Home school before school age?

[Mrs Mungo]

That's funny! :lol:

 

It reminds me of an aquaintance that told me she and I spent the same amount of time with our kids.

 

When I pointed out that hers were in school all day and mine were home with me she said it all evens out.

 

Huh?!!?

 

:confused: That is nuts.

 

This thread started almost a year ago.

 

Not that it matters. I liked reading it -- I missed it the first time around.

 

D'oh!! I could have at least checked to see if I answered already!

[Dmmetler]

I don't consider it homeschooling before K any more than I considered my DD's Mothers Day Out program "school"-it was simply a place for her to go while I taught my university classes and play with other kids, and what we did at home was just play.

 

Having said that, though, I also didn't do any formal programs, workbooks, or similar activities until she was K age except for HWOT, and that was only because she was trying to write and getting frustrated, and I figured that it was better to do HWOT with a 3 yr old than have HW WITH T by waiting!

[unsinkable]

:confused: That is nuts.

 

 

 

D'oh!! I could have at least checked to see if I answered already!

 

It is confusing until I realized that this woman likes to be "The Est."

 

She's the thinnest.

 

The prettiest.

 

The busiest.

 

The sickest.

 

Etc...

 

Any subject, she has to be the one on top. So, when someone said to me, in front of her, that I (unsinkable) spent more time with my kids than anyone else the speaker knew, this woman (the Est) had to chime in with that she & I spent the same amount of time with our kids.

 

So she was tied with me. Not quite the Est, but tied for it. :lol:

[Momling]

There is something that bugs me. A woman asked me where my boys go to school and I told her we home school. She said, "Oh, I home school my kids as well. I home school until they go to Kindergarten."

 

:001_huh:

 

I also had another woman say pretty much the same thing by telling me she home schooled her kids until they were 4.

 

I'm not sure I hid the befuddled look on my face. I think what is happening is that some women are saying that being a SAHM is home schooling. Now, of course, I realize that children under the age of 5 learn all the time, and parents are the number one teacher. I get it. To me though there is a difference between school age kids and preschoolers/toddlers/babies.

 

When my kids were under the age of 6 I didn't consider myself a home schooler. I considered myself a SAHM. Now, I am both a SAHM and home school mom. Just because you don't put your child into day care does not mean you are a home schooler, at least in my point of view.

 

It also bugs me when women say they had a natural birth when what they really mean is that they did not have a c-section. Natural, to me, means sans drugs, but that is not the mainstream meaning of natural childbirth anymore.

 

So is the mainstream meaning of home schooling changing as well to include women who are SAHMs to children under school age even when they have no intention at all to home school when their kids are school age?

 

It bugs me too. If your kids aren't school age, then they aren't homeschool age either.

[lionfamily1999]

It bugs me too. If your kids aren't school age, then they aren't homeschool age either.

I guess kids that go to pre-K aren't really going to school then?

 

It bugs me when people insist on arguing about someone else's chosen label for themself.

[LidiyaDawn]

 

It bugs me when people insist on arguing about someone else's chosen label for themself.

:iagree:

 

If you view yourself as a homeschooler, then I'm happy to recognize you as such. :)

[Karen in CO]

For me, I don't considering that homeschooling. I consider that to be parenting and cudos for them for doing so. Many pass that duty onto other people as soon as possible.

 

I don't consider a child homeschooled until they don't report for public or private school as the mandatory age.

 

But then again, I am not a huge supporter of Pre-school in general.

 

This.

It is parenting until they reach the age of compulsory attendance. But I'm always happy when people choose to parent for that long.

[ocelotmom]

D'oh!! I could have at least checked to see if I answered already!

That was my thought, too - "Gee, I wonder if I posted the exact same comment three pages back?" Because I know I've responded similarly to similar threads in the past.

 

 

It is confusing until I realized that this woman likes to be "The Est."

 

...

 

The prettiest.

 

...

 

The sickest.

 

Etc...

 

 

And I bet she does it all with one hand in her pocket, too.

[Mommy22alyns]

I agree with the PP who said it's about intentions. I didn't consider myself a homeschooler until Becca was K age, but then again I didn't consider homeschooling until she was K age.

[mrs.m]

This.

It is parenting until they reach the age of compulsory attendance. But I'm always happy when people choose to parent for that long.

