Does anyone have 2 children?

[...................]

There are more big homeschool families where I now live (one of the highest costs of living in the US) than in the homeschool group where I used to live. (Definitely much much lower cost of living. 40% to be exact.)

[ElizabethB]

In Arkansas, many homeschoolers with large families live in NW Arkansas. (Where the Duggars live, they alone could be weighting the averages, LOL!)

Here is an the most recent AR report, by county homeschool enrollment is on a map near the end. Also, everyone has to take the test, so the numbers are a fair representation of what the average homeschooler is doing. We moved out of AR before we had to test:

http://www.arkansased.org/public/userfiles/Learning_Services/Charter%20and%20Home%20School/Home%20School-Division%20of%20Learning%20Services/2012_2013_Home_School_Report.pdf

Actually, there is a lot of interesting info in there, maybe I will start a thread about it...

[Jackie]

I have an only child who will remain an only child. So your two doesn't seem that small to me. ;-)

[bibliophile]

I have four children, but I'll say I feel like the oddball around homeschoolers because when lunch time comes I pull out fruit roll-ups, pb and j sandwiches (not organic or whole wheat!), and drink grape juice! Everyone else pulls out carrots, hummus, organic whole fruit, water, etc. :tongue_smilie:

It is possible that they only eat that way when they get together with other homeschoolers. :)

[Crimson Wife]

It is possible that they only eat that way when they get together with other homeschoolers. :)

Or even if they do allow some junk food consumption, they may avoid it when they're in group situations where someone might judge them for it. I follow the 90/10 rule but that 10% tends not to be at park days or field trips.

[Scarlett]

I have an only. In my circle of friends I can think of 6 other only homeschool children.

[freesia]

I suspect if someone were to map percentage of families that have >2 kids and to map median housing cost per square foot, there would be an inverse correlation of the two (e.g. the higher the cost of housing, the fewer families choose to have >2 kids). Same-sex siblings can share a bedroom (though I wouldn't personally do more than 3 siblings per room), but families with 3+ kids are much more likely to have kids of both genders.

One reason we moved across the San Francisco Bay in 2009 was because my oldest was getting to the age where it was no longer appropriate for her to be sharing a bedroom with her younger brother (they were 6 & 3 at the time). We needed a 3rd bedroom and headed to the East Bay where housing is cheaper than the Peninsula.

Possibly, but I live in a very high COL area and, in our homeschool group, there are far more families with 3 or more than there are with less than 3 (36:23). It is a Christian homeschool group, so that may have something to do with it. It is possible the secular group has a smaller average.

[nature girl]

The only families I know with more than 3 are hs'ing families, and they all hs for religious reasons. I think that might be what the OP was getting at? The average size of a family in the US is fewer than 3 kids...

[Changed]

Or even if they do allow some junk food consumption, they may avoid it when they're in group situations where someone might judge them for it. I follow the 90/10 rule but that 10% tends not to be at park days or field trips.

I allow the quick junk foods when we're out so it keeps them extra happy and because it's easier to throw together. :-)

[Desert Strawberry]

I'm curious when you say "varies by region" - what regions do you mean? Where are people having lots of babies?

 

In Louisiana, 3-4 is average. Two is very unusual. The only small families I know are due to fertility difficulties. This is true whether or not they homeschool.

 

I am originally from Southern California. 0-2 is normal. The largest families I had ever met had 5 children. All were members of religions which strongly encourage larger family sizes.  Homeschooled families were not larger than average. Maybe more families had 2 than 1, but I don't remember seeing many families with 3, and definitely no more than that.

Of my high school class(everyone I can locate), there are only 2 of us with 4 kids. The other mom has a set of twins. The vast majority have 0 or 1.

[sassenach]

I'm curious when you say "varies by region" - what regions do you mean? Where are people having lots of babies?

I think the cheaper it is to live in a place, the bigger the families are. In FL, 4 kids was totally average. In NorCal, we're freaks.

[CrunchyGirl]

We have 3 (and are done) but we currently live in the Midwest and I know how the OP feels. We are a small family in HS circles.

[sassenach]

Possibly, but I live in a very high COL area and, in our homeschool group, there are far more families with 3 or more than there are with less than 3 (36:23). It is a Christian homeschool group, so that may have something to do with it. It is possible the secular group has a smaller average.

