What would you do? (family priorities)

[StephanieZ]

What would you do if you faced this situation? (No trickery intended, I do mean for this to reflect Palin's situation.)

 

Say, you have 5 kids. . . one young adult is heading off to combat (for the first time) this fall. Another, 17, is single, in highschool, and pregnant. Your newborn infant has Down's. . . Your couple in between are there, too. . .

 

You're offered a "dream job" that requires relocating full time to a distant, almost foreign to your kids, state/city. That dream job requires 24/7 commitment of self, mind, body, etc and requires unimaginable sacrifices of personal space, safety, time, etc. Your kids and family will be under intense scrutiny from this day forward.

 

Do you take it?

 

I mean, I don't even know *any* women who would keep working FT under that scenario (unless absolutely needed financially). Let alone take a new extremely more challenging job.

 

What about "family first"? I am a *so* liberal democrat and I am feeling *so* bizarrely old fashioned to be thinking this, but shouldn't this woman be at home taking care of those kids, at least *some* of the time?????????

[dangermom]

What situation are we talking about? A teenage daughter getting pregnant?

[hsmamainva]

Well....first, I would NEVER want to be in that situation in the first place! I mean, a friend of mine joined the CIA after she left college and they did a background check like you wouldn't BELIEVE!! They interviewed her neighbors, her friends, her employers, her co-workers, people she went to elementary school with.

 

Although I haven't done anything illegal, I wouldn't want folks to be prying into every facet of my life with a microscope.

 

Nor would I want my children put through that. I don't like the media around children anyway. (Every time I see Angelina Jolie's children splashed on the cover of People, I want to scream)

 

But...that's why I don't have any political aspirations. And I wouldn't have wanted my husband to have them either. Nor would I want him to be famous (or infamous! :lol:)

[dangermom]

OK, that is totally bizarre. When I looked earlier, there was only one line in the post. :confused:

 

I'm a very private person, and fame is my idea of hell, so I wouldn't do it. BUT while I think a lot of women would not want this job, I'm also sure that some would be fine with it. After all, these kids also have a dad, and in such a case he would be taking on a lot of family responsibility and possibly quitting any paid job of his own. One would also have a lot of household help--no housecleaning or cooking, and people to bring the tiny kids in for breaks every day.

 

As far as Palin herself is concerned--why don't we ask these questions of men politicians? Most of them have families too, but we don't seem to worry about them much. Mr. Palin seems to be quitting his job to be a full-time at home dad. I don't know anything about how their family works, but if they feel that their family is going to weather this, then it's not really my business. I don't see evidence that Palin is a neglectful or bad mother, so...not my business.

[Nakia]

Would I do it? No way, but I am not Sarah Palin. I believe she is exactly where God put her just like I am where God put me. He is not surprised by any of this.

[Murphy101]

I don't know...

Key questions here are not being asked...

 

What is her dh doing? Is he going to be there to fill for when she is not?

 

"Kid" #1 is going off to combat - her not working as VP isn't going to be doing him any more good than her not doing any other job.

 

"Kid" #2 is going to have a baby, get married, and graduate highschool this year. Again, I fail to see how mom not being VP or any other job would make a difference to that.

 

That leaves 3 children.

 

Kids #3 and #4 will be in home more as Palin intends to use virtual schooling from home for her children. Which means she'll have mroe flexibility to be with her kids than most f/t employeed mothers, including herslef prior to this. I presume Dad and various assistance will be able to help as needed as well.

 

Then there is the baby. Again, I imagine she'll have better and more help than most mothers get with DS infants and certainly more than many mothers employeed F/T can manage. Call me nuts, but I don't picture the VP of our country havng to fight and scrimp to find suitable caregivers or affordable physical therapy around their work schedule for any of their children like the rest of us would.

 

Frankly, being VP just might be the best job she could do for her family situation. There's got to be some perks to living in a fishbowl?

 

Now what would *I* do?

Couldn't pay me enough for that job. Then again, I'm not sure anyone could pay me enough to not be a SAH Hs-ing mom anyways so I might be too biased to be able to say I'd choose to do anything else. But if I genuinely felt it best for my family? THAT would be enough reason for me.

[Parrothead]

 

Do you take it?

 

I mean, I don't even know *any* women who would keep working FT under that scenario (unless absolutely needed financially). Let alone take a new extremely more challenging job.

Yes. If it were me I would.

 

The oldest child is an adult now. There is nothing that my being at home could do to help him. The next oldest is pregnant, but going to get married. Basically this child made her choice to grow up quickly and start her family. It has been done for centuries. This almost legal adult child isn't the first and won't be the last to make that choice. What would I do stay home and run the married child's household for her?

 

The other kids have full-time school, a dad who lives at home and no current job prospects at the new location, and the best security money can buy (secret service). I may not be accessible to them immediately, but I make darn sure that I make time for them daily. Queens have ruled countries under the same circumstances for centuries.