 

Here the compulsory attendence age is 7. Which means that I wasn't really "home schooling" my DS who was in 1st last year? That was a lot of hard core "parenting" especially when we hit the "r" controlled vowels. :lol:

 

I'm ok with them calling it home schooling for preK. I called it that last year for my then 4yo who was wanting to play along. My older two were being home educated and I just lumped them all together. ;)

 

Really I think they are just trying to find an incommon connection to keep the conversation going.

[Mrs Mungo]

Really I think they are just trying to find an incommon connection to keep the conversation going.

 

This is a good point too. A common getting-to-know-you tool is to find common ground.

[Mimm]

This touches off something that annoys me. Daycare is not school. I think people call it school to make themselves feel OK about doing it (I'm not saying it is or is not OK; I just think people who need to justify it do so by calling it school).

 

Depends on the day care. When my youngest was three, I was in school and she went to day care three mornings a week. They did circle time and painted letters and taught them some Spanish words and had different play stations with different types of sensory things. (I'm not real clear on what all they did.) :) They had a curriculum that focused on different things each week. Colors, or animals, or modes of transportation. They had fire safety week and had a real firetruck come and visit. But it was a day care. They didn't call themselves a preschool. They didn't require you to have your children there for any set number of hours. It is associated with the university and teachers and students of the university get first spots, and they charge an hourly rate and let you tailor your schedule to your class schedule. They took babies up to 12 years old after school (I think). Point being, lines can be blurred. It was a "day care" but they did enough educational things with the kids, comparable to what a homeschooling mom with preschool kids would do, that parents could legitimately call it a "school".

[myfunnybunch]

In my area, it is so common to put children in preschool, even for families with a SAHM, that it's not a stretch to consider oneself a homeschooler for preschool. It sounds cooler than, "We didn't want to pay for preschool" or (heaven forbid) "I don't think kids *need* to go to preschool, so I'm keeping my child home with me until kindergarten." LOL

 

I did "preschool" at home. *I* didn't call it homeschooling, I think I called it "preschool at home." But who cares what someone else calls it? Maybe we need a new term....home preschooling? Pre-homeschooling? ;)

 

Cat

[TheAutumnOak]

For me, I don't considering that homeschooling. I consider that to be parenting and cudos for them for doing so. Many pass that duty onto other people as soon as possible.

 

I don't consider a child homeschooled until they don't report for public or private school as the mandatory age.

 

But then again, I am not a huge supporter of Pre-school in general.

 

:iagree: You took the words from my mouth!

[warriormom]

There is something that bugs me. A woman asked me where my boys go to school and I told her we home school. She said, "Oh, I home school my kids as well. I home school until they go to Kindergarten."

 

:001_huh:

 

I also had another woman say pretty much the same thing by telling me she home schooled her kids until they were 4.

 

I'm not sure I hid the befuddled look on my face. I think what is happening is that some women are saying that being a SAHM is home schooling. Now, of course, I realize that children under the age of 5 learn all the time, and parents are the number one teacher. I get it. To me though there is a difference between school age kids and preschoolers/toddlers/babies.

 

When my kids were under the age of 6 I didn't consider myself a home schooler. I considered myself a SAHM. Now, I am both a SAHM and home school mom. Just because you don't put your child into day care does not mean you are a home schooler, at least in my point of view. Well you need to understand. I consider myself an afterschooler with my son (K-4). He goes to a PreK program but I also teach spanish, math, reading, handwriting and art. Honestly I teach more than some moms do who ARE home schoolers. DS just has a great attention span and love for learning. I LOVE that people say that they home school. That means they take responsibility for their child's well-being and education. I think every parent should "home school" or "afterschool" wherever they go. Learning should be like breathing and parents should encourage more of it by leading the way.

 

It also bugs me when women say they had a natural birth when what they really mean is that they did not have a c-section. Natural, to me, means sans drugs, but that is not the mainstream meaning of natural childbirth anymore. LOL! Well, I am apart of the crew who thinks natural childbirth is CRAZY. There is nothing natural about it IMHO. I was just sad that there was not an at-home epidural kit.

 

So is the mainstream meaning of home schooling changing as well to include women who are SAHMs to children under school age even when they have no intention at all to home school when their kids are school age? When everyone is shipping their kids off to MMO or preschool at age 2, I give moms who SAH with their kids credit.....wow, it is great to teach them rather than hiring an overpaid babysitter. When I had toddlers, I was not sure what I would do.

