Does anyone have 2 children?

[sea_mommy]

I'll admit, in real life, I feel a little . . . like the oddball.  Most people who homeschool have more children than I do.  Does anyone here have 2 children (and not planning/able to have more)?

 

I guess I just need some encouragement and to know that I'm not alone.  :)

[Mom2pandc]

I have 2. And we are done :). I have a ds10 and dd7.

[dzingirl]

I have 2 and we are done and took surgical measures to be sure. Love my kids, but I am not cut out to be the mother of a large brood.

[Gil]

I have two! I truly hope that I don't have any more! I love them to bits but sometimes I really, really miss my pre-parenthood days.

[Stars]

DS6 and DD4.  And that's it, ever.  I know what you mean about feeling like the odd one.  We're the only hs family we know who owns regular 5-seater automobiles! 

[SeaConquest]

Two boys, 5 and 7 months. We are done.

[maize]

Several of my homeschooling friends have two children without plans for more.

[NASDAQ]

I have more, but nearly everyone at the local co-op has one or two. A little boy asked me why I keep having babies :lol:

 

It's very regional.

[alisha]

Yes, both boys, ages 7 & almost 4 and no more! I'm with you on feeling like an oddball in the homeschool community. 

Thank you, I also needed to see this.

[redsquirrel]

I have two boys almost 5 years apart.  Every other homeschooler I know in town (personally know) has only 2 kids as well.

[momto2blessings]

I understand....two here also....11 and 14.

[Maela]

In our area it's rare for homeschoolers to have just two, also.

 

I have two: Dd (6) and Ds (4).  Dh had a vasectomy a few months after we had Ds.  We're very happy with just two!  Like someone above said, I am not cut out to have a lot of kids.  I like a bit of peace and quiet, I'm an introvert, and a minimalist wannabe.

[Ellie]

Only two. Sometimes it seemed like seven or eight, but no, just two. :001_smile:

[ElizabethB]

I have two. It does vary by region, some states we have lived it seems like "ony two." Others, not as much.

When we lived in Germany, we had friends with 7 and the Germans looked at them like they had 7 heads, not 7 kids. People would look and count and stare. Our German neighbors had 3, they said that a lot of Germans thought 3 was too many.

[mamaraby]

I wanted to stop at two, but we were a few months late on the vasectomy so we have three. A number of the homeschooling families in my area only have two. :0)

[LucyStoner]

Anything more than 3 is pretty unusual around where I live. 1-2 is the norm for homeschoolers here. We have 2 but would like to have 1 more in the next couple of years.

[fdrinca]

I'm curious when you say "varies by region" - what regions do you mean? Where are people having lots of babies?

[lea_lpz]

I am expecting my 3rd and would like more but I know homeschoolers with 2 and some with only children. I don't think it's that unusual but we live in a very expensive area so I think families are smaller. On the other hand, I feel like I get a lot of support for having more than 2 in the homeschool community that I wouldn't be getting else where in our community. Most people seem to feel more than 2 is crazy.

Personally I feel family size is very personal and so we should all be supportive of one another and what works for different families :)

[Guest]

I have two and I often feel like an oddball; it seems like I feel that more as the kids get older and it becomes apparent that we aren't having more.

[ElizabethB]

I'm curious when you say "varies by region" - what regions do you mean? Where are people having lots of babies?

It varies by state and by region within each state, here is a by state map, maybe someone can find county level data:

http://www.pri.org/stories/2013-09-10/worlds-family-choices-series-prompts-debate-around-family-size-us

[llifeon18wheels]

Ok, now I feel like the oddball with just one and that's gonna be it.

[Tanikit]

I have two and desperately want a third, but DH says no - he has numerous valid reasons although I believe my reasons are equally valid - as time goes by though I think the no will win out and I will have to come to accept it at some point. Most of the people in our homeschooling group who have two children have only two for medical reasons (either theirs or their child/rens) - medical reasons and other reasons is what makes my husband anti a third. I know homeschoolers who have only 1 child and others who have 4 or 5 - where I live it is almost impossible to send more than 2 children through a good school though as most people believe their children need to be in private schools because of the quality of the public schools - there are still some public schools you could send your child to, but it is hard to get in them and involves terrible traffic and long driving hours to get there from where we live. 

[CAtoVA]

I have 3 and am trying for another. Where I am having 3 is somewhat a small family for homeschooling. I know very few homeschooling families with two and even with three I often feel like an "oddball." But this is only among homeschooling families like when I am at a convention or at co-op. Otherwise many people in my area have one or two children. There seems like a "great divide," LOL.

