Vent: Elementary School Graduation

[MinivanMom]

So our local elementary schools make a huge deal out of 5th grade graduation: caps & gowns, diplomas, the whole deal. They make a bigger deal than the middle school does for their 8th grade graduation; the middle school runs the 8th grade graduation more like an academic awards ceremony, and the kids just wear dressy clothes. I think the whole idea of "elementary school graduation" is ridiculous, but it's become the norm in our community. People expect it and make a big deal with relatives coming in and parties and such.

 

Anyway, my 5th grader was at a church activity this week, and one of the other kids asked whether there was a "homeschool graduation" that we went to . . . you know . . . to celebrate the momentous completion of 5th grade. The kids were shocked and upset that there would be no recognition for the poor homeschool children and kind of gave my kid a hard time about it, enough so that one of the leaders made a point afterward of telling me what had transpired. Thankfully, I have a level-headed kid who laughed about it, but for some reason it left me feeling so annoyed.

 

What is up with elementary school graduations?!

[shawthorne44]

I think it is an extension of All Kids Get Awards.  

 

They do it in my area too.  I've heard discussions around me at work about graduation parties.  I thought that it was odd that so many kids of co-workers were graduating high school.  But, no, it is the misc. silly graduations.  

 

I don't understand it.  Even as a kid I didn't want to go to my high school graduation.  It basically meant I showed up more or less every day and didn't annoy my teachers.  I did more than that, but to graduate that is all that was required.  

[Bootsie]

The cap and gown companies found a new place to market their goods.  I lived in an area where this was common for kindergarten!

[Dmmetler]

It's a big deal in my area, too. DD10 said she didn't mind, but then I found her making little tiny mortarboards for her plastic snakes to celebrate their graduation from "Serpentville Elementary".

 

At the school I used to teach at, they not only did a 6th grade graduation and class trip, but a 6th grade debut and formal, where the boys wore tuxedos and the girls wore white formals, were presented on stage, their parents' names given, and a list of their accomplishments read, followed by a formal dance-where the 6th grade girls hung on one side and ignored the boys, and the boys acted like 6th grade boys. The rationale was that "this may be their last chance". No thought that maybe, just maybe, it might be good for them to have something to look forward to if they didn't have all the trappings of being a high school senior at age 12?

 

 

[Library Momma]

We do not have that here.  We used to have an 8th grade graduation, but that was before our town built its high school.  After 8th students would go their separate ways to a variety of high schools, so the ceremony was really to say goodbye.  Now that we do have a high school it is no longer a graduation but an awards ceremony.  It is actually the first time students in the school system have the opportunity to win any sort of academic award (given by the school).

 

Some pre-schools also do a graduation with little paper caps but that is also more of a goodbye party as well.

[Farrar]

I think that sometimes these things can be meaningful. I don't object to them per se. But the idea that they're absolutely clear, needed for all rites of passage is just so silly.

 

We finish 5th grade at the end of the summer. It didn't even occur to me until this moment that we should do anything to celebrate it. Drat.

[MamaChicken]

I asked my recent 5th grade graduate how it felt to be an official "middle schooler."  He looked at me like I had grown a second head, and reminded me that since he was already doing middle-high school work that it really didn't matter.  No graduation gown necessary :)

[Ellie]

We finish 5th grade at the end of the summer. It didn't even occur to me until this moment that we should do anything to celebrate it. Drat.

 

Slacker. :laugh:

 

[Farrar]

Slacker. :laugh:

 

 

Well, clearly, I'll be ordering caps and gowns and reserving a fancy hall of some sort after seeing this thread.

 

Or not. Maybe we'll go out for dinner or something.

[skirch]

Oh yeah, they do that here too. Preschool graduation, kindergarten graduation, 5th grade graduation and 8th grade graduation. It seems to me that by the time they get to the big one that counts, it's old hat and not something special. 

[OneStepAtATime]

I understand your irritation and I am sorry that your child had to go through that.  I would like to present another side, though, if I may.

