The only thing that makes me want to quit HSing is the toddler

[Peplophoros]

Is there anything more frustrating than trying to read an excerpt from WWE for my dd with the toddler following me around and screaming in my ear?   Makes me want to throw the book into the garbage and send them all to school.

 

I'm the verge of tears, yet again.  

 

Yes, I know I should wait for a calm time to do one on one work (naptime), but I need that time for me, or I'll go insane.  Is this how HSing should look like?  Some days I feel like the atmosphere in our house is too crazy for all this.  I (and my other kids) rarely get a moment's peace from my 2yr old. 

 

:sad:

[jhschool]

Hang in there!

 

Get him Play Doh or something he loves--and tell him he can have it 

OVER THERE.  (Across the room or something.)  Or let him make a mess

with something within earshot.

Something that my toddler used to love was spreading a box of baking soda

all over the living room and dining room carpet.

It took him a while and I would have some time to do something.

Later I would just vacuum it.  It gave him a thrill to be allowed to make a mess

so he put his focus on that.  He didn't know it wasn't really a problem!

 

Or--I know this is bad--pop in a video and plop him in front of it.  In my day

I did Blue's Clues or something--I don't know what toddlers do nowadays.  I

know it's bad for them, but it won't hurt him and you'll get 30 minutes of peace.

 

Final idea:  get a mother's helper to come and play with him?  They are not

expensive and you can keep checking on them to see that all is well.

[Peplophoros]

That was one of the most challenging times for me. 

 

You do have to get used to being interrupted 100,000 times. 

 

:grouphug:

 

I don't mean to be negative (and obviously I'm having a bad day), but when does getting used to it not worth the stress?  Wouldn't my kids be better off in school (a very good public school) rather than being dragged through this (what seems to me to be) torture?

[Um_2_4]

Ah yes, the 2yo scream....memories (DS4 was non verbal at that age so he either had silent or Scream, he got better when he started talking at 3 1/2, now if I could only get him to pause for a moment)...

anyways..anything that holds his attention/distracts him??? water, playdough, duplos, a sensory bin, some crayons/paper, washable markers, those chunky stamps and a washable inkpad (art supplies in a high chair preferably, kids are washable, some furniture not so much)....??? ipad? phone? computer??(there is software to lock him onto one website or app if needed) Look for anything that will get you just 15-20 minutes at a time.

 

ETA: As far as your older kids, I am just now seeing as my kids get older (and I hope this continues) what a bond they have. My youngest 2 LOVE their older brother. And he is very connected to them. He relates very well with them. He can tell stories about when they were littler and used to cry a lot and mommy was so sleepy for sure.  If he had been away at school (he would have started public Kg right about when they were born), I don't think that closeness would be there as much. And my oldest daughter is very good with them also, patient, loves to "teach" them. My oldest 2 are very close. They have "sleepovers" on the weekend and her big brother watches over her. I think that closeness was helped along because of the shared experiences of homeschooling. I'm sure some siblings are close even if they go to brick and mortar school, but I'm just trying to say I don't think going through a season of a difficult to handle toddler will scar them permanently or stop them from getting into college. It may teach them to help out/patience, etc.

[Elisabet1]

Sorry.

 

Well, if it makes you feel better, you can ignore him and then things will all be great. 

 

(((hugs))))

[GinaPagnato]

Hsing with toddlers was THE WORST time in the world for me.

 

It was rough, I cried, I doubted, I improvised, I worried, I got angry. But  I did it. WE did it. It was totally worth it to hang on and hang in there. There are ways to distract and amuse them albeit for verrrrry short periods of time. Play around with the schedule and the activities, but hang in there. It gets better!

 

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

[Gil]

Can you send the toddler to PreK?

[Jaybee]

One thing that helped when I had two school aged kids and twin toddlers was to give the toddlers personal attention first. We cuddled on the couch and read a couple of books, and maybe did another thing or two. It paid off hugely by making them feel loved, and then they were usually happy to play while I worked with the olders. They didn't feel so shuffled off. If I forgot, we suffered for it. :P This may or may not work with yours. 

[MeAndTheBoys]

When I had a two year old, it was more chaotic for sure--my older boys were 7 and 8.  Some kids are louder than others!  I do know my younger learned to play in his room for short periods, my older boys had breaks to go play with him, etc.