 

The youngest has problems, but so far I've been able to make it work. I'm nursing and the dream job won't start until after he is almost a year old. I'm only planning to nurse for 12 months anyway. (speculation on my part) I've always worked full time with my other 4 kids. (again my speculation) There has only been one brow-raising incident during that time. Many, many other working mother's have successfully raised children with disabilities.

 

I've got the logistics in place, the entire family is okay with the situation. So okay that they are cheering me on. Why not take it?

[Parrothead]

Nor would I want my children put through that. I don't like the media around children anyway. (Every time I see Angelina Jolie's children splashed on the cover of People, I want to scream)

I honestly don't watch much national news anymore. So I have to ask. How often do we (viewing public) see/hear about the children of politicians? Seems to me it is very rare, and only with approval unless the child becomes notorious for some reason.

[bettyandbob]

No, I would not take the job. I do not think a man in this situation should take the job either. She already had a high profile job that would last a couple more years. A pregnant teen does not need more spotlight. A pregnant teen needs family support. Taking the job takes you away from offering strong family support and puts the teen under further stress due to the national spotlight.

 

If a person had already been nominated for VP or President and then found out about the family need, that would be a bit different because the person(man or woman) had already made a committment to the campaign. However, knowing about a difficult situation ahead when a person still quite young enough (40-50 is young in terms of national political position) to further his or her political standing in future years (after this year when the crisis settles), and deciding to accept is something I find pretty awful.

 

I get the opportunity work with teen mothers and teen fathers on occassion. Support from family members is soooo important.

[TXMomof4]

Alright, another little spin here - and I haven't read responses so bear with me

 

Imagine you love America. You feel called to do a job you know could be dangerous, that will take you away from your family, that causes all sorts of emotional stress on you. You love your country and want to be certain that the America we have today (the good parts anyway) are still there for our children and grandchildren. You love the job, but you love your family, What do you do?

 

Well, let me tell you. My dh has a great skill at his job with the Army. He has leadership skills that are put to great use. He has an undying love for his country and we TOGETHER AS A FAMILY have decided that his service to this county is THAT important. Yes, my kids are young, but they are so stinking proud of their father it's almost embarassing sometimes! Every time we see a soldier they want to talk to him and see if he knows their father.

 

We are Christian, so this is something we prayed about, asked others to pray about, meditated on, prayed some more and we came to the conclusion that this sacrifice of time together was in fact what we were intended to do.

 

Just another little different point of view.

[cathmom]

yes, I would take it

[frogpond1]

he will provide for her family. If God gives her the position then he will also take care of her. I don't think we can judge by our own circumstances what she should be doing. I think that people who stand up for what they believe often suffer persecution and the goal in life isn't avoiding persecution. I'd rather do something big in life myself.

[Jenny in Atl]

Nope, I would never take a job that would leave so little time for my family. This includes the position of governor too. If the kids were grown and in college, that might be a different matter.

[Plucky]

No, I wouldn't. But I wouldn't have returned as Biden did when his sons were injured from the car accident that killed their mother. I wouldn't if I were Obama and a man. I. just. wouldn't.

 

I know what I am called to do in my life. I know what my priorities are but I don't believe that my own personal choices would be right for other people or should be foisted on them. Kids are smart. They know when their parents are doing something that is really, really important something that makes a difference more than being their mom.

 

Yeah, mothering is important but it's not the the most important thing in the world no matter how many books people publish about it. I am more than a mother to my children. I am. Right now that is my focus but it won't always be.

 

I'll bet Sarah Palin is making leaders in her own family. Don't think her kids aren't watching and absorbing all this. Her continuing on may make a bigger impact on them and their lives than stepping down. No one really knows.

[6packofun]

Hmmm...just in case this is what you're talking about, I don't believe that the position of vice president is 24/7. The 3 a.m. call isn't going to be answered by Sarah Palin, sorry. LOL

 

The Vice President

The V.P.'s Job: The only duty the U.S. Constitution assigns the vice president is to act as presiding officer of the Senate. But the vice president also serves as ceremonial assistant to the president and is an important part of the president's administration.

 

The Second Highest Office: The vice president is only "a heartbeat away" from becoming the president. He or she must be ready to become president or acting president if anything happens to the president. Thirteen vice presidents have gone on to become president, eight because of the death of a president. (The rest were elected to the office.)

 

*I got that from Scholastic.com but you'll find the same info anywhere else. Every VP has worked in widely varying capacities depending on their individual abilities and what they work out with the president they are serving under. It would be very interesting to compare the schedules and work of Dick Cheney, Al Gore, Dan Quayle, George Bush, etc. etc. And the intense scrutiny is something that Palin's family was already prepared for and willing to deal with while she was governor.

