DawnM Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I try VERY hard to not even start getting involved in debate or even strong opinions on FB. It just isn't worth the time and it a difficult venue for that sort of thing. But a friend has posted something that is really getting to me. I have spoken directly to her about it but she insists that she feels strongly about it and "needs" to post. It is really bothering me, and shouldn't, it is just FB. Just curious if you say anything if you feel strongly about it. Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annabel Lee Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 No, not anymore. I learned my lesson during the last big election. :) Posting on FB is like saying something out loud in front of all your FB friends. If you are bothered by her comment terribly, you'll have to decide if it's worth talking to her about it again, letting it go, or blocking her so that you don't have to see things she posts unless you go to her page. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThisIsTheDay Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I think one needs to tread very, very softly. If it's MY facebook page and MY personal status, I'm not interested in a debate. However, I don't mind someone pointing out the other side, as long as it's done with a lot of kindness and grace. For the most part, I already know my friends' beliefs on certain things, and I know with whom I'll never agree. I would never try to sway someone's opinion on FB though. Usually there are good points to both sides, and it might sometimes be okay to share. (Did I sound like I'm treading softly? lol) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted January 24, 2012 Author Share Posted January 24, 2012 I did debate recently, but it was really because someone was posting bigoted statements and I couldn't let that go. But normally when it comes to politics and most religious zealots, I don't say much at all. But I WANT TO! Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Negin Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I will agree or remain silent. I refuse to debate, which is often so hard to do. I then may hide their posts or remove them from my friends' list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
extendedforecast Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 There was a political post that a family member made that was very inaccurate and ignorant. I had a hard time staying out of that one, especially when other people added their dumb comments in support. This wasn't even a political figure I liked; I was just really bothered that people were bashing him on things that were outright lies. I made myself avoid Facebook for a couple of days so that I wouldn't have to see it. I know I could have blocked the person, but it was a family member on DH's side, and she rarely made political posts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ErinE Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 It's unlikely to change anyone's mind and feelings can be easily hurt. I never debate anyone on Facebook. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onceuponatime Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I used to, rarely, if it was important to me. It only took a couple of times to realize that it was a big mistake. Now my policy is never, especially if it is political. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I never debate politics. If they keep posting stuff that gets to me, I just block their posts. The only thing I remember ever debating about is library cataloging. Yeah, it's a wild life here! Anyway, I realized that the person who I was debating with was someone I often got into this type of discussion with (getting sucked into an argument), so I blocked all of HER posts, too. I don't do the online soapbox thing. Every once in a while I come across something I wrote online in a forum or whatnot from 10 years ago, and I'm soooo glad when I see it was relatively lowkey -- I've changed so much in all these years, but my name is still attached to those posts, kwim? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 It's unlikely to change anyone's mind and feelings can be easily hurt. I never debate anyone on Facebook. :iagree: In most cases this is absolutely true. If people's political or religious rantings become too much on my feed, I just turn them off. I almost never use FB as a soapbox, and if I might want to post a link, I only post it to people I know will be interested. A few weeks ago someone who has a HUGE reader base (I think a few thousand) praised a particular school in our district and I did post my own personal experience which was very different (my son went to 2 years of PS). In that case, I felt I really had to in good conscience. Several parents thanked me afterwards because they were in the process of looking at schools. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chepyl Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I avoid anything controversial ob Facebook. I have customers who are friends on Facebook, so I am careful about what I put up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paisley Hedgehog Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 nm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 My New Year's Resolution was to cut down dramatically on FB in 2012. I emptied my Friends list of everyone but family and people that I actually talk to IRL. (People who pass me in the hall at church do not count as Friends by this definition :glare:) I just did something similar. I have a few out of town relatives that FB is invaluable for (sharing pictures especially). And our local homeschool groups use it too, which is awesome. But I've cut many, many people out of my feed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I've pretty much given up FB, but I never debated anything on FB. I'm not the confrontational sort. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfatherslily Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I don't like to debate back and forth, generally speaking, but I will post my opinion if I disagree. ETA: Like here. You won't find me debating, but you will find me inserting my opposing thoughts from time to time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jplain Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I have, and I've always regretted it. To avoid temptation, I've hidden feeds from people who tend to post a lot of politics or religion. It is a bummer, because then I miss their kid pics, etc., but it just isn't worth getting riled up. I don't post about politics. But I still have to be careful who I allow to see certain posts that I make. I have some "friends" who pounce on the opportunity to debate my educational and nutritional philosophies. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 My policy is that Facebook is to be kept light. It's social networking, not debate team. I certainly don't agree with everything people post but I'm not going to lose friends over it. If I did feel the need to discuss something, I'd call the person or sit down and talk to them. It's SO easy to misinterpret someone's email or Facebook posts. Face to face is better if the subject is touchy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luvnlattes Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 (edited) I voted never. I'm on Facebook to catch up with friends' daily lives, see their photos, and hear their funnies, so those are the things I comment on. I ignore strong opinionated comments. Edited January 24, 2012 by luvnlattes typo!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 No, not anymore. I learned my lesson during the last big election. :) Posting on FB is like saying something out loud in front of all your FB friends. If you are bothered by her comment terribly, you'll have to decide if it's worth talking to her about it again, letting it go, or blocking her so that you don't have to see things she posts unless you go to her page. This is what I've done with my 20 year old nephew. He posts crude things and I've commented a few times but he just keeps on....so I unsubscribed to his feed...that way I don't see the drama/foul language daily but I am still his friend and can go to his page if I want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I voted never. I'm on Facebook to catch up with friends' daily lives, see their photos, and hear their funnies, so those are the things I comment on. I ignore strong opinionionated comments. And the teenage angst. Wow, do I get tired of that stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 To my mind, FB is just not a good place for debate at all. I stay out of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 My policy is that Facebook is to be kept light. It's social networking, not debate team. I certainly don't agree with everything people post but I'm not going to lose friends over it. I voted never. I'm on Facebook to catch up with friends' daily lives, see their photos, and hear their funnies, so those are the things I comment on. I ignore strong opinionionated comments. :iagree: I think one of the reasons I love facebook is that I do keep it light and fun. I have friends who seem to love posting things that will get people riled up (then they complain about facebook drama). I just ignore those posts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I voted Other. As a general rule, I avoid debating on Facebook, but it depends on the person. Some invite discussion and different points of view, and others don't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Georgiana Daniels Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 Nope. Nada. Never. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mimm Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 Never ever ever ever. :p Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heidi @ Mt Hope Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I voted rarely, only because I sometimes post things that other people might find controversial (like homeschooling, for example :) ). But I think I do so in a fairly graceful sort of way, and I don't debate things on other people's posts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 No, and I've removed content from my board from people who've tried it. I've stated that I don't host arguments, and I will delete anything that smacks of it. It's my wall. It's not why I joined FB. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueinNC Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 It's unlikely to change anyone's mind and feelings can be easily hurt. I never debate anyone on Facebook. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 For the most part, no. But during the holidays, someone posted a very judgmental, accusatory comment regarding celebrating Christmas and beside the fact she kept using the wrong word, she also took scripture completely out of context. So, me being me, I had to say something. Normally, I let that sort of thing fly by. But her attitude was so arrogant and her references so wrong that I couldn't help it. Well, I guess I could have helped it, but I chose not to. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotAVampireLvr Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 nope I don't even step in if I agree. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirch Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 Nah. Not worth it. Besides, the people who post the kinds of things I might be tempted to debate also tend to be the kinds of people who don't take well to dissenting opinions or respect reasoned opposition. Otherwise they wouldn't post such things to begin with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ohdanigirl Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I tend to stay away from that, especially Political one. There was just one time I couldn't help myself.... Someone posted something about coming home to find their neighbors screaming and possible domestic violence. Many of the responses were along the lines of "Bi@#$ needs to learn to listen.LOL", and what not. I said something along the lines of real men don't hit women, and the ones that do are compensating for shortfalls... The only person who got bent out of shape over my comment was another woman.:confused: My reason: It just so happens that we had been out with my SIL the night before, and had to leave abruptly when her ex walked into the place and she turned ghost white. I can only assume that he must have been abusive in some way. It's been a few years, but she was trembling and could barely walk out without my support. You just never know. Danielle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 Other: I really only say something when they are posting things that are totally untrue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happyhomemaker25 Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 (edited) And the teenage angst. Wow, do I get tired of that stuff. Seriously! If I see 'FML' on one more teenagers FB wall I might scream. My cousin's wife and I are very different but I thought we had a good relationship. When I posted something she did not agree with she would say so and I would do the same. One day she just unfriended me and I had no idea why. I found out later she thought I was trying to change her. I thought it was just friendly disagreement. I'm much more careful now. Unfortunately in the mean time