katalaska Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 This concerns budgeting for Christmas and a reasonable amount for Secret Santa among family members. I am struggling with a situation that has recently presented itself. Dh's father is out of a job--again. In an effort to reduce Christmas spending this year, the youngest sibling (who still lives at home) has proposed that to take the financial load off the parents, we should do a gift swap with the adult children of the family. The amount is $150 per adult! While dh and I like the *idea* of a Secret Santa among the adults in the family (there are 14 altogether), we are cringing at the $150 amount. Part of that is we believe certain individuals cannot truly afford that kind of money and part is we cannot come up with gifts that someone else could buy for us that total that amount. So I'm curious what others' per person dollar amount for Christmas would work out to be. I'm going to go through our pictures from last Christmas and see if I can ballpark how much we actually spent (knowing that most of our stuff was bought on clearance or at thrift stores, so that skews the numbers downward somewhat). I can't figure out why I am cringing about this and need some perspective. I feel like our kids already have way too much stuff (and the kids, of which there are 8 total, are not being given the opportunity to Secret Santa their cousins) and I can't think of much that I would want (except household items that exceed $150) or need. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TraciWA Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We have a cap of $20 per person. And we only buy for the kids. My Sil and I made that agreement years ago. It makes Christmas much more affordable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dayle in Guatemala Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I'm not sure how to answer. If by immediate family you mean my personal family of dh and 3 dc, I would say we try to keep it at $100 per child depending on our income for that year. Sometimes it's less, but, usually never more. Now that they are getting older, things are little more expensive, but, we are determined to stick to the same limit. DH and I don't buy for each other, we make something for each other or we buy something we can enjoy together. As far as other members: brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, in-laws, parents, etc, we don't generally buy for them. We will send something to the kids--a game they can share, a movie they can share, or gift cards. We don't exchange with the adults. Noone can afford that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 Within my immediate family, we buy our kids 3 gifts only, just like the the three gifts baby Jesus received. Cost varies. As for extended family. No adults exchange gifts, we only buy for the kids and we usually spend about $40 per kid (but we only have 5 nieces and nephews). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Academy of Jedi Arts Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We spend between $200-300 on dd, about $100 each on dh's mom, dad, and brother, and for other gifts we usually spend $10-20 each. Dh and I spend about $100 each on each other- but sometimes we do that after Christmas to cut down on so many expenses all at holiday time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plain jane Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I try to control our spending overall and Christmas is only a small exception. We don't base our purchases on a dollar amount per person but we do get each child one big gift and then a few smaller ones to put in their stockings and so they can have a few gifts under the tree to open. I'll usually make the smaller gifts useful items- glitter pens or fancy hair accessories type thing. We do our best to make Christmas exciting for the littles without breaking the bank so we aim to spend $250 or less. This amount will buy gifts for 4 kids, 1 set of grandparents and the gifts dh and I get each other. Often, dh and I will go cheap on our gifts to each other (there really is little that we *need* anyways) so we can spend a bit more on the littles. For the grandparents, we usually make something homemade- either decorated frames, or a scrapbook of the year's activities etc. Minimal $$ spent but big on time!! As for other siblings and other family members, we usually just exchange cards. For various reasons we all agreed years ago that we wouldn't do gift exchanges at Christmas and this policy has worked nicely for us. We all feel loved and cherished without the added stress of trying to find the "perfect" gift - that usually ends up not being so perfect after all.:glare: As for me, I'm big on not having lots of useless "stuff." It sickens me each year when I see the (well intentioned) "junk" that gets given to the kiddos from various grandparents and family members. Ugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wendi Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We have 7 adults and 6 children that we buy for (besides the three of us); we have always kept those gifts to $15-$20 per person. We typically spend $100 on ds; what we spend on each other depends on the year (how much $$ we have, and if there is something "big" one of us wants/needs that year). For example, this year I am hankering for an iPod Touch ($300). I'm hoping maybe dh and my mom will go in together and buy it for me. (I teamed up with my mom last year to buy dh a new LCD monitor.) But usually we spend more like $75 on each other. Wendi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NevadaRabbit Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I can't figure out why I am cringing about this and need some perspective. I feel like our kids already have way too much stuff (and the kids, of which there are 8 total, are not being given the opportunity to Secret Santa their cousins) and I can't think of much that I would want (except household items that exceed $150) or need. LOL All I can think is, that youngest sibling who had this brilliant idea is makin' sure he gets a whopper of a gift this year, isn't he?! :D As the kids/nieces/nephews get older, we grown-ups have decided not to do Christmas gifts for ourselves. We get a couple gifts each for our nieces and nephews, and really put time and effort into finding something that fits their interests. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragons in the flower bed Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We all agreed last year to have a gift-free Christmas. I was probably one of the last to come around. I think there's meaning in demonstrating abundance at the peak of the scarce winter season. We'll still get gifts for our own kids, but otherwise, I think we're going to aim for a different sort of abundance, probably involving lights and food and time off from work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmgconner Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 Approximately $50 per child, but it does vary. We spend a bit more on our 12 year old than we do on our little ones. For our extended family, we do something similar to Secret Santa and have a $15 limit. $150 seems outrageous to me, but for some people, it wouldn't be much at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThelmaLou Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 For my kids, I spend $100 per child for wrapped gifts under the tree. I probably drop another $25-$50 for stuffing each child's stocking. Stockings are big around our house. As my kids get older, that $100 evaporates quickly, especially when they want things like ipods. For my younger boys, Legos are a big hit. You moms of boys know how expensive those can be. Once again, it doesn't take long to reach that $100 mark. My kids only receive gifts at Christmas and birthdays. Other than that, they have to spend money out their own pockets. None of them have jobs and they don't get allowance. They occasionally do odd jobs for small amounts of money. Outside of my husband and my kids, I only buy for my parents and my husband's mom. We probably spend $35-$45 apiece on them. Everyone else usually gets baked goods. One summer my husband's grandmother gave my husband a huge album full of original pictures from his dad's childhood. We have been taking 1 or two of these each year to a professional photo studio for restoration and then we have them burned onto a cd. After that we make prints, frame them and give them as gifts to my husband's siblings. They love it. For some reason, my dh's grandmother really wanted us to be in possession of the originals. But we really like to share with everyone. This has been an affordable way to do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BritAnnia Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I spend between $100-$150 for each of my dc and for Dh. That includes the usual gifts, plus some special edible treats for us to enjoy over the Christmas season, and stocking stuffers. We spend up to $100 for Dh's parents, sometimes the same for my parents. I try to find cheap but nice gifts for the american nieces and nephews. They're much younger than my own dc and I'll often purchase them a gift based on a theme such as an $8 book for each of them, or a $10 animal gift from the Zoo store. For Dh's aunts and uncles we have no set pattern of gift giving. Some years we have something to give, some years we do not. It's never a big deal and nothing is expected. Usually the gift will be something family oriented if we do give, not much monetary value. One year I made candles, another year it was a large cookie selection. Last year Dh spent a few dollars converting a recorded interview of his Grandfather to dvd's for each of the family members. We don't usually receive any gifts in return from aunts/uncles/dh's brothers and our dc do not usually receive anything either. I don't buy Christmas or birthday gifts for my english nieces/nephews or my siblings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beansprouts Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I am struggling with a situation that has recently presented itself. Dh's father is out of a job--again. In an effort to reduce Christmas spending this year, the youngest sibling (who still lives at home) has proposed that to take the financial load off the parents, we should do a gift swap with the adult children of the family. The amount is $150 per adult! I think $150 for my kids aunts and uncles is way too much. We also draw names among the grown siblings in dh's family and the gifts range from $20 to $50 depending on what each family can afford. My "immediate family" includes my dh and our children and it is not unusual to spend $100 to $200 per person depending on the age and needs. Last year we were in excellent shape financially and we spent about $1000. This year will probably be scaled back a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TexasRachel Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 LOL All I can think is, that youngest sibling who had this brilliant idea is makin' sure he gets a whopper of a gift this year, isn't he?! :D. That's exactly what I was thinking. That and spending $150 isn't a big deal when you don't have a mortgage. Or other people to buy for. Tell him/her to suck it up and lower the amount. I typically spend about $20 for my siblings. But we also buy for nieces and nephews. I try some years, and I think I will this, to make stuff instead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hsmamainva Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I have 1 married brother and my hubby has 3 married sisters. We always purchase something for my