Vent post: No I will not homeschool your kid for FREE ETA Update in post #1

[Ameena]

Just need to vent and get this off my chest. Kind criticism okay, but understand it's a VENT. Please don't quote as I'll probably remove later when I've calmed down

 

I agreed to homeschool a friends 4yo for next year for pre-k way back in December. Intital agreement was that I would hs the girl in trade for the dad mowing my lawn, doing minor house repairs, etc. Said little girl was a little behind but I felt that with work she could catch up. I did ask the family to get her evaluated to make sure we were not dealing with anything unexpected. At the time I made the agreement my mom was still alive and we were okay for income. I also needed to be home 24/7 or very close to that to keep an eye on Mom, so staying home to homeschool another little one wasn't an issue.

 

Fast-forward to now: Parents are wanting me to work with said girl 4 hours a day 5 days a week so a total of 20 hours a week. Plus providing field trips and snacks. Evaluation came back, she has severe add, auditory processing issues, and mentally is about 2-3 years old per the eval {She will turn 5 in November}. WAY more than I signed up for, and requiring a revamp of the textbook choices. Okay I can deal with that, not a huge problem. I still think a lot of her issues are a result of a home environment that isn't that great.

 

The mom brought up some work the dad did in a fb conversation tonight, and that I owed them $60 for it {The dad had said don't worry about it when I asked how much}, and had I known he was going to charge $30 a HOUR I would have done the repairs myself as it wasn't anything hard - replacing a toilet valve {I paid for the part}, installing two deadbolts he got free from his work & caulking a few windows. NOT $60 worth of work at all IMO. I casually mentioned that we could consider it a downpayment for schooling the little girl, since I normally would charge about $300 a month for doing that. I added that since they were friends I would agree to do it for $200 a month, and half of that could be in trade. When they objected, I pointed out that I normally charge $10/hr for tutoring, and that is with kids that are merely behind NOT developmentally delayed.

 

They are now claiming I agreed to do it for free. Well yeah if you don't count the trade but that was nearly 6 months ago, we've had major life changes and a huge loss of income due to a death in the family, and the evaluation showed WAY more problems with this little girl than either of us expected. It's going to take a LOT of work with her and lots of one on one rather than putting her in with my dd.

 

ARGH! I feel like marching over there and telling them that the likely reason the little girl is so delayed is because the mom doesn't do ANYTHING with her kids. During the day if the dad isn't home this little girl is shut in her room all day or nearly all day with no TV or stimulation other than her few toys while the mom plays around on the PC. They preach to me about letting my dd have diet soda & sweets, but they eat out nearly every night and often get the kids the kids chocolate chip pancake from IHOP for dinner and think that is "nutritious". Said girl's older brother should have been red-shirted and has major behavior issues.

 

I'm not out of line right? $200 is pretty cheap for hsing a special needs kiddo right? Especially when taking half in trade?

 

The dad really ticked me off tonight on fb - he made a comment about how slavery was against the law {in reference to my asking for part of the payment in trade} but refused to consider it slavery when I said it worked both ways and I don't work for free either to teach his daughter. But of course that was different according to him because I "offered" to do it.

 

 

I know....walk away right?

 

Oh and I just got a text message from them saying they aren't "mad" at me for this. What The....?

 

ETA an update:

 

Late last night the mom sent me another message on FB saying that the dad agreed with me that yes things had changed and understood that I couldn't work for free on account of finances, etc. They are not sure they can afford $100 a month and asked if I would do payments like $25 a week and be flexible on when I got them. Venting again - if they quit eating out so much they'd have money for it. The dad makes good money when he wants to be, and is in the guards to boot so he gets drill pay all the time. 1 drill pay from when he goes out to Cali would pay for the entire year at the $100 a month, so don't give me this you don't have money shizz. She "didn't know what to say except that she'll talk it over with her hubby". She wants us all to sit down and discuss it. Umm no I want anything doing in writing which is why I've been using FB to hash this out. That way it can't turn into a he said she said thing - we have both sides of the convo in writing.

 

90% sure I'm just going to tell them forget about it. OTOH, this is my fix-it guy I call when I'm in a bind & don't have funds to pay right away {I always pay ASAP though}. I don't want to burn my bridges.

