DawnM Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Seriously? We have to have a gender reveal party Then a baby shower Then a baby naming ceremony party Any more I am forgetting? Sheesh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Meet the baby party Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 A friend went to a gender reveal party last week and said they brought gifts! I asked about the gifts since they didn't know the gender, and she said the registry had all gender neutral stuff. So I suspect the parents actually returned this stuff and bought stuff for a boy/girl, huh? They will be having a shower also. I like babies, but I don't need to be invited to three parties for every baby. Nope. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tangerine Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I have secular friends who have done naming ceremonies in lieu of christenings or dedications. They were lovely. But I get your point. I think gender revelation is silly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I went to a gender reveal party, and it was a blast. The hostess (mom to be's sister) requested no gifts, but a small package of diapers if we could. That wasn't expensive and as I know the financial situation of the mom to be I know it will be a great help to her. Tons of food and drink provided by the hostess, lots of fun people, and lots of joy. The mom to be had been suffering from infertility for years, so this was a hugely emotional thing for her. I personally wouldn't do a gender reveal party, but her big italian family never misses a chance for a party, any party, so I wasn't surprised. And it was so fun to see her and her husband find out what the baby was going to be. And yes, I will go to the baby shower, and although I have no idea what a "baby naming ceremony is, if it is a christening/baptism yes, I very much hope to be invited to that as well. I pray that I will never be so jaded about new life as to be upset or offended by a chance to celebrate it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Yeah, I feel like that is going a bit overboard with the celebrations. One celebration per baby seems about right to me. Of course people who are inclined to give more gifts are always welcome to, right? I find the gender reveal to be an interesting phenomenon. It's just a change that's happened in my lifetime, since I'm pretty sure when I was born and for many years after, the gender was revealed at the birth. I guess I don't see the need for a separate party for it. On the other hand, as our culture values children less and less, maybe more celebrations are better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshine72 Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I pray that I will never be so jaded about new life as to be upset or offended by a chance to celebrate it. Oh please, buying gifts doesn't do anything to celebrate a new life. People aren't getting sick of babies being born, just the blatant gift grabs. Like the invite I got for my neighbors grandsons girlfriends shower. She didn't care that I was there as I only met her a few times, I was just another potential gift to them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Oh please, buying gifts doesn't do anything to celebrate a new life. People aren't getting sick of babies being born, just the blatant gift grabs. Like the invite I got for my neighbors grandsons girlfriends shower. She didn't care that I was there as I only met her a few times, I was just another potential gift to them. Sorry you experienced that, I guess. I mean, i doubt they had a kid just to get gifts, and I doubt the gifts were for them, but for their baby, I don't know, I've just never known people that were just trying to get gifts, so I don't understand. Baby shower? That's normal and accepted. Baptism/Christening? Also normal and accepted. Gender reveal? new, not my thing, but again, I've never known people to ask for presents for them. I've only been invited to two, but both times presents were not the point. Fun celebrating a new child was the point. I suppose I could be cynical and look at my friend's gender reveal party as a "diaper grab", but seriously, no. It was a chance to celebrate the baby she had waited so long to conceive, and honestly, an excuse for a party, which her big italian family loves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G5052 Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Yes, I have to admit that I've been amazed at all of these parties too. Friends gave us a baby showers for ours about a month before they were due, and that was that. A family friend is pregnant now, and she announced that her SIL would hold a shower after the baby is born because they don't know the sex, and to please not organize anything else. She didn't want scads of events, please. But weddings are the same. When I was growing up, you had one bridal shower, a rehearsal dinner, and a wedding. Where I live now, some people have an engagement party, a bridesmaid's lunch, multiple showers (maybe for both parties or joint), bachelor/bachelorette parties, a rehearsal dinner, a wedding, and a post-wedding brunch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I went to a gender reveal party, and it was a blast. The hostess (mom to be's sister) requested no gifts, but a small package of diapers if we could. That wasn't expensive and as I know the financial situation of the mom to be I know it will be a great help to her. Tons of food and drink provided by the hostess, lots of fun people, and lots of joy. The mom to be had been