 

FWIW, my child attended a school that had a 5th grade graduation ceremony and it meant a lot to her.  She knew she would be homeschooling the next fall.  She knew that none of her friends would be.  And all the students knew that every one of them would be scattering to the four winds.  They were all going off to different Middle Schools, some to charter schools, some to private schools, some to ps middle schools in a different area, etc.  Each 5th grader had the chance to stand up and speak about their time at the school and their hopes and plans for the future.  It was a chance to say goodbye, to thank teachers and friends, and to put some closure to their time at that school.  Some kids, including my daughter, had been at that school off and on for 7 years.  She was attached.  It was hard leaving.  The school ended at 5th grade so no one could have stayed longer even if they wanted to.  Having that ceremony helped them to say goodbye.  They didn't have caps and gowns, but we did make a big deal out of it.  There was a gathering of all the parents and 5th grade teachers and any extended family, we ate, visited, shared memories, etc.  I do not regret for one moment DD having a chance to acknowledge her time at that school and the transition into Middle School.  She needed it.

 

If I had been homeschooling at that point would we have had a big ceremony?  No.  I don't think we would have.  It isn't the same thing.  It wouldn't have been necessary or needed, IMHO.  

 

DD is moving from 8th to 9th.  Will there be a ceremony?  No.  It isn't needed.  She isn't changing schools, leaving behind memories and friends, etc.  We're just moving on to the next thing.  

 

While I agree that ceremonies like going from 5th to 6th grade seem over the top and silly looking at it from a homeschooler's perspective, brick and mortar school is a different animal.   I don't regret DD having that ceremony at all.  It was to give the kids a sense of closure and to help them feel better about leaving the academic home they had known for many years.  It was nice.

[Ellie]

I understand your irritation and I am sorry that your child had to go through that.  I would like to present another side, though, if I may.

 

FWIW, my child attended a school that had a 5th grade graduation ceremony and it meant a lot to her.  She knew she would be homeschooling the next fall.  She knew that none of her friends would be.  And all the students knew that every one of them would be scattering to the four winds.  They were all going off to different Middle Schools, some to charter schools, some to private schools, some to ps middle schools in a different area, etc.  Each 5th grader had the chance to stand up and speak about their time at the school and their hopes and plans for the future.  It was a chance to say goodbye, to thank teachers and friends, and to put some closure to their time at that school.  Some kids, including my daughter, had been at that school off and on for 7 years.  She was attached.  It was hard leaving.  The school ended at 5th grade so no one could have stayed longer even if they wanted to.  Having that ceremony helped them to say goodbye.  They didn't have caps and gowns, but we did make a big deal out of it.  There was a gathering of all the parents and 5th grade teachers and any extended family, we ate, visited, shared memories, etc.  I do not regret for one moment DD having a chance to acknowledge her time at that school and the transition into Middle School.  She needed it.

 

If I had been homeschooling at that point would we have had a big ceremony?  No.  I don't think we would have.  It isn't the same thing.  It wouldn't have been necessary or needed, IMHO.  

 

DD is moving from 8th to 9th.  Will there be a ceremony?  No.  It isn't needed.  She isn't changing schools, leaving behind memories and friends, etc.  We're just moving on to the next thing.  

 

While I agree that ceremonies like going from 5th to 6th grade seem over the top and silly looking at it from a homeschooler's perspective, brick and mortar school is a different animal.   I don't regret DD having that ceremony at all.  It was to give the kids a sense of closure and to help them feel better about leaving the academic home they had known for many years.  It was nice.

 

I don't mind a "ceremony." It's calling a kindergarten/fifth grade promotion a "graduation" and including caps and gowns that I find...silly. A *graduation* should be saved for high school and college events.

 

[Sherry in OH]

Local church schools have graduation ceremonies for students who have completed their highest grades, 6th or 8th, depending on the school.  But those students are moving on to other school systems. 

 

The nearby public elementary school had a clap out for 4^th graders on the last day of school.  They will move to the intermediate school for 5^th and 6^th.  6^th graders celebrated the end of the year with a picnic lunch.  Our school district has several elementary schools, but only one intermediate (5th and 6th) and one middle school (7th and 8th).  The students move from school to school together.  Perhaps that is why elementary graduation isn't a big deal here.

[MinivanMom]

I understand your irritation and I am sorry that your child had to go through that.  I would like to present another side, though, if I may.

