, poop inside or slobber (unless you get a Newfy, maybe). If you can get over a little dog hair that you will probably clean up in your daily routine, you might actually find that you like dogs. Well, your dog; you might never like other people's dogs, because they won't be as awesome as yours. Does your son engage with anyone else's dog? The bond between a boy and his dog can be a beautiful thing, but I would worry that your opinion of dogs might taint his opinion as well.

[Guest]

Ha! My opinion of pets has never kept my children from begging for one.

[Guest]

He does not do well with dogs but we've never been around a well-trained dog. My FIL gets trained dogs and teaches them to lick plates and jump on furniture. So gross!!

[OneStepAtATime]

No pet will be perfect.  If you really hate dogs, I would not get a dog.  That just wouldn't be fair to you or the dog.  Pets are work and commitment, but can have a huge positive impact.

 

A cat might very well work.  We have had many cats over the years (as well as dogs), and if you spend time loving them and caring for them, they can be quite affectionate.  We have had several that even come when called (but not all :) ).  

 

But start with them as a kitten.  Make sure your son has a chance to pet and play with maybe a litter of kittens.  Check out the interaction.  Try to find one that is active but not overly so, and friendly.  Cats are infinitely easier to take care of than a dog.  And if you get an automatic litter box that is connected to the plumbing, like maybe a Cat Genie, you don't have the litter box issue.  Plus, if you keep them strictly indoors you don't end up with big vet bills for cat fighting injuries, you don't run the risk of dealing with feline aids and feline leukemia, etc. (Normally, I prefer an indoor/outdoor cat for various reasons but in this case you might be better off with just an indoor only cat).  

 

I would suggest considering not just one, but maybe two kittens.  Cats can get lonely (contrary to popular belief).  If they grow up together there is less likelihood they will fight.  Cats that get along like to groom each other, play and sleep together, etc.  And this way if one is in a bad mood, your son can still pet and care for the other.

[MercyA]

He does not do well with dogs but we've never been around a well-trained dog.

 

If he doesn't have a natural affection for dogs, I probably wouldn't get him one, especially considering your feelings towards them.

 

Most dogs don't slobber.  Dogs don't smell when they are bathed regularly, and that cuts down on the shedding, too.  Yes, all animals poop. 

 

A cat might work well for him.  Some can be very affectionate and playful.  ETA:  I've thought about this some more, and I agree with the others.  If pet waste and shedding bother you so much, I wouldn't recommend a cat, either.  I'm sorry!   

 

Hope you find something that helps!  

[Liz CA]

A dog as an experiment and you hate dogs??The poor dog. How do you feel about a dwarf rabbit or something like that. A rat? Rabbits  can get very attached to their people and I have never seen one slobber...however anything with a metabolism usually poops.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Please don't get a dog.  Or a rabbit.  Perhaps fish.  

 

We did get our Aspie a cat when he was 12.  BUT I know how to care for cats and was very thorough in training him to take care of the cat.  He loves his cat but the cat does not get him off the computer (his own obsession).  The cat did help him to learn to care for another living creature and to consider it's needs.  The cat brings him some joy.  But the cat is not a substitute for friends or stimulation or anything else.  And sometimes the cat is gross because all living creatures are sometimes gross, esp. if they get sick.  The trick at that point is to consider it's needs and to get it appropriate care.  

[Plink]

Dog training has helped my autistic child immensely, BUT I don't think you should get a dog.  

 

Mom is responsible for all dog care, no matter what everyone else insists, so this would a huge imposition on you.  If you don't like dogs, you will be creating a lot of resentment.  Don't get a dog.  It isn't fair to you, or the animal.

 

Does he generally interact with animals for a long period of time when you are near them? If so, try a rabbit or cat, but if he generally ignores them then you aren't going to gain anything for your efforts.  

 

The stimulation of TV is hard to compete with.  I wish I had more ideas for you.

 

 

[SebastianCat]

When we were thinking about getting a dog, the best advice I heard was, Don't get a dog unless "MOM" really wants a dog.    ("Mom" being defined as whichever parent does most of the childcare and household chores.)   No matter how much you want a pet to be "for the children," the entire weight of the pet's care will fall on you.   Adding a dog to your family will be almost like adding another child.    Until you are emotionally prepared to invest that much time and effort into caring for and bonding with a dog, don't get one.