suffering from infertility for years, so this was a hugely emotional thing for her. I personally wouldn't do a gender reveal party, but her big italian family never misses a chance for a party, any party, so I wasn't surprised. And it was so fun to see her and her husband find out what the baby was going to be. And yes, I will go to the baby shower, and although I have no idea what a "baby naming ceremony is, if it is a christening/baptism yes, I very much hope to be invited to that as well. I pray that I will never be so jaded about new life as to be upset or offended by a chance to celebrate it. I don't consider myself jaded about new life. I love growing families. I just think three gift giving parties for one child is a bit excessive since in our circles they invite the same people to each party. (Which is different than three baby showers- one for work friends, one for his side of the family, one for hers) And you did in fact bring a gift- the diapers are a gift. The party you went to sounds lovely, and the mom has been through a lot to get this baby here. Some gender reveal parties are when the parents find out the gender, too. In the case I mentioned, the parents knew. But the parents of the mom-to-be were to find out the gender at the same time as the casual friends who attended. That kind of bugged me...it's always been dd's pleasure to call us personally to tell us the gender before it was on Facebook or publicly announced. But not everyone is an introvert and others may LOVE to find out all at the same time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I don't consider myself jaded about new life. I love growing families. I just think three gift giving parties for one child is a bit excessive since in our circles they invite the same people to each party. (Which is different than three baby showers- one for work friends, one for his side of the family, one for hers) And you did in fact bring a gift- the diapers are a gift. The party you went to sounds lovely, and the mom has been through a lot to get this baby here. Some gender reveal parties are when the parents find out the gender, too. In the case I mentioned, the parents knew. But the parents of the mom-to-be were to find out the gender at the same time as the casual friends who attended. That kind of bugged me...it's always been dd's pleasure to call us personally to tell us the gender before it was on Facebook or publicly announced. But not everyone is an introvert and others may LOVE to find out all at the same time. I don't think a package of diapers is excessive or gift grabbing. I think it may even have said, 'if able" on the invitation, I don't remember. I know I would have been welcome if I'd forgotten or been unable to bring the diapers. I don't think a $7 package of diapers was a financial strain for anyone invited, either. I could be wrong. As for the third party mentioned, that's the baptism/christening am I right? Do people also resent that? We've always just held a brunch at the house for the extended family, God parents, and whomever else was interested in attending. Gifts definitely not required, and usually only given by my mom and sister...sometimes the God parents, but only once out of three kids. Not a gift grab. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 With dd1 we had a baby shower in GA before she was born and a meet the baby shower in MI when we came up for Christmas. With dd2 we had a meet the baby shower at my Aunt Kate's house when my mom came down and that's it :) dd1 was born at the end of November and dd2 at the end of January so Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wintermom Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 What do these "Gender party people" say when asked the typical question about the baby's gender, "All will be revealed at the party. If you want to know you have to come." :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Any more I am forgetting? A gender reveal photography session where the couple squirts pink or blue paint all over each other. (I swear I'm not making that up—I saw photos on Pinterest.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 What do these "Gender party people" say when asked the typical question about the baby's gender, "All will be revealed at the party. If you want to know you have to come." :laugh: They say, 'we don't know yet." I imagine. As they don't know. (I've never been to, or heard of, one where the family already knew the gender. The one's I know about the family is finding out the gender along with the guests) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 So we are really missing out on community ceremonies in this country. There is no particular norm. So people are inventing occasions because we yearn for them, even thought we don't have a cultural consensus about them anymore. It's an interesting progression, kind of similar in my mind to the move toward liturgy and the church year among non-denominationals. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 A gender reveal photography session where the couple squirts pink or blue paint all over each other. (I swear I'm not making that up—I saw photos on Pinterest.) :huh: Ok, I suppose different people celebrate in different ways, but . . . paint . . . :huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajfries Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I've never known anyone to have ALL of those parties for a single baby. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brilliant Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 :huh: Ok, I suppose different people celebrate in different ways, but . . . paint . . . :huh: Not as bad as trashing the wedding dress, at least! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 So we are really missing out on community ceremonies in this country. There is no particular norm. So people are inventing occasions because we yearn for them, even thought we don't have a cultural consensus about them anymore. It's an interesting progression, kind of similar in my mind to the move toward liturgy and the church year among non-denominationals. That's definitely possible. I suspect at least some of it is spurred by seeing ideas on Pinterest and elsewhere and feeling like you'll be missing out on something fun and important if you don't do this, and that, and that. And that's such a cute idea! Oh, and that looks cool too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Not as bad as trashing the wedding dress, at least! I cannot tell you how much I hate this trend. I can't even figure out WHY it bothers me so much- it's not like I paid for the dress or anything. It just feels so...mean. It's my dress and I'm not going to use it again but I sure don't want anyone else to use it so I'm going to destroy it. I'm too frugal to enjoy this kind of activity....but still, it's their dress so they can trash it if they like. I wonder if they will regret such wastefulness when they are in their 50's and are paying college tuition and trying to save enough for retirement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted June 16, 2014 Author Share Posted June 16, 2014 Gracious. I have only seen the cake frosting in the middle when cut type of thing, like the Duggar's did. Honestly, I don't care nearly as much about your baby's gender as you do, so the "surprise" element is a little lost on me. Same with the name. I really don't care what you are naming your little Mabel or Milburn, so telling me is a "surprise" doesn't hold any excitement. I was just trying to be polite. Dawn A gender reveal photography session where the couple squirts pink or blue paint all over each other. (I swear I'm not making that up—I saw photos on Pinterest.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Just don't go if it doesn't interest you. That's totally your decision. IME, people here are a lot crankier about it than people IRL. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Gracious. I have only seen the cake frosting in the middle when cut type of thing, like the Duggar's did. Honestly, I don't care nearly as much about your baby's gender as you do, so the "surprise" element is a little lost on me. Same with the name. I really don't care what you are naming your little Mabel or Milburn, so telling me is a "surprise" doesn't hold any excitement. I was just trying to be polite. Dawn So I guess you wouldn't be inclined to come to the party dressed in the color of what you guess the gender to be, right? Yeah, we've had those invites. I do not care to guess...and I really don't care to dress in pink or blue to show my guess. I also will not be choosing between drinking pink or blue punch to show my guess (I choose pink lemonade because blue food is not appealing at all). I will try to look happy when the announcement is finally made, because they will post pictures on Facebook and I learned I don't want to be the one looking bored. A friend's daughter had a gender reveal and everyone in the 'at the moment of reveal' pics looked bored except the parents and grandparents( who already knew before the party what the gender was). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I don't think a package of diapers is excessive or gift grabbing. I think it may even have said, 'if able" on the invitation, I don't remember. I know I would have been welcome if I'd forgotten or been unable to bring the diapers. I don't think a $7 package of diapers was a financial strain for anyone invited, either. I could be wrong. As for the third party mentioned, that's the baptism/christening am I right? Do people also resent that? We've always just held a brunch at the house for the extended family, God parents, and whomever else was interested in attending. Gifts definitely not required, and usually only given by my mom and sister...sometimes the God parents, but only once out of three kids. Not a gift grab. This might be better for a spin-off, but I know I am starting to feel burned out with the expectation that I have to take something whenever I am invited somewhere. I get it that showers are for gifts, of course. But it feels like every invitation carries an obligation to bring something: food for a potluck, a gift for the housewarming, graduation, gender reveal, baptism... or even just a hostess gift if someone invites me to dinner and tells me to come empty-handed. I no longer feel I can go empty-handed, because when I tell people to come empty-handed, they still don't! There is a cultural expectation here that there is a "cost" involved in being a guest. Even the invitation stating "if able..." - to me that's meaningless; no one is going to come without the diapers. I realize I sound cranky and ungenerous but really, once in a while it would be nice to be invited to something with zero expectation of having to bring a gift or food contribution of some sort. And as far as it being a financial strain... sure, for each individual party $7 is not much. But they add up. By the way, I do enjoy potlucks, and I sometimes have them myself. But not every time. I truly would like to be a hostess sometimes and have people just show up with nothing but an appetite and some conversation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 