 

I'm sure it was a hard decision and I do understand the hesitation about the possibility of her suddenly becoming president. But VP? Come on. After the election VPs fade into the background and do their thing, with such little coverage usually that the American public really has no idea of what the daily life of a VP is truly like.

[Parrothead]

A pregnant teen does not need more spotlight. A pregnant teen needs family support. Taking the job takes you away from offering strong family support and puts the teen under further stress due to the national spotlight.

 

Help me understand this. I could probably understand a crisis scenario better if the young lady in question is pregnant, no support from the father of the baby, and maybe has one foot out the door on the way to living in the streets.

 

But the young lady is getting married and starting her own family. Yes, the order of things (pregnant first, then married) isn't how it is "supposed" to be done, but very soon she will have a husband.

 

How many of us, when we were newly married, wanted out parents underfoot? To me, that would be so awkward.

 

Do you think the mom of the married daughter should be living with this young couple to offer support?

 

What about the mom of the father, the paternal grandmother?

 

I'm just trying to understand where the crisis is. Maybe me being so independent from my mom at a young age doesn't allow me to see a crisis.

[tibbyl]

Personally I would not do it because I am not the hard-driving ambitious type. But I understand why a woman who finds great fulfillment in a career would do so. Financially set for life. Lasting fame and respect.

[CactusPair]

Personally, I wouldn't take any job unless financially necessary if I had a young child. I want to be with my babies. No job could be bigger than that to me.

 

The older two children would not be a factor in my decision.

 

I cannot say what is right for any other person or family, however. It's up to them.

[FO4UR]

If I felt I was in a position to serve my country in a way not many are able/willing to do, you bet I would! I love my children too much to neglect an opportunity to make a difference in the country in which they live.

 

Men and women sacrifice their personal interests, including family, for our country everyday. SP just has the spotlight today.

[WTMCassandra]

Eliana, this was so profound. I tried to rep you but I have to spread it around.

 

For the OP's question: No, I would not. But then again, I wouldn't run in the first place . . . I would hate a "fishbowl," leadership role of any kind.

 

As for the Palin's situation: We don't know the personalities involved here.

 

How involved is the DH with the children? (Mine, for example, is VERY involved and could easily take on such a role as staying home with them during the VP term.)

 

How much of a team are they, and how much does the DH's ego come into play? (He will have to not be ego-driven for this to work.)

 

How does Palin handle pressure? It seems to me like she is the sort that thrives on it. (I would, on the other hand, dissolve into a puddle with just the son in Iraq, the pregnant daughter, and the special-needs baby. I would probably dissolve with just one of those things to handle!)

 

Food for thought: I have a SIL who leads a very different life from me that I imagine might have the same kind of personality as Sarah. She has three children and has always worked full-time in demanding jobs, and right now she owns her own thriving retail shop. She is a hard-charger. She is kind but emotional stuff/stress just bounces right off and she keeps on trucking. She is a quintessential Type A and loves every minute of it. She has a lot of energy and is very fulfilled. I could see this SIL doing what Sarah is doing and take it all in stride.

 

Me? No way, no how. I do feel sad sometimes at the amount of time SIL's children have spent in daycare, but they seem to have a strong relationship nonetheless. Our family could NEVER survive in their lifestyle, but it's THEIR lifestyle, not ours, and it's OK.

 

I have had very conflicting feelings about the whole situation myself, just like Eliana has expressed.

[nakitty]

My family comes first, period. I made a choice over 10 years ago to start a family with the absolute intent of being the main caregiver to my children. I had dreams and aspirations....and I could have decided that THAT was what I wanted to focus my energies on....but I chose this path. And I did so with the belief that I could do one or the other....but not both. Not well anyhow...and I don't like to do anything half-a**ed.... not anything that's worth doing anyhow. So, as much as I may have wanted my dream job... that ship has sailed, for now. I would have to decline the offer. When my children are grown....I will still have time. We will see....

[Mom to Aly]

Well, I think it is kind of obvious what we would all do, probably--we have all sacrificed whatever careers, etc, we could have had to commit ourselves to our fams, with or without probs. There is nothing that would make me not want to be exactly where I am, homeschooling my daughter. And any probs she might run into would make me even more sure of that.

 

I am an ultra liberal democrat, and don't like McCain, and, although I do like some things about Palin a good bit more--some I don't. Still, I would hope, just as I would not like to be judged by a woman who is running a Fortune 500 company while a nanny takes care of her children most of the time, that I would be above judging Mrs. Palin's choice of what she is doing while raising her family.

[swellmomma]

Given who I am and the sacrifices I make to stay home with my kids no I wouldn't do that. However I know of a few ladies that would, my sister being one of them, out her mat leave is 1 yr, her son is only 8 weeks old and she is already back at work on a contract basis because she prefers working over being home. She is already counting the days until he turns 1 and she can find daycare for him more easily and return to work fulltime. Each person is different, I can totally see her taking her dream job even if it meant being away from her family a lot more, even if it was felt by others that her family needed her. I on the other hand can not bear the thought of even working p/t away from my kids knowing that they need me home with them.