 

It might be beneficial to work on teaching him to entertain himself and be quiet--it will pay off later.  I don't think we had too much interruption from DS3 when he was 3 and esp 4--he learned to play quietly.  This year, he is doing schoolwork (he's 5) but when he's not, he sits in the room with us and just plays.

 

He knows that if he's quiet, he can stay in the "fun room" where the action is.  If he's loud, he has to go somewhere else (and there's nothing worse for a youngest than to be ALONE when everyone else it TOGETHER).

 

It's hard with a 2 year old, but any little bits of training you can get in to help play independently and quietly will pay off tremendously later.

 

I did consider putting DS3 in a mother's day out--sounds like that might help you out, if it is an option.

 

Betsy

[lots of little ducklings]

Baby gates have been my saving grace, especially as my oldest can't function at all with distraction. I just pop my 2 yo in a baby proofed room (within ear shot of our schoolroom, though I'd use a quiet monitor if our house was larger.) None of my dc loved being "alone" at first, but they quickly adjusted to playing independently, a great skill to learn, IMO, and far more valuable than tv, though tv can be a lifesaver on occasion too. :-)

[Night Elf]

:grouphug: :grouphug:

[Vida Winter]

Those years are so hard, but please try to see the good through your frustration. Can you assign one child to play with your toddler while you work with the other child? We used to take a nice long walk in the morning to let the kids run around before we got started with schoolwork. That tires out the little ones and they can settle down, maybe take a nap after a snack and the rest of you can be productive. Draw shapes with nice fat lines and give your toddler a sheet of stickers to stick inside the shape. Set up a plastic dishpan with a little warm soap and water and let them "wash" dishes. It's so tempting to put them in school - we tried it - and it always caused other problems. The child in school caught every illness that was going around, passing it on to the rest of the kids and the baby.  One of the main reasons we homeschooled early on was the endless illness cycle.

[AimeeM]

I am absolutely with you. I am fairly dreading this fall, as happy as I am to have DD home. My almost 2 year old DS climbs out of all baby proofing attempts (gates, play pens, etc), likes to attempt carnival stunts off furniture, and when all else fails to get my attention (although usually the high wire attempts get my attention - and quickly), he resorts to throwing himself on the hardwood floors in full tantrum mode, banging his head (not on purpose; just the result of flinging himself backwards and having hardwood floors). He is a busy, busy, BUSY boy!!! Lol.

[MercyA]

I might get flamed for this, but I see nothing wrong with letting a toddler watch an episode or two of a good tv show.  A bit of peace is a wonderful thing.  ;)   At that age, we liked Curious Buddies DVD's.  They are gentle, wholesome, funny, and mildly educational.

 

Have some special toys that only come out during school time.  I love the ideas that previous posters have shared--water tubs, stickers, and Play Doh are all great.  A bean bin also worked well for us.  Fill a tub full of dry beans, add some toy vehicles and animals, measuring cups, and measuring spoons, and a 2-year-old should be happy for a while.

 

This too shall pass.  Good luck!   :grouphug:  

[Peplophoros]

I might get flamed for this, but I see nothing wrong with letting a toddler watch an episode or two of a good tv show.  A bit of peace is a wonderful thing.  ;)   At that age, we liked Curious Buddies DVD's.  They are gentle, wholesome, funny, and mildly educational.

 

Have some special toys that only come out during school time.  I love the ideas that previous posters have shared--water tubs, stickers, and Play Doh are all great.  A bean bin also worked well for us.  Fill a tub full of dry beans, add some toy vehicles and animals, measuring cups, and measuring spoons, and a 2-year-old should be happy for a while.

 

This too shall pass.  Good luck!   :grouphug:  

 

No flames here--I would use the tv if I could, but my toddler WILL NOT WATCH TV--of any kind (sob).

[Peplophoros]

...and I did the bean thing--my nerves simply cannot handle the extra mess.  My house is a disaster as it is, and all my kids want to do is spread it around the entire. house. 

 

I think one room with a baby gate might be a good solution for us...but he's going to scream bloody murder. 

[strange_girl]

*raises hand*. I am right there with you. 2-year-olds are impossible to HS with. Every single day, we go through the same screaming, havoc-raising, mess-making routine. School gets done, but the toddler cries a lot and the house is trashed every day. He's a well-behaved toddler, too. He's just...a toddler. He's also a Dennis the Menace type, lol.