 

Ok, now I will step off of my soap box :)

Edited April 18, 2011 by cabreban

[SonshineLearner]

Funny, because I kinda agree both ways :) I consider every parent a homeschooler... bad or good job. Think of it, I'm acknowledging that outside of school is more important that "in" and every parent is responsible for where their child is educationally speaking. If more people thought this way, perhaps they would homeschool till say... kindergarten, then 1st, then 2nd... then on up. AND, when their child couldn't read in 5th, they could blame themselves and not a teacher that changes each year.

 

:) (I do know what you mean, though :))

[Brindee]

As I was looking through this thread, I was surprised to see that I had already answered, THEN realized it was started a year ago! :D

 

I'm thinking I felt that it WASN'T homeschooling 'til school age is for these reasons:

--K used to be a choice. Many kids didn't go. Pre school? Not even heard of. That's just how it was when I was growing up! Now many people would never consider that their kids NOT go to K, and many places are making pre school mandatory!

--I always thought that parents go with the flow of the kids. One may love books and want to read all the time, some want to write as soon as they can, some want to learn letters and words so they can read. And many are a variety of these. So, as a parent of my oldest, we did lots of reading, letters, words, spelling, writing because he really wanted to. As a parent, I wanted him to move forward in these positive goals. I wasn't MAKING him do it (which to me equated with school), I was doing it with him as he asked because he loved it! So, he could read and write at a youngish age because we worked together as mom and son on something he loved. My second slept a lot, and loved Legos, but he could care less about talking, letters, reading, or anything "scholastic/educational." So I didn't do those same things with him, because he wasn't interested, and I saw no point in making him do it when he was younger. My youngest, dd, learned the baby sign language because she was very aware of what people were saying, and copied their gestures. She learned it quickly and communicated very well with that, and then words when very young. So each one was different and I worked with them differently....not to "school" them, but because I was their mom!

 

We did Spanish and sign language "classes", science experiments, all sorts of things that could be considered "school" by some. Still to me it was just cuz I'm their mom and we chose to do that.

 

To me, calling it "schooling" takes away the special parental tie with the child, doing things to encourage them and because you love them so much. We did the same thing helping them learn to roll over, crawl and walk, yet didn't call THAT schooling! To me that would be silly, it's just what parents over the years have always done. So, to suddenly be calling these things "schooling" was foreign to me!

 

So, that's where I'm coming from. But, I also can understand where others are coming from when they choose to call it homeschooling! I don't think either way of saying it is more right than the other. It's whatever works for the parents, I think. I'm just explaining my thoughts on it. :D

[catz]

I really don't know why it would matter. Homeschooling is a natural extension of parenting. A mother is a teaching mother. If an unschooler doesn't use a curriculum even though the child is school age, they are still being homeschooled.

 

Now granted you may have a different definition of homeschooling than she understands, but likely each of us on the board will vary in many ways in our opinions as well. Some see finding a pair of shoes as math and someone else may not feel that "counts" (pun!:D) unless it's a CLE program. Neither is better, it's just perspective.

 

Her definition does not makes yours any less valid. And yours does not make hers any less valid. She may feel that she did homeschool them. So what does that matter to you?

 

:iagree: I guess I don't have a problem with this use of the term. I know people locally who've had infants and preschoolers they've sworn up and down they were going to homeschool that later did an about face and sent them to school. Just because someone intends to send their kid to school later doesn't mean they are not homeschooling. My kids may go to school at some point too. Who knows. My kids never had formal curriclum at preschool ages, but we did learning and exploring all the time. Homeschool was not on my radar at that age but somehow my kids ended up wildly ahead and PS was not a good fit for my oldest.

 

I also have friends that send their kids to PS and have so much time invested in afterschooling, enrichments, and volunteering I think they're doing a better job than other hands off homeschoolers I know. I don't think using the term homeschooling necessarily equates to anything of meaning.

[ocelotmom]

I also have friends that send their kids to PS and have so much time invested in afterschooling, enrichments, and volunteering I think they're doing a better job than other hands off homeschoolers I know. I don't think using the term homeschooling necessarily equates to anything of meaning.

 

A theme I'm seeing throughout this thread is that value is being assigned to a certain concept (in this case, homeschooling or natural birth), and people who have done similar accomplishments may be feeling that their accomplishments aren't recognized because they don't meet the criteria to qualify as homeschool/natural birth/whatever, and are therefore claiming something that isn't actually reality.