 

It took me about 2 years of "thinking about getting a dog" until we got our dog.   I absolutely love her to death, but she requires a lot of attention and work.

[sassenach]

No, I wouldn't.

[KungFuPanda]

A dog is NOT the answer to this problem.  A dog is ANOTHER problem. I'm a dog person.  I love my dog, but having him doesn't keep my kids from wanting other things.  

[Catwoman]

He does not do well with dogs but we've never been around a well-trained dog. My FIL gets trained dogs and teaches them to lick plates and jump on furniture. So gross!!

Everything you have posted leads me to strongly believe you should not get a dog.

 

You used words like "ugh," "hate," and "gross" to describe dogs. I think you have answered your own question.

[Pawz4me]

I really really dislike dogs. They shed, slobber, poop and smell bad.

 

But, I have a SN kid who is emotionally attached to television. When we turn it off (there are time limits) he will sometimes get very upset about us taking away his best friend (don't suggest that we remove it completely). Very upset.

 

I wonder if a dog or cat would give him a healthy emotional attachment??

 

No judgments, but I don't think you should get a dog.  Or a cat.

 

Most dogs don't slobber.

 

Many dogs don't shed, or shed so minimally you don't notice.

 

With the exception of the hound breeds, a healthy, properly bathed/groomed dog who is fed a good diet should not smell.  With the exception of the hound breeds, most dogs that smell do so due to owner neglect or ignorance.

 

All cats except the hairless breeds shed.  Cleaning a litter box is IMO much worse than dealing with dog poop.

 

I think bringing a pet into your family when you obviously don't want one would be hugely unfair to the pet.  They're living, breathing, feeling creatues who deserve better than a home where the chief caregiver barely tolerates them.

[kristi26]

I really really dislike dogs. They shed, slobber, poop and smell bad.

 

But, I have a SN kid who is emotionally attached to television. When we turn it off (there are time limits) he will sometimes get very upset about us taking away his best friend (don't suggest that we remove it completely). Very upset.

 

I wonder if a dog or cat would give him a healthy emotional attachment??

 

 

 

I wouldn't get a dog if you detest them. It doesn't sound like it's the best idea for your family...

[plansrme]

He does not do well with dogs but we've never been around a well-trained dog. My FIL gets trained dogs and teaches them to lick plates and jump on furniture. So gross!!

 

If this grosses you out, a dog probably isn't for you.

[kroe1]

No matter how many dogs I have bought over the years for my kids, the dogs always end up being my dogs.

 

Northern breeds do not smell,but they shed. Consider a Klee Kai.

[kroe1]

No matter how many dogs I have bought over the years for my kids, the dogs always end up being my dogs.

 

Northern breeds do not smell or drool, but they shed. Consider a Klee Kai.

[Valley Girl]

Definitely don't get a dog. It's not fair to the dog, and it's not fair to you either. (Your feelings should matter.) If you think a pet would help, has your child expressed interest in a particular species? Maybe a smaller "pocket pet" animal would appeal to him and not be tons of work for you. If you're not 100% sure you want any kind of pet but just want to see how he responds with them, is there a neighbor pet or relative's animal that he could "help" take care of and play with?

[Catwoman]

Moxie, I hope my earlier post didn't come across as judgmental. I didn't mean it that way at all. I just meant that it's obvious you truly don't like dogs, and I think it is very smart that you recognize this and don't assume all will be fine as soon as you get one. I love dogs, but if you don't, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!

 

Also, even if you get a dog, there is no guarantee that the dog will bond with your ds. With your luck, the dog will adore you and hate everyone else in the family! ;)

 

I think it is admirable that you want to do something special for your son. I just don't think getting a dog is the right thing for your family, unless your feeling about dogs changes dramatically.

[Lanny]

All animals require care and love. "Dogs are mans best friend" is true, but if you do not like dogs, do not get a dog.  Someone once wrote, "to keep my ego in proper perspective, I have a dog to adore me and a cat to ignore me".  We have 8 dogs (outside) and 3 cats (mostly inside) and a Parrot (inside).  When my wife and DD went out of town on the 3rd, the Parrot was the hardest for me to care for. When I went out of town to join them on  the 8th, the Parrot was my biggest concern.  The 2 kittens frequently are near me when I am here in the office and sometimes in my lap, but cats choose their people and when they want to be touched.    