 

FWIW, my child attended a school that had a 5th grade graduation ceremony and it meant a lot to her.  She knew she would be homeschooling the next fall.  She knew that none of her friends would be.  And all the students knew that every one of them would be scattering to the four winds.  They were all going off to different Middle Schools, some to charter schools, some to private schools, some to ps middle schools in a different area, etc.  Each 5th grader had the chance to stand up and speak about their time at the school and their hopes and plans for the future.  It was a chance to say goodbye, to thank teachers and friends, and to put some closure to their time at that school.  Some kids, including my daughter, had been at that school off and on for 7 years.  She was attached.  It was hard leaving.  The school ended at 5th grade so no one could have stayed longer even if they wanted to.  Having that ceremony helped them to say goodbye.  They didn't have caps and gowns, but we did make a big deal out of it.  There was a gathering of all the parents and 5th grade teachers and any extended family, we ate, visited, shared memories, etc.  I do not regret for one moment DD having a chance to acknowledge her time at that school and the transition into Middle School.  She needed it.

 

If I had been homeschooling at that point would we have had a big ceremony?  No.  I don't think we would have.  It isn't the same thing.  It wouldn't have been necessary or needed, IMHO.  

 

DD is moving from 8th to 9th.  Will there be a ceremony?  No.  It isn't needed.  She isn't changing schools, leaving behind memories and friends, etc.  We're just moving on to the next thing.  

 

While I agree that ceremonies like going from 5th to 6th grade seem over the top and silly looking at it from a homeschooler's perspective, brick and mortar school is a different animal.   I don't regret DD having that ceremony at all.  It was to give the kids a sense of closure and to help them feel better about leaving the academic home they had known for many years.  It was nice.

 

I completely get this perspective.

 

Here, though, the elementary students are all moving as a group to the same middle school. Nobody is saying goodbye, so the gaps & gowns and parties do seem a little over the top. I tend to be in live & let live mode for this kind of thing normally, but I do feel irritated that my kid was given a hard time.

[Tanaqui]

 

It's a big deal in my area, too. DD10 said she didn't mind, but then I found her making little tiny mortarboards for her plastic snakes to celebrate their graduation from "Serpentville Elementary".

 

OMG that is adorable.

 

I think that if people are hauling in relatives and whatever then maybe it's just an excuse for them to take pictures and talk about how much the kids have grown and they ought to get together more often.

[arliemaria]

I remember my Kindergarten graduation, but I don't think it is very possible or necessary to replicate that as a homeschooler.  We will continue on until September when I will promote Robby to first grade.  I want to make and present him with a schultute for his first day of first grade.  I think we have to emphasize the beginning to differentiate our days.

[Dmmetler]

Here's the graduation picture :)

[Tanaqui]

Aww! Quick question. How do they throw their caps in the air at the end of the ceremony?

[mom2bee]

"Graduation" is for 12th grade or after. I think that an annual ceremony for grades especially for the senior group of that institute is appropriate and can also be very soothing. But using the word "graduation" is just a little silly, giving the cultural and historic meaning of the word in the US.

[Southern Ivy]

Here's the graduation picture :)

 

I seriously adore your daughter and all the things she does. She will probably never convert me to being a snake lover...or even a snake tolerator...but she's still pretty awesome!

[Southern Ivy]

You all would have hated my private school end of the year ceremonies. We had a huge end of the year program with each grade doing a 15-30 minute presentation/performance. Then, we had K5 and 6th grade graduations. High school graduation was later. 
They have since scaled back to just K5, 6th, and 12th. 

I think the 5 year olds are adorable in their cap and gown and when I was their age, it was a big deal. I was so excited by it. It meant I got to move upstairs with the big kids. But, by 6th, I found it kind of stupid because I was just moving to the end of the hall and not going to college. 

[UCF612]

I taught Kindergarten at a private school this past year. The school always does a K graduation and a high school graduation. I dreaded doing the K graduation because it was not something I did as a kid and always thought it was silly. As it turns out the whole thing was adorable. My class performed something for each subject, we sang favorite songs and just got to show off to parents what we'd spent the year learning/doing. The cap and gown part was a tiny piece of the night. Anyhow I actually enjoyed it and loved seeing my little guy in his cap and gown. I know I'll love comparing his K picture to his senior year picture. All that to say I get K graduation a little more now. BUT I don't get the multiple graduations for everything because that totally diminishes the high school & college commencements. As we return to homeschooling we definitely won't be doing mini graduations!