 

But I made up my mind that we are going to homeschool no matter what, and that toddler is going to just have to deal with it. Take a chill pill, kid, 'cause this is the way life is going to be. He is welcome to sit on my lap and snuggle, but if he doesn't want to do that he has to entertain himself. My entire focus cannot and should not be on him all day (though he would love that).

 

He gets plenty of time with me reading and snuggling and playing and tickling when it's not school time.

 

Do you have an iPad? Mine loves to play games on my iPad. Keeps him busy and keeps the older two motivated to get done so they can watch :)

It's definitely a learning curve for them. They do learn, eventually, that they can be fine while you're working.

[Dmmetler]

Is there an MDO program that would give you a few hours a couple of days a week of peace? I used one when DD was that age so I could work part-time, and it was mostly just playing in a playroom and outside, next to other kids. DD's gymnastics gym has an MDO program for 3-5 yr olds that I wish they'd had when she was that age, because it's mostly supervised playtime in the gym for a few hours a couple of days a week, but I don't think they take 2 yr olds.

[*Jessica*]

This is by far the biggest challenge I have had with homeschooling. My daughter will be 3 in August. This age was the hardest for me with both of her brothers, as well, and I didn't have homeschooling to deal with at the time. I live with a near-constant stress headache from trying to manage school, a relatively tidy house, meals, shopping for a child with food sensitivities, spending quality time with the toddler, and carving out moments for myself, not to mention spending the occasional hour hanging out with my husband! I still think homeschooling is worth it for my family, but I do dream of sending the toddler to daycare or something! I live in a small town, though, with no good options. If the next year continues to be this difficult, though, I may send her to preK when she's 4, just so we can get some quiet. Is preschool an option for you?

[IfIOnly]

I know one mom who has her older children rotate taking care of the toddler while she schooled.  She also changed the activity every time a sibling had their turn playing/hanging out with him.  That made all the difference in the world in her homeschool/sanity.

 

Personally, I'm not that organized.  We just do the majority of our homeschooling when the toddler naps.   :)

[solascriptura]

Can you put on a DVD for him? It's not ideal, but better than going insane. Truly, I know how you feel.

[Katy]

I second the baby gated play room.  And yes, it might take a few weeks of loud screaming.  But they'll either learn to play by themselves OR they'll take an additional nap.

[freesia]

It will pass, really, really. And then, honestly, it will be a faded memory. Honestly, I have homeschooled through 2 toddlers and my kids are doing fine academically.

 

With my fourth I finally did the following at 2:

One warning with an expectation, ie "you need to stop climbing on us while we are reading" and then swooped her into her room with a babygate until I was done with that teaching session (read aloud, spelling lesson, etc). Yes, she hated it, but she did learn to stop doing what I had asked her to stop doing. And I didn't have to do it very much bc she totally got it. I'm not saying things were super easy after that (I did keep her moving--water play in the sink, bucket of oatmeal on a table cloth, time with siblings) but she stopped enough of the annoying behavior that I didn't feel on edge and losing my temper all the time.

 

It is also likely that soon you can use TV. We are a very limited TV family, but I do allow it for short toddler sitting purposes. My youngest 2 learned more from Cat in the Hat Knows Alot about That than I could ever have imagined.

[mathnerd]

ipad/iphone apps for toddlers - there are a ton of them for identifying colors, shapes, pictures etc. That should keep him busy for a while. Also, audio books, play doh, puzzles, art supplies, coloring, cutting, sensory bins etc.

[M&M]

I feel your pain. I spent many years homeschooling with toddlers that didn't want to cooperate. Things that works for me were, games that toddler could play in the highchair (example Cheerios, shaving cream, finger painting with pudding). I put together special activities toddle could do at table with us or on the floor. I think I had a book called Preschooler Activities in A Bag with lots of ideas. I would team older children up with toddler and rotate. That way toddler always had a playmate and I could do some one on one with each child.

 

I also picked things like audiobooks that we could all participate in it together. Toddlers always had a safe area to play - gated. I made sure that toddlers got my attention first each day.