[Tammyla]

No, you shouldn't get a dog, but I understand where your heart is. :grouphug:

 

The right cat (if you like them) might be a good fit for your family.  

[Outdoorsy Type]

Maybe take a trip to the Humane Society and let him volunteer to socialize the cats or other animals? That would give you an idea about of he is ready, and what animal would best suit you both.

[Incognito]

It sounds to me like a pet rat or mouse could be a good fit.  Rats are bigger and tougher, and they are both intelligent, trainable, affectionate, and have short life spans. :)

 

I strongly recommend you stay away from dogs.

 

 

[lmrich]

It will be your  dog; it doesn't sound like you would like a dog. 

 

That being said, my mini poodle does not shed or drool - she of course goes to the bathroom.... 

[Renthead Mommy]

No, you should most definately not get a dog.  Or a cat.  Maybe a fish.  

[hornblower]

No you shouldn't.

 

Animals all have their own special needs and requirements and frankly, I don't think you should be thinking of one as a replacement for an appliance.

Maybe, maybe a fish tank. Maybe. If you're willing to do all the upkeep and if your child can handle the fact that even with really well maintained large tanks you do get fish occasionally dying.

I don't think any mammals. I have rats, dogs, recently lost a cat to old age, used to have hamsters. All of these animals require care, love, affection, vet visits... and they need to be wanted.

Do not get any animal unless you want to have the pet, keep it for the duration for its life, give it all the basic necessities, provide it with affection and attention.

fwiw, children slobber, poop, are needy, frequently smell bad. I know lots of people who choose to only have pets and don't understand why anyone would have a child ;) 


 

[indigomama]

A little over a year ago, we got a cat hoping it would help with DS who has anxiety. Well, it turns out our cat hates people! So, no I would never get a cat again, though we still have ours and he is a permanent member of the family, he won't be replaced.

 

We also wanted a dog, we met several, and I mean several, from all ages and breeds. It was over a year before we found the most perfect dog. She was in a rescue group, 2 1/2 and is a Chesapeake Bay Retriever/ Labrador mix. She sheds like crazy, but she is soooooo gentle and loving with everyone and everything. We all adore her, and she sleeps in the boys' room at night. It helped DS, but she is still way more work and responsibility to be considered his dog. She is my dog, and I share  :D

[JustEm]

Nope. The dog will ultimately be your responsibility and if you dislike dogs that is not a good combo.

[gardenmom5]

All animals require care and love. "Dogs are mans best friend" is true, but if you do not like dogs, do not get a dog.  Someone once wrote, "to keep my ego in proper perspective, I have a dog to adore me and a cat to ignore me".  

 

dogs have owners.  cats have staff.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Even if you absolutely adored animals, I don't think that an animal would solve your problem.  Your problem is either one of addiction (which you don't want to consider) or it is one of transitioning or it is one of routine.  I actually vote for addiction, which is very common in kids on the spectrum.  We've been there.  Since you don't want to consider giving up the television, then you need to work on providing cues for transition before the time runs out and the t.v. needs to be turned off.  And you need to teach him what to do when it goes off.  Perhaps a soothing activity that he likes could be part of your routine right after t.v. time.  There are therapeutic reasons why someone might want an animal but I don't see anything here that tells me that this is one of them.  

[MrsWeasley]

I see you have very young kids. This pretty much sums up why I won't ever have a dog while we have young children in the house: http://eileenanddogs.com/2015/04/07/posting-dog-and-baby-pictures/

 

[Pawz4me]

I see you have very young kids. This pretty much sums up why I won't ever have a dog while we have young children in the house: http://eileenanddogs.com/2015/04/07/posting-dog-and-baby-pictures/

 

While I don't disagree with the premise that any dog can bite, I strongly disagree with the quotes in that article that say (paraphrasing) "the dog bite came out of the blue" or "the dog had given no prior indication of behaving this way."  Those statements are almost always untrue.  Dogs almost always give clear signals.  It's just that most dog owners don't educate themselves (let alone their children) about canine body language and behavior and so they miss the signals that would be crystal clear to a trainer or even an educated owner.  Unfortunately, the dog almost always gets blamed for the human's ignorance.