[MinivanMom]

Okay, I must have grown up under a rock, because I didn't "graduate" from preschool, kindergarten or 5th grade.

 

We did have an 8th grade graduation at the Junior High with diplomas, but no caps & gowns. I enjoyed that, and I understood the significance of it to students & families who didn't expect to graduate high school. The kindergarten/elementary stuff seems new to me.

[MinivanMom]

Here's the graduation picture :)

 

Awwww! That is adorable!

[Curlymom]

I had a kindergarten graduation (private school), did not have a 5th grade graduation (still private school), had an 8th grade graduation (public school), and then so on to high school and college graduations.

 

Our school district has kinder graduations, which both if my kids participated in since they were in public school at the time. It was cute. I have no idea if they do other graduations, all I know of is high school. But, end of year awards ceremonies are HUGE around here. My FB feed has been clogged with pictures and awards.

 

But I really don't think the kids around here brag about them. I'm pretty sure my daughter didn't when she was in public school. But every kid got an award so there really wasn't a sense of competition between the kids.

 

However, I know the ceremony was important to her so this year we had our own awards ceremony. I found a bunch of free awards online, filled them out and printed them, and we had our own end of year ceremony. It was small and it was just us and my kids loved it. It also served as a promotion, and I know it gave them a sense of completion and accomplishment for the school year.

[Bootsie]

What i find more annoying is that many "graduations" aren't really graduations.  Most universities today do not have graduations--they have "commencement ceremonies."  Students do not necessarily meet graduation requirements to participate.  I have had to stand in a line shaking hands and saying "congratulations" to students in a cap and gown who I know just failed my class and aren't really graduating.  Mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, etc. in the audience do not necessarily know that Johnny did not graduate.  

[shawthorne44]

What i find more annoying is that many "graduations" aren't really graduations.  Most universities today do not have graduations--they have "commencement ceremonies."  Students do not necessarily meet graduation requirements to participate.  I have had to stand in a line shaking hands and saying "congratulations" to students in a cap and gown who I know just failed my class and aren't really graduating.  Mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, etc. in the audience do not necessarily know that Johnny did not graduate.  

 

Couldn't you say "Better look next semester"  ?   

[vonfirmath]

"Graduation" is for 12th grade or after. I think that an annual ceremony for grades especially for the senior group of that institute is appropriate and can also be very soothing. But using the word "graduation" is just a little silly, giving the cultural and historic meaning of the word in the US.

 

Is 12th grade the "cultural" graduation in the US? It seems at some point in the not-so-distant history not even every kid went on to high school. They graduated before that point.

[Ellie]

Okay, I must have grown up under a rock, because I didn't "graduate" from preschool, kindergarten or 5th grade.

 

We did have an 8th grade graduation at the Junior High with diplomas, but no caps & gowns. I enjoyed that, and I understood the significance of it to students & families who didn't expect to graduate high school. The kindergarten/elementary stuff seems new to me.

 

Kindergarten "graduation" was not invented until some time in the 90s. My dd went to kindergarten in '80-/81, and although there was some sort of assembly, it was definitely not a "graduation."

 

When I was growing up, no one went to "preschool," and kindergarten was totally optional. I went for about a week, and was asked to leave because I kicked the teacher in the shins. :smash:

 

I never heard of 8th grade graduation until I went to California. Apparently, at least in California, it became a big thing because back in the day so many children didn't attend school after 8th grade, so of course when they finished 8th grade they were graduated.

 

OTOH, where I went to school (mostly on the east coast, with one semester in California, and two years--6th and 7th--in Texas) junior high was 7th, 8th and 9th, so of course there wouldn't have been a graduation for either 7th or 8th.

[KathyBC]

Hahaha, yes going through the fundraising (total slacker here) and what-not for grade 7 grad at our house. DD is super excited. The same kids move a few blocks over from the k-7 elementary school to the gr. 8-12 high school - wow.