 

Men do it all the time, and now more and more women are striving for a high position in their career. I know my sister says, she is only raising kids for so long, by age 5 they are in school (she is staunchly opposed to hsing) and she will want to be back at work anyhow, why give up 5 or more years(if continued to have children) of senority/experience etc when in 5 years she could be head of the department kwim. She has a point in that regard. I personally could not do it, but I do not fault those who chose the career route over family (though I often wonder why they would, I do not judge them for it).

[Demal]

...and, more importantly perhaps, I feel it is destructive. It keeps us, in my opinion, as a nation, focused on the trivial rather than the essential - the economy, Iraq, Afghanistan, Georgia/Russia, energy/fuel decisions, environmental issues, social justice, taxes, health care... we are leaving these complex, crucial issues aside and focusing on the personal.

 

So true . . . but too late, imo. This candidacy has jumped the shark.

 

http://blogs.abcnews.com/liveblogging/2008/09/how-palin-is-pl.html

 

When I saw the lurid US Weekly cover ("Babies, Lies & Scandal"), I thought it was a spoof. I checked on the magazine website, and nope, it's for real (the magazine cover, that is). This "related story" was funny, though: "Lindsay Lohan Calls Bristol Teen Pregnancy Distracting"

[Mrs Mungo]

Alright, another little spin here - and I haven't read responses so bear with me

 

Imagine you love America. You feel called to do a job you know could be dangerous, that will take you away from your family, that causes all sorts of emotional stress on you. You love your country and want to be certain that the America we have today (the good parts anyway) are still there for our children and grandchildren. You love the job, but you love your family, What do you do?

 

Well, let me tell you. My dh has a great skill at his job with the Army. He has leadership skills that are put to great use. He has an undying love for his country and we TOGETHER AS A FAMILY have decided that his service to this county is THAT important. Yes, my kids are young, but they are so stinking proud of their father it's almost embarassing sometimes! Every time we see a soldier they want to talk to him and see if he knows their father.

 

We are Christian, so this is something we prayed about, asked others to pray about, meditated on, prayed some more and we came to the conclusion that this sacrifice of time together was in fact what we were intended to do.

 

Just another little different point of view.

 

I have to agree. Families make tough decisions like this every day. People make the tough choices and do the hard thing so that other people can do what *they* think is right for their family and don't get called to do those jobs, themselves.

[Frankie]

What would you do if you faced this situation? (No trickery intended, I do mean for this to reflect Palin's situation.)

 

Say, you have 5 kids. . . one young adult is heading off to combat (for the first time) this fall. Another, 17, is single, in highschool, and pregnant. Your newborn infant has Down's. . . Your couple in between are there, too. . .

 

You're offered a "dream job" that requires relocating full time to a distant, almost foreign to your kids, state/city. That dream job requires 24/7 commitment of self, mind, body, etc and requires unimaginable sacrifices of personal space, safety, time, etc. Your kids and family will be under intense scrutiny from this day forward.

 

Do you take it?

 

I mean, I don't even know *any* women who would keep working FT under that scenario (unless absolutely needed financially). Let alone take a new extremely more challenging job.

 

What about "family first"? I am a *so* liberal democrat and I am feeling *so* bizarrely old fashioned to be thinking this, but shouldn't this woman be at home taking care of those kids, at least *some* of the time?????????

 

 

Would I take the job? No, and h-e-double-toothpicks no.

 

My family comes first. Period, end of story.

 

I am a moderate, and I struggled at first with my views on this matter. But I came to my senses: to me, family should always come first. I just do not see how a person could do justice to both her family and her nation, given the circumstances.

[Quiver0f10]

I don't know...

Key questions here are not being asked...

 

What is her dh doing? Is he going to be there to fill for when she is not?

 

"Kid" #1 is going off to combat - her not working as VP isn't going to be doing him any more good than her not doing any other job.

 

"Kid" #2 is going to have a baby, get married, and graduate highschool this year. Again, I fail to see how mom not being VP or any other job would make a difference to that.

 

That leaves 3 children.

 

Kids #3 and #4 will be in home more as Palin intends to use virtual schooling from home for her children. Which means she'll have mroe flexibility to be with her kids than most f/t employeed mothers, including herslef prior to this. I presume Dad and various assistance will be able to help as needed as well.

 

Then there is the baby. Again, I imagine she'll have better and more help than most mothers get with DS infants and certainly more than many mothers employeed F/T can manage. Call me nuts, but I don't picture the VP of our country havng to fight and scrimp to find suitable caregivers or affordable physical therapy around their work schedule for any of their children like the rest of us would.