 

10% of me feels sorry for the little girl - she is sweet as can be but dealing with a lot of issues from being in that family. I think given a softer enviroment and a little nurturing, most of her issues would disappear. I'm tempted to say okay if you want to charge your going rate of $30/hr for work you do for me, then I'm going to charge going rate of $zyxa a month for private pre-k /daycare setting. And no working out a partial trade.

[Ameena]

edited as somehow I hit quote instead of edit :(

[JBJones]

I would run screaming from that situation.......immediately.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Lordy. Cut him a check for $60 and call the whole thing off. :( Tell him that you're not confident the two groups have the best possible working communication skills to last an entire year, and also that given the results of the eval. you no longer feel qualified to give the child the special education she deserves.

[misty.warden]

I would run screaming from that situation.......immediately.

 

 

I wish I could like this about 1000 more times. I'm sorry, OP.

[Mrs Mungo]

There is no way I would work with this family. I would pay them the $60 and consider my relationship with them over.

[SorrelZG]

edited as somehow I hit quote instead of edit :(

 

 

Oh I've done that too. It's annoying. lol

 

As to your situation, I am so sorry you in it at all. I would do whatever necessary to put an end to all business and trades. It's not what it was in the beginning for either of you. This isn't a friendship if there isn't understanding and graceful acceptance of that reality. :(

[Catwoman]

I agree with everyone else. This is a BAD situation.

 

Don't walk away. RUN!!!

[Ameena]

Lordy. Cut him a check for $60 and call the whole thing off. :(

 

 

Oh I wish I could...but right now I don't have the $60 to pay him. Had he said upfront he was going to charge his $30/hr rate I would have done most if not all of the work myself. There was only 3 things he did that I couldn't do, and they took maybe 30 minutes.

[*Lulu*]

Go imediately to the nearest brick wall and smack your head into it 3 or 4 times. Now, you can either tell them the deal is off and let the temporary headache be your biggest issue, or continue down this path and spend all year smacking your head against their wall of crazy. (And I suspect you'll feel the need to revisit that brick wall a time or two.)

 

For heaven's sake woman, are you waiting for a killer rabbit? Run away! Run away!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited for punctution, capitilization, and some other mechanics issue. Thank goodness this wasn't a standardized test!

[StephanieZ]

Pay him the $60 as soon as you can, and never, ever, ever, in a million years, enter into ANY financial or other arrangement with these crazy people. Do NOT NOT NOT tutor their kid. Danger, danger, danger.

 

Let them know that you are no longer able to offer them child care/ tutoring/ whatever next year, so they need to make other arrangements.

 

Also let them know that you got the $60 bill, and that you intend to pay it within 2 weeks (or whatever). Then scrounge up the $$ and be done with it. Consider yourself to have gotten a very cheap lesson and avoided what could have been a total catastrophe.

[StephanieZ]

Once you've paid them what you owe, unfriend these people and don't take their calls.

[Snow]

:ohmy: Yep, what everyone else said.

[Mrs Mungo]

Pay him the $60 as soon as you can, and never, ever, ever, in a million years, enter into ANY financial or other arrangement with these crazy people. Do NOT NOT NOT tutor their kid. Danger, danger, danger.

 

Let them know that you are no longer able to offer them child care/ tutoring/ whatever next year, so they need to make other arrangements.

 

Also let them know that you got the $60 bill, and that you intend to pay it within 2 weeks (or whatever). Then scrounge up the $$ and be done with it. Consider yourself to have gotten a very cheap lesson and avoided what could have been a total catastrophe.

 

Agreed. You should have directly negotiated payment up front. You did not. Now you are stuck with a bill. Lesson learned, pay it and move on. Be thankful your dealings with this family did not end in a worse situation.

 

[Catwoman]

Oh I wish I could...but right now I don't have the $60 to pay him. Had he said upfront he was going to charge his $30/hr rate I would have done most if not all of the work myself. There was only 3 things he did that I couldn't do, and they took maybe 30 minutes.

 

Stop making excuses and tell the guy and his wife that you're done with them.

 

Seriously.

 

I know you will be losing money by not homeschooling their child, but it's not enough money to make it worth dealing with them. Not even close!!!

 

And if they want their $60, tell them to send you a bill and you'll pay them when you get around to it.

