UmMusa Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 My kids are growing, maturing, and challenging us daily. I bicker with 2or 3 regularly. my husband and I get cranky with each other more than we used to, and I feel overworked and under appreciated. So why am I pining for another baby? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whereneverever Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doran5 Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I would have tons! If I didn't hate being pregnant. Hadn't had my tubes tied, or an ablation. But, I'm thinking that when my youngest hits the teen years, I want to adopt! DH has no clue yet ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I don't know. I thought I was done after my first, second, and third child. At one point, I almost had my tubes tied. I'm glad I did not because I wanted more. I'm pregnant with number four now (after having a miscarriage a year ago). I'll probably say I'm done after this one, but in a few years... well... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momacacia Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 You want another one because your youngest is 3 and no longer "a baby." :) At least that's kind of how it works here. We'd have gobs of babies if they would start sleeping through the night before 18 months. :confused: Clearly we do something wrong. If I can get my health back together, we may try for another, but I'm not sure I have "baby days/nights" in me again, honestly. Other than the sleep deprivation, what's not to love about them? I enjoy being pregnant and feel quite good then, I have easy births, and the nursing is beautiful. Babies are soft, snuggly, smell heavenly, and I don't know about yours, but my children are drop-dead gorgeous to gaze at. ;) As I said, if I just weren't so tired, I'd do it all over again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murphy101 Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I have no idea. I love having my kids. Even when they make me lose my mind. ;) I would happily never go through child birth again though. I hate cooking but love food too. Sigh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 Yeah I'm feeling older and just not up for those "baby days/nights". Or potty training, or drinking out of the toilet, eating toothpaste, and scribbling all over walls and books. I think I'm missing those early years when I had two little ones at home. No school, no Tae Kwondo, no football practice and girl scouts. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BakersDozen Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I think I'm missing those early years when I had two little ones at home. No school, no Tae Kwondo, no football practice and girl scouts. I am tempted to declare next semester an at-home time - no outside activities aside from mom-planned field trips and outings. I miss the days of having all my littles with me with nowhere to go, nothing to do but be with each other. It was such a sweet time and now life is so busy I feel time is ripped away from us more than ever. I have no idea.I love having my kids. Even when they make me lose my mind. ;) I would happily never go through child birth again though. :iagree: especially the bolded part! I've heard many women say they just knew when they were "done" and were content; I honestly can't imagine getting to that point which worries me greatly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theYoungerMrsWarde Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 When you have grandchildren, and you get all the fun and cute without the diapers and sleepless nights. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenniferB Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 For us it was when my health began to suffer, with our fifth pregnancy/fourth live birth. I had gestational diabetes, and I was pre-diabetic after the birth, verging on type 2 diabetes. I knew my body could not handle another pregnancy, so my DH got "the surgery." I would love more children in the house, and maybe that is in our future with foster kids or adoption, but for the sake of my health I do not desire to be pregnant again. Also, I can only give birth via c-section, so that's 4 c-sections so far, and that's enough for me. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebug42 Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 For me, it was honestly when my best friend had a baby a little over two years ago. He cried a lot and was very high maintenance. Literally, my skin would crawl when he would scream. I knew then I didn't want any more babies. Also, I do not want to chase toddlers again. I like that when the girls are in science class, I can visit with the other moms and not chase little ones any more. Also, there is nothing I hated more in this world than being pregnant. Miserable, horrible, events requiring three hospitalizations for Boo-Boo. Very happy to not do that again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 For us it was during my pregnancy. I was an awful pregnant person. I was sick most of the time, extremely moody, spent at least one full month on the sofa so sick I couldn't get up. I had 3 days of labor followed by a full anesthesia c-section. Love the result, but when my doctor even suggested I should not be pregnant again, we both sighed and agreed. I'll be honest, I went through six weeks of radiation tx, one major surgery for cancer, and that was easier than being pregnant for me. I was in charge of my emotions during cancer. during pregnancy I was in charge of nothing. Poor dh, he survived, we adore ds, but wow, so not doing that again. The baby stage was nice, but I worked in an animal hospital for five years, I've done enough poo in my life. :tongue_smilie: I have enjoyed each stage of ds's life and don't really mourn them when they pass. We have a great relationship, he's turning out to be a really cool individual, but I never had the desire for more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Well, with so many, so close, I began to have some warning signs and we decided that it was time for me to done "birthin' babies." Of course Katya entered our live in 2008 and became our daughter in 2009. I don't