 

Even on these boards I often feel like an "oddball" with my three as many women here have many more than that.

[Sherry in OH]

I have two.  I frequently feel odd, but not because of my family size. 

 

[a27mom]

I have 2. Though not exactly by choice. My husband only wanted 2 I wanted 4. 3seemed like a good compromise, but 2 is all we got. :) Which I am fine with.

3 seems to be the common number in my area actually. But I have other homeschooling friends with 2 and 1 friend with 11 so it varies.

[LuvToRead]

I only have two.  Most families in our homeschool group have more than two. 

 

[Susie in MS]

If I had my way my quiver would be overflowing, but God had other plans. I do have more than the two you asked about, but my oldest 3 are grown and my youngest is pretty much an only. I do feel odd. But I am around others who were not able to give birth more than 1 and 2 times due to health reasons. Because of that I feel less odd. 

[MotherOfBoys]

I have two. I don't have anyone in town with two or less. My first is extremely hyper and when we got married we didn't even want kids. 

 

The people with lots of kids are less likely to care about play dates, it seems. My kids need other kids but the big families in town seem to have enough where it doesn't matter to them. They also can make me feel like my priorities are out of wack.

[Lizzie in Ma]

We have 2, 17 and 13.

[alisoncooks]

We have two and no plans for more.  We're fairly average around here...

[cintinative]

We have two also. Among homeschool families we may be a bit odd but overall we are not. And if those families had our infants they might have stopped at two also. We got no sleep for about three years. LOL. =)

[Changed]

I have four children, but I'll say I feel like the oddball around homeschoolers because when lunch time comes I pull out fruit roll-ups, pb and j sandwiches (not organic or whole wheat!), and drink grape juice! Everyone else pulls out carrots, hummus, organic whole fruit, water, etc. :tongue_smilie:

[regentrude]

I have 2.

[Jess4879]

I have three (and we're done), but most of the homeschool families in my area have four or more.  I recently organized a field trip and had 4 families signed up and the class was full.  I was shocked.  LOL

[Jane in NC]

When my son was younger, I felt less out of place as the parent of an only and more out of place because of my homeschool curricular/methodology choices:  TWTM and not some canned thing.  Not using Saxon math or Apologia??  Heaven forbid!  I think that choices have broadened though and people are less rigid. (I hope.)

 

 

 

[...................]

2 here as well.

And it's not "only two"

It's two wonderful amazing blessings from God.

My husband and I took surgical measures to be sure - we felt we have limitations from our childhood, mental health, and financially that two was our maximum responsible. Physically we only could have had maybe one more anyway as I had surgery on my cervix. So I think that was yet another confirmation.

Most of my homeschool friends have more children too. But I never really think about it. I am fulfilled with my two! :)

[Chrysalis Academy]

I have two.  That's pretty typical where I live, for my demographic at least.

[mom31257]

I have 2 children, 6 years apart in age. In our hearts we wished we'd had 1-2 more, but getting pregnant was not easy for us. I was 36 when I had my last. My dh has never made a lot of money, either, so we didn't want to make it difficult to take care of them. 

[HSinNH]

I have two girls, two years apart. I would have liked to have two more, but DH was ALL DONE. Since I was not dying to have more, two it is. DH is an only child, so that might have something to do with it. Also, we had two of his kids from a previous relationship living with us, but we did not homeschool them.

[waa510]

I hear you! I am definitely in the minority with my 2. *shrug* I tend to be in the minority in most aspects of life, so it's OK. It does get exasperating to be asked if/when I'm expecting my third...as though it's an obvious choice. I'm stretched with two, honestly. My kids are intense and strong-willed! I don't need to add to my plate!

[fdrinca]

It varies by state and by region within each state, here is a by state map, maybe someone can find county level data:

http://www.pri.org/stories/2013-09-10/worlds-family-choices-series-prompts-debate-around-family-size-us

 

I Googled around and found this, too, but the highest birth rate on this map is 2.48. I understand it's an average, but I'm really curious about this notion of "it's regional" as an attitude rather than a fact. My husband teaches college statistics,and I'm always on the lookout for ways in which popular conceptions of data are true or false. "It's regional" sounds anecdotal.

[Crimson Wife]

I suspect if someone were to map percentage of families that have >2 kids and to map median housing cost per square foot, there would be an inverse correlation of the two (e.g. the higher the cost of housing, the fewer families choose to have >2 kids). Same-sex siblings can share a bedroom (though I wouldn't personally do more than 3 siblings per room), but families with 3+ kids are much more likely to have kids of both genders.