 

Why would you even consider continuing to deal with these people? :confused:

 

I don't even know them, and I can already tell that they're toxic.

 

 

PS. WHY, WHY, WHY would you ever agree to homeschool anyone's child for only $200 a month??? That price is ridiculously low, and you are seriously undervaluing your time and abilities! That family couldn't find a day care center that would only charge $200 a month!!!

 

I'm sorry to yell at you, but it's really bugging me that you're not valuing yourself highly enough. YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN THAT!!!

[Catwoman]

Once you've paid them what you owe, unfriend these people and don't take their calls.

 

:iagree:

 

This, times 100.

 

Ditch them and don't look back.

[LucyStoner]

$200 a month is absurdly cheap for homeschooling a child. They were looking to take serious advantage.

 

Axe these people from your life. Pay them when you can, but I wouldn't be in a huge hurry.

[joannqn]

I agree with everyone else. Run away.

[Seasider]

Curious - why do they want this child to be home schooled?

 

Seriously, the guy charges you $30/hr but expects you to work for free? Or at the rate you propose ($200/mo for 20 hours per week), $2.50 per hour?

 

My mom was a crafts woman in demand for her design and sewing skill. She had many clients over the years that brought her much repeat business. But a few of them were very demanding and difficult to please. Her solution was to increase her rates. She often had to price a job very high before the pesky ones would seek service elsewhere, but in the end she was rid of them. I suggest you send your friends the payment of $60 they're whining about along with a letter explaining that in light of the child's evaluation results, it would be necessary for you to charge a minimum of $30 hour to work with her. Pretty sure you'll be done with them after that. If by some freak chance they agree to it, at least your income problems will be alleviated.

[Ameena]

Curious - why do they want this child to be home schooled?

 

The initial agreement was that I would hs her for pre-k and try to get her caught up for her to go into kinder in ps. She was not potty trained {but mostly is now} and the ps pre-k program will not take children who are not fully potty trained no matter what their age is.

 

Seriously, the guy charges you $30/hr but expects you to work for free? Or at the rate you propose ($200/mo for 20 hours per week), $2.50 per hour?

 

That's exactly what I said.

 

My mom was a crafts woman in demand for her design and sewing skill. She had many clients over the years that brought her much repeat business. But a few of them were very demanding and difficult to please. Her solution was to increase her rates. She often had to price a job very high before the pesky ones would seek service elsewhere, but in the end she was rid of them. I suggest you send your friends the payment of $60 they're whining about along with a letter explaining that in light of the child's evaluation results, it would be necessary for you to charge a minimum of $30 hour to work with her. Pretty sure you'll be done with them after that. If by some freak chance they agree to it, at least your income problems will be alleviated.

 

 

Thanks for the idea - I may try that. They are always calling me for a last minute baby sitter for their two kids too - last time they wanted to pay $20 for 2 kids for 5 hours.

[Dandelion]

Agreeing with everyone else. Be thankful that you're getting off with just a $60 bill. That's nothing compared to the mental, emotional, and possibly even financial strain working with these people would have brought you. :grouphug:

[Lanny]

OP I agree with everyone else who has replied before me in this thread. Pay them the $60, ASAP. Unfriend them, on FB and IRL.

 

Tell them that your situation has changed, considerably, and that you cannot HS their child or babysit for them in the future. Tell them that you wish their family much good luck in the future.

 

If you can refer them to sources, where they can get professional help for the child with developmental issues, point them in the proper direction.

[Blueridge]

Lordy. Cut him a check for $60 and call the whole thing off. :( Tell him that you're not confident the two groups have the best possible working communication skills to last an entire year, and also that given the results of the eval. you no longer feel qualified to give the child the special education she deserves.

 

YES! THIS!

[justasque]

What everyone else said.

 

Plus, Facebook is great for posting pics of kids for Grandma and the Aunties to see, but not great for business negotiations.

Those should be done more thoughtfully and formally.

[KungFuPanda]

I say DON'T cut him the $60 check. Pay him for parts, and give him an hourly wage similiar to what they give you. You should owe about $5 after parts. It sounds like they've gotten enough near-free babysitting from you to more than make it worth his time.