 

The mom you're discussing, or the afterschooling mom above, is putting in a lot of effort to provide her child with a great education. Quite likely more than I am as a homeschooling mom. That's wonderful, and she should be proud. She shouldn't need to call it homeschooling in order to have it recognized (either by herself or others).

 

The mom who has a 48 hour hard labor with a 2 hour morphine-induced nap in the middle has done something amazing. Much moreso, IMO, than my relatively easy 8 hour natural birth. Maybe it wasn't "natural", but that doesn't make it any less something to be proud of.

 

Don't devalue other's accomplishments by assigning too high a value to a broad concept. Don't devalue your own accomplishments by calling them something they're not.

Edited April 18, 2011 by ocelotmom

[unsinkable]

That was my thought, too - "Gee, I wonder if I posted the exact same comment three pages back?" Because I know I've responded similarly to similar threads in the past.

 

 

 

 

And I bet she does it all with one hand in her pocket, too.

 

I'm not following you, here...:confused:

[SweetMissMagnolia]

hmmmm I did "lessons" with him well before he was even close to pre-school age because he was ready to learn to read so we did phonics/reading --simple writing-maybe simple preschool skills (activities-dot to dot,tracing letters,etc)---but not sure I called it homeschooling until he was "school age" ...hmmm lol....

[Joanne]

IMO, I created an intentional, specific tone and atmosphere when my children were littles. It was not "preschool" and it wasn't homeschooling.

 

I consider homeschooling to have started at the ages when my children would have been enrolled in school if they attended a traditional setting.

[bluemongoose]

I see both sides, and I am one who has used the homeschooling title when my oldest child was 3yo. And I do say I have been homeschooling for 3yrs. My oldest is 6yo right now.

 

I understand calling something homeschooling that is simply the ABC song and learning numbers and colors is using the term very loosely. I can see that people who are in the midst of Latin and Algebra would scoff at people claiming to homeschool who are doing preschool level work.

 

On the other hand, there are those of us with very precocious children who cannot find a way to fit anywhere! Homeschoolers dont want to claim us because our children are not old enough for compulsory attendance. (Which in my state would not be for another year for us.) Yet our children are clearly doing K-3rd grade level work. Some homeschoolers act annoyed by said precocious 3yo telling them about addition and subtraction, what echolocation is, and reading something they have printed on their shirt.

 

Then the preschool/play groups dont want us because we look too hard core. Statements such as "you are going to emotionally damage your child because you are pushing them and ruining their childhood" are flung around to deflect their feelings of inadequacy because they compare their child to mine.

 

So when you have a 2.5yo who is reading (really reading) and then they grow to a 3yo child who demands "school" or else!, what do you call yourself? I am a homeschooler. I have been homeschooling for 3 yrs now, real elementary, full curriculum homeschooling. I honestly do not know what else to call myself!

[Tammyla]

Many people here call two-year-old toddler care pre-K.

 

My opinion was not to consider us homeschooling until my child(ren) were of mandatory attendance age.

[mamalbh]

There is something that bugs me. A woman asked me where my boys go to school and I told her we home school. She said, "Oh, I home school my kids as well. I home school until they go to Kindergarten."

 

:001_huh:

 

I also had another woman say pretty much the same thing by telling me she home schooled her kids until they were 4.

 

I'm not sure I hid the befuddled look on my face. I think what is happening is that some women are saying that being a SAHM is home schooling. Now, of course, I realize that children under the age of 5 learn all the time, and parents are the number one teacher. I get it. To me though there is a difference between school age kids and preschoolers/toddlers/babies.

 

When my kids were under the age of 6 I didn't consider myself a home schooler. I considered myself a SAHM. Now, I am both a SAHM and home school mom. Just because you don't put your child into day care does not mean you are a home schooler, at least in my point of view.

 

:iagree:

 

Here's the way I look at it:

Teaching kids stuff is being a parent; homeschooling is one of a few options to met the legal requirement of education - SCHOOL.

In other words...

If your child is not yet school-aged (most places 5yrs and up) then they simply aren't "in school", if they are school-aged then they are doing one of the following:

a) public school

b) private school

c) home school

 

I, as well as every other parent, have taught my children many things. I taught oldest dd to read at 3yrs, but I would not consider it 'school' until they are 'school-age'. If you live somewhere that requires preK, or where the vast majority of folks consider it necessary, then I could see saying that you homeschool a 4 year old. Other than that situation, 5 is the youngest I would called homeschooled regardless of what was being taught when.