[Dmmetler]

There's a picture of me in a paper mortarboard from nursery school. I don't know if we had a formal graduation, or if that was just a craft project of the day, but my mom put it in my high school yearbook! (I assume they contacted parents to do "spirit ads" or something similar, because I wasn't the only kid with a picture of their much younger self immortalized).

 

 

 

 

[happypamama]

I liked the way our school did it. Yearly award ceremony for all grades, and the eighth graders got a special party, more of a big deal than a regular middle school dance. (I think they usually inherited the previous year's prom decorations, and the eighth grade parents used them to create a special party.). Not a graduation. Graduation was for those completing twelfth grade only, in addition to the senior awards ceremony.

 

I think caps and gowns for anything under twelfth grade are silly.

[Sherry in OH]

Is 12th grade the "cultural" graduation in the US? It seems at some point in the not-so-distant history not even every kid went on to high school. They graduated before that point.

 

Eighth grade graduations were common in the late 19^th and early 20^th centuries. It was common for young people to go from eighth grade to full time employment.  Many locations did not have high schools.  Students from those areas who desired more than an eighth grade education would have to board in a town with a high school.  Some went to trade or normal (teaching) schools instead of high school.  

 

Today, a high school diploma, signifying completion of 12^th grade, or a GED is the minimum education level most employers expect.  Unless the student attends a vocational high school, a trade is learned after 12^th grade.  Entry-level education for a teacher is a bachelor’s degree in education.  He or she must earn a master’s within a few years.  

[Southern Ivy]

Kindergarten "graduation" was not invented until some time in the 90s. My dd went to kindergarten in '80-/81, and although there was some sort of assembly, it was definitely not a "graduation."

 

When I was growing up, no one went to "preschool," and kindergarten was totally optional. I went for about a week, and was asked to leave because I kicked the teacher in the shins. :smash:

 

I never heard of 8th grade graduation until I went to California. Apparently, at least in California, it became a big thing because back in the day so many children didn't attend school after 8th grade, so of course when they finished 8th grade they were graduated.

 

OTOH, where I went to school (mostly on the east coast, with one semester in California, and two years--6th and 7th--in Texas) junior high was 7th, 8th and 9th, so of course there wouldn't have been a graduation for either 7th or 8th.

My kindergarten "graduation" was in '86, but they'd been doing it as early as '82. 

[MotherGoose]

I didn't graduate from anything until high school, and managed to live a nice life!

[Spy Car]

 

 

What is up with elementary school graduations?!

 

We had ours yesterday. It was meaningful and really touching. Then last night the kids had a big party at a local restaurant. I was a chaperone. It was special for the kids. They have worked very, very hard and he level of maturity and achievement was most impressive for 5th Graders.

 

Sorry.

 

Bill

[Terabith]

I had a kindergarten graduation in 1982.  I figure, if it's a situation where students are no longer going to be together, then a "graduation" is appropriate.  Otherwise, it's kinda painfully pedantic. 

[MomatHWTK]

I think in general, the longer one homeschools the more likely it is that one's children will have different life experiences than their peers.  It is likely that this will be noticed and commented upon.  IMO, it is best to get used to being different. 

[Halcyon]

so ridiculous. when i graduated 8th, we had NOTHING--I didn't even think about it! Even our high school graduation was pretty low-key. 

 

I can't imagine celebrating a child's transition to 5th, or 6th, or whenever middle school is. (see? I don't even know when middle school starts!  :lol: )

[Halcyon]

OMG I was just reminded of something. When we first moved to Florida, we put my younger in Pre-K for a few days a week while I transitioned. At the end of the year, we made plans to drive up north to visit family. We were told, in somewhat shocked tones, that we would miss the "Pre-K Graduation Ceremony" which would take place a few days after school ended. We laughed and said, "Oh, that's okay, J won't miss it". We thought it was no big deal. We were wrong. The teachers were pretty horrified and actually scheduled a separate graduation ceremony for DS, with all the students wearing caps and gowns (no sh*t, really!) and getting "diplomas" wrapped with ribbons. 