she was told some pretty bad lies about my family and she won't be my friend anymore. I will post some controversial stuff on my wall sometimes. I'm a passionate person, especially about my beliefs. I don't need everyone o agree with me, but I won't tolerate someone bashing me for my beliefs, either. Oh, and I voted rarely. Edited January 24, 2012 by happyhomemaker25 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiobrain Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 (edited) I voted rarely. Sometimes, I don't mean to get into them, but I do. I NEVER do politics. Edited January 24, 2012 by radiobrain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfgivas Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 rarely. i do believe that all it takes for evil to triumph is for good people to do nothing, so there are times when i force myself to speak up when i'd rather not. eg. i won't let a racist statement go by. i work on a clear one sentence reply that is not accusatory, but states reality. i also address basic untruths, often linking to snopes..... again, as neutrally as i can. fwiw, ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess Peach Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I don't because that's not how I use FB. I use it to keep in touch with family and high school and college friends that are scattered around the country. If something was bothering me a lot, I'd just hide it. I just unfriended about 50 people. It was very freeing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funschooler5 Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I very rarely say anything on FB, let alone debate. However, a few weeks ago somebody posted something very judgmental about a certain segment of the population, and received a bunch of "I agree"s. There were about 3 mutual friends of ours that had a dissenting opinion, so I just "liked" their comments. (I typed out my own comment a few times but ended up deleting it.:tongue_smilie:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4everHis Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 my latest FB status? there is great wisdom in learning to keep your mouth shut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I voted never. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkInTheBlue Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I voted "never" because I don't debate on Facebook and very rarely here. My reason for never participating in debate there is that people, in general, have no idea how to debate. Most people still debate like 2nd graders. If it gets personal to themselves they quickly revert to "Well, YOU'RE stupid!". I don't play that game. I'd love a great debate if two people or groups have opposing opinions and can discuss ideas and oppositions without getting personal. P.S. I have not read previous replies. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 On occasion. But mostly I make sure those that are debating on FB (specifically on the fan pages/groups not personal pages) are doing so civilly and respectfully. I have been unfriended by 1 girl because I commented on her's about something. I don't even remember what exactly it was, but I didn't agree with her comments (it was a dialogue between a few ladies and her and they were agreeing with her, if I recall correctly she was posting generalizations about something and I posted my opposite experience with it.) Anyway she posted in response essentially "I'm right/you're wrong" and then unfriended me, so I got the message in my emails but could no long see/post to her wall. I have great debates/discussions on the walls of a few other friends but that is what they are looking for. On the pages it is a different story. Everyone wants to debate/argue it seems, more to bring the drama than to actually present their point. It is a PITA to have to forever delete comments and remind adults to be adults and not name call, or insult someone else's parenting/child, or make terrible comments (like telling moms they are intentionally poisoning their child because they use formula OR that they hoped their child was hurt in a car wreck because the mom didn't believe/follow extended rear facing) and other garbage like that. When I started admining a couple groups I really started to feel for the mods over here, and the hard work they do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 Life is too short. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hwin Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I posted rarely but could have said never.. I don't debate. I might back up a fb friend if they get some crazy comment on one of their statuses, though. I have a small friend list filled with reasonable people, so it doesn't get too dramatic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 The only time I engage is when someone makes inappropriate comments to my dd. I have to walk a very fine line between defending them and embarassing them to the point that then ban me from making comments at all. It's probably a good thing my dd's keep me in check because I can have a caustic tongue and it would be eassy to forget that I am dealing with children (bratty little children but children just the same.) Otherwise, FB is a way to keep in touch with family and friends and make sure that they are doing well. There is really nothing but commraderie and support there. I try not to engage here either because this is my happy place and I want it to stay special and stress-free. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TXMomof4 Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I've gotten involved exactly once in a tense debate on fb. Luckily it was with someone I love and respect very much - we just vehemently disagree on this subject. We duked it out, but ended just agreeing to disagree and acknowledging publicly that we can be friends even if I want to throw him through the window when we discuss that particular subject. As a practice though, I ignore most debates on fb. To much of a risk of unintentionally offending someone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tntgoodwin Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 I do all the time. But I do in real life as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted January 24, 2012 Share Posted January 24, 2012 No. It's not how I use my FB or others'. Edited to add: That seems odd, I supposed, given my proclivity to debate/discuss here. But I see the intent of the media as distinct and different. I also do want to say that I don't avoid debateable posts, necessarily, but I don't post them with the expectation of discussion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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