Edited April 18, 2011 by mamalbh
typos

[My3Monkeys]

I considered us homeschoolers when my oldest was a preschooler. To me, it wasn't what we were doing as much as my intention was to homeschool (and had been since birth). If asked, I would say we were planning to homeschool, but that was the time that I really started making some connections and seeing what was out there.

[Koerarmoca]

As a former PreK teacher who became a SAHM when my kids reached School aged. I of course taught them at home from toddler hood-preK. ALL my kids (with the exception) of my toddler have attended some form of formal Kindergarten (even if it was just a partial year) I never called it "homeschooling" I just said we didn't do preschool/preK we learn at home. funny thing is ALL their kindergarten teachers wanted to know what wonderful preK school they must of attended :lol:

[dirty ethel rackham]

 

BUT, it is kind of bothersome when people act like teaching a 3-5 year old to read is the same as teaching my 15 year old how to do Algebra. It's not the same level of commitment being with your adorable preschooler all day v. your argumentative teen.

 

But does that make it not homeschooling? By that logic, a 1st grade teacher is not really a teacher compared to a high school calculus teacher. Yes, the level of commitment and responsibility goes up as the children get older, but it doesn't mean that it is not homeschooling when the kids were younger.

 

Also, I have seen some 4yos that were so high maintenance, that teaching a high schooler physics was a cake walk.

 

BTDT with the high maintenance 4 yo - when I was seriously worried about his behavior and learning difficulties that I spent hours each night researching ways to deal with him and help him learn after an exhausting day.

BTDT with the argumentative teen. Both situations broke my heart and pushed me to the edge.

 

I do hear what you are saying when people who don't know what they are talking about try to "out-martyr" you, but I have been insulted by people who told me that I wasn't homeschooling yet when I was working with my 4yo on making canopic jars for his history fair entry.

[Rosie_0801]

Well I am a homeschooler because it is the socially nice thing to be:

 

Lady at playgroup: Oh, how old is your daughter?

Me: She's 4.

Lady at playgroup: So does she go to kinder?

Me: No.

Lady at playgroup: Next year then?

Me: No.

Lady at playgroup: Oh. (What a rude and abrupt person. I'm going to get up and talk to someone else.)

 

OR

 

Lady at playgroup: Oh, how old is your daughter?

Me: She's 4.

Lady at playgroup: So does she go to kinder?

Me: No.

Lady at playgroup: Next year then?

Me: No, we're homeschoolers.

Lady at playgroup: Oh right. So, like, do you get the books and stuff from the school or what?

Me: Um. I suppose you can, but you don't have to. There's a whole lot of different ways of organising yourself and lots of info on the internet. I don't know how they managed before the internet! (Actually I do, but this is about being polite.) Besides, she's only 4 so all "school" is at the moment is the usual little kid stuff like puzzles, drawing and teaching her to count that every one does.

Lady at playgroup: Oh, that's nice.

Then I have to ask how old her little one is so she can tell me he is enjoying kinder, so I can say "That's wonderful. Isn't it great when you find a good kinder? It should be fun at this age, shouldn't it?"

Then, of course, she gets up and goes to talk to someone else, but I've made sure she (and everyone else I have to have this conversation with) will actually speak to me again.

 

Rosie

[kalanamak]

There is something that bugs me. A woman asked me where my boys go to school and I told her we home school. She said, "Oh, I home school my kids as well. I home school until they go to Kindergarten."

 

:001_huh:

 

I also had another woman say pretty much the same thing by telling me she home schooled her kids until they were 4.

 

 

 

Perhaps they were just trying to be conversational.

[Jean in Newcastle]

So is this the newest front in the Mommy Wars?

[mommaduck]

So is this the newest front in the Mommy Wars?

 

I was wondering the same thing.

[LMD]

So is this the newest front in the Mommy Wars?

 

yep, I think so. I've encountered that comment too, and it seems to be a competitive/insecurity thing.

 

"we homeschool"

"oh yes, I taught my DC to read before they went to school"

um, ok... :001_huh:

[JessReplanted]

This.

It is parenting until they reach the age of compulsory attendance. But I'm always happy when people choose to parent for that long.