[FaithManor]

Send them a bill for the supplies you used this year to homeschool her - books, paper, manipulatives, etc. and deduct the $60.00 from that. If they would still owe you anything, put paid in full on their bill and put in bold letters, "Do not contact me again." Legally, he owed you an estimate for the repairs on your house before you started. It's a he said/she said, but if it went to small claims court here, you would likely win. I don't know about your state, but my local court recently took a very dim view of a family who did not want to pay their tutoring bill.

 

Word of warning to all of us. As a general rule, our culture really does not teach people to respect others. Everyone is out for self and unfortunately, a good many people believe that others were placed on planet earth for the express purpose of making life easy for them. I hate to say it, they do not respect that which they can get for free or low price. They respect that which they have to pay top dollar for so if you ever think, "I am willing to homeschool someone else's child" then please charge an arm and a leg for doing so no matter how dire the circumstances of the family. Otherwise, you will be a door mat.

 

Frankly, I get $15.00 an hour for tutoring reading and mathematics at the elementary age, and $25.00 an hour for tutoring high school subjects such as chemistry and algebra. Substitute teacher pay is roughly $75.00 per day here. That $75.00 whould be the absolute bare minimum because it's a paltry wage for the responsibility. I'd be willing to do it for 75.00 for pre-k/k, but it would be $100.00 per day for 1-6th grade, and $175.00 per day for 7th - 12th (six courses per day plus lunch) and the registration fee for 1-6th would be $300.00 per annum for curriculum, and $600.00 for 7th-12th. Based on 180 days of school per year - $1125.00 per month for the pre-k/k paid on a 12 month payment plan, $1500.00 for grades 1-6, and $2625.00 per month for secondary ed grades. This is comparable to the good, private prep schools in Detroit. While I may not provide band and sports, the child gets one to one instruction and that's not something they'll get at the prep school.

 

Generally speaking, families that are unwilling or unable to afford this, need to avail themselves of the PS or charter schools in their communities. In many states, it would be illegal to homeschool a child you don't have custody of anyway so there is that issue to consider as well.

 

OP, I'm really sorry. You intended on doing something nice for this family...an assistance in a time of apparent need. They took advantage of you...typical, but still very hurtful. If you would ever even consider doing something like this again, have a business contract already made up on your computer with your prices and terms firmly stated. Make the family sign the contract and do it in front of a witness...pick someone you trust to be a third party signature that they witnessed the family agreeing to the terms. This makes it much easier to hold the family accountable and to extricate yourself from a bad situation...says the former very busy music therapist and piano teacher who dealt with a number of families that made an art form out of trying to "stick it to the teacher".

 

Faith

[bettyandbob]

Devastate your grocery budget for the next month to pay the $60 and RUN FAR AWAY.

 

If you try to proceed, taking this girl on will cost you. If you think they will pay a dime of the piddly amount you requested, you are wrong. They will argue and make excuses. Maybe the dad will come by and do some job in your yard you did not ask him to do to continue some facade of a deal in their own eyes, but they will complain ruthlessly about their dd's progress and will never ever financially compensate you.

[Down_the_Rabbit_Hole]

I agree with the run away fast advice. And want to add, if in the future you are considering schooling another child not your own, get the details in writing and signed. (i learned the hard way this lesson)

[poppy]

That poor little girl.

Reply "If you think I offered to work 20 hours a week for FREE, and you want me to pay you $30 an hour for basic housework, we are at an impasse. I rescind any previous offers. Good luck to your child and family."

Then peace out.

[Slipper]

I agree with everyone else, but wanted to add something more. I tend to think with my heart rather than my mind. If I see a family that is struggling or needs help, I want to help. I commit before thinking it through. You referenced (lightly) that the child's struggles are possibly due to home environment and I know you want to help.

 

I've discovered the best thing for me to do is to always write down why I should or shouldn't do something and then save it in a computer document. I re-read those whenever I am tempted to volunteer. I think you should make one up for this family regarding homeschooling AND baby-sitting. Set a fair price in your notes. In the future, when they decide to ask for another favor, re-read your notes and have limits, prices or just a reminder that this should be a big, fat, NO.