So I guess you wouldn't be inclined to come to the party dressed in the color of what you guess the gender to be, right? Yeah, we've had those invites. I do not care to guess...and I really don't care to dress in pink or blue to show my guess. I also will not be choosing between drinking pink or blue punch to show my guess (I choose pink lemonade because blue food is not appealing at all). I will try to look happy when the announcement is finally made, because they will post pictures on Facebook and I learned I don't want to be the one looking bored. A friend's daughter had a gender reveal and everyone in the 'at the moment of reveal' pics looked bored except the parents and grandparents( who already knew before the party what the gender was). I'm trying to figure out why you went to this party, if you hated it so much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicMom Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 We had a gender reveal for my daughter, but it was to tell the grandparents, aunts and uncles and great grandparents. My parents have a large amount of grandchildren and will continue to add, so it was mostly just a unique way to tell my mom. We didn't invite anyone but immediate family and didn't request or get any presents. We did have some close family friends invite themselves though, which was fine. Honestly though, we are a large family who celebrates EVERYTHING together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 This might be better for a spin-off, but I know I am starting to feel burned out with the expectation that I have to take something whenever I am invited somewhere. I get it that showers are for gifts, of course. But it feels like every invitation carries an obligation to bring something: food for a potluck, a gift for the housewarming, graduation, gender reveal, baptism... or even just a hostess gift if someone invites me to dinner and tells me to come empty-handed. I no longer feel I can go empty-handed, because when I tell people to come empty-handed, they still don't! There is a cultural expectation here that there is a "cost" involved in being a guest. Even the invitation stating "if able..." - to me that's meaningless; no one is going to come without the diapers. I realize I sound cranky and ungenerous but really, once in a while it would be nice to be invited to something with zero expectation of having to bring a gift or food contribution of some sort. And as far as it being a financial strain... sure, for each individual party $7 is not much. But they add up. By the way, I do enjoy potlucks, and I sometimes have them myself. But not every time. I truly would like to be a hostess sometimes and have people just show up with nothing but an appetite and some conversation. Invitations, parties, and gift-giving, hosting and being a guest, are all social actions with an element of reciprocity to them. Being one sided in reciprocal interactions creates an implicit imbalance in social relationships. Power is in the hands of the giver/host. When people take turns hosting, there's reciprocity. When people give gifts upon being invited (including food to a potluck) there is reciprocity. It's not necessarily about actual expenditure, it can be symbolic. But it's important, part of the social glue. Finding new ways to keep our communities glued together is important. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Invitations, parties, and gift-giving, hosting and being a guest, are all social actions with an element of reciprocity to them. Being one sided in reciprocal interactions creates an implicit imbalance in social relationships. Power is in the hands of the giver/host. When people take turns hosting, there's reciprocity. When people give gifts upon being invited (including food to a potluck) there is reciprocity. It's not necessarily about actual expenditure, it can be symbolic. But it's important, part of the social glue. Finding new ways to keep our communities glued together is important. The idea of a hostess gift isn't new...people have been doing that forever. A bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine, a loaf of bread, a cake, whatever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shawthorne44 Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I was thrown a baby shower for DD. We also did a Meet the Baby party, and the word was spread No Gifts. The Meet the Baby was at my parents and mainly for their friends. They had given up on having a baby (I was 40) so it was really a "Show off our granddaughter" party. A gender-reveal just seems silly. If you plan on revealing that, couldn't you do that at or before the baby shower? I think the real problem is expectation of gifts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I'm trying to figure out why you went to this party, if you hated it so much. I'm an introvert so I don't enjoy very many large scale social gatherings. You're reading too much into this, though. Some of us are just snarking the trend of overdoing things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 They even had a registry?! They had baby registries at several stores- to cover all the baby parties, not a specific gender reveal party registry. But the 'registered at Target, ToysRUs, etc.' line was included in the invitation to the gender reveal party. I know it's tacky to put that in invitations, but that's how I know it's a gift giving occasion. I would have never known to bring a gift to a reveal party. Or an 'after the wedding' brunch. When we were young, engagement parties weren't gift giving events in our