 

Although compulsory attendance differs from state to state. In PA, it is the September that your child is 8, which will be this Sept. for us. Trust me, I have been homeschooling my son for years. ;)

[teachmejoy]

There is something that bugs me. A woman asked me where my boys go to school and I told her we home school. She said, "Oh, I home school my kids as well. I home school until they go to Kindergarten."

 

:001_huh:

 

I also had another woman say pretty much the same thing by telling me she home schooled her kids until they were 4.

 

I'm not sure I hid the befuddled look on my face. I think what is happening is that some women are saying that being a SAHM is home schooling. Now, of course, I realize that children under the age of 5 learn all the time, and parents are the number one teacher. I get it. To me though there is a difference between school age kids and preschoolers/toddlers/babies.

 

When my kids were under the age of 6 I didn't consider myself a home schooler. I considered myself a SAHM. Now, I am both a SAHM and home school mom. Just because you don't put your child into day care does not mean you are a home schooler, at least in my point of view.

 

It also bugs me when women say they had a natural birth when what they really mean is that they did not have a c-section. Natural, to me, means sans drugs, but that is not the mainstream meaning of natural childbirth anymore.

 

So is the mainstream meaning of home schooling changing as well to include women who are SAHMs to children under school age even when they have no intention at all to home school when their kids are school age?

 

:iagree: I have wondered some of the same things!!! When I say natural birth, I mean I had a 29 hour labor with NO pain meds at home! Now that's natural! :D

[Ginevra]

I've had that before. I even had that from someone who DID send kids to both preschool and public school and never actually homeschooled a day in her life. She had some educational materials that she gave to me and said, "Here are some of my homeschooling materials you can use if you want them." It was a couple of things: flashcards, calculadders and a few little things such as that. I was a little like :confused:, but decided to take it as a compliment that she was trying to be a cool homeschooler like me! :D

[lionfamily1999]

So is this the newest front in the Mommy Wars?

Is it new though? Or just another version of the "they're not real homeschoolers" arguments?

 

People give certain groups a lot of carp for being so fractured and mean to each other. This is just an example of how any group made up of enough people can start creating their own barometers for who is really part of their club.

 

I HOMESCHOOL my youngest, he's four. I do, I HOMESCHOOL him. I tell people I do and... I do. Don't like it? Well, then I guess I'm glad I HOMESCHOOL so I don't have to live up to your standards :D (Not you, Jean ;) )

 

Although compulsory attendance differs from state to state. In PA, it is the September that your child is 8, which will be this Sept. for us. Trust me, I have been homeschooling my son for years. ;)

Here's the way I look at it:

Teaching kids stuff is being a parent; homeschooling is one of a few options to met the legal requirement of education - SCHOOL.

In other words...

If your child is not yet school-aged (most places 5yrs and up) then they simply aren't "in school", if they are school-aged then they are doing one of the following:

a) public school

b) private school

c) home school

 

I, as well as every other parent, have taught my children many things. I taught oldest dd to read at 3yrs, but I would not consider it 'school' until they are 'school-age'. If you live somewhere that requires preK, or where the vast majority of folks consider it necessary, then I could see saying that you homeschool a 4 year old. Other than that situation, 5 is the youngest I would called homeschooled regardless of what was being taught when.

So you'd tell the poster I quoted above you that she's not homeschooling? I guess I won't (by your standards) be homeschooling my youngest until first grade............. So, it's not actual homeschooling unless the state recognizes it as such? What about states that don't make you report in. Texas, I believe, does not require any notification. Does that mean homeschoolers in Texas don't exist?

But does that make it not homeschooling? By that logic, a 1st grade teacher is not really a teacher compared to a high school calculus teacher. Yes, the level of commitment and responsibility goes up as the children get older, but it doesn't mean that it is not homeschooling when the kids were younger.

 

Also, I have seen some 4yos that were so high maintenance, that teaching a high schooler physics was a cake walk.

 

BTDT with the high maintenance 4 yo - when I was seriously worried about his behavior and learning difficulties that I spent hours each night researching ways to deal with him and help him learn after an exhausting day.

BTDT with the argumentative teen. Both situations broke my heart and pushed me to the edge.

 

I do hear what you are saying when people who don't know what they are talking about try to "out-martyr" you, but I have been insulted by people who told me that I wasn't homeschooling yet when I was working with my 4yo on making canopic jars for his history fair entry.

:iagree: And perhaps it is a new facet of the mommy wars. A sahm isn't as much woman as a working mom, because she doesn't really work ;) ;) A bottle using mom isn't as good a mom because she's not breastfeeding until jr is officially in school. Homeschooling moms don't really teach their children until they reach the age when they have to be reported to the state. :001_rolleyes:

[HS Mom in NC]

I totally agree with the original post.

[My3Monkeys]

I've had that before. I even had that from someone who DID send kids to both preschool and public school and never actually homeschooled a day in her life. She had some educational materials that she gave to me and said, "Here are some of my homeschooling materials you can use if you want them." It was a couple of things: flashcards, calculadders and a few little things such as that. I was a little like :confused:, but decided to take it as a compliment that she was trying to be a cool homeschooler like me! :D

 

If a non-homeschooler said something like this, I would take it as she was offering you 'materials that are published for homeschooling' that she had used not 'materials that she used to homeschool with.'

[Jean in Newcastle]

Is it new though? Or just another version of the "they're not real homeschoolers" arguments?

 

People give certain groups a lot of carp for being so fractured and mean to each other. This is just an example of how any group made up of enough people can start creating their own barometers for who is really part of their club.

 

I HOMESCHOOL my youngest, he's four. I do, I HOMESCHOOL him. I tell people I do and... I do. Don't like it? Well, then I guess I'm glad I HOMESCHOOL so I don't have to live up to your standards :D (Not you, Jean ;) )

 

 

 

 

No argument from me! As someone else said, it seems silly to judge what people called THEMSELVES.

[bluemongoose]

No argument from me! As someone else said, it seems silly to judge what people called THEMSELVES.

:iagree:

[mamalbh]

So you'd tell the poster I quoted above you that she's not homeschooling? I guess I won't (by your standards) be homeschooling my youngest until first grade............. If you re-read my post, you'll see I say nothing about compulsory age. I refer to 'school-age', which most people consider 5 & up (grade K & up).

 

So, it's not actual homeschooling unless the state recognizes it as such? What about states that don't make you report in. Texas, I believe, does not require any notification. Does that mean homeschoolers in Texas don't exist? I also do not say anything about whether or not one has to report.

 

 

 

If you want to say you're homeschooling a 4yr old - that's fine. It's just that *I* wouldn't, and I don't really get why someone would.

 

I like what Mark Twain has to say about it - "I have never let my schooling interfer with my education." To me, the terminology 'school' is not synonymous with learning.

[Jean in Newcastle]

If you want to say you're homeschooling a 4yr old - that's fine. It's just that *I* wouldn't, and I don't really get why someone would.

 

 

 

So don't say it. But also don't be judgmental of someone who does. While I realize that some who have had absolutely no exposure to homeschooling and who doesn't plan to homeschool for the actual school years probably isn't saying it with the same meaning, someone like Lionfamily, who has had lots of experience with homeschooling over the years, does have a reason why they would label it this way.

[Rosie_0801]

If you want to say you're homeschooling a 4yr old - that's fine. It's just that *I* wouldn't, and I don't really get why someone would.

 

How odd. More than one of us has explained why we do. :confused:

 

Of course I only call myself a homeschooler if I'm talking to non-homeschoolers. :tongue_smilie:

 

Rosie

[mamalbh]

Rosie, in your example conversation here's how I would handle it (I am NOT saying there's a right and a wrong, I'm just illustrating a different point of view)

 

Lady at playgroup: Oh, how old is your daughter?

Me: She's 4.

Lady at playgroup: So does she go to kinder?

Me: No.

Lady at playgroup: Next year then?

Me: Yes (I call my dc grades by state cutoff dates, regardless of where they are academically)

Lady at playgroup: Oh, what school will she go to?

Me: She'll be homeschooled

Lady: blah blah blah

Me: Blah blah blah

Lady: Nice chatting with you

Me: Yeah, nice to meet you

[Rosie_0801]

Oops. When I said kinder, I meant preK. (I forgot to switch dialects!)