 

Regarding your current situation, tell them (or send a note) nicely that you are sorry for the misunderstanding. You thought this would be an even exchange for services. Tell them that you cannot afford to pay for his work and that you feel it is best to end your arrangement so that the misunderstanding doesn't continue. Emphasize that you are BOTH out of reimbursement for services as your tutoring services typically run at $x amount of dollars.

 

 

[unsinkable]

Send them a bill for the supplies you used this year to homeschool her - books, paper, manipulatives, etc. and deduct the $60.00 from that. If they would still owe you anything, put paid in full on their bill and put in bold letters, "Do not contact me again." Legally, he owed you an estimate for the repairs on your house before you started. It's a he said/she said, but if it went to small claims court here, you would likely win. I don't know about your state, but my local court recently took a very dim view of a family who did not want to pay their tutoring

 

Frankly, I get $15.00 an hour for tutoring reading and mathematics at the elementary age, and $25.00 an hour for tutoring high school subjects such as chemistry and algebra. Substitute teacher pay is roughly $75.00 per day here. That $75.00 whould be the absolute bare minimum because it's a paltry wage for the responsibility. I'd be willing to do it for 75.00 for pre-k/k, but it would be $100.00 per day for 1-6th grade, and $175.00 per day for 7th - 12th (six courses per day plus lunch) and the registration fee for 1-6th would be $300.00 per annum for curriculum, and $600.00 for 7th-12th. Based on 180 days of school per year - $1125.00 per month for the pre-k/k paid on a 12 month payment plan, $1500.00 for grades 1-6, and $2625.00 per month for secondary ed grades. This is comparable to the good, private prep schools in Detroit. While I may not provide band and sports, the child gets one to one instruction and that's not something they'll get at the prep school.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ameena hasn't started homeschooling this girl yet so I don't think your first paragraph is applicable.

 

As for your proposed fee schedule...let us know when someone takes you up on that!

[FaithManor]

Ameena hasn't started homeschooling this girl yet so I don't think your first paragraph is applicable.

 

As for your proposed fee schedule...let us know when someone takes you up on that!

 

The OP homeschooled the child last year to try to bring her forward developmentally.

 

And the reason for the proposed fee schedule would be to prevent being taken advantage of so I would not expect anyone to take me up on it. I get asked often, and always by people who want something for nothing, so emailing them a fee schedule like this insures that I don't get second phone calls about it.

Daycare is $50.00 per day around here...the OP should at least charge that.

 

As for the tutoring, I currently have three algebra 1 students twice per week at $25.00 per hour whose parents gladly write me a check each week and two chemistry students who do the same. All five students were failing or close to failing their courses after their first quarter grades. All of them have B's or better now. So, I think my fees are very reasonable for the service provided. They would have paid the same amount for tutoring from the public school teachers in our area. However, very, very few ps. teachers tutor on their private time, so it can be difficult, especially at the high school level, to find someone. I have more people who have asked, but I can't handle anymore students without detracting from my own kids educations.

 

Faith

[Impish]

Another thought too...If you did do this (insanity) chances are, they'd find a way to blame you for any issues the child has, that caused a problem when she did move to ps.

 

Frankly, I think you'd end up not getting paid at all, and loads of trouble. Run, run, run!

[poppy]

They eat out nearly every night but can't afford education for their daughter?

Aye aye aye.

 

With her special needs, the child will qualify for services next year in school, correct? She'll be OK.

 

If you do decide to move forward, I agree, no partial trade for services, and make HIM commit to a fee schedule in advance. $30 an hour, no flipping way.

 

ETA: Actually, skip that. Walk away. Them expecting you to be ok with $100/month for 20 hour per week education is so absurd and insulting. Tell them good luck and goodbye.

[unsinkable]

Just need to vent and get this off my chest. Kind criticism okay, but understand it's a VENT. Please don't quote as I'll probably remove later when I've calmed down

 

I agreed to homeschool a friends 4yo for next year for pre-k way back in December. Intital agreement was that I would hs the girl in trade for the dad mowing my lawn, doing minor house repairs, etc. Said little girl was a little behind but I felt that with work she could catch up. I did ask the family to get her evaluated to make sure we were not dealing with anything unexpected. At the time I made the agreement my mom was still alive and we were okay for income. I also needed to be home 24/7 or very close to that to keep an eye on Mom, so staying home to homeschool another little one wasn't an issue.

 

 

The OP homeschooled the child last year to try to bring her forward developmentally.

 

And the reason for the proposed fee schedule would be to prevent being taken advantage of so I would not expect anyone to take me up on it. I get asked often, and always by people who want something for nothing, so emailing them a fee schedule like this insures that I don't get second phone calls about it.

Daycare is $50.00 per day around here...the OP should at least charge that.

 

As for the tutoring, I currently have three algebra 1 students twice per week at $25.00 per hour whose parents gladly write me a check each week and two chemistry students who do the same. All five students were failing or close to failing their courses after their first quarter grades. All of them have B's or better now. So, I think my fees are very reasonable for the service provided. They would have paid the same amount for tutoring from the public school teachers in our area. However, very, very few ps. teachers tutor on their private time, so it can be difficult, especially at the high school level, to find someone. I have more people who have asked, but I can't handle anymore students without detracting from my own kids educations.

 

Faith

 

I dont' know...what I bolded makes it sound like it hasn't happend yet. But I could be wrong.

 

That is awesome about the tutoring. You should save these posts for threads when people ask about tutoring and just copy and paste them. It would be so helpful to those who are looking to start tutoring.

[FaithManor]

I dont' know...what I bolded makes it sound like it hasn't happend yet. But I could be wrong.

 

That is awesome about the tutoring. You should save these posts for thread when people ask about tutoring and just copy and paste them. It would be so helpful to those who are looking to start tutoring.

 

 

You know what...in re-reading the Op, I can't quite tell either. It sounded like maybe she'd worked with her enough to know that she was having delays, but maybe not...I'm not certain even though my initial reading made me think she had worked with the little girl. Thanks for pointing that out.

 

I have no idea how to save threads, or do tags, or what not. I'm really, really lucky to have an avatar! I may be great at math and science, but I'm hopelessly incompetant with a computer! :D If my avatar and signature had not been preserved when WTM went to the new board/update, I'd probably still be without it. My kids think it's a real hoot that I still can't link a picture or an attachment. Technologically - I think I'm functionally illiterate. Sniff, sniff

 

Faith

[Trish]

 

 

Oh I wish I could...but right now I don't have the $60 to pay him. Had he said upfront he was going to charge his $30/hr rate I would have done most if not all of the work myself. There was only 3 things he did that I couldn't do, and they took maybe 30 minutes.

 

 

Haven't you already done at least $60 of teaching and/or babysitting for them? Call it even.

[Jean in Newcastle]

If you charge people a fair amount and don't allow yourself to be taken advantage of, you should be able to better afford to pay someone else for fixing things up. But you can't really expect to use the husband for inexpensive fix-its while trying not to be taken advantage of them in this situation. It's not going to work because someone is going to feel taken advantage of and it makes it impossible to set good boundaries.

[SKL]

I would tell them that under the circumstances, you believe it makes more sense for the little girl to go to public school where the government is required to give her the educational supports she needs free of charge. Then pay the $60 as soon as possible. In the future, always get an advance quote from this guy for each and every job he does for you. Treat him at arm's length just like he's treating you. It's probably best that way anyhow. Obligation isn't good for friendships.

[Spryte]

I agree with the others saying that this is not going to turn out well. Personally, I'd scrounge up the $60 and pay them, so that there is no reason for them to complain that the DH did work and you didn't pay. I'd call it contributing to neighborhood peace, in my mind. :) No, I don't think you "owe" them the money, but I'd do it anyway. Or at least ask them for a bill, and tell them that I'll pay X amount asap - whatever schedule you can manage comfortably.

 

Given the evaluation results, the little girl probably has option within the public school system. In our state, most counties have programs for kids with delays, and those would be tailored to her needs - and free. You might just let the parents know that you think their daughter would be better served getting specialized services. If you are worried that she *won't* get those services, then point the parents in the direction of the PS options. I bet the evaluator has already filled them in on any options in your area, so the parents may already know anyway.

 

This is one of those times you might just feel grateful that these people have shown their crazy now, before you are in too deep!

[Parrothead]

If you are going to run a business, run it professionally. You say you don't have the money to pay the handy man, yet you barter and wonder why you are being taken advantage of.