 

My experience is that makes a difference, though I still think the overall family size of Christians here is smaller than Christian families in the south.  I didn't know any 1 child families there, unless they were on their way to more kids.  Here I know many.  

[Desert Strawberry]

I Googled around and found this, too, but the highest birth rate on this map is 2.48. I understand it's an average, but I'm really curious about this notion of "it's regional" as an attitude rather than a fact. My husband teaches college statistics,and I'm always on the lookout for ways in which popular conceptions of data are true or false. "It's regional" sounds anecdotal.

These stats do not measure birth rate. They measure the number of children in the average home.

 

In most large families have a broad age span, meaning that not all "children" in a family will be children at the same time. If, like in Louisiana, teens and young adults tend to leave the nest early, many older teens will be counted as head-of-household and not as children.

 

If families tend to be blended, the same child is divided among two households. A blended family with 5 kids may be counted as a family of 3.5 once alternate residences are figured in. But if all the kids are homeschooled, there is no way to know by looking that some of the kids don't"count".

 

These stats also factor in all of the households with 0 children. It is possible that only 1 in 10 couples have children, but those who do have 10 children each. The birth rate at that point is 1 child per family. But a household with a single child would be far outside the norm. 

[PeachyDoodle]

We have two: dd8 and ds3. We are most definitely done and have taken measures to ensure it.

 

I would have considered a third, but let's just say I am very, very bad at being pregnant. :tongue_smilie:

 

DH would have gone along either way, I think. But we got one girl and one boy, and he's happy with that.

 

I don't feel like an oddball here (central NC), but we don't know that many homeschooling families, and the ones we do know mostly have two or three kids.

[Dolphin]

I have two as well. I would love to have more, but that is not going to happen. 

This is me too.

[redsquirrel]

I have four children, but I'll say I feel like the oddball around homeschoolers because when lunch time comes I pull out fruit roll-ups, pb and j sandwiches (not organic or whole wheat!), and drink grape juice! Everyone else pulls out carrots, hummus, organic whole fruit, water, etc. :tongue_smilie:

 

Well, I don't bring PB to public places due to possible nut allergies. I'd hate to be the cause of someone having to leave a group setting. But, the whole wheat bread and no juice still applies at home I am afraid, lol.

 

Around here, if you have more than three kids people will assume you are 'religious'. I am not kidding.

[ScoutTN]

Two here, dd8 and ds6. I would have liked one or maybe two more, but we weren't able to. We got married late and walked the infertility road, so I am so happy to have two, lovely, healthy children!
We do have a smaller family than most homeschoolers here.

[ammv15]

I have have two and that is enough for me.Though most around here have 2-4.

[Dramorellis]

I have 3 and in my area people tend to look at us like we are insane. Even among the homeschoolers we are on the "too many children" spectrum. I get lots of double takes as people count how many I am trailing. This is very regional as well as tied to education levels and socioeconomic backgrounds in my experience. In terms of where I have lived, the higher the education level of the mother typically means less children. Most of my female piers that I grew up with have advanced degrees, have spent time building careers before beginning to think about having children. If you don't begin before 32, it's unlikely you will have 6 children for instance. The household income plays a part as well. I place no judgments, just seems to be something I have noticed. Where my cousin lives in Florida, her very closely spaced 4 homeschooled children do not elicit a second take but in Southern Ca. where we both are from, we cause a commotion. 

[...................]

It definitely varies by region!

Let's talk about non-homeschool people...

There are so many families with only one child here! They are everywhere and I think it's very strange. (Nor Cal)

In FL the only reason you'd have one child is that you were unable to have more. I rarely ever met anyone with only one child.

[...................]

Sad true story ....I met a nice mom and liked her two boys. Then six more young children piled out and I realized that if I invited them over I would have 14 people in my house....so I put off the idea. Turns out we have some fairly serious ideological differences that would have precluded a close friendship anyway...but I did wonder if large families ever get left out for that reason....

[MerryAtHope]

Love my two kids and so glad we homeschool!

[CAtoVA]

Ohhhhh, so that's why my friends in So Cal (where I grew up but left 14 years ago) thought I was "done" at two and thought I was insane having another one. I am trying for #4 now and just don't want to hear about it from friends or family in California. My parents had 6 and had nonstop nasty comments.

 

Where I moved (college town in the SE with lots of advanced degrees ) 3 is small for homeschooling but average to large for non homeschooling families. I have an advanced degree myself so really fit nowhere, LOL!

