Julie in Austin Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 December 19th Julie: “Nathan, eat breakfast so you can start on your school work.†Nathan: “Can I please finish my book first?†Julie: “How many pages do you have left?†Nathan: “2,500.†December 20th Nathan: “Can we snuggle? Because some day when I’m 18, you’ll wake up and say, ‘I really should have snuggled with Nathan when I had the chance because now those days are gone forever.’†December 22nd Given his initial reaction to the idea, Julie is thrilled when Nathan seems less opposed to the idea of having company visit and stay in his bedroom overnight. He even makes a sign for the door that says “COME IN AND MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE.†Julie gets a little teary-eyed at his kindness. Later on she notices that he is still working on the sign. He has added another sentence: “AS IT MIGHT BE THE LAST THING YOU EVER DO.†December 25th Nathan: “Well, I’m glad that’s over. Now I don’t have to be good again for hundreds of days.†January 9th Nathan is climbing on something he shouldn’t at the church pancake breakfast. An adult asks him to get down. Nathan asks, “By what authority are you asking me to get down?†January 18th: Truman: “Can I get a cinder?†Julie: “A sister?†Truman: “No, a cinder!†Julie: “A what?†Truman: “You know: a cinder! The electronic thing that you read on?†Julie: “You mean a Kindle?†February 1st Truman: “Why is it not appropriate to stick your middle finger up?†February 3rd Truman, who has grown a few inches and is now chest-height to Julie: “Mom, what are those two lumps of fat?†February 6th Truman: “Why does our house never catch on fire?†April 3rd Truman: “My stomach is thirsting for muffins.†April 7th Truman, hesitantly: “Mom, is “whyIoughtta†a bad word?†April 14th Nathan, at a friend’s house, to the mom there, “We have decided that we want to watch The Princess Bride and if you don’t let us, we are going to go union.†April 29th Truman notices all of the food that one of our toddler foster children has thrown on the ground: “Mom, all of this food on the floor really disturbs me. Can you clean it up?†May 1st Derrick asked Truman to turn on the light. Truman walks over to the light switch and says in a robotic, feminized voice, “Please wait three days for service.†June 10th Julie: “Tru, don’t do that; you are going to hurt yourself.†Truman: “No, I’m invincible.†July 15th Simon ponders whether, as a vegetarian, he should be eating angel hair pasta. July 25th Truman makes a passing reference to the chocolate chips in his cereal. Julie: “What? What chocolate chips?†Truman: “I put chocolate chips in my cereal. Like Daddy puts banana in his cereal. It’s the same thing!†August 20th Nathan, in best British accent and looking like an urchin, “Chocolate for the poor, gov’nur?†August 27th Nathan: “Why can’t they make a cologne that smells like gerbils? Eu de Gerbile? It would be a hit!†Nathan: “Mom, be sure to put one of those toothpicks with the American flag on it in your sandwich so Canadians can’t steal your lunch.†August 28th Nathan, clutching at his face where Julie just kissed him: “It burns! It burns!†August 29th Sign found taped up in the bathroom: “Deu to the lack of tolet papr, please use both sides.†September 21st Nathan to Julie: “I need a $200 grant for my missile silo, and in return, when I rule the world, you can be the duchess of Yugoslavia.†October 13th Julie finds Nathan’s written plan to take over the world: “USA: blackmail Russia: bribe with piece of USA and then renege England: cut off their tea and crumpets Greece: threaten to blow up Parthenon Germany: cut off the beer supplies China: cut off all of their jobs Japan: diplomacy Korea: war rest of the world has not been decided†October 29th Truman: “Mommy, you look just like a sumo wrestler with that thing in your hair [=bun] and being this wide [extends his arms to demonstrate large girth].†October 31st Simon: “Mom, it was very nice of you to make these cookies and everything, but I am wondering if there was some kind of ulterior motive, like ‘I am sick of your squabbling all day and so I put elephant tranquilizers in the cookies.’†November 10th Part of Simon’s outline: “The French Revolution was caused by revolting people.†November 20th 20 minutes into today’s 900 mile drive, Truman says, “Doh! I forgot to wear shoes!†December 10th As we (finally) emerge from IKEA, Simon says sotte voce to Nathan: “She’s finally escaped the lotus flowers.†Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alphabetika Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 :lol::lol::lol::lol: The intelligence! The creativity! The quirkiness! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HayesW Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Thank you! The humor is lovely! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: Your kids are FUNNY!!! My favorite was: He even makes a sign for the door that says “COME IN AND MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE.†Julie gets a little teary-eyed at his kindness. Later on she notices that he is still working on the sign. He has added another sentence: “AS IT MIGHT BE THE LAST THING YOU EVER DO.†Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nicole M Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 I look forward to this every year. A few years back, inspired by you, I started my own list. It's far to off-color and political for this board, but it's awfully fun to document this stuff! Thank you for the giggles and the inspiration. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasar31629 Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 :lol: This was a hoot!!! I loved it- thanks for the laughs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 ROFLMAO! Oh, I have tears running down my face. I can't decide if Truman is going to rule the world or write comedy for SNL. How on earth do you keep a straight face?!?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 I look forward to this every year too. It never disappoints!:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassenach Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 I always look forward to these posts! Their were lots of gems in there, but my favorite was the plans for world domination. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i.love.lucy Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 :smilielol5:That was awesome! Your kids are a hoot!!! I love "by what authority"! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crissy Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Oh, Julie! Thank you for posting this again. I think your boys get funnier every year! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardening momma Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Thank you! I look forward to this every year. Love it, love it, love it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crissy Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 A few years back, inspired by you, I started my own list. It's far to off-color and political for this board, but it's awfully fun to document this stuff! Thank you for the giggles and the inspiration. :lol: Your boys are hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 [October 29th Truman: “Mommy, you look just like a sumo wrestler with that thing in your hair [=bun] and being this wide [extends his arms to demonstrate large girth].” :lol::lol::lol::lol:Oh, my gosh...I have tears. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissel Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 I look forward to this every year. I do too! :lol::lol::lol: I need to start keeping a journal of this stuff as well. I always intend to start...and then never do *sigh* Maybe I'll make this a New Year's resolution! Julie, you must be in stitches all day there :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 :smilielol5:That was awesome! Your kids are a hoot!!! I love "by what authority"! :iagree: Truly, thank you. I love reading your yearly list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Can't believe a whole year has gone by already. Love the list! Cinder Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Ok, that was fantastic! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkle Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Oh, man, I'm going to be laughing for days over these. I'm so glad you store these up each year, they are too hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Too funny! I keep an ongoing wordpad document of the funny things my kids say, too. They're always so fun to look back on! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Celia Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Hilarious! "By what authority" had me laughing so hard my kids came running to see what was going on! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nicole M Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 :lol:Your boys are hilarious. Why thank you! Your boys are pretty darned awesome, too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patches Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 So funny! You have smart children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScoutTN Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 hilarious!!! thanks for sharing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bookfiend Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Totally motivated to try this for ourselves this year. What a crack-up, and who wouldn't buy gerbil perfume? I need links to the previous years! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa in Jax Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 I love to read these every year. Thanks for sharing! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan in TN Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 Cutting off the tea and crumpets? He's got some nerve! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindyg Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 Every year I love reading these! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caitilin Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 If there were a Best of the Boards Award, these would definitely win, hands down--love it! :lol::lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sahamamama Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 Can I adopt Nathan? He is a riot. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 This is awesome every year! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baseball mom Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 I love it :lol: I mean to write down what my bunch says but never get around to it. You rock for doing it :thumbup: (and for sharing) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirch Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 :lol: What a riot!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melenie Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 These are so funny. Thanks for posting. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katemary63 Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 What a funny family you have! Hilarious! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eaglei Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 Hilarious! I love reading these each year - thanks for posting them! Thanks, too, for reminding me of something else to be thankful for as I also have kept a list over the years! You *think* you won't forget, but when I re-read them, there is always something that I am surprised to not have remembered! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrixieB Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 (edited) August 27thNathan: “Why can’t they make a cologne that smells like gerbils? Eu de Gerbile? It would be a hit!” I mentioned this one to my family. DD13: "Well, they should! Gerbils smell really good, except when they get too warm. Then they're a little stinky." DH: "There would be a limited market, at least..." DD just brought one of the gerbils downstairs. "Here, smell her back. She smells really good, don't you think?" :lol: Edited December 12, 2010 by TrixieB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cin Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 Elephant Traquilizers, now THAT's a FABULOUS idea. My thanks to your son! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 Truman- he can't be stopped, you can only hope to contain him! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JadeOrchidSong Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 Love them all! My younger boy (almost 6): Mom, when I am out of your nest, I will buy the house for sale closest to your house so that I can come over for lunch. I love it whenever he says that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 I look for this every year! You are such a part of the "culture" of this board. You should write a book.:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Katia Posted December 12, 2010 Share Posted December 12, 2010 I agree that you should write a book. It would be an instant best-seller.....and your kids would find some way to get the royalties split between them, LOL. Thanks for posting these each year. I look forward to it, and you never disappoint!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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