 

Your rate for homeschooling is ___ per hour. The family rate is ____ per hour.

 

Your going rate for babysitting is ___ per hour. The family rate is ____ per hour.

 

There is no friendship discount. You are running a business. Treat it as such. It is fairly simple to creat contracts from on-line templates. These contracts should cover what you will provide, along with what you will not provide. They should include late fees for late payments, late fees for late pick up of the child, and a fee for early drop off. They should include your snack policy, and your lunch policy.

 

You should type up and put into a frame by your entry, a schedule of fees so parents are reminded each time they leave.

[JFSinIL]

Do Not Teach That Girl. Her parents are moochers. She should be evaluated by the local school district and placed in the public school system with an IEP.

I believe from age 3 and up the school have to assess and help the kids (I have had three kids go through developmental preschool and one only get speech services - starting age 3. One of the kids who was a year delayed in language started preschool age 3 - is my Honors Chem. Jr in college on full merit scholarship now!)

The parents will have to be more accountable to the school folk than they would be to you, anyway, when it comes to working with the child at home, etc.

 

If they really do not want to do this - give them a list of appropriate books/materials, even lend/give them some - and let them handle it. Offer, maybe, to give them $60worth of materials if you don't have the cash (I agree, pay them somehow and then bye-bye!)

[zoobie]

They've put this much effort and crazy into a $60 repair bill. What do you think they're going to do when it's about their kid? You know they're nuts and it's going to end badly. You can make much more than $2/hr or whatever it works out to be babysitting, and then you can afford a real handyman.

[Orthodox6]

If you can refer them to sources, where they can get professional help for the child with developmental issues, point them in the proper direction.

 

 

This. (but do not stick around to listen to their excuses)

 

The parents say that they are planning to use the public schools. Some of the child's troubles quickly will be obvious to school staff and intervention should follow.

[Seasider]

They are now emotionally manipulating you.

 

You could dicker terms with these people, in writing, on fb, for days, and still never reach a point where you are fairly compensated. It is time to just say no. These folks are toxic and if you do take on this student, you will get blamed for future problems (as another poster has pointed out).

 

Take your tender heart and find a childcare client or student to tutor whose parents are willing to pay you a fair rate up front for the services your provide.

[Ameena]

They eat out nearly every night but can't afford education for their daughter?

Aye aye aye.

 

With her special needs, the child will qualify for services next year in school, correct? She'll be OK.

 

 

Actually no she won't be eligible for services right now. While yes she has delays, our local district doesn't provide services until a child is either "grossly in need" i.e. very low functioning mentally, has severe medical issues like Celebral Palsy requiring constant monitoring, etc. OR is at least 3 grade levels behind. So pretty much here unless you are severely in need of services you aren't getting them until at least 3rd or 4th grade, by which time most of the kids here are so far behind they never catch up, especially since they do a weird program here designed to "meet children where they are functioning and present all materials at that level" rather than trying to catch them up. They will not evaluate for an IEP without one of those criteria being met prior to the evaluation. I discovered this when looking to put my high functioning ASD daughter in the same district - the school refused to provide services as she wasn't delayed enough in all areas. This family is already going through this with the older brother - he should have an IEP and be evaluated for ADHD & Dislexia, but the school is refusing to do it. Apparently the school district is getting away with this due to "lack of funding for special ed programs". We are in Texas and the state cut school funding WAY back a year or two ago, and many districts are cutting extra programs. I know they have been sued over it, but it's been in court for several years with no resolution.

 

You know what...in re-reading the Op, I can't quite tell either. It sounded like maybe she'd worked with her enough to know that she was having delays, but maybe not...I'm not certain even though my initial reading made me think she had worked with the little girl. Thanks for pointing that out.

 

 

I have not worked with her formally. But they are family friends and I see them often, and did somewhat see where she is at. I had already started to gather materials & form lesson plans though for her.