 

We could hardly stifle our laughs, but trust me, they were serious about it.  :huh:

[Bluegoat]

I have no problem with things like end of the year parties or especially events for classes that are leaving the school.  When I was in middle school I was in an enrichment program, and at the end of each year all three grades would have an day of activities and picnic at a park, the grade eights would do a sort of roast of the graduating nines, and the nines would give a gift to each of the teachers.  It was really fun and meaningful.

 

But all the whole making it a ceremony with caps and gowns seems  to be mostly about selling things to me.  These days around here the middle school kids spend as much on graduation dances as the high school ones do.  They all look like they are going to be in tacky weddings.

[deerforest]

I made DD an elementary diploma on the computer and got her a few special gifts for completing 5th grade this year; things she needed anyway but will surprise her. I told her we could go out to eat anywhere of her choosing. She chose a favorite little cafe for lunch. We are celebrating next weekend after her testing next week.

 

It will mean a lot to her that we are doing this.

[AnnE-girl]

We had a kindergarten "graduation" at my Catholic school in 1987. We had cardboard caps and little kid dress clothes, but nothing outrageous. We sang some songs for the parents and grandparents and got little diplomas. Very cute and low key.

We did have eighth grade graduation too, but we had been together as a class since kindergarten and scattering to many different high schools. It was a Mass, awards, and diplomas, but nothing over the top.

 

I read a couple years ago about how more and more families were renting limos for eighth grade graduations in Chicago. The argument was that they weren't guaranteed to have a high school graduation, so families we're going all out earlier. It was kind of sad.

[Farrar]

Kindergarten "graduation" was not invented until some time in the 90s. My dd went to kindergarten in '80-/81, and although there was some sort of assembly, it was definitely not a "graduation."

 

I think you're right on the timing, Ellie. I didn't graduate from *anything* until high school. My younger brother, who is several years behind me and went through most of his schooling in the late 80's and 90's, graduated from *everything* - kindy, elementary school, and middle school.

[Tanaqui]

OMG I was just reminded of something. When we first moved to Florida, we put my younger in Pre-K for a few days a week while I transitioned. At the end of the year, we made plans to drive up north to visit family. We were told, in somewhat shocked tones, that we would miss the "Pre-K Graduation Ceremony" which would take place a few days after school ended. We laughed and said, "Oh, that's okay, J won't miss it". We thought it was no big deal. We were wrong. The teachers were pretty horrified and actually scheduled a separate graduation ceremony for DS, with all the students wearing caps and gowns (no sh*t, really!) and getting "diplomas" wrapped with ribbons. 

 

We could hardly stifle our laughs, but trust me, they were serious about it.  :huh:

 

I know you don't think much about it, but I still think that's really sweet of them!

 

Actually, while I'm agnostic on the subject of elementary and middle school graduations, I'm completely okay with kindy graduations. It's one of the last chances you're going to get to dress your kid up in a ridiculous outfit and take pictures of them in their adorableness before they stop letting you get away with stuff like that.

 

Just so long as the ceremony is short and sweet. Kids march in, sing a song, call their names, time for cake!

 

[TrixieB]

Okay, I must have grown up under a rock, because I didn't "graduate" from preschool, kindergarten or 5th grade.

 

We did have an 8th grade graduation at the Junior High with diplomas, but no caps & gowns. I enjoyed that, and I understood the significance of it to students & families who didn't expect to graduate high school. The kindergarten/elementary stuff seems new to me.

 

We didn't have 8th grade graduation either.  Just 12th grade graduation.

[Chris in VA]

I'm 52, and I still have a picture of me in a cap and gown, graduating from preschool....

 

That said, I don't like graduations before 12th grade.

 

The school where I worked this year has a preK (preschool) graduation with CandG, with silhouettes on the wall. They did a little singing program, and handed out diplomas. *shrug* I guess it was cute. The school owns the apparel, so no cost to the parents. I don't think they needed to do it, though. ITA with the "everyone gets a trophy" comment upthread.

 

Growing up in Northeast OH, the parochial elementaries were K-8, so they had 8th grade graduations. The public schools, like Ellie said, were 10th-12th grade high schools, and 7th-9th grade Jr. High schools. No graduations until 12th.