really want babies anymore, but my kids have noticed a pattern in me of wanting something little and cuddly every two years or so. Puppies, guinea pigs, bunnies ... I'm guessing this sort of thing will continue until grandchildren begin to arrive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I would happily never go through child birth again though. Sigh While I totally "get" this, I'm kind of strange in that I love, love, LOVE the birth process. I didn't like being pregnant, but I just had this whole sense of awe and wonder going on throughout labor and delivery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singingmom Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Me too! Hated pregnancy, but loved the process of labor and delivery ( of course, I didn't deprive myself of of pain meds, so that might have something to do with it :tongue_smilie: ) QUOTE=Cindy in C-ville;3616351]While I totally "get" this, I'm kind of strange in that I love, love, LOVE the birth process. I didn't like being pregnant, but I just had this whole sense of awe and wonder going on throughout labor and delivery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
besroma Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I don't know when/if I will feel that way. I love being pregnant, enjoy childbirth, and love the babies and the kids at different ages. I think, for me, it would be when my body gave signs that I shouldn't have anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I have no idea.I love having my kids. Even when they make me lose my mind. ;) I would happily never go through child birth again though. I hate cooking but love food too. Sigh what she said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ErinE Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 When you have grandchildren, and you get all the fun and cute without the diapers and sleepless nights. :001_smile: In the reasons to have children thread, I wanted to say, "For the grandchildren, of course." I'm years and years away from grandkids, but I'm really looking forward to it. It's a weird quirk I have. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beth S Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 We didn't really feel "finished" with Baby #5, who is now 9 yo . . . and I'm 48 yo. However, once the older kids became teenagers, I realized we really had enough to juggle with the 5 we had. I would have enjoyed getting pg again (I think), but life is plenty full with 4 teens and the 9yo! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trafal Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 My kids are 13,11,10 and 4. I felt very strongly that I wanted more children , lots of children :) But after the arrival of our 4 yr old I somehow knew that our family was complete. I can't explain it but I just knew. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer in MI Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 My kids are 13,11,10 and 4. I felt very strongly that I wanted more children , lots of children :) But after the arrival of our 4 yr old I somehow knew that our family was complete. I can't explain it but I just knew. This happened to me too. Mine are now 15.5, 14, 11, and 6. After the birth of number 4 I knew I was done. That was it. I think it helped that her pregnancy and birth were BY FAR my hardest emotionally. I don't think I could go through that again. BUT, I still wish we'd had two more inbetween the 11 and 6 yo. I lost a few in there and always thought I'd have a very large family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TKDmom Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 My kids are growing, maturing, and challenging us daily. I bicker with 2or 3 regularly. my husband and I get cranky with each other more than we used to, and I feel overworked and under appreciated. So why am I pining for another baby? :bigear: I feel the same way. DH is almost never home, I'm totally exhausted, and yet I still try to convince dh that it's time for another. Each time I bring it up, he tells me that I'm crazy and that there's no way I can handle a pregnancy right now and I think, "Yes, but...." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 (edited) Do you want my real answer or my politically correct one? Because they differ by about 9 months. ;) Edited February 16, 2012 by KidsHappen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrapbabe Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I never "longed" for children like I hear some other mothers say. I was always happy to have them. We never used birth control and only got three children. After number 3 we did birth control for awhile because I had a rocky pregnancy. We thought we might be done. Then life took over, we moved, started a business, I got cancer, and just like that 4 years were gone. Now I'm turning 38 and my baby is turning 7 and I ache for a baby. I don't want the huge gap, but I can't deny that for the first time in my life I am "longing" for a baby. For health reasons its probably not sane. But I can't help it. I'm not sure if I'm sad its over, or if there really is another baby for us. I have three boys though, and a little girl would be wonderful. :001_wub: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birkenkathy Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 My divorce pretty much did it for me. If things had turned out like I'd wanted though I think I would have kept having them, although I would have liked to skip the sleepless nights and potty training. I love pregnancy and childbirth though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mynyel Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 You stop wanting them after you have one like my ds3.5! :) Naw, I don't know when. I still get pangs for one here and there but I really don't want to have anymore. Life is to unstable for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I'll never stop wanting to have a cuddly, sleeping newborn. Unfortunately, I've never seen a model that doesn't wake, cry, poop, teethe, or eventually toddle into round the clock trouble! I'm enjoying my #5, and I have no desire to rush him along, but I'm waving goodbye with a smile to every milestone passed. This is the first time I've felt that way. Which is good, because we're done whether I feel that way or not! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G5052 Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I'll never stop wanting to have a cuddly, sleeping newborn. Unfortunately, I've never seen a model that doesn't wake, cry, poop, teethe, or eventually toddle into round the clock trouble! My offspring are now either taller than me or nearly there, and I sometimes fondly think about the tiny baby days as a contrast. Sometimes I wish I was back in the rocker with them again, but then I know that life has moved on. I don't think I ever really "arrived" at not wanting another, but it worked out that way. Teens are pretty fun too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted February 16, 2012 Author Share Posted February 16, 2012 ok, this is all helping.... *sigh* i really don't want to go back to sleepless nights, teething, screaming, dairy intolerance during breastfeeding, and all the toddler stuff... aack. i just have to ignore the urge! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rutamattatt Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I never felt "done" having children, but after our youngest was born my DH was for certain DONE. I was shocked. He was shocked I wanted more. But nearly 8 years and one older adopted daughter later, I have come to realize that I will never NOT want a baby. It is just a part of me. But I also realize wanting a baby doesn't make having one the best decision for me. I LOVE to hold my friends' babies, rock them, take a turn at night with them, change diapers - because I remember how hard that time in life was, and for me now it is just a joy. I completely spoil and mush on my dog (he's codependent, so it works for us). We are involved in an orphan hosting ministry. These things help. Even though I am happy with my life, I confess that every month when "that" time shows up, there is still a little bit of disappointment. I think there always will be, but I think that's just the way I'm wired??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radish4ever Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 Oh I was tooooooooooootally done after #3. TOTALLY. His pregnancy was absolutely MISERABLE, I felt awful, my hormones were RIDICULOUS and I cried and had the most awful, secluded pregnancy possible because I knew that if I hated being around me that much, so would everyone else! His birth was pretty traumatic, I lost a lot of blood and he got stuck, and it was yuck.... Then it took me about 12-18 months to really heal postpartum and feel normal again. Then I got a wild hair about the time my periods returned (AS USUAL. DARN IT!) and after 2 cycles (which were long and irregular), I got pregnant again.... which I found out the week after I decided we were officially done. SO now we've had to upgrade vehicles AGAIN (this time to a van - right after we'd found the PERFECT vehicle to accommodate the 3 kids in carseats last year), I JUST moved away from all of my family and friends in August, and I'm starting over with no baby supplies or anything besides my natural baby feeders. Geez! All in all, though? I am soooooo happy we decided to have another one - or at least not prevent it for a little while. :-P This pregnancy has been ENTIRELY different and my family is way less chaotic than I ever imagined at this point. We have lots of new friends and activities, homeschooling is going well, and somehow we've been able to afford everything we've needed. I have no idea when I'll feel done. I hope it's after this one, but I don't know... Even with my HORRIBLE pregnancy and birth....he was over 18 months when I changed my mind! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilymax Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I didn't think I would ever stop wanting more babies. Because of PCOS infertility issues, all of my babies were hard to conceive and hard to keep carrying. Yet, as soon as DS3 was born, I wanted to TTC again because of my loudly-ticking biological clock. I had a lot of issues during that pregnancy and postpartum--including a cardiomyopathy scare that didn't turn out to be that, but was still scary enough to make me have second thoughts about putting my body through that again. However, my desire for a fourth child always overrode those fears. I finally convinced DH that we should leave it up to God. So far, God has said no...and I have finally reached the point that I'm OK with that. Two main reasons: DS3 is a terrible sleeper and I have not had a decent nights' rest in nearly three years. Neither DH nor I think we are up to another three years starting over again with a newborn. But we are looking into older child adoption to maybe have the size family we always dreamed of. My test was tonight, when I went to see a friend who had a baby girl on Monday. The baby was so precious and it was odd being at the same hospital where my youngest was born. I held her for a long time and felt...nothing. None of that familiar stirring to have another! Amazing! I didn't think that urge for a baby would ever go away, but it has. It's nice to feel peace over it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roseyloxs Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 We want four. We have two. I really hope I get the 'done' feeling after 4. My grandmother had 8 kids. She said people would always ask her, "How many kids are you going to have?" She always answered, "As many as God will give me." I don't picture myself having that large of a family but I do have to say having 20 or so cousins growing up was a lot of fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 My kids are growing, maturing, and challenging us daily. I bicker with 2or 3 regularly. my husband and I get cranky with each other more than we used to, and I feel overworked and under appreciated. So why am I pining for another baby? :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plucky Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 We didn't really feel "finished" with Baby #5, who is now 9 yo . . . and I'm 48 yo. However, once the older kids became teenagers, I realized we really had enough to juggle with the 5 we had. I would have enjoyed getting pg again (I think), but life is plenty full with 4 teens and the 9yo! Yep! A house full of teens makes you plenty grateful for stopping. I can't imagine having to take care of a little one with all the "being present" I have to be for my teens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I knew I was done about half way through my second pregnancy, and if I wasn't completely sure, then I was SURE SURE about halfway through the labor. We've stopped at two and never regretted it for a moment, and I don't even really feel the desire to snuggle with other people's babies unless they are really close family like a niece or nephew. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickenpatty Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 My kids are growing, maturing, and challenging us daily. I bicker with 2or 3 regularly. my husband and I get cranky with each other more than we used to, and I feel overworked and under appreciated. So why am I pining for another baby? I don't know, but I feel the same way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5forMe Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I wish and hope the "I'm done" feeling would come over me. I don't like uncertainty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 My kids are growing, maturing, and challenging us daily. I bicker with 2or 3 regularly. my husband and I get cranky with each other more than we used to, and I feel overworked and under appreciated. So why am I pining for another baby? Because they are as cute.....and snuggly.....and don't argue with you. But....kittens ( praise God) become cats. :tongue_smilie: A baby is a prize just for Mamma. I stopped pining at 39, When my oldest got married and my youngest was giving me way more than I bargained for. He is still a handful, but pretty much civilized. I love babies.....just now, I like OTHER peoples babies:D It is an extremely precious time of life....thus we pine..... Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 Babies are totally darling. I think the best thing then is to spend your life being around babies, they just don't have to be yours! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Osmosis Mom Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I am the kind who loves getting pregnant, does it easily and carries easily and even had the last two deliveries be totally easy! So, yes, if my dh was into it we'd be having more. However, he is not. And I am busy now with the older kids and teenage-hood. Having the marriage be strong and being available and happy with the kids you have around is somewhat a high priority versus going through a year of having a snuggly baby and an uncomplicated relationship.....(with the baby, that is). I know people who get babies, even though their dh's are less on board than mine was initially, they are bickering with their older (still young kids), and are just plain stressed, yet having a baby makes them feel whole. There is a difference between loving babies (or being pregnant) and loving having a large family. It is ok to not want or get 10 kids!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Camy-7 boybarians 1 lady Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 (edited) I thought I would never want to stop having babies, however, I miscarried a 15 week baby (or "materials of conception" as the hospital called him) and this was so devastating. I thought I would never want to have another. However, God convicted us a few years after the miscarriage, and we had another baby. He is now almost 3 years old. The birth and pregnancy were rough on my at 42 years old...yikes..it was the first time I had an epidural! Nothing against epidurals, I just loved natural childbirth, and it was a huge change for me. Even the nurses (who had delivered 3 of our children prior) were surprised at this decision. I knew after that birth that something inside me had changed. From that point, we decided we were done with "enjoying the children of our youth." We decided that we definitely weren't feeling like youth! haha. In the past, I would see a baby and it would strike up my desire to be pregnant. Now when I see a baby I think "Someday I will be a grandmother." (haha,, seriously). Never thought this time would come, yet it feels just fine. Blessings to you! Edited February 16, 2012 by Camy grammar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica_in_Switzerland Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 If it were up to me, I would have a dozen. But it takes two to make a baby! My dh is older than I am and really wants to stop at three. I'm at peace with that, though I know I'll probably never stop wanting another. Sigh. I just love the new baby smell. And being pregnant. And (call me crazy) labor and birth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momto3boys Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 I probably would have kept having children indefinitely but I barely got DH to agree to #3! That being said I've also needed 3 c-sections and each of my pregnancies has been harder than the last so that was a deterrent too. I had them tie my tubes when #3 was born so we effectively closed that chapter. I get twangs of wanting more but I know three is right for our particular family and I try to focus on the journey ahead...mine are all little still and I'm looking forward to the schooling years with them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 Well, I didn't. So I went out and got some more kids. So my son is graduating this spring at 17. And my new kiddos will be adopted this spring and start homeschooling in the fall. We are also open for 1-2 kids, ages 0-8yrs old. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 Hmmm. I said for yrs after Princess that we weren't done, that we would have another son. Wolf disagreed. Done, done, done, according to him. Boo is 3 mths old now :lol: Honestly, another baby would be lovely. Boo being the last would be lovely too. I'm fine either way. Unless Wolf takes perm measures, or I get through menopause, it's always a possibility. Considering I'm not even 40 yet, menopause is a ways off :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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