One reason we moved across the San Francisco Bay in 2009 was because my oldest was getting to the age where it was no longer appropriate for her to be sharing a bedroom with her younger brother (they were 6 & 3 at the time). We needed a 3rd bedroom and headed to the East Bay where housing is cheaper than the Peninsula.

[sbgrace]

I have two as well. I'm not able to have more, and I do feel incredibly thankful I was able to have our boys. Though I didn't really have a choice, this is the right size for us.

 

We are also in the clear minority here, but our previous homeschooling area was much more lopsided.

[Cheekymama]

Just 2 for us!

[ElizabethB]

We have moved a lot, including 9 times over the last 12 years. There is a definite difference by area, we notice when we are looking for houses now, after accidently moving to an area with almost no kids when just looking by house location and not demographics when the kids were younger.

[...................]

@Crimson- I can't believe how many families in my homeschool group have more than 2 kids.  Considering the cost of housing here in the south bay area, it's pretty surprising.  But, as you said, once you have two genders, you could easily fit 2 more kids into a 3 bedroom house, and a lot of these old houses from the 60's have four small bedrooms!  

[fdrinca]

I suspect if someone were to map percentage of families that have >2 kids and to map median housing cost per square foot, there would be an inverse correlation of the two (e.g. the higher the cost of housing, the fewer families choose to have >2 kids). Same-sex siblings can share a bedroom (though I wouldn't personally do more than 3 siblings per room), but families with 3+ kids are much more likely to have kids of both genders.

One reason we moved across the San Francisco Bay in 2009 was because my oldest was getting to the age where it was no longer appropriate for her to be sharing a bedroom with her younger brother (they were 6 & 3 at the time). We needed a 3rd bedroom and headed to the East Bay where housing is cheaper than the Peninsula.

 

I don't want to hijack a conversation, but I'm still curious about the "regional" attitude. The aggregate data suggest that the fertility rate isn't *much* higher than 2.5 children at the highest end of average. While there would be an inverse relationship between housing costs and number of children, I don't think many use cheap housing as motivation for having many children. Does a high cost of living suppress fertility? Probably. I don't think, however, that a lower cost of living increases fertility that much.

[ElizabethB]

I Googled around and found this, too, but the highest birth rate on this map is 2.48. I understand it's an average, but I'm really curious about this notion of "it's regional" as an attitude rather than a fact. My husband teaches college statistics,and I'm always on the lookout for ways in which popular conceptions of data are true or false. "It's regional" sounds anecdotal.

Some stats within a few cities at the bottom of this page:

http://www.newgeography.com/content/004169-americas-future-cities-where-the-youth-population-is-booming

[a27mom]

I suspect if someone were to map percentage of families that have >2 kids and to map median housing cost per square foot, there would be an inverse correlation of the two (e.g. the higher the cost of housing, the fewer families choose to have >2 kids). Same-sex siblings can share a bedroom (though I wouldn't personally do more than 3 siblings per room), but families with 3+ kids are much more likely to have kids of both genders.One reason we moved across the San Francisco Bay in 2009 was because my oldest was getting to the age where it was no longer appropriate for her to be sharing a bedroom with her younger brother (they were 6 & 3 at the time). We needed a 3rd bedroom and headed to the East Bay where housing is cheaper than the Peninsula.

  

I Googled around and found this, too, but the highest birth rate on this map is 2.48. I understand it's an average, but I'm really curious about this notion of "it's regional" as an attitude rather than a fact. My husband teaches college statistics,and I'm always on the lookout for ways in which popular conceptions of data are true or false. "It's regional" sounds anecdotal.

I think the OP is speaking of homeschooling families having more than 2 children, not families in general. There isn't really much hard data about the make up of homeschool families, so I would imagine it has to be somewhat anecdotal. But there is a "regional" nature to homeschooling trends. though it may be more related to a specific area. There are some religious movements that push both having large families and homeschooling. So in regions where these groups have high numbers, there is going to be larger homeschooling families in general.

[Crimson Wife]

I think the OP is speaking of homeschooling families having more than 2 children, not families in general. There isn't really much hard data about the make up of homeschool families, so I would imagine it has to be somewhat anecdotal. But there is a "regional" nature to homeschooling trends. though it may be more related to a specific area. There are some religious movements that push both having large families and homeschooling. So in regions where these groups have high numbers, there is going to be larger homeschooling families in general.

Well, it has been my observation that families I know IRL who HS are far more likely to have multiple children rather than "one and done". Private school is often do-able for a single child but once you start looking at 2+, it's out of the budget. That has nothing to do with religion and everything to do with finances.