 

Frankly, being VP just might be the best job she could do for her family situation. There's got to be some perks to living in a fishbowl?

 

Now what would *I* do?

Couldn't pay me enough for that job. Then again, I'm not sure anyone could pay me enough to not be a SAH Hs-ing mom anyways so I might be too biased to be able to say I'd choose to do anything else. But if I genuinely felt it best for my family? THAT would be enough reason for me.

 

:iagree: . Not taking the VP job isn't going to keep her son home or make her DD not pregnant and I don't really see the connection between them.

[Kelli in TN]

What would you do if you faced this situation? (No trickery intended, I do mean for this to reflect Palin's situation.)

 

Say, you have 5 kids. . . one young adult is heading off to combat (for the first time) this fall. Another, 17, is single, in highschool, and pregnant. Your newborn infant has Down's. . . Your couple in between are there, too. . .

 

You're offered a "dream job" that requires relocating full time to a distant, almost foreign to your kids, state/city. That dream job requires 24/7 commitment of self, mind, body, etc and requires unimaginable sacrifices of personal space, safety, time, etc. Your kids and family will be under intense scrutiny from this day forward.

 

Do you take it?

 

I mean, I don't even know *any* women who would keep working FT under that scenario (unless absolutely needed financially). Let alone take a new extremely more challenging job.

 

What about "family first"? I am a *so* liberal democrat and I am feeling *so* bizarrely old fashioned to be thinking this, but shouldn't this woman be at home taking care of those kids, at least *some* of the time?????????

 

First of all, I don't interpret your question as a judgement of Sarah Palin. Am I correct in assuming that you are just making conversation? I see no Mommy Wars here.

 

The answer for me at this point in my life is "NO WAY!". If I start doing too much volunteering I see the damage to my family. A demanding job would just not work for us.

 

And while we don't deal with Downs Syndrome, my youngest does have learning issues and I personally feel that my job is to stay on top of that, it is a full time job in itself.

 

Besides, if I had a full time job I would not have time to come here and spend all day chatting online with babes.;)

[Harriet Vane]

I find this question disturbing. Very disturbing. ...and partly because of my own first reaction - which was to begin typing up a passionate description of my personal convictions about such a choice.

 

The Mommy Wars disturb me more than most of the cultural divides in our country... most of the decisions we make as mothers are neither simple nor binary, and I feel it is very difficult to fairly judge the choices another person is making about work vs family. And I am completely baffled as to how anyone benefits when we do so.

 

The path dh and I chose in life wasn't chosen lightly, and we are firmly convinced that our family-centered choices - including homebirth, "attachment parenting", extended nursing, co-sleeping, homeschool, and (for many years) dh working from home were the right ones *for our family*. But they came with a price tag - sometimes a very literal one! - and I do not feel qualified to judge if someone else should be prepared to pay that price.

 

I believe that we each have a purpose to fulfill in our lives, gifts to offer to the world, responsibilities to discover and fulfill... and that our life circumstances, our temperaments, and our backgrounds are part of how we find the path best suited to who we are and what we can be.

 

Yes, I put my husband, my children, my immediate community first (and in that order), but some might say (with justification) that that is selfish and short sighted of me. Are we as parents just here to help our children grow up to focus on their immediate family needs? Or do we have a larger responsibility? And if so, how much should we sacrifice of the immediate, of the personal, to the larger cause (whatever that cause might be)?

 

There are many people who have made incredible contributions to the world... and done it at the expense (to a greater or lesser extent) of their children's happiness and well being... both on the big scale and the little.... should every soldier who is a parent resign because that would be better for the kids? Where do we draw the line?

 

Imnsho, there is no one "line", finding that line is part of the struggle each of us must go through individually (or as couples, or with the guidance of our religious/spiritual/moral traditions/beliefs).

 

And I cannot believe that how Edwards or Palin or Biden or Obama or Bush or Carter or Clinton (either one) makes those decisions will/has in any way impacted his/her effectiveness (or lack thereof) or readiness (or lack thereof) to serve as President or Vice President of our country.

 

We can with clear consciences debate the validity of Palin's claim to be a reformer, the relative merits of national legislative service vs local "executive" experience, what constitutes "readiness" for these offices, bills any or all of them have voted on, etc... but how they configure their family lives, how they handle crises which are purely personal, and what kind pf parent they are or aren't is, in my opinion, really out of bounds.

 

...and, more importantly perhaps, I feel it is destructive. It keeps us, in my opinion, as a nation, focused on the trivial rather than the essential - the economy, Iraq, Afghanistan, Georgia/Russia, energy/fuel decisions, environmental issues, social justice, taxes, health care... we are leaving these complex, crucial issues aside and focusing on the personal. I do it too, far more often than I would like to admit, even to myself.

 

 

:iagree:

[Bess]

No I wouldn't take the job most certainly. Look at my new post linking Voddie's blog about the matter. I think he said it well.