 

Some days chaos ruled and I just tried to deal with each crisis as it came up. Experienced moms told me to remember that homeschooling is a marathon not a sprint. Just keep swimming! One day at a time. Take a break, go to the park, play, sometimes we would "mop the floor" (everyone in socks with a bit of water on the kitchen floor). Find the joy in each day. Don't give up!

[Jennifer132]

We have two two year olds, so I definitely have experience with this. We taught ours blanket time. Basically you get a blanket and some interesting toys and you teach them to stay quietly on it and play. We do blankie time every single day for school. It keeps me sane. Your other option is to wait until naptime. What I think you have to come to grips with is that (at least for us) we chose homeschooling for a reason--we believe it to be superior to public school for our children and we believe it best for them academically, spiritually and emotionally-- and having a toddler put a wrench in things doesn't change our reasons for choosing this lifestyle. So we had to come to accept that these toddlers were here and find creative solutions to juggling both. :)

[momto10blessings]

I feel for you. My 2 year old is SO loud! We just discovered that he loves those dot markers. They'll keep him busy for 15 minutes. Play dough will only last 5 minutes.

[IfIOnly]

It will pass, really, really. And then, honestly, it will be a faded memory. Honestly, I have homeschooled through 2 toddlers and my kids are doing fine academically.

 

With my fourth I finally did the following at 2:

One warning with an expectation, ie "you need to stop climbing on us while we are reading" and then swooped her into her room with a babygate until I was done with that teaching session (read aloud, spelling lesson, etc). Yes, she hated it, but she did learn to stop doing what I had asked her to stop doing. And I didn't have to do it very much bc she totally got it. I'm not saying things were super easy after that (I did keep her moving--water play in the sink, bucket of oatmeal on a table cloth, time with siblings) but she stopped enough of the annoying behavior that I didn't feel on edge and losing my temper all the time.

 

It is also likely that soon you can use TV. We are a very limited TV family, but I do allow it for short toddler sitting purposes. My youngest 2 learned more from Cat in the Hat Knows Alot about That than I could ever have imagined.

 

 

My younger kids learned their letter sounds from the Leap Frog DVDs.  When it came to time for reading lessons, the kids who had a steady diet of Leap Frog flew through their lessons and had less struggle.  We have all of the DVDs.

 

http://www.amazon.com/LeapFrog-Letter-Factory-Ginny-Westcott/dp/B001TKUXUC/ref=pd_bxgy_mov_img_y

 

http://www.amazon.com/LeapFrog-Talking-Roy-Allen-Smith/dp/B001U7NW20/ref=pd_cp_mov_1

[Veritaserum]

I've got an almost-2yo and he makes things hard. I've homeschooled through toddlers before and I don't remember it being this hard. :-/

 

I buy a bit of silence with special school-time puzzles, blocks, cars, stacking cups, big Legos, etc. Each thing only lasts 5-10 minutes. It is maddeningly frustrating be interrupted constantly with noises and screams and thrown toys.

 

But it does pass. Eventually. I figure it will be another year of hell. I'm looking at adjusting which programs we use next year (more child-directed instead of me needing to be right there constantly). It's not my preference as a teacher, but teaching with a toddler is impossible some days!

 

The older kids do periodically ask if they can have a turn playing with him. I use those opportunities to teach math with someone or cover some other skill topic.

 

I am so, so ready for summer break!

[PhotoGal]

We just added a two year old to our family, so I understand! It is tough.

 

We had to postpone or drop a lot of teacher-intensive curricula/activities. Maybe you could postpone WWE until next fall. Instead, have the kids listen to an audio book and then ask them a few quick questions. Look for other things they can do independently - handwriting practice, some science things (give them a challenge - like building a bridge out of straws and see how many wooden blocks it can hold, then try another bridge and see if it holds more or less blocks), some art projects (coloring in a fancy design), math fact practice for the olders, listen to music from different composers or from different countries, play with letters/word magnets etc. Think of a classroom teacher who has 30 kids - she can't be right there discussing everything with every child. It is okay to take a step back and have the big kids doing some things on their own for this season. :)

 

In general, I would focus on getting the older kids to be a little more independent so you can attend to the 2 year old. Most kids this age are too young to consistently play on their own. There may be times that a 2 year old is highly engaged in something - the trouble is that it isn't always predictable! Something that works one day may not work the next. With maturity and practice, eventually playing alone will be more consistent and last for longer periods. Hang in there!

 

Definitely take that nap time to relax and recharge!

[Veritaserum]

Oh, and I plan to send him to preschool when he's three and four just to keep him busy for a few hours a couple of times per week! I did PreK with my next youngest last year. She had a great time and I didn't have to worry about keeping her occupied with something appropriate.

[rocassie]

I feel your frustration.  I have a 2.5yo.  Everything is stacked beyond his reach (well really his reach and whatever he can move to get higher) and therefore disorganized in haphazard piles.  I try and include him but he wants all the attention on himself.  It is challenging.  I keep repeating to myself, "It shall pass."  :)

[MiMi 4under3]

Is there anything more frustrating than trying to read an excerpt from WWE for my dd with the toddler following me around and screaming in my ear?   

 

Yes!

 

Two toddlers... or three.   :laugh:

[Truscifi]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

I feel your pain. I have an almost 2 yo who doesn't like to watch tv. He runs around getting into everything. All the time. We mostly do school while he naps, but the naps are starting to get shorter. I've been thinking about having dh cut his door in half so I can have the top open to watch him while the bottom is shut to keep him contained. Baby gates don't work for him because the little stinker just figures out how to unlatch them.

[Desert Strawberry]

We have a whole cabinet of school time toys. I have a rocking chair at the table in case someone needs extra closeness. We have an attached playroom for when someone gets a little too zesty. At one point we had three playpens scattered around our small house.

It does get better. I promise.

[lineinthesand9]

Toddler twins here!  Our olders are each assigned a 30-min. time slot on our morning schedule -- playtime with the twins.  The olders love it because they can take a break from morning school work and build blocks or a fort with the twins (or do Play-doh, or paint, or play in the yard, or play "school" -- which is great time for bigger sibling to "play" teacher and teach shapes, colors, etc.) And, obviously, the twins love it because they get attention from the older siblings.  I agree with previous posters who mentioned the bond HSing creates among our kiddos.  Also, DH and I feel it is very important that all our kiddos learn the value of pitching-in to help our family run more smoothly.  The olders also help the little ones with simple chores, such as emptying their bedroom trashcans and putting away their own clean clothes that Mama has already folded.  Just some simple ideas to keep little hands busy, busy, busy!  

AND....after lunch, they nap.  (Hallelujah!!)        

[Ausmumof3]

We have a just turned two year old as well. It can be hard. For read aloud stuff I tip duplo out for all the kids while I read. The older two still absorb... If the work is over dd5 s head it keeps her from complaining and ds7 concentrates while building somehow. Depends on how distractible your kids are though. For maths he has an old used preschool maths book to scribble on and cuisenaire rods (he's not mouthy at all now). If we're doing geography he likes to spin the globe. Etc. basically for us it works best to incorporate him at some level in whatever we're doing. If he feels excluded then we have problems.

[Rachel]

What about breaking up your day? Could you wait until dad gets home to work on the more intense subjects? Or do it while the toddler eats breakfast and is occupied? Then feed the older ones breakfast after WWE is done? I know it's not ideal but it may help you get through until the toddler can entertain himself better.

[Meadowlark]

Ah...I can totally relate. Right now I have a 1 yr. old, a 2 yr. old, and a 3 yr. old (and 2 others that I'm schooling). It's rough. If you're not already doing it, give the toddler a quiet time in the morning. It's my saving grace. I put all 3 in their rooms, or cribs, turn on a cd that lasts 60 minutes, and give them a bin of toys. I have a different bin for each day of the week. I filled them with board books, electronic toys, puzzles, anything. They know they get to come out when the music is done, and then they get a snack. Then, we do a bit of school during naptime. The older kids have quiet time, which usually leaves introverted me with an hour of me time.

 

The rest of the day? Chaos. :-) I have just accepted that there IS a light at the end of the tunnel and if I can just power through, then someday I will get to an easier phase of life. Of course then, I'll be a blubbering mess because I'll so miss these sweet days of hugs and innocence. Point being, I'm trying to enjoy each phase as it comes because from what I understand, each phase offers it's share of challenges. So I'm trying to not wish these precious days away, but rather embrace them...challenges and all. So, remember, there are lots of moms pulling their hair out at exactly the same time as you, you're not alone! I think it will be so worth it in the end, which keeps me going every day.