circle of friends. It was just usually a cookout to celebrate. I'm getting very old.g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Just don't go if it doesn't interest you. That's totally your decision. IME, people here are a lot crankier about it than people IRL. It might come across like that, but IRL I have to go to one of these things that I'm secretly rolling my eyes at b/c I have to out of obligation. I don't agree with what the family has done in regards to the multiple parties pre and post baby. Since I can vent about it here, I do :D I can't seem to copy/paste in this reply window, but about the comment about not being so jaded about new life to be upset about celebrating it.. I don't see it like that. I am thrilled about the new baby! I compare it to getting a medal just for showing up. I think it is overdoing it to have more than one (maybe 2 if you have lots of circles) party. Maybe it's about the gifts... I don't know. Maybe the next trend will be having multiple birthday parties for a 4 year old... celebrating life! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrairieSong Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 We have seven kids and I had one baby shower total. I had never heard of gender revealing parties until the last few years and the only kind of "meet the baby" parties I've heard of are just showers held after the baby's birth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggie96 Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Don't forget the Grandmother's Baby Shower that is growing in popularity. A family-member of mine recently had all the parties mentioned above for their first child, complete with a Grandmother baby shower. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Yes, I have to admit that I've been amazed at all of these parties too. Friends gave us a baby showers for ours about a month before they were due, and that was that. A family friend is pregnant now, and she announced that her SIL would hold a shower after the baby is born because they don't know the sex, and to please not organize anything else. She didn't want scads of events, please. But weddings are the same. When I was growing up, you had one bridal shower, a rehearsal dinner, and a wedding. Where I live now, some people have an engagement party, a bridesmaid's lunch, multiple showers (maybe for both parties or joint), bachelor/bachelorette parties, a rehearsal dinner, a wedding, and a post-wedding brunch. What the heck is a post-wedding brunch? I really don't want to be eating eggs and basking in the light of the happy couple's afterglow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I pray that I will never be so jaded about new life as to be upset or offended by a chance to celebrate it. I call hooey on that accusation. Questioning why having a new baby calls for multiple celebrations of made-up milestones—and multiple opportunities where gifts are expected—doesn't mean a person is "jaded about new life." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Okra Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Even the invitation stating "if able..." - to me that's meaningless; no one is going to come without the diapers. "Bring diapers....if able....". = everybody brings diapers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NASDAQ Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I am having my fifth. I don't want to throw that many parties, let alone attend them. All my friends have a bunch too. I'd do nothing but attend baby parties. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 What the heck is a post-wedding brunch? I really don't want to be eating eggs and basking in the light of the happy couple's afterglow. The one I've been to was a brunch buffet at the hotel where everyone stayed on the morning after the wedding. I thought it was a nice gesture. Most people traveled to attend the wedding. I don't remember the bride and groom attending. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 And are you expected to bring gifts to each event? :) Seems like what was a nice way of blessing a soon to be mom with much needed baby items has morphed into a "gimme more" mentality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathryn Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I first heard of this on my birth board on Babycenter this time around. I don't like it. The only one I thought was cute was where the gender reveal WAS the shower, and the reveal was to the couple. They had the sonographer write it down and seal it in an envelope whichever he mom gave to the shower hostess. The hostess sent out the invites with the gender so the guests knew which to buy for, but the parents didn't know until the party. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyroo Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 After thinking about it for a while, I have decided that it isn't the existence of all the parties that I am against, but rather the execution of many of the parties that I think is ridiculous. It seems for some people that any baby-related party is modeled after a 5 year old's birthday party: guessing games, races, crafts, color-themed foods and drinks, etc. The whole thing ends up seeming, to me, childish, boring and overblown. If you want to have a party to celebrate the presence or absence of your fetus' Y chromosome, great, I'd love to come hang out and chat at a barbecue or a potluck. It seems pretty juvenile, though, to make the gender reveal into a momentous, theatrical surprise. I really don't care the gender of your baby (even the gender of my own babies wasn't THAT exciting; there were only two choices and I would have been happy with either), so please don't make me feign surprised excitement as you cut colored cakes, release colored balloons, splash colored paints, etc. Wendy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink and Green Mom Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 What the heck is a post-wedding brunch? I really don't want to be eating eggs and basking in the light of the happy couple's afterglow. We had one the day after my wedding. The overwhelming majority of people were from out of town and staying in a hotel. My parents had a brunch/buffet/open house the next morning at their home for anyone still in town who wanted to come and eat. It was really just a chance to get to spend some more time with extended family who made the trip. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom@shiloh Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 The one I've been to was a brunch buffet at the hotel where everyone stayed on the morning after the wedding. I thought it was a nice gesture. Most people traveled to attend the wedding. I don't remember the bride and groom attending. I've been to these and the bride and groom DID attend -- I have no idea why they would do that. Seriously? You don't want to just kinda be alone?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicianmom Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I blame reality tv and Pinterest for all this. My youngest is almost 5, and the gender reveal party is something I'd never heard of back then. But one of my friends found out she was going to be an aunt, and first thing she says? "Oh, I've got to get busy and plan the gender reveal party!" I kind of felt sorry for her, she's a busy single mom, and she obviously felt an obligation to do this. Suddenly this new "tradition" is just as expected as Thanksgiving dinner! Don't even get me started on all these other new traditions like maternity photoshoots! But that's the cold-hearted cynical side of me. The nice side of my brain remembers that in Biblical cultures they threw parties when the kid weaned. So times change and I musn't be a fuddy-duddy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shawthorne44 Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I first heard of this on my birth board on Babycenter this time around. I don't like it. The only one I thought was cute was where the gender reveal WAS the shower, and the reveal was to the couple. They had the sonographer write it down and seal it in an envelope whichever he mom gave to the shower hostess. The hostess sent out the invites with the gender so the guests knew which to buy for, but the parents didn't know until the party. That is sort of cute. But, how could anyone not stare in love and amazement at the first view of their baby. I remember thinking "Now I understand why Tom Cruise bought one of these machines." It had been pretty obvious that DD was a girl, but then the important part could have just been out of focus. My friend had a sonogram where her son had legs spread and butt planted against the stomach. It was really really obvious it was a boy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I've been to these and the bride and groom DID attend -- I have no idea why they would do that. Seriously? You don't want to just kinda be alone?? In lots of cultures weddings were, or still are 3 days or more. That we are returning to that tradition in some places doesn't seem strange to me. If my out of town family that I never see makes it for the weekend I could see wanting to spend time with them more than just the actual reception. You get so little time with people there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SarahW Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 It had been pretty obvious that DD was a girl, but then the important part could have just been out of focus. My friend had a sonogram where her son had legs spread and butt planted against the stomach. It was really really obvious it was a boy. Lol, Babypants was like that. The tech helpfully added an arrow and the word "boy" to the pic, but I was like, "Lady, it's obvious enough already!" :smilielol5: Oh, another baby party that mystifies me - Blessingway ceremonies. I mean, instead of "all of the above" I guess it could be nice. I just know that there's no way anyone's painting henna on my pregnant INFJ belly at a party. :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excelsior! Academy Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 The one I've been to was a brunch buffet at the hotel where everyone stayed on the morning after the wedding. I thought it was a nice gesture. Most people traveled to attend the wedding. I don't remember the bride and groom attending. We had one the day after my wedding. The overwhelming majority of people were from out of town and staying in a hotel. My parents had a brunch/buffet/open house the next morning at their home for anyone still in town who wanted to come and eat. It was really just a chance to get to spend some more time with extended family who made the trip. I've been to these and the bride and groom DID attend -- I have no idea why they would do that. Seriously? You don't want to just kinda be alone?? We had one with just my parents and dh's parents. We traveled out of town and it was included in our "wedding package" so we went. Frankly, it was awkward and I wished we hadn't felt obligated to go or at least went alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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