[zenjenn]

I have two and know a ton of people who homeschool two children. I even know a few that homeschool an only child!

 

But we have a disproportionate number of people in our community that homeschool primarily for non-religious reasons (or for whom religious reasons are very secondary.) That's the difference I think. In communities where the more common motivation is religious, you see more large families.

[elegantlion]

We have one and that's where we wanted to stop. 

[retiredHSmom]

I Googled around and found this, too, but the highest birth rate on this map is 2.48. I understand it's an average, but I'm really curious about this notion of "it's regional" as an attitude rather than a fact. My husband teaches college statistics,and I'm always on the lookout for ways in which popular conceptions of data are true or false. "It's regional" sounds anecdotal.

I suspect if anything it is regional by county.  I live in a very conservative Catholic diocese.  I know so many families with 6+ children that I am having trouble counting them at the moment.  Interestingly enough, it is also a high COL area.

[kitten18]

I have 3 and in my area people tend to look at us like we are insane. Even among the homeschoolers we are on the "too many children" spectrum. I get lots of double takes as people count how many I am trailing. This is very regional as well as tied to education levels and socioeconomic backgrounds in my experience. In terms of where I have lived, the higher the education level of the mother typically means less children. Most of my female piers that I grew up with have advanced degrees, have spent time building careers before beginning to think about having children. If you don't begin before 32, it's unlikely you will have 6 children for instance. The household income plays a part as well. I place no judgments, just seems to be something I have noticed. Where my cousin lives in Florida, her very closely spaced 4 homeschooled children do not elicit a second take but in Southern Ca. where we both are from, we cause a commotion. 

:iagree:   I agree, especially with the bolded.  Most of the women I know were at least 30 (many were 35+) before having their first child.

 

 

We have two.  Most families I know have two, even the homeschoolers.

[kitten18]

I suspect if anything it is regional by county.  I live in a very conservative Catholic diocese.  I know so many families with 6+ children that I am having trouble counting them at the moment.  Interestingly enough, it is also a high COL area.

 

My county has almost 10 million people, there's a lot of diversity in that 10 million.

 

For my area there can big differences within 15-20 miles, it's more about specific towns, even neighborhoods. 

[freesia]

I have 3 and in my area people tend to look at us like we are insane. Even among the homeschoolers we are on the "too many children" spectrum. I get lots of double takes as people count how many I am trailing. This is very regional as well as tied to education levels and socioeconomic backgrounds in my experience. In terms of where I have lived, the higher the education level of the mother typically means less children. Most of my female piers that I grew up with have advanced degrees, have spent time building careers before beginning to think about having children. If you don't begin before 32, it's unlikely you will have 6 children for instance. The household income plays a part as well. I place no judgments, just seems to be something I have noticed. Where my cousin lives in Florida, her very closely spaced 4 homeschooled children do not elicit a second take but in Southern Ca. where we both are from, we cause a commotion.

Maybe, but I'm going to be the outlier again. :-)

As I said, in my high COL area, we have a majority of large families. Some of the colleges the Moms attended: Mt. Holyoke, U of Michigan, Amherst, MIT, UNC Chapel Hill. We have an aeronautical engineer with 4, a chiropractor with 6 (I don't know where they attended college). So,in my area, it is faith that makes the difference.

[NASDAQ]

I had two kids during law school alone, but there is a long of pressure to postpone childbirth in those circles.

People stare at my kids. It's that weird.

Also, I bring a big bag of cookies to home school gatherings and they all disappear immediately. I love when the co op goes heavy on the kale casserole. Makes it so much easier to enforce kosher -- sorry, 3 yo, no kale with brewer's yeast for you. Cookie?

[placeofgrace]

Ok, now I feel like the oddball with just one and that's gonna be it.

 

Yep, me too!  I'm a major oddball.  Only 1 kid and a single parent!  LOL 
 

[Mommy22alyns]

Yep, just two.   :thumbup:

[Aspasia]

 

I'm curious when you say "varies by region" - what regions do you mean? Where are people having lots of babies?

I have lived in two extreme regions when it comes to family size. We grew up in Utah and currently live in the DC area. Dh is one of eight children and I am one of four (which always felt like a small family to me growing up). The average number of children for my high school friends is four, though I have several friends with five or six, and counting (we are 32/33 years old).