 

Here, our kids had a graduation in 6th, which is the end of elementary, and went to secondary schools for 7th-12th grades (well, ds homeschooled high school). So--only 12th grade graduations after 6th.

 

My goodness, it's complicated!!

[AHASRADA]

I can't remember if we had a K graduation or not, but K was not part of school back then, it was private and optional. Our system had 1-4 in the elementary school, 5-8th in middle school, 9-12 high school. We did not have an elementary graduation, but did have one for 8th grade. No caps and gowns, though, just a formal awards ceremony with family and photos. Our middle school worked hard to build a culture and emphasize that they were systematically preparing us for the academic rigor of high school, so it was an acknowledgement of our accomplishments and maturation in preparation for the next stage of our academic career. We all moved up to HS together, so we weren't saying goodbye to our classmates, but to our teachers, our school, and that stage of our lives.

 

It was meaningful and appreciated, but I agreed with not using caps and gowns. There were no diplomas awarded, so a "graduation ceremony" would not have been appropriate. So, that's my stance. Whenever a child in a particular school system is changing buildings or academic programs, it is appropriate to have a fairwell/moving-up ceremony of some type. I see no need to call these "graduations" or to wear caps and gowns. I think that minimizes the uniqueness of each event and takes away from the true "graduations".

 

I also don't agree with doing over-the-top grade 8 graduations in case some students drop out of high school. Unlike 100 years ago, 8th grade is not the formal completion of an academic level. There is no 8th grade diploma or certificate. This attitude is telling kids we don't expect much of them, and it's OK for them not to expect to succeed.

[umsami]

I had a 4th grade graduation way back in the 70s when I moved on to Middle School.

 

I don't think we did caps and gowns....just our uniforms and sang some songs for our parents.  It was nice.  I had been sick the last few months of school, so it was nice for me to see my friends.  The lower school was on a different campus than the middle and upper schools.

 

Today is DS1's last day of 5th grade.  His school does not do a 5th grade graduation.  Middle school is the same campus....but many of the elementary schools do.

 

Either way it doesn't bother me.  I think we assume that all parents are supportive and encouraging to their kids.  Not all are.  Sometimes getting this sort of recognition....this sort of celebration....is the only positive things in some kids' lives.  I grew up with friends whose parents would be upset if they got a 90 instead of a 100....if they got a 1400 on the SAT instead of a 1600.   At graduation and ceremonies like it, they could be acknowledged for their good work, even if it didn't add up to Mom and Dad's standards. That would let them see that even though their parents made them feel like they were doomed for a lifetime career at McDonald's because they got a 4 on the Calculus AP exam, they actually did better than most of their class...maybe life wouldn't be so bad.  They got to see that not all parents were like that...and some kids had parents who cheered just as loud for their "c" students as for the honor roll students.  I think that has value too.

[Spy Car]

OMG I was just reminded of something. When we first moved to Florida, we put my younger in Pre-K for a few days a week while I transitioned. At the end of the year, we made plans to drive up north to visit family. We were told, in somewhat shocked tones, that we would miss the "Pre-K Graduation Ceremony" which would take place a few days after school ended. We laughed and said, "Oh, that's okay, J won't miss it". We thought it was no big deal. We were wrong. The teachers were pretty horrified and actually scheduled a separate graduation ceremony for DS, with all the students wearing caps and gowns (no sh*t, really!) and getting "diplomas" wrapped with ribbons. 

 

We could hardly stifle our laughs, but trust me, they were serious about it.  :huh:

 

Why? I know we as a family have spent the past 6 years forming a community with other parents, children, teachers, and school staff. The relationships have been deep and meaningful for both parents and (particularly) the students.

 

The students at our elementary school are scattering to many different schools next year. People you've seen almost every school day for 6 years may be rarely seen in the next years. I think the kids understand this and it is nice to have a way to mark the transition and provide the closure of goodbyes, farewells, and have further bonding opportunities with kids that are taking the same Middle School path.

 

I think having a culminating event affirms human relationships, and honors an important milestone in children's lives and education. I have no doubt the students felt the parental support at the culmination, and we were impressed beyond words at the poise with which they delivered their well-crafted essays. It was an day I won't ever forget.

 

Bill