[Soph the vet]

If my dh were willing to stay home and take over the schoolroom, I would take the job in a heartbeat. And I am pretty conservative morally, socially, and fiscally. I have threatened my dh on a regular basis with "I'm going to run for office when the kids are gone!" For now, I will live vicariously through Sarah Palin as I respect all she brings to the ticket. Maybe it is my reformer's heart and desire to see Washington shaken up and trimmed down.

A related quote from Palin that I thought was so fitting when asked how she does it all (i.e. governing, parenting, etc.) "I just put down the blackberry and pick up the breastpump":lol:. That's my kinda girl!!

[Academy of Jedi Arts]

It depends- if I had the kind of education and experience that really prepared me for the job, and knew fully what I was getting myself into and knew I could do it, I would probably take it. However, if I wasn't even sure what someone in the position did all day- there is no way.

 

I have to say that I really applaud my working mom friends. The career I had before I had dd was very stressful and demanding, and I do not think I could have given dd what she needed and given 100% to my job too. But there are women out there who can, and I admire them so very very much. My MIL was a working mom also, at a time when many more women stayed at home, and she did such a great job with her boys.

[Marie in Oh]

based on the traditional values set out in the Bible for women, what about Deborah? Is she a hypocrite because she claims to follow God yet appears to shirk her traditional role? I've seen as much said here and elsewhere by people from every end of the political spectrum.

 

Judges 4:4-5

 

Deborah, a prophetess, the wife of Lappidoth, was leading Isreal at that time. She held court under the Palm of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in the hill country of Ephraim, and the Israelites came to her to have their desputes settled.

 

The chapter continues to tell how she sent Barak to battle, who said he'd only go if she would go with him.

 

The commentary in my Bible has this to say about Deborah:

 

Deborah literally means wasp and her story reveal that she was willing to sting if need be, even leading an army to war if the Lord led. She was uncompromising in her zeal for the Lord, singing "So may all your enemies perish, O Lord, But may they who love your be like the sun when it rises in its strength." This godly woman could be prickley, but she also blessed those who followed the Lord. (words attributed to Penny Pierce Rose)

 

I think that we are awfully quick to judge as Eliana and others have said. We have no idea where Sarah Palin fits in to God's plan on the national level. But really, is it our place to say we would take the job if offered? We are not her. We do not have the same purpose. God's plan for our lives is different than hers. Clearly God used Godly women in the Old Testament to bring about His purposes. Do we know if Deborah had children, what her circumstances were, etc? No we do not. But clearly God blessed her and called her to rise up among her nation to lead. If that is His will for Sarah Palin, then so be it.

[SheilaZ]

I would in a heartbeat. Especially if DH would be around and not in the military anymore.

 

People say similar things about me. "I just don't know how you do it all." Many times it's not said in a positive tone.

You'd be amazed what a motivated person is capable of doing when they put their mind to it. I do a lot of "extra" stuff outside the home. I do it because a. it helps my kids or b. I want to do it.

 

I'm sure Gov Palin can take care of three young children with her husband's full time help (and more resources than I will ever see) while overseeing the senate and filling in for the POTUS every now and then. Heck that might even be a vaction for her.

[Kimber]

After taking a step back from this, I think that the definitions of liberals and conservatives is totally inaccurate. :D

 

As a conservative christian woman, not a republican by default but a pro-lifer :D, I think all of the drama about Palin is simply because she's a woman. And it is unfair to her and to ourselves.

 

Every mother has drama in her life, because all children screw up. It's a fact of life and it's not an indication of a problem.

 

In fact it's this kind of speculation about her choices and her values that is going to put her in the white house. That and the media frenzy about her "place". Once enough women wake up to what is going on, she and McCain will be voted in.

 

It's totally unfair that she's being judged solely by the actions of her family. And that she is being blamed for those actions. No male politician has to suffer through this kind of guilt and abuse, even if his wife and children have just been killed in a car accident as in Biden's situation. Or let's look at Edwards, his wife has cancer and he kept running, or how about Mitt Romney? No one questioned his values and his wife has an illness (I forget what, maybe MS?) and 5 sons that she had been left with all alone to take care of while he ran for office. Why wasn't that drama?

 

And I am amazed, truly amazed, that so many in modern society feel this way about her. No wonder psychiatrists are making a ton of money while people figure out it was all their mother's fault.

 

And I am about as conservative as they come. But I just don't see how when a woman becomes a mother, she's more important than a father or is needed to hold her children's hands past nursing. Once they're out of the womb and no longer nursing, parenting is 50/50 either parent can be the primary care giver.

 

Where are the feminists when you need them?

[Academy of Jedi Arts]

Where are the feminists when you need them?

 

A lot of them would be there more vocally if Palin didn't want to set us back in terms of our rights and the rights of our daughters - even taking the overturning Roe V Wade stance completely out of the equation. And I do hear a lot of women saying how her family should not matter in this election. I agree with that too.

 

All I can say is what *I* would do in her shoes, but I can not make decisions for her, nor would I want to judge her personal decisions that only effect herself and her family.

 

A LOT of people discussed Edwards and his sick wife, especially here in NC. It was all over, from all sides.

 

Great post though, even if I disagree with some of it. :)

[Robin Hood]

I don't know...

Key questions here are not being asked...

 

What is her dh doing? Is he going to be there to fill for when she is not?

 

"Kid" #1 is going off to combat - her not working as VP isn't going to be doing him any more good than her not doing any other job.

 

"Kid" #2 is going to have a baby, get married, and graduate highschool this year. Again, I fail to see how mom not being VP or any other job would make a difference to that.

 

That leaves 3 children.

 

Kids #3 and #4 will be in home more as Palin intends to use virtual schooling from home for her children. Which means she'll have mroe flexibility to be with her kids than most f/t employeed mothers, including herslef prior to this. I presume Dad and various assistance will be able to help as needed as well.

 

Then there is the baby. Again, I imagine she'll have better and more help than most mothers get with DS infants and certainly more than many mothers employeed F/T can manage. Call me nuts, but I don't picture the VP of our country havng to fight and scrimp to find suitable caregivers or affordable physical therapy around their work schedule for any of their children like the rest of us would.

 

Frankly, being VP just might be the best job she could do for her family situation. There's got to be some perks to living in a fishbowl?

 

Now what would *I* do?

Couldn't pay me enough for that job. Then again, I'm not sure anyone could pay me enough to not be a SAH Hs-ing mom anyways so I might be too biased to be able to say I'd choose to do anything else. But if I genuinely felt it best for my family? THAT would be enough reason for me.

 

I agree and frankly, I can't see anybody on this board as VP. Sarah is of a different mind set and I think it' unfair to compare her to ourselves and our way of thinking, even as diverse as we are.

[Academy of Jedi Arts]

I agree and frankly, I can't see anybody on this board as VP. Sarah is of a different mind set and I think it' unfair to compare her to ourselves and our way of thinking, even as diverse as we are.

 

Whoah whoah whoah......there are women on this board that have a LOT more education than she does. There are also a lot of women on this board who have political experience, or executive business experience.

 

I would love to know why you think she is of a "different mindset" than any of the women on this board.

[Nestof3]

Well, I cannot really answer that because with 5 kids, I would not be working unless we could not make it otherwise. I would be homeschooling my kids if I could. After God, my first responsibility is to my family, and since I do not have to work, I am free to devote my time to my kids and be the gatekeeper of my home.

[Tracey in TX]

What an intriguing question. It would be so tempting to take the dream job, something I worked toward and desired for a long time. But I wouldn't do it. I changed my major from broadcast journalism to education when I found my values changing toward career first, family second. It was a career I had longed for and was well equipped to do. But my heart and head weren't in the same place.

I hold no other woman to my standards. We're not all wired the same. Some people must continue to work for monetary reasons. Others need to work to keep their sanity. I would have felt like a personal failure if I abandoned my children for a job. I am not very good at balance and it would've been abandonment, not just taking a job. All or none for me. (Trying to clarify that I don't see working women as abandoning their children.)

I do respect Sarah Palin for making her choice. She must have a strong marriage, as does any elected official, whose family will primarily be raised by the spouse. She's clearly a woman with energy, ambition and courage. Hopefully her family has the same strength.

[TXMomof4]

People say similar things about me. "I just don't know how you do it all." Many times it's not said in a positive tone.

You'd be amazed what a motivated person is capable of doing when they put their mind to it. I do a lot of "extra" stuff outside the home. I do it because a. it helps my kids or b. I want to do it.

 

 

 

Exactly. We do what we have to do. In service to our God and our country. That sounds trite, but it's true.

[Amy in NH]

Well, I consider myself to be a liberal person in many ways (pro-choice, pro-gay union, etc.), but I'm also quite conservative in other ways (esp child rearing, etc.). For myself, I believe that since I chose to bring children into this world I should do my best to raise them myself. For me, that means not sending them off to state-sponsored daycare so that I can pursue my dream job. I DO have personal educational and career goals and ambitions. I'm chomping at the bit to pursue them. But I will not pursue my own goals if it means compromising what I consider to be my main responsibility - to my children; I will not shift my focus onto those personal goals until they are grown and gone. As much as I cringe & wince & gnash my teeth, my self-imposed responsibility to them means that I have to turn down opportunities until then.

 

So, to answer the question of the OP, I would not be accept a nomination to become the VP in a far off land, or probably even the governor of my own state while I have young children, particularly ones with special needs. Which is just fine, 'cuz I'm sure I won't be asked. :D

[TXMomof4]

 

 

It's totally unfair that she's being judged solely by the actions of her family. And that she is being blamed for those actions. No male politician has to suffer through this kind of guilt and abuse, even if his wife and children have just been killed in a car accident as in Biden's situation. Or let's look at Edwards, his wife has cancer and he kept running, or how about Mitt Romney? No one questioned his values and his wife has an illness (I forget what, maybe MS?) and 5 sons that she had been left with all alone to take care of while he ran for office. Why wasn't that drama?

 

And I am amazed, truly amazed, that so many in modern society feel this way about her. No wonder psychiatrists are making a ton of money while people figure out it was all their mother's fault.

 

And I am about as conservative as they come. But I just don't see how when a woman becomes a mother, she's more important than a father or is eeded to hold her children's hands past nursing. Once they're out of the womb and no longer nursing, parenting is 50/50 either parent can be the primary care giver.

 

Where are the feminists when you need them?

 

I'm amazed at how everyone is reacting to a girl that screwed up also. Remember the Bush twins....wasn't it drinking for them?

 

Gore's son - wasn't there something about drinking or drug use?

 

Cheney's daughter - (not that she's a screw up- but outside the accepted "conservative Christian" norm)

 

These are people who have made decisions. Probably would have made the same decisions if their parents were in the spotlight or not. Isn't it Depeche Mode that says- People are people?

[Mekanamom]

What I would do, personally, has nothing to do with my support for another person doing it. Different people are suited to different lifestyles. And that's how I believe it should be.

 

I don't think that what I do (or would do) is what everyone else should do... I mean, most of us homeschoolers can relate to making choices that go against the majority, right?

 

I see nothing wrong with Palin going for it. :)

[dangermom]

I do have to say that I have been stunned at the amount of sheer misogyny I've seen aimed at Palin from the left--not here on WTM but in the media and in blogs etc. (FTR, I'm a moderate, registered Dem.) "Dingy housewife" is one of the nicest things I've seen said about her. I'm appalled at some of the reaction. I thought liberals were supposed to be against sexism...

[Heather in Neverland]

In a hot minute.

 

We're not talking about her becoming district manager for Wal-Mart (not that there is anything wrong with that). She might be the VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES for pete's sake...and the first woman to boot.

 

If I were one of her kids I'd say GO FOR IT MOM and walk around with a grin so big you could see it for miles. What an awesome experience...what an amazing adventure...what a story their family will have to tell!

 

I, personally, do not worship at the alter of my offspring. Yes, they are my number one priority but I do not think it is necessary to hover about them 24/7 in order to be a good mom. Everyone is ASSUMING she will have no time for them just like they are assuming that McCain will die in office and she'll have to take over.

 

I, for one, am jealous of this amazing opportunity for her whole family!

[Robin Hood]

Whoah whoah whoah......there are women on this board that have a LOT more education than she does. There are also a lot of women on this board who have political experience, or executive business experience.

 

I would love to know why you think she is of a "different mindset" than any of the women on this board.

 

I only know of one of us who ran for governor. If you can do it, go for it. Palin did. That's what makes her mind set different. It's not her intelligence, experience or business. She has the guts to do it. Her family will survive.

[Alice]

I wouldn't run for VP in this situation (which is really what the question is, not just any dream job) but then I wouldn't ever run for VP. I would never want the amount of public scrutiny or repsonsiblity that comes with this job. It wouldn't be my dream job it would be a nightmare. So, it's hard for me to imagine how she is feeling now with a baby and a pregnant daughter and three other kids....because I wouldn't have wanted the same career in the first place.

 

Now...would I want my dream job, whatever that would be in this same family setting? Maybe....I think being a responsible adult does mean postponing my own dreams and desires in order to be the best Mom I can be. I purposefully ruled out certain career options within medicine for this reason.

 

BUT if I had a supportive husband who was a great Dad and who would provide that primary role for my kids? If my family supported my decision to take this job that is a once in a lifetime chance? If I thought that my kids would benefit from this in ways that would make up for the public scrutiny and other harm? If I thought that God had given me certain gifts and talents and this job was an opportunity to use those? If I felt that this job was a calling? Again, yes, ,maybe. I do think fathers can be just as good at being a primary caregiver. I am also a conservative Christian and believe in men being the head of the household, but I guess I think a man can do that as a SAHD. I would hope that if I was in this situation my husband and I would have prayed together and asked God for guidance. I would hope that we would then have thick enough skin to be confident in our decision admist all the people telling us we were wrong.

 

ETA: When I re-read this I thought it sounded like I was implying that I don't now have a supportive husband. Actually, I have an amazing dh that does stay home part-time with our kids and plans to take on part of the homeschooling role. He has postponed his own career advancement in order for us to both be able to work part-time and still have our kids be only with one of us. Probaly noone else cares about this edit...but it makes me feel better knowing I didn't give the wrong impression of him. :)