Contrast that with the DC area, where people have one or two, if any. We are expecting our fourth, and even living way out in the suburbs, our neighbors thought we were insane when they learned of this pregnancy. Most of them have one or two kids, if any. Homeschoolers may average a tiny bit more, but even most homeschoolers around here have one or two, MAYBE three.

It's so weird for us to have people ogling at the idea of four kids. In Utah, with four kids you're just getting started! ;)

So yeah, it's regional. And yes, it has a lot to do with religion (though we aren't terribly religious, we did grow up very Mormon and absorbed certain Mormon values). Other states where the Mormon population is quite large (Idaho, Arizona, etc) are also places where big families don't draw attention. But it isn't necessarily driven directly by religious beliefs. I know lots of people in Utah who aren't religious but still choose to have big families. They may just be influenced by the culture around them, which is very pro-family.

I have 3 and in my area people tend to look at us like we are insane. Even among the homeschoolers we are on the "too many children" spectrum. I get lots of double takes as people count how many I am trailing. This is very regional as well as tied to education levels and socioeconomic backgrounds in my experience. In terms of where I have lived, the higher the education level of the mother typically means less children. Most of my female piers that I grew up with have advanced degrees, have spent time building careers before beginning to think about having children. If you don't begin before 32, it's unlikely you will have 6 children for instance. The household income plays a part as well. I place no judgments, just seems to be something I have noticed. Where my cousin lives in Florida, her very closely spaced 4 homeschooled children do not elicit a second take but in Southern Ca. where we both are from, we cause a commotion.

 

Isn't that funny? I get the rude comments here ("You do know what causes that, right? Ha ha!"). We recently went on a trip to Utah, and at our airport and our layover airport, we felt like a freaking circus. Everyone stared. It was so refreshing to get to Salt Lake and feel normal!

[dewdropfairy]

It was so refreshing to get to Salt Lake and feel normal!

 

Yes, or possibly even on the smaller side of "normal!" :lol:

 

I grew up in an area where large families were dominant and now live in an area where 4 is approaching crazy. :leaving:

[pantone]

Two here as well. (10 and 12) I don't want more, he doesn't want more. When my mom asked, he told her "If she wants another kid, she can find another husband to take care of it." 

"Oh, so you'd give up YOUR two?" 

"No. Didn't say THAT. He can just take care of his." 

"So she can start marrying a whole harem?" 

"Heck, if anyone wants to start throwing more paychecks into the bank, I'm good with that! It'd be nice if he was good with home repairs, too!" 

 

I always did like his sense of humor. 

 

:-) 

[edelweiss]

I have two kids.  We are done.   :001_smile:

[Jackie]

Just to throw into the "it's regional" mix . . .

I live in an odd town. Bible Belt, population about 80,000-ish, home to a huge state university. (The university is why population is so hard to measure. The college has a total of about 60,000 students. There's about 60,000-70,000 people in the town with no student status. Some live here year-round, some are part-time students, a majority of students live off campus, so who to count is a matter of opinion.) because of the university, our population is very educated compared to our state.

Homeschooling here has a great divide, with many in the middle. Many professors (or professer's spouses) homeschool and do so for primarily academic reasons. We're in the Bible Belt, so many people homeschool for primarily religious reasons. There very little overlap between the two. We have one large all-inclusive homeschooling group, and several smaller church-based homeschooling groups. Overall, the professional academics have 1-3 children. Overall, the religious group families have 3-8 children. I see differences in numbers. I see differences in homeschooling attitudes, approaches, and philosophies. I can easily see how regions, and even micro-regions, could exist.

[4KookieKids]

Thought this was interesting:

http://www.responsiblehomeschooling.org/homeschooling-101/homeschool-demographics/

 

Also, according to this, it seems 2-3 kids isn't really so odd "on average".

"In 2007, homeschool family size was as follows: one child (7%); two children (25%); three children (26%); four to six children (36%); seven or more children (6%)."

 

Along the same lines: http://www.mlive.com/education/index.ssf/2012/01/homeschooling_by_the_census_nu.html

[fourcatmom]

I have two. 14 months and 1 day apart. They are 13 and 12 now. In hindsight though I wish I that I had more. :lol:

[lea_lpz]

It varies by state and by region within each state, here is a by state map, maybe someone can find county level data:

http://www.pri.org/stories/2013-09-10/worlds-family-choices-series-prompts-debate-around-family-size-us

It does not seem to vary by much though. I mean its basically states are all somewhere between a bit under 2 to 2 1/2 kids, which means the norm is still 2. Even in Utah, it's like 2.5.