brother (and try to keep it under $50). For his three sisters and their husbands, we exchange names, so we only have to buy for 2 of them (and everyone keeps it below $50). We have 5 nieces and nephews and we buy for each of them (and everyone buys something for our children) and we keep that under $50. My parents are deceased, as is my father-in-law, but my husband and his sisters all pitch in to give a present to his mother (that's anywhere from $50 to $100). So that's roughly $500 on the immediate family .. but that doesn't count our own! My hubby and I usually spend around $100 on each other...and then around $100-$200 on each of the children. Christmas easily runs us at least $1000 every year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prairie~Phlox Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 With dh's family, there are four siblings total, we draw names & have to buy for that sibling family, the limit is $50-$75. In our own household, we spend maybe $25.00 a child (three children) but then we sometimes get one larger gift (last year it was an X-Box 360. This year we probably won't do a larger gift. Phlox Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plaid Dad Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We adults usually set a budget of $50 or $75 for each of us to spend on the other. I'm guessing we spend about $75-100 for dd, although dw makes a lot of gifts for her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoyfulMama Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We have three dc - plan for about $100 for gifts, plus max $25 per stocking. DH and I don't agree to a price - we just find something we think the other one will enjoy. We have only four other children that we buy for, and we do spend anywhere from $10 to $50 on them - the more is for two godchildren because they each get an small gift, an annual ornament and a bond). Between DH and I, we have 4 siblings, plus three spouses, and only one of those siblings has children. So we do buy for our siblings. I used to do $25 each, but that got to be too much. We also have three other dear couple/friends that we buy for. So now I try for $10-25 per person, and $25-30 per couple as a gift they can enjoy together - I've outlawed gift certificates in favor of something that I consider to be a luxery item (something that I would enjoy but wouldn't ordinarily spend money on). For our parents, I will go up to $50 per couple, but don't usually spend that much. For the rest, I do send out Christmas cards (cost stamps and photos/cards - which can cost another $100 all together). My oldest dc (7 now) has made gifts or gone shopping with her own money for gifts. She loves to have something that she can give to each of us. Our struggle is in regards to dear friends who don't have children. My college girlfriends and I always bought something small and little for eachother. But I am the first to have any children. So now they buy gifts for my children. We still exchange small gifts with eachother (something inexpensive but heartfelt), and I know that at some point I might be able to buy for their kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faithseed Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 This did not make for a very popular decision, but we just couldn't handle it any more. DH's family is living on debt- all of them, and they go wayyyyy overboard with Christmas gifts. It is actually a little gross. The oldest sister, especially, will literally rub her hands together and snatch the next gift while eagerly looking for the next one. Naturally, her children were learning that exact behavior. Anyway, year after year it was getting worse. We did the picking names out of a hat, and other ways of choosing names...until one year, about June, we all get an email stating who we were going to each be buying for- for the next 5 years! Then the budget came- $150 per adult assigned, $15 for all of the children for each family. So, if I were assigned my SIL, I would spend $150 on her, and $15 total on her two children. I was instructed that we would "make up" for the lack of gifts for children on birthdays. I lost it, and flipped my lid. It took all of the fun out of giving from the heart, along with countless other gripes I had with the "system". We just said that we were not going to participate anymore. That said, I did propose this idea. It was shot down by said SIL, but I still think that it is an excellent idea for someone else. Pick a time to get together (everyone) near Christmas time. Everyone bring food, drinks, games, whatever. Have a lot of quality family time. Then, have everyone bring their calendar- with important dates, already marked. Ask ahead of time for each family to think of a large project that needs to get done at their home. One by one, have the families tell their projects that are needed, and together plan *as a family* to all together help with that project one day throughout the year. At each family project, everyone bring food and a camera. Take pictures of all of the projects, eat and fellowship. Repeat next year, but add in everyone bringing their project pictures. Maybe this kind of family togetherness only exists in my dreamworld......but it sure sounds good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkle Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 In my family, generally we'll spend about $100-$150 per kid. For relatives on my side of the family (2 sisters, 2 BILs, 1 nephew), about $25-50 apiece. For dh's side of the family (2 parents, 5 siblings, plus assorted spouses and children) the limit is $5. OK, maybe a bit more for the kids, but for the adults we try to stick to a $5 limit, and homemade items are fine. A couple of times we did the Secret Santa and the limit was $50. I think $150 is an awful lot to spend on one person - puts a big burden on a family to come up with that kind of money, plus what could someone really need that costs that much? I sympathize because a couple of times we've had one person in dh's family suggest things like this (one year it was $200), and we had to refuse. It's not a fun feeling. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laylamcb Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 DH and I probably spend $10-50 per child on books, dress-up clothes, and train stuff primarily no set amount for each other (I buy him books; he buys me something random each year) For our families, it's a touchy subject. My family feels that Christmas presents ought to be for kids. Therefore, we adults exchange cards and/or food gifts and/or maybe a token something that we just couldn't NOT buy for the other person. Ditto for birthdays. DH LOVES this about my family. His family feels very differently. Christmas is a time to run up big debt in the name of love--that's the American way, people! So the spending limits go out the window, our own kids are showered with toys that they don't need and won't play with, and we really must spend at least $75 per ADULT or folks feel that we're being "cheap." It doesn't matter that we're four people makin' ends meet on the income from a blue-collar job in a very expensive part of the country; that's irrelevant. No expensive gifts means no love. Ditto for birthdays. DH HATES this about his family. I don't get this mentality. How is this related to Christmas? :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 In our family adults give each other gag gifts or something small ($20 tops) or homemade. Or nothing. Kids get the gifts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynn Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 Depends what they want or what I find for them. I've had some years where I find something for under $20 and other years over $75. I don't have a set limit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We often spend $150 per person, but not always. We don't spend equal amounts on the children - it's just what seems like the right thing for that child that year. I try to go with the, "something you want, something you need, something to wear, something to read" for the children. So, for example, last year we had a pretty indulgent year. The two younger boys to their first video thing- a DS. That was $120 per child, so that was kind of a lot for a "want." Then they got bathrobes (to wear), a book each, and I actually don't remember what the "need" was, but I would say we spent about $200 on the younger children. My older son's (20yo) "need" was a safety kit for his car (I think DH got it from Cost-co) - which I think was his most expensive present and was around $75. I knit him something to wear (which he pretended to love), something to read, and I don't remember his want - maybe a game for his Wii? Then again, I do stockings for the boys too, so it's actually even a bit more than that. But I tend to put a lot of "needs" in the stockings, and candy and just little things that don't cost a whole lot. We don't have a lot of extended family we give to, though. I only have one nephew, no nieces. I don't exchange gifts with one sister and her husband. The other likes to exchange gifts, but we keep it modest. So I give to my parents and my MIL, and then that's it. Not bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faith Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I was under the impression you meant "immediate" family so that would be my husband and kids only. We spend around $100 to $150 on the kids each for Christmas. No one buys for the adults as in my sister, brothers, but we do buy a small gift for my parents. (Dh's parents are both deceased.) We buy my nephews a little something around $20 each or a game or movie. That's all we can do. It's just too expensive for us to do more. Let me add also that none of our relatives live in the same state so that makes it easier to not do for Christmas. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy in Ky Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We average about 3 dollars a person for most of the extended family (around 14 people). We spend a little more on parents (average of $10 probably, per parent. My mom died, so this is 3 parents that we buy for.) This year we are eliminating our sibling/spouse name draw, upon which we spent about $10 per name, 2 names. But I've decided we can't spend that money this year. For our dc (2 of them) we spend probably around $150 each, or so. We spend next to nothing on each other. So far this year, I've purchased or made (and wrapped) about 13 gifts so far. I bought several right after Christmas, and picked up some more a couple weeks ago--this year, it is probably about $2 per person. I've made three scrap fabric wreaths (an 8 inch straw wreath costs about $1.79 a piece). I just wrapped and/or bagged 3 gifts yesterday. Besides dh and 2 dc, I've only got 2 more gifts to purchase this year--my dad and my fil :). It's a great feeling :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We spend over $150 each on our children and each other, but about $50 on each gift for extended family. We don't exchange with other children, and we try to encourage drawing names with dh's family. In my family we only buy within direct family lines and only within two generations. So, a person may only buy for their own child and their own parent. If they don't have kids yet, they can buy for a grandparent but not nieces or nephews (not direct line). We had to put these rules into effect because my mom is one of seven kids, I am the baby of nine and we each have 2-3 kids and those kids are now having 2-3 kids. There are toooooooo many people to buy for~32 kids from my mom&dad down! The other reason we put this into effect is that different parts of the family are closer so they like to exchange gifts, and there are parts of the family that are very low income so everyone wants to buy for them. By the time you did this, there were only a few people left so you may as well buy for everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wagnfun Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 This concerns budgeting for Christmas and a reasonable amount for Secret Santa among family members. I am struggling with a situation that has recently presented itself. Dh's father is out of a job--again. In an effort to reduce Christmas spending this year, the youngest sibling (who still lives at home) has proposed that to take the financial load off the parents, we should do a gift swap with the adult children of the family. The amount is $150 per adult! . So I'm curious what others' per person dollar amount for Christmas would work out to be. I'm going to go through our pictures from last Christmas and see if I can ballpark how much we actually spent (knowing that most of our stuff was bought on clearance or at thrift stores, so that skews the numbers downward somewhat). I can't figure out why I am cringing about this and need some perspective. I feel like our kids already have way too much stuff (and the kids, of which there are 8 total, are not being given the opportunity to Secret Santa their cousins) and I can't think of much that I would want (except household items that exceed $150) or need. We buy for mom and dad. My sister, brother & I do a gift basket for each other at $50 per basket. On my husbands side, we exchange small gifts, usually $25ish per person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracey in TX Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 On the years our extended family gathers for Christmas we do white elephant gifts for the adults. It's SO MUCH FUN :) It is a recycled gift (anything currently owned), gift wrapped. Adults sit in circle and take turns opening a gift or swapping for a better, previously opened one. Any item moves only three times and is with new owner. We have so many laughs, barters, etc. We buy real, new presents for all the children, but relish the fun of a recycled gift. Some years we swap books, coffee cups as well. It's about the fun of opening presents, not the expense of the gift. Maybe you could suggest this in lieu of funding for an unnecessary high dollar gift. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beansprouts Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 On the years our extended family gathers for Christmas we do white elephant gifts for the adults. It's SO MUCH FUN :)It is a recycled gift (anything currently owned), gift wrapped. Adults sit in circle and take turns opening a gift or swapping for a better, previously opened one. Any item moves only three times and is with new owner. We have so many laughs, barters, etc. We buy real, new presents for all the children, but relish the fun of a recycled gift. Some years we swap books, coffee cups as well. It's about the fun of opening presents, not the expense of the gift. Maybe you could suggest this in lieu of funding for an unnecessary high dollar gift. Good luck. That's a lot like our "Yankee Swap". We usually come up with some pretty funny and creative gifts. The year after 2 yo ds was born, I gave away the extra pg test (I had bought a 2-pack and only needed one) It was a riot! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katalaska Posted August 20, 2008 Author Share Posted August 20, 2008 You all have really helped me with your comments. The concensus seems to be that $150 each for the adult children involved in the gift-swap is too much! In my mind, the youngest has basically guaranteed, with this proposal, that her father's unemployment is NOT going to affect HER Christmas. Additionally, she has also put other terms on the arrangement. These are, if you find something on sale, it doesn't matter--what matters is the dollar amount you spend...so if you get it cheap you still have to spend up to within $1 of the $150 "limit." If you live out of state from the person you are to be Secret Santa to, shipping the item is NOT included in your $150 expenses. Those who will be with the family (at the parents' house) this year will also be expected to participate in the White Elephant/Yankee Swap ($25) and the gag gift ($1). The parents are still expected to fill everyone's stockings (which they never do cheaply--that's easily another $20 per person). I just don't see how this can be considered "scaling back," "cutting expenses," and "making sure we only get stuff we want or need and not a bunch of junk and clutter!" I always send the Alaska Moose calendar (about $5) to my in-laws for Christmas. Anything after that is a "I found this and it totally reminded me of you and I knew you'd love it" type of gift. There is no obligation. Same with all of my brothers- and sisters-in-law (there are 10 of them on dh's side)--I only buy something I know they will totally appreciate/need/want but it's not a case of "Well, I bought something for Brother-in-Law #1, so now I must buy for Brother-in-Law #2." There's never an expectation. Plus, we never get gifts from the siblings-in-law (although last year we did and it was a framed picture of their kids which, frankly, would have been a more appropriate gift for them to have given the grandparents!). I'm still trying to figure out what we will do. This year, the $150 is not a financial burden for us. We COULD do it. But should we? That is the question. Dh's father is unemployed and the "assigned" amount seems overboard. If anyone wants to, I would appreciate some help wording a response to the entire family that we will not be participating. I really HATE this idea and can't stand that we are being strongly pressured to join the group. Everyone also knows that we "can afford it" (we are probably the most financially stable family of the entire lot) so we will be labeled "cheap" and other less-nice things. Here are my points: 1. I think the amount is too much. If it was $50 I think we would "play" just for the fun of it but $150 is a HUGE amount of money. 2. I think the terms (i.e. if you find it on sale you still have to spend the entire $150, you have to get within $1 of the $150, you have to pay for shipping, etc.) stink. 3. I can't think of $150 worth of stuff that I would want (everyone keeps saying how they can easily come up with $150 worth of stuff--which to me just means they are all asking for clutter-y stuff). 4. Anything I actually want either a) wouldn't be for Christmas because it's something we'd buy anyway--such as tire chains or table pads or b) would cost more than the "allotted" amount--such as tire chains or table pads or c) both. 5. Even if I could come up with $150 worth of stuff that I "wanted" I'd want dh to buy it for me--not THEM. I really feel like if I want something badly enough then it needs to come from someone closer and I wouldn't want to give all that buying "power" to someone else. 6. I'd rather spend $150 on the kids (i.e. get oldest dd an iPod Nano or something). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kim in Appalachia Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 We spend under $50 per parent, but much less for siblings. We have 5 kids, and I would say we spend less than $200 each. We do sometimes splurge for each other. Last year we didn't because we had to buy a van. (that was our splurge, but it was needed). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynn Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 For extended family. My parents and fil between $50 -$100. Mostly gift cards to best buy, which my dad loves, restraunt gift cards, my mom is fun to buy for because she never lets herself get anything nice, my fil likes gourmet ssg and cheese from a company in Wisconsin. Siblings about $25 family giftlast year it was breakfast items pancake mix, smoked/gourmet bacon and ham from a company in Wisonsin I can't think the name of it.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer3141 Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I spend quite a bit more on the kids which I why I start shopping now. DH and I usually just go and get ourselves something together. Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StaceyinLA Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 $150+ each (they're teens - they're toys are more expensive). I buy fairly inexpensive things for some of my nieces and nephews, occasionally buy for one of my sisters, and we usually pitch in and buy a large item for my Mom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyinTN Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 For our three children we usually spend around $300 each. DH sister/family we send a gift card to a favorite eatery for $100...going out to dinner isn't in their budget so it's our treat. Grandparents gifts $100 each. DH and I usually get something we both want together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassenach Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 To me, immediate family is my kids and husband, so I voted $75-$100. For our parents we spend about $25 each, for brothers and sisters we spend $0-20. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 and didn't know there was a post with it clarifying that this wasn't really want I think of as my immediate family (my husband and kids) but rather my siblings and parents. Okay, that's completely different! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newbie Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 Like others, immediate family is dd's and dh. But extended, there are kids popping up, every yr., so we have cut adults and added that money to niece and nephews. Majority does not like*my* new rule. So I have dropped out of secret santa and I just send gifts for my niece and nephews. I cant afford to buy for everyone and some people dont stick to the money cap and go over. Its out of control. Jet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bee Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 So we spend more on the children than we probably should and they get more from us than they need.We do buy gifts for my brother because he is the one family member we do stay in regular contact with.We usually spend less than $50 on him but we've spent more if we find a gift that we think he might especially enjoy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I answered based on immediate family meaning who live in my house. We do not swap gifts with dh's and my siblings. We do give our parents gifts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alice Posted August 20, 2008 Share Posted August 20, 2008 I didn't answer the poll because it was hard to know who was immediate family. I spend a different amount on my kids than on my husband than on my SIL or my Mom. But in response to your situation...for other adults in the family we typically spend about $50. Which I think is on the high end. I hope to spend less this year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Posted August 21, 2008 Share Posted August 21, 2008 Our "budget" says no more than $100 / person. I'm easily able to stay under that amount. DH on the other hand has a "need" to go overboard (which drives me insane). What really drives me nuts is the fact that the kids are generally more than happy with the bit that I buy them (from he and I). This winds up being one of the major stressors of the season. We give to my family (of 3) and we give to his parents. His family does not give outside of immediate family (and his parents don't give -- to us, I know they do to some of the other kids. . .). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.