 

I can't use your example, because dd is doing another year of preschool so we won't be homeschooling next year any more than we are this year. But if I say I don't send dd to preschool, I will sound as though I think they are wasting their time by doing so, and I'll sound lazy. Then they won't like me any more so I'll have no one to talk to. Unfortunately I'll look rude if I bring a book. :tongue_smilie:

 

"We homeschool" sounds official and makes everyone feel better. I've tried "Oh, we do preschool at home" but they keep asking questions so I still have to say we homeschool. It's faster and less awkward just to come out and say so in the first place. I don't know why I get different reactions when they mean the same thing, but I do. I promise I'm not a loser who says "we homeschool" to try and sound cool :D

 

If people think not attending 4 year old kinder is shocking (and they do even though they know it is not compulsory. At least I think they know it isn't :confused:) it'll be even worse next year when she's 5. If she's not at school, she should be in kinder and the only excuse for not being in kinder is to be homeschooling. It's easier to get the conversation over and done with.

 

Oddly enough, I'm starting to find that being the resident homeschooler at play group, I am getting the occasional question about teaching reading as though I'm some sort of authority on the subject. If I wasn't thought of that way, they wouldn't be asking and that'd be a shame. This is a low socio economic area and it wouldn't occur to some of these mums that they could teach their own children to read. If their kids are having trouble down the track, perhaps they will now think of doing something about it instead of just floundering around worrying and waiting for the school to fix it. I think that's valuable enough to justify my bit of "faking." ;)

 

Rosie

[Jean in Newcastle]

 

If people think not attending 4 year old kinder is shocking (and they do even though they know it is not compulsory. At least I think they know it isn't :confused:) it'll be even worse next year when she's 5. If she's not at school, she should be in kinder and the only excuse for not being in kinder is to be homeschooling. It's easier to get the conversation over and done with.

 

 

 

Rosie - even in my neighborhood across the big pond, I got the "it's shocking that your 4 year old isn't in preschool" looks and comments.

[Mergath]

Oh good grief. Every other week I open another post telling me I'm not really a homeschooler, after all.

 

My dd will be three next month, and we've been doing a lot of structured academic learning for several months now, because dd loves it. A lot of what she's doing are things that I didn't learn until kindergarten. When people ask which preschool she's going to go to in September- which is not something that people don't do around here- we tell them that we homeschool. I've never once had anyone say, "Well, not really, since you haven't reached the compulsory age for education set by your state government."

 

I've been planning to hs and learning about it since I was pregnant, and by god, I'm going to call myself a homeschooler.

[lionfamily1999]

So you'd tell the poster I quoted above you that she's not homeschooling? I guess I won't (by your standards) be homeschooling my youngest until first grade............. If you re-read my post, you'll see I say nothing about compulsory age. I refer to 'school-age', which most people consider 5 & up (grade K & up).

 

So, it's not actual homeschooling unless the state recognizes it as such? What about states that don't make you report in. Texas, I believe, does not require any notification. Does that mean homeschoolers in Texas don't exist? I also do not say anything about whether or not one has to report.

 

If you want to say you're homeschooling a 4yr old - that's fine. It's just that *I* wouldn't, and I don't really get why someone would.

 

I like what Mark Twain has to say about it - "I have never let my schooling interfer with my education." To me, the terminology 'school' is not synonymous with learning.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, so it's up to us to decide what "school age" means, but NOT whether or not we homeschool? That makes perfect sense ;)

 

I wish their was a kneeling smiley. Yes, yes, you are the bestest most superiorest. (pat hand pat hand) and back away slowly.

 

 

Rosie - even in my neighborhood across the big pond, I got the "it's shocking that your 4 year old isn't in preschool" looks and comments.

Me too.

Oh good grief. Every other week I open another post telling me I'm not really a homeschooler, after all.

 

My dd will be three next month, and we've been doing a lot of structured academic learning for several months now, because dd loves it. A lot of what she's doing are things that I didn't learn until kindergarten. When people ask which preschool she's going to go to in September- which is not something that people don't do around here- we tell them that we homeschool. I've never once had anyone say, "Well, not really, since you haven't reached the compulsory age for education set by your state government."

 

I've been planning to hs and learning about it since I was pregnant, and by god, I'm going to call myself a homeschooler.

Y'know what's funny, Mergath? One moment the barometer is COMPULSORY school age, the next it's "whatever school age means to you." :shrug: I guess we need to start our own club, mothers that homeschool their littles, regardless of what other people want to call it. :001_rolleyes:

[Down_the_Rabbit_Hole]

Personally it doesn't bother me. Different people have different definitions of homeschool. Those moms felt they homeschooled their children during the pre-school years and who are we to say they did not.

 

As for the natural birth comment, if you are going to split hairs, then the only natural birth is with no medical intervention at all.