[lea_lpz]

[quote name="deanna1ynne" post="5534937" timestamp="1394849824"]

Thought this was interesting:
http://www.responsiblehomeschooling.org/homeschooling-101/homeschool-demographics/

Also, according to this, it seems 2-3 kids isn't really so odd "on average".
"In 2007, homeschool family size was as follows: one child (7%); two children (25%); three children (26%); four to six children (36%); seven or more children (6%)."

Along the same lines: [url="%5Burl="http://www.mlive.com/education/index.ssf/2012/01/homeschooling_by_the_census_nu.html%22%5Dhttp://www.mlive.com/education/index.ssf/2012/01/homeschooling_by_the_census_nu.html"%5Dhttp://www.mlive.com/education/index.ssf/2012/01/homeschooling_by_the_census_nu.html"]http://www.mlive.com/education/index.ssf/2012/01/homeschooling_by_the_census_nu.html[/url][/]

From what I see this seems about right in the homeschool group / activities with other homeschool families. I know a couple parents with only one child. Never by choice but because they can't have more. I know a sizable amount with 2-3 kids, by choice, so hardly the odd man out. Then I notice that more families in the homeschool community have 4-6 kids then the rest of our community. But I don't think that the families with 4-6 outnumber the 2-3 families. I have never meet any mega families. I know one family with 7 children. That's it. I had a friend who was homeschooled and was one of eight. She was homeschooled in the 80's/90's so I think that was more common.Those are the largest homeschool families I know. I belong to a Christian homeschool group though so this is maybe a factor. Secular groups might be more comparable to non homeschool families.

[lea_lpz]

Thought this was interesting:
http://www.responsiblehomeschooling.org/homeschooling-101/homeschool-demographics/

Also, according to this, it seems 2-3 kids isn't really so odd "on average".
"In 2007, homeschool family size was as follows: one child (7%); two children (25%); three children (26%); four to six children (36%); seven or more children (6%)."

Along the same lines: http://www.mlive.com/education/index.ssf/2012/01/homeschooling_by_the_census_nu.html

I think the fact both parents are more likely to work is fascinating! I am in school part time and plan to work part time after graduating so its nice to know I will not be alone.

[alisoncooks]

Yep, this sounds very much like where I am located:

Just to throw into the "it's regional" mix . . .

I live in an odd town. Bible Belt, population about 80,000-ish, home to a huge state university. (The university is why population is so hard to measure. The college has a total of about 60,000 students. There's about 60,000-70,000 people in the town with no student status. Some live here year-round, some are part-time students, a majority of students live off campus, so who to count is a matter of opinion.) because of the university, our population is very educated compared to our state.

Homeschooling here has a great divide, with many in the middle. Many professors (or professer's spouses) homeschool and do so for primarily academic reasons. We're in the Bible Belt, so many people homeschool for primarily religious reasons. There very little overlap between the two. We have one large all-inclusive homeschooling group, and several smaller church-based homeschooling groups. Overall, the professional academics have 1-3 children. Overall, the religious group families have 3-8 children. I see differences in numbers. I see differences in homeschooling attitudes, approaches, and philosophies. I can easily see how regions, and even micro-regions, could exist.

 

[sea_mommy]

I had no idea that there were so many people!  Thank you, everyone, for your responses!

[smudge]

I have two girls two years apart. No more here, I was 38 when the younger was born. They are good friends and a lot of our school stuff we do together.

[Heathermomster]

We have two kiddos, eight years apart.

[Guest Lat Mo]

We have two.

[Coco_Clark]

To speak towards the "it's regional" aspect I agree. I'm from S. California and my family there thought my mom was INSANE to have three. I have three as well and I get constant "stop already!" comments from that crowd. Yet living in Wa, right on the Idaho border? I have trouble thinking of many families with two that aren't just starting. But I know several families of 7+. I've never had a comment on my broods size as unusual, and people assume I'm having more.

[Trish]

I'll admit, in real life, I feel a little . . . like the oddball.  Most people who homeschool have more children than I do.  Does anyone here have 2 children (and not planning/able to have more)?

 

I guess I just need some encouragement and to know that I'm not alone.  :)

 

I have two kids!

 

But, we never plan.

 

:hurray: