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How far would you go while your child is in a class?


ILiveInFlipFlops
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My oldest (10.5) takes a two-hour art class every week, and I really want to use that time to get some stuff done. This week, that could include running 25 minutes to my parents house and back. DD has a cell phone and is with a trusted teacher and a friend. I knew she feels a little nervous about my going, but really, I'm the ONLY parent who seems to stay in the building. And she's been in this art class, with these kids and this teacher, for 6 months now.

 

WWYD? Would you feel comfortable running to your parents' house and coming back, or even going home (10 minutes away) and coming back? Or would you stay and sit and wait every week?

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I leave my children at their social club (pokemon league) and leave for a few hours. They've been going for long enough that I know many of the other people there; ds12 has a phone; ds10 is responsible and both know the rules. The rules are very simple. Never, ever leave that building. Never. We tell them every time and they understand the consequences of if they do. They will not be able to go again. This is very important to reinforce because there's a wide range of kids there. The teens run to 7-11 or a fast food place all the time. We make sure our kids have treats/snacks so there is no need.

I feel fine leaving them. Actually, dh and I drop them off together and have mini-dates every Saturday. It's glorious.

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For art, yes I would. I'd have a backup plan in case if you're delayed though. Where I live, going 25 minutes away could mean getting stuck in traffic. That would concern me.

 

When mine are in martial arts, I don't go more than 5-10 minutes away because of the chance of injury. That's just me though. For other things I'm fine going further.

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Yeah, I don't see any problems with leaving her. We drop Rebecca at her gym for 3.5 hour practices and I stay in town (we live 40 minutes away) but I'll go 15-25 minutes away. I keep my cell phone and she's about to inherit my super cheap basic one. We trust the gym, and they all know the team girls and their parents. She'll be 10 next month.

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My oldest (10.5) takes a two-hour art class every week, and I really want to use that time to get some stuff done. This week, that could include running 25 minutes to my parents house and back. DD has a cell phone and is with a trusted teacher and a friend. I knew she feels a little nervous about my going, but really, I'm the ONLY parent who seems to stay in the building. And she's been in this art class, with these kids and this teacher, for 6 months now.

 

WWYD? Would you feel comfortable running to your parents' house and coming back, or even going home (10 minutes away) and coming back? Or would you stay and sit and wait every week?

 

I'd feel comfortable dropping off as long as I had adult back up. Should you blow out a tire 25 minutes away, you want to make sure someone other that the art teacher can cover for you.

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At The Little Gym we leave if we want to. I usually stay just because I don't have anything better to do in that time frame, but if I need to leave, I just tell my kids in advance, inform a teacher, and make sure I get back by the end of class.

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I've always sat on the little hard benches or in folding chairs to wait for classes that are around a hour long. If the weather is nice and the location is good, I might als enjoy a walk. I bring a book and enjoy the quiet time. For classes stretching beyond two hours, I'll typcially run an errand if I need to then sit and read. I figured out long ago that I'm different than other parents, and it is okay.

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I don't leave the island. Mostly because of the drawbridges potentially making me miss my pick up times, as my children's activities top out at 1 hr long. But with 2 hours, I could actually get something done off-island and build in enough time to wait out any bridge opening. I would do it. I wouldn't always do it. But sometimes, sure!

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I absolutely would if other parents are using that time. I don't sign up for classes that I need to stay on site for very much anymore, because I NEED that time. I'd just make sure you had someone's number on my cell phone that was staying on site. Like the teacher's.

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it depends on the teacher. Has she signed on to take full responsibility for your child for that period or just to teach art? Does she have backup - if a child had a major emergency and she couldn't get hold of you for some unexpected reason does she just call an ambulance and hand them over? Ds5.75 takes an after school gym glass held in his own school hall. He and a friend play in the playground for a while then go over then I join him after I have picked up ds3.5. It would not occur me to leave a child at a preschool class.

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For an hour class, we drop off the kids and walk around to do groceries shopping and banking. For two to three hours class we will run errands. However our kids classes are in schools or centers where there are staff who we can call in emergencies to stay with our kids until we reach.

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I often leave ds9 at the dojo for his martial arts class. Sometimes even a bit past his class time so he can play with the other kids (only if I have arranged it with another parent who will be there at the end of class to keep an eye on them). We have been at this dojo for 5 years now though, and know the instructors and most of the other parents and kids very well.

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Thanks everyone. I did run my errand yesterday while she was in class, and it went fine. I don't want to go that far on a regular basis, but I'm glad I did yesterday, because I was so tired I would have had a hard time making the drive AFTER class, which was the other option. Normally I sit and talk with my friend, whose daughter is also in the class, but she wasn't there yesterday, so it all worked out well. I think it was good for DD too, to know that she's safe there even if I'm not sitting downstairs waiting. She was OK when I told her I would be leaving, too, so that was good.

 

I appreciate the input!

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I've been leaving Hobbes at his Karate and Cubs/Scouts for at least two years. I walk the dog or go to the supermarket.

 

By the time I was eleven, I was taking two public buses to get to school. And no, the world was not safer then - the 24-hour news cycle had just not started.

 

Laura

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I've been leaving Hobbes at his Karate and Cubs/Scouts for at least two years. I walk the dog or go to the supermarket.

 

By the time I was eleven, I was taking two public buses to get to school. And no, the world was not safer then - the 24-hour news cycle had just not started.

 

Laura

 

 

Just to clarify, my concerns weren't about safety (I was walking home across town to an empty apartment at age 7!). They were more about whether her anxiety was reasonable and about whether 25 minutes each way was realistically too far to go given the chances of an accident, a flat tire, traffic, a power outage in her building, or some other very-small-odds occurrence. I wanted to see if most people thought going, say, more than five minutes away from the building was too much of a chance to take in case parents might need to return quickly. I personally didn't think it was, but I find that I tend to be more on the optimistic side of things like this, so I wanted to get some more perspective. I was recently in a conversation at our co-op where people expressed that they'd feel more comfortable leaving their kids at home alone than in a parked car in broad daylight for five minutes. That conversation made me feel a little like I must be missing some important piece of parenting information!

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Just to clarify, my concerns weren't about safety (I was walking home across town to an empty apartment at age 7!). They were more about whether her anxiety was reasonable and about whether 25 minutes each way was realistically too far to go given the chances of an accident, a flat tire, traffic, a power outage in her building, or some other very-small-odds occurrence. I wanted to see if most people thought going, say, more than five minutes away from the building was too much of a chance to take in case parents might need to return quickly. I personally didn't think it was, but I find that I tend to be more on the optimistic side of things like this, so I wanted to get some more perspective. I was recently in a conversation at our co-op where people expressed that they'd feel more comfortable leaving their kids at home alone than in a parked car in broad daylight for five minutes. That conversation made me feel a little like I must be missing some important piece of parenting information!

 

 

Okay - that makes sense.

 

Laura

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My oldest (10.5) takes a two-hour art class every week, and I really want to use that time to get some stuff done. This week, that could include running 25 minutes to my parents house and back. DD has a cell phone and is with a trusted teacher and a friend. I knew she feels a little nervous about my going, but really, I'm the ONLY parent who seems to stay in the building. And she's been in this art class, with these kids and this teacher, for 6 months now.

 

WWYD? Would you feel comfortable running to your parents' house and coming back, or even going home (10 minutes away) and coming back? Or would you stay and sit and wait every week?

 

 

Well in your situation, *I* would be comfortable with going home 10 minutes away, but I probably wouldn't go 25 minutes away during a 2 hour class. Mainly because around here, a trip that usually takes 25 minutes can all of a sudden take 45 minutes because of traffic or construction.

 

However, if my *child* wasn't comfortable with it, then I would stay. But I'm a softy like that, LOL.

 

Moose is very, very attached, even now at 7 years old. As in, he is not comfortable with the idea of staying with his favorite uncle/aunt/cousins for an hour or two so Daddy and I can go out on a dinner date. And he LOVES going to this uncle's house. So I really don't think there's any way he'd stay at a class without me. Zee, who's almost 10, *might* be comfortable in your scenario after being in the class for six months. Maybe. If he was having a good day. :D

 

Now, I wouldn't fault you for deciding that your dc is old enough at 10.5 that you can leave during her class. I think that's perfectly reasonable, assuming it wouldn't cause her so much anxiety that she cried or something. I just know that I happen to be very accommodating to my kids in regards to not leaving them; some might even say more than I should be. I think we each know our children best, you know?

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With my younger two, I've never been gone from the location of a class for more than 15 or 20 minutes just because my son can be hard to handle. He may be better now but the last time they did a class was almost a year ago.

 

With my oldest, she was dancing 2 or 3 hours on some nights by the time she was 8. I would not stay on her long nights. She had already been at the studio for 3 years by then, knew all the other girls, was comfortable with the teachers and the studio director. At that age I would usually go home, which was about 15 minutes away. We moved when she was 10 and didn't want to change her studio. I still went home on her long nights, even though it was at least 30 minutes away.

 

There were rare occasions where something happened and I didn't make it back in time (maybe 3 or 4 times in 10 years). I would text or call her to let her know, or call the studio before she had a cell phone. If the studio was still open, she'd sit in the waiting room and wait. If it ended up being after closing, one of the teachers would wait with her until I got there.

 

She has had injuries or gotten sick while there. I would go pick her up but if it was a true emergency, her father and my mother, along with at least one parent that I really trusted, were closer. Usually I didn't even hear about injuries until I picked her up and she'd come out and say she hurt..whatever limb or joint.

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