 

 

 

I have been looking online at private pre-school tuition costs - it seems to range anywhere from $300 a month to $1200 a month. Mostly about $600-$800 a month plus fees, meals, bus, etc. That is for 4 day half day programs, but the same amount of hours per week as my 3 day program. I'm considering laying all that out in an email and saying {in a much nicer method} that if you want to charge me full retail rate of $30/hr for services provided to me {repairs, lawn mowing, etc} then I will have to charge you full retail rate for schooling your daughter which will be $600 a month plus fees, with no trading allowed. If they take me up on it then hey it's income for me, if not then I'm rid of the problem. if they do take me up on it, going the contract route with everything in writing and having it signed in front of a notary :)

[Alessandra]

If those parents had spent 5 minutes thinking about their little girl, they might have noticed the delays. They could have called Early Intervention for a free evaluation. The girl could have qualified for free Early Intervention up to age three and free preschool beginning on her third birthday . And handyman dad would not have had to caulk any windows for that.

 

If they want to skip the ps system, they could find a special needs private school. In my area, that would be $35,000 - $60,000 per year (including transportation). I wonder how many hours it would take dad to work that off at $30/hour?

 

Sorry for my bitter, nasty tone. But it makes me very angry when parents who seems to have basic resources do not get help for kids who need it.

[regentrude]

$100 a month??? That is ridiculous. This is NOT worth your time and trouble. RUN.

 

If you ever want to tutor or homeschool a child, set an hourly rate that is appropriate for the level of expertise and the service you provide. For private teaching, your rate can NOT be lower than an hourly babysitting rate- it should be higher. Do not sell yourself short.

And do not even begin to deal with these people.

[sassenach]

Actually no she won't be eligible for services right now. While yes she has delays, our local district doesn't provide services until a child is either "grossly in need" i.e. very low functioning mentally, has severe medical issues like Celebral Palsy requiring constant monitoring, etc. OR is at least 3 grade levels behind. So pretty much here unless you are severely in need of services you aren't getting them until at least 3rd or 4th grade, by which time most of the kids here are so far behind they never catch up, especially since they do a weird program here designed to "meet children where they are functioning and present all materials at that level" rather than trying to catch them up. They will not evaluate for an IEP without one of those criteria being met prior to the evaluation. I discovered this when looking to put my high functioning ASD daughter in the same district - the school refused to provide services as she wasn't delayed enough in all areas. This family is already going through this with the older brother - he should have an IEP and be evaluated for ADHD & Dislexia, but the school is refusing to do it. Apparently the school district is getting away with this due to "lack of funding for special ed programs". We are in Texas and the state cut school funding WAY back a year or two ago, and many districts are cutting extra programs. I know they have been sued over it, but it's been in court for several years with no resolution.

 

 

 

I have not worked with her formally. But they are family friends and I see them often, and did somewhat see where she is at. I had already started to gather materials & form lesson plans though for her.

 

 

 

I have been looking online at private pre-school tuition costs - it seems to range anywhere from $300 a month to $1200 a month. Mostly about $600-$800 a month plus fees, meals, bus, etc. That is for 4 day half day programs, but the same amount of hours per week as my 3 day program. I'm considering laying all that out in an email and saying {in a much nicer method} that if you want to charge me full retail rate of $30/hr for services provided to me {repairs, lawn mowing, etc} then I will have to charge you full retail rate for schooling your daughter which will be $600 a month plus fees, with no trading allowed. If they take me up on it then hey it's income for me, if not then I'm rid of the problem. if they do take me up on it, going the contract route with everything in writing and having it signed in front of a notary :)

 

If you are in the US, your local district is breaking the law. That is not how Part B of IDEA is laid out. They MUST give you an IEP within 60 days, even if their recommendation is that your child doesn't qualify for services. The threshold of 3-4 grades behind is also not legal. If this is truly how they operate, somebody needs to sue their butts.

 

As for your contract idea, IMO it's unwise. They have shown you the type of people they are. If you go into business with them, frankly, you're making your bed. I think you'll regret it. If you do create a contract, you better put some wording in there about it being at will, with the ability to stop services at any time, for any reason. You don't want to put yourself in a situation where you're stuck finishing the school year.

 

ETA: IDEA is a Federal law. It doesn't matter which state you are in, this child should absolutely receive services.

[Tiberia]

They are not just undervaluing you. They are undervaluing their daughter, and that's the disturbing part to me.

 

If my kid had a need like that, I'd cut back whatever was needed to supply the money to meet her needs. If they keep eating out and spending the money and say they can't pay you, it's really an indication that they don't want to spend money on their kiddo. That's sad.